Transcript #48

MuggleCast 48 Transcript

Show Intro

Andrew [Show Intro with music in background]: Because it was just a year ago today that Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince was released – oh, it’s bringing back memories – this is MuggleCast Episode 48 for July 16th, 2006.

Your No. 1 source for all your Internet needs, has new domain names, transfers and renewals for as low as $1.99. Plus, check out their hosting plans, website builders, secure certificates and much more! Plus, as a MuggleCast listener enter the code “Muggle,” that’s M-U-G-G-L-E, when you check out and save an additional 10% off any order. Get your piece of the Internet today at!

Hello everyone and welcome back to the show. I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Kevin: I’m Kevin Steck.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Eric: And I’m Eric Scull.

Andrew: And this is the show where we bring you the latest in Harry Potter news, theories, discussions, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And now, we’ve learned that we total cars.

[Someone makes car noise]

Andrew: Any reaction?

[Someone makes car noise again]

Andrew: Before we go anywhere else, Micah Tannenbaum’s standing by in the MuggleCast News Center with the past week’s top Harry Potter news stories.


Micah: In a list of the 100 greatest family films compiled by Channel 4, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone came in at Number 15. ET, Shrek, and Mary Poppins took the top three spots.

At the 2006 Home Entertainment Awards, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire picked up prizes in the categories of “DVD Extras of the Year” and “Sell-Through Title of the Year.” The Awards recognise outstanding achievement in home video.

A new article published by Entertainment Weekly gives their take on the top sidekicks ever to be together, from real life to fantasy. Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger come in together at Number 11 behind the likes of Ed McMahon, Robin, and George Costanza.

Electronic Arts, the worldwide video game developer known to us for their work on the Harry Potter video game franchise, announced yesterday that they are actively developing six new titles to be released this Fall for the Nintendo Wii. Of those, one is a new Harry Potter game specifically designed for the new video game system. The Wii’s primary new feature is its controller, which is held with one hand and waved at the screen. From this, it’s easy to assume that the developers could create an area of the game that lets you cast spells with a flick of your wrist.

Dan Radcliffe has released his most recent newsletter. Be sure to head over to to check it out.

Last week, M. Night Shyamalan told that he has put some serious thought into directing either of the final two Potter films. On this Sunday’s edition of PotterCast, Melissa Anelli talks with Shyamalan about the boy wizard. In a preview on Leaky’s site, the director states he would offer the “greatest protection” on author JK Rowling’s work.

Finally, an article published today in JAM! Television reports that Robbie Coltrane has “just wrapped his scenes on the fifth Harry Potter movie.” All filming for Order of the Phoenix is scheduled to be completed by late Fall. We are officially less than one year away from the release of the fifth film. The movie is slated to be released in United States and United Kingdom on July 13, 2007.

That’s all the news for this July 15th, 2006 edition of MuggleCast. Back to the show.

Andrew: All right, thank you Micah. [laughs]


Andrew: Wow, we’ve a few announcements to get to this week. Oh, how could I be so silly. I almost forgot the latest batch of names for Micah Tannenbaum. This one comes from Ryan, 18 of Virginia who calls himself “The Nickname King.”

Jamie: Who…

Andrew: I really like these.

Jamie: Oh, I thought that his nickname was “King.”

Kevin: Ryan, the “Nickname King.”

Jamie: Not that he calls himself with the “Nickname King.”

Andrew: Okay.

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: What do you guys think of these? Micahscope. Huh, huh?

[Kevin and Jamie laugh]

Andrew: Tann-en the Sun. And, the Baum-badeer. Didn’t we already think of that one?

Ben: I don’t know.

Kevin: I think we did, yeah.

Ben: But, interestingly enough, today – just last night I went to the P.O. Box, okay? And, I open up the box and I pull out this letter and I start feeling it and I’m like, “Oh my gosh, it’s like ten Subway gift cards.”

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: And, I open it up and it says on it – there’s like a piece of what looks like bathroom tile and it says “Formica” and below it is says “For Micah.” [laughs]

Jamie: What? Does he collect, like bathroom tiles, or something?

Ben: No, no. Formica. It’s like the top of the table.

Andrew: Oh!

Jamie: Oh right. [laughs] Yeah. That’s clever. That’s clever.

Ben: It said “For Micah.”

Jamie: That’s clever!

Ben: It was great.

Andrew: So you going to mail that to him?

Ben: Of course.

Jamie: It’s kind of heavy though, isn’t it? To mail?

Kevin: Nope, he’ll never see it.

Jamie: Yeah, he will never see it.

Andrew: It’s a floor tile? Ben will put it in his room.

Ben: No, it’s like a table top, but it looks like that. It’s like a little sample.

Andrew: Oh.

Jamie: Here’s a new name for him. When Micah starred in The Flintstones as Barney’s baby, what was he called?

Ben: I don’t know.

Andrew: I don’t know.

Jamie: Have you guys seen The Flintstones?

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: Wait, I saw The Flintstones. What about it?

Andrew: I haven’t seen it since ’94.

Jamie: What’s Barney’s baby called?

Eric: Barney’s baby? Oh, Bam-Bam.

Jamie: Yeah, so change it a bit for Micah. “Baum-Baum.”

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Baum-Baum.

Eric: [sings] Shake your Baum-Baum. Shake your Baum-Baum.

Andrew: All right, that’s Joke One of Jamie’s Joke of the Day.

Jamie: Yeah.


Andrew: We’ve got quite a few announcements this week. Don’t forget to vote for us on Podcast Alley because if you don’t, we will cry ourselves to sleep and there will be no MuggleCast.

Ben: Are we in the lead on Podcast Alley?

Andrew: No. Pottercast is still beating us.

Ben: Really? Even after last week?

Andrew: Yeah. By like 20 votes though, not that much.

Eric: Oh guys, don’t forget that…

Andrew: It’s pretty tight competition this week.

Eric: That’s because their fans have more to do than homework when they’re at home.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Don’t forget that.

Andrew: Well, see, their offering their listeners an incentive for voting for them.

Jamie: Which is what?

Andrew: John’s going to sing a song in New York for Jo, “New York, New York.”

Jamie: Well, fine then…

Eric: Well…

Andrew: We’ve got to offer them something. Jamie, what would you want to do?

Eric: You know, I’m very upset.

Jamie: I want to… Okay, if they vote for us and we win, then Ben will, I don’t know.

Ben: I’ll sing “Photograph” for everybody. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah. Yeah, you can… No, no…

Ben: [sings] “Look at this photograph…”

Jamie: You can sing “You’re Beautiful” by James Blunt.

Andrew: Oh, I like that, yeah.

Ben: [sings] “You smile at me on a subway…”

Eric: On a subway. [laughs]

Ben: [Sings] “You’re with another man…”

Jamie: What did…

Ben: [Sings] “You smiled at me in the subway…”

Andrew: Ben, are you promising people that?

Jamie: What did James Blunt say… Hey Ben, what did James Blunt say to the 12-inch cheese steak when the cheese steak grinned at him? [laughs]

Ben: [sings] “You smiled at me in the subway…”

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Actually, here’s what I’m thinking…. Okay, if I get… I’m probably leaving Monday, so I wouldn’t be able to know. Let’s see. Okay, if we beat them by more than 100 votes, I’ll do it.

Jamie: Do what? Sing “You’re beautiful?” Okay.

Andrew: [laughs] All right, it’s on.

Ben: No, I don’t know. I don’t want to sing it. I don’t want to do it. I can’t do it.

Kevin: But where’s he going to sing it?

Ben: I can’t do it. I can’t do it. I’m too big of a…

Andrew: All right.

Eric: I’ll sing something.

Andrew: Jamie, you want to offer something?

Ben: Jamie will do it.

Jamie: No, I won’t. I’m already eating the sausages if Harry dies, I can’t take any more punishment.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Jamie, your sausages are very, very popular.

Jamie: Yeah, well what can I say? Jumbo ones.

Andrew: All right, Eric what will you do if…?

Eric: What will I do?

Jamie: He’ll provide 500 photos for the fans. Oh no, wait, he’s already done that.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: He’ll make another PhotoBucket.

Eric: Alright, if we get–if we beat Pottercast, I will sing, in person, a…

Ben: An Elton John song. He’ll sing “Rocketman.”

Jamie: “Rocketman,” yeah.

Eric: Well yeah, no. I’ll do that for free. I’ll do that for free.

Ben: [sings] “I left last night, pre-flight.”

Eric: But anyway, there’s a Brittany Spears song “Lucky.” You know “Lucky” by Brittany Spears?

Ben: No, I don’t.

Jamie: No, we don’t know.

Eric: A few of the people who run or another one of the other Evanna Lynch sites have a filk, or I guess a parody of it that they wanted me to sing for them. I told them I would. I would record it, called “Looney” for Luna Lovegood and it’s based on Brittany Spear’s “Lucky” and I will sing that in person if we beat PotterCast on Podcast Alley.

Andrew: All right, wonderful. And an update on Lumos and New York City, don’t forget people to RSVP. We have over… If you e-mailed an RSVP back before the new Leaky Mug site to hplive at gmail dot com, we ask you to RSVP again on the Leaky Mug – or, not “The Leaky Mug” – just because it’s much easier to count the RSVPs up that way. We have over 200 RSVPs for Lumos and over 600 RSVPs [laughs] for New York.

Jamie: Hey Andrew, and your test this week is, can you remember what “RSPV”, sorry “RSVP” stands for?

Ben: Re-pa vous le-on [Attempts to speak French, but fails miserably]

Eric: Respondez, s’il vous plait.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah, that’s what I would say.

Jamie: Repondez, s’il vous plait. Very close, very close.

Andrew: We actually have a story about that, Jamie, for our Chicken Soup this week.

Jamie: Oh yeah, we do!

Andrew: If you read it. Okay, Eric did you have an announcement about Lumos and New York, or Lumos?

Eric: Okay, so after the performance of Harry and the Potters, I wanted to get together in maybe the lobby of the JW Marriot or someplace. I don’t know. I’m not very sure about the legality of any of this, but I wanted to get together and “popcorn read” one of the books in the Harry Potter series. Do you guys know what a popcorn reading is? It’s when you read, like…

Andrew: Yeah, I did this when I was four. [laughs]

Eric: You read a little bit. Well, we’ll all have name tags and…

Jamie: What is it? What do you have to do?

Eric: Popcorn reading. Okay, well you take a book and you start reading it, I guess you do voices and everything like that and then, when you get tired of reading, you say “popcorn” – you stop reading and you say “popcorn” – and then you pick someone else and then they start reading. And the deal is we’ll have a bunch of fans who don’t know each other – the key is that you don’t know each other. A bunch of fans will get together and they’ll read – I guess it’s Prisoner of Azkaban I wanted to read – and we’ll just read a little bit of it. It will be like an hour or two after 10:00 or 8:00 when Harry and the Potters is done. And, we’ll just hear fellow fans doing the voices of all our beloved characters and just reading the book. It’s just some kind of cool cozy reading corner with Eric and you. Super Awesome Vegas Magical Outing at Night with Eric and You. Okay, and anybody who might be interested in coming to this, please email me at gasmoney at staff dot mugglenet dot com and you’ll either receive an update or I’ll know how many people are interested. And then I will see by next week or at Lumos if I can actually do that. If we’re allowed to congregate in a big lobby or something. So, once again, this is the Super Awesome Vegas Magical Outing at Night with Eric and You, “savegasmoney” is the acronym and call – email gasmoney at staff dot mugglenet dot com.

Andrew: As most of you know, every single week a new transcript goes up of the past week’s show and as everyone knows Micah Tannenbaum, or…

Jamie: Baums-a-lot.

Andrew: …Micahscope heads that – or that – [laughs] heads that section. And he has quite a few transcribers who we would like to take a moment to thank. So, to Sarah, Ally, Martina, Jessica, Amanda, Roni, Rhiannon, David, and Margaret, and Emily, thank you very much for helping out…

Jamie: Thank you!

Andrew: …with the transcripts. And, we’ll be seeing a few of them up in New York and we’ll be giving them a MuggleCast t-shirt.

Jamie: And hugs.

Listener Rebuttals – Mirror of Erised

Andrew: Listener Rebuttals this week, Kylie, 32 of LA writes about the Mirror of Erised discussion we had last week.

“I absolutely loved your last discussion about the Mirror of Erised and whether Harry could use it for guidance to find Horcruxes. I just wanted to remind you guys that Dumbledore told Harry in Book One that the Mirror offers no knowledge nor truth.

In my opinion, even though Harry saw his “family”, most of those characters that he saw were not real people, but people he had a deep and desperate desire to share life with. This is because we know that James was an only child and Lily’s only living relative was Petunia. Therefore, all the people he saw in the Mirror were most likely people who could possibly be relatives, but were either dead or not real.

That brings me to my next opinion, that there’s absolutely no way he can use the Mirror to find the Horcruxes, unless of course it was intended so with an enchantment, like the Philosopher’s Stone. Because the mirror does not offer truth or knowledge, one can not use it to seek either one.”

Jamie: I think that’s a brilliant point, and that’s completely changed our discussion from last week.

Ben: Yeah, sorry.

Jamie: Yeah, sorry, we’re stupid. [laughs]

[Andrew and Ben laugh]

Eric: Wait, has it really?

Jamie: Yeah. We said that it’s a contradiction that the Mirror can show only your heart’s desire, but it couldn’t tell you something that it wasn’t common knowledge, like the meaning of life.

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: But what she’s just said is that’s completely wrong because it shows neither knowledge nor truth. So, that’s one to Kylie, zero to us.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: Thanks.

Listener Rebuttals – Mirror of Erised: Take Two

Ben: Our next Listener Rebuttal comes from Grace, age 17, from Minnesota. Subject: The Mirror of Erised.

“Hi guys, love the show! On Episode 47, you were talking about the possibility of Harry seeing how to find a Horcrux within the Mirror of Erised. However, in her interview with Emerson and Melissa, Jo said Harry ‘would have to see Voldemort finished, dead, gone, wouldn’t he? Because he knows now that he will have no peace and no rest until that this is accomplished.’ This means that since finishing off Voldemort is his ultimate heart’s desire, the Mirror won’t show him Horcruxes, since they are only a means to fulfilling that goal.”

Jamie: I think that’s a really, really good point. I was thinking that last week when we were talking about it, but I don’t think I mentioned it. I think that he – your heart’s desire has got to be the final piece of the puzzle. It can’t be the means, because clearly you want the end more than you want the means. So, yeah. I think that’s exactly right.

Eric: Harry’s heart’s desire changed. At first it was to see his family, and then at the end of it, it was to get the Sorcerer’s Stone and all that. And I really think that if Harry wanted it deep enough, he could see getting a Horcrux. If he had one Horcrux left and he…

Jamie: But he doesn’t want it!

Eric: He wants to find a Horcrux to kill it!

Jamie: But his…

Eric: He needs to do…

Jamie: Okay, but Eric, but Eric, it’s a shortcut to – that he’d rather have the end, so why would you… Okay, say if you wanted to cycle two states, yeah? You could either look in the mirror and see a brand new bike that’s worth $50,000, or you can see yourself at the place. Which would you rather? You’d see yourself at the place, since you’d rather be there.

Eric: But you need the Horcrux! What I’m saying is – no. I’m not saying, I’m not saying he could actually retrieve the Horcrux from the Mirror. That doesn’t – he obviously wants to use it, but…

Jamie: No, but his true desire wouldn’t ever be to see a Horcrux.

Kevin: Yeah, but Jamie…

Jamie: His true desire would be to finish Voldemort. Yeah?

Kevin: I think Eric’s point is that maybe you’re going to see that bike at first, right, having the bike at first. But when you start working for the bike and you start earning that money, when you’re like, “Oh my god, this is killing me,” you may see yourself going…

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: “Oh geez, I really want to see myself at the bike place buying it.”

Eric: No. What I’m saying is that Harry’s desire changed. At first he wanted to see his family, then he wanted to get – it’s an immediate thing. You can look into the mirror and see different things depending on your…

Jamie: It’s not immediate. Of course it’s not immediate! It’s built up, it’s like pent up…

Kevin: What?

Jamie: The deepest – well, the deepest most desperate desire in your heart doesn’t just change momentarily just like Ben’s band of the moment.

Eric: It does change! It does change. It changed for Harry in Book One.

Jamie: No! No! But – yes, it does, but it doesn’t just change suddenly. Events in the real world change it. It’s like that.

Eric: Well, yeah. But events in the real world like Harry – what I’m saying is I think that if he wanted to find a Horcrux and if his heart’s desire was to find a Horcrux, there’s no reason why he shouldn’t see that just because it would mean defeating Voldemort. Sure he wants to defeat…

Jamie: What would he rather find, though?

Eric: He would rather defeat Voldemort, but…

Jamie: How can his deepest, most desperate desire in his heart be any less than that goal, now? Especially after Dumbledore has died, Sirius has died. It’s a war.

Ben: Right.

Jamie: How could he ever want to have a lesser deepest desire than that? And anyway, as Grace points out, it can’t show truth or knowledge, so it couldn’t show him finding a Horcrux. It could show him holding it, but that would be pointless.

Eric: Well…

Jamie: You know?

Eric: Truth or knowledge; I think that was just the way Dumbledore chose to explain it. Truth or knowledge was to deter Harry from staring at it.

Jamie: No, no, no. But it didn’t…

Eric: But, I…

Jamie: It didn’t actually show him truth or knowledge. It just showed him holding it. So, if you – if the most deepest, most desperate desire in your heart is to have the Philosopher’s Stone, you’d see yourself holding it, you wouldn’t see yourself finding it, and it was just so that the enchantment works.

Kevin: If you – if Harry found all the Horcruxes except one, right? Ron and Hermione both died…

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: …trying to find that last Horcrux, right? And all he needs is finding that last Horcrux to kill Voldemort, I think if he looked in the Mirror of Erised, he’d see himself holding that last Horcrux and not killing Voldemort.

Jamie: No, I disagree. I disagree.

Ben: No, that’s not true because the purpose, the sole reason that he’s in it anymore is he… Okay! His deepest desire isn’t to find the Horcruxes; it’s what he’s going to do with the Horcruxes, which is defeat Voldemort.

Jamie: Exactly, yeah, yeah.

Ben: So, okay. If you’re in his situation. Okay! For example, earlier I went to Subway, and say my greatest, deepest desire was to eat Subway. Would I see myself eating the sandwich or would I see myself driving there?

Jamie: Exactly. You’d see yourself eating the sandwich. You wouldn’t see yourself driving there.

Eric: But, if you wanted to make it to Subway – if you wanted to make it to Subway, you would see yourself making it to Subway.

Ben: Why would Harry’s greatest desire be to fight Voldemort? It’s to have Voldemort dead.

Andrew: I have another Listener Rebuttal that I just found, because we’ve been getting a lot of feedback about this discussion because it…

Ben: Hold on.

Andrew: It’s been going back and forth so much.

Listener Rebuttals – Mirror of Erised: Take Three

Eric: This is Lisa, 16, from San Diego. Her subject is also Mirror of Erised. Lisa says:

“I disagree with what you were saying in the latest MuggleCast about the Mirror of Erised, because the Mirror doesn’t give you what you want most, it shows you what you want most. So, if someone’s most heartfelt desire really was to know the meaning of life, it would show that person knowing that secret, not give them the answer.”

I agree with that.

“So if the person desired to know the meaning of life so that they could be at peace or teach others or make the world a better place, they would see themselves doing these things or being these things, but not the meaning of life itself. So, I don’t think the Mirror would show Harry where the Horcruxes were, but would rather show him what he would do with them.”

I see.

Jamie: This is exactly right, exactly what we were just talking about and what Grace said, that it can’t show you – it can’t give you what you want apart from when Dumbledore made it so. It just shows you what you want. I think that’s a brilliant point. I think that’s really good.

Eric: Yeah, I would agree with that. I think this said it a little bit clearer for me, at least to understand where you guys were coming from, that it would show Harry destroying the Horcruxes as opposed to finding the Horcruxes. Though, I guess I would argue if he really wanted to find them, if that was his…

Jamie: The point she’s making is that you wouldn’t see yourself destroying it in the Cave because the Mirror can’t know that it’s in the cave. You just see yourself, I don’t know, against a white background just destroying it, because it can’t show you whatever. And perhaps if you perceive the Horcrux to be, say, a cup, then you’d see it being a cup. It’s your subconscious that tells you what you think it would be, so it can’t actually tell you anything you don’t know. It’s just a projection of what you think.

Listener Rebuttals – Snape’s Protective Instinct

Ben: Our next Listener Rebuttal comes from Niamh, age 14, from Illinois. The subject: Snape’s Protective “Instinct.”

“In regards to Episode 47, I’d like to comment on the Snape protecting the Trio issue. I agree that it could be a teacher’s instinct, but I personally think the Snape isn’t pure evil. He must have some compassion in him. It’s hard to tell what side Snape is on, but I don’t think that, at this point in his life, he would kill (or let die) an innocent student or anyone else unless he really, really had to. It’s just hard for me to picture Snape that cruel. He always seemed more humane than many of the other Death Eaters. Thanks!”

Jamie: He is. That’s the thing; he’s mean, he’s not cruel. I think that’s a distinction you’ve got to make.

Andrew: I do think so. But, I mean, then again, this was what occurred in the movie, so we shouldn’t be theorizing about this too much.

Ben: That’s true.

Andrew: Because it was just Steve Kloves going, “Hey! This would be nice.”

Kevin: Yeah, it was an interpretation of the book. So.

Andrew: Right.

Jamie: Yeah.

Main Discussion – Room of Requirement

Andrew: So, moving along to our main discussion this week: the Room of Requirement, spawned by Jamie Lawrence. So Jamie, this is all you.

Jamie: Yes, I built the room. I built the Room of Requirement.

Andrew: No, no, no. [laughs]

Jamie: Well, I thought this would be an extremely interesting topic because it’s one of those things where you can’t see where its brain is kept, so we can’t really examine it. We don’t know who made it, where it came from. It’s kind of a second Chamber of Secrets, except it doesn’t have a Basilisk in it.

Kevin: Which is good. [laughs]

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: Exactly. But I’m sure if you – it is good, but I’m sure if you passed and wished for one, one would appear. Or would it?

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: I don’t know! That’s the kind of thing we’re going to be discussing. Does it have limitations? Could you ask for a room that makes yourself immortal forever, and do the effects of the room only last while you’re inside? So, these are the kinds of things we’re going to be discussing.

How Does It Work?

Jamie: Should we start with, how does it work?

Eric: Well, okay. It works – the Room of Requirement is located at, on the seventh floor, I guess, one of the corridors of the seventh floor. And in order to – it has to be activated. What it is, it’s a blank slab of wall on the seventh floor in one of the corridors. Isn’t there two statues of some guy teaching goblins how to tap dance?

Jamie: I don’t know. I don’t think that’s important, though, to be fair. I just… [laughs]

Eric: No, I was just being encyclopedic. Okay, anyway, so you…

Jamie: There’s a slight scratch on the brick just outside the room.

Eric: [laughs] Hey! Third brick from the left, it’s happened before.

Jamie: Hey!

Eric: So, listen. In order to activate the room, you have to walk past it. You have to walk back and forth three times thinking and requesting the wall to appear or requesting a room. The Room of Requirement is a good term because it’s a variable, the room that you need. You can walk past it and say, “I need a room to hide this potions book,” or “I need a room to hide from Filch. I need a room that is equipped for teaching of Defense Against the Dark Arts.” That kind of thing.

Ben: I need a room to snog Jamie.

Jamie: [laughs] One of the fundamental sort of laws of physics and the world is that you can’t create something out of nothing. Now magic – we’ve seen that the effects of conjuring stuff don’t last indefinitely, and I think it follows that the more powerful a wizard you are, or witch of course, the more complex the things you can conjure, and the longer time they take to go away. But, it also follows that are all those things that you conjured real? And so does the stuff that appears in the room, is that real? Or is it just there as long as you’re inside the room? Because it’s like, can you take stuff out of the room?

Ben: Here’s what my theory is on it.

Jamie: Apart from the stuff you put in?

Ben: Okay. When you go in the Room of Requirement, and say… What I’ve always thought is, why couldn’t you walk past the door – why couldn’t Quirrell do that and want a Sorcerer’s Stone or 300 Sorcerer’s Stones? The items that appear in the room have to come from somewhere. They have to come from somewhere. And so if the item isn’t readily available, you couldn’t wish for four 400 Sorcerer’s Stones because that just wouldn’t happen. But things like a whistle or…

Jamie: You mean you think there’s a warehouse somewhere and they just pick the items from it, and it has to be in the warehouse?

Ben: No, it’s magical!

Jamie: It’s stocked.

Ben: I think you could – [laughs] I think you could take it out of there. I mean, if it’s minor items, I don’t… There have to be, of course, some limitations on it, otherwise you could take – wish for a room full of gold. But, that’s not going to work. So I don’t know, it’s…

Jamie: The fastest computer ever.

Ben: You see, the thing is this magical understanding so it’s beyond our comprehension. It’s not going to make sense to us, so I don’t know where this stuff comes from, but…

Jamie: Why are we discussing it, then? [laughs]

Ben: There’s no point, then.

Jamie: Fine. Right, everyone, we’re closing the show, that’s enough, we’re finished. I mean, so obviously, it’s impossible to understand how it works until we get further information because we just don’t know if you can take stuff out…

Ben: Right.

Jamie: …apart from stuff you put in like the book. Or… But, obviously, it has to have a link with something. Because, I mean, the two cabinets, clearly it’s… I mean, the room has to be on Earth because you can go straight from that cabinet to the one in Borgin and Burkes.

Eric: Borgin and Burkes.

Jamie: It’s not like a different universe, but I just don’t – I don’t know. What does everyone think? E-mail us. E-mail us.

Eric: Okay, that’s the thing. Okay, it pulled that cabinet from somewhere. That cabinet did exist in Hogwarts before it was in the Room of Requirement because Fred and George Weasley stuffed the Slytherin Montague into that cabinet and that is the, I guess we’ll call it the – what is it? The Vanishing Cabinet? Is that…

Jamie: Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Vanishing Cabinet.

Eric: Yeah, the Vanishing Cabinet. So, that Vanishing Cabinet did exist prior to its either being placed in the Room of Requirement, or something like that. Like, it was at Hogwarts and I think – do you know where they said they got it? Where Fred and George got it when they shoved Montague into it? Do you know where it came from?

Jamie: I can’t remember, no. I’m not sure.

Eric: Because, the thing is, it’s in there and that’s the question, how did it get there and how did it get into that room and…?

Ben: Have you ever thought that maybe the items that appear in the Room of Requirement had to be brought in there at some point?

Jamie: Oh yeah, but you can’t have everything. You can’t cater for absolutely everyone who could possibly walk past it and wish for something because you’d have to put billions and millions and millions of items in there. But, I think that you can put stuff in.

Ben: [laughs] It has to be in stock.

Jamie: I just don’t know if you can take stuff out that’s been in there. Yeah, it has to be in stock. You like, “Hey, I want a computer,” and it says, “Out of stock.” So you think, “Oh no, I’ll have to come back later.”

Eric: I don’t know that it works like that though, I mean. It’s just, you asked a question. If you asked for a room that made you immortal, would that happen? I don’t know. I think – is that even possible? Like a room that makes you… Because I think, a room that makes you immortal in there, or makes you safe, would just be a giant padded room.

Kevin: Yeah, it’s open to interpretation.

Eric: Something like that. But, I don’t think that there’s actually a room with a gas in it, that if you breathe it, it makes you immortal. Or like a room with a fountain that, if you drink from it you’re immortal. I don’t think it would do that.

Jamie: It comes down to the, if a genie appears, can you wish for a million wishes? Can you break the laws of the thing?

Ben: Yeah, but…

Eric: Yeah.

Jamie: So, like, do the effects of the room only last while you’re in there or do they come out?

Ben: Well, I would think they would have to because otherwise couldn’t you walk by the Room of Requirement and say, “I want Voldemort to be in there, tied up with his hands behind his back so I can kill him.” Or…

Jamie: [laughs] Yeah.

Ben: “I want Dumbledore, my parents to be in there alive.” You can’t do that. So…

Jamie: Yeah, yeah. No, obviously you can’t do that, but it’s stuff you need though, isn’t it? It’s…

Ben: You have to legitimately need it.

Jamie: It’s the Room of Requirement. It’s not the Room of What You Want.

Ben: That’s true. You have to legitimately need it.

Eric: Okay, well I want to make it clear that at least the stuff doesn’t go away, like forever. Because the thing is, Draco was using the Room of Requirement in Book Six to mend the broken Vanishing Cabinet. Now, the thing is, though, it couldn’t have gone away after he was in there once because as soon as he left, it would go back to being broken or it would go – he would never get anywhere if…

Jamie: But, what does the Room of Requirement look like when it isn’t being used? It’s like a Boggart thing. No one knows what a Boggart looks like when it isn’t in the form.

Eric: Well, the whole point of the Room of Requirement is that you – it can be anything. It’s a variable. And I think, can’t more than one room be open at once? Because, Harry was always trying to get into the room while Draco was in it, but yet, Trelawney… But, yeah. But Professor Trelawney, looking for a place – and these were the exact specifications. She was looking for a place just to stash her sherry bottles and she found the room that Draco was in. But Harry tried, “I need to see the room that Draco is in. I need to see the room with the…” He tried all these…

Jamie: He didn’t need to, though. I suppose she – yeah, but I don’t think it can be used more than once at the same time because it’s like when…

Eric: But you can get into the room, if it’s open, you can get into it.

Jamie: Well perhaps Draco said, “I want this room to be completely safe from Harry Potter. I do not want him to get in.” And it would have to honor that because he said it first.

Eric: Yeah.

Ben: What’s interesting about the Room of Requirement is that Jo did a lot of good foreshadowing with it in Book Four when Dumbledore is telling Karkaroff or Madame Maxime…

Kevin: About the…yeah.

Jamie: The chamber pots, yeah.

Ben: Yeah. How he walked into a room with the chamber pots…

Eric: Yeah, the chamber pots.

Ben: …and then he can’t find it again. Because he was up late one night looking for the bathroom and he stumbled upon a room with chamber pots.

Jamie: He must have known. He must have known about it. If Dumbledore knows about it…

Ben: And also, wouldn’t he know where the bathroom is? Seriously.

[Ben and Jamie laugh]

Jamie: He probably would have. He’s lived there, like four million years…

Eric: Wouldn’t he have one in his office? I mean…

Jamie: What, an en suite? En suite bathroom to his office.

Eric: Couldn’t he just conjure up a toilet? Couldn’t he just conjure up a toilet

Jamie: No, Eric, Eric. Because it would disappear and then it would just fall all over the floor.

The Room’s Future

Jamie: What will happen to the Room of Requirement now because it has been established as a weakness to Hogwarts? Is there any way to empty it out or put it out of order or stop people using it?

Ben: Empty out the warehouse.

[Ben and Jamie laugh]

Kevin: I mean, it had to be created by someone. And I would assume that…

Jamie: The four founders, probably.

Kevin: Yeah, if the enchantment was put in place, I’m sure that it can be taken down.

Jamie: Away, yeah, yeah.

Eric: But can it be, now that Dumbledore’s gone? Because Dumbledore, I mean, put it this way. Dumbledore knew all these languages that Harry didn’t even hear about. And I’m sure he’s not the only one. But, the fact is, all these enchantments were put on it since ancient, ancient magic that you couldn’t read about in books. Things like Horcruxes and stuff.

Kevin: Yeah, but you would think that, being a school, that they’d have some history of what was done and if anyone would know, it would be the…

Eric: You would think, but that’s like…

Kevin: …Headmaster or Headmistress.

Eric: Yeah.

Kevin: And I would believe that that person who would know would be the next person in line to take over the school.

Eric: Right. But, it’s something like the Chamber of Secrets. They really didn’t believe it even existed…

Kevin: Yeah, but…

Eric: …until Book Two. Like, they actually… So wait, if anybody knew about the Room of Requirement, wouldn’t they go up to it and say “I need the Chamber of Secrets”? Or…

Ben: You have to legitimately need it.

Jamie: I don’t think it can give you something… Yeah, but it couldn’t give you something that’s elsewhere.

Eric: No, no, you don’t have to need it. You just walk by and request it. You walk by and request it and then it opens, like…

Andrew: I think the answer is right here in the title: “The Room of Requirement.” Like what Jamie was just saying earlier…

Jamie: Yeah, you need it. You can’t…

Dumbledore’s Army

Andrew: Yeah. You absolutely need it, I guess. I mean, then again, did Harry need Dumbledore’s Army? Was that required? A room for Dumbledore’s Army?

Eric: It was just a good idea where he really wanted the companionship and they needed a place – well, they kind of needed a place against – free from tyranny, free from Umbridge. That kind of thing.

Kevin: Exactly, and I don’t think it’s that he – did he need Dumbledore’s Army. He needed a room to practice.

Eric: Yeah. Just because you require something…

Kevin: So, he already had the Army, he just required a room to practice that was private.

Need vs. Require

Eric: Just because you require something, doesn’t mean you need it, though. If you require a bicycle to carry out a bicycle ride across two states, that’s something you want to do. That’s not necessarily something you need to do.

Ben: No. “Require” and “need” are synonymous. “Require” and “need” are synonymous in this instance.

Jamie: I think they are, yeah.

Eric: You want a room, you want a place to hide your sherry bottles, but truthfully, nobody goes up to Trelawney’s office. She could just put them underneath one of her…

Ben: Well, honestly speaking, do you legitimately “need” anything?

Andrew: That’s what I always think, yeah.

Jamie: Exactly, you don’t. Harry doesn’t need to find the Horcruxes. He doesn’t need to. If you don’t believe in fate and stuff, he doesn’t need to.

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: Voldemort could win. But that leads on to asking whether Voldemort could use it to hide the Horcruxes. Could he say, “I need a room that no one could ever, ever get into, apart from me.”?

Ben: Well, you see, I think he’s too arrogant. I think that Voldemort is too arrogant to think that someone could ever figure him out.

Jamie: No, but could he? Could he?

Ben: Theoretically, is it possible?

Jamie: But could he? That’s the point.

Ben: I don’t know.

Jamie: It isn’t about whether he would, could he do it? But then that – but then, why didn’t they hold the Philosopher’s Stone in that? I think it’s just too unreliable, the Room of Requirement. It doesn’t seem like a sort of established thing that people use regularly. It’s like…

Ben: It’s kind of like the Mirror of Erised. I mean, you can’t really define…

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Ben: …what its limitations are, based off what’s been said in the book.

Jamie: Yeah, because people don’t know as well.

Ben: Good point, mate.

Eric: Yeah, about Voldemort and hiding his Horcruxes in there, I don’t think he personally would have had any time in Hogwarts to hide a Horcrux in the Room of Requirement.

Jamie: No, but could you? Could he do it, though?

Eric: Oh, could you? I don’t know why you necessarily couldn’t, but…

Dumbledore’s Bladder

Andrew: The Room of Requirement was first discovered in Goblet of Fire. Is that Jo’s clever way of explaining what it is? Dumbledore needed to go to the bathroom. He couldn’t, for some reason…

Jamie: No, but he didn’t need to. He could wait another two minutes or another five minutes.

Andrew: Maybe he couldn’t. Maybe he absolutely couldn’t! [laughs]

Jamie: But he clearly could, Andrew.

Andrew: How do you know how strong his bladder is? How do you know how strong Dumbledore’s bladder is? He’s an old guy!

Jamie: Okay, Andrew, Andrew, Andrew, Andrew he can clearly wait one more second, which means he didn’t need to go at that time.

Andrew: But is one more second…

Jamie: If he absolutely needed to go, he could have just “wee”d all over the floor if he needed to.

Andrew: Well, that’s the point. There would be a consequence to that. Maybe if there is a consequence to what you require, I don’t know. I just think…

Eric: I think Dumbledore is more than capable of conjuring up a urinal just to pee in, or a pot or anything. As soon as… After he mentioned the room, he knew Harry was listening at that moment and he turned and winked at him. This whole thing was about Dumbledore telling Harry about…

Andrew: That it’s there?

Eric: …the room. The fact is – the question is not whether or not Dumbledore actually needed to go to the bathroom, because I don’t think he did. He could have conjured up – and why doesn’t he have a bathroom in his office? He lives up in the top of the tower. Does every night…

Jamie: He brings up a fair point. It is a fair point.

Ben: Why can’t he just zap the urine out of his bladder?

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Put it in his Pensieve!

[Ben and Eric laugh]

Room of Requirement in Book Seven

Ben: Okay, are you sure he winked at him?

Andrew: Yes.

Ben: Okay, he was telling Madame Maxime about how he doesn’t know the secrets of Hogwarts and maybe, contextually, he was, it may seem like he was doing that, but Dumbledore is a mysterious man. Harry found it on his own. It isn’t like Harry went searching for a room that… You know what I’m saying?

Jamie: Yeah, I know.

Ben: Harry didn’t reference that in his memory, the time that Dumbledore winked at him. So…

Jamie: Next point, will Harry use the Room of Requirement to aid him on his quest in Book Seven, why or why not? I open that to the floor.

Ben: [laughs and continues in British accent] The floor. I have no idea.

Andrew: Well, you could narrow it down a bit. Obviously, he’s not going to use it for the Horcruxes, because that’s just way too easy. I mean…

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: Don’t get into that discussion again…

Andrew: No.

Ben: …because I’m pretty sure you can’t require the Horcruxes.

Jamie: Exactly.

Andrew: No, right. Well, there’s an alternative. You can just kill off Voldemort.

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Andrew: And this is my point of saying that there was no alternative for Dumbledore when he had to use the bathroom. [laughs]

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Anyway, is Harry even coming back to Hogwarts? I want him to, but…

Andrew: Yes! Yes! That’s a dumb question. Of course he is.

Jamie: He could still use it, though.

Ben: No, he’s not.

Jamie: He’s like…

Ben: Not for the whole time.

Jamie: No, he isn’t for the whole time.

Eric: Yeah, he’s always welcome at Hogwarts.

Jamie: Exactly.

Eric: I don’t know. The Room of Requirement, it seems like it was used twice now and that’s okay, and that’s good. The good side used it, the bad side used it.

Jamie: What it seems… Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

Eric: That’s like asking, will Harry retrieve the potions book? Will he retrieve Snape’s, the Half-Blood Prince’s book? You know, that’s like asking that – or will he be able to, because the thing is he wanted to come back and get it. He never really got the chance to, but he wanted to, because he marked it. He put the cage with the dead animal in it or something, on top of the book, and then he marked the book or something. So, he actually knows where the potions book is hidden if he can ever get into that room again. So, why is that significant? Why did he mark his place? Is that going to be neglected? Will he never…

Harry Potter and the Big Red Button

Jamie: What I’ve noticed, though, doing this discussion is, it doesn’t seem like we have enough information about it. I think it’s literally fitting as well. It’s… I don’t know how to pronounce this, a deus ex machina. You know? God from the machine. It means it’s a plot device capable of sorting out everything. So, it’s like a big red button that just kills Voldemort and finds the Horcrux and stuff like that, and, obviously, that can’t exist, or the entire magical world would be different, the laws would be different, and so, obviously, Harry can’t use it just to solve everything or the books would be two lines long. “Harry went to the Room of Requirement, pressed the big red button, and Voldemort died.”

[Andrew laughs]

Eric: And then what’s the second sentence?

Jamie: Uh…

Eric: The end? [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [laughs] “The end” is the second sentence.

Andrew: No, no, no. “Scar.” [laughs]

[Eric and Jamie laugh]

Jamie: Yeah, it’s just, “Scar.”

Eric: “The end. Scar.” [laughs] Scar.

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: “He pressed the big red button, then on the way out, on the wall, he hit his scar.”

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: Last sentence, “Ouch.”

Andrew: His scar jumped off his forehead. [sings] da da da da da da DA! The end.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Okay…

Brainless Objects

Jamie: So, we can compare it to the Marauders’ Map, Tom Riddle’s diary, the Mirror of Erised; things where you can’t see where they keep their brains, and Mr. Weasley warned Harry that you should never ever trust something where you can’t see where it keeps its brain. So, should we trust the Room of Requirement?

Eric: Yes, because it’s Hogwarts, and that’s like asking should you trust… Well, see there are so many things about Hogwarts; doors that open up into walls, things like that, so what kind of question is that?

Jamie: Isn’t it a…

Eric: If you were to ask this about the potions book, that’s a separate question, because it’s just a book with stuff written in it. It’s not like a live object, but the Room of Requirement isn’t exactly a live object as much as Riddle’s diary was, either.

Jamie: Exactly.

Eric: And can’t you see – but, can you trust Hogwarts?

Jamie: It’s a matter of sentience, though.

Eric: The Room of Requirement isn’t exactly a separate entity. I mean, it is part of Hogwarts, after all, and it’s part of the personality of at least one of the four founders, assuming that they built it.

Jamie: Don’t you think it’s a matter of sentience, where if things are self-aware and can actually think for themselves? Like, the Room of Requirement is just like a big program, really, and it just gives you what you want. It could be a program, or it could think for itself, whereas Tom Riddle’s diary is completely different and could respond to different things. It was much more alive than the Room of Requirement, I think.

Eric: I think it’s interesting to… It’s got, I think it’s got some kind of intelligence, because you could ask just for a place to practice spells, and it would give you loads and loads of shelves of the best books and comfortable pillows to practice, and that kind of thing. There’s some kind of… Because it gave Harry and the DA a lot more than they originally asked for. They just asked for a room to practice spells.

Jamie: But it’s a matter of interpretation, though. It could just be programmed to interpret stuff in a certain way, just like the Matrix.

Eric: Yeah, that’s what I’m thinking it’s like, but I think it does just react on your command. If you ask for something it will interpret it and give it, but I don’t think it’s a separate entity. I think it’s just part of Hogwarts. It’s part of what makes Hogwarts magical.

Jamie: Okay.

Eric: It’s just another interesting room, another interesting stairway that changes, you know?

Jamie: And once again, after that 15-minute discussion, we are yet to find a conclusion.

Andrew: [laughs] Well, that’s the – you really can’t, because there’s no real answer. The only real person that knows the answer is Jo.

Jamie: No, there’s not.

Kevin: Yeah, there’s not enough information on it to…

Andrew: Well, what I love about recording these podcasts is that we have all this saved, and we can go back and listen to it and go, “Oh, we were right there, we were wrong there.”

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: This is all, you know. It’s like an archive of theories and stuff, so we should place bets on all the stuff that we talk about. So…

Jamie: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: We really should. We already have one sausage bet. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, we do. [laughs] Unfortunately.

MuggleCast Car Giveaway

Andrew: Now we’re going to move on to a different story that we’ve yet to experience here on the show. This comes from Jim, 17 of Massachusetts.

“About a month ago, I downloaded MuggleCast onto my MP3 player, and was listening to it on my drive to work, and Laura said something that made me laugh really hard. In fact, it distracted me enough to not realize the car ahead of me was stopped, so I hit it going 50 miles per hour, and totaled my car.”

Kevin: Ouch!

Andrew: “Luckily, I walked away with only minor cuts. Well, since it was my first car, and most teens crash their first one, last week my mom and dad got me a newer, better car in place of the old one, so I would like to thank Laura for getting me a new car.”

Jamie: And, in fact, we’re running a new service. Just write in what car you want, and it will be shipped out to you as soon as possible.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: But you have to prove to us that you actually crashed your own car.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: So wait, so what did we learn from Jim, 17? We learned that Laura is funny.

Andrew: Yeah, I couldn’t believe it, either.

Eric: That’s amazing.

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: Not car crashing-worthy, but at least… [laughs] So, we e-mailed Jim back to get more information, and his parents bought him a new Pontiac Firebird in place of his, now totaled, ’99 Volkswagen. He actually attached a picture of this broken – well, this totaled…

Kevin: [laughs] Broken car. “I broke it.” [laughs]

Andrew: It’s more than just broken. [laughs] Yeah. Just a little accident. So, we’ll post this on the website.

Eric: Show notes. [laughs]

Favorite – End Battle Scene

Andrew: …website. Now we have a fun, favorite segment for you this week. Your favorite end battle scene. This comes from Alyssa, 13, of Massachusetts. She writes, simply,

“Hi, I’m Alyssa and I just love the show. Keep up the great work. I had an idea for the favorites segment. Favorite end battle scene. Again, I love the show.” [laughs]

Great e-mail. So, let’s go around the table here. Let’s start off with Eric, since he’s been away for a while. Eric, what’s your favorite end battle scene?

Eric: Oh, favorite end battle scene. I don’t know. I’m very…

Jamie: Wow, silence.

Eric: I like Book Five, I think, in the Ministry of Magic, because all those rooms and things that were mentioned. We’re going around in the Ministry of Magic, the Department of Mysteries, for crying out loud, and I would actually like to see – I don’t know what the odds are of seeing that room, or that whole department ever again. I think we should, but everything… They burst through the door into another room, and we didn’t know what the room was for, and didn’t really find out, but it was just all these, I guess, mysteries, is the way to do it. And that battle scene not only had all the DA fighting for their lives, what they learned all year, but also, then, all the Death eaters came, and all of the Order came, and Dumbledore faced Voldemort at the end. Dumbledore and Voldemort against each other. Nothing is better. I think Book Five.

Ben: I’d have to agree with Eric.

Kevin: Yeah, same with me.

Jamie: I concur. I concur.

Ben: What was interesting about Order of the Phoenix was beforehand, people were asking Jo about the book, and she said, “Well, we’re going to go somewhere new.” And it was so funny, because we went to five or six new places. We went to Grimmauld Place, we went to St. Mungo’s, we went to the Department of Mysteries, and I just found that interesting.

Eric: Yeah, there were a lot of new scenery changes. Do you guys it’ll be back at the Department of Mysteries again? Because Harry kind of is staying away from the Ministry. If he goes in, they’re going to suspect…

Jamie: It has to be, doesn’t it? Because the room with the locked door. You know the one? The Love Room.

Eric: That’s so weird, because Dumbledore told Harry what was in the room, or he told him about the room, but nobody can ever enter that room.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: Or something like the door’s locked. That’s so weird. A room that contains love?

Jamie: Well, clearly, he probably will be entering it.

Kevin: Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie: Just because Dumbledore said that nobody could ever, ever enter it, he probably will now.

Kevin: And she sort of focused on it so much that it made everyone go, “Ooh, what’s in there?”

Ben: That’s… The series is going to end in the Love Room.

Jamie: He’ll open the door, and some huge heart will come out and just…

Eric: Yeah.

Kevin: Care Bears.

Eric: It’s just like in Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark. The Ark of the Covenant broke open and the angels came out, and the site was too holy for anybody, and they had to close their eyes or else they died.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: [singing] After the flood, all the colors came out.

Andrew: [singing] Day!

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: I would have to agree, as well. I think it was one of the best scenes in the whole series, especially Dumbledore versus Voldemort. That was awesome.

Kevin: Dumbledore and Voldemort, yeah.

Ben: Oh, geeze. I about freaked out. That was great.

Jamie: It was the kind of story – it’s kind of like an action film, which you watch just for the action. It’s so cool. You can’t not like that scene. Voldemort versus Dumbledore. It’s just brilliant.

Eric: Not to mention there were so many cool – all the cool rooms.

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Eric: The Time Room, the Death Eater whose head was turned into a baby and grown back, and this statue of Magical Brethren, for crying out loud.

Jamie: Yeah, that’s awesome.

Eric: That’s like the coolest thing ever, so I don’t know.

Michael Gambon as Dumbledore in Ministry Battle

Eric: You guys think they’ll do that good in the movie? The end battle scene, because, I mean…

Andrew: I…

Eric: I’d like to see… I mean Michael Gambon, I guess he could face Ralph Fiennes, but I don’t know. It’s just…

Andrew: Well, we heard from Lucius… [laughs] Not Lucius.

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: We heard from Jason Isaacs that he’ll actually be doing a lot of shots on a huge green or blue screen, and this is leading people to believe that this whole end battle scene is going to be all shot on blue screen, and then they’re going to chroma everyone in, and it’s just going to be mayhem everywhere you look, and they wouldn’t possibly be able to do this all in one take with all the actors there at one time. So…

Jamie: Yeah, so blue screen.

Ben: I think that with battle scenes, I think we need to pay some homage to the Goblet of Fire Voldemort dueling Harry. That was great

Andrew: Well, yeah. I was going to bring that one up, because to think that we’re going to be seeing it again, hopefully, in Book Seven.

Eric: Ohhh!

Jamie: It will be completely different, though. He’ll be more prepared and…

Kevin: And Harry won’t be, Harry hopefully won’t be the helpless kid he was in the graveyard, you know?

Jamie: No, but it’s different. Yeah, it’s just

Kevin: I think the whole reason why people liked Book Five’s duel between Dumbledore and Voldemort was, it was actually a wizard duel, where it was…

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Kevin: It was the two most powerful wizards alive fighting.

Eric: It was a proper wizard duel, but also, I think the coolest thing about it was the history behind it. You know, Dumbledore was the only one he ever feared, and there he was calling him Tom.

Jamie: He called him Tom, as well, yeah.

Eric: He called him Tom, exactly. And I really worry about Michael Gambon. I’m not going to go into the old arguments about him, but I really don’t think Michael Gambon cares enough about the history of Dumbledore, or understands. Every interview…

Jamie: They’ll tell him, though. They’ll tell him, though, before he does it.

Eric: Every interview Michael Gambon’s like, “I don’t really know what the hell I’m saying, I just go out and say it.”

Andrew: Yeah. That’s such a problem. That’s terrible for WB PR. [laughs]

Ben: He’ll never be on the show. Michael Gambon will never be doing a fan interview for us.

Eric: I know, but he’s going to have to say, “I knew you’d come, Tom,” or, “Once again you failed to understand that mortality is not the worst thing,” and he says that right to him. And…

Jamie: But, Eric, Eric, he’s an actor, though. That’s the whole…

Eric: I know.

Jamie: He can do it, though. They’ll tell him what to do and he’ll do it as an experienced actor.

Ben: It doesn’t matter. It depends on the screenwriter. It has to depend on the screenwriter. If the screenwriter puts it in right, then that’s all that matters.

Eric: I just have to get over it. That’s all I have to do. I just have to get over… Because, the history, we have to have this sense of world, this sense of… I worried about this before Goblet of Fire came out. I worried that the movies wouldn’t be tied together in the same world, because of all the acting changes.

Andrew: The reason that this film is going to be so great is because you – like Jamie said. Like in the book, you have this huge, mass duel at the end. But, it’s among these actors who we’ve seen in Prisoner of Azkaban – the film – all do a fantastic job, and now they’re going to be in Order of the Phoenix, all together. And these British actors really shine through. They are fantastic.

Jamie: They really are, yeah. They’re very experienced actors.

Andrew: Working together with the kids and the adults. Yeah, it’s good. But the actors, the older actors, with each other are great. And whether Michael Gambon is a good Dumbledore or not, he’s still going to be able to make it work.

Jamie: I agree completely.

Eric: I think, as well…

Jamie: Also, that end scene is especially good, because we see new kinds of magic. Like him conjuring the shield, and the water going up and streaming in the air.

Kevin: Yep.

Jamie: And there doesn’t seem to be any spell for causing a pool of water to surround him and suffocate him. For us, it just seems like stuff that only experienced wizards can do.

Ben: And the Fountain of Magical Brethren. That was pretty cool, too.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: As I mentioned, yeah. But, that’s cool Jamie, too. I think you pointed out that we can see a certain change, and a certain allusion to the next movie, where there’s going to be all sorts of magic that makes no sense.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: And nonverbal spells are being taught, and all this magic that really just defies convention; what we’ve learned so far.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: The only actual spells we’ve learned have been in the dueling club scene, and then Alohamora in the first book, not a lot else besides Lumos and Lumos Maxima. Actual spells, we’re going to learn a lot more.

Ben: Lumos Maxima’s a movie thing, isn’t it?

Eric: Yeah. Well, it is. It is. But Lumos isn’t.

Ben:Lumos Maxima!

Eric:Maxima!” Woo hoo!

Andrew: I’ve been rereading Order of the Pheonix and every time there’s a Dumbledore line, I just sit here, and I take a minute to think how Michael Gambon is going to pull it off. Because I really like Michael Gambon…

Ben: He’s just not the serious type.

Andrew: …and I’m looking forward to the trial.

Ben: I could definitely see Richard Harris. No, I think Richard Harris…

Jamie: No way. No way!

Ben: …would do a lot better job of pulling off the serious Dumbledore.

Jamie: No, I personally think the complete opposite. Richard Harris I thought was, for some people, the only Dumbledore, and I completely respect that, but I don’t think he had that persona for Dumbledore at all. I think Michael Gambon, especially in Prisoner of Azkaban, right at the beginning, you really, really trusted him.

Ben: Oh no, he was way… I don’t know…

Eric: But Andrew, does Andrew see what I’m saying, with, just with the interviews that Gambon gives. He’s just like, “Yeah, I really don’t know what the hell I’m doing, it’s just a stupid kids movie.”

Andrew: Well, that’s true.

Eric: He’s like…

Andrew: He doesn’t know what’s going on in the books, but he’s a great actor and I think it counters…

Eric: But he doesn’t care, either. He’s just like, “I just read the script.”

Jamie: It doesn’t matter if he doesn’t care, or if he doesn’t know the history, or if he doesn’t know anything. He’s just got to deliver one line, and he has to do it well. He’s an actor, that’s why he’s a famous actor. He’s been in so much stuff because he can do that. You don’t think that every single adult actor has read the Potter books so they can give it their all. They’re actors, they’re actors and actresses, that’s the whole point.

Eric: Here’s a man who is openly insulting a large majority of the Harry Potter fan base in every interview.

Jamie: No, he’s not. He’s… No. Michael Gambon is that kind of guy. He’s a sort of, don’t care, happy-go-lucky, swearing on TV shows; that’s how he is. But, if he can pull off the role in the film, I don’t care what his history’s like, if he hasn’t read the books or anything.

Andrew: But, we’re all in agreement that the two final battle scenes with Voldemort are two of the best.

This Week in Potter

Andrew: Now, let’s move onto This Week in Potter. This is a nice one. July 16th, 2005, merely a year ago.

Ben: The release date of this show.

Andrew: Huh?

Ben: The show will be released on July 16th.

Andrew: Oh, cool. So, where were all of we? [pauses and laughs] Where were all of us?

Kevin: Wow!

Jamie: ‘We’ sounds better.

Andrew: Jamie, where the hell were you?

Jamie: Half-Blood Prince. I was in Edinburgh with Emerson and Melissa, Emerson’s mum, and Melissa’s two friends. Sorry, which day did it come out? The 16th or 15th?

Andrew: The 16th.

Jamie: Okay, the 16th. Then I was – I think I had just gotten to Edinburgh, and I was meeting Emerson at the airport, and were going to the hotel. Ywp, that’s where I was, then two days later I was at the castle. Edinburgh Castle.

Andrew: Eric, where were you?

Eric: I was in Ohio. Actually, it was in Hudson, Ohio, and there was a town event there for Book Six. The whole town – kind of like what happened with Oak Park. The whole town was turning into Diagon Ally shops, things like that. And I guess I was just – I wouldn’t call myself the MC, but I was announcer for the events that were going on. I guess you guys were at Spellbound?

Ben: I was at Spellbound.

Andrew: Ben, where were you?

Eric: Spellbound.

Ben: I was at Spellbound in… What was the name of that little town? So, it was near Chicago. I forget the name of the town, but, yeah. I was at this town near Chicago at the mall at this party MuggleNet sponsored, hanging out with Damon.

Andrew: [laughs] Oh yeah!

Ben: That was the best part. And…

Eric: Eating waffles.

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: Then we went to the Hilton and we got our books there, then I stayed up until 4 AM reading on the couch in the Hilton. Then I went to sleep.

Andrew: You didn’t finish, did you?

Ben: Huh?

Andrew: You didn’t finish did you?

Ben: No, I was reading really slowly, because I was trying to savor the moment.

Kevin: I was actually at Borders, in a local town, just hanging out, waiting for the book to be released.

Andrew: Oh.

Eric: You were?

Andrew: I, actually, if you read my About Us profile, I didn’t go anywhere. I was in Ocean City. I was sort of covering for MuggleNet.

Kevin: You were calling me.

Andrew: Oh yeah, that’s right. I was calling you 30 million times, wasn’t I?

Kevin: Yeah, that was an interesting night. We were the only ones that were actually near computers.

Andrew: Jamie, how long did it take you to read the book?

Jamie: I read it – I finished at 12:30 in the afternoon. So, we got back about quarter past 1:00 in the morning, then I stayed up and read it all the way through till half-12:00.

Andrew: I was sort of… I took my time, too, like Ben was saying. I took about a little under two days to read it.

Jamie: That’s not terrible.

Andrew: No, because, I didn’t touch MuggleNet that entire time that I was reading it, and I spent both days just reading, taking breaks in between stuff, because our mail and stuff…

Kevin: Oh my god, we were getting…

Andrew: …we’ve said this before. Our mail and stuff, it was just flooded with spoilers. It wasn’t worth it.

Kevin: It was horrible.

Andrew: So, that’s why I felt sort of forced to read it quickly like that,

Ben: Yeah, well…

Andrew: So, I could continue on MuggleNet.

Ben: What about Order of the Phoenix? How long did Order of the Phoenix take you guys to read?

Eric: Order of the Phoenix took me longer, I think. I forget, though.

Kevin: Oh, Order of the Phoenix took me, what was it? Eight hours? Nine hours?

Andrew: Jamie, didn’t you tell the…

Jamie: Yes I did, Andrew, thank you very much, yes I did.

[Andrew laughs]

Andrew: What? Explain it. Okay, finish

Jamie: Okay, I did an interview for the BBC, and I said:

[Audio]: Interviewer: How long do you think it would take you?

[Audio]: Woman: Well I’m not a very fast reader, and I know it’s a very big book, so it’ll be slower than my children.

[Audio]: Interviewer: Yes, and Jamie?

[Audio]: Jamie: Probably about four hours.

[Audio]: Interviewer: And when are you going to start?

[Audio]: Jamie: I think probably about two minutes past midnight, as soon as I get the book.

[Audio]: Interviewer: Just go straight through?

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: That was great.

Ben: That was great.

Jamie: Probably took me about three times that. But, I couldn’t say on air that I was thinking about maybe reading a bit, then going to McDonalds, then coming back and having a sleep, having a coffee…

Kevin: Because we’re all under the assumption, yeah.

Jamie: It just doesn’t sound right, does it? So I said yeah, yeah, about four hours. Absolute maximum, though, four hours.

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: Were you trying to impress the BBC or something?

Jamie: Well, no, no, I just couldn’t say that…

Kevin: I remember that one person was completely talking over you the whole time.

Jamie: She actually knew her stuff pretty well. She knew what she was talking about.

Ben: That video is on MuggleNet, isn’t it?

Kevin: It is, yeah.

Andrew: Yes, it is.

Ben: I put it up. I put it up.

Jamie: All right. It is then.

Kevin: But they were all under the assumption that you didn’t know anything about Harry Potter. It was great. She was completely talking over you, never giving you a chance to answer anything. It was great.

Ben: But that was pretty funny. I laughed so hard when you said four hours.

Voicemail – Parallels Between Book One and Book Seven

Andrew: Now it is time for this week’s voicemail segment. Kevin Steck, get them rolling.

[Audio]: Hi MuggleCast, this is Jason from Chicago, Illinois. I have a question. While I was listening to MuggleCast 46, Laura mentioned that she doubted Hermione was going to be the one to get killed off. That kind of jolted my memory back to oddly enough, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, when during the chess game, Ron sacrifices himself so Harry and Hermione could move on, and then Hermione kind of did the same by giving Harry the potion that would allow him to move on, as well. My question is, what are the odds that J.K. would do it again, in the sense that she would sacrifice Ron and Hermione so that Harry could survive, in this case? All right, love the show! Keep it up! Okay, bye!

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: No, I like that, though, because Laura was saying that the books are symmetrical. So, like in the beginning, Ron and Hermione had to drop out so that Harry could move on. Perhaps, in Book Seven, they have to drop out, only in a, how do I put it?

Jamie: Morbid sense.

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Morbid sense. Final sense. Final sense.

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: What do you guys think?

Eric: Sixth sense. No.

Kevin: I think it would be cool, the foreshadowing.

Andrew: Yes.

Jamie: Yeah, definitely.

Kevin: From Book One to Book Seven? I think that would be pretty cool.

Eric: Yeah, but, I don’t see why it’s a question. It’s been said now that eventually it has to be just Harry against Voldemort. So, they’re going to have to fall back – and they’re more than keen on just falling back and letting him take Voldemort. They want to help him out as much as they could, but they know they’re not going to actually be in the very, very, very final battle between Harry… You know? The prophecy says it just has to be Harry and Voldemort. So, they will drop back, they’ll fall back, but that doesn’t…

Jamie: It doesn’t, though. It just says that one has to kill the other. I mean, Hermione and Ron could hold him down while Harry kills him.

Kevin: It’s true.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: It just means that Harry has to kill him.

Andrew: Tickle him.

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Kevin: Yeah, but I think he’s trying to say that, do you think it’s possible that Ron is going to die for Harry, just like he sacrificed himself?

Jamie: Oh yeah. Of course, it is definitely possible.

Eric: I know, but it’s like the new hot topic right now. Who is going to die?

Jamie: Of course. It is definitely possible, yeah. One of them – I think everyone accepts that one of them will probably die, but I don’t think anyone is going to reach complete agreement until the book actually comes out, as to who’s going to die or not.

Kevin: Yep.

Eric: I don’t know why there’s all this favoritism, it’s almost as if you want Ron and Hermione to die.

Jamie: No, no, it’s not.

Eric: Just because the prophecy says that it has to be Harry and Voldemort at the final battle, doesn’t mean that Hermione and Ron won’t be perfectly fine, just back at home or something. They will fall back, they will not be in the absolute final battle. That doesn’t mean they have to die.

Kevin: I think the reason why people are thinking that is that it seems fitting that – she has killed off two father figures. She has never killed off one of his true friends, one of his childhood friends.

Jamie: She’s killed people close to him, but there’s a difference between being Dumbledore and being Ron. It’s a complete difference.

Eric: So, you’re saying that just because there’s this open void where she hasn’t killed a friend yet, she needs to kill a friend?

Andrew: No.

Jamie: Yes. No, no, but in some ways, yes, because it’s a war. They are all going into it together.

Eric: What will that teach him?

Jamie: It’s not teaching, it’s to make it realistic. It’s a battle, it’s a war. If three people go in against three people from their other side…

Eric: Ohhh!

Jamie: Three teenagers aren’t all going to come home nice, nice, and all completely alive. You know?

Voicemail – Impact of the Killing Curse

[Audio]: Hi, MuggleCast, this is Andrea calling from Vancouver, British Columbia, and I want to know what you think about something. On, one of the clues cited is that when Dumbledore is hit with Avada Kedavra, he is sent flying off of the Astronomy Tower. The site contends that this could not have been a real killing curse since in every other instance of Avada Kedavra we’ve seen, the victim simply slumps down onto the floor. However, I think there is evidence that the physical impact of any curse can be affected by the degree of emotion behind it. In Order of the Phoenix pg. 336, UK edition, Harry is hit with the Impedimenta Curse to stop him punching Malfoy and he is knocked over backwards by the force of this spell. Later, when practicing Impedimenta at a DA meeting, the victims are simply frozen for a minute or so – pg. 401, UK edition. So, if this were true, it would mean that if there were a lot of emotion behind Snape’s AK, which I think is evident in the description of hatred and revulsion in his face, then it is possible that the curse could have sent Dumbledore flying off the tower. Just wanted to hear what you thought. Thanks!

Jamie: I think, what she’s talking about is, do you remember in Order of the Phoenix, right at the end when Harry tried to use the Cruciatus Curse on Bellatrix, and he wasn’t thinking the right emotion, you know?

Kevin: Yeah.

Jamie: He was just angry, and you need to actually want to cause them pain. I think that’s right, because when Snape uses the killing curse on Dumbledore, it says that his face is screwed up in complete loathing. So, I think it must, the spell must be made more powerful by the kind of emotion behind you, because that’s like a running theme throughout the entire books, that magic isn’t only dependent on your wand and the spell. It’s dependent on the personality – the force behind it. So, I do think it’s made more powerful, yeah.

Eric: But again, I don’t think that any amount of force would have changed…

Jamie: Oh, the outcome, no, of course not.

Eric: Well, no or the fact that Dumbledore moved.

Jamie: Oh, no.

Eric: I don’t think, I actually don’t think that the fact that Dumbledore moved had anything to do with Snape being off…

Jamie: No, no.

Eric: …oupset with Dumbledore. I think the whole reason he moved was completely separate. The same kind of separate where…

Jamie: Because he was powerful.

Eric: Where people go up to Harry and say the only exception to the Death Curse…

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

Eric: …sits in front of you. It was something so vastly different, I don’t think it had anything to do with how upset…

Jamie: The thing is, saying that you can’t have degrees of killing curse – it either kills you or it doesn’t. So, perhaps that loathing, that anger, has to show itself in a different way. So, the body flying backwards a long way, or something like that, because if the body just lands and its eyes are wide and it’s being killed, you can’t tell how powerful the curse was that killed him. If that makes sense.

Eric: Well, it’s interesting, too, because they attribute Harry’s scar or at least Dumbledore attributes the actual scar to the Death Curse.

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

Eric: He doesn’t attribute it to Voldemort, exactly; otherwise there would be a lot more support for the Horcrux theory…

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: …of the scar. But Dumbledore actually says that the scar is a mark of the Death Curse. So, that’s really weird, because the Death Curse doesn’t usually leave a mark, he says, “The exception sits before me.” Or something along those lines, where Dumbledore…

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

Eric: …who is aware about Horcruxes at the time, actually says the Death Curse made the scar. So, maybe the Death Curse may behave differently depending on the people casting, but I just don’t know what to make about it. It’s like, we thought that – originally we speculated in the beginning couple of episodes, it was just the amount of power that Dumbledore had, that made an impact…

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: …because of how powerful – stuff like that.

Voicemail – The Ring

[Audio]: Hi MuggleCast. My name is Amanda, and I’m from New Jersey. I have a theory about the ring Horcrux that Dumbledore was wearing in Half-Blood Prince. The ring contains the Peverell coat of arms, and after researching Peverell, I found that the coat of arms contained a lion. Do you think this could be the real Gryffindor Horcrux? If so, it leaves open the possibility of a new Slytherin Horcrux, which might be easier to locate in the books. I’d love to know what you think. Thanks! Love your show!

Jamie: Mr. Gaunt is clearly very, very patriotic and sort of elitist. I doubt he would wear any ring that had any significance with Gryffindor or…

Eric: Yeah.

Jamie: …anything other than Slytherin considering his background. Unless, of course, he didn’t know, but I consider that unlikely.

Eric: Yeah, agreed. I don’t even remember that line.

Kevin: Yeah.

Eric: I just read that last week, but I don’t remember a lion being on the ring.

Jamie: Oh, no, no, it’s research that she did.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: Oh, research?

Jamie: Yeah, because Peverell relates to lions.

Eric: Oh, actually, well that’s kind of cool, but I do think Gaunt would have made sure. Or would have at least been – yeah.

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

Eric: And Dumbledore would probably be able to tell. I don’t know.

Chicken Soup For The MuggleCast Soul

Andrew: We’re going to wrap things up this week with a Chicken Soup. Jay, 20, of Ohio, writes:

“The other day at work during lunch I was wearing my MuggleCast t-shirt.”

Hey, everyone buy one today.

“My friend ‘Susie’…”

He put it in quotes, so I guess he’s trying to protect her identity.

“…said, ‘What’s the point in listening to MuggleCast. I understand you like reading but, come on, what do you learn from MuggleCast?’ Then yesterday after listening to the newest episode at work… I learned something… Jamie taught me what RSVP means! So, I went up to ‘Susie’ and said, ‘What does RSVP mean?’ And she didn’t know what. [Jamie laughs] And I said, ‘Well today, Jamie from MuggleCast taught me what it means. It means …'”


Jamie: Répondez s’il vous plaît.

Andrew: “See, you can learn from MuggleCast!”

Jamie: Yes.

Andrew: “So, thank you Jamie for helping me put that dizzy cow back in her place. You rock.” [laughs] Wow!

[Kevin laughs]

Eric: Every 47 episodes of MuggleCast, when we become an educational dispenser, we can prove dizzy cows wrong.

[Jamie laughs]

Eric: Jamie…

Favorite Moments Over Past 50 Episodes

Andrew: Well, that does it for us for this week’s show, but we have a few more little notes for everyone. Episode 50 is quickly approaching and we want your favorite MuggleCast moments and favorite quotes from the show sent in via our phone numbers, 1-218-20-MAGIC, and our two new phone numbers. In the United Kingdom you can call 020-8144-0677 and in Australia, 02-8003-5668. So, please send in your favorite moments and anything else that you would like to say about MuggleCast. We’re going to have a big block of voicemails at the end of Episode 50. We’re all going to be recording episode 50 in Vegas together, so that will be very interesting.

[Random woo-hoos]

Ben: I’ll be laying on the bed.

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: It’s going to be a lot of fun. And, next week, we are going to make our second attempt at MuggleCast Live. We have a new server. Huge, huge, huge, huge, huge, huge thanks to Jeremy. He’s been helping us out with this and he’s been really excited to get this going with us. So, next week, MuggleCast Live. Wednesday at 5:00 PM Eastern Standard Time. We’re going to have a lot of fun with it.

Jamie: What time is that my time?

Andrew: Ten? We’re going to have a lot of fun with it, and there’s a limit of 300 people who can access this feed. It’s not a SkypeCast this time, thank god.

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: For more information…

Ben: Thanks a lot Skype!

Andrew: Visit the MuggleCast website. Yeah. So, Ben, our P.O. Box is…


PO Box 223
Moundridge, Kansas, 67107.

Andrew: Send us stuff and you get your name on the show, and send your listener rebuttals, questions, comments, suggestions, complaints, whatever you want, to mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com. You can also find all our contact information on the MuggleCast website. Did I say staff at mugglecast dot com? I meant at mugglenet.

Ben: Staff dot muggle

Andrew: Dot com.

Jamie’s British Jokes of the Day

Andrew: Before we go anywhere…

Jamie: Okay, I haven’t done my joke.

Andrew: Jamie…

Jamie: Okay, so here’s a nice short one. A man walks into a doctor’s office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear, and a banana in his right ear. “What’s the matter with me?” he asks the doctor. The doctor replies, “You aren’t eating properly.”

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Actually, that was pretty good.

Ben: That’s going to destroy your rep, dude.

Jamie: Hey, it’s already downhill, considerably. I don’t think it can go any lower on the jokes.

Andrew: Well, Jamie, I just want to thank you real quick for coming through with your promise of doing two jokes.

Jamie: Well, thank you. I thought these people deserve two brand-new, previously unheard jokes, because I didn’t say any last week.

Andrew: Yeah, so, let’s hear…

Jamie: Okay, fine, well… So, there’s this guy, he’s like an international wasp expert. He knows absolutely everything about wasps. There is nothing on wasps he doesn’t know. One day he’s walking down the street. He walks past a CD store and he sees and advert that says, “The best tape of wasp sounds ever. Come in and listen.” Well, he thinks, “I’m the international wasp expert and I haven’t ever heard this tape, so how do they know it’s the best ever? I haven’t certified it.” So, he walks in and says to the person there, “Listen, do you know who I am? I’m the international wasp expert. Do you think I could listen to this tape and I can tell you if it is the greatest tape of wasp sounds ever.” So, the man says, “Well, yeah. Okay then.” So, he takes him over to the player and plugs him in, gives him the headphones, and presses play. The person listens and he thinks, “Well, I can’t hear any wasp sounds at all. What the hell is this?” So, he goes back to the store person and says, “Excuse me, but I couldn’t hear any wasp sounds at all, and you told me this was the greatest wasp sound tape ever.” So, the person says, “Come on then, I’ll go and try again.” So, he goes back, plugs him in, gives him the headphones, presses play and, once again, he can’t hear anything at all – any wasp sounds. And he’s getting extremely annoyed now, because he’s the international wasp expert, and he doesn’t have that much time on his hands. So, he goes back and says, “Now listen, you really do have to tell me now. Do you think you could please show me the wasp sounds?” So he says, “Yeah, well come on, then. We’ll go and try again.” And he goes back, and he says, “Right, do you think you can stay here now, so when it goes wrong, you can see what’s happening?” So, he plugs him in, gives him the headphones, presses play, and he listens to it, and he says, once again, “Well, I can’t hear any wasp sounds at all.” So, the store person stands there, and suddenly a look of dawning comprehension comes on his face and he says, “Oh, that’s why you can’t hear any wasp sounds. You’re listening to the “b” side.”

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Oh my god. That is excellent…

Jamie: Isn’t that the best ever?

Show Close

Andrew [Show Close with music in background]: On that note, I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Kevin: I’m Kevin Steck.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Eric: And I’m Eric Scull reminding you to save gas money.

Andrew: Ben Schoen, you’re in the studio here with me next week.

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: I cannot wait.

Ben: Monday morning, 5:43 AM, meet me at Wichita Mid-Continent Airport, okay? Everybody be there.

Andrew: Say goodbye.

Eric: Goodbye, everybody.

[Everyone says “goodbye”]


Andrew: Now, it is time for this week’s voicemail segment. Kevin Steck, get ’em rollin’.

Kevin: You roll them, I don’t have them on.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Oh man. Come on.

Kevin: I sent them to you.

Andrew: Oh geez. [imitates Kevin] Oh, I don’t have… You’re just too lazy to play them.

Kevin: No, I actually don’t have them.

Jamie: That concludes our voicemails for this week.

Kevin: I have them on my external hard drive, which is connected to a different computer.

Eric: Oh what, Kevin Steck is disconnected, now? He’s too…

Kevin: No.

Andrew: [puts on voice] Oh yeah, really connected Kevin. [becomes serious again] All right, here we go.


Written by: Micah, Allison, Ally, Eloise, Jessica, Margaret, Martina, Rhiannon, and Sarah