Transcript #25

MuggleCast EP25 Transcript


Intro


Ben [Show Intro with music in background]: This is MuggleCast – Episode 25 for January 29th, 2006. This week’s show is sponsored in part by GoDaddy.com, your No. 1 source for all of your Internet needs. GoDaddy.com has domain names, transfers, and renewals for as low as $1.99. Plus, check out their hosting plans, website builders, secure certificates and much more! Plus as a MuggleCast listener, enter the code MUGGLE, that’s M-U-G-G-L-E, when you check out and save an additional 10% on any order. Get your piece of the Internet today at GoDaddy.com.

Also this week, we’re very happy to introduce our first-ever MuggleCast T-shirts. Be the person people notice – in a good way – walking down the street, by supporting the show. Our T-shirts come in two different styles and three clothing types – regular T-shirts, long-sleeved, and women’s fitted. Just go to MuggleCast.com and click on “Store” at the top to order. And with that, let’s start the show.

John: Hey everybody, and welcome to another episode of MuggleCast. I’m your favorite MuggleNetter, MuggleNet Greg, bringing it to you this week.

[Everyone acts puzzled]

Andrew: Ummm, I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: Ummm, I’m Ben Schoen.

Eric: I once was a man named Eric Scull.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Laura: Ummm.

Andrew: Ummm.

Ben: MuggleNet Greg?

Andrew: Hold on.

John: Muggle… Yeah.

Andrew: MuggleNet Greg? Yeah. Hey!

John: Did I miss my cue here, boys? I apologize.

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: No, no. You did fine. Just…did anyone invite you this week? Or… This is sort of…

John: I did get that postcard in the mail the other day.

Andrew: Oh…oh, right. Right.

Eric: He’s MuggleNet Greg. He doesn’t need an invitation.

Andrew: Right. That’s cool.

John: Is there…

Andrew: Okay.

Eric: He doesn’t need an invitation.

John: Ummm.

Andrew: Alright. Well, if you want to host, just…

Ben: But dude, hold on.

Andrew: …go ahead.

Ben: Hold on. MuggleNet Greg…

John: Alright.

Ben: Wait a second.

John: What?

Ben: MuggleNet Greg sounds an awful lot like someone else.

John: No, surely you must be mistaken. There’s only one MuggleNet Greg.

Andrew: No, he sounds like MuggleNet Greg.

John: There’s only one MuggleNet Greg.

Andrew: I’ve heard…I’ve heard MuggleNet Greg on PotterCast. I know he’s for real.

Ben: But who is that guy from The Leaky Cauldron, from PotterCast. What’s his name?

Andrew: Kim Blaire?

Ben: No, no, no.

[Eric laughs]

Ben: His other name.

John: They have a podcast. When did they have one?

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: I know. It’s total crap.

Andrew: iMuggle? [laughs, then yells] I’M CONFUSED! THERE’S TOO MANY MUGGLES!

Ben: Well, there is only one good one.

John: Yes.

[Laura and John laugh]

Ben: Okay, the jig is up. Guys, the jig is up.

John: The jig’s up.

Ben: Joining us this week is PotterCast’s John Noe.

[Andrew laughs]

John: Oh my, you just spilled the beans.

Ben: He’s now MuggleCast Pyromaniac – that’s his nickname.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: For those of you who don’t know, John almost burned down his dorm last week.

[Everyone laughs]

John: No, that’s probably getting a little over-exaggerated there.

Ben: Oh whatever, dude. The fire department had to come and his windows were bursting out, and flames were everywhere.

[Andrew laughs]

John: Only three kids jumped from the balcony.

[Everyone laughs]

John: But, that was not my fault. They over-reacted. They would have jumped anyway.

Ben: Okay guys, enough chitchat. Let’s go to Micah for the News.


News


Micah: Thanks, Ben.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire has now climbed to No. 9 on the list of the highest-grossing films of all time, one place behind Chamber of Secrets. The fourth movie has accumulated more than $286m domestically and over $589 million overseas, bringing its international total to $874.9 million, roughly $2 million behind the second Harry Potter film.

Each year, NBC’s morning news show asks special guests to sign a coffee table book to sell for charity. The 2005 book includes signatures from Dan Radcliffe and Emma Watson and is currently up for auction on eBay. All proceeds will go the Lupus Foundation of America (LFA).

Jo Rowling attended a press conference in the Romanian government’s Victoria palace in Bucharest this past week. At the press conference in Bucharest, Jo spoke about her concerns for the mental and physical well-being of children in Eastern European orphanages. She said, “There is now widespread agreement among child health experts that irreparable long-term damage is caused to young children who are institutionalized without a parent.”

Yahoo! News reported that during the charity dinner in Bucharest, the Harry Potter author raised a €170,000 by auctioning off six signed Harry Potter books and purchasing a famous Brazilian footballer’s shirt. A number of photos from the event can be seen through various sources over on MuggleNet.com.

Voting for the 2006 AOL Moviefone Moviegoer Awards is now open. Nominations are in the areas of Movie of the Year (Goblet of Fire), Actor of the Year (Dan Radcliffe), Actress of the Year (Emma Watson), Best Scene-Stealer (Brendan Gleeson), and Vilest Villain (Ralph Fiennes).

Warner Bros. has announced that the Goblet of Fire DVD will be released on March 20th in Britain. Here in the U.S., it will hit shelves on March 7th.

Earlier this week it was confirmed that Katie Leung, the actress who portrays Cho Chang will be back for Order of the Phoenix.

In book news, the Polish translation of Half-Blood Prince was released to eager fans in a thousand bookstores across the country yesterday at midnight on January 29th.

Yesterday’s Daily Telegraph has a early preview of what we will be seeing at this year’s Book Aid International Auction, benefiting the poorest countries in the world. JK Rowling is one of the authors who are participating in the donation of a special item related to their books. Her item is a handwritten version of the Black Family Tree. The auction will be held in London on February 21st.

Finally, be sure to head over to JKRowling.com as the Harry Potter author has updated both her Diary and News sections this past week.

That’s all the news for this January 29th, 2006 edition of MuggleCast. Back to the show.

Ben: Thanks, Micah.


Announcements


Ben: Now, let’s go to the Announcements. This week we have tons of announcements, right, Andrew? Maybe two.

Eric: Yeah, all three of them.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Do you want to do one, Andrew? Do you want to do an announcement?

John: I want Eric to do one. I want Eric to do one.

Andrew: MuggleNet Greg, hold up for a second. First of all guys, I have a bone to pick with you.

John: MuggleNet Greg says…

Andrew: What’s going on? Joe Vitale beating us on Podcast Alley. What is up with this? I mean it’s… [laughs] Who is this?

John: I happen to like Joe Vitale. He’s this guy who commentates on sports, on college basketball.

Ben: No, no, that’s Dick Vitale.

Micah: Yeah.

Ben: That’s Dick Vitale.

John: No.

Ben: He’s like, “I smell upset city, BABY!”

John: Yeah. [laughs] That guy.

Ben: “Yeah!”

John: Isn’t that that guy?

Andrew: This is Joe.

Ben: No.

John: Oh, son of a gun.

Ben: But the point is, the point is…

John: It’s his brother Joe.

Ben: ..we’re sucking it up on Podcast Alley and we need your help.

Andrew: We haven’t asked in a few weeks.

Ben: Go out and vote for MuggleCast on PodcastAlley.com.

John: Yeah.

[Ben and Andrew laugh]

John: And if you forget how to spell MuggleCast, you can probably type in PotterCast. You know, it’s the same thing – Harry Potter.

Andrew: Oh, I knew this would happen. Lots of shameless plugs.

[Laura laughs]

John: It’s all good.

Andrew: [Laughs] Yeah.

John: Shameless nothing.

Ben: [Laughs] Yeah. Hey Eric, Eric, Eric, did you have something to say – an announcement of some sort?

Andrew: [Whispers]: Just don’t talk.

Eric: Andrew can do it if he wants to.

Andrew: As we mentioned last week, don’t forget, we have our MuggleCast Remix, which is basically a look back at all the past episodes – from Episodes 1 to 23, I believe it is.

John: Woo-hoo! Golly!

Andrew: Yeah, aren’t you impressed? [laughs]

Eric: Cool beans.

John: Oh, funny.

Eric: You should check it out, though.

Andrew: Yeah. It was headed by Eric Scull.

Eric: Hooray.

Andrew: You put in all the hours in on it and we recommend everyone check it out. It’s long, it’s not just, you know, your average everyday remix. It’s a MuggleCast remix. We don’t mess around.

Eric: That’s right. That’s right. [starts humming]

Andrew: So, check that out on the MuggleCast site at MuggleCast.com. [Says something that can’t be understood] Oh, I screwed it up!

[Eric says something weird]

Andrew: Over to you Ben.


Main Discussion – Ronald Weasley


Ben: Over to me. Oh geez, what’s going on this week, Andrew? Oh yeah, at the end of each show I always comes up with some random character and we end up discussing them. This week, it is Ron.

Andrew: Oooh.

Ben: So, it’s time to go on to our Main Discussion of the week. Oooh. Throw the confetti everywhere. Yay! Main Discussion time.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: Andrew, do you have, what’s that one site? HP-Lexicon? Do you have that up?

Andrew: Oh, you mean…part of the Floo Network, which is also in affiliation with The Leaky Cauldron.

John: Oh, I’ve heard very good things.

Eric: Okay, stop plugging. Honestly.

John: Well, we’re not called that anymore.

Andrew: What?

John: We changed the name.

Andrew: What do you call it?

John: Yeah.

Eric: It’s MuggleNetGreg.org.

John: It is Leaky News, LeakyNews.com.

Andrew: Oh, right. I thought you were talking about the network got changed. But anyway… [coughs]

John: Noooo. [laughs]

Andrew: He was born March 01, 1980. He’s a pureblood…

John: Ohhh.

Andrew: …with five brothers and one sister, blue eyes, and green hair? Oh no, red hair.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: And in the book he’s described as a tall, red-hair, and gangly…gangling…gangling…

Ben: Gangling…with freckles, big hands and feet, and a long nose.

Andrew: What on Earth? [laughs] I’m sorry, but that’s kind of raunch.

[Eric laughs]

Ben: His Patronus is a Jack Russell Terrier. His Boggart is a spider.

John: “Boe-gart.”

Ben: And in the future…whatever it is. And in the future he wants to pursue a career as an Auror.


Time stamping The Series


Eric: I wanted to start off this week, since it’s Ron, and since I’m back, and I’m happy to be back and all that crap. I mean, all that stuff. I wanted to start off by saying I noticed…

Ben: Steal the show?

Eric: …when you were going to the Lexicon stuff, you said Ron’s birthday was the first of March, 1980. Now, I for one, don’t agree or never really have agreed with labeling dates.

Ben: Put a timestamp on the series?

Eric: Putting a timestamp on the series. Right. This whole 1980 thing, and I realize, you know, the main reason is the 500 years since Nick died, and you know, 1492, and that kind of stuff, but I really don’t think there is substantial evidence. And I think in the first few books, there had been people who had proved that she was purposefully trying to make the series unplottable. So, do you guys agree with this whole timestamp thing: from 1955 to 1970, the Marauders went to school, and…

Andrew: Yeah, it makes it feel old.

Ben: I don’t like it.

Eric: Yeah, I really don’t like it either.

Ben: Personally, I think it takes away from the timelessness of the series.

Andrew: Right. That was so ‘99.

Eric: Not only that…

Ben: Yeah, whenever, whenever you read it, you want to make it feel like it’s happening right now. Not that, “Oh yeah, this was 1983,” this is happening.

[Eric laughs]

John: I don’t think Jo’s too up into that.

[Andrew starts singing “I Want To Party Like It’s 1999”]

Eric: Yeah, Jo hasn‘t really, like she hasn’t come out said…she hasn’t confirmed it. I mean, has she?

John: I think she’s on the fence because she doesn’t really give recent dates, but then she puts in stuff like, “Yeah, you know, Dudley got a PlayStation for Christmas.”

Eric: Well, right.

Laura: Yeah.

John: That’s going to be irrelevant in twenty years, ten years even.

Eric: Well that’s…

John: Playstation what? PlayStation 5? It doesn’t say.

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: But isn’t there a timeline on one of the Harry Potter DVDs?

John: Yeah.

Eric: I think so.

John: There’s going to be one on the new one too.

Eric: But it’s a question about…

Andrew: Yeah, so, what’s going on there? Who proved all that? That’s always been a big question, hasn’t it?

Eric: Yeah, I think it’s a matter of…

John: I think they can for the third one or the second one, that Jo helped them out with that thing. The timeline.

Eric: I think JK is starting to give in.

Andrew: I guess, just basically what we’re trying to say is that even if Jo confirms it, we still see it as a little strange to date the book. Because that’s basically what it is.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: And that’s like saying, you know…

Andrew: I agree with Ben that it throws you off. You don’t, it doesn’t feel…well it doesn’t completely ruin it, but you don’t get that current feeling.

Ben: It’s not as timeless, yeah. You don’t feel…like when I’m reading the books, I want to feel like it’s happening right now, that I’m with Harry, that type of thing. Where, when Harry’s fifteen… For example when the last couple books have came out, I was the same age as Harry.

Laura: Mhm, same.

Ben: I don’t know, it just felt like…

John: Awww.

Ben: I want to think that it’s happening right now, rather then “Oh yeah, this was ‘X’ number of years ago.”

Laura: Oh yeah, I completely agree with that. I mean it’s that whole feeling of growing up with the series and being the same age as Harry when you read the books. I’ve never really thought too much about the timeline on it. I’m pretty indifferent to it because when I read the books, it’s about reading the books. I don’t really care what timeframe it’s happening in.

Eric: And I think with…

John: Yeah.

Ben: Because since the books are still being released, I think that takes away from…that adds to the timelessness of it too because right now, since we don‘t know what’s happened even though theoretically in the series, it may be in the past, we still feel that it’s still in the future for us. If you get what I’m saying. If you catch my drift.

Laura: Mhm.

Eric: Yeah, and you can’t say that JKR didn’t use current events to influence what she writes.

John: Yeah. So like, your timeline and all this stuff has actually already happened years ago, that sort of thing.

Andrew: Yep. So back to Ron.

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: That was very impromptu. That wasn’t on the schedule, Eric!

Eric: Oh, I’m sorry.

Andrew: You’re killing me.

Eric: Sorry.

Andrew: Prove the world wrong. We do plan our shows out, we do!

John: It’s actually brilliant.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs]

Ben: Okay, guys, something everyone’s dying to know.

Andrew: Yeah, right.

John: It’s even color-coded. With little clip arts.

Ben: Hey Andrew, Andrew, stop taking away from the show.

Eric: Color-coded black and white.


Would Harry Have Befriended Draco?


Ben: What do you guys think? Did Ron prevent Harry from going to the dark side by becoming friends with him instead of Harry becoming friends with Draco? Basically, if Harry had not have met, yeah, if Harry wouldn’t have met Ron…

Micah: No.

Ben: …on the train, do you think things would be a different story?

Eric: No.

John: No.

Laura: Nope.

Eric: Micah?

Micah: What?

Andrew: Well, he…

Laura: Well, obviously he wouldn’t have Ron, but he wouldn’t have gone to the dark side.

Ben: Doesn’t Harry find strength in his friends, though?

Andrew: And Harry was…

Laura: Yeah, to a degree but…

Andrew: Harry didn’t know… Oh, how do you put this?

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Harry wasn’t sure…[laughs] Okay, if he had become friends with Draco, he would have, he would have…Was it possible for him to get into Slytherin?

Micah: Sure.

Andrew: Okay, so it would have been a completely different ballgame.

Laura: Not necessarily. No, no, because it’s been…a theme that has been presented throughout the all books is that our choices define who we are.

Eric: But you know what, Laura…actually…

Laura: Harry didn’t like Draco, from the moment he met him in Madam Malkins…

Eric: Wait, that’s true but… Wait! Laura, Laura, Laura…

Laura: Harry chose not to be put in Slytherin. I don’t think Harry would allow himself to go over to the dark side.

Eric: Wait, if it weren’t for Ron, he wouldn’t actually know that all the dark wizards were in Slytherin. He might not actually be opposed to Slytherin because he wouldn’t have found out beforehand, before the sorting ceremony, that Slytherin was bad.

John: Hmmm.

Laura: That doesn’t mean he’d be a dark wizard though.

Eric: No I mean, I agree completely and wholeheartedly that he’d be good guy no matter what. But as far as being put in Slytherin because, he might have actually been because if you think about it… I’m just trying to bring more validity to this question because we’ve already talked about how, you know, Harry’s…

John: Well, this question is also saying about…it’s putting it in the context of Ron becoming friends with Harry at the beginning, but I think also we have to remember and at least I hope this actually happened in the book and not just in the movie, [laughs] I haven’t read the first book in a while. Draco making fun of Ron at the beginning.

Eric: Yeah.

John: And just Draco demonstrating the kind of personality he is.

Eric: Yeah.

Laura: Mhm.

John: And I think that initial introduction to Draco like that there…I mean, I know they met at Diagon Alley, or wherever the hell they were trying on clothes, but I think that that’s also one the purposes for the character of Dudley is to parallel these two people in Harry’s mind and that Draco reminded him of Dudley immediately made it clear to Harry this is not someone he wanted to be friends with.

Eric: Oh, and you know what?

John: I think, regardless of whether or not he met Ron he would have known that he wouldn’t like Draco and…

Eric: And that…that was a…

John: While he could have ended up in Slytherin, that really…

Eric: Yeah.

John: I don’t think that would have guaranteed any other choices.

Eric: I like that parallel, MuggleNet Greg.

Laura: Mhm. Yeah, me too.

Micah: Yeah, I completely agree with that. The way he was brought up, I think that he never would befriended Draco to begin with.

Eric: Yeah, he got hand me down clothes just like Rupert did…I mean…sorry…Ron.

John: Exactly.

Eric: Yeah, growing up with Dudley and stuff. So, that was very nice, MuggleNet Greg!

[Andrew laughs]

John: Yeah, MuggleNet Greg is good for one of those every once and a while. Now, I’ll mute for 30 minutes until I think of something else.

Eric: Don’t go mute! Don’t go mute.


Quidditch


Ben: [Laughs] What about Ron’s Quidditch skills? He kind of guided the team in Book 5 to the Quidditch…to the House Cup…to the Quidditch House Cup…whatever you want to call it. The Quidditch Cup I guess. [Laughs] What do you guys think about his Quidditch skills?

Eric: I think it was very cool how Ron was characterized as being the kind of person who, if he lets his emotions get in the way of his Quidditch playing, you know, he can’t do it…he can’t do a thing…and he lets himself get defeated by his own, you know, confidence. But, if he has confidence, he can do anything. I really like…I think that fit with Ron in, you know, the rest of the world, not just Quidditch.

Ben: Anyone else have anything to say?

Laura: Yeah, you pretty much took the words right out of my mouth. So…

John: I think the lessons he’s learning from that about confidence when he’s playing Quidditch is probably going to help him if there is any kind of war scenario in this last book where he’s going to be doing fighting and stuff.

Andrew: Now, when he looked into the Mirror of Erised, was he Captain of the Quidditch team or was he on it?

Eric: That’s the question…

Ben: He was Captain.

Laura: Yeah, he was Captain and he was Head boy and all this other stuff.

Eric: But all this stuff, he actually…you know that’s coming true or something, isn’t it?

Andrew: What’s coming true?

Eric: Isn’t it starting to come…a lot of what he saw in the mirror?

Laura: Well, sort of. He got on the Quidditch team and he became a prefect.

Eric: He’s Head Boy…no he’s not Head boy…he’s a prefect.

John: And didn’t, wasn’t Hermione in the mirror too, with her hands in his pocket, I thought?

Andrew: [Laughs] What?

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: [Laughs] No.

[Everyone is still laughing]

Eric: MuggleNet Greg! That’s dirty!

John: [Laughs] I thought…

Andrew: Report him.

Ben: John doesn’t know that he comes from PotterCast.

Andrew: PotterCast!

Ben: Actually, I’m going to call up iTunes. Call up Jobs and make sure he removes your “Clean” rating from your Podcast.

John: Hey, you know the day they stick us with an “Explicit” tag, is the day our ratings triple.

Eric: That’s true.

John: “PotterCast: Unrated.”

Andrew: Well, I think he’s already…


Harry’s Stupid Little Friend


Ben: Yeah. [laughs] What do you guys think about Ron always being overshadowed by Harry? Everyone’s always viewed him as “Harry’s stupid little friend.” He’s never really made a name for himself, if you guys understand what I’m saying. Do you think Ron will be able to step out from under Harry’s shadow?

John: That’s…

Ben: Because we’ve seen the jealousy towards Harry because, Harry got to be a Triwizard Champion and all of those things.

Laura: I think Ron’s matured beyond that, though.

Eric: Yeah, I think they do view him as a separate person, though. I mean, they realize he’s Harry Potter’s friend and that’s all cool. But, I think, in the later years there are more and more moments where he gains more respect, you know, separately as far as…you know in the fifth book and all those Quidditch triumphs and “Weasley is Our King” and stuff. Those are things that happened to him without Harry.

Laura: Well, Lavender is a perfect example of the fact that people are starting to see him as his own person.

Eric: I really like that, that’s…yeah. So, even though it may have seemed like that at first, the older they grow together, they know more and more about their fellow Gryffindors, you know? They know them more as individual people. The thing about what’s going on with Voldemort is that many things happen to each individual’s family that it really separates them apart. So, you know, when Mr. Weasley got attacked, you know, everybody could see that happened to Ron, and even though, Harry had a lot to do with it. I think that they were separate. Like, Seamus and his mom…basically all the Gryffindors are individually characterized more and more throughout the books. Some people are their own individual people, just generally.

Laura: Uh-huh.

John: Yeah. Well the only real worry about looking at Ron as Harry’s “stupid little friend” is what happened to the characterization of Ron in the movies. That’s where you want to see Harry’s little stupid little friend.

Eric: Yeah.

John: …and watch, you know, number three.

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: But, Laura’s right, he’s sort of matured out of that, and I think it shows by him becoming a part of the Quidditch team that he’s becoming…

John: Oh yeah, totally.

Andrew: …his own person and building his own reputation.

John: In the books, that’s never supposed to be. I mean, that may be his poor self-image of himself, but he’s supposed to have a lot of positive traits in the books.

Eric: Yeah.

John: They just missed those chapters when they were writing the script.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: [Imitates Ron in a high pitched voice] “My wand, look at my wand!”

John: …up late reading, yeah…

Andrew: Steve Kloves was lazy…oops! Skipped six chapters.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Yeah, that was Columbus…all, like at the press conference, “Yeah, we were going to do the Death Day Party, but…next question, please.”

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Steve was like, what? When did that happen? What? You didn’t see Steve Jobs sneaking out the other side of the limo, you know, during that interview?

Andrew: How does Steve Jobs always make his way into our conversations?

Eric: Not Steve Jobs, I meant Steve Kloves, sorry. I’m sorry, Steve Kloves. Kloves.

John: [Laughs] You have a crush on Steve “Jobes”!

Ben: “Jobes”?

Eric: I don’t even know what he looks like, actually. I’ve never even seen a picture of him.


Ron and Hermione


Ben: Well, guys, speaking of romance, what about Ron in Book 6? He’s sort of started to lay the mack down on Hermione.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: I think he’s desperate at this point…he’s desperate at this point.

Ben: Do you think they are a match or not?

Eric: I don’t think Ron is boyfriend material in certain ways. He is for Hermione and I think that’s why…I mean, I think if it’s Hermione…

Laura: In five years, Eric! [laughs]

Eric: What?

Laura: No, as of right now, Ron… Okay, if I were Hermione, he would drive me up a tree. He would absolutely drive me insane. I would want to strangle him. And I think that Book 6 completely brought that across.

Eric: No, no, no, that’s if you were Laura.

Laura: No!

Eric: If you were Hermione…

[John laughs]

Eric: No, Hermione loves him, she’s…

Laura: I’m sure she does, but she also set off a flock of birds after him. [laughs] I mean, he clearly ticked her off.

Eric: Well he…she has feelings for him and I think if you were Hermione, you would have the same feelings, but if you were Laura, you’d strangle him, and, you know, rightfully so. But, you know…

Laura: I would strangle him regardless, because he’s an idiot sometimes.

John: Are you a man-hater, Laura?

Laura: No!

Eric: You’re a Ron-hater!

Laura: If I were a man-hater, how could I do this show every week? Come on. [laughs]

Eric: You do hate us! You threaten us…

John: That’s a very good point.

Andrew: [laughs] Good point.

Eric: …Andrew has to edit out the death threats. I helped him edit one day and counted all the death threats we get.

Laura: That’s right. Mhm.

[Laura and Andrew laugh]

John: Oh, Laura.

Eric: Yeah, people…

Andrew: Let’s pause now for editing.

John: To tease Laura.

Andrew: We’re back!

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: That’s great.

Ben: Awww, geez. Okay.

Eric: Micah, Micah, what do you think about Ron and his…

John: What are we talking about?

Eric: What do you think about Ron and his…

Andrew: Uh, Micah dropped out. Micah dropped out.

Eric: Micah dropped out?

John: What?

Andrew: Micah dropped out and then he went offline. I don’t…he’s…I guess his internet is sucking. His modem fried and then now he’s on wireless, so I think he has a problem.

[Andrew and John laugh]

Eric: So, let’s talk about this a little bit more. Ron: boyfriend material? MuggleNet Greg, what do you think?

John: Let’s think here. MuggleNet Greg thinks that Ron had to go through the trial that was Lavender before he can have a relationship with Hermione.

Laura: Yeah. Mhm.

Andrew: Yeah, I agree.

John: I forget where I discussed this with, and who it was, but I think after Ron’s bouts of jealousy with Hermione and Krum, I guess he probably had to figure out what exactly it was that he wanted…

Eric: You know, that’s…

John: …if he wanted a girlfriend. Why did he want a girlfriend? Did he want it just so he had somebody to make out with in the common room in front of everybody?

Ben: Of course. Social acceptance.

John: Or, for the other good things, you know?

Eric: You know what? That happened to everybody.

Ben: Dude, hang on a sec, there are other things?

John: [laughs] Well, one day, Ben, you’ll meet that right, lucky girl.

[Everyone laughs]

John: Who you will have a connection with.

Andrew: Ben, now, this is called a…

Ben: What?

Andrew: No, but I think Lavender was sort of like a test monkey…

Eric: Test monkey.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: No, she was prepping the oven, man, prepping the oven.

Laura: It’s really sad to say, but she was. [laughs]

Ben: Oh, it’s just terrible to say. It just breaks my heart to say it. It’s really sad.

Andrew: Shut up. Ben, you’re so negative.

[Ben laughs]

Eric: Yeah, I think…

Andrew: Um… [pauses]

Eric: Yeah, continue. No, no, Andrew, please.

Andrew: Go ahead, Eric. Go ahead, Eric.

Eric: No, Andrew. Really.

Andrew: No, no, okay, fine.

Eric: No, Andrew. Go.

Andrew: Okay, if you insist.

Eric: Alright. Andrew, everybody!

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah, so I think Lavender was just basically a test dummy for Ron. His first [laughs] relationship couldn’t have been with Hermione. I don’t think it would have worked.

Eric: Well, she would have to…

John: It certainly wouldn’t have been…

Andrew: Natural?

John: It certainly wouldn’t have been the same kind of “make out with you in front of your little sister” kind of junk, like with Lavender. You would have never had that with Hermione. I think by the time he was done with Lavender, he figured out…

Laura: No!

John: …that’s not really the kind of girl I like.

Eric: Yeah. Yeah, Greg.

John: Yeah.

Laura: No, because Hermione expects more out of him. She expects him to be more mature and she expects a more mature relationship out of him. No one can go into that when they are sixteen.

John: Mhm.

Andrew: Yeah, and also, if you think about it, they’ve been friends for such a long time. I think it would be awkward at this point to have a relationship.

Eric: Well, at a previous point. I think it really brought out…See the thing with relationships, I think, in the books is that all of them…in fact, now that we’re mentioning this, all of them really taught the characters, like everybody, each one of the trio had a somewhat bad or different first relationship that didn’t last. Like, you know, Ron’s with Lavender taught him that he should, you know that snogging wasn’t everything. Hermione’s with Krum taught her that, maybe she doesn’t need to look for a star Quidditch player, you know? And maybe she doesn’t need to look for the sports guy who really isn’t particularly loquacious, or whatever the term was, you know? So, each one of their first relationships kind of taught them something about their future relationships and stuff.

John: I think that’s absolutely not the reason why she started being interested in Krum. I mean…

Ben: I completely agree. I think it’s that Krum…

John: …the Krum relationship was just…here’s this strange new guy coming…here’s this strange guy that’s, you know, paying attention to Hermione and she’s like, “What’s this all about? Some dude’s paying attention to me and he’s an older guy?”

Ben: Yeah, he’s the first guy that actually give her the time of day.

Laura: Yeah.

John: Yeah. Nothing to do with him being a sports star or anything. She’s not impressed by that stuff.

Eric: Well no, I thought that was her…

Ben: So, in other words, Eric, Eric, get off my show.

Laura: Well, she made it pretty clear in the book, you know, basically Krum noticed that she was a girl and Ron didn’t.

John: Yeah. Krum knew what was there. Did you see his face in that movie? She comes down the stairs and you see that little wink, that little nod of the head.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Well, I just thought…

John: He’s like “Yeah, boy!”

Ben: Oh yeah.

Eric: Book 4 was all about Hermione actually being more of a girl than she was before too, you know, with Krum and things. I don’t know. You’re right.


Ron’s Role in Book 7


Ben: How do you guys think Ron is going to do in Harry Potter 7? What’s his role going to be?

John: He’s going to die.

Andrew: You really think so? Or are you just being funny?

John: Actually, you know, yes and no. I…if it were a different kind of story, he probably would die. I don’t think she’s going kill him off.

Eric: Why do people have to die?

Laura: I think it’s possible.

Ben: Oh, it’s really possible?

Eric: Why do, you know, why does JKR have to kill these people off, you know? I’m really tired of this, you know?

Andrew: To make it an interesting plot.

Eric: No, it’s not an interesting plot, it’s a sucky plot. Every…

Micah: Dumbledore’s not dead anyway, we all know that.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Uh…no.

Ben: Okay, stop. Micah Tan, get off the crack.

Andrew: Don’t say “Micah Tan,” that’s my name for him.

John: Micah Tan? Are you tan, Micah?

Andrew: No. [Laughs]

Eric: All these hero stories are like, “everybody has to die” for the hero to appreciate life. Why can’t the hero just, you know…Why do they have to die to prove anything? What does that prove besides that drama happens in real life? You know, this is a fantasy story I don’t think she has to…

Ben: Actually, I heard Jo wrote it in there to make you mad, Eric.

Eric: I think…

Andrew: She wrote it in there so the kids…

John: [In a funny voice] I’ll get that Scull!

Eric: You know, I understand life has to be unfair and, you know, she should represent that if she is doing a book about anything, but at the same time, everybody’s like, “Who’s going die in the next book?” and “There’s going be more deaths.” But, what’s the point? Why do they really have to die? Honestly, couldn’t, you know?

Andrew: To make us cry.

John: I don’t like it becoming a gimmick.

Ben: It makes the book interesting.

Eric: I think it makes…

John: I think it’s…

Laura: Because it would be boring if people didn’t die.

Eric: But does everybody have to die? Does Ron have to die? Does Harry, you know? Everybody’s like…

Laura: No, not everyone has to die.

Andrew: We never said everyone.

John: Harry absolutely won’t die.

Laura: No.

John: There’s not a chance in hell that Harry will die.

Eric: But JKR is…

John: I can’t believe anybody is even entertaining the idea.

Eric: JKR is all like, you know, “More lives will have to be taken.” And, I’m thinking…

John: Well, that’s because they’re having an all-out war. That’s what happens.

Eric: I’m aware of that, and that’s fine. But, I mean, as far as main characters, why does she feel so compelled to keep killing people? Why is she so compelled to, you know, keep the death count up? You know? I mean I realize it has to happen in war.

Ben: But, the point is, she has to do it to keep the books interesting, as part of the series. Death is a part of real life, the series are life, and she’s trying to make it like real life, as analogous as possible. So, it’s just too bad – people die.

Eric: Then why don’t we have a drug addict in the books?

Ben: I’m sorry. Harry’s life’s rough.

Laura: Wait, Ben. Ben, I thought in real life, people didn’t run around with wands.

[Andrew laughs]

Eric: Thank you, Laura.

John: [Laughs] I wish.

Ben: Well, that’s true.

Eric: Laura is my homegirl.

Ben: I’m trying…no, you stole that from me from last week. Last week I said that. But, what I’m saying is that…

Eric: Laura is my homegirl.

Laura: No, really?

Ben: I’m saying that the setting that she’s trying to create. Like the concept of family and the concept of love…

Eric: Yeah, but not everybody’s family has to die for them to be heroes.

Ben: …concept of death…hate.

Eric: Not everybody’s family has to get blown to smithereens for them to…

Laura: No, not everyone’s family is dying.

Ben: We’re all going to die anyways. Eric, we’re all going to die anyways, dude.

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: Ben’s going die alone.

Ben: Why did, whoever…I am!

[Laura laughs]

Ben: I am going to die alone with my MuggleCast headset and my freakin’ Yellowcard CD. Yellowcard Lights and Sounds – in stores now. Go buy it.

[Everyone groans and laughs]

Eric: Okay, more on topic. What do we got?

Ben: Now, shifting roles…

Micah: But you guys…

John: I’m really confused. And I was trying to pay attention.

Eric: Micah was saying something…

Andrew: Me too.

John: I’m so confused.

Andrew: Eric, you confused us all again.

Eric: I’m sorry.


Rupert As Ron


Ben: Shifting gears to the movies, what do you think about Rupert Grint as Ron? [Imitates Ron] “I can’t think. Your hand’s all sweaty!”

[John laughs]

Eric: I think in the case of Rupert, it’s just, I’ve heard that he’s a very nervous person to meet on the red carpet. He’s very, you know, like, almost unsure of his answer. Like he’ll answers questions and things, but he doesn’t really handle it particularly well. And I’m thinking, you know, I can kind of relate to that, because, Rupert was, he had no acting experience and he auditioned for the role of Ron through Lizo and Newsround and he got the role. So, he’s like the…to me, he’s the fan who got to be part of the series. And you know, he’s really just a human person. And I think he has the right to be…to have these little tendencies – to be a little afraid, or a little nervous and anxious and I think it shows through with him more than it does anyone else. I think it’s just nerves as far as…I think…yeah…a little less of a…

Laura: Yeah. I agree.

John: You really can’t blame him either.

Eric: You really can’t. And I think he does well in interviews and stuff. Just not…on the red carpet events – he might be a little bit more…less…yeah.

Ben: Timid.

Andrew: Did he talk at all on the red carpet? I know he was like the first one to show up. But…

Eric: Which shows that he likes it, you know? He just really doesn’t really know… I mean he still goes.

Ben: You were there. Wouldn’t you know?

Andrew: No. It was a long line of press. You couldn’t see everyone and where they stopped, but I don’t know. John, did you see him stop at all?

John: I mean, I don’t even think we even got to interview him, did we?

Andrew: No, that’s my point.

John: I don’t know.

Andrew: I mean we didn’t get to interview Emma either, but she stopped. We saw her stop.

John: It’s obviously exhausting and they’ve just done the premiere the week before. I don’t know. I can’t pretend to get into their heads about how they actually feel.

Andrew: Yeah.

John: But you look at Dan and it’s almost like you’re thinking, “Wow, this kid is, you know, putting on a show for us even when he’s not acting in his movies.”

Andrew: Yeah.

John: How can somebody be that outgoing…

Andrew: Yeah.

John: …and always excited and into it? But, I talked to Melissa, who’s met him obviously a lot more than I have, and she swears that’s just the kind of kid he is. I think some people just have that naturally and some people have to either work for it or just, it’s just a lot more difficult for them. And that’s probably why Rupert stands out because it’s such a contrast between him and Radcliffe.

Eric: Him and Dan.

Andrew: Emma, too.

John: Yeah. Right.

Andrew: Although Emma’s more in-between Dan and Rupert. But this is not RedCast, this is MuggleCast.

[John laughs]

Eric: Yeah, yeah, right. No. Yeah, one final thing, just talking about Dan Radcliffe and the things he does because he’s “that kind of person” in contrast to Rupert. Did you guys see what he did for UTube? UTube, he was like…

Andrew: UTube.com, you’re talking about?

Eric: UTube.com. I’m actually plugging another site, yes.

Andrew: Yeah, what about it?

Eric: It’s Dan Radcliffe on a show called This Way Up, I think it is. And, it turns out he’s like…they joke about…it’s this show and they joke about…it’s this skit. And he actually has a side job as a police officer who loves the attention, and so he writes. It’s great stuff.

Ben: Yeah, I’ve seen that.

Eric: So, please, I just wanted to mention that. It’s like the funniest thing I’ve seen him do.

John: Oh.

Eric: But, I’m sorry, you know, this is like the fifth time I’ve taken the show off topic. Please by all means, back to Ron.

Ben: Yeah, okay well we’re quite a ways in now, so I think it’s time we moved on. Hey, yeah we definitely did.

Andrew: Did we cover him enough?

Ben: We’re forty minutes in. It’s time.

Andrew: Well, we were answering…

Ben: Yeah, wait a sec. Hold on a sec.

John: I thought we had a few more…about Ron…

[Everyone groans]

Eric: We had a little about him growing up as a Weasley…

Ben: Hey, John, John…

John: Are we running long?

Ben: Nah, let’s…we need to move on. We’re forty minutes in. Well, hold on, John, you think we should do voicemails now?

John: [Imitates Andrew] Yeah, yeah!

Andrew: [laughs] Shut up!

Ben: Well no, hold on. Andrew, hold on. John, are you sure?

John: [Imitates Andrew again] Ummm…Yeah, yeah alright! Yeah! Yeah! Let’s do voicemails.

Ben: Okay, I think that’s been settled.

John: [Still imitating] Yeah!

Ben: Well, that settles it, we’re doing the voicemails.

Eric: We never get tired of it.


Voicemails – Ron’s Skills


Andrew: Well, okay. Let’s do the voicemails.

Ben: We’re Steckless this week.

Eric: Steckless!

Ben: We’re Steckless this week again.

Eric: Actually…

John: How about we read the voicemails backwards in his honor?

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Backwards compatible.

Eric: Actually, I have something to report. Kevin Steck is, apparently, knee-deep in differential equations and digital logic homework right now.

Andrew: In other words, he’s a dork.

John: Oh my gosh!

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: First voicemail.

John: In other words, he’s smarter than all of us.

[Andrew laughs]

Eric: And he’s paying for it with his time.

Ben: Okay.

John: Yeah.

Ben: Roll the first voicemail.

[Audio]: Hi. This is Amy from Los Angeles and I really do enjoy your podcast. Since Ron is the topic this week, I wanted to ask you guys about, basically, his skills. It was pointed out over and over again that Ron is really good at chess, and although his magical abilities may not be as brilliant as others, do you think that Ron’s talent for strategy will play an important part in the seventh book and the final confrontation with Lord Voldemort? That’s it, thanks! Bye.

Andrew: Yes, absolutely, because…

Ben: Why?

Andrew: Well, obviously he’s going to be helping Harry and that’s all there is to it. If Ron gets with Harry, he will… Okay we haven’t seen much from him since Sorcerer’s Stone with the strategy like we saw all the way through the whole chess game.

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: But, that could be a good point that it does foreshadow what Micah is about to explain.

Ben: Micah Tan?

Micah: Yeah. It’s a good follow-up question. Do you guys think that what happened in Sorcerer’s Stone foreshadows Ron’s fate?

John: I was totally just thinking that, Micah. That blows my mind that you just said that.

Micah: We’re on the same wavelength.

John: I know. We’re totally in tune.

Eric: What about him getting…him sacrificing himself?

John: Naw, we’re totally in tune. I think there’s a…

Laura: I think it’s entirely possible.

John: There’s a theory…I forget where it’s published…about the whole chess game theory. How pretty much every move in that chess game is supposed to mirror something that’s going to happen…

Andrew: Oh, brother.

John: …in the battle. Yeah, it’s true.

Andrew: Oh, brother.

John: Actually, I’m a firm believer that she uses chess games as a foreshadowing device on more than one occasion, including in Order of the Phoenix when they are in the Order and they are playing a chess game and Ron is yelling at the chess pieces. He says something like, you know, “Take him, he’s a pawn, kill him,” or something. And right at that moment, the next words printed on that page is Snape coming into the room, randomly to talk about something. I think that’s a major foreshadow that Snape’s getting the axe in the last book. And he’s going do it in a sacrificial way.

Eric: Well, as long as he was a pawn for Dumbledore and not Voldemort. But no, I think that’s a good question – what Micah brought it up too. Will he sacrifice himself? I think it’s possible. But, the thing is, is he in a position to sacrifice himself? I think if anybody sacrifices himself to save Harry and his cause, I think it will be Neville.

John: Mhm.

Eric: I think Neville holds more importance as the one who was almost the Chosen One and that, if anybody really sacrifices himself and was able to be, you know, important enough to stop Voldemort or whatever they have to do to let Harry through, I think Neville would have to sacrifice himself before anything Ron did.

Laura: Yeah, but I could see Ron taking a bullet for Harry.

Eric: I can.

John: Yeah.

Eric: No, as a friend, I think it’s in his character. I don’t know about the series, if that will do anything though…if that will allow…what exactly Ron will be able to do that would stop Voldemort from doing something to Harry?

John: I mean, it would be more of a simple action than a complicated action that would involve magical complexities. It would just be jumping in front of a spell. Or, it could be something like he captures Ron or somebody and he’s like, “Tell me where Harry is!” and be like, “No! I’m not going to tell you where Harry is!” Like that. And “I’m going to kill you now,” then he’s like “Fine, kill me!” And then he dies and then next chapter.

Eric: Yeah, that’s over-published in sci-fi hero stories too. But…

Laura: Mhm. It’s true. [laughs]

John: I know.

Eric: You know? His strategy has been missing in the past books. It really has like, he’s this big strategy guy and all this stuff Harry basically plans his own war and attacks and that’s because, you know, he doesn’t let people in, but now that, seeing as he might let people in, do you think Ron will be able to help strategy-wise?

Laura: I don’t think Jo would have given him the talent if it weren’t going to have, you know, some sort of place in the book.

Eric: I like that. Well, it got them fifty points for Gryffindor.

John: Do you think it will help him with the hunt for the Horcri?

Ben: Hunt for the Horcri?

Eric: Let’s just not, no! Ben, Ben, don’t feed him. Ben, just don’t.

John: Figure out where they are?

Ben: No, hold on. John, you just figured out the title for Book 7.

John: The Hunt for the Horcri You know, I want to go and buy that domain right now.

Ben: Harry Potter and the Hunt for the Horcri.

[Everyone laughs]

John: I’m going to go to GoDaddy and I’m going to buy “Hunt for the Horcri” and I’m not going to put in the MuggleCast code.

Andrew: Use the code “MUGGLE”: M-U-G-G-L-E and save an additional ten percent off any order.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Yeah.

John: I’m going to type it in wrong on purpose.

Andrew: Use the code “RON” and save five dollars off any additional order. We have a lot of codes, I’m not even joking.

Ben: Guys, we have…

Eric: Really?

Andrew: Yes.

Ben: Guys, we have a lot of voicemails to get to though. So, I hope that was sufficient enough an answer, but it’s time to move on to the next one.


Voicemail – Weasley Magic


[Audio]: Hi, MuggleCasters. This is Jill calling from the University of Arizona in Tucson, and I have a question about Ron, my favorite character. In general, you guys seem to give Ron and the Weasley family a hard time. Especially last week when you said that the Weasley family wasn’t very good at magic. I see the Weasley family as having proven themselves time and time again throughout the series, especially as members of the Order. What would each of you like to see from them, specifically Ron, in the final book? Thanks, I really love your show. Talk to you later.

Andrew: When I said last…

Eric: You dug yourself a hole.

Andrew: No, I didn’t.

Eric: Hole.

Ben: Stop.

Andrew: Shut up, I still stand by what I said about…

Eric: Watch him dig himself out.

Andrew: …the Weasleys’ not being good at magic, but clever magic so to speak. Yes, Mrs. Weasley is great at it. Just like all the little things around their house.

John: What do you mean?

Andrew: You won’t see those things around the wizarding world anywhere else. I’m not saying Mrs. Weasley invented it, but she’s clever in that she can come up with little things, like, you know, that clock is priceless. Everyone loves the clock. I don’t know, I just…

John: Yeah.

Laura: I don’t think the Weasleys are entirely bad at magic. It said in Chamber of Secrets that their house was…

Andrew: Clever magic, not defensive magic.

Laura: Held stable by it. If they were bad at it, their house would have collapsed.

Eric: Mr. Weasley…

Andrew: I don’t know how many times I need to say this. You can’t assume stuff, when, you know…

Laura: Well, we haven’t really seen what kind of…no, no, no. I’m saying…no. What I’m saying again is that Ginny got them out of Umbridge – the whole situation with Umbridge in Order of the Phoenix. I don’t think they can be entirely bad at defensive magic if Ginny was able to get them out of that kind of situation where they were clearly the underdogs.

Ben: Well see, what the fans have to realize about Andrew is that he makes statements without any substance to make the statement. He says it without thought and goes spouting off…

Eric: No, no, no, no, no, no.

Ben: He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

Eric: Andrew is in this little hole, and he’s got this iShovel and he’s trying to dig himself… What I want to say is that I think the Weasleys are just a kind of people… Now we’ve seen, as Laura has pointed out, and with Fred and George too, they could hold their own in a battle and could defend themselves against whether it be Umbridge or even any kind of defense. But I think the Weasleys are just, what it is, is just they’re generally are the type of people that don’t use defensive magic or feel threatened by it. They’re well-mannered people and Arthur Weasley went and punched Lucius Malfoy before he wanted to use any magic against him, and I think just what we’re seeing in Book 6 with the whole Mollywobbles, you need to know the password to enter the Weasley house is how they’re really stooping to accept the hard times that lie ahead. And they are well-natured people who generally would use their magic and use their cleverness for things like the clock instead of things like defense. Like you don’t have to, when the flying car went to the Weasleys’ house, it didn’t have to be buzzed in and you didn‘t have to fingerprint scan or anything like that. That’s not the kind of people they are, so I just think that…it’s not that they can’t hold their own. They just have preferred not to accept the potential danger until they absolutely had to.

Ben: Thank you.

John: Who do you think would win in a fight: Lucius Malfoy or Arthur Weasley?

Ben: We did that last week.

John: What did you decide?

Laura: Yep.

Ben: We decided that…

Andrew: We decided that…

Ben: Actually Andrew, isn’t that when you made the comment about the Weasleys sucking at magic?

[John laughs]

Andrew: No, no, I said Arthur.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Arthur doesn’t do anything.

Eric: Yes, he does. He does the flying car.

Andrew: Oh my god. Oh, big deal! Flying car. Defensive!

John: I imagine he’s pretty good.

Andrew: Defensive! Defensive! We haven’t seen anything defensive out of him.

Eric: Yeah, but the flying car saved them from Aragog.

Andrew: That’s not defensive! That’s clever magic.

Eric: From Aragog, from Aragog. It saved them from Aragog.

John: No, here’s what it is, Andrew…

Ben: Okay, just because we haven’t seen it, doesn’t mean it doesn’t…

Laura: Well, you know what? Andrew.

Andrew: But you can’t assume this, that’s what I’m saying.

Laura: Andrew.

Eric: iShovel.

Ben: Well you can’t say they’re bad at magic, you can’t assume they’re bad either. So you’re contradicting yourself, Andrew.

Andrew: I’m not saying they’re bad. I’m not saying they’re bad. I take that back, okay?

Eric: The word of the day is: iShovel.

Ben: There you go flip-flopping again.

Andrew: I’m not flip-flopping. You know what, this is outrageous. No, no! No, no!

Laura: Okay, Andrew, I have a question for you.

Ben: Just leave.

Andrew: I’ll be back in a few minutes. You guys stress me out way too much.

Laura: No, no, shut up. Oh my god. Okay, here’s what I was going to ask…

Ben: Dude, dude.

Laura: …Andrew before he got up and left. Okay, I was going to ask: Do you think it‘s necessarily, I don’t know, essential that the Weasleys used defensive magic? I mean clever magic could get them out of a tight spot. You don’t always need to use defensive magic, I don‘t think.

John: There are clever forms of defensive and offensive magic especially if your offensive magic isn’t going to be unforgivable magic. But here’s what I think, what it boils down to. Any member of the Order of the Phoenix, any member of the first Order of the Phoenix implies they were in battles before in the first reign of – not the reign – but the first times of Voldemort. The fact that they’re still alive means they were obviously up to snuff enough, snuff enough, to battle…

Eric: Up to snuff enough.

[Eric and Laura laugh]

John: …with Death Eaters and to not get themselves killed.

Eric: You know, I like that.

Laura: Although, the Weasleys weren’t in the Order the first time.

Eric: Oh they weren’t?

John: Yeah they were, weren’t they? Weren’t they in the picture?

Laura: No, they weren’t.

Micah: No.

Laura: No. In Order of the Phoenix, Dumbledore said something like: “You weren’t in the Order last time, Molly.”

Eric: Ah, I think it was Hagrid.

Laura: Well somebody said that to her.

Eric: I think that was Hagrid.

John: Foiled again. Answer me this: If they weren’t in the first Order, which I’ll concede that they’re not, I’m just stupid when it comes to the books, I guess. Then how did they get involved with all these people like Lupin, and Mad-Eye, and Dumbledore?

Ben: They went to school together, maybe?

John: No, they weren’t in the same year. They weren’t Marauders. They weren’t…

Ben: It doesn’t matter, John.

John: They were like five or six years apart.

Eric: The thing is…

Ben: He’s worked at the Ministry of Magic.

Eric: They’re friends with Dumbledore.

John: But why are they involved other than the fact that it’s a story-telling thing? That Harry’s friends are people that relate to other people in the story.

Eric: Well, I think it’s that they’re all friends of Dumbledore. I think Dumbledore was the central, central character and he knew, he was in contact with Sirius Black after Prisoner of Azkaban, and he was always in contact with Hagrid – he let him stay on. And he was always helping Remus out throughout his life, and so I think it’s just a matter of Dumbledore, when he needed people, he was able to pull them together because they were all friends with him. And I think it was really him who they all shared a friendship with. When they first met each other, I don’t know when it was, but they can all relate through Dumbledore. And so, even by nature, if Dumbledore likes them, the people would get along well together. And…

Micah: Or what about Harry even?

Laura: Yeah.

Micah: I mean, they’re the main protectors of him now. So, it’s possible that they were brought into the Order for protection themselves.

Eric: Which is true.

John: I mean, it makes sense now that Harry’s involved but I guess, did they associate with each other before Harry came along?

Eric: It’s really a question, yeah, that, too. And also, would they even… Harry and Ron would have had to meet if his family was in the Order, you know? If Ron’s family… I don’t really see how Ron and Harry couldn’t be friends if their, or couldn’t at least be incredibly aware of each other with how intertwined their families are. I mean, that’s a valid point.

Laura: Yeah. Well, I think I said this in an earlier episode as well, but I think part of the reason the Weasleys became part of the Order was that because Molly’s brothers were killed in the first war by Death Eaters.

Eric: Gideon and Fabian Prewett.

Laura: Yep.

Eric: Wow, that was my JK Rowling moment right there. I was like, “Wow, trivia.”


Voicemail – Amortentia


[Audio]: Hey guys, this is K’lyssa from MuggleNet.com and Texas. Okay, so I’ve been thinking of a way to force you all to let me on the show for a while now, and then I thought of something I’ve always wondered about. Everyone always asks what your Patronus would be, or what your Boggart would be, but no one’s ever asked about Amortentia. Amortentia is, as you probably know, the most powerful love potion mentioned in the Half-Blood Prince. And it said it smelled differently to each person with what they like. So, what would it smell like to all of you? That’s my question and I’ll talk to you guys later. Bye.

[Laura laughing]

John: No, that’s fun.

Eric: How do I…

Laura: I don’t know what it would smell like.

Andrew: Is this a voicemail question?

Laura: I don’t walk up to people I like and sniff them.

Eric: Yeah. [laughs] K’lyssa sent in a voicemail.

John: You don’t understand. It’s suppose to smell like your favorite things.

Ben: Yeah.

John: Like to Harry it smelled like Quidditch and grass, and crap.

Ben: No. No, it smelled like Ginny, man.

John: Yeah, Harry’s is going to smell like grass and a locker room apparently.

Andrew: Mine would smell like the Listener’s Challenge this week because I’m in love with this week’s Listener’s Challenge.

Eric: [Laughs] So, I guess that means we have to play the voicemail because you want to have that in.

Ben: We’ll get to that later, Andrew.

Andrew: But thanks, K’lyssa.

Ben: I already played it, dude, you missed it. Thanks, K’lyssa.

Eric: K’lyssa totally pulled an Izzy there.


Voicemail – Weasley Magic


[Audio]: Hi MuggleCast. My name is Allison, I’m 14, and I’m from La Porte, Indiana. That’s near Chicago. And I have a comment slash question about Ron Weasley. I read in a book, and I think you guys mentioned something about it, that JK Rowling was greatly inspired by Hamlet and especially the idea of somebody dying for who they love. So, do you think Ron will die in the next book to save Hermione? I think you guys mentioned it and I know I read about it in Muggles and Magic, and I was wondering what you think. Thanks. And I’m a big Bemma shipper. Bye.

Ben: Hey, Allison. Do you know Emerson? He lives right down the road. I know his address. If you send me an email, I’ll send you an email back with his address. But often times, he goes to the YMCA, you know where the Y is, and he also can be seen at Little Caesar’s Pizza – I’ve been there before. I’ve been in that Little Caesar’s. I’ve bought breadsticks there, but that’s besides the point. They were very good breadsticks. [laughs] So…

John: Little Caesar’s is not interesting…

Eric: Even if I take the show off topic, I think breadsticks is just…you know, that’s the line.

[Eric and Laura laugh]

Ben: Oh, be quiet, Eric. Be quiet.

Laura: That’s going to be on an avatar soon.

Ben: Do you guys think – okay, who’s going to die for someone they love? That’s the question. Will Ron die to save Hermione?

John: Well, that’s why everybody is dying. That is why everybody is dying.

Eric: Everyone is dying for the ones they loves.

Ben: That is true.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: But I think they mean any one of the cases. Like you take, uh, like you step in the way. Sort of like a Secret Service agent who will step in the way of a bullet to save the President.

Andrew: Well, sort of like the MuggleNet poll.

John: Yeah.

Andrew: Would you take a bullet for JKR in order to save Book 7?

Eric: I got a lot of captions for that. That was really great.

Andrew: Would you? I wouldn’t.

Eric: I wouldn’t.

[Andrew Laughs]

Andrew: No!

Ben: Cause you wouldn’t get to read it. What would be the point?

Eric: The end has already been written.

Andrew: Either way.

Laura: Either way.

Eric: The end is already written, so, I don’t know. That’s a big factor if it weren’t already.

John: Would it be published?

Andrew: Yeah, I’ll never be able to talk about that.

Eric: No, no, no.

Laura: Yeah, I don’t know.

Eric: Let’s stick to Ron. Stick to Ron.

Laura: That’s dangerous territory. [laughs]

Andrew: Although it would be a good topic.

John: I heard Scholastic gives her incredible health insurance, so she is going to be all set. Lord knows she couldn’t afford it otherwise.

Eric: Do you think she’ll get frozen?

Andrew: She probably has a clone waiting for her.

Ben: Okay, guys.

Andrew: It doesn’t matter.

Ben: We’re talking about Ron. Will Ron die in the next book to save Hermione?

Eric: He…he…

Ben: I don’t know. I’m not…

John: The trio’s not dying. Period.

Ben: Actually, I think we’ll lose a third of the trio.

Eric: John, are you really against Harry dying?

John: I just know it’s not going to happen. I’m just a realist here, you guys. That’s all.

Eric: Really? I think it’s interesting.

Laura: I don’t think Harry is going to die either.

John: Well, obviously Harry’s not going to die.

Ben: Ron’s going to die, guys. [laughs]

Eric: So then you could have Emma.

[Everyone laughs]

John: If Harry… This is what’s going happen. If Harry or any of the trio dies, Jo is going to get served with so many lawsuits from so many organizations all around the world paying all of their kids’ anti-depressant medicines, because they’re all going to be so devastated she’s going to lose her entire fortune to lawsuits.

Andrew: Yeah, think, like, all the merchandise, like you have these –

John: Yeah, who’s going want to buy stuff?

Andrew: Yeah, you have like all these dolls and you’re like, “Oh, he’s dead now.”

John: Buy your Harry Potter action figure. He comes in a black suit for mourning.

[Everyone laughing]

Eric: No, the Lego. Ron’s Funeral Scene.

John: Hermione comes in a very flattering black veil.

[Everyone Laughing]

Ben: Oh, come on John. That’s terrible.

John: That’s terrible.

Eric: It is terrible.

Andrew: No, but it’d be true. Who would want to buy that?

John: I know, nobody would!

Eric: But it’s one thing when you’re reading about Sirius and you’re thinking, “Oh, well he’ll be dead in a few books,” that’s sad. And when you read about Dumbledore, yeah, that’s sad. But Dumbledore’s so entertaining that you can still read him and not be too upset. And you know, you still hope he died with good intentions. But if Ron dies…

Andrew: Mhm.

Eric: I think the majority of the people are really going to be a little bit more upset because he shows up so much more in the books, you know, as far as the Trio goes. It’s just like killing your best friends and what John said about the anti-depressant medicine, I agree with that.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: I would sue her.

John: I mean people are already going to be depressed with the end of the books, period.

Laura: Well, I think if anyone out of the Trio… Well…

John: People are going to go through the postpartum depression, but there’s also a big difference…

Laura: I think that if anyone does die in the Trio, it’ll be Ron.

John: Well, I agree with you. If anyone dies in the Trio, it could be Ron, but I think that there’s a very big distinction between the death of somebody who is more or less your elder than one of your contemporaries.

Laura: Oh, yeah, of course.

John: And Cedric dying was probably, arguably, one of the most traumatic deaths he’s had to go through because it was someone closer to his age. And he wasn’t even really good friends with the kid, he was kind of a prick.

Ben: And it happened like two feet away from him.

John: Yeah, but I mean, if it was one of his best friends…

Eric: I think he would be devastated.

John: It’s like, how could you even celebrate vanquishing Voldemort?

Eric: Maybe he couldn’t. Maybe that’s…

Ben: That’s true. I mean, especially if everyone gets wiped out except him. He wouldn’t have anyone to celebrate it with, so…

John: I mean, granted, he’ll have…

Laura: I’m not sure Harry’s going to celebrate it, though.

Eric: I don’t think he’ll celebrate anyways.

Laura: I mean, it’s not like he’s going to kill Voldemort and then…

John: Yeah, they’re not going to go drink Firewhiskey in the common room or anything.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: No, dude, there’ll be a big kegger.

Andrew: It’s going to be reflection time.

Eric: Just to say one of the things about Harry. You know, about him dying and stuff. I think it’s possible, but at the same time, he is the Boy That Lived. We might have brought that up before. He’s the Boy Who Lived only to get killed, you know, 17-18 years later by the same guy. I don’t think that’s going to happen.

John: Yeah.

Eric: You know, he is the Boy Who Lived so if you only live to die then that would be pointless and it would say something about evil. But…yeah.

John: That’s Donnie Darko.

Eric: Yeah.


Dueling Club


Ben: Everyone, it’s time for everyone’s favorite segment: The Dueling Club. This week, I don’t know who we have. Well, who cares, who cares?

John: Soon to be featured on PotterCast with a different name.

[Everyone laughing]

Eric: PotterCast…no…PotterCast, they would never steal our segments!

Andrew: [coughs] Essays.

Ben: They steal about twelve of these segments of ours.

John: I know, well…you guys are more than welcome to borrow our “Extendable Ears” segments if you knew anybody famous enough to talk to. [Makes an “ohhh” noise]

Andrew: We do. We just don’t need them. We are the talent. We are the stars.

John: Oh, I forgot.

Eric: We don’t need famous people. Yeah, we are the famous people.

[Laura laughs]

John: You just interviewed somebody who was almost Luna Lovegood. I remember.

Ben: John, John.

[Eric laughs]

John: Well, that was close. I haven’t listened to it yet. I’m sure…

Ben: Hey, John, John. I remember all the work you did to establish the interviews. It was all you, wasn’t it?

John: Are you kidding me? It was actually…they call me first and then I give the calls to Melissa.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Oh yeah.

Ben: Yeah.

Eric: It’s true.

Andrew: But bottom line is: We are the talent. We are the stars. We don’t need acts coming on.

John: I haven’t, I haven’t had this much fun recording anything ever. I haven’t had this much fun period since breakfast.

[Everyone laughing]

Andrew: Since breakfast?

Eric: Why? What happened at breakfast? Did you have Captain Crunch?

John: I found this really cool baseball card at the bottom. And it was holographic.

[Everyone Laughing]

Ben: Okay, Micah Tan, who’s dueling?

Micah: I guess…let’s do, uh, Trelawney vs. Luna. The battle of whack jobs. [laughs]

Ben: Haven’t we already done that?

[Everyone laughing]

Micah: No, we did it another time, but we cut it out, didn’t we? And we moved it to this one.

Ben: How about Ron vs. Bon Jovi? I mean, Ron vs. Seamus.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Who would win?

Laura: Probably Ron.

Ben: Ron, because we haven’t seen enough of Seamus.

Eric: But I think Seamus holds his own in certain ways, like against Harry and stuff, but, I don’t know, Seamus lets his mom control him a little bit more than Ron would.

John: Was Seamus even in the DA for any length of time?

Eric: I forget.

John: Because at least Ron’s been in the DA and actually learned stuff.

Ben: Wasn’t he reluctant to join? He was reluctant to join right?

Laura: Yeah, he was. He came to, like, one, I think. I think he came to one DA lesson.

Eric: But he hasn’t rotted him out.

John: Anybody in the DA vs. anybody not in the DA is going get…is going win. It’s not like they’ve learned anything of value from any of their DADA teachers.

Eric: That’s true.

Ben: True dat, true dat.

Eric: Though I guess we now have to call you Umbridge.

Ben: Ladies… Hey, hey, Andrew.

John: Is this thing usually this boring, this segment? I was all excited. It’s called Dueling Club.

Eric: Yeah. Andrew’s like: “The exciting, that was another exciting episode of…”

[Everyone laughing]

Eric: And it was like… Last week’s was good.

Andrew: Yeah, last week’s was good.


Spy on Bon Jovi


Ben: Andrew, Andrew, Andrew I just want to tell you…

Andrew: What, what?

Ben: [Sings] It’s my life. It’s now or never. I ain’t going to live forever!

Eric: [Joins in singing] It’s now or never. I ain’t going to live forever! I’m going to live while I’m alive.

Andrew: Oh, Ben. You “Have A Nice Day.”

Ben: Andrew, it’s time for Spy on Spartz. We’re sick of Spy on Spartz.

Andrew: Let me intro this the right way. Ummm, often PotterCast always has these celebrities on their show that, like, they like to call them stars of Harry Potter or whatever…

John: That’s over-rated.

Andrew: But screw Harry Potter

John: Ooo!

Andrew: What about rock stars? This is what MuggleCast is about. You hear our opening and closing music, okay? So this is why…[laughs]…we are very proud and excited to bring to you: Spy on Bon Jovi.

John: The hippest rock star of our day.

Andrew: Micah, take it away.

[Micah laughs]

John: He was just on TRL. I saw him yesterday.

Andrew: Micah Tan, set us up and take it away!

Micah: Bon Jovi is…this is so bad! [laughs]

Andrew: No!

John: What’s he wearing, Micah?

[Everyone laughing]

Andrew: No, it’s not! It’s beautiful!

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: No. No, no, no.

Micah: Here, why don’t you set it up?

Andrew: I’ll set it up. So, Micah Tan is very high up in the football world. He works in the AFL. He’s in a multi-billion dollar contract.

John: Damn, Micah.

Andrew: This guy is rich, okay? I’m like…it’s just outrageous.

Eric: We have to call Micah “Moneybags.” Moneybags Tannenbaum.

[Everyone laughing]

Andrew: [laughs] Ummm, so Micah… So, today Micah was Bon Jovi’s personal…what was it? What were you doing?

Eric: Bodyguard?

Micah: Escorting him around. I mean it wasn’t that hard…

John: You were his escort?

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Escorting him around New York City.

Ben: He was Bon Jovi’s male escort.

[Everyone still laughing]

Andrew: He was an escort. He told me he had shades on, he was…

John: That is hot, Micah!

Andrew: So you asked him about Harry Potter and podcasting and all that. What’d he say?

Micah: I did. He actually heard about John Noe’s incident last week. He asked me…

John: No kidding! Wow!

Micah: Yeah! He asked me how you were doing, he wanted to make sure you were alright, and, you know, if anything that he could do for you to give him a call, John.

John: Awww. He’s a very considerate man, that guy.

Eric: Assuming John can get the number.

Andrew: Yeah, that is nice.

John: Are you kidding me? I’ve got everybody’s number.

Andrew: That is nice.

[Eric laughs]

Ben: Micah was his escort.

John: Oh, Micah…

Ben: Micah probably has his number.

[Andrew and Eric laugh]

John: How did that turn out? [laughs]

Andrew: Bon Jovi gave it to him…. [laughs]

Eric: “If you ever need anything…”

Andrew: “Hey, here’s my number.” [laughs] I’m just kidding, I’m just kidding.

John: Micah, Micah- did you transcribe the encounter?

Ben: Well, one of the problems you guys had with the Spy on Spartz is it was way too long and it was ridiculous. So, I think Spy on Bon Jovi’s over this week. Next week, we’ll spy on your favorite celebrity.

John: Oh!

Ben: It may even be you. Actually, actually, I think we’re doing Bono next week.

Andrew: Rock celebrity.

Ben: Ciaran lives down the road from him. We’re doing Bono.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Wait! This is outrageous. We have all these connections!

Ben: Yeah, really. We’ve got the connections.

Andrew: Who are we kidding? What’s this Emerson? [laughs] We’ve got a rock star. [laughs] We got the rock stars.

[Phone starts ringing]

Eric: Who’s getting called?

Andrew: We’ve got the rock stars! Oh no. [laughs]

[Everyone laughs]

John: Who are we spying on?

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: Who’s calling who? [laughs] No.

[Phone is picked up]

Emerson: [on the phone] Hello?

John: Hey, who’s this?

Emerson: Emerson.

[Micah laughs]

John: Emerson! What are you doing right now?

Emerson: Actually, I’m in the middle of a power hour.

John: You’re doing what?

Emerson: A power hour.

John: Oh, what’s that mean for our G-rated audience?

[Micah and Ben laugh]

Emerson: Uh… it’s where we drink a lot of, like, water to stay healthy…

John: Oh!

Emerson: …and, ummm, it’s that we watch movies and stuff. You know, we’re just chilling out basically.

[Andrew laughs]

John: Now tell me, are you with your new girlfriend right now?

Emerson: I am not.

John: Are you with the girl who’s almost your girlfriend right now?

Emerson: I am not.

[Andrew laughs]

John: Awww, nuts. And why is that?

Emerson: Because she’s actually been asleep for about the past five hours.

[Andrew laughs]

John: Well, that’s cool. Well, we just wanted to see what you were up to.

Micah: Tell him he’s been kicked to the curb for Bon Jovi.

[Andrew laughs]

Emerson: Is this going to be on, uh…

Andrew: We’re not going use it, tell him.

Emerson: …you’re recording?

John: Yeah.

Micah: Yeah.

John: But you won’t, you won’t say anything inappropriate. Oh, that was weird. Well, I don’t want to interrupt your power hour or else you’re going to have to add more minutes on.

[Micah laughs]

Emerson: Oh, yes. I’ll think of a cool song and just have another shot of water.

John: And we know how poorly you handle your water.

[Andrew and Ben laugh]

Emerson: Right, yes. That water just…

Eric: Yes, Emerson takes his water very seriously.

John: All right, dude.

[Andrew laughs]

Emerson: All right.

John: We’ll see you later, dude.

Andrew: [laughs] We, we… No. Here’s what we need to do. We need to just call him and say…

John: And that was Spy on Spartz à la PotterCast.


Andrew’s Listener Challenge


Ben: Hey Andrew! Tell me, is the Listener Challenge back this week?

Andrew: Oh my god, it is back. And with a vengeance.

Eric: Wooo, Betty!

Andrew: So we’ve been off… and I don’t know! This just came to me. I was like, “Jesus!”

Ben: This is the mother- THE MOTHER- of all listener challenges.

Eric: Andrew praised Jesus. He was like, “…Jesus.”

Andrew: So, let’s just jump into it. This is a Listener Challenge and a contest. It is the Design a MuggleCast Segment Contest where YOU will be able to make your very own MuggleCast segment that will be aired on [laughs] MuggleCast!

So, basic details: You create your own MuggleCast segment to be ran on our show. You plan your segment, you gather your content, you assign your hosts, you gather the hosts, you get your friends together and all that. And then you record the show, and then you edit it all together. You do everything! And then you send it to us.

The judging will be based on creativity of the topic, the presentation, and the personalities of the hosts. And the winner…

Ben: But, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.

Andrew: …will have your segment aired [realizes Ben was trying to talk] What? What, what, what?

Ben: So, about the host personalities. So, in other words, you don’t want people like Andrew on there.

Andrew: You just can’t be boring, that’s what I’m saying. [laughs]

John: Ohhh.

Andrew: Just go through iTunes and look at random podcasts and you’ll see what I mean. You have to have a good personality.

Ben: So, don’t listen…

Andrew: Don’t be like us.

Ben: Yeah. Don’t listen to PotterCast.

John: Ohhh, snap.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Ben: Don’t go there for examples.

John: And here I was just ready to work on my submission…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: So, winners will have their segment aired on MuggleCast, and all the participating hosts will win an up and coming MuggleCast product that will probably be…

Ben: Debuting.

Andrew: That we will probably be announcing – yeah, that too…

John: Ooo!

Andrew: …next week.

John: What do you got – coasters, bottle coolers?

Andrew: Yeah, we’ve got coasters, napkins, party hats…

Ben: Toilet paper.

John: Toilet paper with Andrew’s face on every sheet.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: It’s Bemma’s, it’s Bemma toilet paper.

Andrew: [Laughs] Wait, let’s get through this. The rules. Your segment must be no longer than seven minutes in length.

John: The magic number seven!

Andrew: The topic must relate – [responding to John] You know that, I didn’t even think of that! The topic must relate to the Harry Potter books, movies, fan culture, or anything else if related to Harry Potter. So it can’t be on, like, you know, quadratic formulas or whatever.

John: That’d be awesome!

Ben: Kevin’s already made it. He’s already working on it. He’s like…

[Someone laughs]

Ben: …he’s like, [imitates Kevin] here’s how you solve a differential equation.

Eric: Ummm yeah, John Noe.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: [Still imitating Kevin] The opposite of b plus or minus the square root of b squared minus four a c all over two a.

Andrew: [laughs] Okay, let’s get through this please, people!

Ben: Sorry.

Andrew: Now here’s the kicker: John, listen up. You cannot use someone to host who is in association [laughs] with a Harry Potter podcast website.

[John sighs]

Andrew: And I say this because I don’t want… we don’t want…

Ben: iMuggle.

Andrew: …some Harry Potter website trying to do this just to get… no, iMuggle’s a good podcast.

Ben: Or the Harmony Podcast.

John: I love the Harmony Podcast!

Andrew: iMuggle’s good. I’m going to call John out on iMuggle in a few minutes.

John: Ohhh.

Andrew: And the deadline. Your segment must be turned in no later than February 18th, at 11:59 PM Eastern Standard time. Now, for more information on sending the file to us because some of them will be pretty big and you might not be able to do it on email…

Eric: Andrew, tell them…

Ben: Please compress it to an mp3.

Andrew: …visit MuggleCast.com.

Ben: Please compress it to mp3.

Andrew: Yeah, it has to be an mp3. Right. We’re going to have the entire list of rules up on MuggleCast.com. And then, additionally, the winners will be announced and then their segment will be aired on the weekend of February 26th. Which will be the show closest to that date.

Eric: Andrew, I have one quick question.

Andrew: [clears throat] Yes.

Eric: What’s the difference between…I’ve noticed, well, I mean there’s… Basically, if you look at our fans, there’s a lot of… I think it’s about 10 to 15 different fancasts out there right now. So what… yeah, yeah.

Andrew: Yeah. They’re all rip-offs… so what’s your point?

Eric: So when you say that, besides that, when you say they can’t be anybody in association with a Harry Potter podcast or website, I… You know? Where’s the differentiation between our fans and…? Because I think every, well like a lot of our fans on the fan listing and things like that have all done or been a part of a podcast. So can they send the stuff in? A lot of them, a big majority, have done…

Andrew: Not really. Not really. [laughs]

Eric: …the MuggleCast Fan Cast Chat and a bunch of other stuff.

Andrew: Oh…

Eric: Yeah. So can…

Andrew: Okay. We’ll change it.

John: Here comes Andrew’s blanket insult on all Harry Potter fan podcasts.

[Laura and Andrew laugh]

Andrew: No, no, no, no. No. Anyone…

Eric: Do you want another iShovel?

Andrew: This is open to anyone, but…

[John laughs]

Andrew: This isn’t to have your show promoted or anything.

Eric: He needs an iDozer.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: That’s what I’m saying. Okay?

Micah: So, MuggleNet Greg, you’re safe. You can do it.

Andrew: Now… yeah.

John: I can’t wait until the winning submission is this mystery voice that you later find out was me all along.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: We’re going to run some checks on the files to make sure.

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: Now, segments from runners-up will be considered for airing in future episodes because people are going to put a lot of time into this.

John: Yup.

Andrew: So, you should be recognized, unless it’s complete crap.

[Micah and Eric laugh]

John: Here’s the translation of the Listener Challenge: MuggleCast is having a hard time filling up the show with interesting content…

[Eric, Laura and Andrew laugh]

John: …and because they have no imaginations to think up a new segment, this is where you all come in.

Andrew: Yes!

Ben: Exactly.

[Everyone laugh]

Andrew: Now hold on a second, John. I beg to differ. Spy on Bon Jovi, Andrew’s Listener Challenge…

Ben: Ben’s Top Ten List…

Eric: Advice with MuggleCast…

[John laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] This is all original quality content!

John: [still laughing] I forgot about that one! Oh, that was fun!

Andrew: Am I good or am I good right now, Noe? That is not a rip-off your [in a mock impressed voice] “Live Call-In Show”. It doesn’t even relate to it!

John: I didn’t even bring it up!

Andrew: The Advice with MuggleCast…

John: I didn’t even bring that up, but it’s funny how soon that entered your mind!

Andrew: Yeah, but you and Melissa…

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: …because Melissa hasn’t got off my butt about that, and you probably won’t, too!

John: Ugh!!! I heard next week’s challenge is Micah’s idea. Micah says, “Hey! For this week’s fan challenge, let’s see how you would transcribe MuggleCast!”

[Everyone laughs]

John: And then they come piling in and Micah kicks his feet up on the desk…

Micah: Good.

Eric: [Laughs] Oh my god.

John: …and drinks a limonada.

Ben: No, no, no, no…

Andrew: This is going to be a one-time thing; we’re not going to make the segments into “Oh hey, could you do this every week for us?”

Ben: …then Micah’s next fan challenge would be, [imitates Micah’s deep voice] “Let’s see how you would do the news.”

Andrew: No, we’ve got… the show that we’ve got right now is kickin’.

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: What?

Ben: Pretty soon… well actually, no, no, no, no! No!

Eric: We don’t use our fans.

Ben: No, we’re going to progress, and eventually we’re going to have one… Like episode 30, it’s going to be 30 seconds long…or two minutes long, and it’s going to be Andrew’s Listener Challenge. And the new challenge is to create an episode of MuggleCast.

[Ben and Andrew laugh]

John: Oh cool!

Ben: And we’ll just air those from here on out.

Andrew: Uhhh… way to sound like you’re lazy.

Eric: Anyway…

Andrew: But anyway. So, good luck. I think everyone will enjoy this. This is another quality contest brought to you by MuggleCast.com.

Eric: Oh my.

Andrew: [laughs] Your Harry Potter podcast.

John: Oh geez…

Ben: Oh, funny.

Andrew: Enter the code MUGGLE! That’s M-U-G-G-L-E.

Ben: I’m going to throw up.

[Everyone laughs]

John: I’m peeking at my famed recording because of you.

[Everyone laughs again]

John: Oh, you know, all you MuggleCast listeners are just itching to start and buy domain names. I know it.

Andrew: No, this is a… no! You’d be surprised. You’d be surprised.

John: Yes, this is the most brilliant demographic.

Andrew: We’ve made a lot of… we’ve had a lot of customers.

John: Oh! Ten out of 60,000 is like a ridiculously good percentage.

Ben: We’ve made a lot of, ummm….

Andrew: [laughs] It’s not ten, shut up.

Eric: I haven’t gotten any cookies out of you, Ben.

[Micah, John and Laura laugh]

Ben: Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen.

Andrew: This show has turned into a joke.

Ben: Everyone, everyone.

John: I will say this is probably my favorite episode of MuggleCast.

Eric: Yeah, mine too.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: We’ll see how it turns out with your editing.

Ben: Why, thank you. It’s the only one you’ll listen to.

John: Awww, no.

Ben: Well, guys and gals. This wraps up episode… is this 25?

Andrew: Yeah, it’s 25.

Micah: Yeah!

Laura: Yeah.

John: I thought it was 24!

Andrew: No, it’s 25.

Ben: No, it’s 25, be quiet.

John: Oh, that’s right.

Laura: It’s 25.

Ben: 25 episodes. We’re halfway to 50. Guys, this is our silver.

Eric: This is our silver show. [fake crying voice] Oh my gosh!

Andrew: Actually I think we should just skip to 100 right from here.

John: No, because see by the time you get to 50, we’ll be on 50.

Andrew: What?

Ben: Yeah, because you’re trying to…

John: We’re going to release a bonus episode so we can be 50/50.

Ben: Once again, the Leaky policy of one-upping.

[Everyone laughs]

John: No. If we wanted to one-up you, we’d be at 51 while you were at 50.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Funny, funny, funny. Well, everyone. MuggleNet Greg, thank you for joining us. We really enjoyed your company this week. Hopefully you’ll come back again.

John: Well, you’re going to have to…

Ben: Did you guys like Mugglenet Greg?

John: You’re going to have to invite Mugglenet Greg back.

Andrew: Yeah, thanks, Hot Pants.

John: Don’t you…

Ben: He’s a hottie.

John: For calling me Hot pants, you have to give me my 15 seconds.


iMuggle


Andrew: Oh, oh, John. Can I have a minute with you real quick? We’re going to cut a lot of this out anyway. Well, except for this part.

John: What?

Andrew: What is… I was listening to PotterCast earlier today. What is…

John: Yes?

Andrew: Why do you hate iMuggle? What’s the problem with them?

John: I’ve never even heard, I’ve heard of the show before, but….

Andrew: Yeah.

John: I’ve heard good things. I can only imagine that some portion of the MuggleCast Fan Chat is involved with the project.

Andrew: I don’t know, I just feel like… you’re making fun of it. I… I… Ugh.

John: No. Well here’s the story.

Andrew: What?

John: Here’s my thing about iMuggle, okay?

Andrew: Okay.

John: The thing about iMuggle is this. In about three or four days, Leaky is going to revamp the entire website. And then iMuggle emailed me this thing about their show and they said that they heard that Leaky was going to be introducing a bunch of new features and a whole new lots of things.

Andrew: Hmmm.

John: And then iMuggle said that they want me to listen to their episode. Then I said, “That’s fine.” I heard you’re a great show and just for being… listening to your show, I’ll let you know to visit LeakyNews.com instead of the old stupid web address.

Andrew: Mhm.

John: And then, and they gave me a high-five and said that MuggleCast was cool for letting me just say that.

Andrew: I don’t get it. What’s your point? [laughs]

John: My point is that I love…

Ben: He’s just used us as a shameless plug is what he’s saying.

John: …I love iMuggle is what I’m saying.

Andrew: I think you’re just jealous that your podcast doesn’t have its own fan podcast. [laughs]

John: Is that what that is?

Eric: And we have like fifteen of them, we’ve got 15 of those…

Andrew: You’ve never listened to it?

Eric: …fan podcasts.

Andrew: They… No, that’s not true, Eric. They sit there and they discuss MuggleCast! [laughs] It’s awesome!

John: I’ll be gosh-darned.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: It’s kind of weird.

[Laura laughs]

John: You know, if anything, I regret that our audience is comprised of people who either work or, you know…

Andrew: [Laughs] They have, like…

John: …do things with themselves other than sit around with their hands in their pants and making podcasts.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, okay, you say that. And then we listen to PotterCast and here’s these professionally produced songs.

Ben: You hear the fifty-year-olds.

John: I know.

Ben: Yeah.

John: I know.

Ben: There’s these fifty-year-olds…

Eric: Yeah, John, John…

Ben: …like Melissa, John…

[John laughs]

Eric: …your adult listeners work and when they get back from work, they go into the MuggleCast fan chat.

Andrew: [laughs] And they hang out with people there.

John: Yeah, that’s… you know?

Ben: [laughs] Yeah, that’s what happens.

John: We don’t go in there. Are you kidding me?

Andrew: Oh please!

Eric: You and Melissa are both in there a lot.

Ben: I’ve seen them in there, dude.

Andrew: And you, Eric.

John: The Leaky Lounge is the most intelligent of all lounges online, I believe. You know? It’s true.

Eric: Can we end this show?

Ben: Well, guys.

Andrew: No. You’re not putting that in.

Eric: He’s messed up?


Show Close


Ben: Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys. This has been a wonderful show; I have enjoyed it immensely. Ladies and gentlemen, before we go, I must say.

[Andrew and John laugh]

Ben: YellowCard’s Lights and Sounds comes out this week. Go purchase it.

Laura: Ughhh! NO! Nooo!

Ben: And visit BenSchoen.com, and EmmaWatson.us and MuggleNet.com and MuggleCast.com for much fun.

John: Yeah, since when do you have a Muggle – an Emma Watson website?

Eric: Okay, okay.

Ben: Since forever, man.

John: So, that night…

Ben: Who’s better than me?

[Long pause]

Ben: Hey, John. Hey, John. Who’s better than me? No one’s better than me.

John: So that night you wanted me to make an Emma Watson layout just for fun, you were going to use that for your own website and not tell me?

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Yeah. I’m dead serious.

John: You little jerk!

[Eric, Ben, and Laura laugh]

Ben: Okay, guys. Guys. I am Ben Schoen.

Eric: I’m Eric Scull.

Andrew: I’m…

Eric: …but if I were a MuggleCast mix, I’d be at MuggleCast.com.

[Everyone laughs, but John laughs the hardest]

John: Ha, ha, ha!

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson. [laughs]

Micah: I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Eric: I’d be too cool for iTunes.

John: I’m MuggleNet Greg. MuggleNet Greg also known as John from PotterCast.

Andrew: Thank you.

Ben: Well guys, stay around…

Laura: Yay for Greg!

Ben: …stay around after this recording for a little bit of the post-show.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: You get the pre-show earlier, and now you get the post-show.

Eric: We didn’t release the other post-show.

John: Is this like Oprah?

Ben: I don’t know.

[Show ending music starts]

John: Is this going to be on Oxygen?

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: I don’t know if we ever actually released the footage for the pre-show.

Eric: Or the post-show.

Andrew: Oh, I have that. Are we going put that in?

John: The post-show is Ben with his shirt off running around a hotel room.

Ben: Yeah…

[Everyone laughs]

John: That’s a video podcast.

Andrew: That would be your screensaver.

John: That’s actually my screensaver right now.

Laura: Yeah! I have a copy of that too.

Eric: [in a dumb voice] Is that a camera?

John: That’s my screensaver.


Bloopers


[Show intro music begins to play]

Eric: Okay.

Ben: [singing like Bon Jovi] Have a nice day.

[Andrew and Eric make guitar noises]

John: All right, cue the music.

Ben: Okay. [begins to sing MuggleCast’s show music and continues to sing it]

Eric: Hello and welcome to MuggleCast. This is our weekly Harry Potter discussion show where we bring you the latest in news, theories, discussions, Acne treatments, home recipes… we have it all here. So welcome. This is Episode 25. [continues to talk in the background]

John: No, seriously. Where’s the music? You guys don’t play the music live?

Andrew: Oh, shut up, you don’t.

John: Yeah, we do!

Andrew: You do? Really?

John: Yeah!

Andrew: No way.

John: [imitates Andrew] Yeah!

Ben: [imitates Andrew] Yeah! Yeah! All right!

Andrew: I almost thought of doing that, but then I was like, what’s the point? No, we do it raw. This is raw audio.

John: But it gets you in the mood! It gets you going.

Eric: [finishes his long speech] All right. I’m Eric Scull.

Andrew: Shut up, Eric.

[Everyone laughs]

John: Ahhh, Eric Scull. Eric Scull Island.


Comments and Questions


[Show Intro music is still playing]

[Audio]: I’m Liz and I’m from Maryland and I was wondering: if I call you guys enough times, will you ever call me back?

[Audio]: Hi, this is Cleo…
Beth:: And I’m

Beth:
Cleo: From Oregon. We love your show!
Beth:: Yeah.
Cleo: Andrew Rocks! Woohoo! Bye.
Beth:: Bye.

[Audio]: Hi! This is Elizabeth from Texas. I just wanted to tell you guys that I love your show. It saves me from my school life and from long car rides. So, thanks! Keep up the great work!

[Audio]: Hi MuggleCast, this is Lily from Massachusetts. I SCREAMED when I heard my voice playing. I am proud to say I’m on the radio now! I feel so special. And to follow up on your question, my sister’s eleven, and she’s not really in sync with the Potter world and everything, but it’s really funny because I let her listen to the MuggleCast episode, and so now she’s just always like, “Oh my god! Let’s go listen to MuggleCast!” You totally got her into that and now she thinks you guys are like the greatest thing and she thinks that all of you are really funny and that you’re just the greatest. So thank you so, so, so much. HUGS for all of you! And have a happy day. [laughs] Love, from Lily. Hearts. Love you! Bye!

[Audio]: Hey this is Kayla Simmons from Michigan. I’m sorry, Andrew, but Dumbledore is dead. I have to agree with the others. And he will talk to Harry again, but I’m sorry. He’s dead. There’s no way of going back. Great job, love ya. Bye.

[Music ends]

———————–

Written by: Micah, Ally, Martina, and Sarah