Transcript for MuggleCast Episode #392, #ProtectTheSecrets (HBP Chapter 12, Silver and Opals)
Show Intro
[Show music plays]
Andrew Sims: Welcome to MuggleCast Episode 392. I’m Andrew.
Eric Scull: I’m Eric.
Micah Tannenbaum: I’m Micah.
Laura Tee: And I’m Laura.
Andrew: What? What?
Laura: Hey, guys.
Andrew: Laura? The Laura?
Laura: I suppose if there is a The Laura, that would be me.
Andrew: Wow, yes, absolutely. Welcome back to the show.
Laura: Thank you for having me.
Andrew: How you doing? What’s new?
Laura: I’m doing great. I am currently hosting a little podcast called Millennial with Andrew, so that’s kind of my podcasting experience for the moment. But the other thing that’s new is I got to pet a red panda yesterday, and that was so cool.
[Everyone laughs]
Andrew: Is that prep for Fantastic Beasts or…?
Laura: Yeah, you have to know how to pet them appropriately, or else they will attack you.
[Andrew laughs]
Laura: It’s very similar to the fantastic beasts of the Potter universe.
Andrew: That’s awesome. Well, it’s nice to have you back on the show. I’m sure it’s been years since you were on.
Laura: Yeah, since I was properly on. I know y’all have called me a couple of times over the years to get my take on things, but I don’t think I’ve been on a full episode in at least five years.
Andrew: Yeah. And then Laura was visiting a couple weeks ago, and Eric and I were hanging out with her, and it just kind of came up, like, “Hey, you want to come back on the show?” And Laura was super into it, and we were like, “Okay, well, come on back.” [laughs]
Laura: Yeah, this works for me. And planning the doc this morning, I was having so much fun because there’s no politics. There’s no social unrest.
[Andrew laughs]
Laura: It’s just Harry Potter. It was just so great to plan.
Andrew: Yeah, it’s very refreshing. It’s pleasant to talk about. So you said it’s been a few years, and in the years since we’ve had a lot of our listeners actually coming on the show, and something we’ve been doing is getting their fandom ID to get a sense of them as a Harry Potter fan. So to get a sense of you, for any of our new listeners, why don’t you tell us your favorite book, movie, Hogwarts House, Ilvermorny House, and Patronus?
Laura: Sounds good. So my favorite book is Goblet of Fire. I don’t know if you’re looking for explanations for all of these things, but you’re going to get them.
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Laura: For me, Goblet of Fire really felt like a turning point in the series. It was the first point in the series where the stakes were really high; things started to feel really adult. And as an 11-year-old reading this book, I was like, “Oh no, things are getting real now; people are dying,” and that just made it feel that much more poignant to me. My favorite movie is Deathly Hallows – Part 1. I felt like as an adaption, this was the best of the movies. However, I do have a somewhat unpopular opinion: I also loved Prisoner of Azkaban as a movie.
[Andrew laughs]
Laura: I know this is controversial, but hear me out: Even though Prisoner of Azkaban was far from a perfect movie, I felt that it really set the tone for the rest of the movies in the series, and it really felt like the first movie to actually properly adapt the tone from the books.
Andrew: I’m more offended by you calling Deathly Hallows – Part 1 your favorite movie. I feel like that’s everybody’s least favorite movie.
Laura: Why? As an adaption, it was so good.
Andrew: Okay, all right. I don’t… it’s just so slow and nothing’s happening, I felt like.
Laura: Well, that’s the first half of Deathly Hallows, though. [laughs]
Andrew: Yeah, yeah.
Eric: Acting is happening, Andrew. It’s all about the characters.
Laura: It’s true. The kids did get better as they went on. I am a Ravenclaw, very proud Ravenclaw. I have tons of Ravenclaw memorabilia. My Ilvermorny House is Thunderbird, which I think is somewhat predictable, because it seems like everyone who’s a Ravenclaw is also a Thunderbird.
Andrew: Okay.
Laura: And my Patronus is an Irish Wolfhound.
Andrew: Not a red panda.
[Eric laughs]
Laura: No. I don’t know if that’s an option.
Andrew: [laughs] I don’t either.
Laura: I wish it were.
Andrew: We’ll have to look at the full list. Well, excellent. Thank you for reintroducing yourself here on the show.
News
Andrew: We do have some news to talk about, and then we’ve got some voicemails, and then we’ve got Chapter by Chapter. This is going to be the last Chapter by Chapter before our Fantastic Beasts discussions kick into full gear. But speaking of that, people have started seeing the movie! There have been these “fan first” screenings, and they happened on Saturday, and they got a new hashtag. [laughs] It’s no longer #KeepTheSecrets; it’s #ProtectTheSecrets, and J.K. Rowling has been pushing that on Twitter, and the fans received buttons. This is like Cursed Child all over again. People are seeing a new Harry Potter plot line early, and they’re begging people to now #ProtectTheSecrets. Why did nobody tell us about these? We could have signed up and went.
Eric: I have no idea. They did a dozen screenings across the US.
Andrew: Including one in Chicago yesterday. Very painful to not be there, knowing that it was so close, and yet so far. We actually know somebody who saw one of these screenings. I didn’t give him a heads up that I’m going to call him yet, though; I thought we were going to do it a little bit later. So let me give him a heads up; he’ll give us a spoiler-free review. But before that, I want to also mention that J.K. Rowling seems to be hinting at the third location of the third Fantastic Beasts movie. So obviously, the first one was in New York, and then the second one is primarily set in Paris. And this third one… oh, he just texted me. [laughs] “I’m actually listening live right now, so you can call me whenever.”
[Eric laughs]
Laura: Aw, that’s dedication.
Micah: Isn’t that the beauty of doing the show like this? That people just respond right away?
Andrew: Yeah, yeah. Just text me everything you have to say, Lucas; I’ll just read it on the air. No, I’m kidding. So what happened was J.K. Rowling updated her Twitter header art, and somebody asked her, “What is that new header art?” And she said, “It’s Rio da Janeiro in the 1930s.” So she made a typo; it should have been “de” instead of “da.” And then she realized her mistake, and J.K. Rowling then said, “Let’s just say I really ought to be able to spell Rio de Janeiro properly, given how many times I’ve written/typed it in the last few months.” We also know she’s been writing Fantastic Beasts 3 over the past few months; she has said so. So it looks like the third movie might be in Brazil. That’s kind of cool.
Micah: Either that or Cormoran Strike is headed to Rio.
[Everyone laughs]
Andrew: That makes less sense, though, doesn’t it? I think it would be very cool to see the new beasts down there. And I can only imagine how whimsical the wizarding world would be in Rio de Janeiro.
Eric: Yeah, definitely. I’m thinking colorful. I hope this is an opportunity to bring color back into these movies, because they’re all very noir. I mean, we’re hearing Crimes of Grindelwald is basically described as a film noir, so I’d be interested in seeing Brazil. More colorful beasts in the jungle.
Andrew: Yeah. Plus, as many of us may have seen on Twitter, people beg J.K. Rowling to come to Brazil, so maybe she’s finally just giving them what they want. She’s like, “I’m sick of all these people saying ‘Come to Brazil’ to me in my mentions.”
Eric: It’s also funny for a series that’s all about this corrupt dictator/politician/nationalist kind of guy, and for the films already being an allegory of World War II and the rise of Nazism, recent politics in Brazil are a bit surprising. [laughs] And I think that it’s kind of a natural fit for the series to have some something to say about that country. They just elected a guy who’s basically considered by the media to be the Brazilian Trump.
Micah: There you go, Laura. We made it almost ten minutes.
[Andrew laughs]
Laura: Dang. Yeah, I thought we were going to make it the whole episode.
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Laura: No, I’m kidding. Eric, I think you’re completely right, and I was thinking the exact same thing.
Eric: Do you think J.K. Rowling will shed some new light on it, or these films will be like a cautionary tale, or what? J.K. Rowling usually has a way of breaking through the political climate with a solid voice or character story. I just don’t know where she’s going with this.
Laura: Oh, I think she definitely will. I mean, she did the exact same thing with the Potter books, so I would expect nothing less from these movies.
Andrew: Yeah, yeah. It’d also be the first wizarding world story set in the southern hemisphere, so that could be interesting. It could be a whole different world down there.
[Eric laughs]
Andrew: And I guess the big question will be how do all…? No matter where the next movie is, it’ll be interesting to see how all the characters get there. This is moving a lot of people.
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Eric: Again.
Andrew: Yeah, right. All right, one more news story I just wanted to mention: Does anyone here play HQ Trivia?
Micah: I used to. I don’t play as much anymore.
Andrew: Yeah, I kind of fell out of love with it. I was playing it every night. This is the game… it’s like a live game show, and you can win money. There’s a cash prize, and then let’s say ten people win; those ten people split the cash prize. I wanted to let everybody know they’re doing a Harry Potter night, or a Fantastic Beasts night. We don’t know the details exactly yet. But it’s going to be November 14 – this is probably a sponsorship by WB – and we should all participate, and if we can’t beat this round of HQ Trivia, I think we’re hopeless. So we should all try to see if we can win, like, 20 cents.
[Eric laughs]
Andrew: Because usually that’s how much it ends up being once you split it amongst everybody.
Laura: So what you’re saying is this is our next best chance after not winning the Mega Millions.
Andrew: Exactly.
Laura: Okay, I’m in.
Andrew: I just feel like we have to be able to win this. Micah, you never won HQ Trivia, right?
Micah: No. How many questions are there again? I’ve gotten pretty far, but not all the way to the finish line, unfortunately.
Andrew: I want to say 12?
Eric and Micah: Yeah.
Micah: That sounds about right? I think I’ve gotten to, like, 9.
Andrew: Yeah. I’ve gotten kind of close like that as well, but never won. Eric, how’s Evanna doing on Dancing with the Stars?
Eric: Well, Evanna and Keo pulled in their first tens of the season, which is kind of cool. They’re rated, of course, out of ten, and they got two tens and a nine by dancing a tango to the song “Disturbia.” So they got a score of 29 out of 30, and they do advance to next week’s show.
Andrew: Evanna had a busy week, because she also saw Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald and interviewed the cast.
Eric: [laughs] It’s crazy.
Andrew: I don’t know how she… how does she have the time to do both of those things? [laughs]
Eric: I have no idea.
Andrew: Crazy. All right. Maybe Evanna is going to win this thing, in almost… she’s getting pretty far. How many weeks are left?
Eric: I think there’s only three weeks left, maybe?
Micah: Three?
Eric: Three or two.
Andrew: Damn. Okay, good for her.
Micah: I just happened to see a Facebook post by her this morning, and I think she said there’s three weeks to go, so they’ll be eliminating teams pretty quickly, I think, over the course of the next couple of weeks, because there’s definitely more than that that are left.
Phone call with Lucas
Andrew: All right, so let’s call Lucas. Lucas, as evidenced by what happened earlier, he’s a listener of the show. He attended one of these screenings on the West Coast.
Lucas: Hello?
Andrew: Lucas, how are you?
Lucas: Good. I mean, I saw the movie, so I pretty much have to be good.
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Andrew: Lucas, you’re on the West Coast. You attended a 7:30 a.m. screening in LA yesterday?
Lucas: It was 7:00 a.m. I showed up at, like, 5:00 in the morning.
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Andrew: And you were a fourth in line, right?
Lucas: Yeah, I was the fourth person in line. And I wish I was a little bit later, because then I would have been closer to the center, because the first person in line got the front seat.
Andrew: Oh, okay.
Lucas: Which was annoying, but yeah, it was good.
Andrew: Okay, so you saw the movie. You were kind of freaking out to me yesterday. How was it? And remember, we want to keep it spoiler-free.
Lucas: Yeah, so first of all, my favorite Wizarding World movies before this were Fantastic Beasts 1 and then Deathly Hallows 2, just so people have a baseline of where I’m coming from, and I really liked this one. And after first impression, I think it’s somewhere in between those two for me, but it’s possible that after repeat viewing, it will get better and possibly be above Fantastic Beasts 1. So first of all, there’s the whole #ProtectTheSecrets thing, and it’s actually very important. There are some minor spoilers that aren’t that big, but there are some things you definitely do not want to know when you go into this movie. It’ll really affect your enjoyment if you know everything ahead of time. And I’ve actually been looking online trying to find the main spoilers, and they’re actually very, very hard to find, so so far, people are doing a pretty good job. And this is definitely a much darker movie than the first one. I know they’ve been saying that, but it is true.
Andrew: And you think the things that happen by the end of this movie are really going to leave the fans shook? You were saying this stuff is so big that fans are going to be talking about this for a while.
Lucas: Yeah, there’ll definitely be some controversy about it, because some fans definitely will not like it. I like it, but it requires some thinking. And I mean, that’s part of what I like about it, is that we’ll have to theorize about a lot. So I mean, I’m really interested to see what the general fandom’s response is, because everyone I’ve talked to has been a super fan. I don’t know if they’re just hyped up because they saw it early or what, but yeah, that’ll definitely be very interesting to hear you guys’ reaction once you guys see it.
Andrew: I can’t imagine what the hell this is. I don’t want to know, but it’s just like, “Wow.”
Lucas: Yeah, I do have some complaints about the movie, though. So some of the characters make decisions that I don’t think line up very well with their personalities, at least as their personalities are established in the first Fantastic Beasts. But I mean, that’s also kind of debatable. I just personally think that, so that’s just me. There’s two characters in particular which I’m not going to say, but… I can’t really say anything else about that, but that’s just a thought I have. And then there’s something that I won’t mention, but I know Hypable wrote an article about this the other day that annoyed me. The article didn’t annoy me; the decision of the movie did.
Andrew: Yeah, damn right. We’re not going to talk about that on this week’s episode because it is very spoilery, obviously, but I think we’re all going to have a lot to say about that particular leak. Leaked by WB, by the way. That wasn’t…
[Eric laughs]
Andrew: They’re sitting here being like, “Protect the secrets,” and then they’re releasing these documents that reveal things. [laughs]
Lucas: Yeah, so that’s one of my… that’s my main complaint, actually, that particular thing, but… I really have no reason to… no way to defend that particular decision. Moving on.
Andrew: One thing I asked you yesterday: We’ve been kind of concerned that the movie might just be a mess because it seems like there’s so many characters and a lot of plot lines going on, but you found the movie to actually be pretty easy to follow and coherent?
Lucas: Yeah, but I mean, that’s also coming from someone that knew a lot going in. I knew about who all the characters were, and I knew what their motivations were, at least according to all the marketing materials. There was one confusing plot point that I still don’t fully understand, but that’s just because it was… not really glossed over, but I didn’t have time to take it in. And it’s a pretty big plot point, but it’s not emphasized that much. And I’m looking forward to getting the script book, because I want to be able to read what’s actually being said exactly in some of the scenes. But that will also get better on repeat viewings. And that is also one of the things that people will be theorizing about between the movies, I think, but I can’t say what it is, because it’s a spoiler. And then I also… another complaint was I think some of the characters were underused. I mean, there are so many characters and the movie is only so long, but I think there are certain characters that could have been in the movie more, but I guess they probably will be in future movies, so it’s not that big of a deal. But I mean, overall I really liked it, and this has been said by I think everyone that has seen it, but Jude Law and Eddie Redmayne were fantastic. And all the people from the first movie that were good were still just as good. And Johnny Depp was better than I expected, so that was good.
Andrew: Okay.
Lucas: I mean, in one scene he kind of embodied Hitler in a way, which I think is what he should be doing, considering I feel like Grindelwald is supposed to be Hitler, essentially.
Andrew: Yeah. Okay. Do you guys have any questions?
Micah: Yeah, I have one. This is more for Eric’s peace of mind, but were there enough beasts throughout the course of the film?
Lucas: Yes.
Micah: Did you feel comfortable with that?
Lucas: There were a lot of beasts.
Andrew: Okay.
Lucas: So anyone worried about that shouldn’t be worried.
Andrew: Do you like the title of the movie? Now having seen the movie, does the title make sense for this?
Lucas: I mean, yeah, it’s not the best title.
[Everyone laughs]
Lucas: I mean, it’s really generic. I mean, the plot of the movie barely ties in the title. It’s just generic.
Eric: So my big question is… you mentioned it’s a darker movie, but is it a bleak movie? Is it joyless?
Lucas: No, there’s some entertaining scenes. I mean, people laughed at several points during the movie.
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Lucas: But there are some just dark themes going on.
Andrew: Okay. All right, well, we’ll leave it there, Lucas. Thank you so much for letting us speak to you this early, 7:20 out on the West Coast.
Lucas: Yeah, no problem.
Andrew: And talk to you soon!
Lucas: All right, see ya.
Andrew: Bye. I love Lucas. Good member of the fandom. But hey, everybody, next movie, Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Dumbledore, let us know about these early screenings so we can go too.
[Everyone laughs]
Eric: Oh, we didn’t ask him how he found out about it.
Andrew: Oh, yeah. Oh, you know what? He told me; he just had seen a tweet on Twitter.
Eric: Oh.
Andrew: All right, so…
Micah: How do those things work, though? You just show up and whoever the first…? However many people get in, or…?
Andrew: He showed up super early because he wanted to make sure he got a great seat, I think. But he got a ticket reserved in advance through the Internet.
Eric: There was a web link that somebody sent me over Twitter. It was like you had to click on it; it was an official page with all the screening cities and you had to click “Get passes” and then kind of pre-register. I think it was free.
Andrew: Yeah, it was easy.
Listener Feedback
Andrew: All right, let’s move on to voicemails now. This one responds to last week’s Chapter by Chapter.
[Voicemail plays]
“Hi, MuggleCast. This is Kelly from Massachusetts. I’m calling about why I think Hermione Confunded Cormac. This book is hugely about the development of Ron and Hermione’s relationship, and I saw this moment as Hermione trying to do something nice for Ron because she has feelings for him, and not wanting to see an anti-Ron like Cormac take his spot on the Quidditch team. I’m not saying what she did was right; I think she just wanted to make Ron happy. Thanks for listening. Love the show. Bye, guys.”
[Voicemail ends]
Andrew: It’s a great point that I didn’t think of.
Laura: Yeah, that’s what I always thought it was.
Andrew: Well, we should have had you on last week.
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Laura: You just needed that feminine perspective.
Andrew: Yes, yes.
Eric: The voice of reason missing.
Laura: Oh, man. That’s a throwback.
Andrew: [laughs] All right, next voicemail.
[Voicemail plays]
“Hi, MuggleCast. This is Summer calling from New York. I just had two quick things I wanted to talk about. So I’m on student council at my school, and we did trick or treating for the grades 5-12. And I was listening to some old episodes where you were talking about how alive Harry Potter still is, and I was just so excited to see that 1 in probably 20 of the students were dressed as something from Harry Potter, which I just thought was so fun. I even saw a girl who had her hair dyed red to be Ginny, a few Dementors… it was just super fun to see how alive it still is. And the second thing is I’m on the Model UN team for my school, which is Model United Nations, and you randomly get assigned a country that you have to represent, and I got assigned Albania, and the only thing I know about Albania is that that was where Voldemort went to exile. So the conference is tomorrow; wish me luck. I might bring that up if I can, and I’ll let you know if it does me any good. Just wanted to talk about those two things real quick. Thank you for everything you do. Bye-bye.”
[Voicemail ends]
Andrew: Summer, I hope it went well.
[Eric laughs]
Laura: That’s funny.
Andrew: That would be a good icebreaker. “So honestly, the only thing I know about Albania is that Voldemort hung out there for a little while.” Did any of us see any Harry Potter costumes out over Halloween?
Laura: I didn’t see too many kids trick or treating this year, which really kind of made me feel discouraged, but I saw a number of adults that did Harry Potter costumes. Does that count? [laughs]
Andrew: Yeah, of course. I did a Harry Potter Hatstall last year. I was an undecided Hogwarts student, so I was wearing all four Houses’ clothing. But I didn’t do anything this year, I’m embarrassed to say.
Eric: This was the year that a bunch of friends on my timeline all just trotted out their Harry Potter gear and went as Harry Potter students, so that was cool. And I reused my old costume as well this year. But actually, J.K. Rowling retweeted… she spent basically the whole day on Halloween retweeting fun costumes from a lot of babies as baby mandrakes, which was really, really cool. A lot of like, the dad is Hagrid with baby Harry kind of thing. And then even some dogs, actually; a lot of people did Harry Potter costumes on their dogs this year. So definitely on J.K. Rowling’s Twitter is probably a pick of the crop.
Micah: Yeah. I’m with Laura; I saw a lot of adults dressed up in different Harry Potter costumes. Not as many kids, so maybe it’s just I’m not in an area that has a lot of kids trick or treating, but it still seems to be very, very popular.
Andrew: I prefer seeing the adults dress up as Harry Potter characters. And like Summer said, it is nice to see that people are still so passionate about Harry Potter to the point that they want to dress up to be one of the characters. It’s great. You really don’t see many fandoms or people being so proud of their fandom after all these years after the core series has ended. Of course, there might be a lot of Harry Potter costumes this year as well since Fantastic Beasts is about to come out and we’re going back to Hogwarts and all that. All right, here’s a pitch from one of our listeners.
[Voicemail plays]
“Hey, MuggleCast. This is Sean from Naperville. I’ve been married for about eight years; I haven’t heard pickup lines in a while, but I went out with some single friends last night and I heard a great one. It’s probably old, but it was, ‘I’m a Muggle in the streets, but a Slytherin in the sheets.’ What do you think? Bye.”
[Voicemail ends]
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Micah: How did that pan out? We need to know the success rate of that pickup line.
[Andrew laughs]
Micah: I’m guessing not too well.
Andrew: Yeah. One of our listeners needs to try that and let us know. But I also asked on Twitter, “What’s your favorite Harry Potter pickup line?” Somebody said, all one word, “Iwaswonderingifyoudliketogototheballwithme?” or, “Wangoballwime?” [laughs] I like this one from Mariah. “Is your first name Luna? Because you look like you love good.” I wonder if anybody has tried that on Evanna. This one’s appropriate for this week’s episode: “Is your name Mundungus Fletcher? Because you’ve stolen my heart.”
[Eric laughs]
Laura: Oh, that’s so timely.
Andrew: Yeah. Not so romantic, though. Dung isn’t very romantic. This one’s dirty; I apologize. “One night with me and they’ll be calling you Moaning Myrtle.”
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Andrew: Any of you have any that you like to use?
Micah: This one here from Caitlin isn’t that bad. “Did you just drink Felix Felicis? Because you’re about to get lucky.”
[Andrew laughs]
Laura: I like this one from Justin: “Can I Slytherin to your Chamber of Secrets?”
Andrew: That’s the one I think I hear the most.
Laura: [laughs] It’s funny.
Andrew: Yeah. “Is that a wand in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?” I don’t get it. I don’t get that one.
Laura: You’re just an innocent child, Andrew.
Eric: Here’s one: “Are you a Snitch? Because you’re the finest catch here.”
[Andrew laughs]
Micah: Along the same lines, Olivia said, “Do you play Quidditch? No? That’s a shame, because you’d be a total Keeper.”
Eric: Aww.
Andrew: I like it. I cannot imagine using pickup lines period. I would just bomb so badly. Maybe over Tinder or something, but that’s it. All right, here is another voicemail.
[Voicemail plays]
“Hi there. This is David calling from Canada. Was just listening to the episode where you covered the ‘House of Gaunt’ chapter in Half-Blood Prince. It just suddenly occurred to me that a lot of the conversations between the Gaunts in their family is all in Parseltongue, and while we know it as a reader because Harry understands it, I don’t believe Dumbledore speaks Parseltongue. So just wondering whether Dumbledore was able to draw the conclusions that he did just by the context of the situation, because all the conversation about Gaunt realizing that his daughter has a crush on a Muggle was all in Parseltongue, so not sure how Dumbledore would have been able to understand that conversation. So maybe he’s a closet Parseltongue? Probably not, but yeah, just came to my mind. Thought that was an interesting detail. Look forward to hearing your thoughts. Thanks so much.”
[Voicemail ends]
Laura: Oooh.
Andrew: I did some googling; there have been a few theories. My guess would have just been Dumbledore knew the type of situation he was getting into when entering this scene, and kind of could just use context clues to figure out what was being said exactly.
Micah: I agree. It was something I also wondered when we were reading the chapter last week, and going through that scene it was just surprising to me that he would be able to understand what was going on. And he kind of gave Harry that recognition of, “Yes, he is speaking Parseltongue. Good job, Harry.” So it just could be the fact that he’s so old and he’s so wise that he just learned it over time. Even if he doesn’t have that Slytherin blood in him, he just… he’s Dumbledore.
Andrew: Yeah. So maybe he can understand it, but not speak it himself.
Micah: Right, and I think… do we know that what was being said was absolutely crucial to what was going on in that particular scene? I mean, I think he was just trying to get a sense of who Voldemort’s family was, more so than just really understand what was being said back and forth between the family members. There were no secrets that were being divulged there.
Andrew: I agree. All right, and let’s end on a voicemail that Micah really wanted us to listen to.
Micah: Well, in advance, I’ll just say Laura, back in the day, used to be a big…
Andrew: Fanfiction writer.
Micah: You were very much immersed in the fanfiction world, right, Laura?
Laura: Oh, yeah. [laughs]
Micah: So we thought – or I thought – it would be only appropriate that we would play this voicemail and get your analysis and your thoughts. Maybe you even heard this one back in the day.
[Andrew laughs]
Laura: Okay, I’m ready.
[Voicemail plays]
“Heyyy, what’s going on? Crazy Harry Potter theory prediction for you guys… curious to hear what… what you guys think. Umm… [coughs] I think that Dobby and Draco are more connected than what meets the eye… I think because they both have five letters in their name… and they both start with the letter D… and I think the D is exactly what Dobby gave Draco’s mom…”
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
“… and that Dobby is really Draco’s dad, because Lucius can’t handle that body. You know what I’m saying? So I’m curious to hear what you guys think, if Dobby is actually Draco’s dad. That’s why Lucius kills Dobby. They’re both five letters… D… and givin’ the D. Dobby my man. All right, I’ll hang up…”
[Voicemail ends]
[Laura laughs]
Andrew: Dobby my man.
Laura: Okay, first question, what was this listener’s name?
Andrew: He did not introduce himself.
Micah: I don’t think there was.
Andrew: And I think I know why.
Laura: Okay, well, first of all, whatever that is that you have, I want some of it.
[Everyone laughs]
Laura: And you know, it would not be the most outrageous piece of fanfiction I ever read. We never got too much into this on the show, but I read fanfiction submissions from people who were trying to get their stuff published on MuggleNet FanFiction from people who shipped Minerva McGonagall and the giant squid…
[Andrew laughs]
Laura: … Ron and a hamster…
Andrew: Oh.
Laura: Of course, tons of Snape and Hermione type stuff. So I mean, this would fall right into the wheelhouse of a lot of the writers who submitted things. So depending on the quality of the writing, I would say I would maybe accept it.
Andrew: Wow. All right.
Laura: Maybe. If the heart and soul of your theory is there, then go for it.
Andrew: Wow. Inspiring words from Laura.
[Laura laughs]
Andrew: So caller, maybe you should write something now. Just get back to that level that you were at when you called us, and put pen to paper.
[Everyone laughs]
Andrew: I just wish I was with him. I wish I could be watching him in that moment when he was like, “I’m going to look up the MuggleCast hotline and call in with this.”
[Eric and Laura laugh]
Micah: It was like an epiphany, right? It clicked.
Andrew: [laughs] Maybe Chamber of Secrets was on in the background, Deathly Hallows, one of those movies with Dobby and Lucius. All right. Micah?
Micah: Not sure how I’m going to follow that, but I’m going to try.
[Andrew laughs]
Micah: Today’s episode is brought to you by Away.
[Ad break]
Chapter by Chapter: Seven-Word Summary
Andrew: All right, so this week we’re discussing Half-Blood Prince Chapter 12, “Silver and Opals.” Opals? O-pals?
Laura: Opals.
Andrew: Opals. And Laura, we’re going to kick things off with the Seven-Word Summary. I think you understand how this works. There’s no take backs; we’re doing it on the fly. It’s either going to be good, bad, or somewhere in between. Could be stupid, could be funny… who knows?
[Eric laughs]
Laura: So wait, just a quick clarifying question: Are we creating a sentence that has semantic coherence, or are we just throwing random buzzwords out?
Andrew: It should be coherent.
Laura: Okay.
Andrew: That’s the plan, but it might not turn out that way.
Laura: Got you.
Andrew: That’s the fun of it.
Laura: I will do my best.
Andrew: [laughs] Okay. Micah?
Micah: Draco…
Laura: … is…
Eric: … trying…
Andrew: … out…
Micah: … poisoned…
Laura: … necklaces…
Eric: … hooray.
[Everyone laughs]
Andrew: That was close to what I was hoping you would say, which was “today.” Draco is trying out poison necklaces today. But hooray! That’s good.
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Andrew: Hooray! He wants to kill somebody! Yay!
Chapter by Chapter: Main Discussion
Andrew: So with Dumbledore seemingly out of town – Harry doesn’t really know where he is – Harry is still enjoying his Advanced Potion-Making book, the author of which is still a mystery. And what’s interesting in this chapter in regards to this book is that Harry is trying out self-invented spells that the Half-Blood Prince created. There’s the hex that causes toenails to grow fast. There’s the jinx that glues tongues to the roof of a mouth. There’s Muffliato; that’s a spell that filled the ears of anyone nearby with a buzzing, which I think would just be kind of torturous if you couldn’t get that out of your ears. Although in the book, it’s like, “It’s to have privacy during a conversation!” But that would drive people crazy. And then Levicorpus, the nonverbal spell that he accidentally uses on Ron. But Micah, you were wondering… it’s kind of surprising that Snape didn’t catch on to him doing this, practicing these.
Micah: Yeah, well, not only that… I mean, my big point about this whole part of the chapter is that Harry is going beyond Potions at this point. It’s not just using it to do well in class. He’s trying out these spells on his classmates; he’s trying them out on Filch. Who knows what he could have ended up doing to Ron? He has no context for what these… I mean, maybe there’s a little bit here and there, but some of these others that he’s trying out, I mean, he could seriously injure somebody or worse.
Andrew: And again, we don’t know who the Half-Blood Prince is, so for all we know, this could be a Tom Riddle/Voldemort situation all over again. [laughs]
Eric: Yes, this is Harry completely disregarding all of the advice he’s gotten to this point, and actually doubling down on admiring the Half-Blood Prince. It’s actually fun to see J.K. Rowling’s word choice, because Harry is becoming obsessed at this point. She uses words like, “Oh, inventive… these are really creative spells, and Harry just can’t wait to try them on unsuspecting people.” Filch? Filch can’t defend himself. Harry is kind of a dick.
Laura: Yeah, I thought the same thing when I was reading this, and it particularly hits home when you get to the section where Harry sort of imagines or muses that his father might have been the Half-Blood Prince.
Andrew and Eric: Yeah.
Laura: He’s totally trying to romanticize it. And I was reading this like, “God, I am so with Hermione right now!”
[Eric laughs]
Andrew: Yeah. This could have been a good way for Draco to kill Dumbledore. He could have planted this book with spells in it that could kill Dumbledore. [laughs] There could have been a spell like… not Avada Kedavra, but something more discreet that Harry wouldn’t understand, and then the description next to it could have been like, “Present in front of the headmaster of the school.” Then Harry just goes and does it and kills him.
[Eric laughs]
Micah: But what about what he does to Ron, though? Because he does Levicorpus, and I don’t know that he knew that it was going to do anything to anybody, but Ron gets suspended up in the air, and then he’s like, “Oh, I’m going to try this counter-jinx that I hope works; I don’t even know that it’s necessarily for this spell to reverse it,” and it’s just… I don’t know. I think he’s playing with fire a little bit.
Andrew: He is. I’ll defend Harry there, though, because when there’s a jinx, there’s always a counter-jinx, right, in most cases? And what else is it going to do, send Ron higher into the air?
Micah: Who knows?
Andrew: Who knows… but there’s clues everywhere here. We just mentioned Harry wondering if it was his father who wrote this book, because James had done this same spell on Snape. But Hermione at one point says, “It doesn’t seem as though he was a very nice person,” the Half-Blood Prince. Okay, there’s a Snape clue. Ron said to Hermione, “You just don’t like that he’s better at Potions than you.” Kind of a reminder that this is a Potions expert who wrote the notes in this book. And then the line about Harry’s dad. “On the other hand, the Prince had proved a much more effective teacher than Snape so far.”
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Andrew: And that’s to throw the reader off the case.
Laura: [laughs] Ba-dum-tss.
Andrew: So let’s talk about these self-invented spells, though. It reminded me that we actually don’t know how a spell is created; at least J.K. Rowling has never explained it herself. I did some reading online to check out some theories, and one that I really liked is the idea that it’s like cracking a code where you must combine some Latin, some motive, some wand direction, which sometimes is meaningful, like Wingardium Leviosa; you bring the spell upward, so you want to make it float. Is it just putting together the pieces until you find the right combination? How do you guys think it works?
Eric: I think it works just like that. If you note in the book a couple of times, certain words or prefixes or suffixes are crossed out until it’s gotten just right. I think that’s what it is. It’s basically like… it’s not inventing a spell so much as discovering it. But it’s kind of being co-created, so the spell always existed if you knew what it was, kind of a thing.
Laura: I think of it in terms of how we invent pharmaceuticals or come up with medical breakthroughs. They’ve always been there; we just haven’t found them yet.
Andrew: This could be a big career for somebody, I feel like, and you would think that there would be some sort of department at the Ministry or elsewhere in the wizarding world that’s dedicated to finding these spells. It seems very important to know them all.
Eric: Yeah, that actually… I wonder if there’s a standard wizard dictionary of all the spells you can do, kind of like… I’m thinking about how the Oxford English Dictionary adds a couple words every year, that there would be this department at the Ministry, like you’re saying, the Department of Discovering New Spells, or if they were a Ministry name it would probably be ten times longer. But basically to come up with and inform the public of what these spells are.
Andrew: And in another life, Snape could have been… if Hogwarts didn’t work out, if being a Potions teacher didn’t work out, he could have probably had a job where he was just discovering spells, because I was also looking at a list of people we know who have “invented” spells, and Snape, as far as we know, has discovered/invented more than anyone else.
Eric: Who are the others on that list?
Andrew: Oh, random people. Dumbledore has a couple, but then there’s several just people we hear once and then never again.
Eric: Yeah, because I was going to say there’s kind of a… the cross between what Snape does in Potions and him being the Half-Blood Prince, inventing these spells, seems to be that Snape’s personality lends itself to having a lot of patience, right? Figuring out what the best ingredient is in a potion is not dissimilar from figuring out what the suffix is on a spell. It’s just it takes a certain personality to kind of stew on what the correct answer is, or if there’s a solution.
Andrew: So we asked on Patreon.com/MuggleCast: How do you think a spell is created or discovered? Coriann – I hope I’m pronouncing your name right – says, “I feel like it has to be a mixture of trial and error, and also intent behind the spell. Like the right incantation or wand movement has to be discovered, but the ability for the magic to be manipulated in such a way already exists.” Owen says, “I doubt somebody could just stumble across a spell. I think intent is necessary. You have to know what the desired result is, and then once you know, you choose an incantation that will help you achieve the same result in the future.” Karen says, “Silly people. Spells are made, like honey, by spelling bees.” Ah.
[Eric and Laura laugh]
Andrew: So yeah, I just thought that was interesting, and that seems like such a huge area of the wizarding world we really don’t know anything about yet, spell creation. I would love to hear J.K. Rowling’s thoughts on it. I thought for fun, we could each create a spell, and the theme here is one that Snape could use, one we think he really needs in his life. Mine is Looseabuttress. It unclenches one’s butt and relieves severe stubbornness.
[Eric laughs]
Andrew: What’s yours, Eric?
Eric: Mine – I don’t know if Snape would use this, because it’s kind of helpful – but I came up with Blanketus. It’s a wave of comforting warmth that spreads over your body.
Andrew: Because he needs love? Is that what you’re saying?
Eric: Yeah, because it’s really cold, and this chapter is very nippy and windy and bitter.
Andrew: [laughs] Nippy.
Eric: I’m reading this chapter; I’m like, “People just need blankets at Hogwarts.”
Andrew: Well, especially down in the Potions room dungeon.
Eric: Oh, yeah.
Laura: Mine is one that I think that somebody should actually use on Snape. It’s Exsultimus, and it makes someone cry their years of trauma out.
[Andrew laughs]
Eric: Oh, man. How did you come up with the incantation?
Laura: I took the Latin root for cry.
Andrew: Oh, darn. I was like, “I need something with the word butt in it.”
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Laura: You always do. It’s fine.
Micah: [laughs] This show just got so much smarter.
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Micah: And I went with Redoucheify. I think it’s pretty self-explanatory.
Andrew: [laughs] Okay. So the trio head to Hogsmeade, and they bump into Slughorn, who tries to invite Harry to one of his Slug Club meetings again. And Harry makes up an excuse, but Hermione actually… she’s kind of into them at this point. She’s like, “Oh, you should really come to them. They’re fun. You should appear sometime.” It’s interesting that Hermione has come to actually like these, and I’m wondering why. Is it because she likes the social aspect? Or is it something like she gets to hear all these conversations about older families or maybe get some intel about what’s happening in the wizarding world? Why does she like these?
Eric: Isn’t it…? I mean, for me, I think we’ve pointed out a couple times throughout the years doing these Chapter by Chapters, but there’s very few social clubs at Hogwarts. There’s very few opportunities for these students – especially if they’re not in the same Hogwarts House – to interact with their peers outside of class, and I think that Hermione would probably just really appreciate the perspective that being in the Slug Club is like. I think she’d agree that it’s flawed, that it’s very elitist, but she also doesn’t often get recognition for her actual intelligence. She’s one of the few people who earned her spot in the Slug Club, and I think she’s kind of proud of herself for distinguishing herself in that way. I mean, if you look at her two best friends, too, they rarely, except when needed, appreciate her brilliance, so I think that she is kind of taking the opportunity to allow herself to pat herself on the back for being part of this club. And then there’s also just the general social aspect of interacting with people who are also distinguished. It’s kind of a cool idea in theory; the Slug Club is just run by Slughorn, who’s corrupt or ill-advised.
Andrew: It’s kind of like the cool kids group, and I could see Hermione connecting with that as well because of course, early in the series, she’s an outcast. She doesn’t have anybody to be friends with. And then, of course, in that first book, Hermione is really struggling to become friends with Harry and Ron, so to suddenly be invited to such a prestigious group would feel good.
Laura: Yeah, I think the invitation aspect part of it plays a role. Hermione seems to have some, I don’t know, maybe anxiety surrounding the fact that she’s not usually the first person people think to ask or invite to things, and she very clearly wants to be included. So I think this is an area where she just feels like there’s an intention of including her in something, and so she’s taking ownership of that, and she’s trying to encourage Harry to take part in it because she doesn’t think it’s all that bad, and perhaps she sees his snubbing of the Slug Club as sort of an indictment of it and, therefore, of her.
Andrew: Yeah. “Come on, Harry. Don’t insult my cool group.” But Harry doesn’t like that attention either, so I can understand why he doesn’t want to appear.
Laura: Right.
Eric: Yeah, isn’t it weird that Harry is now avoiding Slughorn, given what comes up later in this book? [laughs] Harry is going to great lengths in this chapter to avoid Slughorn. He’s scheduling practices on top of the Slug Club dinners. It’s kind of funny.
Andrew: So again, we’re in Hogsmeade, and the trio go into the Three Broomsticks, and they run into Mundungus and Aberforth. Is he mentioned? Did I miss that?
Eric: Yeah, “Harry recognized the barman of the Hog’s Head, the pub across town,” is the quote.
Andrew: Oh, okay.
Eric: Yeah, so Aberforth was just buying stuff off of Mundungus. They’re exchanging items right when Harry walks up, but Aberforth does not stay to chat. So I don’t know if he got some goat tonic he needs to administer or what, but…
Micah: I don’t think so. I can’t remember, though, is Aberforth doing this now at the request of his brother?
Eric: I think he’s a free agent, kind of? He’ll report stuff to his brother, but I don’t think he’s specifically… I mean, he gets the mirror, but I don’t think he gets the mirror because it’s Dumbledore’s will that he does; I think he just happens to have it. I don’t know. I think he’s legit buying from Dung, but if anybody comes into his tavern, he’ll give his brother a heads up.
Andrew: Yeah, I’m not sure we ever get a firm answer to that, Micah. So Harry sees this going on, and he’s pissed that Mundungus is selling some of Sirius’s – now Harry’s – belongings, and he vows to tell Dumbledore. But I do believe in this scene, he did buy the two-way mirror. I do think that this is that particular scene.
Eric: And how about the shout-out to the two-second Tonks? [laughs] She’s there to defuse the fight, but then disappears immediately as soon as they go into the building. Tonks shows up, but is barely… I don’t know. She’s just there at a crucial moment.
Andrew: Yeah. Well, she’s distant this entire book, isn’t she? She’s sad Tonks in this book.
Eric: Yeah, yeah. But Harry is just like, “He’s nicking Sirius’s stuff!”
Andrew: Yeah, and Tonks doesn’t really care.
Eric: No, because she’s not really sad about Sirius. I mean, she is, but it’s not… you know.
Andrew: And so as they head back to Hogwarts, Katie ahead of them is opening up the package she was Imperiused into bringing back to school, and then it sends her up in the air. And the trio report what they saw to McGonagall, and again, Harry is convinced that Draco is up to something bad here. And Harry tells McGonagall his Draco theory, and McGonagall says, “Well, no, Draco was with me in detention,” so that throws Harry off. It also throws the reader off, because it’s getting really confusing. Still, though, someone was looking to get something cursed, and purchased at Borgin and Burkes, no less, into the castle, and as we later learn – I just wanted to mention this now for context – Draco Imperiused Madam Rosmerta, who Imperiused Katie, and then the plan was for the necklace to get to Dumbledore and kill him on contact. But the reason it didn’t kill Katie was because she was wearing gloves on a winter’s day and only touched an extremely small part of it through a hole in her glove, so it sent her into the air screaming. Draco’s idea was that by giving it to Katie, Katie would give it to Filch and say it was a gift from Rosmerta to Dumbledore, and that would bypass Filch’s Secrecy Sensor, because remember, he was checking everybody. But given Filch’s assignment to use the Secrecy Sensor in the first place, how could Draco be sure that Filch wouldn’t scan it for Dark magic?
Eric: Right.
Andrew: That doesn’t seem like a solid plan to me.
Laura: Well, most of what Draco does in this book is not solid planning, because he doesn’t actually want to be doing it. He’s scared.
Eric: So you agree with Dumbledore’s assessment that his heart isn’t really in it?
Laura: Yes.
Eric: Because I mean, he’s committing an Unforgivable Curse, Imperiusing… not to mention where he learned to do it, but to Imperius Madam Rosmerta for I think a prolonged period of time is pretty crazy.
Andrew and Laura: Yeah.
Laura: I mean, I think he’s being peer pressured and bullied into it by his parents, his aunt… Voldemort even. So he’s scared of them, but he’s also scared of doing something that he can’t take back, so I think he’s doing these things very halfheartedly.
Andrew: Yeah. If I was Draco in this point in the series, I probably would have just run away and waited for this wizarding war to come to an end.
Micah: Go to Rio.
[Everyone laughs]
Micah: One question that I did have about this particular part, though, is what’s up with the security? Not just the Filch part, but this is all taking place in Hogsmeade, and presumably there are Aurors there. It doesn’t seem like a lot is really being done in the way of security to prevent against all this from happening.
Andrew: Yeah, they probably shouldn’t have been going to Hogsmeade in the first place, right? Because that’s an…
Micah: Yeah, but almost going back to one of the earlier chapters, where Harry gets stuck on the train because Draco finds him and Stuns him and leaves him there with a broken nose, there should have been bells and alarms and all these other things going off the second Harry didn’t even get off the train. So I almost think of the same thing here, where in Hogsmeade, you have this kind of activity going on and nobody’s paying attention to it. I don’t know if it’s just Tonks’s responsibility. Doesn’t she have two other Aurors who are with her?
Eric: Yeah, Dawlish and… Proudfoot? Or Proudstrong? Proudheart? Something like that.
Micah: Savage and Proudfoot.
Andrew: Padfoot. Kidding. [laughs] Yeah, well, I feel like instead of Filch having a Secrecy Sensor – which in the movie, it looks like a metal detector, one that he holds – there should be airport metal detectors that are Secrecy Sensors, where you have to walk through to get anything through, because one person checking everybody isn’t very secure. It’s probably very easy to bypass him. And I know there are other precautions in the castle, but if you can walk by… if Draco seems to think even a little bit that this plan might work, then the security at Hogwarts is flawed.
Laura: Well, it’s kind of always been flawed, right?
Andrew: Oh, yeah. It’s a mess.
Laura: None of these stories could happen if it wasn’t.
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Andrew: Yeah, and then of course, the Vanishing Cabinet is one big flaw.
Eric: Well, people keep… I guess it’s probably a good literary technique, but people always are talking about how safe Hogwarts is, how that’s the only place – especially when Dumbledore is there – that Voldemort can’t attack; he only dares attack it when he’s reached the height of his power at the end of the next book. And it kind of gives us this false sense of security. And I remember reading this for the first time, and I was genuinely surprised at the reveal of the Vanishing Cabinet. I thought it was cool and clever how Draco manages to bypass Hogwarts security. So I did think it was a satisfying enough mystery at the time of how to… because Hogwarts is secure; it’s just the plot of these books is all about finding the ways around it.
Laura: The notion of sort of this narrative that Hogwarts is the safest place to be, it reminds me of the way that a lot of us in the West think about our countries. I can’t speak for England because I’m not from there, but I think about the US, and oftentimes the narrative is that the US is the safest place to be, we have the best protections, blah, blah, blah, and there have been several events to prove that that’s not necessarily true.
Eric: Right.
Laura: So I don’t know if that was an intentional parallel she wrote in there.
Andrew: Yeah. Well, like you say, without these loopholes, a lot of these elements in these stories wouldn’t happen. But part of the fun of being a reader is trying to figure out, well, how are they penetrating the security of the castle? And in the case of this necklace… now, I feel like… let’s say that this necklace did get to Dumbledore. He would have backed away, right? He wouldn’t touch that with a ten-foot pole. Or would he have fallen for it, if he heard it was a gift?
Laura and Micah: No.
Micah: He would have used his blackened hand to open it; this way he would have been okay.
Andrew: Ooh, you think so? You think that would have saved him?
Micah: No, I would agree with you. I don’t think he would have opened it in the first place. It goes back to what Laura was saying earlier; Draco is still a teenager. His approach to doing all this is very juvenile, and I think that comes out later in the confrontation between Dumbledore and Draco on the tower. He’s just a kid, and his attempts reflect that. I don’t think somebody as wise as Dumbledore is going to fall for a mysterious package in the mail.
Andrew: But this was partly Voldemort’s idea, wasn’t it? The necklace?
Laura: I don’t know if Voldemort has the time to deal with such low level plans, right? I can very much see him being the one to say, “Your mission is to kill Dumbledore. I don’t care how you do it; just do it.” So this could have been something that Bellatrix helped Draco come up with, or he could have come up with it on his own.
Andrew: Yeah. To push back on that, though, I mean, is it low level for Voldemort, if we’re talking about killing Dumbledore here? That seems like an important part of this plan to work out.
Laura: Yeah, I just don’t think he cares how it’s done.
Andrew: Okay.
Laura: I think the logistics and the details of it don’t matter.
Andrew: Did Voldemort know that Dumbledore was gay? Did he think Dumbledore was going to want to put on this necklace?
[Laura and Micah laugh]
Laura: I’m sorry, do gay men have a penchant for wearing opal necklaces?
Andrew: Well, that’s what I’m asking here. Maybe Voldemort knows something that we don’t about what Dumbledore likes to do. Look, just a theory! I’m trying to examine all angles here, okay?
[Laura laughs]
Micah: He should have clearly sent him a pair of socks.
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Andrew: That kill. What were you going to say, Eric?
Eric: I tend to think that Voldemort just kind of gave Draco the generic order of “Kill Dumbledore,” and Draco was responsible for the particulars.
Andrew: So that’s why Draco went into Borgin and Burkes and said, “Okay, hey, I need something here.”
Eric: Yeah, maybe. But I mean, it is Draco’s idea, I think – because he boasts about it – to use the Vanishing Cabinet. It’s just that took the longest. So in the meantime, he’s like, “Well, I’ll send a cursed necklace.” Bless him; I think he is trying-trying, at least on the surface level.
Andrew: Yeah. All right, so that’s pretty much the chapter. Pretty straightforward chapter; not the most exciting stuff happening, but we do see some Dark magic happening, and yeah. Damn you, Draco. So we are going to do Connecting the Threads and MVP of the Week and Rename the Chapter, but first, it’s time for a word from another sponsor.
[Ad break]
Connecting the Threads
Andrew: All right, so connecting the threads this week, there was a big one: that darn necklace! Harry saw it in Chamber of Secrets when he accidentally went to Borgin and Burkes instead of Diagon Alley. “Diagonally.”
[Eric laughs]
Andrew: Did J.K. Rowling…?
Eric: Yeah, what is the point of this necklace? You can’t even put it on. You can’t even admire yourself in the mirror without it killing you. What is the…? Who’s the intended recipient of this? I don’t mean right now; we know that. But what is the…? If we had to make up the origin story…
Andrew: Right, what was it made for? Yeah.
Laura: To be a murder weapon.
Andrew: Yeah, but why does it still exist? There’s a note on it that said it killed 18 Muggles or something like that. So Borgin and Burke should be put out of business. They’re selling things that kill people! Why does the Ministry let such a place exist?
Micah: That’s a good question, especially now. They should be shut down.
Andrew: Yeah. So amazingly, J.K. Rowling included this in Chamber of Secrets very briefly, and then it comes into play four books later. Have to again ask ourselves if she plotted it like this.
Laura: I think so.
Andrew: Yeah?
Laura: I think Harry Potter is a total frame narrative in which Goblet of Fire serves as the centerpiece, and Books 1 and 7, 2 and 6, and 3 and 5 correspond.
Andrew: Nolan, who’s listening live, says, “It’s a collector’s item. Some rich pure-blood asshole just wants to put it on a shelf.” [laughs]
Laura: Fair point. [laughs]
Andrew: Evelyn also brings up a good point: “Why are there gun shops?”
[Eric laughs]
Laura: Yeah, really good point!
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Andrew: In the wizarding world constitution, does it say the right to bear…
Eric: Necklaces?
Andrew: Necklaces? Deadly necklaces? [laughs]
Eric: Everybody vote tomorrow.
Andrew: Yes.
MVP of the Week
Andrew: All right, time now for MVP of the Week. Micah, who’s yours?
Micah: I went with good old Hagrid.
Andrew: Why?
Micah: Coming through in the clutch, grabbing Katie, taking her up to the castle, making sure that she was okay.
Andrew: Aw.
Micah: So he gets my MVP.
Andrew: In his big, strong arms.
Micah: That’s right. Those big bear arms.
[Andrew laughs]
Micah: Grizzly bear.
Andrew: He’s got a right to bear arms.
[Everyone laughs]
Andrew: Eric?
Eric: I gave my MVP of the Week to Hermione. Everybody’s sass game is a little bit more on point in this chapter, and Hermione basically calls Ron out for looking around to catch a glimpse of Madam Rosmerta, who he’s enamored with. She says, “Ron, what are you staring at?” He says, “Nothing,” and Hermione replies, “I expect ‘nothing’s’ in the back getting more Firewhiskey.”
[Andrew laughs]
Eric: So I don’t know. She’s kind of calling him out there for leering.
Andrew: Laura?
Laura: I said Professor McGonagall, because I love the way she shuts Harry down at the end of the chapter. Harry was annoying the crap out of me during this because he was really coming across as paranoid and unable to reason and just not rational, and I really enjoyed the point where, when Harry was refusing to give her details and wanting to speak with Dumbledore, she said, “Anything you have to say about this horrible business can be said to me, I’m sure,” which, as a professional woman, I have found myself in this scenario a million times where I have had to be like, “No, no, I can handle it. You can tell me.”
Andrew: Yeah, I love that. [laughs]
Micah: She’s also his Head of House. I mean, I’m also throwing that piece of it in there; he should feel more than comfortable going to her after knowing her for going on six years.
Laura: Right.
Andrew: And maybe McGonagall herself is a little frustrated that Dumbledore has been out of town so much.
Laura: Yeah, probably.
Andrew: Because how much does she know about what Dumbledore is up to? My MVP of the Week… I forgot to think of one, and I’ve been pushing mine off. [laughs] I’m going to give mine to Mundungus, because he still has the nerve to steal things out of a dead person’s home, and it takes quite the character to be able to do that type of thing. So Mundungus, I give MVP of the Week to you for all the wrong reasons.
Laura: You would.
Andrew: Are you saying I’m evil and would do such a thing?
Laura: I’m not saying you’re evil, but I mean, if you were in a dead person’s house and you saw something you really liked, are you telling me you wouldn’t think about it?
Andrew: Are you saying you would do that?
Laura: No, I’m asking you.
Andrew: Yeah, but you’re framing it like, “Why wouldn’t you do it?”
Laura: Well, you picked Mundungus as your MVP, so I’m not sure what you’re capable of.
Andrew: So when my grandmother died a few years ago, my dad and I were sitting in one of the rooms in her house, and we found a $20 bill in a Christmas card that she never sent to anybody. We took the $20 bill without telling my aunt, who was the… what’s the word?
Laura: The recipient?
Andrew: No, no, not the recipient. She was in control of the estate.
Eric: Oh. [laughs]
Andrew: And we stole that $20.
Laura: So you still stole that from her?
Andrew: Yeah.
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Laura: I rest my case.
[Andrew laughs]
Eric: It was father/son bonding.
Andrew: Damn it, I am a nugget. Yeah, right, exactly. [laughs]
Rename the Chapter
Andrew: All right, so let’s rename the chapter now. Micah, go ahead.
Micah: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince Chapter 12, “Dumbledore 1, Draco 0.”
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Eric: That’s a good one. I went with Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince Chapter 12, “Frostbite and Pearls.”
Andrew: Nice. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince Chapter 12… [screams in a high pitch]
Laura: That was a good scream.
Eric: That was great.
Andrew: Well, Laura, that was you screaming, so…
Laura: Oh, that’s right. I forgot.
[Everyone laughs]
Laura: And I went with Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince Chapter 12, “When Harry Met Hormones.”
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Micah: Nice.
Andrew: I want to see Mary Grand-Pré create art for that one.
[Eric laughs]
Micah: Just out of curiosity, what did Brooklyn do when you just did that, Andrew?
Andrew: I can’t see him right now, but I’m sure he woke up from wherever he’s taking his nap. Also, my neighbors are now calling 911.
[Everyone laughs]
Eric: It was a very cursed scream.
Andrew: Yeah, thanks. That was the point.
Quizzitch
Andrew: So Laura, about… gosh, I guess a year ago now, we started playing Quizzitch here. Can you imagine what this is? It’s like Quidditch, but it’s a quiz, and we play with our…
Laura: Yeah, I think the name accurately portrays that.
Andrew: Yeah, one of our listeners came up with it; he’s a teacher, and he plays Quizzitch with his students, so we were like, “Hey, can we steal this for the show?” [laughs]
Laura: Aw, that’s cool.
Andrew: Yeah. So what was last week’s question, Eric?
Eric: Last week’s question was based on this chapter of the book, and the question was: Who delivers Dumbledore’s message to Harry about his second lesson? This is a recurring thing in this book, where people are delivering letters from or for other people, or messages. The correct answer was Ginny, and I’ve got to say, we’ve actually given a lot of screen time to people who submit the correct answer over on Twitter for coming up with creative and inventive profile names, because that’s how we credit everyone who’s got the correct answer. And we’ve got some real zingers this week.
Andrew: Uh-oh.
Eric: Yeah, so I think everybody pretty much…
Andrew: Raised the bar?
Eric: Raised the bar, yeah. Absolutely. So the correct answers were submitted by Potter Hobbit; The Insufferable Know-It-All; Charlie, Father of Dragons; Vaping with Dad; Sean Brady; Vanessa Cho; and somebody called Where in the World Is Kevin Steck?
[Everyone laughs]
Laura: Nobody knows.
Micah: No, he’s here in New York. I saw him last week.
Eric: Oh, what? You did, Micah?
Micah: Yeah, I saw him last weekend. I think that was last weekend.
Andrew and Eric: Oh.
Eric: There you go.
Andrew: Well, where was he?
Eric: Did you guys get drinks in New York?
Micah: In New York, drinking.
Andrew: [laughs] The only place we see Kevin anymore.
Eric: You guys, I think somebody actually created this account specifically for us, because there’s zero followers, joined October 2018, and it’s at @WhereintheWor16.
Andrew: [laughs] I love that.
Micah: I do hope Count Ravioli is okay, though.
Andrew: Yeah, what happened to them?
Eric: Count Ravioli… their last submission, I think, was on September 1.
Andrew: Whoa.
Eric: So we hope you’re okay.
Micah: Maybe they went back to school or something.
[Andrew laughs]
Eric: I’m just going to do a quick tweet check… oh, they tweeted three days ago. They’re fine.
Andrew: Oh, phew. Good. And what is this week’s question?
Eric: This week’s question, actually… so we’re getting away from chapter reading, everybody, so Quizzitch might be going away.
Andrew: What?!
Eric: Or I’ll just come up with non-book-related. I don’t know; we were going to do that for a Chapter by Chapter thing, right? Anyway. Well, for now, it might be on hold, but until we decide, here’s next week’s Quizzitch question, about the films: To date, the Wizarding World film series has won one Academy Award. In what category was the award?
Andrew: Okay, that gets us ready for the movie. So you can submit those over on Twitter, if you know the answer.
Eric: Be sure to use hashtag #Quizzitch.
Andrew: Oh, so trendy. So modern.
Eric: Not as trendy as #ProtectTheSecrets.
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Eric: It’s amazing how many tweets I see on my timeline with that now.
Andrew: I can’t get over that they used a different word than they did with the Cursed Child. Why not just keep #KeepTheSecrets? Why do they need a different hashtag for keeping these secrets?
Eric: I wanted to ask Lucas if the secrets were better than the secrets we had to keep last time.
Andrew: [laughs] So next week, that’s going to be the final episode before Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald comes out, so we are going to make lots of predictions, and then we can see how right or wrong we are. Of course, we’ve been making predictions about what’s going to happen for the past two years…
[Andrew and Eric laugh]
Andrew: … but now we’re kind of going to solidify everything. We’re just going to go through a list, get it all organized, and we want listeners to give us their predictions as well. So keep an eye out this week on our social channels and Patreon for questions we want you to answer, and the idea is we’re going to ask you a different question on Twitter, on Facebook, and Patreon, and through voicemail. So it’s going to be a whole big prediction episode next week; it’s going to be a lot of fun. And then after that will be our review of the movie, so by two weeks from now, we’ll have all seen it, and we intend to be talking about it for quite a while. And based on what Lucas said earlier in today’s episode, and based on what we’ve been hearing from people, it sounds like there’s going to be a lot to discuss. So that’s what’s coming up on MuggleCast. If you have anything to say about this week’s episode, feel free to email in; MuggleCast@gmail.com. Call us; 1-920-3-MUGGLE. That’s 1-920-368-4453.
Micah: I wonder, Andrew, are we going to end up with a voicemail about Dobby appearing in the Crimes of Grindelwald?
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Andrew: “Hey, man, so Dobby has got five letters in his name, and there’s going to be five movies in this series, J.K. Rowling says…”
[Laura and Micah laugh]
Andrew: “… and today, Monday, is November 5; that’s five, and there’s five days in a work week…” [laughs] Anyway, Laura, it was very nice having you on. Thanks for joining us.
Laura: It was great to be on. Thank you for having me.
Micah: Her name also has five letters.
Andrew: “Laura, your name has five letters in it…”
Laura: Oh my God.
Andrew: “… did you do the deed with Dobby?” [laughs]
Laura: Maybe if I have enough of a substance to make me forget.
Andrew: So we’ll have to have you on again in the future. Somebody in the chat – who was that? – James said, “It feels like old days with Laura back.”
Laura: I know! This has just felt like such a really nice throwback. I feel ten years younger.
Andrew: Oh, that’s reason enough to do this show.
Laura: I know.
Andrew: [laughs] It’s like walking around a college campus. You feel young again.
[Laura laughs]
Andrew: All right. Thanks, everybody, for listening. I’m Andrew.
Eric: I’m Eric.
Micah: I’m Micah.
Laura: And I’m Laura.
Andrew: See you next time. Bye.
Laura and Micah: Bye.