MuggleCast 134 Transcript
[Intro music begins]
Andrew: Hey, Mason, I really need a good gift for my generic loved one. Any ideas?
Mason: Oh yeah, Andrew. I have the gift they need. If you sign up for GoDaddy’s economy blogcast package you’ll receive one gig of disk space, 100 gigs bandwidth, recording tools, and much more!
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Mason: You’re wrong, Andrew. The blogcast economy package is just $4.49 a month for 12 months!
Andrew: That’s a deal! And a perfect way to get your own website, blog, or podcast started.
Mason: Oh, yeah! That is a deal! Plus enter code MUGGLE when you check out. Save an additional 10% on any order. Get your piece of the Internet at GoDaddy.com
[Show music begins]
Andrew: Because I’m a potty mouth, get ready for some bleepage, this is MuggleCast Episode 134 for March 1, 2008.
[Show music continues to play]
Andrew: Hi, everyone. Welcome back to the program. I just wanted to start the show off this week with a few e-mails I got about last week’s show. So let me kick it off here.
Jen, from New Jersey: “I just wanted to tell you that you accidentally dropped the F-bomb in Episode 133 at 59 minutes, 31 seconds. Just wanted to tell you so you can edit it out, or whatever.”
Ima Clone, from Nashville: “At 59, 30 of Episode 133, you dropped an F-bomb. Not very family friendly, as you mentioned earlier in the episode.”
Jessica B., 17 of Cobleskill, NY: “You said a very bad word during minute 59 and you missed it again. Woops, slipping up in your old age.”
Nick B., 13 of Boston: “I can’t believe you dropped an F-bomb on the show and didn’t cut it out. Can you believe this was my mom’s first show? Just kidding, but I thought I might point it out to you. Hahaha.”
Emily, 18 of Lynchburg College, Virginia: “Just FYI, Andrew, you dropped an F-bomb that made it through editing at 59:31 on Episode 133. Just thought you should know. Not really concerned, but thought you might be.”
From Matt: “Hey, Andrew, you accidentally forgot to edit yourself out saying” [beep] “around 50, 60 minutes into the show. It is not really noticeable, but I thought I would let you know.”
Holien: “You totally said” [beep] “on air at 59 minutes, 31 seconds. Oopsies!”
I know! I said the F word! Sorry! Argh!
Matt: What’s the…wait.
Laura: Now you know how I feel when you forget to edit me.
Matt: What’s the word? The F…Is it “fecal matter”?
Matt: Is it “frustrated”?
Andrew: Yes, Matt, whatever you say.
Matt: Oh, wait. It’s [beep].
[Elysa and Laura laugh]
Matt: You said [beep] on the show, Andrew? You’re not supposed to say [beep] on the show.
Laura: I can’t [beep]-ing believe you [beep] said that, you [beep] moron.
Elysa: [series of beeps]
Andrew: Guys, seriously, seriously. Shut the [beep] up.
[Laura and Andrew laugh]
Laura: Yeah, It’s really great when you produce a quality show and the only e-mails you get are about one slip up.
Andrew: Seriously, it was 99%, “59 minutes, 30 seconds you said the F- Bomb.” No, thanks, everyone, seriously, for e-mailing it in. I do appreciate it, though. [beep}
Andrew: I’m Andrew Sims.
Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.
Matt: [sings] “I am the walrus. CooCookachu! CooCookachu!” Matt Britton.
Elysa: And I’m Elysa Montford.
[Show music continues playing louder]
Andrew: Micah Tannenbaum is standing by in the MuggleCast News Center with the past week’s top Harry Potter news stories. Hey, Micah.
Andrew-imitating-Micah: Thanks, Andrew. To the discouragement of many, J.K. Rowling updated her official site earlier this week with a new entry to the “Rumors” portion of her site. She lets everyone know that all the J.K. Rowling profiles on popular social networking sites are fake. To quote, “I like to imagine them partying with my imaginary friends in some bright and shining alternative universe.”
And as most of you know, J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers are currently in a legal battle with RDR Books concerning a Potter Encyclopedia by the Harry Potter Lexicon. J.K.R. and WB are fighting the publication of the book, and just the other day, Jo submitted her declaration. In it she makes several statements about the fandom as a whole. As the AP reports, Rowling said she was especially irked that the site’s owner and the Lexicon’s would-be publisher, RDR Books, continue to insist that her acceptance of free, fan-based websites justified the efforts. To quote J.K. Rowling, “I am deeply troubled by the portrayal of my efforts to protect and preserve the copyrights I have been granted on the Harry Potter books.”
Apple’s iTunes Music Store recently added movies to its lineup of offerings, and this week they added Order of the Phoenix to their directory. You are now able to rent it for thirty days for $3.99. Once you start playing the movie, you have twenty-four hours to finish it. Sorcerer’s Stone through Goblet of Fire are also expected to be added to the store in the coming months.
And finally this week, happy birthday to Ron Weasley. J.K. Rowling updated her site with the news.
On a final note, Andrew Sims is awesome. That does it for this March 1, 2008 edition of MuggleCast. Back to the show.
News Discussion: Lois Lowry’s Slip-up
Andrew: All right, thank you, Micah. So, it was another slow news week. My roller coaster theory continues, as I tell everyone. I think really the only thing worth pointing out this week is that Lois Lowry updated her blog to apologize about her little slip-up. And this is really funny because she felt – and I felt bad reading this, and I knew she was going to feel bad as soon as she made that post. [laughs] She made an apology. She was flabbergasted at how the one little blurb on her site spread across the Internet, and that she also wrote to the film producer and she says, quote, “who was extremely gracious, more than I deserved, in her reply.” What do you guys think? Isn’t it amazing how she feels so guilty now? I feel bad for her.
Matt: Well, yeah.
Laura: Yeah, I mean, I guess you look – and The Giver is a great book. I mean, wonderful, but the circulation of The Giver is nowhere near the level of Harry Potter. So I guess she wasn’t expecting that her blog was going to be as widely read as it ended up being.
Andrew: Yeah, right. All you need is one Harry Potter fan to be following that blog, and you’re done for.
Laura: It’s like the domino effect, seriously.
Andrew: Yeah. Yeah. So that was interesting. That’s really the only thing that happened this week, and we’re just still waiting for this announcement from Warner Brothers to be like, “Okay, movie’s split in two and David Yates is the director.” I mean it’s out now.
Andrew: So just tell us already before more people leak it. And like we have been saying, once that announcement is made we will be doing a live show to talk about the developments that Warner Brothers announces. Of course we’ve already sort of talked about them, but we’ll hold off on any more discussion until our live show, which we’re really excited to do, because we haven’t done one in awhile. It will also be Matt’s first, and Elysa, if you’re around, you can be on.
Andrew: Your first live show, interact with the fans.
Andrew: The pickle lovers.
Matt: It’s going to be my first time.
MuggleCast News Entries
Andrew: Your first time. Your first time. Speaking of news, last week we stared a contest with Micah to find a couple people to read the news for a week. We have the top five entries, Micah has picked out the top five entries, and we’re going to play them for you right now, and then you will be able to vote in a poll, so let’s take a listen to those five entries right now.
Entry 1 Audio: This is [unintelligible] reporting on this week’s top Harry Potter news. J.K. Rowling updated her website to wish Ron Weasley a happy March 1st birthday. She also made a new post to her “Rumors” section to dispel the notion that any of the J.K. Rowling profiles on social networking websites, such as MySpace or Facebook, is actually her. In sporting news, the all girls Rosary High School in Fullerton, California now has a three team Quidditch league. Their teams, The Basilisks, Phoenixes, and They Who Must Not Be Named, have already met on the pitch, though there is no word on whether they plan to go toe-to-toe with their east coast Quidditch counterparts. Back to you in the studio.
Entry 2 Audio: This week’s episode of the Harry Potter podcast welcomes a new host, MuggleNet FanFiction’s Elysa Montford, who is also celebrating her 21st birthday. It’s a six person panel and discusses the latest Deathly Hallows film developments, continues to analyze the Deathly Hallows book, and much more. Elysa Montford is in good company this week, as Weasley twins James and Oliver Phelps celebrated their 22nd birthday this past Monday, as well as actor Timothy Spall who turns 51 today. That’s all the news for this February 27, 2008 submission to MuggleCast.
Entry 3 Audio: [Harry Potter theme in background] Daniel Radcliffe has gotten two of the top theater awards at the WhatsOnStage.com Theater Goer’s Choice Awards for his West End debut in Equus. Radcliffe described playing the role of Alan Strang as “one of the greatest experiences of my life.” Also, Happy Birthday to actor Timothy Spall who portrays Peter Pettigrew in Harry Potter films as he celebrates his 51st birthday today. My name is Thomas Lian and this was the Harry Potter news for February 27.
Entry 4 Audio: Hello, MuggleCasters, this is Becca Shistler reading your news. J.K. Rowling continues her crusade against caged children. According to a report by The Sun, J.K. Rowling is teaming up with Gordon Brown and his wife Sarah to stop instances of caging children in Romania. Gordon Brown will meet with Calin Popescu-Tariceanu while Jo Rowling will meet with Sarah Brown in an attempt to better the situation. Jo is very passionate about this cause.
Entry 5 Audio: All right, thanks, Andrew. Rupert Grint who plays Ron Weasley in the Potter films has recently shaved his head. Producer David Heyman comments, “Well, it certainly was a shock, and although he still looks as hot, as the fangirls would say, as ever, we’re not sure if we can have a Ron Weasley without red hair.” And one final announcement: I’d like to wish Emerson Spartz a very Happy 21st Birthday. We all love him very much. That’s all the news for this February 26th, 2008. Back to the show.
Andrew: Okay, so visit MuggleCast.com for a poll on the right side of the page, and you’ll be able to vote for your favorite entry. I hope everyone took a lot of time considering everyone, giving everyone a fair chance, and vote for your favorite news anchor to replace Micah for a week, and then I think we’re going to two people; one person one week and then one the next, so…that should be fun.
Matt: Yeah. I’m excited.
Matt: [laughs] Heyho!
Announcement: Vote for us on Podcast Alley
Andrew: Heyho! Hey, Matt, it’s a new month, it’s March now. Do you know what that means?
Matt: I know it is. March Madness?
Andrew: Yeah. For all the Harry Potter fans, what does that mean?
Laura: March Madness?
Matt: I don’t know. Oh, Oh! I don’t know.
Andrew: [laughs] It is a new month, which means vote for us on Podcast Alley. As everyone should know, Podcast Alley is a big directory of podcasts, and they have a top ten list, and you guys get us up there on the top ten by voting once a month. It’s simple. You just put in your e-mail address, you press vote, then you get an e-mail from Podcast Alley, they say “verify your vote,” you verify it, and you’re done. And the reason…
Matt: That’s awesome.
Andrew: …we like asking you all to vote is because we like to stay high up on that list, so people looking to find out more about podcasts, check out some new ones, or like if a reporter is doing a story on podcasting, and they go to that site and find out more. And see that MuggleCast is one of the top shows.
Matt: Well actually, Andrew Sims, where are we located on the Podcast Alley? Where are we ranked on the top ten for February?
Andrew: I don’t know, Matt Britton. Do you have the list up? I’m loading it right now.
Matt: I actually do. It is actually number four.
Andrew: Oooo. That’s pretty good.
Matt: Under Keith and the Girl and Nobody Likes Onions.
Andrew: And Blast to the Right…
Andrew: …which I think is a political – yeah it’s a political podcast. I guess Laura and Elysa would like that. Kick right-wing butt? Yeah, that sounds like something…
Laura: Yeah, I’d be all over that.
Andrew: You should join up.
Matt: [sings] Everyone to the left, to the left, everything you own in the box to the left.
Announcement: Plans for Boston and Baltimore
Andrew: Spring tour! We announced this a couple weeks ago, a few weeks ago. Probably a month ago now at this point. And we said we were working on it, so you guys knew. And it turns out… [blows raspberry] …not happening. We tried to get a couple book chains on with us, and neither of them want to do it right now because nothing is really happening in terms of Harry Potter.
Matt: Are we really not doing it?
Andrew: We’re not doing the full five-stop tour.
Matt: Oh, okay. Yeah.
Andrew: Yeah. However, we are looking into the possibility of doing just two stops. And we decided on Boston and Baltimore. Now keep in mind nothing’s official, we are going to have to push the date back, but we are going to try to do these two stops and try to do a little weekend tour sometime in mid to late April. I think at this point that would be our best bet since we want to give people an ample amount of time to plan. So we’re asking for anyone in the Boston and Baltimore area – we know you guys want to come, you’ve voted on the poll already. If you have any connections to anyone like a library or a bookstore that would be willing to host a podcast that would hold 400 to 500 people we’re looking at, about, for each one of these. E-mail me; andrew at staff dot mugglenet dot com, and let me know, and if you hook us up with a good venue we’ll buy you lunch or buy you dinner. Take you out – take you out to dinner. Dinner with the MuggleCasters.
Matt: How about a T-shirt?
Andrew: You pay for tip though. Yeah, sure. A T-shirt too.
[Elysa and Laura laugh]
Announcement: Team Effort
Andrew: And lastly, on the announcements today, we just wanted to take a moment. Sometimes, we like to make public service announcements here on the show. And now we’re talking about something else. Right, Laura?
Laura: Mhm. Yeah, actually, Mason Dewitt, everyone’s favorite GoDaddy guy, has started a Relay for Life team called Team Effort.
Matt: [imitating Mason’s ad] Oh, yeah.
Laura: [laughs] For those of you who aren’t aware, Relay for Life is run by the American Cancer Association to raise funds for cancer research and cure. Anyway, Mason’s goal is to raise $5000 for his team. So I think we can put that link in the show notes, Andrew, I believe?
Andrew: Yeah. We’re going to make a post on MuggleCast.com with a link to where you can donate.
Laura: Yeah, and, honestly, it’s such a great cause and I mean I completely relate to not having tons and tons of money to throw at charitable causes. I myself put in ten dollars. I’m hoping to put in more as time goes on. I understand the perspective of being a poor college student, but really, the minimum donation that counts is five dollars. Every little bit helps, and cancer is something that affects so many people. I know that it runs rampant in my family, and there are several other people I know who have been personally affected by it, so…
Laura: …it’s definitely something we need to be concerned about.
Andrew: I give Mason a lot of credit for this, because he has been really – he’s really been pushing this with all of his friends. He’s been getting his friends on Facebook to help spread the word, on blogs to spread the word, and he came to us, and he does – he puts in his time with the show doing ads for MuggleCast, and we really appreciate that, so we are more than happy to help him out with this, and a really great cause. And, you know, it’s 100% safe. This is going straight to the American Cancer Association, so there’s no doubts about where the money’s going. It is all legit. Again, visit MuggleCast.com for a link, and thank you to everyone who donates. We all appreciate it a lot.
Muggle Mail: No One Cares About the Fans
Andrew: Let’s move on to Muggle Mail. We have three e-mails this week.
Matt: Our first mail comes from Dan, age 15, from Michigan. Dan writes:
“I’m sorry, but I cannot resist e-mailing you guys now about the movies. You guys have been bugging me a lot lately on the podcast when you talk about the films. I’m really not trying to be mean, but here it goes. How naive are you? Do you honestly think that the makers of the films care at all about whether the fans like the films or not? They honestly don’t care about splitting the seventh film into two. Of course it’s about making money. Perhaps a couple people here or there might actually want to do it for the fans, but to get approval from Warner Brothers, it’s just to make money guys. Additionally, does anyone actually like the movies? Well, obviously you guys do. They are really childish. They have stupid jokes and are made terribly, not only from a reader’s standpoint but also from the view of someone looking for a good movie. Just putting my two cents.”
That was from Dan.
Andrew: [laughs] I love how you like to add your own personality to these e-mails.
Andrew: [laughs] It’s funny. I agree with this guy. I think he makes a good point.
Andrew: Well, let me say this. I mean he’s right. The big wigs at Warner Brothers are ultimately making the decisions and, let’s face it, what are they in it for?
Matt: Of course they are in it for money.
Matt: But it’s kind of an extreme to think that it’s just all to make money. Because come on, guys, honestly, the people who have been working on this series for ten years, do you honestly think they don’t put into account about the fans being happy about it?
Andrew: I think with the seventh movie they do care. And I think they care personally because it is the final one. This is their last chance to recreate one of the books, so I think that’s why they want to put extra care in it, because once it’s done, it’s done forever. Chances are there won’t ever be a Harry Potter remake, so, you know, I think they feel they have this project really close to their hearts, because imagine, like you said Matt, they have been working on it for ten years and now it’s over.
Andrew: They want to make something special.
Matt: Well, they know they screwed us with the other films, too.
Andrew: Right. [laughs]
Laura: Well, I mean, do you really feel confident that they would never do a Harry Potter remake? They did a remake of Narnia.
Andrew: I would say in the next fifty years.
Matt: Fifty years. Wow!
Laura: It would be a while down the road, but there was originally Narnia movies make in the eighties.
Matt: Yeah, but that was from like the BBC.
Laura: Oh, was it? BBC? Really?
Andrew: I think Harry Potter’s different because it’s, you know, it’s what it is. We’ve never seen anything like it before. That’s the other problem, too. With a fandom this popular, with a series this popular, I just can’t see it being remade. I don’t know. It – maybe.
Matt: I’m sure it will be remade, but just not now.
Laura: Yeah, I mean, they could make tons of money off a remake. Seriously.
Andrew: Of course.
Laura: But what I’m curious about is that I don’t remember when we ever explicitly said that Warner Brothers was doing this for the fans.
Matt: We didn’t.
Andrew: Well, we sort of did, because David Barron said that’s what the fans want. The fans want a movie and…
Laura: Well, I mean, it’s a win-win. The fans want it and they’re going to make more money off of it.
Laura: So I don’t really see what the debate is.
Matt: And it’s kind of – I don’t think it’s naive for us to think that the makers of the film don’t care if the fans like it or not.
Andrew: I completely disagree with that, sir, Dan, 15, of Michigan, and I’ll debate you on that. That’s disgusting. I mean the people who work on this crew are dedicated to the films. And I don’t think Dan has ever seen a video interview with these guys. They’re passionate about it.
Matt: He’s only 15, Andrew.
Andrew: I know. Nah, we have to be nice. We’re not trying to be mean. We’re just playing around.
Muggle Mail: Tombstone Inscription
Laura: The next MuggleMail comes from Kara, 17, of Georgia. She writes:
“The meaning of “the last enemy to be destroyed is death,” which comes from Corinthian 15:26 can be found in Revelation 20:14. The death in Hades was thrown into the Lake of Fire. The Lake of Fire is the second death. When the new Heaven and Earth are created there won’t be anymore death, and when anyone whose name is written in the Book of Life will forever be with God in the new Heaven and Earth. The Book of Life contains the names of everyone who put their trust in Jesus to forgive their sins and anyone who was too young when they died to understand that. Frankly, I thought it was strange that you could talk as extensively as you did about the quote on the tombstone and never, that I heard, mention this quote in Revelation.”
Well, I’m not going to lie. I’m not well studied on the Bible. I know some basic – and I do know things about it. I am in a paradise study class right now. I’m not completely ignorant. But when I saw the quote in
the book I – something clicked in my mind, and I realized it was biblical and I went and looked it up in the context in which it was presented. So I didn’t think to go look anywhere else within it, and I’m sorry about that.
Andrew: You’re so sweet.
Laura: Thanks. I’m assuming that Kara is well studied in this subject if she was writing in with it, but this can certainly be interpreted differently.
Matt: Well dang, how many deaths are there?
Laura: [laughs] Well, Matt…
Matt: The Lake of Fire? Were there stages, like in those cartoons when they fall down a building and they just keep hitting those little shutters one by one by one by one?
Elysa: Well, like Dante’s Inferno, right?
Elysa: Dante’s Inferno has a bunch of different levels of Hades and stuff like that.
Laura: Yeah. So that’s definitely an interpretation…
Matt: I’m pretty…
Laura: …of what that could mean, but – I don’t know. I’m not sure that – I mean Jo definitely used a biblical quote, we know she’s a religious person, but I’m not sure she was using it so literally.
Matt: Hades was in the Bible? I didn’t know that.
Laura: Well, it was – I’ll explain later.
Matt: Oh, okay. This is so exciting.
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Laura: What the hell? I forgot what I was going to say, but I don’t think that Jo was literally trying to say that Lily and James weren’t in the Lake of Fire? I don’t know.
Matt: Were they really religious, either?
Laura: Yeah, I mean we don’t even know that, so…
Andrew: I agree.
Laura: I think it was meant to be more of a literary context.
Muggle Mail: Make the Music Connection
Elysa: Aaron, 15, from Washington says:
“Hey, MuggleCast, I was listening to a past episode where you played Make the Music Connection, and Andrew was talking about how he didn’t know what Billy Joel’s “Only the Good Die Young” was about. The song is about a Catholic girl who spends her life doing exactly what she’s told. The narrator of the song is trying to convince her to have some fun because living a dull, unfulfilling life is just as bad as dying. Also, I found a really good place for “Yesterday.” I was thinking that it could go in the last bit of “Order of the Phoenix” right after Dumbledore tells Harry the contents of the prophecy.”
Andrew: Ah, that’d be good.
Elysa: Yeah, it would.
Andrew: We’ll be playing more Make the Connections later today in the show. I’m really excited about that. A lot of people have been e-mailing in ideas and such, so thanks, everyone.
Andrew: Keep doing that.
Elysa: I’m interested to see what you come up with this time, Andrew.
Laura: Yeah, me too.
Matt: Anymore Hannah Montana?
Andrew: No! No Hannah Montana!
Andrew: I’m saving that for the live show – for some show – for some music during the show.
Elysa: That was a big hit.
Matt: Yeah, it was.
Elysa: Everyone on the forums was all about it. They were saying, “Andrew likes Hannah Montana?”
Andrew: Oh, yeah. [laughs] It’s like when I blew everyone away in England in the live show when I started playing Spice Girls on my iPhone.
Laura: Oh, yeah. I remember that.
‘Shipping on the MuggleCast Forums
Laura: Oh, man, I’ve seen some interesting things on the forums lately. Have you guys been browsing it?
Andrew: No, I haven’t, but for more visit MuggleCastFan.net/Forums!
Matt: Oh, yeah.
Laura: Please don’t write fanfiction.
Laura: I’m just kidding!
Elysa: Laura! Laura, I’m hurt.
Laura: I’m just kidding. I just won’t read it.
Elysa: You’re breaking my heart.
Matt: Is it – is it really even fanfiction though? It sounds more like ‘shipping than it is fanfiction.
Laura: Yeah, it’s – it’s all ‘shipping, basically. They sit there and come up with random ‘ships of all the hosts.
Laura: And then they write stories about it.
Andrew: I like it.
Matt: It’s complete ‘ships.
Elysa: Good one.
Laura: Although, I have to say, I appreciated the one that had me getting Johnny Depp inebriated and then taking advantage of him.
Matt: That’s hot. Yeah.
Elysa: I didn’t read that one.
Matt: Well – and it seems to be – there’s this popular catchphrase that’s going around how, I guess, there’s a Lucky Charms thing with Jamie or something?
Elysa: Magically delicious.
Matt: Yes! Magically delicious.
Elysa: Magically delicious! Yeah.
Matt: That’s kind of weird.
[Laura and Matt laugh]
Chapter-by-Chapter: Chapter 18, “The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore”
Andrew: All right, so we have some fun segments planned for today, but first we’re going to get right into Chapter-by-Chapter. We’re covering two more chapters this week.
Matt: Yes, we are.
Andrew: This week we are going to touch on Chapters 18 and 19, “The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore,” and also “The Silver Doe.” [sings] “A deer, a female deer.”
Matt: [sings] A female deer. Yeah!
Andrew: Oh yeah!
Matt: [imitating Mason] Oh yeah, Andrew. Oh, yeah. A doe!
Andrew: What is going on this week? Okay! So Chapter 18, “The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore.”
Matt: Who’s Alice Dumbledore?
Andrew: Albus, I said.
Andrew: Albus Dumbledore. In this chapter, quick, short summary: They get – Harry and Hermione get their hands on a copy of The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore. They learn about the man in the picture was Gellert Grindelwald, and Rita Skeeter reported in the book that Gellert – is that how you pronounce his name? I hope so.
Elysa: Yeah, that’s how I’ve been saying it.
Laura: Well, yeah. It’s German, so it might be somewhat different, but…
Angry at Rita Skeeter
Andrew: Gellert was very close to Albus Dumbledore for a time when they were young. And so we’ll get right into it this week. Harry is very emo in the start of this chapter because of his wand and what was such a shame – and I was feeling for Harry because in the beginning, he makes the realization that that wand was what saved him from Voldemort because they both had the same cores.
Laura: So after Harry stops being emo about his wand breaking, Hermione comes over, and she has a copy of The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore. It has a note inside of it from Rita Skeeter and it says, “Dear Batty,” to Bathilda, “thanks for the help. Here’s a copy of the book. Hope you like it. You said everything even if you don’t remember it. Rita.” And I read that and I’m just like, “You are a big bitch.”
Andrew: What do you think Rita did to her?
Laura: Oh, I’m sure she put some kind of memory charm on her.
Elysa: Well, she admits that used Veritaserum, right?
Andrew: Did she? Was that later in the book? I vaguely remember that.
Elysa: No, I’m almost positive. Yeah, I’m pretty sure it said somewhere…
Matt: I’m kind of with Elysa on this. I do kind of vaguely remember something like that.
Elysa: Oh, no wait! Actually, yes, she does. It’s in the article itself. She says, “for the use of Veritaserum,” or something, and reporting stuff. God only knows. I’m looking for it right now.
Matt: Okay. We’ll just say Veritaserum for now.
Elysa: We’ll just say I’ m right. You know, whatever.
Andrew: Yeah, of course.
Matt: Why not?
Matt: You get one anyway.
Andrew: But yeah, I was happy that we had one last chance to get angry at Rita Skeeter before the series ended.
Elysa: Oh! I found it!
Elysa: Okay, sorry. Page 355 in the American version, hardback, it says, “On one subject, however, Bathilda was well worth the effort I put into procuring Veritaserum, for she, and she alone, knows the full story of the best kept secret of Albus Dumbledore’s life.” So yeah, that was definitely at least part of how she got her answers.
Andrew: Hm. Yeah.
Matt: Oh, that’s mean.
Andrew: Thank you for clearing that up, Elysa.
Elysa: [laughs] No problem!
MuggleCast 134 Transcript (continued)
Andrew: Then we also found out that Bathilda had an interest in trans-species Transfiguration, which was kind of ironic seeing as she transformed into a snake.
Matt: So is that like cross-breeding but for magic?
Matt: Trans-species Transfiguration. What does that mean?
Elysa: I would assume that means that you’re taking an animal and transfiguring it into a different species of like…
Matt: Or combining two species or something?
Andrew: Well, because we’re species, so technically we’re turning into a different species, so…
Matt: Oh, okay.
Andrew: You know what I mean?
Dumbledore and Grindewald’s Relationship
Matt: Sure. Will we find out that, actually, old Bathilda, or as I like to call her, Old Bat, or Old Batty – her great nephew turns out to be the infamous…Grindlewald?
Andrew: Who cares though, honestly?
Matt: He was a bad guy.
Elysa: Well, go for it, Andrew. Say what you really think! Who cares?
Andrew: Not me.
Matt: Well, we also find out that Grindlewald and Dumbledore did have a budding relationship.
Andrew: Yeah, see, now this is what I wanted to talk about.
Laura: Oh God.
Matt: See, I wanted to talk about this too.
Elysa: Oh boy.
Matt: Let’s talk about it [whispering] together.
Andrew: [laughs] Is this what J.K. Rowling – was this J.K. Rowling’s one and only, like, sort of hint? One and only clue, even though it’s not really even a clue, that Dumbledore was gay?
Matt: Are you still on that gay thing with Dumbledore?
Laura: I don’t think she was trying to leave hints in the books that he was gay. I don’t think it matters.
Andrew: I don’t think so either, but I just find it interesting that when you read back on it now that it’s a little more interesting. I don’t know.
Elysa: No, I agree with you, Andrew.
Andrew: Thank you.
Matt: He had a best friend who was the same sex as him. So does Harry.
Elysa: Yeah, but it does seem interesting, though. I think that – I mean the fact that he waited, I think it said five years before he actually felt like facing him – Dumbledore facing Grindlewald? Like I think that – why would he want to wait so long if it was just a really brief friendship, if it was just, you know, a two month, “Hey, how are you doing? We’re great friends and now something terrible happens and, you know, we never speak again.” I think that it was probably something really awkward and romantic there in order for Dumbledore to be avoiding that so terribly.
Matt: I can – I can probably…
Laura: That’s a good point.
Matt: Yeah. [sighs] What I love about the whole Dumbledore and Grindlewald friendship is its parallel to a bunch of the heroes/villains in the comic books. Such as, like, from the story of Superman – Lex Luther and Superman – Clark Kent used to best friends when they were children, or when they were in school.
Andrew: Yeah, that’s true.
Matt: And then they turned out to be mortal enemies.
Andrew: I think…
Elysa: Good parallel.
Andrew: Why is that?
Matt: [gasps] They never meet!
[Elysa and Laura laugh]
Andrew: Is it just the classic superhero irony? Like they always started as friends, but then turn out to be worst enemies because there’s always that one little thing they always competed for? The enemy, in the end, was always the one who didn’t win.
Matt: I think it’s also – I guess it all exemplifies the fact that they’re more like equals, and they possibly know enough about each other to find their weaknesses.
Laura: But, Matt, kind of going off on what you were saying, what’s interesting about the relationship between Dumbledore and Grindelwald that’s kind of different than some of the parallels you’ve just mentioned is that they both originally had the same view, and it wasn’t a good one.
Laura: It was that whole idea that wizards should rule over Muggles for the greater good.
Matt: Okay, I have something to say off that too, Laura. I’m sorry, you finished? I didn’t mean to interrupt you.
Laura: Yeah, I just kind of bringing up that point that Dumbledore wasn’t originally good.
Matt: Well, this also goes to another comic book, X-Men with Magneto and Professor Xavier. They both want mutant rights, but they both go about it differently. You know what I mean?
Laura: But rights are different than…
Matt: I’m saying they both had the same views.
Matt: They both wanted the same goals, they just went about it differently, and I think that Dumbledore and Grindelwald share the same passion. It’s just I think that Grindelwald had more of a like a Slytherin attribute where he would do anything just to boost himself, and I think that Dumbledore, as he got older, he started to realize that it’s not really all about him, and he has more compassion than he thought, like the compassion to love.
Laura: Yeah, and I mean I also think Dumbledore came to his senses and realized that the whole philosophy they’d been holding when they were younger was wrong.
Matt: Possibly. He was probably just trying to do it to be – to show off to Grindelwald or something.
Elysa: This is – this is going to be a real stretch, and I don’t know if this would make any sense to you guys, but I was thinking that maybe part of the reason that Dumbledore went along with this – maybe he sort of had these ideas and sort of experimenting with ideology and where he stands with certain issues, and then Grindelwald came along, and he was sort of the force that pushed him over the edge. He was influence, he just sort of succumbed to peer pressure. And that was just – so then once Grindelwald was out of his life he sort of reverted back to questioning things a bit more.
Matt: Well, he probably…
Laura: Yeah, and I think you’re right to say that. Sorry, Matt. I think you’re right to say that, because, not to jump too far ahead, but in the King’s Cross chapter, when Harry’s sort of in that world of limbo between life and death, doesn’t Dumbledore say something about being infatuated with Grindelwald?
Elysa: Yes, he does.
Matt: Yes, he does actually.
Elysa: Which again is a play to the – Andrew’s original idea that maybe there’s something more going on there. That that was the hint that J.K Rowling had always alluded to, and it would also explain why someone as strong willed as Albus Dumbledore would succumb to peer pressure. Of course the average person would succumb much easier if you have a crush or are in love with someone or, as Dumbledore puts it, an infatuation.
Matt: I think it’s definitely more of an infatuation than anything.
Elysa: Right, I agree.
Matt: I think he just – I’m sure that Grindelwald was pretty persuasive, and he pretty much made his beliefs pretty – what’s the word I’m trying to think of? Make it very…
Elysa: He had strong convictions?
Matt: Yeah. And he made it sound so great and so reachable, and I bet he could’ve said like, “We could do it together,” and, you know, “we can be the best team.”
Elysa: Right. Well, that makes total sense because think about it. He has Aberforth at home, who he was – and even if he got along with him they weren’t the best of friends. Or according to the reports, of course, the Rita Skeeter article. But then I think it says also that his best friend at school was Doge, right?
Elysa: Yeah, and the book describes Doge as being really [unintelligible] and slow and whatnot, so maybe, you know, maybe Grindelwald was sort of meeting his match, and that’s why he became infatuated. He’d been surrounded by these lesser intellectuals his entire life. And so when he finally met his match he was like, “Whoa.”
Matt: Mhm. And you know whenever you find something that you really – you really connect with, sometimes it becomes addicting and you become infatuated with it, which is probably what he did with Grindelwald.
Matt: He probably took it too far and he let his guard down to Grindelwald.
Elysa: I agree, I agree.
Andrew: And do you – now do you think this is why – we also find out Dumbledore didn’t intervene with Grindelwald’s – you know, the mayhem he started causing for five years. Why do you think he waited? Do you think it was because of that infatuation?
Matt: I think that he felt – I think this was like a transformation point for him when he was looking at all the things that Grindelwald was doing. And he was probably searching his soul seeing if he’s the kind of person that can do that. Kind of like with Harry and the Unforgivable Curses. He knows – Harry knows that he can’t produce those kind of spells, and I think Dumbledore found what kind of person he really was, and he wasn’t the person that he kept portraying himself to Grindelwald for.
What Happened to Ariana?
Laura: Yeah, I agree with that. So we know that Ariana was attacked by a group of Muggles and that, essentially afterward, at the least the impression that I got of it, was that she pretty much kind of crawled back into her shell and never was able to practice magic again.
Matt: Well, if she wasn’t allowed to practice magic, I mean she was being attacked by Muggles, and isn’t it…
Laura: No, no, no.
Matt: …a rule that underage wizards can defend themselves with magic when they’re being attacked?
Laura: But I don’t think she was of age to have attended Hogwarts.
Andrew: She was only six.
Laura: I don’t think she was old enough to do anything.
Matt: Oh, she’s only six, okay. That’s what I was wondering.
Laura: But, you know, I’m almost wondering what exactly happened to her, because just the vagueness with which it’s described almost sounds like a sexual assault to me.
Elysa: I agree.
Laura: Like – and just the idea – and like afterwards she didn’t do magic anymore, she was no longer magical, it just seems like they came and robbed her of that somehow.
Matt: It does make sense.
Laura: And the first thing that comes to my mind was she was sexually assaulted.
Matt: It does definitely make sense because she does have this kind of attributes that happens to a victim of a sexual assault.
Laura: Yeah, because afterwards she, you know, isolates herself.
Laura: And also her family wants to protect her, you know, her mom keeps her inside all the time after that. But then what’s interesting is that later, in the passage from Rita Skeeter’s book, she bascially tries to imply that Dumbledore killed his sister because maybe she stumbled onto something she shouldn’t have seen. And she even says, “Is it possible that Ariana Dumbledore was the first person to die for the greater good?” And it’s just – you know, it’s just another one of those moments where you read it, and having known Dumbledore through six books, the idea that anyone would even suggest that he would kill his sister just infuriates you!
Elysa: No, I sort of – I thought maybe that Grindelwald had done it, whether inadvertently or otherwise, and that maybe that was the reason that they never spoke again. And maybe…
Laura: Oh no, I agree with you, but what Rita Skeeter is trying to imply in her book is that Ariana died for Dumbledore’s cause, that he was somehow responsible for it, and that just irks me.
Matt: Well, whatever happened – well, whatever happened in Ariana’s death had to have made Dumbledore feel at guilt, so it can’t just have been that one incident, because…
Laura: What incident?
Matt: Or unless – do you think Dumbledore blames himself for not being there when she was attacked?
Laura: No, no, no. What happened was he – what was it? He, Grindelwald, and I think it was Aberforth, all got into a fight.
Matt: Oh, that’s right.
Laura: And then Ariana stumbled into the middle of it. So one of them killed her, but they’re not 100 percent sure who. But what I was just talking about was that Rita Skeeter speculated that, and basically tried to imply, that Dumbledore purposefully killed his sister, which is ridiculous.
Matt: Yeah. Okay, I remember that now.
Andrew: But that’s naturally what Rita should do. I mean it’s not like we should be too surprised by that, but…
Laura: I know.
Andrew: Were you trying to make a certain point with that?
Laura: No, no, no. I was just saying that it was irksome.
Andrew: Yeah. Oh that Rita. That’s about it for that chapter.
Andrew: The just find out about their family.
Dumbledore’s Character as a Whole
Elysa: Well, I kind of wanted to touch on – I remember – okay, I remember when I was first reading this book I actually had Jess, I’m sure you guys remember Jess, with me at Chickahominey, and we were reading this, and she finished this chapter, and she was like, “I’m vindicated!” Like, “This is what I’ve been saying all along.” You, everyone who’s listening, knows about Jess and her anti-Dumbledore theories and what-not. So I kind of…
Andrew: Just for you listeners, she was on an episode way, way back, and she was – she just kept proclaiming about how much she hated Dumbledore. [laughs] But go on, go ahead.
Elysa: So anyway, I was just – I just wanted to comment on – on that because I think it’s not just her. A lot of people sort of, you know, became disenchanted with Dumbledore, and I think this is the chapter that really drilled that in at least originally. But Hermione says on page 361, “Harry, I’m sorry but I think the real reason you’re so angry is that Dumbledore never told you any of this himself.” And I really think that’s right. I mean speaking of the angry, emo Harry – But I mean don’t get me wrong, of course I can’t blame Harry for feeling betrayed or deceived or anything. I mean it was a shock to me to read Dumbledore’s note to Grindelwald, and I think it’s perfectly fair for anyone who had read this to have felt disenchanted with Dumbledore, but there’s little doubt in my mind that he lost a lot of wisdom points, so to speak, in this chapter because we saw how terribly overwhelming Harry’s situation was and how Dumbledore really added to that. But after the initial upset you sort of have to concede many points to Hermione. Like, she sort of goes into a spiel about “actions speak louder than words” and Dumbledore’s actions have always aligned with his admirers’ perceptions of him, and as she points out he more than redeems himself later in life by voting for Muggle rights as part of the Wizengamot, fighting to bring down Voldemort from the start, and a whole host of other things. And I mean I think it’s clear that he had a lapse in judgment, he was really young and everything, but I think that that only makes him more realistic. My argument, ultimately, in terms of the anti-Dumbledore sentiment, is just that if anything, learning all of this about Dumbledore made him more human as opposed to merely a character.
Elysa: And if he’s human and well and truly human, flaws and temporarily senselessness included, it makes all of his accomplishments, his ideology, and his principal behavior 100 times more admirable and worthy of respect. So, essentially, I mean I think that – I think it probably added to Dumbledore’s character reasons to like him because it made him feel more personable, we could relate to him more.
Elysa: And especially – especially, sometimes people have to fall from grace in order to learn the critical lessons and gain the sort of wisdom that Dumbledore had, and I mean, he was no exception. So, I don’t know, it made me like him more, honestly.
Andrew: Yeah, I…
Laura: Yeah, I agree with you completely.
Laura: I have nothing to add.
Andrew: That’s – well, yeah, I just want to say that it felt really good to not only just hear about Dumbledore’s early life but just to know that he was normal, like you said. I mean it was just – it was just really – I don’t want to say vindicating, but it was really…nice. [laughs]
Matt: Yeah, and for any point in the series, it’s probably – this was the best book to show this part of Dumbledore. For – for we always relied on Dumbledore being the – the sort of god-sent mentor of Harry.
Andrew: Right, exactly. A saint.
Matt: Yes, so now…
Andrew: And kids don’t think straight when they’re our age. Except for us, I mean, we produce the most popular Harry Potter podcast online. We must be geniuses.
Matt: Gee, gloat much?
Elysa: You know what? I just totally thought of something else, and this is going to be really, really dorky, but I remember in the Order of the Phoenix movie – do you guys remember when Sirius says something to Harry about there’s light and dark in all of us and it’s what you do with it, or something, that matters?
Elysa: It was – I don’t know, just made me think of that even though it’s totally not canon.
Matt: Yeah, not everyone’s light and dark, or good and evil.
Elysa: Well, it made me – I think, I mean in terms of stepping out of the character analysis for a second, I think it brings a greater appreciation for the series in general, because I think so much of a problem with a lot of novels is that they’ll show absolute evil versus absolute good, and so it’s easy to choose, you know, a side, and it’s easy to see what’s right and what’s wrong. But I think that in reality it’s so much more convoluted and complex than that, and that this whole thing with Dumbledore just – you know, again made it so much more realistic.
Laura: Yeah, I agree.
Andrew: Did you guys know Dumbledore was 116 years old?
Laura: Yeah, he was old.
Andrew: I didn’t realize he was that old.
Laura: He was older than god.
Andrew: That’s crazy.
Chapter 19, “The Silver Doe”
Andrew: Okay, well, let’s move on to Chapter 19 now, “The Silver Doe.” This is where Ron comes back, and it’s really…
Matt: [laughs] That was great, Andrew!
Laura: [laughs] Harry gets naked.
Matt: Ron comes back!
Andrew: This – this chapter, I don’t know what to think, because Ron comes back, and I still don’t fully understand it. I don’t fully understand his intentions on coming back, and even Hermione was a little – uh…
Matt: Well, she beat the crap out of him.
Andrew: Well, exactly, until she was satisfied with his answer. It starts off with Harry up late one night, I guess watching the campsite. And Harry spots a silver doe, and Harry is intrigued by it and follows it to the little pond that’s frozen over, and at the bottom is the sword of Gryffindor.
Harry Stripping Down for the Movie
Laura: I know – I know one thing that a lot people are really excited for is this scene in the movie because Harry strips down and dives into the icy water.
Andrew: Oh yeah, and I said…
Matt: Oh my gosh. Uh-oh. Equus.
Andrew: My joke during Prophecy was that Jo went to see Equus while she was writing Book 7 and she decided, she said, “Damn, Dan!” So she wrote in a little half-naked scene.
Laura: That reminds me of this funny thing that Dan was talking about one time in an interview, I guess, where it was during Equus and it was one night when he knew that Jo was there. And he was on the stage naked at the time, and someone threw a stuffed animal owl up on the stage, and he said the first thought that went through his head was, “Oh my god, it’s not her, she wouldn’t do that.”
[Andrew and Elysa laugh]
Harry Following the Silver Doe
Laura: I thought that was funny. Well, I mean, what about the fact that Harry follows the silver doe?
Andrew: Yeah, I don’t – I don’t think that was the brightest idea. What were you guys’ reaction when you were reading this for the first time? Because mine was like, “Okay.”
Laura: Mine was like, “What the hell are you doing?”
Andrew: Yeah, terrible idea.
Andrew: But I guess there’s just something intriguing about seeing a Patronus just standing there in the woods. You know?
Matt: Yeah, I mean it’s…
Andrew: And at that point they were so desperate for something new that…
Matt: Well, I have a question about the Patronus thing. I mean, how far can a Patronus go?
Elysa: I think Snape was there, wasn’t he?
Laura: Yeah, I thought he was.
Matt: Was he there?
Elysa: Yeah, ’cause I think there was some part where there were these two trees that were growing together, or something, and there was a very small crack between them and Harry said it was the perfect spot for someone to hide, and Ron had said that he thought someone was living behind it but he didn’t stop to look because he noticed that Harry wasn’t coming up.
Matt: Well, not only that, though, but also remember in the wedding when…
Matt: Kingsley sent the Patronus to warn them.
Elysa: Yeah, that’s true.
Laura: And the Order uses Patronuses to send messages all the time.
Matt: Yeah, like what Tonks did in Book 6.
Andrew: But maybe Snape wanted to be there. I mean didn’t he put the sword there?
Laura: Yeah, he did, I thought.
Andrew: Yeah, so that’s why he was probably there.
Matt: But why the hell did he put it in the bottom of the lake? Why couldn’t he just put it in front of the tent?
Andrew: ‘Cause it takes a true Gryffindor to retrieve it!
Laura: No, because he wanted Harry to…
Matt: He wanted him to strip down!
Andrew: Yes, because J.K. Rowling went to see Equus and liked Dan’s body! I’m telling you that’s my theory.
Laura: And we wonder why she won’t come on our show. [laughs]
Ron Showing his Gryffindor Traits
Andrew: Yeah, I’m sure that’s why. So Ron’s the one that actually retrieves the sword because Harry blacks out underwater, and then this is – we’ll just skip right to when the locket – Harry figures out that he has to open it up by saying “open” in Parseltongue. Then Ron has to fight the Horcrux because two bubbles come out – Harry and Ron – who are taunting Ron and, you know, Ron has to show his true Gryffindor abilities here to just ignore them and stab the locket with the sword. What did you guys think of this scene when Ron – he’s fighting these – he’s fighting some of these terrible things that, frankly, I think are true. That Harry and Hermione, in these bubble forms, are telling him that he was a coward, that he was stupid, that he was the least favourite of the family…
Matt: This is what Ron has been always thinking about. This is probably what the locket was doing, was taking all of his fears or his things that he keeps worrying about and just throwing it in his face.
Elysa: Like a Boggart.
Matt: Because he’s always thought of himself as the least of the family.
Laura: Yeah, I mean we even see that in the Mirror of Erised. In the first book when he sees himself holding the Quidditch Trophy and that he’s Head Boy. And all these things he sees that his brothers get that he never got.
Matt: Yeah, and he also sees that he’s not exactly – I mean he thinks that he’s not exactly the most – dang it – most competent person of the trio. He sees that Hermione’s the one that’s smart, Harry’s the Chosen One, but he doesn’t see where he fits in.
Andrew: At that point Ron does destroy the locket, and then there’s like this awkward moment where Harry had just seen everything, so it’s like, suddenly, Harry has seen all of Ron’s worst fears. Just that Harry and Hermione would get together, and Hermione was too good for Ron as long as Harry was around. I’m looking forward to seeing this in the movie because I hope there’s like some awkward tension between all of them.
Laura: Yeah. Well, it’s really awkward because Ron actually sees the fake Harry and Hermione kiss.
Andrew: Right, that too.
Laura: And that just drives him over…
Laura: [laughs] …the edge. He freaks out.
Matt: Well, is it really like – they’re not heads, they’re just two bubbles…
Matt: …that rise up from it. So…
The Horcrux’s Motivation
Andrew: Do you think in a way the Horcrux was asking him to kill it? Because all these things would just anger you and make you want to destroy it, wouldn’t they?
Matt: It’s trying to break him is what it’s trying to do.
Andrew: Yeah, but at the same time…
Matt: It’s using every single thing that he feels bad about or feels, you know – that he knows that disturbs him the most.
Andrew: Right. I agree that it gets to him. But at the same time don’t you think this could also have a negative effect for the Horcrux? Because it could annoy him – okay, we know what its intentions were, but it could possibly annoy him so much that he actually wants to destroy it more. Especially if Harry’s watching – he wants to stop it and the only way to do that is to destroy it.
Matt: I don’t think that it’s showing him things that annoy him, though. I think it’s showing things that upset him.
Andrew: Well, upset – annoy. I sort of meant it in the same way.
Matt: Well, everyone knows there’s certain kinds of things that you think about and you just break down.
Andrew: Yeah. I mean like, before Book 7 came out, we were like, okay, Harry is going to be the one to kill Voldemort because at this point Harry has so much riding on Voldemort’s death. And all of this trouble that Voldemort has put him through and killing his parents. Harry’s going to knock him out so easily it’s going to be insane. I sort of think this is the same thing, where so much is built up. Where it’s easier for Ron to just do it…
Andrew: …with anger.
Matt: Well, it’s – but if you think about it for another person, like for Harry, if he sees Ginny just being tortured or just calling out to Harry that, “Why did you leave me?” Or “You don’t love me” or something. Do you think that he would get angry and stab it, or do you think that he would just start to break down and start crying?
Elisa: I think Harry would stab it.
Andrew: I think he would stab it, too.
Laura: Yeah. I don’t know. I think the whole thing is that the Horcrux – and we’ve talked about this before – how it can kind of tell when it’s not safe. So I think in this state it knew it was threatened, and it was probably just resorting to the last thing it knew how to do.
Laura: Which was taunt him and try to break him down. And make him too weak and make him just leave instead of hurting it.
Matt: Well, the locket probably also felt that Ron was the weakest of the two. Because when it was opened Harry was also there, but it didn’t do anything to Harry. It just went straight to Ron. And I think it knows that Ron is the most emotional of the two. And the most susceptible to it. Because that’s probably why it chose him.
Andrew: I think that’s all pretty interesting. Okay, so what do you want to talk about next? Ron and Harry go back to the tent and Hermione has a little fit. What do you guys think about this fit? Was it deserved?
Laura: I thought I would have reacted the same way.
Andrew: If you were in love with Ron?
Laura: I would have been – yes, I would have been pissed. Wouldn’t you, Elysa?
Elysa: Absolutely. In fact, I was glad that, you know, she got really pissed off at him. Because Harry – I mean, I understand why Harry reacted the way he did. I mean, I think both of their reactions were appropriate. But at that point in time I was so upset with Ron myself I was living vicariously through Hermione. Like, “Yes! Go, Hermione! Get him.”
Matt: Well, for what he did he doesn’t deserve to go unpunished. Whether or not he had the right to do it or not.
Laura: Well, and also just the idea that he took off when it’s so dangerous right now. And them not knowing where he was. Because Harry kept hoping that he might pop up at Hogwarts on the Marauder’s Map and he never did. And so it was just this long period of not knowing whether Ron was dead or alive, or if he’d made it home, or if he was still wandering around the countryside. I would have been worried out of my mind, and then the second he showed back up I would have beat the crap out of him. Just like she did.
Matt: That’s the scene that I want to see in the film.
Matt: I want to see Emma Watson beat the crap out of Rupert Grint.
Andrew: But it’s more of the same. It’s more of Angry Emma Watson. The classic Angry-Panicked-Scared Emma Watson. I don’t know.
Matt: Yeah, but with…
Matt: …a drop-kick and, you know…
Laura: I think though, probably, they’ll use that to make like – I don’t know, I feel like with these movies they always try to take something to make the mood a little lighter.
Laura: And I feel like they’ll make this somewhat comical in the film, which is kind of upsetting to me because, really, when I read it, I identified with that – just the idea of being so afraid and then so angry about what he had done that it’s not even funny. But I just have a feeling that they’ll try and make some laughs out of it.
Andrew: But how could you not laugh seeing Hermione attack Ron?
Matt: Yeah, whether or not it’s intended to laugh or not the audience is going to laugh at that scene.
Andrew: Yeah, it’s funny.
Matt: I mean I laughed when I read it too.
Elysa: Well, even Hermione laughs at the end.
Laura: Yeah, but it wasn’t like – I don’t know. It was more like a sinister, somewhat…
Elysa: I agree.
Matt: I think it was more like a punishment, like to her husband or something.
Matt: Whether she slaps him really hard in the face or we just follow Dan to the tent and then all we hear is this muffling sound and then he turns around and, you know, Rupert Grint’s in a fetal position while Emma Watson is kicking him in the stomach. It’s…
Laura: I don’t think they’re going to go that far.
Matt: I know, but I mean it’s – with these kind of situations and this kind of a scene that’s usually going to bring the audience to laugh. Because…
Matt: …it kind of breaks the ice, but it’s definitely going to…
Laura: Yeah, but I think that they’re definitely going to take that scene and make it – just shoot it more comically.
Matt: Well, it’s going to be kind of like Prisoner of Azkaban.
Laura: Like, Ron will come into the tent and all you’ll see is Hermione’s fist come in and just smack him in the face.
Laura: And then they’ll play the light-hearted music and – I don’t know, I don’t like it.
Elysa: I agree. I feel like, yeah…
Andrew: I don’t like the future.
[Andrew, Elysa, and Laura laugh]
Laura: I don’t.
MuggleCast 134 Transcript (continued)
Another Nazi Parallel
Andrew: And then rounding out the chapter Ron explains to Hermione that he was taken away by Snatchers immediately. He was planning on coming back until he was taken up by Snatchers. We find out our – well, they kidnap Muggle-borns and blood traitors to claim a reward for the Ministry, then Ron only, of course, barely manages to escape by some stroke of luck and eventually he came back. So I don’t know. Is this another Nazi parallel?
Matt: I don’t know.
Laura: Oh, I think it’s…
Matt: I think so.
Laura: …easily a Nazi parallel. I mean it’s not one hundred percent the same but there’s still that general idea of people having to go into hiding because of their heritage.
Matt: Well, they’re bounty hunters.
Matt: That’s pretty much what they are.
Laura: Like Dog?
[sings] I am the dog.
[sings] The big bad dog.
Laura: Oh my gosh. That’s the best episode ever.
Matt: Ever. Ever.
Laura: He’s like, “This is Beth. She’s my bitch.”
Matt: “Beth is my bitch. I got a whole team.”
Andrew: What is that? What episode? What is that?
Laura: It’s South Park.
Matt: Oh, it’s so good. “You got a hall pass, bra?”
[Laura and Matt laugh]
Matt: “You need to go over to Christ, bra.”
Matt: “Christ is Lord.”
[Matt and Laura laugh]
Matt: Andrew, you have to watch that show.
Andrew: Okay, link me. So that’s about it for this chapter. Nothing else really happens, we just did want to mention the Snatchers, and it turns out Ron gives Harry a spare wand that he stole from the Snatchers. But I don’t know. Elysa, do you think it was very comforting to Harry, having that wand? I mean it wasn’t the one that – it wasn’t a wand that would do him as much good as the one he had, right?
Elysa: I thought it was a little convenient that, you know, take Ron out of the plot momentarily and he shows up next with a brand new wand. But Harry was grateful for it.
Andrew: Conveniently good timing.
Matt: Yeah, do you guys think it was a little too convenient? Almost like…
Andrew: Yeah, I wish there were sort of a cooler plot to like…
Matt: Like almost impossible.
Andrew: But then you got to remember the book’s pretty long as it is. Just adding another thing for him to get a new wand – it would’ve been too much.
Matt: Yeah. Because, I mean…
Elysa: That’s true.
Matt: There is no way that Ron knew that Harry broke his wand.
Andrew: He didn’t know!
Matt: So, it just says – No, he didn’t!
Andrew: He did not know, I know. I’m confirming.
Matt: Oh, yeah. Sorry. Yeah. So, he just saw the wand just laying there, going, “Oh! Spare wand.”
Matt: I mean, it’s like a quarter being on a floor, you just pick it up and pocket it for a rainy day or something?
Andrew: Exactly. As long as it’s a head’s side up.
Elysa: I think…
Matt: Oh, a piece of candy!
Elysa: The other point…
Matt: Oh, a piece of candy!
Elysa: The other point he mentioned about Ron, maybe, is just that he does say that he wanted to come back immediately, like the second after he disapparated. And I think that’s important because when I read that my anger sort of disappeared a little bit because I did remember that mostly – I mean, his reaction was mostly based off of the fact that the Horcrux affected him much worse than anyone else. So, it was…
Elysa: It was definitely his emotions and his feelings but they were just magnified to, you know, the nth degree by the Horcrux. You have to keep that in mind. I mean, he did say he tried to come back immediately, but Hermione was just so good with those protective enchantments.
Andrew: It’s time for Quote Quiz.
Matt: Quote Quiz!
Matt: Oh, sorry!
Andrew: Oh, Matt, don’t jump ahead of yourself now. Today, as I do everyday, I sat down and worked on the show and its future. Today I made some new audio segments to kick off some of our more popular segments here on the show. From now on when we get to Quote Quiz I’m going to say, “So it’s time for…”
[Audio for Quote Quiz segment plays]
Andrew: Yes, yes, yes, yes! What do you guys think? Cool, huh?
Laura: That’s very exciting. I like it a lot.
Matt: Did you steal that off the “Bill Nye the Science Guy” TV show?
Andrew: [laughs] No!
Matt: Sounds like one of those cheesy 80s after-school specials for kids or
something. Ten ways to eat your vegetable.
[Audio for Quote Quiz segment playing in the background]
Andrew: [sings] “Bill Nye the Science guy! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill!”
Matt: Oh my God, and you watched it too, didn’t you?
Andrew: “Bill Nye”? You bet I did.
Laura: Hey! I watched “Bill Nye.” It was awesome.
Andrew: He’s a great guy. We should have him on the show sometime.
Andrew: Quote Quiz this week: “Lovegood is on your side, Harry. The ‘Quibbler’ has been for you all along. It keeps telling everyone that
they’ve got to help you.” That’s Quote Quiz this week.
Matt: That was Hermione, wasn’t it?
Andrew: Yes, it is. [pause] Not!
Matt: Well, it can’t be the Lovegoods – Mr. Lovegood.
Andrew: No. Could be another person but I’m not going to spoil it because people are playing at home.
Make the Music Connection
Andrew: Anyway, now it is time for…
[Audio for Make the Music Connection segment]
Laura: Very nice.
Andrew: Like it?
Laura: I like that one a lot, yeah.
Andrew: Let’s hear it again.
[Audio for the Make the Music Connection segment plays]
Andrew: Make the Music Connection. We’re going to start with Elysa this week.
Andrew: You’re ready, girlfriend?
Elysa: I’m ready.
Andrew: This may make you a little sad because you had to bail out, but, I don’t know, we’ll see.
[The song “Wannabe” by the Spice Girls plays]
Andrew: “Wannabe” by the Spice Girls!
Elysa: Oh God!
Matt: Oh my God! I got…
Elysa: What, Matt? What?
Matt: No, no, no! It’s you.
Laura: Yeah, it’s all yours, Elysa.
Matt: It’s all yours.
Elysa: It’s me? Okay. “Wannabe”?
[Song is still playing in the background]
Elysa: I don’t know, Laura! I’m trying to listen to the words. Oh! [laughs] Okay, in Goblet of Fire, the Beauxbatons girls – they enter. This is their theme music.
Elysa: I stole that from Matt, just so you guys know.
Andrew: All right.
Andrew: I’ll take that, I guess. [laughs] That’s good.
Elysa: I was actually going to go with – I was actually going to go with like when Hermione and Ron finally kiss, to be honest with you.
Andrew: You know, I was thinking that too. If you want to be – when you laughed when – after they said, “If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends.”
Elysa: Yeah! Okay.
Andrew: Okay. [laughs] Matt.
[“You’ve Got a Friend in Me” by Randy Newman starts playing]
Andrew: Randy Newman! “You’ve Got a Friend in Me!” Make a connection.
Matt: I think…
Laura: We’re really good at these today.
Elysa: This is Lucius singing to Voldemort.
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Matt: Oh crap! I had – I was like screaming at you guys, like why aren’t you listening to me?
[Elysa and Laura laugh]
Matt: I had the – it was on mute.
Laura: We were just sitting here like, okay, what’s he doing?
Andrew: Did he give up?
Matt: Oh my gosh, sorry. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! I have it! It’s when Hermione and Harry were fighting Nagini in the house.
Matt: Well, I had another one, but it was dirty.
Elysa: I like that.
[“Lollipop” by Mika starts playing]
Andrew: “Lollipop” by Mika.
Laura: What’s he saying?
Matt: “Sucking too hard on your lollipop, love’s gonna get you down.”
Elysa: This is totally Dumbledore and Grindelwald.
Laura: Yeah! That was what I was going to say.
Laura: Dumbledore and Grindelwald.
Matt: Mmhm. I kind of thought of the dancing veelas at the Goblet of Fire…
Andrew: Yeah, sort of.
Matt: …at the Quidditch World Tour, or match thing.
Andrew: [laughs] Okay. All right, well that was Make the Connection this week – Make the Music Connection. Did you have one for me, Matt? Or…
Elysa: I have one!
Matt: Yeah, wait. Just give me a second. Let me look at something, because I have almost all your songs on here. Ready?
[“Tale as Old as Time” from Beauty and the Beast starts playing]
Andrew: Oh, well, that’s an easy one. Um…this isn’t in the book – I mean, this is in between the final chapter and the epilogue. Ron and Hermione – their first dance as a couple at their wedding.
Matt: Beauty and the Beast?
Andrew: Beauty and the Beast yeah.
Matt: I would hardly call Ron a beast.
Laura: That’s mean.
Matt: I would probably – I would go more towards Krum and Hermione dancing or something.
Andrew: Or how about Remus and Tonks’s wedding?
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Andrew: Because he transforms.
Elysa: That’s terrible.
Laura: That’s so mean.
Andrew: No, come one.
Matt: That probably fits.
Andrew: Yeah, thank you. Or, my god, just the story as a whole. A hundred years from now, [sings] “Tale as old as time…” and I’ll tell you why Matt picked this song…
Matt: I think it connects more to Twilight.
Matt: It connects more to Twilight series than Harry Potter.
Andrew: Yeah, well, Edward’s the beauty and Bella’s the beast. Is that what you were…
Matt: [laughs] Bella’s a beast, yeah.
Laura: She is a beast, I hate her.
Andrew: I’ve been so into this song lately, “Beauty and the Beast,” the title song. Love it.
Matt: He’s been playing it a lot.
Andrew: It’s beautiful. It’s beautiful. Crying just thinking about it. Okay.
Hold Up, Hosts
Andrew: All right, so someone sent in this e-mail this week, and I sort of thought we could start doing this sort of as a new segment, because it’s a challenge to us from the listeners, and I did make an intro for it. Goes like this.
[Audio plays for “Hold Up, Hosts” Segment]
Andrew: So, [laughs] what we’re going to do…
Matt: Oh my god.
[Elysa and Laura laugh]
Andrew: What do you mean?
[Audio plays for “Hold Up, Hosts” Segment]
Andrew: I don’t know – just – I don’t know.
Elysa: Aww, that’s cute.
Andrew: It doesn’t have to be the best thing.
Matt: It’s cute. It’s all right.
[Audio plays for “Chicken Soup for the MuggleCast Soul” Segment]
Andrew: Oh shoot! Oh no! I just spoiled the next one.
Andrew: Damn playlist. So, in this segment, a listener will e-mail us a challenge and we’ll do it on the air. Now, we don’t want it to be like, quizzing us on Harry Potter and stuff, because last thing we would want to do is copy another podcast; however, if you have a challenge for us, like this one, Jason, 16 from Michigan presented to us, you know, we’d be happy to give it a try. Jason writes:
So, you think you can dance?
He tries to be sarcastic in this e-mail, but I don’t exactly get it. He says:
So, you think you can dance? Well, that’s too bad, because dancing won’t help you in this challenge. Your challenge is: Repeat the phrase, ‘Potter…'”
Oh no, I already screwed it up.
“Repeat the phrase, ‘Poor potter popped his pinky on the porcupine,’ five, yes, five times within ten seconds. Do it on the air if you can – yeah, that’s right, yeah, be scared, it’s fine, I don’t blame you, it takes a real man to do it, don’t be ashamed, you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to.”
Oh, we will, Jason, we will.
Matt: It takes a real man, yet he watches “So You Think You Can Dance?” on TV?
Andrew: Good point, good point.
Matt: Ouch – ow, that one burned.
Elysa: Yeah, who’s going to try this first?
Andrew: I’ll try it first if nobody else wants to.
Matt: All right, I’ll go second, I guess.
Andrew: Now I got a little timer on my recording thingy so, when I say – or does someone else want to time me? Someone else time me.
Laura: Yeah, I’ll time you.
Andrew: And just say stop when ten seconds are up.
Laura: Okay, ready? I’ll tell you when.
Andrew: Poor potter popped his pinky on the porcupine. Poor potter popped his pinky on the porcupine. Poor potter popped his pinky on the porcupine. Poor potter popped his pinky on the porcupine. Poor potter popped his pinky on the porcupine.
Laura: You did it at seventeen seconds, actually.
Andrew: Oooh! Seventeen seconds or seven?
Andrew: That was seventeen seconds?
Laura: No, you did it in seven seconds, never-mind. I’m sorry, I’m sorry.
Andrew: Okay. [laughs]
Laura: I can’t count! Leave me alone!
Andrew: Take that, Jason!
Laura: Leave me alone!
Andrew: Okay, that was actually pretty easy. Does someone else want to try it?
Matt: Yeah, I don’t want to do it now because I’m going to mess it up.
Laura: I know.
Elysa: I know, you just showed us all up, Andrew.
Laura: I guess I’ll try it.
Andrew: Come on, I’m bad with words all the time. If I can do it, anyone can.
Matt: All right.
Andrew: Laura, you want to?
Andrew: All right. Ready, set, go.
Laura: Poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine.
Andrew: Boom! Nine seconds.
Andrew: Good job. Laura…
Laura: That would have been more of a challenge…
Matt: Oh! Oh, it’s popped!
Laura: …if you… [laughs] Well, what did you think it said?
Laura: [laughs] That’s what I thought when we first saw it too, and I didn’t say anything.
Andrew: Ready. Set. Go.
Matt: Poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine [laughs]. Poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine.
Matt: Poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine. Was that five?
Andrew: It was like eight times. [laughs]
Laura: You did it like eight times.
Andrew: That was good, though, you got it eight times in like, eleven seconds or something. So, that was good. [laughs]
Elysa: All right, now I have to do this…
Andrew: Yes, you do.
Elysa: …because I’m the only one who hasn’t. Okay.
Andrew: Ready. Set. Go.
Elysa: Poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine, poor Potter popped his pinky on the porcupine.
Andrew: Good. Nine seconds.
Andrew: All right, Jason. That wasn’t hard at all, Jason!
Matt: Yeah. We can dance!
Andrew: Give us a harder one, Jason! Um, all right, so if you have a challenge like that, send it all in to mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com. Put “Hold up, Hosts” – “Hold up, Hosts Challenge” in the subject line.
Chicken Soup for the MuggleCast Soul
Andrew: All right, and we’re going to wrap things up today with one of the longer running segments here on our show.
[Audio for Chicken Soup for the MuggleCast Soul segment plays]
Laura: It’s so happy.
Matt: I feel like it’s selling Philadelphia cream cheese.
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Andrew: Yeah. Laura, you want to take this e-mail?
Laura: Sure. It’s the Kelsey one, right?
Laura: M’kay. This comes from… [laughs]. This comes from Kelsey, 15 of California. She writes:
“Hey guys, I don’t really have one of those sob stories that we typically hear on Chicken Soup for the MuggleCast Soul. But rather, an I-almost-died-of-boredom story. These last two weeks have been hell for me, literally. I was in a show that just ended this past weekend. And everyday for the past two weeks, I had to stay at school until nine o’clock or later for rehearsal. The levels of boredom were extremely high, being that I was only in two songs at the beginning and one at the end. So to past time, I downloaded a few episodes to listen to every night to keep me occupied. It definitely helped. I even met a few new friends because of you guys. One girl came up to me and asked what I was listening to. When I responded, ‘MuggleCast,’ she screamed, ‘Oh my gosh! I love MuggleCast!’ We then proceeded to spend the rest of the night playing ‘Harry Potter’ hangman on the big white board. So I just want to say thanks for keeping me sane. And keep up the good work. Love Kelsey from California.”
Andrew: Aw, there you go.
Andrew: Uniting Harry Potter MuggleCast listeners together. That’s always cool when people write in.
Laura: Yeah, it – it’s bizarre when you think about it…
Andrew: The chances are slim but…
Andrew: They’re really slim but we believe you. We believe you.
Laura: Well, I mean, I came to school and my neighbor was a listener.
Andrew: That’s true.
Laura: That threw me for a loop.
Andrew: Yeah. No, I think you’re lying about that. Even though I met her, I still think you’re lying.
Laura: No, no, no. I’m really not [laughs]. Like…
Andrew: I know, I’m just kidding.
Andrew: Well, this probably does wrap up our fine podcast program for this March – let’s just pretend this comes out on the first, this March first. Before we let you guys go we want to remind everyone about our contact information. Laura, if someone wants to mail something in to the P.O. Box, how do they do that?
Laura: You can always send [unintelligible] to:
P.O. Box 3151
Andrew: We also have a wonderful voicemail line, which we will probably get back to next week. If you want to call in a question, comment, or even a rebuttal, you can dial 1-218-20-MAGIC in the United States. If you’re in the United Kingdom you can dial 02081440677 and if you’re in Australia you can dial 0280035668. You can also Skype the username MuggleCast to leave your voicemail if you want to do it that way.
[Show music begins playing]
Andrew: We also have a handy feedback form on MuggleCast.com where you can contact anyone of the hosts on our program. Except for Elysa, you’re not on there yet, but a few more shows [whispers] and we’ll put you on there. [normal voice] I’ll talk to the higher ups.
Matt: [whispering] We’ll get you a gift basket.
Andrew: You can also contact anyone of us by our first name at staff dot mugglenet dot com. Matt, I’m now happy to report, is matt at staff dot mugglenet dot come.
Andrew: Which has actually been open for a while. We just didn’t know it until Matt complained for the 50 millionth time earlier this week.
Matt: Well, come on, I’m not Mikey.
Andrew: You’re Matthew B.
Matt: I want Mikey to be original. Instead of Matty B it’ll just be Matt.
Andrew: I understand.
Matt: Because that’s what I am. I’m Matt.
Andrew: Okay, Mikey.
[Andrew and Laura laugh]
Andrew: So, you can contact him at matt at staff dot mugglenet dot com. And Elysa can be contacted at elysa at fanfiction dot mugglenet dot com. You can also visit MuggleCast.com for our community outlets, including: The
Andrew: I’m baffled. We were the highest rated podcast on their Yahoo! Podcast directory and they shut down. I don’t get it. I guess their section wasn’t too popular.
Matt: I guess not.
Andrew: Thank you, everyone, for listening this week. Apologies to J.K. Rowling but we are out of time. I’m Andrew Sims.
Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.
Matt: I’m Matthew Britton.
Elysa: And I’m Elysa Montfort.
Andrew: Thank you, everyone, for listening and we’ll see you next week for Episode 135. Buh-bye.