Transcript #66

MuggleCast 66 Transcript


Show Intro


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[Intro music plays]

Andrew: Because if I weren’t listening to MuggleCast, I’d actually be
getting paid to do my job. Thank you, Melissa Reid, 26, of Moore, Oklahoma.
This is MuggleCast Episode 66, for December 3rd, 2006.

[Music continues to play]

Andrew: Guys, girls, and Micah, I am absolutely infuriated…

Kevin: Are you?

Andrew: …this week.

Laura: And why is that?

Andrew: Yes.

Micah: Why?

Andrew: I can’t even talk about it.

Kevin: You’re so angry?

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: WB is cheap. That is my – that is what I’m saying. I think WB is cheap. Anyone else agree?

Eric: Well, we already knew that, Andrew.

Kevin: I agree, definitely.

Eric: We already…

Andrew: Laura, you agree?

Eric: I don’t know.

Laura: I would say regarding some evidence that we’ve been sent, that, yeah.

Kevin: I think they’re trying to pull a fast one.

Eric: I don’t think WB’s cheap, it’s just that WB is a corporation, and
that’s what some of you have been saying. They do as corporations do; they
recycle footage. Say, if it were movie – Goblet of Fire movie footage
in an Order of the Phoenix trailer, they can do that. They do that.

Andrew: Way to spoil it for everyone, Eric.

Eric: Oh.

Andrew: Everyone was going to have to wait until after the news.

Eric: Darn.

Andrew: Teaser is no longer a teaser.

Eric. Oh no. Okay.

Andrew: I’m infuriated, I can’t go on. I quit my wizard rock band, I quit
the pickles catch phrase. I’m done.

[Eric laughs]

Eric: The pickles catch phrase, not the pickles catch phrase, Andrew.

Andrew: All right, I like doing that, I admit that. Pickle, pickle, pickle,
pickle…

Eric: Okay.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: …pickle, pickle, pickle.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: That made it into the Caption Contest this week, Andrew.

Andrew: I am Andrew Sims. Oh, I’m very glad.

Kevin: I am Kevin Steck.

Eric: I am Eric Scull.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

[Music continues to play]


News


Micah: Throughout this weekend’s presentation of Harry Potter Weekend on ABC
Family, new previews of Order of the Phoenix have been airing.
Fourteen high-quality clips can be seen on MuggleNet.com, as well
as descriptions of each video. The clips feature interviews with the cast as
well as some amazing new shots from the film. Don’t forget to check out the
world premiere of the extended version of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of
Azkaban
tonight at 8 p.m. on ABC Family.

Jason Isaacs and his character Lucius Malfoy have made The San Francisco
Chronicle
‘s list of the Sexiest Men Never Alive. This is Lucius’ second
honor recently as he was also on the Forbes list of richest fictional
characters.

And for the first time in five years, JK Rowling has won a literary prize in
her own country. In a poll of 3,000 schoolchildren, aged 8 to 12, Half-Blood
Prince
was voted the best Scottish children’s book. Jo was unable to attend
the awards ceremony, but did pass along a message, containing news of
progress on the seventh Harry Potter book.

Warner Bros. has tentatively announced that starting in 2007, fans will be
able to not only legally download movies but also burn them to DVD from the
Internet the same day they become available in stores. This will include the
Harry Potter films as well, so fans can look forward to watching Order of
the Phoenix
on their computers.

Information about the Australian version of the Order of the Phoenix trailer
has been released by the government’s Office of Film and Literature
Classification. They list the trailer as being two minutes long – which is
longer than the American version – and the international trailer should be
released within the next month.

Finally, Forbes released an article this week about the controversial
burning of the Harry Potter books. The series has often been the target of
many Christian fundamentalists who claim that “Rowling has a world
platform.” Over the past five years, half a dozen book burnings have been
planned, their organizers claiming that the books, as well as Potter fan
sites, promote witchcraft. Ray Bradbury, author of Fahrenheit 451, defended
the books, saying, “There’s nothing wrong with the Potter books, because
they’re not promoting witchcraft. They’re promoting being wise.” That’s
right, you tell them, Ray!

That’s all the news for this December 3rd, 2006 edition of MuggleCast. Back
to the show.

Andrew: All right, well, thank you Micah.

Micah: [pauses then laughs] I was trying to think of something creative to say
and it just didn’t happen.

Andrew: Leave the creativity up to me, please. Thank you.

Eric: What’s this conspiracy now?


Goblet of Fire in Order of the Phoenix Trailer


Andrew: Ummm, well, Micah, would you like to explain to everyone what we’re all
upset about?

Micah: Sure.

Eric: Yeah, Micah, what’s bugging you?

Micah: Well, actually thanks to Valerie, 16, of Colorado because she did a
really good thing. She sent us in an e-mail, here, after I mentioned on last
week’s show that when I paused the trailer, I think it was around 28
seconds, there’s this weird woman’s face in the bottom right-hand corner,
but that wasn’t really the only thing. We found out that that was Bellatrix.
However…

Andrew: Great, wonderful.

Micah: However, the clip is from Goblet of Fire and it’s in the
Order of the Phoenix trailer.

Andrew: What?

Micah: What’s up with that?

Andrew: What?

Eric: What?

Andrew: No wonder it made me want to go see Goblet of Fire
again.

[Eric and Micah laugh]

Eric: Wait a minute now, now… [Laughs]

Laura: You’re on notice, WB, I’m telling you.

Eric: Let’s clarify. Bellatrix, the whole Bellatrix face thing and all that,
that is not in Goblet of Fire, but the scene that it’s overlaying,
the scene that that whole woman’s face is overlaying is actually part of
the graveyard scene in Goblet of Fire, showing Voldemort apparently
casting a spell. But you can clearly make out in the right-hand side the
statue – the gravestone of the graveyard of Goblet of Fire.

Andrew: Well, not just that, you see Voldemort and he’s in the exact same
position…

Eric: Oh yeah.

Andrew: Same exact face, same exact background, everything’s the same.

Eric: Same exact clothing, I mean, who doesn’t change their clothes? Yuck

Andrew: It is extremely amusing that that – they took a clip from Goblet
of Fire
to insert into the Order of the Phoenix teaser trailer,
but this just answers the fact that none of the special effects are done
yet.

Eric: Well…

Andrew: So, they have to take from what is done. And what’s done? Goblet
of Fire
. That’s it. [laughs]

Eric: I don’t think that Goblet of Fire is done, I think they’re going
to come out with an extended edition.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: I heard WB was in talks with George Lucas. Now, Kevin Steck, now that
we’ve uncovered the dilemma, Andrew has one theory, what do you think is
going on with this whole footage reuses…

Micah: Fiasco.

Eric: The fiasco, this recycling fiasco.

Kevin: They needed filler.

Eric: They needed filler? I agree with that

Kevin: Totally needed filler.

Eric: I don’t necessarily, I don’t necessarily believe that not – like, no
effects are done, but I think simply that Warner Brothers was not ready to
show us the new Voldemort. So, in order to…

Micah: They needed 50…

Laura: Well…

Micah: Sorry, they needed filler for the 50 seconds.

Laura: …they’ve released like posters already…

Micah: I mean, come on.

[Everyone laughs]

Micah: That’s ridiculous.

Andrew: Just cut the trailer down to 45 seconds, then you won’t have to add
anything.

Eric: It actually is 47, some of them were 47 and incorrectly labeled as 57.

Kevin: And it is labeled a teaser.

Laura: It’s not exactly a teaser.

Andrew: It’s weird. I got a weird desire to watch the Goblet of Fire
film right after that.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: Now you know why.

Andrew: Now I know why.

Eric: Because it’s…

Kevin: Subliminal.

Andrew: I saw that, yeah.

Eric: So…

Andrew: There was also – I also had a weird desire to drink Coke right after
I saw that. Anyone else feel that too?

Eric: That’s because of that voice. If you turn your speakers up loud enough, you can actually make out, it says, “Drink more Pepsi.”

Andrew: Oh. [laughs]

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: That would not explain why I wanted to drink Coke.

Laura: Yeah,

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Eric: No, no, no. But the Coke one is on a higher frequency, Kevin can explain it.

Kevin: No, you have to play it in reverse.

Eric: Oh…

Andrew: Well, we’re getting too nerdy here.

Eric: Pepsi backwards is Coke.

Andrew: Let’s get back on track. This is pretty amusing, and what’s even more amusing is that nobody picked up on this until a couple of the MuggleCast listeners did. So…

Eric: Yeah, so…

Andrew: Good work!

Eric: …this new Order of the Phoenix teaser actually has some Goblet footage forwarded.

Andrew: Now, with that said, Harry does revisit the graveyard in his dreams in the opening chapter of Order of the Phoenix, but this still does not really explain why they would reuse a clip from Goblet of Fire.

Eric: I don’t think it’s necessarily a travesty. I mean, we all knew that the opening part of the…

Micah: It’s cheap.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: …trailer. Well, it’s kind of cheap.

Andrew: I wouldn’t say it’s cheap [Laughs] I mean.

Eric: Well, the opening part of the trailer is from Chamber of Secrets, you know, when the…

Andrew: No, no, wait a minute, hold up for a second…

Eric: When the Warner Brothers thing came up, that is so from Chamber of Secrets.

Andrew: There is no proof that that is a direct copy.

Eric: It is a direct copy.

Andrew: It’s not like they open up their video editor and they took the little clip they opened up the Chamber of Secrets file from the WB archives…

Eric: They did.

Andrew: …copied and pasted. I don’t believe that.

Laura: And the Chamber of Secrets one, it wasn’t even nighttime when it started, it was evening. So…

[Andrew laughs]

Eric: It’s not nighttime in this trailer.

Laura: Yeah, it is.

Eric: What low quality version are you watching?

Laura: No, okay, whenever…

Eric: It’s a – the sky is pink and blue.

Laura: No, it’s not.

Eric: The sky is Easter-colored, just like in Chamber of Secrets.

Laura: …Whenever they go through the clouds, it’s nighttime.

Eric: It’s not nighttime.

Andrew: It is pink above – anyway, we don’t need to debate. That’s just silly.

Eric: Okay.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: Well, they ripped off Chamber of Secrets – no, well, put it this way. What was it? One of the trailers used the scene where Harry finds out that, “You’re a wizard, Harry,” when it shows him in Ollivander’s. I thought another trailer like Chamber of Secrets or something did that.

Laura: Yeah, but that was a little different because it was the second year and they were kind of doing a recap.

Eric: A recap. Well, what’s to say they can’t do…

Laura: This is not a recap. This is… It almost…

Kevin: Filler.

Eric: This is making you think you see something new when you don’t?

Laura: Yeah.

Kevin: Exactly.

Andrew: It would make sense like if it said…

Kevin: If it had some dialogue.

Andrew: If Sirius was like – yeah.

Eric: “Fourteen years ago, Voldemort…”

Andrew: “Last year…”

Laura: Yeah, exactly…

Andrew: “Voldemort cast a spell on Harry,” and the other thing is that it’s only fifteen frames. I mean, so, you know, we’re not going to sit here and criticize WB. I was kidding when I said that – we were kidding when we say WB is cheap.

Eric: Yeah, absolutely kidding.

Andrew: What was I going to say?

Micah: Notice how I didn’t say anything.

Laura: Yeah.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]


Dobby in Goblet of Fire


Andrew: This reminds me of, I guess it was about a year ago, when someone found out, and I think they actually e-mailed this to MuggleNet, that Dobby was in Goblet of Fire for, like, half a second. When they were…

Kevin: Oh, I remember that…

Andrew: …he and another house-elf, yeah, were riding on the backs of camels. And….

Eric: [laughs] What?! [laughs again]

Andrew: They were all excited. Yeah, you didn’t see it?

Eric: Camels.

Micah: Yeah

Kevin: Yeah, it was…

Andrew: It was during the Tri-Wizard Tournament.

Kevin: …a really big deal. Like, everyone got…

Andrew: Yeah, like everyone was all excited. It was like, “Oh my God, Dobby is back!”

Eric: What, are you serious?

Micah: And you spent so much time. I remember that. You spent so much time putting that clip together and then somehow, it got taken down.

Andrew: Yeah, the post got deleted. Yeah, because that was when our news was just funky. But, yeah, so it got – someone caught it, but this was like, a few months after the film was released, so, in a way, this doesn’t surprise me [laughs] that nobody caught this because not everybody is going frame by frame and analyzing all of this.

Eric: Wait, so he was actually in the movie?

Andrew: Yeah, Dobby, he’s in there for, like, two seconds…

Eric: Oh my gosh.

Andrew: It goes by. The camera is going one way and the camels are going the other way

Eric: That’s like, in Star Wars, the aliens from E.T. are in the Senate. It’s kind of funny.

Kevin: Yeah, they do that as, like, “Easter Eggs.”

Eric: “Easter Eggs,” yeah. Different things like that. I don’t know

Andrew: That’s the big revelation of the week.

Eric: But didn’t that guy say that it cost, like, $150,000 every time Dobby sets foot on stage?

Kevin: Yeah, but…

Andrew: We talked about that on last week’s show.

Kevin: Yeah, he meant close-ups thought.

Eric: That camel back thing was just…

Kevin: This was so brief that it probably cost them no time at all.

Eric: At least a hundred grand?

Kevin: And it wasn’t in the fore- you know…

Eric: At least five grand, whatever

Kevin: …It was in the background, so.


Announcements


Andrew: You know what’s not going to cost $10,000 every second?

Micah: But make you feel like a hundred thousand bucks.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Oh, Micah. Oh, that was perfect.

Eric: That was great.

Andrew: Your very own MuggleCast t-shirt. On sale now, only for a limited time.

Eric: And we actually mean that. It’s not like the Disney Vault.

Andrew: As we’ve said multiple times now, MuggleCast T-Shirts are going out of sale starting December 31st, so pick up yours today. Many are being purchased. I bought four of my own, as I mentioned, because I am stocking up. I hope everyone else is stocking up. It’s like squirrels in the wintertime; right before winter, what do they do?

Laura: Except winter is not going to end in this case.

Eric: They freeze to death? [laughs]

Andrew: Well, they freeze to death, but they stock up on nuts. Squirrels stock up on nuts so – when they go in to hibernate. This is, like, you’re hibernating.

Kevin: Oh, okay. So you want people to wear multiple layers of MuggleNet t-shirts – MuggleCast t-shirts so they are warm for the winter, right?

Andrew: Yes, they are being purchased by squirrels. There was one addressed to “My house, but the tree in the backyard.”

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: So I didn’t understand that, but I guess it was a squirrel.

Kevin: That’s cute, Andrew.

Andrew: Yeah, but, [laughs] moving along. Don’t forget it’s a new month, so vote for us on Podcast Alley for the month of December. We need your vote to help kick out Keith and the Girl from the number one spot

[Eric laughs].

Andrew: I like messing with them so that their fans come after us, although their fans haven’t yet, but now that I’ve challenged them…

Eric: Oh, it’s on, baby, its on.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: They can’t beat us.

Eric: I feel bad for the girl.

[Kevin laughs]

Eric: She doesn’t even get named on the podcast and now her fans are being stolen.

Andrew: I just like the sell of it all. Keith and the Girl. Who’s the girl? I don’t know.

Now here’s an announcement that we’re going to have to wing this week because Ben and Jamie are not here. Little update on them, Jamie – it’s past his bedtime. We’re recording past his bedtime. Despite the fact he’s on AIM.

[Andrew, Eric and Laura laugh]

Andrew: And Ben is at a – some knowledge bowl? Or something intelligent…

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: …that I would never be invited to, but they would like us to remind you that MuggleNet’s What Will Happen in Harry Potter 7: Who Lives, Who Dies, and Who Falls in Love and How the Adventure Finally Ends is now on your local bookstore shelf pr bookshelf.

Kevin: Or you can message me and I can give you the PDF version.

Andrew: Oooh.

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: I’m messaging you right now.

[Andrew and Kevin laughs]

Eric: Kevin, what’s…

Andrew: You’re going to distribute that…

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: …on all the websites, aren’t you? I figured you would.

Eric: “Author: Kevin Steck.” [laughs]

Kevin: Yeah, cut their profits in two.

Andrew: The book is written by Emerson, Ben, Jamie, Andy G, and Gretchen, who works on the Encyclopedia.

Kevin: But we don’t talk about Gretchen.

Andrew: Yeah, and I have actually a confession to make. I am actually not Andy G. I know I’ve been saying that’s my penname for a while, but the reason I’m revealing it this week is because…

Eric: Andy G. threatened to sue you.

Andrew: Well, that. That’s true.

[Kevin laughs]

Andrew: And Ben and Jamie aren’t here this week so I can actually announce something that I don’t want them finding out about. I am actually working on a sequel to this book.

[Eric laughs]

Eric: What Might Happen Later than Harry Potter 7?

Andrew: Well, I’m glad you asked for the title. It’s actually going to be called MuggleNet.com’s What Will Happen in Harry Potter 7[laughs] Hold on a second.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: It’s actually called…

Eric: “Who comes back to life…”

Andrew: No. [laughs]

[Laura laughs]

Eric: “Who might not have died to begin with…”

Andrew: No.

Eric: “…and which relationships last?”

Andrew: It’s actually called MuggleNet.com’s [laughs] What

Eric: That was good.

Andrew:Will Happen In Harry Potter 7: Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Falls in Love and How Harry Will Finally Discover the Internet and I have struck up a few theories and I think it’s going to be a big-selling book.

Eric: Or you could just contribute to MuggleNet’s editorials, you know? I’m sure they’d love to have you.

Andrew: No, I want to be a published author.

Eric: Oh, okay.

Andrew: And I don’t want to pretend like Andy G is my penname.

Eric: That’s what it’s all about.

Andrew: So, it’s a sequel and I ask that nobody tells Jamie and Ben about this via e-mail, so please keep this a secret from them and it’ll be in bookshelves, I guess, a few months from now.

Micah: That’s fine, because neither of them actually listen to the show, so you’re safe.

Andrew: If anyone wants to help me write it, just let me know. A co-host.

Micah: Sure.

Eric: Yeah, I’ll write something.

Andrew: Anyone?

Eric: Sure.

Andrew: Okay. All right. All right, cool.

Eric: It’ll be the other half of MuggleCast that didn’t get on the first time.

Andrew: All right, I will talk to you about that later. And we’d also like to remind everyone, MuggleCast Episode 70 – 70 is going to be our variety show that is made up of your segments and your filks, whatever you want. Just send them in to mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com. We’re looking, of course, for stuff like MuggleCast remixes, stuff like that. We’ve been getting a few submissions and they’re all pretty entertaining, and we want to share them with the rest of you. And that is also going to be our New Year’s show, when we won’t be around to record our regular show.


Andrew’s Wizard Rock Band


Andrew: Now, the real reason everyone is looking forward to MuggleCast 70, because – is because that is when I will premiere my first Wizard Rock single.

Eric: I’m so excited.

Andrew: It’s nameless for now. I’m still working on a name.

Eric: Awww.

Andrew: Actually, I have a little update. Anyone care to hear this?

Eric: Not really, but go ahead.

Laura: Go right on ahead. [laughs]

Andrew: All right, it’s just a little update. It’s not like it’s going to take up your time.

Eric: Too late.

Andrew: I’ve got to admit, I’m – I’ve got to be honest, I actually hit a little writer’s block. I know this happens to JK Rowling, it’s happening to me now.

[Eric and Laura laugh]

Andrew: Now I know how she feels. Yeah, the first – the first night that I came up with the idea to write this, I was throwing out lyrics left and right, I had it all down. And now I’m having a hard time coming up with new lyrics, but I think I’ll have that done within the next few weeks. And right now, I’m actually looking for – I’m looking for venues to start playing some live gigs. And Micah, you live up in the New York City area. I’m thinking Madison Square Garden?

Micah: Yeah.

Andrew: Do you think that would hold our…

Micah: You’ve heard of that place?

Andrew: …listening audience? Yeah.

Kevin: I…

Andrew: Now, how many seats does that place have?

[Laura laughs]

Kevin: I was thinking more the Port Authority.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: No, I’m actually…

Eric: Can you imagine…

Micah: Yeah, you can open your guitar case and people walk by and throw you some spare change.

Andrew: I’m serious about this. Micah, how many seats does…

Micah: Wow, I’m going to get…

Andrew: …Madison Square Garden have? Just ballpark.

Micah: I want to say probably 20-25,000.

Andrew: All right, that is going to be a problem…

Micah: It’s a very small venue.

Andrew: …because we have about two million listeners.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: This is going to be an issue. We’re going to have to look into a bigger place.

Laura: They just have to stand, you know, outside.

Andrew: Ah, good point.

Laura: You know, way, way back. You can put up big screens.

[Andrew laughs]

Micah: Yeah, you know what they can do? There’s a TV above Penn Station.

Laura: Yes.

Micah: They can broadcast you live up there.

Laura: There you go.

Andrew: Oooh, okay.

Eric: Can you imagine the mosh pit? For Andrew?

Andrew: I don’t think Penn Station can hold the amount of listeners we have either.

Micah: No, but they’ll be outside and they can watch you on the TV on top.

Andrew: But we have – all right, all right.

Eric: Andrew, trust me.

Andrew: All right, I think we can do that.

Eric: If they show up to do the New Year’s with, you know, Dick Clark, I’m pretty sure that they…

Andrew: [sighs] All right, okay. I’m just – you know, we have a big audience. I just don’t want to, you know, leave anyone out.

Micah: Here, I found it. It holds 18 for hockey and 19 for basketball. So…

Andrew: That is – that is actually really small. [laughs]

Micah: Yeah.

Andrew: Wow. Hmmm. Okay, we’re going to have to find somewhere…

Micah: You need a bigger venue.

Andrew: Yeah, we’re going to have to find somewhere else.

Micah: How about the Meadowlands – in Giants Stadium?

Kevin: Oh, yeah.

Micah: There you go.

Kevin: There you go.

Andrew: I like that.

Micah: Now you’re talking like…

Andrew: Good thinking, Micah.

Micah: …like 75,000 thousand, at least.


Enlightening 2007


Andrew: And we also have a new announcement, everyone, that we will keep bugging you about up until mid-July. MuggleCast will be at Enlightening 2007, which is a conference similar to Prophecy 2007 and Lumos 2006. We announced this earlier this week, along with the Wizard Rock band Moaning Myrtles, and I’m actually hoping to open for them. I’ve got to let them know, you know, about my new Wizard Rock band. Maybe they’ll let me open for them. But anyway, the point is we will be doing a live podcast from Enlightening 2007. Me, Ben, and Jamie are definitely signed on. No word yet on the other co-hosts. Eric, you’re going to be in New Zealand?

Eric: Yeah, but I might come home depending on – I’m going to go to Prophecy, so I don’t know…

Andrew: Right.

Eric: …when I’m coming in for that.

Andrew: It’s, like, three weeks before Prophecy.

Eric: Yeah, so I don’t know, depending on school.

Andrew: All right. Micah, Laura, and Kevin are still undetermined. Ben, Jamie, and I are actually going to be in – we’re going to be here chilling in South Jersey, so it’s going to happen to work out. But we’re also going to be teaching a workshop on podcasting. It’s going to be four like, hour-long sessions – probably, this is all very still in the works. [laughs] But we’re going to be teaching a workshop on podcasting, so if you want to learn more about podcasting, maybe how to start your own, we’re going through everything. We encourage you to come to Enlightening 2007. Also, they’re going to have some seminars. They’ve got a lot of great stuff planned. Just go to light…Enlightening07 dot…

Oh, no, no, it’s Enlightening2007.org, and you can sign up. It’s going to be in Philadelphia and it’s going to be a lot of fun. So, that is…where are the dates? July 12th to the 15th, 2007 at the University of Pennsylvania, and we’re looking forward to it a lot. So, sign up right away and actually, we’re going to be doing the live podcast at Enlightening the night of Order of the Phoenix‘s United States release, so there’s going to be a lot of excitement going on that night.

Eric: Andrew, you, maybe…

Andrew: We’re going to be talking about the film.

Eric: …you can open for the live podcast.

Andrew: Yeah. That would be like Bono opening for U2, though.

[Eric and Kevin laugh]

Andrew: Doesn’t make sense.

Eric: Well, or you could just break out in song in the middle of the podcast. I don’t know.

Andrew: That’s true, that’s true.

Eric: Just a few ideas to play out with, I mean, you know?

Andrew: I don’t know, I might get stage fright. I’m not sure. I don’t know how this Wizard Rock band is going to work out.

Eric: Stage fright? Oh

Andrew: Yeah, I’m not sure yet.


Voicemail: Ginny and the Veil


Andrew: And, as we’ve been promising for the past few weeks, Episode 66, this is our all voicemail show! Yaaayyy!

Eric: Wooo! Except half of it was talk.

Kevin: [laughs] Yeah, no kidding.

Andrew: We’re hitting up the phone lines – yeah. We’re hitting up the phone – it was just me ranting. We’re hitting up the phone lines tonight with lots of voicemail questions from you guys. Let’s get started. Let’s get this party started.

[Audio]: Hi guys, my name is Nick from Illinois and you guys mentioned a couple of shows ago that Ginny can hear the voices beyond the veil, but she would have to see someone die, and we don’t know if she’s seen anyone die so far, but do you think that she could have seen Moaning Myrtle die through Tom Riddle’s diary? Thanks, I love the show! Bye!

Andrew: Does Nick mean see Moaning Myrtle like when she went into the actual diary?

Laura: Well, I think that that would be the only way that it would’ve worked, and I’m not sure Ginny did go into the diary. Did she?

Kevin: Not to mention, how plausible is it that she saw someone die through a diary that she thought was actually good?

Laura: Well, the only this is, Nick told Harry or, not Nick [laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] The voicemail caller told Harry?

Laura: [still laughing] No.

Andrew: I didn’t know that they talked.

Laura: I got confused. No, Tom Riddle told Harry that he got Ginny to trust him by showing her things, but he wasn’t terribly specific about what exactly it was he showed her, or if he just, you know, kind of let her read his diary or whatever. I don’t know if he actually took her into that and showed her things, though.

Andrew: Well, I would think that that would definitely gain her trust, showing how Moaning Myrtle died, because – sorry, Eric’s calling. Because I’m sure she was really curious about that. So if Tom was like, “Alright, you want me to show you her death?” and she saw it.

Laura: But – but then wouldn’t she have known that he was the one that killed her? And why would – why would you trust someone like that?

Eric: Well, actually, he was.

Kevin: Yeah, and would he have…

Eric: Yeah, because when Moaning Myrtle recounts this – the tale of her death, she said she hears or she heard, a boy’s voice…

Laura: Yeah, it was, but…

Eric: …in the bathroom, like calling up – because he opened the [phone rings] sorry, phone.

Laura: No, but he would probably…

Eric: Sorry, phone. Because he opened the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets, and apparently like right then and there – like when Moaning Myrtle poked her head out to see, you know, to tell the boy to get out of the girls bathroom, that the basilisk came and she saw the…

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: …eyes. So, technically…

Kevin: But then again, would – why would that instill trust in Tom Riddle by showing that?

Eric: No, I don’t necessarily think that.

Laura: Unless, I mean…

Eric: Yeah.

Laura: Unless he showed it to her from the point of view that he wasn’t there. You know?

Eric: I don’t think…

Laura: I mean, Tom Riddle was obviously a very powerful wizard. If he wanted to show her something…

Kevin: I would think it was sort of a long stretch though.

Laura: Yeah.

Kevin: When you see, you know? There’s war videos when you see – technically, you’re seeing people die. But you don’t – it’s not the same as being there.

Laura: Yeah. I think the only way it could have worked would be if Tom had taken Ginny into his diary the same way Harry went into his diary. And I’m not sure that’s what happened.

Kevin: But even then, does it have the same impact?

Eric: Well, no. What I’m thinking is that he wouldn’t – I don’t think he even would show her when he killed Moaning Myrtle, you know? That wouldn’t instill trust or anything. I just think it’s a matter of Voldemort shares a part of himself with Harry, that’s why Harry can speak Parseltongue, because some of his powers transferred. I think in the possession of Ginny some certain aspects like the ability to see Thestrals or hear voices or any of that sort, Voldemort has certainly seen death. So, why can it not just be like that vague connection that Voldemort shared with Ginny that allows her to hear the voices? Instead of this whole, “Oh, he showed her someone dying, and therefore she knows what it’s like.” Why can’t it just be the connection that Voldemort shared with her? Maybe anybody Voldemort possesses, at any point, would therefore be able to see Thestrals and hear voices because of Voldemort’s strict connection with death.

Kevin: Did we even establish that the Veil was related directly to death?

Andrew: Well, no. What we were talking about in, like, a couple weeks ago was that maybe it’s a near death that lets you hear the voices beyond the Veil. Wasn’t it?

Kevin: Yeah, that’s what I thought we had said. But in that case, then, just the whole fact of Ginny’s experience in Chamber of Secrets

Eric: Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, that’s true, because…

Laura: Yeah. I think…

Kevin: …could account for that.

Eric: Oh, yeah.

Laura: I think Eric brings up a good point, because if you’ll remember Riddle said something about like how he would pour a little bit of his soul back into Ginny to keep her alive long enough to carry out his plan and stuff.

Eric: Or something like that.

Laura: Yeah. What if there is something there? I mean, obviously…

Eric: Well, what Kevin said.

Laura: …Harry…

Eric: Yeah. Kevin was quick to point out, too – Nick said, “Who has Ginny seen die?” But Ginny herself was in a near death experience. I think we sometimes seem to forget that she was lying on a floor for, you know, on a chamber floor, on a cold, wet chamber floor dying, near death as her energy, her life force, was being sucked out of her. I mean, that’s a near death experience if there ever was one. So, Ginny is very well qualified to see these things and hear these things. Just because of that.

Micah: I don’t know. I kind of relate it back to Harry and the whole idea of Thestrals with, why didn’t he see it before if he was – he experienced death at such a young age? And it said because at that point he didn’t really understand what it was. I don’t necessarily know that if Ginny was in a trance and she really knew what was going on.

Kevin: Yeah, that’s a good point.

Micah: And she would remember anything that would allow her to recall the death, if she even experienced it in the first place.

Eric: Well, whether or not she knows what’s going on, Voldemort knew what was going on when he did it, and he was just showing her his perspective, his whole – I think if you touch Voldemort, if you stand in Voldemort’s presence, I think something happens to you where death is just all around you. I mean, that’s a sign of his evil. That’s the kind of thing I’m imagining. Maybe it’s far-fetched.

Micah: How come Tom Riddle didn’t die from the basilisk?

Eric: Well, maybe he…

Laura: Because he controlled it.

Kevin: Yeah.

Eric: [laughs] Because then there would be no Harry Potter series.

Andrew: Yeah.

Micah: So, what if Harry started speaking Parseltongue? Would the snake listen to him?

Eric: Well, it did almost.

Andrew: Probably not.

Eric: Well, didn’t it? It was either in the movie or in the movie and the book, where Tom Riddle made it only listen to him instead of like…

Laura: I know that was definitely in the movie. I can’t remember if that was in the book.

Eric: It was definitely in the movie, because Christian Coulson said that, “It only obeys me now.” But, you know, something like that. Technically Harry could speak Parseltongue, and that’s how Harry can understand it later. I think it – I can just see Harry using Parseltongue to infiltrate Voldemort’s lair in Book Seven or something like that, using it further. But I thought it was cool that Harry had to pretend that the sink faucet was a real snake and said, “Open,” and that it worked, and he kept saying, “Open,” to the various doors. That kind of stuff, that kind of stuff is cool, but almost underplayed; but we kind of know it’s there. So I think it’s going to play a bigger part later. All these…

Andrew: Back to the original question.

Eric: Yeah, back to the original question.

[Andrew laughs]

Eric: All these connections with Voldemort, I just think the fact that Ginny was connected or that she had that near death experience.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: It doesn’t necessarily mean one of her aunts or uncles – that reminds me! Molly’s brothers, Gideon and Fabian Prewett, died and maybe through seeing Molly’s woes, you know, mother-daughter kind of thing, maybe Molly talked about them to her, I don’t know.

Kevin: I think it was… I think it still…

Andrew: I think it has to do with the Chamber of Secrets.

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: That situation was just too…

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: …dark.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: Well, if your mother is as overbearing as Molly is, too, I’m pretty sure you get a good enough idea of what she is talking about. Like if she says, “Look out for this,” you really have to find out what “this” is.

Andrew: Alright, next voicemail. I honestly thought that question was going to take us like five seconds to answer.

Eric: Yeah, I thought so, too.

Laura: [laughs] Me, too. I did, too.


Voicemail: Pensieve in the Cave?


[Audio:] Hi, MuggleCasters! I’m Nicole, 14, from Virginia. I have always thought the stone basin that Dumbledore had to drink out of was actually a Pensieve with the memories of the children he had tortured there. That’s why the children did not tell anybody what had happened, because they couldn’t remember. Another thing that convinced me is what Laura said in a previous episode: You guys were talking about the Brain Room and how the brain had attacked Ron and maybe left him with memories. Laura compared Ron’s acting to Dumbledore when he drank from the basin. So, if Ron was reacting that way because of the memories, maybe the basin was actually a Pensieve. Love the show! Jamie, you’re my favorite.

Eric: Oh. Well, you know, isn’t it…

Laura: [in flirty voice] Oh, Jamie.

Eric: Isn’t it great to hear that Jamie is her favorite, and she thought of this when hearing something Laura had said on a previous episode?

[Laura laughs]>

Kevin: Yeah, that’s great.

Eric: Wait a minute! Wait a minute!

[Micah laughs]

Eric: As I recall, I mentioned a very similar theory I brought up. And a ten year-old told me it was the worst constructed theory he had ever heard.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Eric: He said, “It’s a pretty weak theory, isn’t it?” [laughs]

Andrew: When was that? At the LIVE podcast?

Eric: Yeah, the podcast -not we did in New York or Vegas, but the one that we record…

Andrew: L.A.

Kevin: I’ve actually got…

Eric: No, the one that we…

Andrew: Oooh, that one.

Eric: Yeah, and somebody told me…

Andrew: I remember that. That kid was awesome.

Eric: Somebody told me he was the same guy who said he was Yoda from the MuggleNet chat room. You know, from so long ago?

Andrew: Who left a voicemail?

Eric: Yeah, who left a voicemail.

Andrew: Oh, good old Yoda.

Laura: Oh.

Andrew: I’m going to write a book on classic MuggleCast moments.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: That’s definitely one of them.

Eric: It’s a good question, so let’s answer it.

Micah: Well, I think I brought this up on an earlier show, actually. And I think he’s seeing either what’s going on right then, or what’s going on – or what’s going to happen very soon in the future. Because the school is coming under attack, and he is constantly talking about, “No, not the children, not the children.” And I think he is seeing his worst fear come true, and that’s Hogwarts coming under attack and him not being there to defend it.

Laura: I think so as well. Not to mention the liquid in the stone basin was green. Pensieves are white.

Eric: It’s…

Kevin: Yeah, but I always thought that it was like Voldemort’s view of the future. Like, his, I don’t know.

Laura: Well, that could also be Dumbledore’s worst fear – would be Voldemort’s…

Kevin: It’s possible, yeah. I suppose so.

Laura: …like, outlook for the future.

Andrew: Greatest desire. Yeah.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: So, wait, Micah, you’re saying that Hogwarts is going to be under attack?

Laura: Well, it was in Half-Blood Prince.

Micah: No, I’m saying right at that moment that’s exactly what was happening. When he was in the cave…

Andrew: Oh, oh, okay.

Micah: Yeah.

Andrew: Gotcha.

Eric: I think Dumbledore muttered a lot and muttered a lot less, “not the children,” than he did, “the pain, make it stop, I know I did wrong.”

Laura: Yeah, but he says, “don’t hurt them.”

Eric: Well, kind of. But maybe. He said a lot of other things.

Laura: No, it’s not kind of. He says, “don’t hurt them.”

Eric: In that episode I brought up a lot of the other things he said that supported my theory then, including, “the pain, make it stop,” and, “I know I did…” It seemed like what the children would say if Riddle was torturing them in that cave. So, I venture the theory that maybe all of…

Micah: No, he wouldn’t be saying that. I mean, that’s almost coming from another person’s perspective, saying, “don’t hurt them.” If you’re saying that “them” is the children, the children can’t be referring to themselves.

Eric: No, but I don’t think if Dumbledore was seeing the children get upset that he would actually behave that way.

Micah: Yeah, but he’s got to be reliving somebody’s moment right there.

Eric: Well, yeah, he could be reliving – what I’m saying is, maybe in order for someone to obtain the Horcrux properly, you have to fully be able to live, like, the experience that Voldemort wishes to encase in this Pensieve or this basin, which is the memory of his torture, his cruelness, his cruelty, to these children. So, you relive – it’s kind of like a mark of why this place is significant. It was almost as if you collect the puzzle pieces you can get inside into Voldemort’s favorite moments if you go on a Horcrux – it’s like a photo album. Think of all Voldemort’s Horcruxes as – Horcrux locations as a photo album and you go back to it, like the Gaunt house was smashed and nobody knows exactly what he had to do to get it, but you had to understand a little bit about Voldemort’s past to find the Gaunt house. I’m just saying, I thought it tied in more with what he did than with anything that was going on in the future.

Micah: It’s possible.

Laura: I don’t know, I just don’t think that that liquid behaved like a Pensieve, because…

Eric: It was…

Laura: …whenever…

Eric: …obviously different and you couldn’t tap it with your wand and put it in your brain or anything like that.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: You couldn’t make it show you anything. It didn’t have to be…

Micah: It was there for a while, it was a little moldy, you know? So…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Moldy Pensieve.

Eric: Moldy memories. Yeah.

Micah: But, it almost looked like he knew what he was about to drink, so I don’t know.

Laura: Yeah. I think Dumbledore…

Andrew: He must have known what he was getting himself into.

Laura: I think he did, too, absolutely.

Andrew: Yeah. Yeah, it’s like Pensieve Juice, basically.

Eric: I agree with you because he wanted water afterwards.

Andrew: Makes you go mad and it doesn’t pull memories.

Laura: I’d have to say that that’s my final conclusion on that topic.

Eric: So, maybe a Pensieve, maybe something related to memories. It makes sense but we don’t know what, and it was definitely a little bit different at any rate because it could only be drunk and things like that.

Andrew: Yes.

Laura: All right, next voicemail.


Voicemail: Where is Krum?


Audio: Hey guys, my name is Tamara and I’m from Chicago. And briefly you guys mentioned on your last show, Viktor Krum, and it occurred to me that I think Jo said that he’d be back, or we’d hear from him again. So if we do in Book 7, what do you think might happen if he returns to Hogwarts, or the Hogwarts area and he and Hermione meet up again, considering Hermione and Ron are “together” now? Love to hear what you guys think… Love the show!

Andrew: [in a high-pitched voice] Gossip time!

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: I think if he comes back, I think Ron will get ticked off about it, but I don’t think that Hermione would get together with him or anything.

Andrew: Yeah, if Ron and Hermione are together now, I think Hermione is probably over Krum.

Laura: I don’t think she was ever…

Eric: I was going to say, was she…

Laura: …really that much in – really infatuated with him to begin with.

Andrew: Why don’t you think so?

Eric: Well, she liked him. She liked the attention.

Laura: I think, yeah, she did, but I think she was using him to get to Ron. [laughs]

Andrew: Oh.

Eric: Well, I don’t know about that. Initially, but she did like – I mean, he liked her, he genuinely thought she was this pretty girl, which she had never gotten from Harry or Ron, and she realized immediately, she’s a smart enough girl that Viktor wasn’t particularly loquacious or whatever it was. But, I just don’t think that Viktor – if Viktor came back, I think if this… If Tamara is asking about whether Viktor will play a part in a relationship that would make Ron jealous or whether Viktor will be jealous to find Hermione had moved on. In Book Six Hermione did say she was still writing to Krum, I think, didn’t she? Like, just…

Laura: I know she was in Book Five.

Eric: Or maybe it was Book Five.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: And so, I don’t know when J.K. Rowling said that we were going to hear back from Viktor Krum. I don’t know that it would be like the same situation with Fleur where it’s like all of a sudden, big character again from Book Four. I don’t think that will happen.

Andrew: And why would Krum return to Hogwarts?

Micah: I think he would fight on the side of the Order.

Andrew: Well, I guess because Jo said that he’s going to make an appearance.

Laura: Yeah…

Micah: And actually…

Andrew: Or we’d hear from him.

Eric: When did she say that, though? That’s my only question.

Laura: Yeah. [laughs]

Eric: Because depending – if she said that before Book Five, there you go, Hermione is still writing to him.

Micah: No, I think she has bigger implications. And…

Laura: No, I think she meant like an actual reappearance.

Micah: And at the end of Goblet of Fire, Dumbledore makes a point of saying…

Laura: And I know she did say it, I just don’t remember where.

Micah: …”these connections that you make this year are going to be important in the future.”

Laura: Yeah, he said, “You’ll always be welcome at Hogwarts.” So…

Kevin: Yeah, you sort of expect that the people that you’ve been seeing throughout the books are going to play a role in helping Harry, so, you sort of expect he’ll show up somewhere.

Eric: I think Viktor would be a good leader and be a good helping hand to Harry. It seems there was some confusion whether or not he’d be like a jealous kind of boyfriend. Like, if Hermione went with Ron or something. I think Viktor, especially in the movie, portrays him as a very understanding, very mature kind of guy in addition to being this sports hog, which the books didn’t. As far as him understanding and being able to cope with a lot of things. The books made him a lot, “Hermy this, Hermy that,” he couldn’t even get her name right. And the movie kind of made him more flesh and blood, more humane, kind of like – kind of more like a role model.

Laura: The movie portrayal really doesn’t have any bearing on what he’s going to be like in the book.

Eric: Which is why we have to see. Well, what was he like in the books? He was kind of duck-footed, kind of not really…

Laura: But, at the same time, I don’t see him being the jealous type, really.

Andrew: J.K. Rowling said at the World Book Day chat back on March 4th, 2004, after Order of the Phoenix‘s release that, the question was, “Will we be seeing Krum again any time soon?” Jo replied, “You will see Krum again, though not soon.”

Eric: Oh.

Andrew: Which implies to me, “not soon.” If it was “soon” it would be Book Six, “not soon” would be past it.

Kevin: Yeah, the next book, right.

Andrew: Right. Yeah, so, there you go. So, it doesn’t have to do with Book Five, so that does mean…

Eric: So, maybe Viktor Krum will show up at the end of Book Seven, help Harry defeat Voldemort, and then he’ll be looking down at his elbow which now has a scar.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: And Viktor Krum shows up way later in the series. It works. Never mind.

Kevin: Okay.

Andrew: All right. Next voicemail.

Kevin: Yeah, please. laughs

Andrew: That quote came from Accio-Quote.org. Thanks to them.


Voicemail: Tiara Horcrux?


[Audio]: Hi, MuggleCasters! This is Roxanne, 15, of Ontario. I was doing some research on theories in the forums on the Ravenclaw Horcrux, and a bunch of these people think that it could be a tiara, possibly Great Auntie Muriel’s goblin-made tiara mentioned at the end of Book 6. It’s shiny enough for Voldemort, and could represent the encirclement of the mind, very appropriate for Ravenclaw. Just wondering what you guys thought. See ya! Oh yeah, Happy Pickle Day!

Andrew: Pickle Day! Woo! Ow!

Eric: God, that’s an old voicemail.

Andrew: Did I tell you guys how I celebrated? 6:30 AM: Wake up, cut school, go to the supermarket, purchase ten jars of pickles and I eat them all day in my room, while going to myself, “Pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle,
pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle.” But it was my mouth full so it sounded like [makes muffled noise]. But anyway, that’s how I celebrated.

Kevin: Then you skipped the next day because you were sick.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: I was – no, Kevin.

Eric: The next three days you were subsequently home sick from school from eating that many pickles.

Kevin: Exactly. That’s what I’m saying.

Andrew: Oh! That’s not true. I can take pickles like nobody else.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Moving on!

Micah: Where did this thing come from? Sorry. I really don’t remember.

Laura: The tiara? It was at the end of Half-Blood Prince, whenever they were talking about Fleur and Bill’s wedding, and Mrs. Weasley and Fleur got all teary with each other. She said that she had a goblin-made tiara in the family that she was going to let Fleur wear at the wedding.

Micah: How would Voldemort get a hold of it, though?

Andrew: Mhm.

Laura: Now, if that’s…

Kevin: Yeah, but he’s a pretty resourceful person.

Laura: Yeah, exactly. But assuming that it’s true – and let’s just discuss
this for a second – what kind of connection could the Weasley family have to the Ravenclaw house?

Eric: Oh my god, wait a minute. If you realize, wasn’t Hepzibah Smith like a direct descent of Hufflepuff? And she had some of those family heirloom thingies? And we don’t know that the Weasleys are directly related to Ravenclaws – that would seem unlikely – but the Weasleys are a pureblood family, even though they’re blood traitors or whatever, but aren’t they a pureblood family, and we know that in the past pureblood families such as the Malfoys have potential to have Slytherin possessions and, therefore, makes sense that if the Weasleys are pureblood, they could, not necessarily even be related to Ravenclaw, but I guess pureblood families are who you look to first if you wanted to find some of the old relics of famous wizards such as the Founders. Is that making any sense?

Kevin: Yeah, it’s plausible. I like how the voicemail said, “shiny enough for Voldemort.”

[Eric and Laura laugh]

Kevin: As though shiny is one of these…

Eric: As opposed to it being Ravenclaw’s…

Laura: But doesn’t Molly saying, “I have it,” imply that she knows where it
is?

Micah: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: I mean, why would Voldemort make something into a Horcrux and leave it
at the Weasley house?

Eric: Well, what about Peter Pettigrew?

Laura: What about him?

Micah: [laughs] Is he a Horcrux?

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: No, he’s not a Horcrux! But look at that. What is the…

Andrew: Eric’s implying that Pettigrew could of taken it.

Eric: No, no, no. I’m not even implying that. What is this faithful servant of Voldemort’s doing under Percy’s pillow, or sleeping with Percy at night?

Kevin: Wait, what? [laughs]

Eric: Strange things, strange tragedies and strange things befall the Weasleys. That’s all I’m saying. How did a rat, who was actually a man, hide out for years and years under the Weasley family? They accepted him as a pet. Why are you questioning the unlikeliness or the likeliness of a tiara…

Laura: Well, I’m just… Do you think that…

Eric: …that Mrs. Weasley has being a possible Voldemort thing? Voldemort and the Weasleys have been connected before. Voldemort possessed their daughter. I think there’s more connections between the Weasleys and Voldemort than there is a lot of other people.

Laura: Yeah, but you have…

Kevin: Yeah, but, but…

Laura: …to consider that – sorry, Kevin.

Kevin: No, it’s okay, go.

Laura: That Voldemort… I mean, it’s a piece of his soul and we’ve seen
that he does a lot to protect those. Why would he choose something that was
in the possession of a family he would consider blood traitors?

Eric: Ah, now I see your point and I actually agree with it.

Kevin: Yeah, it’s true.

Eric: Because the only reason the diary was even out there was because
Voldemort…

Laura: Because Lucius gave it to Ginny.

Kevin: Was because of Lucius.

Eric: Well, Voldemort personally gave it to Lucius. He removed it from
wherever it may have been hiding it at the time. So, do you think that by
those means that all of Voldemort’s Horcruxes are hidden? Therefore, not
likely to be things you would find outside of booby-trapped things, with the exception of the locket, which has obviously been removed from the cave.

Kevin: Yeah, but the locket could be booby-trapped.

Laura: Yeah, it could.

Micah: Is the locket removed from the cave, though, that’s another
question.

Eric: Well, the locket

Laura: Yeah, the locket was at Grimmauld Place.

Micah: Well, don’t you remember when Harry was in the cave and he said, however you say it, “Accio Horcrux,” and the thing flew up from under the lake?

Laura: I always assumed that was an Inferi.

Eric: That was just something trying to block the Accio spell; the summoning spell.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: Because immediately after Dumbledore said, “As I would have guessed the summoning spells, it won’t be that easy.”

Micah: Oh, okay. Sorry.

Eric: Basically, yeah. So, I think that was, what are they called? What are they called, what are they called? The dead people.

Laura: Inferi.

Eric: Thank you. And I think it was one of them just jumping up and down and he’s
like, “We’re not alone.” But the Horcrux wasn’t in the lake, and if it was that would really, really stink.


Voicemail: What are Dementors?


[Audio]:

Hi, MuggleCast. This is Tracey, and I have a question about the Dementors: I was wondering what they’re classified as, because they’re not in Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them at all, and they’re not human at all. So I just wanted to know what you guys think. I love MuggleCast! Bye.

Eric: This is a good question, and…

Andrew: A ghost because they float.

Eric: …I have a theory but you guys go first. A ghost?

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: A specter?

Eric: A specter? You think so?

Kevin: I don’t know if they would be classified in any of the Fantastic
Beasts classifications, if that’s what they mean. I mean…

Eric: Well, Lethifolds were.

Kevin: Yeah, but these are sort of like a class of their own, kind of.

Andrew: Mmm. I don’t know.

Eric: Let’s look at Dementors. Okay, they feed on human emotion, on
happiness. We don’t know if it’s strictly limited to humans or we might, but…

Laura: It is limited to humans.

Eric: It is limited to humans? Okay.

Laura: Yeah, because Sirius escaped by turning into a dog.

Eric: Oh, right. Well, they detect, yeah, they detect strong emotion and they thought he
was getting ready to die or they thought Barty Crouch was getting ready to die because he was getting weaker. So, it’s humans – strictly the human range – but they suck the happiness out of a place, we know they mate in like cold weather conditions. Kind of misty, muggy, coldness.

Laura: Fog. [laughs]

Eric: Fog. [laughs] That’s the word I was looking for. I heard a theory once that and I know it’s been speculated but it’s actually been quite cool. I want to know what you guys think about this: That Dementors may be man-made creatures, as in wizard-made creatures, to guard the facility. Think about it: What if Dementors were man-made?

Laura: I don’t think so, because…

Kevin: I don’t think so.

Laura: …why would it talk about them breeding?

Kevin: Exactly. That’s the whole…

Eric: Man-made things can breed. That’s like a robot. That’s like
building an artificial intelligence that can duplicate itself.

Andrew: But they don’t exist.

Kevin: But, we haven’t. There is no robot that can breed.

Andrew: But then again, who is to say that you couldn’t create something that could reproduce? I think that makes sense.

Eric: We alter flowers. We change their colors and things like that. Like,
why can’t wizards create something that…

Laura: Yeah, but have we ever created a flower?

Eric: Well, we’re not geniuses exactly.

Kevin: Exactly.

Eric: I mean, we’ve created new breeds.

Andrew: If you can create it to kill, why couldn’t you create it to reproduce? It’s magic. I think that makes sense.

Eric: I think if you can create something that’s actually like – I mean, obviously we’re talking about the top people, but if you are a wizarding government and you need to keep inmates in. You know, if you need to keep criminals at bay, why would you not create a creature that is disgusting, is absolutely terrible, it feeds on human happiness.

Laura: But Dementors weren’t created for Azkaban. They used to be on Voldemort’s side.

Eric: Well…

Kevin: And I don’t see them creating – any good person would not want to bring a creature into the world that was so bad.

Eric: Oh yeah?

Laura: Well, I don’t doubt that someone stupid would make the mistake of creating something like that, but I don’t think it was, just because we knew that the Dementors were on Voldemort’s side during the first war and they probably are now.

Eric: Couldn’t they have been in Azkaban before they were on Voldemort’s side, or would that have said they had rebelled before or something? What I’m saying is their origin is very unknown, so I just wanted to pose that because I…

Kevin: Well, the origins are unknown, but if you’re describing Dementors to someone who doesn’t know what Dementors are and you know they were created, you don’t say, “They are the creatures guarding Azkaban.” You say, “They were the creatures created to guard Azkaban.”

Eric: No, but who said that?

Kevin: You know what I’m saying?

Laura: I was always under the impression that they were considered so, you know, kind of disgusting that no one really took the time to classify them.

Eric: Well, in Lord of the Rings, you get trolls and what am I saying? Trolls. Orcs – they were kind of like elves or something in mythology of Lord of the Rings? They were like…

Kevin: In Lord of the Rings? Oh, no.

Eric: Elves are trees, but if you burn trees or something…

Kevin: Lord of the Rings it goes – no, because in Lord of the Rings there’s a long back story that involves, somewhat of demigods….

Eric: Oh.

Kevin: …coming down and creating. One of the demigods was jealous of the others and created…

Eric: Kind of like a fallen elf.

Kevin: Right, but in that case – Lord of the Rings – it was actually godlike. He had to be…

Eric: Well, I know to build the Uruk hai, the super elf, you have to burn the trees and like do this. What I’m saying is, you know like with Dementors – just the heinous beasts that they are.

Kevin: Well, it was also, like many of the creatures in Lord of the Rings, was a mutation of a creature that already existed, like an elf like Eric was saying.

Laura: Yeah, that’s what I thought.


Voicemail: Luna’s Parents in the Order?


[Audio]: Hi MuggleCasters, this is Miranda, 17 from Idaho and I was just wondering what do you think of the possibility that Luna’s parents were in the Order? It seems really likely to me since Luna is so willing to fight against Voldemort, and with her dad owning The Quibbler maybe there’s something they could communicate, however, we never hear from Moody that they are in the picture or anything, and we never hear anything else. So I just wanted to know what your thoughts were. Thanks! Love the show!

Kevin: You have to remember that the Order was a very select group of people…

Eric: Yes.

Kevin: …that was put together by Dumbledore and people that were directly next to Dumbledore and had been taught by him to fight Voldemort. It’s not saying that her parents didn’t fight Voldemort and didn’t stand against him, but I don’t think they were in the Order, no.

Eric: This is a problem as a result of JKR writing about a select group of people, about focusing on, you know, the people in the Order. You say – it comes down to – you think it’s Order and Voldemort but really, just like Kevin said, you know, the Order is a select group of people and it doesn’t mean they weren’t on the good side, Luna’s parents. It seems clearly that Luna’s father is kind of whimsical, kind of like, you know, has the right idea at least being politically aware that things could be wrong with the world and her mother seems like a great witch. So, I’m sure they would be on the good side, but not in the Order. I don’t think it’s going as far as to say, “Okay. Seamus’ parents are good, where are they in this photograph?”

Laura: Yeah, and the Weasleys weren’t…

Micah: Well, even the fact that the Weasleys weren’t…

Laura: Right.

Eric: Yeah, the Weasleys weren’t even in it.

Micah: Good thought, Laura. Very good thought. [laughs]

Laura: Great minds think alike, Micah.

[Kevin laughs]


Voicemail: Will Harry’s Patronus Change?


[Audio]: Hi MuggleCasters, this is Posey from Sydney, Australia. I was just thinking of something the other day: In book six we learned that Tonks changed her Patronus because of a great emotional upheaval. Do you think Harry will have the same thing happen to him? I mean, do you think that his Patronus will change in Book Seven because of the change that he’s having around him and his great battle with Voldemort? And if he does survive Book Seven, do you think his Patronus, at the end of his battle with Lord Voldemort, will be changed forever? Just thinking. I think you can answer my question. Thanks a lot. Bye.

Kevin: No.

Micah: No.

Laura: Why not?

Eric: Well, it happened once, will it happen again?

Andrew: Why? What’s the…?

Kevin: Not to mention it’s – no. It hasn’t happened once. His Patronus has always been the image of what his father was: the Stag. Right? So, it’s sort of like that one whimsical thing about Harry that she’s not going to change.

Laura: What if it’s like – if it becomes Harry though? What if it’s not like mirroring his dad anymore? For once he’s stands up and people see him…

Andrew: On his own, yeah.

Laura: Yeah, you know?

Eric: Harry does mirror his dad.

Kevin: Yeah, but…

Laura: He does, but…

Kevin: …I never thought of it like that.

Laura: But everybody always says, “You look just like your father.”

Kevin: But I’ve always seen it as the piece of his father that he never got to actually see. You know? Like…

Eric: He treasures most.

Kevin: It represents his father in him.

Eric: In such a great way.

Kevin: Exactly.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: You know if emotion was going to change Harry, you know if high stress was going to change Harry’s Patronus, wouldn’t that have happened already?

Laura: I don’t know. I mean…

Eric: You know, high enough stress in Books Three, Four, Five and Six.

Laura: I don’t know. There could be something really horrible that happens in Book Seven that causes it to change.

Eric: It’s kind of, I want to use the word enigmatic, which is kind of you know a cool word. Somebody’s going to give me five points for using that word. But it’s enigmatic that Tonks…

Micah: Or take five away for using it the wrong way.

Laura: Yeah. [laughs]

Eric: Oh. Oh, crap.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: You know Micah, you’re right.

Micah: I’m just kidding, go ahead.

Eric: It’s…[laughs] All right, Tonks. You know? The whole emotional thing that she went through? Tonks’ Patronus changed, but it turns out in the end of Book Six it was just because she was having some kind of relationship anxiety with Lupin, you know. She kind of wanted to try something with him, but he was totally like, “Yeah. I don’t really want to do that. I’m too old for you, kid.”

Laura: Yeah, but people process stress differently.

Eric: So, but she took it… Yeah, and she took it to heart and that’s why it changed her Patronus. Even though, I mean, it’s interesting that JKR, and it’s enigmatic, that JKR should introduce this kind of idea that a Patronus can be changed by heightened emotion or stress when it doesn’t seem to apply to a lot of other people. I mean people are like – yes, your Patronus can change, but that doesn’t mean if you go through stress that it will change.

Laura: That doesn’t mean for sure, but I think it’s a possibility.

Kevin: Right.

Andrew: Yeah. I think…

Laura: Because Harry has this enormous weight on his shoulders. The entire wizarding world is – I mean, if he doesn’t succeed, they’re screwed.

Andrew: Yeah. I think this would just upset Harry even more. I think he likes having his dad’s Stag, to be honest with you.

[Eric and Laura laugh]

Eric: It’s true. If his Patronus changes because of stress he’s going to be more stressed out because his daddy won’t be there to protect him. I mean, that’s what his Patronus is essentially – is a way for Prongs to really live. Like in Book Three, they said, “Prongs rode again tonight,” just because of the…

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: Harry’s Patronus…

Andrew: In a way, his father is helping him out.

Eric: His father is helping him out, and…

Laura: I always took that as James living on through Harry.

Andrew: That’s really nice.

Laura: But I don’t know. I just don’t think that…

Andrew: Well, that’s what we’re saying, basically.

Laura: I know, but I think that a big theme of Book Seven is going to be Harry standing up on his own, and I think that…

Eric: Well, it’s not going to change to him. Your Patronus can’t be yourself, or that would be really stupid, if, like, it…

Laura: No, I’m not saying it can be yourself, but it can be something that relates more to you.

Eric: Than your father?

Laura: It’s…

Eric: Than your father, whom you love, and would have given anything to meet? I don’t know.

Laura: I’m talking about, for instance, Hermione’s Patronus is an otter.

Kevin: Something personal.

Laura: Yes, exactly.

Kevin: Yeah.

Laura: And I’m not saying that a father isn’t personal, but…

Eric: Hmmm.

Laura: …something that is more like Harry’s personality.

Eric: Okay. Well, I think that’s the difference between a Patronus and Animagus. If Harry were to turn into an Animagus, it wouldn’t be a stag, that’s safe to say. It would be something that relates more to him, like, maybe a beaver. [laughs]

Kevin: I just don’t think…

Laura: Okay, but does Hermione’s Patronus turn into an otter just because her mom likes otters?

Eric: No.

Andrew: How does an otter scare away Dementors? [laughs] I don’t get that at all.

Eric: Well, it – no, it doesn’t matter what it is. A Dementor – what a Patronus is, it’s an essence of concentrated nothingness. [laughs]

Andrew: It – it was meant to be a joke. Sorry.

Eric: Yeah, okay.

Andrew: But, I mean, just kind of laugh. [laughs]

Micah: My thought was that Tonks changed it herself, that she didn’t change it because her emotions changed, because when she goes up to the castle to bring Harry back right off the train after Draco broke his nose…

Eric: That was a good scene.

Micah: …what happened was that Snape obviously makes a snide comment about her Patronus changing, and I thought she said something along the lines of, “Well, I did it because….” So, that implies to me that she changed it, not that it just automatically changed.

Eric: Oh.

Laura: I don’t remember her saying that, but I could be totally wrong.

Eric: So could I.

Laura: I just remember Snape saying that it’s weak.

Kevin: Yeah.

Eric: Oh, yeah, and that – she totally flushed then, but he knew what it was. He knew she changed it to look like Lupin, which is what it was, even though it was like a creature on all fours that Harry quickly mistook as Sirius, but I think it was actually Lupin, or the werewolf, or like a werewolf form.

Laura: I don’t know. I guess we’ll have to…

Andrew: Very interesting.

Laura: …wait to find out about that. Yeah.

Andrew: That was good, though.

Eric: That was a good answer.


Voicemail: How Do You Kill a Werewolf?


[Audio]: Hey, MuggleCast! This is Peter, age 13, of Atlanta, Georgia. “Pickle!” as Andrew says on the message. I was calling with a theory. Well, not so much a theory, more of a question. Jo said on her site that Remus Lupin will not be killed by Peter Pettigrew’s silver hand, and I agree with that. I think that would be really dumb, but she said the only thing that could kill a werewolf is a silver bullet. Does that mean that Remus wouldn’t be killed if he was hit with the AK? And if so, where would a wizard get a silver bullet to shoot Remus with, since that’s a Muggle item? Thanks so much! Love your show! See you later!

Andrew: Well, I mean, all you’ve got to do is go into the weapon store and pick it up. [laughs] To be honest…

Laura: Yeah, well, I think the important part of that question is she said that, yeah, the only thing that kills…

Andrew: A silver…

Laura: …a werewolf is a silver bullet, so could he be killed by Avada Kedavra?

Eric: That’s such a – like, a weird question. It’s good, but it’s, like, it’s weird.

Kevin: Well, a werewolf…

Eric: Yeah.

Kevin: … can’t be killed, but Lupin in his human form…

Laura: Form probably could, yeah.

Kevin: Probably could.

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: So, he’s not indestructible. [laughs]

Kevin: Right. It’s sort of like the benefit of being a werewolf, if there is one, you know?

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: When you are uncontrollable and you can’t help yourself…

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: That is the one time you’re invulnerable to the Killing Curse.

Eric: But I don’t think you’re ever invulnerable to the Death Curse. I mean, if you’re living and you’re…

Micah: We’ve talked about this before. Ben mentioned one time – well, if Hagrid got hit with a bunch of them, would it take, like, ten of them to kill him, or would he just take one, and that’s it?

Eric: Because of thicker skin or something, and I know a few of us were under the impression that…

Andrew: Being a half-giant. Yeah

Eric: … thick-skinned or not, one soul, one life force, but then everybody else was like, you know, dragon hide, or armor, or Avada Kedavra armor. Or… [laughs]

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: Right.

Eric: So, yeah, but I think when Jo was talking about this, it was kind of about the mythology of werewolf, because, you know, Pettigrew’s silver hand, obviously, and that was like, okay, so that’s kind of plot foreshadowing, or it could be; silver and werewolves, what about Peter Pettigrew killing Lupin? And JKR, I believe it was something, said that that won’t happen, as this voice mail mentions, but I don’t – but by saying that only a silver bullet can kill a werewolf, at the same time, it’s not really saying that only a silver bullet can kill a werewolf, as in Avada Kedavra can’t? If somebody went up and hit – what’s the bad werewolf’s name, that Draco threatens Borgin with that he knows?

Micah: Fenrir Greyback.

Eric: Gren – Greyback. Fenrir Greyback. Thank you, Micah. Fenrir Greyback, I mean, Dumbledore – well, Fenrir got the crud beat out of him that night on the tower, and if somebody AK’ed him, I’m pretty sure that would have worked.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: You know, human form or not, I think even in wolf form, the Avada Kedavra should kind of work.

Micah: I don’t see any silver bullets in Book Seven, sorry.

Laura: No, I don’t, either.

Eric: There aren’t any guns.

Kevin: I don’t, either.

Laura: I don’t know.

Eric: Were there ever any guns in the Harry Potter series?

Laura: I don’t know, but I think the point is that Jo words her answers very carefully, and if she’s saying the only thing that can kill a werewolf is a silver bullet…

Kevin: Yeah.

Laura: … it’s not out of the realm of possibility to say that werewolves can’t be killed by the Avada Kedavra curse.

Eric: It’s true. It’s just interesting, also, because Moody emphasized it in Goblet of Fire, and this is my final point on this, in Goblet of Fire, Moody said that Harry is the only survivor of the Death Curse, and plenty of people have said that. So, would that be not including werewolves? Only human survivor of the Death Curse, or only living being that survived the Death Curse? Because how important is Harry in this whole thing? Is he just the only human boy who survived it if werewolves are impervious?

Laura: I believe he’s…

Micah: Then there would be a mass transformation to like [laughs] all different types of creatures, so they don’t get killed.

Eric: Yeah, that’s…

Laura: I think that Moody said, “the only person known ever to have survived it.” So, yeah.

Eric: Huh.


Voicemail: Spending Time at Privet Drive


[Audio]: Hi, this is Jessica from Florida, and I have a general voicemail question. I was just wondering if there was a specific time limit to the amount of time that Harry has to spend at the Dursley’s for Dumbledore’s magic to keep its effect? JKR mentioned that the time he spent during Half-Blood Prince at the Dursley’s was the shortest time that he had ever spent there, which was two weeks, so I would think that he would spend two weeks there during Book Seven just to be safe. Additionally, do you even think that the magic still exists because of Dumbledore’s death? I love the show, and I’ve been wondering this for a while, so I’d love your input. Thanks, bye!

Laura: I don’t think that it was a spell that Dumbledore used…

Micah: Yeah.

Laura: I think that it’s magic that’s created…

Micah: I agree.

Laura: …because of Petunia’s connection to Lily, so I think it is still there.

Eric: Yeah, it was, it was a blood connection, even though Voldemort… [laughs] Sorry, even though Dumbledore performed that spell on Privet Drive, it should still hold, as long as the blood relation is there.

Laura: Yeah, as long as Petunia will take him in.

Eric: Or as long as Harry calls it home or whatever.

Laura: Yeah, exactly. So, and – yeah.

Andrew: With that said…

Laura: But, I mean…

Andrew: Well…

Laura: Theoretically,

Eric: Oh, good, that means that…

Laura: …it kind of answered your question: Could Harry be protected for another year if Petunia just invited him into the house for dinner? [laughs] Or does he actually have to stay there for a certain amount of time?

Micah: Well, he has to go back.

Andrew: Yeah, that’s – that’s what we’re…

Micah: There’s no question about it.

Laura: Well, yeah, of course.

Micah: He was pretty much told, wasn’t he?

Laura: But how much time? How long does he have to stay?

Eric: Well, until he turns a man, until he turns 17.

Andrew: No, no, no, no. We’re talking about how long does he have to go before he can go back to Hogwarts again.

Eric: Oh.

Andrew: How, how…

Laura: Like, how long does he have to stay with them…

Andrew: Like what he’s been doing over the past few summers?

Laura: …that summer, yeah.

Micah: Until the wedding, probably.

Eric: Until he turns 17. No, and…

Kevin: Yeah, and they get sort of like a – it’s a limitation to the protection, kind of?

Micah: I would say until the wedding.

Kevin: I mean…

Micah: That would be my guess.

Andrew: Why?

Eric: Not until the wedding, because…

Andrew: Why?

Eric: …he turns – Dumbledore says that as soon as he becomes of age, the protection will wear off, so…

Kevin: Right. It’s sort of like the family protection of a child. Once you are considered a man, you are now responsible for yourself and are responsible for protecting yourself.

Eric: The two weeks just has to deal with the fact that by the time Hogwarts is over and they go home, it’s actually mid or late June, or maybe even July, so that it’s only two weeks or so until his birthday. That’s what I thought it meant.

Micah: Do we know when they’re getting married, though? I mean it would seem like an easy way out, for him to leave. I think also that he might realize, “Hey, well, when this protection wears off, there’s a good chance that the relatives that I do still have alive, as much as I hate them, are going to be in danger.”

Eric: Yeah, that’s true. It’s very true. Once the protection is off, then people, then Voldemort can set foot in Privet Drive if he wanted to, and really turn things upside down. So, it makes sense, that yeah, that he would turn seventeen – but the voicemail’s asking when is the protection good for. I think that’s until his birthday.

Laura: You think it’s good until his birthday?

Micah: But…

Kevin: Right, same here.

Laura: I think that’s probably the best answer.

Eric: There’s no saying – yeah. There’s no saying he won’t leave Privet Drive only to go to wedding right away. I mean, that’s cool. But, I think it’s still his birthday.

Andrew: I think he’s going to want to be out. I cannot picture him sitting there while all this is going on.

Eric: Well, he did…

Andrew: I mean, he’s done it in the past books, I know. But in this situation, especially with Dumbledore dead.

Laura: Hey, that could be… Yeah, that could be… What if Harry decides that it’s not worth the protection to stay, and he leaves?

Eric: Whoa!

Laura: No, and then he’s without the protection. What if something extremely drastic happens and he refuses to stay there?

Andrew: Right. Because, he’s going to want to – the protection’s going to wear off, come his birthday, anyway, so why hold out?

Kevin: Why stay there…

Andrew: An extra month or two.

Kevin: Yeah. And what are they going to be expecting? I mean, Death Eaters, they know he’s chilling around the house…

Andrew: This Book Seven should just…

[Everyone laughs]

Kevin: Come his birthday, they are all going to on the door, at the door, you know?

Eric: Okay, seventeen, let’s all go.

Andrew: This Book Seven should just be called Order of the Phoenix 2 because there’s going to be so much stuff involving the Order.

Eric: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah, there will be. [laughs] There is going to be a lot of stuff involving the Order.

Andrew: It’s meant to be a joke.

Micah: [mockingly] Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Kevin: [mockingly] Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Andrew: It wasn’t well recepted.

Eric: Funny.

Andrew: It’s true, yeah it is.

Micah: I thought he has to stay there for at least one night. I thought that’s what he was told.

Eric: One night? Oh, one night after his birthday, do you mean? Or…

Micah: No, he has to return to Privet Drive for at least one night.

Laura: I thought that…

Eric: To seal the protection.

Andrew: What does that do? Renew your protection juices?

[Laura laughs]

Micah: Maybe there’s something we don’t know. Do you know what I mean? Maybe there’s something that’s going to happen as a result of him staying there.

Laura: Yeah, I thought that Dumbledore always said that so long as Harry could call it home.

Eric: Well, that was, for all intents and purposes, it was that long in Book Three, when he said it or something.

Andrew: But I think what we’re saying is, how long do you have to stay in the house to renew your…

Laura: Subscription to your protection.

Andrew: Whatever. Your subscription. Yeah, exactly.

Eric: I think basically what all was said was, “The protection will no longer be good once Harry’s on his own,” and along those same terms he said, “The power will still be good while you can call it home, until you come of age,” is basically the whole perspective of what I think was going on. I don’t know.

Andrew: Yeah. All right. Let’s move along.


Voicemail: Luna the Seer?


[Audio]: Hi MuggleCast! I was just wondering if I could get your opinion on whether you thought Luna Lovegood was a Seer of some sort, since she seems to always be coming up with these strange thoughts, and Professor Trelawney is pretty strange herself. So, maybe. Anyways, just wanted to hear what you think. Thanks, guys! Love the show! Pickles!

Laura: I don’t know. I mean, I think it’s possible, but at the same time…

Andrew: I think it’s a silly question.

Micah: No, no. She doesn’t have that prophetic name.

Laura: There are no stupid questions.

Micah: Not Cassandra or Sybil.

Andrew: She’s Loony Lovegood!

Eric: She’s weird!

Micah: Yeah.

Eric: Like Andrew’s saying. She’s a little weird…

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: She has little stray thoughts that her father probably implants in her brain, and…

Laura: Although I do have to say, to her credit, if she were, she wouldn’t run around bragging about it.

Eric: That’s true.

Andrew: Why not?

Laura: Because she’s not that kind of person.

Andrew: Oh yeah.

Laura: She’s not like Trelawney, she wouldn’t run around saying, “Oh, I have this ability, and I can do this and this and this,” because she’s just not that kind of character.

Eric: Yeah, she doesn’t preach. She doesn’t preach. She doesn’t throw the Rotfang conspiracy around in everyone’s faces, saying, “Fudge has got this Ministry guard of werewolves and we’re all going to die.” She doesn’t say it to people, she just believes it.


Voicemail: Do the Dursleys Have a Stable Marriage?


[Audio]: Hey guys, this is Paige from Maryland. Quick question for you: I wanted to know if you thought that Vernon and Petunia’s relationship was stable, or what you thought they were about, because apparently Petunia knows some stuff that Vernon doesn’t know, and they’re hiding stuff from each other. So, just wanted to know what you thought about that. Thanks! Love you all! Bye!

Andrew: Not to judge, but, don’t all…

[Laura laughs]

Laura: Andrew’s going to say, “Don’t all marriages…”

Andrew: Don’t all wedd – don’t all relationships – yeah. Isn’t there something hidden?

Eric: Marriages have secrets? Well, yeah. That kind of goes along with the first sentence of the book. You know? “Mr. and Mrs. Vernon Dursley were proud to say they were perfectly normal.” Unfortunately, being normal entails marital problems or secrets or some kind of ghosts in the closet. Who doesn’t have ghosts in the closet?

Kevin: Yeah. Skeleton in the closet, you mean?

Eric: [laughs] Did I say ghosts in the closet?

Laura: Yeah, but I think the point here is that Petunia knows much more about magic and the wizarding world than she is willing to let on to to Vernon.

Andrew: Well, maybe Vernon doesn’t want to know.

Eric: There’s part of that.

Laura: He seemed to want to know in Order of the Phoenix though.

Eric: Well, kind of. The Order of the Phoenix really accentuated Vernon’s situation, because here he has owls flying in and out, and Vernon’s here, and his wife told him a long time ago that she didn’t like her sister very much at all, or her husband, and Vernon accepted that. And then Harry shows up, and of course it’s this tie that Petunia doesn’t really like. And so, Vernon keeps quiet about it. He’s an obedient husband, and he grows or this dislike for magic grows on him to the point where he’s ripping up Harry’s letters from Hogwarts all on Petunia’s behalf. Then, all these owls start coming, his son is attacked, and he’s completely flipping out, which is exactly what Petunia would have wanted him to do, except at that very moment Petunia says, “This boy has to stay here.” And Vernon is in such a pickle.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: And I did just say pickle.

Kevin: Yes, you did.

Eric: But he’s in such a pickle because here he’s this guy who didn’t ask too many questions because he knew it would upset his wife. We’ve had the leisure, the privilege of having that insight into Vernon before. You know? He’s that kind of guy. He doesn’t want to upset his wife, but yet she knows so much more about him that she doesn’t let on, and it’s just this ongoing kind of thing where he won’t ask but he kind of should know because it’s just a matter of time before Petunia has to divulge it.

Andrew: Right.

Eric: With Harry’s situation, I just love that character aspect about the Dursleys. It’s easy to see them as comical people, but they are a real family, and something’s really going on with Vernon and Petunia. Is it a stable relationship? Probably not, but I don’t really see Vernon packing his bags and walking out and saying, “You don’t tell me nothing.” I mean…

Andrew: I think it’s just rocky now. They were obviously in love when they got married and Harry got in the way, but they knew they were going to pull through it eventually. It’s not going to be soon. Not until Book Seven is long gone.

Laura: Yeah, I agree…

Andrew: I don’t know.

Laura: I think that despite the fact that they’re not the world’s best people, I think that they do love each other.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: But obviously the crux is that Vernon doesn’t know, and he doesn’t really have the nerve to ask too much.

Andrew: I just think he’s afraid to know?

Laura: Yeah, and he doesn’t…

Eric: He is afraid.

Laura: …want to upset her, either. He said so in the first book, that he didn’t want to ask too many questions because it would tick her off.

Eric: Right. But this hatred for magic and different people…

Micah: Yeah, where does it come from?

Eric: …really is brought out in Petunia. Well, it’s brought on by Petunia to begin with, is what I think.

Laura: Yeah, because he loves Petunia, and he doesn’t want anything to upset her.

Eric: So, he adopts her morals, but now she’s kind of betraying that. She asked him to become this guy who says, [imitates Vernon] “Enough effing owls.” But, really, it’s kind of, you know? She’s now going back on that, and she has to kind of admit, “Yeah, the Dementoids guard Azkaban.” So…

Laura: Okay, so next one.


Voicemail: Did Dumbledore and Petunia Make an Unbreakable Vow?


[Audio]: Hi guys, this is Dara from Santa Monica, California. This is a very late response to Episode 57 about Aunt Petunia, but while I was listening to it in the car on the way home today, I was thinking of a theory that could possibly answer the, “What is Dudley’s fear?” question, and, “What it is about Aunt Petunia that we don’t know?” My theory is that Aunt Petunia maybe made the Unbreakable Vow with Dumbledore before Harry was left with the Dursleys. There is obviously many enchantments left over Privet Drive to ensure Harry’s safety until he is of age, but do you think that Aunt Petunia has made a vow to keep Harry there until he is 17? That would explain why she said he had to stay in the fifth book, when Vernon obviously wanted him to go away. But, [laughs] I can’t quite get over the fact that he did leave Privet drive in the third book, but since he was immediately taken in by the Ministry, maybe it doesn’t count. Maybe the Unbreakable Vow was told to Dudley, in which case his greatest fear is Harry leaving and his mother dying from breaking the Unbreakable Vow. [laughs] Tell me what you think. I know it’s far-fetched, but I couldn’t get it out of my head while listening to Episode 57. Thanks a lot, and I love your show! Pickles rock!

Laura: I think what she’s saying is that perhaps Dudley’s worst fear could be his mother dying as a result of breaking an Unbreakable Vow, or as a result of…

Micah: No.

Laura: …something to do with Harry.

Micah: No, no, no. Okay, he wasn’t even old enough to witness it.

Eric: Yeah.

Micah: If the vow took place. I mean, he wouldn’t even know what was going on.

Laura: No, I don’t think so either.

Micah: So, I don’t think there is any chance.

Eric: He’s an obnoxious boy, and…

Laura: I’m not sure it’s because of the vow. I think that his greatest fear could be something to do with…

Micah: His greatest fear is an empty fridge, all right?

[Eric and Laura Laugh]

Laura: I don’t know. I think, though… I mean, I think that – we were just talking about with Vernon and Petunia, they’re not the world’s greatest people, but they love each other. And I think that Dudley loves his parents, despite the fact that he’s a little twit. And…

[Micah laughs]

Laura: …I think that he realizes that especially after Order of the Phoenix that…

Micah: Hey, Laura, how do you feel about Dudley?

[Andrew laughs]

Laura: I think he’s great. But I think that he realizes especially after Order of the Phoenix that what Harry is tied up in is very dangerous, and that it could be a threat to his family. So, his worst fear could be…

Kevin: Yeah, I think so, too.

Laura: …Death Eaters or Dementors, or whatever, raining down on his house.

Eric: The greatest fear is the unknown, but there is the thing, if we’re talking about Dudley’s fear, there is the thing that Dumbledore alluded to about the mistreatment of Dudley, like, “I will not abuse your son any more than you have.” And Dudley went silent, and everybody else was sort of like, “Okay, what the heck is he talking about?”

Laura: I don’t think that he’s talking about that kind. I think he’s talking about abuse, like being spoiled.

Kevin: He’s talking about…

Eric: Oh.

Kevin: Right.

Eric: Kind of like Willy Wonka said to Augustus Goup’s parents. But would you guys say that – this whole vow thing, I just want to put an end to this, at least as far as my thoughts go. I think when the Dursleys agreed to take him in to begin with, when the Dursleys picked Harry up in his little blanket – plaid blanket, if we’re to believe the movies – and took him into that house. As soon as they took him into that household, I thought that that was sealing the deal.

Laura: Yes.

Eric: That was doing a vow. That was – I don’t think there was a separate occasion where Petunia met Dumbledore for tea, and they had to lock hands and do a vow. I think just – the letter probably would have explained, “By taking him into this house it is sealing this magical enchantment that I put on it. Try and give him enough of a home. I mean, otherwise the protection won’t work.”

Laura: And I think that Petunia realizes that despite the fact that she doesn’t want anything to do with this world, that her world could be in danger as a result of not taking Harry in.

Eric: Exactly, and there’s only…

Kevin: Yeah, that’s true.

Eric: …so much you can be ignorant, too, before you have to start understanding what’s going to affect you.

Micah: And Dumbledore would never put somebody else in a position where they would risk their own life, so to speak, in terms of a vow.

Laura: Yeah, I don’t see him forcing someone to take an Unbreakable Vow.

Eric: Yeah, that’s what we said to begin with, as far as in – you know, when Book Six first came out. Would he do a vow? Well, no, because he trusts people. Plus, it could be sealed in other magical enchantments.

Andrew: All right. Well, phew! That was a lot of voicemails, boys and girls and Micah.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: So, like Dementors aren’t…

Kevin: Yes, it was.

Laura: They’re not human and they’re not animals, Micah is just Micah? He’s not…

Andrew: Micah. He’s his own species. I’d take that as a compliment. Micah?

Kevin: It’s true.

Micah: I do. I take it as a compliment.

Andrew: Oh, okay. Good.

Micah: Yeah.

Andrew: He’s – you’re an anchorman. You’re not a man, you’re not a woman, you’re an anchorman. That’s what it comes down to.

[Micah laughs]


Update on Robin’s Challenge


Andrew: We have an update, now, on Robin’s Challenge, which we brought to you last week, from a mature listener, who e-mailed asking for other mature listeners to e-mail in and let us know that they listen.

Eric: Let’s differentiate between mature and older. I mean…

Andrew: Yeah, because we got an e-mail about this earlier today. They were like, “Well just because – the younger listeners aren’t immature!”

Laura: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: And I replied and said, “Well, mature doesn’t mean…”

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: “Robin doesn’t mean mature as in older, Robin means…” Oh, no, no, no. “Robin means…”

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: “… mature as in older, not as in immature.”

Eric: [laughs] Yeah. Basically adult fans.

Andrew: Right. Yes. Thank you. Okay. The first one comes from Terri, 53, of Saint Louis, Missouri. She writes:

“Hi Guys! I’m 53 years young and have been listening to MuggleCast from the first episode. I have three grownup sons, so I’m used to listening to video game talk. I’m not a gamer but listening about the new Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix game might make me try it! Great show.”

Eric: Wow!

Andrew: “I also listen to PotterCast and SnapeCast, but since you are the first podcast I ever listened to, you have a special place in my heart.”

Laura: Awww.

Eric: Awww.

Andrew: Well thank you, Terri. How nice of her. Lauren, 54, of Connecticut writes:

“Okay, I fess up, I am a MuggleCast fan who is of ‘a certain age’. I have been listening to you guys since the third or fourth show, and I get a lot of laughs and good feelings from it. I just think that with all the negative things that are going on in the world, it is encouraging to hear young people put their attention into putting out something that makes people feel good. It may be true that it is important not to put your head in the sand about the state of the world, but I am a firm believer in creating your universe, so I am completely in support of what you are doing.”

Eric: Oooh!

Andrew: “If more people were like some of the characters of Jo’s books, and courageously made efforts to resist the temptation to be cynical instead of making a difference with their words and actions, we will be a much better world for it. Go MuggleCast!”

Thank you, Lauren, for that. Another one, Diana, 41, of California writes:

“Hi, I am addicted to the show – Diana.”

[laughs]

Micah: She’s 41.

Andrew: That’s what I said.

Micah: I thought you said she was addicted to the show.

Laura: No, he said Diana, 41, of California.

Andrew: Oh, she put…she wrote…

Micah: Oh.

Andrew: “Hi, I am 41 and addicted to the show.”

Another one. Actually, I’m surprised we got this one. Albus Dumbledore, 150-ish…

Eric: Whoa.

[Eric and Laura laugh]

Andrew: Writes – er, from – he heard of us through word of mouth. Location: If I told you, Jo would really kill me.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: Albus writes:

“I have a few confessions to make. I was moved by Robin’s letter on last week’s MuggleCast episode. I am a mature listener, at 150 years of age, and I am ‘coming out of the closet,’ if you will.”

That’s very nice of him.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: “Not only am I a very mature listener, but I am not really dead. If I were dead, I wouldn’t be able to e-mail you right now. I assure you, there is no Internet reception behind the veil. Yes. Well, that is all. Signed Albus.”

[Eric laughs]

Laura: I think we need to change our little captions on the main page, to say, “Appearance by Albus Dumbledore.”

Andrew: Yeah, well that, too. Yeah. [laughs] And who other, oh, Narcissa. The next one; Sylvia, 23, of Boston writes:

“Well, I’m not really ‘of a certain age,’ because I’m only 23, however my father and sister do fall into the category of ‘a certain age.’ My father is 66 and finds Harry Potter to be a pleasant enough read, that I was encouraged to buy him a copy of The Science of Harry Potter: How Magic Really Works. My sister’s 31, and she loves the books. I am the only one who is a MuggleCast listener, however, because I am the only one with the time to play with iTunes. My mother is, unfortunately, not a Harry Potter fan, because she is not a fan of the fantasy genre. Just isn’t her cup of tea.”

This last one comes from Emiras, 35, of the Fresh Meadows in New York. She writes:

“I am a 35-year-old Harry Potter and MuggleCast fan. I have been listening to the Podcast for about a year now. Like Robin, I enjoy hearing people exchange ideas and theories on a subject I hold near and dear. Between working full-time and being a mom to my own 11-year-old Weasley twin.”

“Twins,” I guess she meant.

“I don’t have much time to myself; I look forward to my weekly MuggleCast listening times – if it’s on the bus, on my way home from work, while cooking dinner for my family, or listening while in the bath after a long day, I look forward to each new episode. Some working moms have yoga, I’ve got Andrew, Ben, Kevin, Jamie, Micah and Laura to keep me sane. Keep up the great work, guys!”

What?

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Oh, oh, she missed you. Oh, wait, that… [laughs]

Eric: Ummm…

[Andrew and Laura continue to laugh]

Laura: Oh.

Andrew: Well, I will admit Eric sometimes drives us all insane.

“Keep up the great…”

Eric, I’m sure it was just a mistake.

Eric: [Grunts skeptically] Uhhh.

Andrew: “Keep up the great work, guys. Your enthusiasm is…”

Does she mean “contagious” or “contiguous”?

Eric: It’s “contiguous.” She’s cool.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: “Your enthusiasm is contiguous, and…”

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: “…inspiring to us older listeners.”

Eric: I got Andrew to say “contiguous.”

Andrew: “Thanks for the smiles.”


Eric’s Crackpot Theory of the Week


Andrew: We have a Crackpot Theory for everyone, this week.

Eric: Oh, crap. I mean, crack… pot.

Andrew: Eric Scull!

Eric: Uh.

Andrew: This one comes from Jacob, 24, of Texas:

“Percy Weasley will help Harry contact Sirius behind the Veil.”

Yep.

Eric: Uh. Well, Percy – as a Ministry official – would have, maybe, some information regarding the methods of doing anything, I guess. I don’t know. The Unspeakables – Percy is not an Unspeakable, but he is an Undersecretary to the Minister or was, at one point. I – it’s not too unlikely that if Percy is, in fact, good, in fact, or is, in fact, willing to help Harry, that he would know where to go about obtaining any information, be it, well, more specifically, stuff that goes on in the Ministry. If he’s the Undersecretary to the Minister, and the Minister would need to write a note to the Unspeakables, Percy would probably dictate or Fudge would dictate, he would write it down, he would know where to take it. What I’m saying is Percy would have the information, because he works at the Ministry. Doesn’t mean he knows everything about the Veil, but it seems likely that Percy would be able to access any kind of data or findings on the Veil, that were up-to-date, if he should, perchance, want to find it.

Andrew: Okay, well, Jacob actually took a different approach. He went on Wikipedia, and he found the, not the definition, but the name origin, Micah, of “Percival,” and it derives from Old French. “Percival” in Old French, meaning, “pierce the veil.”

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: So, that’s what he’s thinking. That’s kind of interesting…

Eric: It’s because of… [laughs] I know why. It’s because Percy has such a pointy head, that when they throw him through the Veil [laughs] it’s going to pierce it. Sorry.

Andrew: Yeah, well. I guess so…

Eric: Because it comes to a point.

Andrew: And then two other points he brought up, was:

“That he works at the Ministry and, of course, could potentially have access, and he has to do something to make up with his family.”

Kevin: This is true.

Andrew: Okay, that’s Crackpot Theory of the Week.


McDonald’s Update


Quick McDonalds update; hopefully we got all of our submissions in. They were due by the end of November. It’s now – what? December 2nd?

Kevin: Yeah.

Micah: Yes, sir.

Eric: Yeah.

Micah: Third. Third.

Andrew: Third – December 3rd. Recording early in the week, folks. This is a different type of show for us, for once. But yeah, so I’ll be posting the McDonalds Challenge winners. Well, I’ll be posting everyone’s entries hopefully within the next week or so, and the winner will be receiving a free MuggleCast t-shirt.

Eric: And a book.

Andrew: So look forward to those.

Eric: And a book. And a book.

Andrew: Oh, and a copy of the book. When my sequel comes out, I’ll also sign that for you and get that off to you.

[Eric laughs]


Show Close


Andrew: Now, that does conclude MuggleCast, Episode 66.

[Closing music plays]

Andrew: Hope everyone’s enjoyed the show. If you would like to contact us, you could always dial 1-218-20-MAGIC in the United States. If you’re in the United Kingdom, you can dial 020-8144-0677. If in Australia, you can dial 02-8003-5668. You’d think after how many times now I’ve announced these, I actually would remember them. No. Still don’t remember them. You can also Skype the username “MuggleCast.” Leave a voicemail question. I think we’ve been through enough voicemails today to last us…

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: …another year. [laughs] At the rate we’ve been going.

Eric: I think we just caught up for the past 20 episodes we haven’t had them on. So…

Andrew: Yeah. And let us know what you thought of doing an all-voicemail show.

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: Maybe we’ll do them more often. Of course, we need the voicemails to supplement the episodes. And if you want to send us something, something, an actual item you can mail it to the MuggleCast PO Box. That’s PO Box 223, Moundridge, [stumbles] Kanja – K, K, K – Kanjas? Kansas, 67107. You can also contact us on the MuggleCast Feedback Form. Just go to MuggleCast.com. Or, if you want to contact us directly, it’s our first name at staff dot mugglenet dot com.

So, once again, that concludes MuggleCast, Episode 66. I am Andrew Sims.

Kevin: I am Kevin Steck.

Eric: I am Eric Scull.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Andrew: Bye, bye.

Laura: Bye.

Micah: Bye. [laughs]

[Music concludes]


Bloopers


Andrew: MySpace, MySpace, MySpace, MySpace.

Eric: LiveJournal.

Laura: Oh, my God! MySpace.

Andrew: Don’t forget our MySpace.

Micah: Frappr.

Andrew: Become our friends, Frappr, Facebook – I’m going to make a song…

[Micah and Laura laugh]

Andrew: That’s going to be my next Wizard Rock single. It’s going to be promoting all of our outlets – our community outlets. [sings] MySpace, Facebook, YouTube, Frappr, Last.FM! Fanlisting Forums. MySpace, Facebook, YouTube, Frappr, Last.FM! Fanlisting Forums.

Eric: [joins in] It’s the Frappr Map! It’s the Frappr Map, it’s the Frappr Map…

Andrew: Not bad for a first try.

Eric: …Rap.

Andrew: I’ll have to demo that.

Eric: Frappr Map Rap! Frappr Map Rap!

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: I like that. I like that, Eric. I’m signing you on.

Eric: Sweet.

Andrew: Come over to my house and we’ll record a new song…

Eric: The Frappr Map Rap. Yeah!

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: When… [laughs] I like it, I like it. The YouTube…

Eric: Uh, sing, The YouTube Cube?

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: The MySpace…

Micah: Place.

Andrew and Eric: Place! Ah!

Andrew: Bye, bye.

Eric: I wonder what the outtakes are going to be.

[Laura and Eric laugh]

Andrew: It’s going to be an awesome new single.

Laura: Yeah, me too.


Micah: That’s all the news for this December 2nd, 2006… No, today’s the 3rd. That’s all the news for this December 3rd, 2006 edition of MuggleCast. Back to the show.

———————–

Written by: Micah, Adrienne, Amanda, Briana, Eloise, Jessica, Judy, Mandie, Margaret, Martina, Matt, Megan, Sarah, Shannon and Shelly

Transcript #65

MuggleCast 65 Transcript


Show Intro


Andrew: Just in time for the holidays, GoDaddy.com now offers gift cards, available as e-gift cards or a personalized mail card, GoDaddy gift cards can be used for domain names, hosting or anything else from the GoDaddy.com website. Additional discounts do not apply to the purchase of gift cards, but can be used when redeeming them. Plus, as a listener of MuggleCast, enter code “Ron” when you check out, and get your dot com domain name for just $6.95 a year. Some restrictions apply, see site for details. Get your piece of the internet today at GoDaddy.com .

[Intro music plays]

Andrew: Because you still haven’t ordered 11 more MuggleCast T-shirts – thank you Kate, 20, of Florida – this is MuggleCast Episode 65, for November 26, 2006.

[Music continues to play]

Jamie: Two men own yachts. One of them puts his yacht on a river of milk. The other man disapproves considerably, and maintains that such a substance could never keep the balance of the boat at optimum efficiency. The second man puts his yacht in a river of coffee. The first man discusses openly his lack of respect for this decision. Again, the two yacht owners voice their contempt for each other. This creates a very tense atmosphere and both men begin having a huge, huge public argument about their differences in terms of yachts. However, one of the men is a lot more accepting and apathetic than the other. In the end, he turns around and says, “Okay, seriously, let’s stop arguing. Whatever floats your boat.”

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Oh, boy. What a way to…

Ben: Jamie, I know why the fangirls love you so much.

Andrew: Oh, yeah, I know. What a way to start off our 65th …

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: …episode of MuggleCast.

Ben: How many?

Andrew: You know – 65th.

Ben: We’re ready to retire.

Andrew: We could…

Ben: Isn’t 65 the retirement age?

Andrew: We’re good. Yep, we’re done. This is it.

Ben: All right.

Jamie: We’re getting our special pensions, soon.

Andrew: We do have a good show for everyone this week. We got a special interview with the creators of the Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix videogame.

Ben: By the way who did that? Who’s in that interview?

Andrew: Me and [whispers] Kevin.

Ben: You didn’t invite me?

Andrew: It’s not that I didn’t invite you; you weren’t around.

Ben: When was it? When did you do it?

Andrew: It was at noon, two weeks ago.

Ben: Thanks. Thanks a lot, dude. Thanks for inviting me.

Andrew: Sorry. Why are you asking now? Why didn’t you… [laughs]

Jamie: Ben, surely you realized after he’d recorded it…

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: …that you weren’t on it.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: I didn’t know when he recorded it.

Andrew: My name is Andrew Sims.

Ben: My name is Benjamin Carl Schoen.

Jamie: My name is Jamie Matthew Lawrence.

Eric: My name is Eric James Matthew Padfoot Scull.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

[Music continues to play]


News


Micah: Jason Isaacs recently spoke to The Observer about his upcoming projects, and, of course, a little about Harry Potter. He said:

“I spent two weeks having a wand fight with Helena Bonham-Carter (who plays
Bellatrix Lestrange) and Gary Oldman (who plays Sirius Black). Potter is a well-oiled machine now, whichever director is in charge, although it’s a slow process working with all those special effects. But it’s such a laugh – five weeks hanging out with Oldman and Maggie Smith (who plays Professor McGonagall) and Michael Gambon (who plays Professor Dumbledore), who’s a right mischievous devil.”

Speaking of good ole Lucius, Forbes magazine has released a list of the wealthiest fictional characters, and Lucius Malfoy came in at number 12, three places better than last year’s number 15 ranking. The site estimates his net worth to be $1.3 billion.

The Guardian is currently running a competition where entrants must guess the title of Book Sven, and the one judged to be the best and most innovative will win a JK Rowling-signed bookplate. The contest will close at midnight on December 6th.

Electronic Arts, maker of the entire Potter video game series, on Tuesday announced a new video game: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix! The press release can be checked out over on MuggleNet.com.

HBO on Demand is currently airing a special preview of the Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix movie. The preview runs for almost four minutes, and includes tons of new footage, including behind the scenes glimpses at the making of the movie.

Be sure to check MuggleNet.com for other various Order of the Phoenix videos, interviews, and photos, including some of the interior of the Ministry of Magic; Harry and Mr. Weasley attending the disciplinary hearing; the writing on Harry’s hand from Umbridge’s quill; Azkaban; concept art of Grawp; a Death Eater; and pics from the set of Snape’s storage room.

Dan Radcliffe will fly to Melbourne, Australia, for the Australian Film Institute awards. On December 7th, Daniel and some other celebrities will announce the winners in the Melbourne Exhibition Centre, with a national telecast on Channel Nine at 9:30 PM.

Finally, in a very special edition of the Leaky Mug released earlier this week, you can learn the details of how Grimmauld Place will appear in the fifth film, hear about the Potter set in general, and much more from Andrew’s special visit to the Order of the Phoenix set.

That’s all the news for this November 26, 2006 edition of MuggleCast. Back to the show.

Andrew: All right. Thank you, Micah.

Micah: You’re welcome.


Announcements


Andrew: Micah, you know there’s a lot of hot stories this week; Order of the Phoenix

Micah: There were a lot of hot stories.

Andrew: There were. You want to tell us about them?

Micah: No, absolutely not.

Andrew: Good, because we’re actually…

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: …going to wait until later in the show.

Micah: See I knew that. I knew you were going to say that, so…

Andrew: [laughs] We’re going to get – we’re going to focus…

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: This show is basically about…

Ben: The movie.

Andrew:Order of the Phoenix and the inter – yeah, the movie in general. We have a couple of rebuttals, of course, but first we do want to talk about some rebuttals. Or, eh, [laughs] announcements. T-shirts. It’s coming to an end. I can’t even talk about them anymore because I’m just going to cry every time I think about them. January 1st is the last – no, December 31st is the last day that we can sell them. January 1st, we have to stop selling the MuggleCast t-shirts forever. So, make sure to purchase your own. I purchased four the other day, because I want to make sure that I stock up. It’s like Y2K. Right before the year 2000, everyone was afraid that all the technology was going to stop working, and everyone bought water and stuff just in case…

Ben: This is the same thing. You have to buy…

Andrew: They stocked up on extra food. It’s the same thing.

Ben: Yeah, you have to buy a million MuggleCast t-shirts.

Andrew: That’s what I’m saying. Exactly. Just in case they never come back, which they won’t. [laughs] Also, interesting little competition going on, on Podcast Alley right now. We beat Keith and Girl, and we’re right up…

Ben: Wooo!

Andrew: …there on top with our friends at PotterCast.

Ben: The what?

Jamie: At what, sorry? At what?

Ben: The who?

Andrew: It’s this other Harry Potter podcast…

Ben: Oh, I’ve never heard of them.

Andrew: …you guys ever hear of this?

Ben: No.

Andrew: So don’t forget to vote for us on Podcast Alley. Also, a book. We have a book now?

Ben: We have a book.

Andrew: You guys wrote a book?

Ben: Ladies and Gentlemen, MuggleNet.com’s What will happen in Harry Potter 7: Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Falls in Love and How the Adventure Finally Ends, by Ben Schoen, Emerson Spartz, Andy Gordon…

Andrew: That’s me.

Ben …Gretchen Stull, and Jamie Lawrence.

Jamie: That’s me, by the way. Just in case you were wondering

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Ben: It’s a very good book. You should go out and buy it. It’s in your local retailers now. For those of you in the Chicago area, Emerson and I will be holding an event at the Skokie, Illinois, Barnes and Noble, which is a Chicago suburb. Yeah, go out and see us; we’re going to be talking about the book. It might be a good idea to read it so you can ask us questions. You know, quiz us about it before – when we get there. Yeah, so come out and see us. It’ll be a good old time. We will post more information on the site and yeah, that’s about it. Remember you can pre-order at Alivan’s, which will help support MuggleCast, the site, everything, so go ahead and do that.

Andrew: So, Ben, as a fan of you, I know that I’m really going to want to do – get a picture with you to post on my MySpace and get your autograph. Will you be doing this at this event?

Ben: I guess. I guess I could oblige for you, Andrew.

Andrew: Awww, okay. Awesome…

Jamie: Fifty dollars you said last time, didn’t you, Ben?

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: That’s your standard charge.

Andrew: Okay. And then, also, we want to remind everyone that coming up with Episode 70, which will be the show we release on New Year’s Eve, I think, will be our MuggleCast Variety Show that is made up of your songs…

Ben: Your Song?

Andrew: Your segments – huh?

Ben: Your Song.

Andrew: Huh? Your Song, the one by Elton John

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: Going to have that as the opening

Jamie: Ben, have you ever heard that song before?

Ben: You need me to sing it for you?

Andrew: No we don’t.

Ben: No, okay.

Andrew: We don’t need that. [laughs] The show will be made up of your song segments – your segments that were submitted back a few months ago, back in February, March or April, I think it was, when we had a “Create Your Own MuggleCast Segment” contest. So, we’re going to air some of those we never aired. And I have a big announcement, to come along with this announcement.

Ben: He’s coming out, folks. He’s coming out.

[Ben and Jamie laugh]

Andrew: I, Andrew Sims – it really is coming out, in a way.

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: I, Andrew Sims…

Jamie: He’s pregnant.

Andrew: …am pregnant. I, Andrew Sims, I am starting my own Wizard Rock Band.

Ben: Yeah, you told me this the other night. I was like, “What are you up to?” And he says, “Starting my own Wizard Rock Band.”

Jamie: What’s it going to be? “Andrew and the Sims”?

Andrew: I do not know. I don’t have a name, yet, for the band. I am working on my first single right now.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: It has a good beat. It’s – I’ll give you a little preview. It’s about the podcasts that we do, and I really think it’s going to be a really big hit.

Ben: Are you singing, too?

Andrew: Ah, well, it’s more of a rap.

[Jamie and Micah laugh]

Jamie: Ummm…

Andrew: So, I’m really excited about it, and it’s going to – the single is going to make its premiere on Episode 70, our variety show. And I hope everyone enjoys it. You know, there’s bands out there like U2 and Elton John and I really think I’m right up there with them. So, we’ll see what the response is like. So, if you want to be a part of our Variety Show, please e-mail your song or segment to mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com. We’re looking for MuggleCast remixes – fun stuff like that. Try to keep it short like five minutes, or so. Or it could be shorter than that. Two minutes, whatever. So, thanks for that…

Ben: [clears throat] Make it good.


Listener Rebuttal: Nature vs. Nature


Andrew: We have a rebuttal now.

Micah: All right, the first rebuttal comes from Rivah of Cleveland, Ohio. She says:

“It was very brave of you guys to take on the age old question of ‘Nature vs. Nurture,’ as it relates to the Harry Potter. After several semesters of Philosophy and Philosophy of Religion, I still can’t make up my mind. I do, however, think that if there is something innate in our nature, it will come out. Voldemort would most definitely have been troubled – maybe even psychotic – but his circumstances propensified his evil nature, not to mention the alluring power that magic added to the situation. There are many times he could’ve turned back and stopped, but his callous disregard for life leads me to believe that, no matter what, he would turn out evil. I have to say Laura was given the short end of the stick this week, with the world being so PC it’s hard to find a court case or argument where a person’s environment is not brought up as a factor. It is hard to argue that ‘black and white’, ‘good and evil’ side of ‘Nature vs. Nurture’ argument; kudos for doing such a good job, Laura. Jamie, I think, though, just enjoys playing “Devil’s Advocate”…”

Jamie: I do, very much.

[Eric laughs]

Micah: “…to any argument. Thank goodness he has the intellect and intelligence…”

Jamie: Wow.

Micah: “…not to mention an amazing accent that are extremely persuasive. Who knew listening to MuggleCast could be entertaining and intellectually stimulating…”

Jamie: Awww.

Micah: “…at the same time?”

[Eric laughs]

Ben: Well, you see, here’s the thing, guys: Jamie, actually, I don’t think – you really weren’t playing Devil’s Advocate, were you?

Jamie: Well, no. I was playing Devil’s – I didn’t believe all the stuff I was saying, but I do think that you…

[Micah and Andrew laugh]

Jamie: …can’t ignore, you know, nurture.. Oh, and adding one more thing to that, she says that the allure of magic is huge, and it’s true. For someone like him, who didn’t grow up in a magical environment – he thought he was a Muggle – the allure is even greater. I mean, if we learn magic now, we’d be drawn to it, more so than if it’s just a normal part of your life. So, that’s one more thing.

Eric: Well, guys, if…

Jamie: To the rebuttal, there.

Eric: …if we fail to be entertaining and intellectually stimulating the first 63 times…

Jamie: It’s not going to happen, yeah.

Eric: …we have in Episode 64.

[Andrew and Ben laugh]

Eric: So, that’s good news. I’m happy. So, that’s cool.

Andrew: Yeah, we got a lot of mixed feedback about that discussion last week. Some people really, really, really enjoyed it, and some people didn’t enjoy it.

Ben: Didn’t, yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: But that’s the way it goes every week, pretty much. So…

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: You know, we try to mix it up, and we can’t talk about…

Jamie: The Forbidden Forest every week.

Andrew: [adopts a funny voice] Horcruxes for the millionth…

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs] Yeah.

Ben: I think Episode 73 – 100 should be the Horcrux shows.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Jamie: The Horcrux Series.

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: Get people so sick of it…

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: …they’ll never even e-mail us about it again. [laughs] Yeah.


Order of the Phoenix Developments


Andrew: Before we get to our interview, we are going to talk about the latest Order of the Phoenix developments, because there have been a lot of them. We talked about the trailer a little bit last week, teaser poster, but at that point we didn’t really have it in a good quality version online. Then we have…

Ben: Was it Yahoo who released the high-def version?

Andrew: Yes, they did.

Ben: And so what do you guys think of it? Has anything changed for you, now that you’ve had a chance to watch the trailer a lot of times?

Jamie: No, it’s the same, it’s just in higher definition.

[Micah laughs]

Ben: No, I know this. I know this, but there – you’ll pick more up – you’ll pick up more on the subtle nuances of things in the trailer…

Andrew: Right.

Ben: …the more times you see it, which is what I’m saying.

Andrew: Like when I first saw it on YouTube. The picture was kind of dark, and you couldn’t make out most of it. But then when you see it in high-def, you see every single shot.

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.


Eric and Micah’s Take on the Trailer


Andrew: And you could see Bellatrix, which was really cool. But, Eric and Micah, you guys weren’t on the show last week. What did you guys think of the trailer?

Eric: I liked it. It was completely – it was really short. It didn’t seem like 57 seconds when I first saw it in the theatre. I…

Andrew: That’s because it was 54.

Eric: Okay. Then that…

[Ben and Andrew laugh]

Eric: Okay, that’s solved. Okay, so it’s 54 seconds.

[Ben and Andrew laugh]

Eric: It didn’t seem like that. It flew by really fast. Most of the time was spent on the fading in of the lo – sorry, the logo. So, you know, Sirius Black looks nice.

Andrew: Oh.

Eric: I was just wanted to say Sirius Black looks very nice. “Incontrovertible;” that’s a new word for Michael Gambon.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: [laughs] That’s a like a word – that is weird, when he says that…


Michael Gambon


Micah: I have to say, I have never been a fan of Michael Gambon, but he’s sort of grown on me since Goblet of Fire.

Ben: Hold on, though.

Micah: So, hopefully he does a better job.

Ben: I have a comment about him in the whole little scene where he says, [imitates Michael Gambon] “Evidence that Lord Voldemort is back is incontrovertible!” I don’t know, he just seems too hardcore for me. Like…

Jamie: But Dumbledore is hardcore.

Ben: I think Dumbledore is supposed to be about – he’s supposed to be stern, you know, but he’s not supposed to like, “Aargh!” angry-type Dumbledore. I think he’s just supposed to be more of a…

Jamie: No, he is, though. At some points he’s supposed to be angry. He’s supposed to be…

Ben: Not that angry. I think he’s…

Jamie: Of course he is! The power…

Ben: He’s supposed to be cool. He’s supposed to be cool, calm, and collected. That’s Dumbledore.

Eric: Yeah, there’s a dignified kind of “I will hurt you” type thing to Dumbledore. To clarify what I was saying earlier, it’s not when he says, “I am not weak.” Harry – there’s a scene, it’s like 26 minutes in or 26 seconds in. [laughs] Can’t remember which.

Ben: You saw a different trailer than I did. [laughs]

[Andrew laughs]

Eric: No, it’s the same trailer. Twenty-six seconds in, he’s – it’s right after Dumbledore says, “incontrovertible,” and goes to this other scene, kind of panoramic kind of shot of Harry, and he looks like he did in the second Triwizard task with a – or something. There’s something not right about the lighting of that scene, it just makes him look a little weird, like he doesn’t have any hair over his forehead, or anything. It’s kind of just a particularly weirdly dressed Harry. The rest of the trailer looks fine.


The Mysterious Frame


Andrew: Micah, what’d you think?

Micah: Overall, I liked it. I agreed with what Jamie said last week, I think, that that whole scene with Snape, either it’s going to go terribly, terribly right or terribly, terribly wrong. The shot from it, though, seemed as if they did a good job with it. But, actually, something I had a question about was I paused about 28 seconds in, and it’s right after or, actually, right before the whole scene with Harry and Snape, and it looks like Voldemort is shooting something out of his wand, and if you pause it, there’s a picture…

[Jamie and Ben laugh]

Micah: …of a woman in there. [laughs] No, it’s really weird, there’s a WB shield in the bottom right hand corner.

Andrew: Yeah.

Micah: And there’s a picture of a woman, but it’s not a real woman, and I don’t know where exactly this is being shot.

Andrew: See, I mean… Hmmm. I wish I could see this, but – I mean, most of the visual effects aren’t done yet.

Jamie: Yeah.


Why O.W.L.s vs. Dobby in the Movie?


Andrew: And like the stuff for the trailer, I’m sure they’re going to tweak more. Like, I’ve said this last week: the pendulum behind Umbridge looks terribly fake. Now here’s my thing – I thought about this earlier today. The O.W.L.s are obviously in, because of what we see in the trailer. I assume that still means they’re in. I mean, they could still cut them. Now, if something like that is in, that doesn’t seem like a very big plot that really deserves a spot in the movie, and it seems like Dobby would be a more welcomed plot.

Jamie: Addition?

Andrew: Yeah, rather than the O.W.L.s.

Ben: But the house elves are going to be much more costly.

Jamie: Well, I don’t know. It’s an expensive thing, the O.W.L.s. They’ve got to do all that stuff in front of Professor Tofty, and you have to, you know…

Ben: Right, but I doubt it’s – but it’s not as expensive. When, I think it was Newell, said at the premiere last November, which I was at. [laughs] No, I’m just kidding.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Ben: Newell said at the premiere that – what exactly did he say? He said that every time the house elves step on screen, it’s literally hundreds of thousands of dollars.

Andrew: Oh, right, yeah.

Ben: So that’s probably why. I mean, you know, they only have a $320 million budget. I mean there’s…

Jamie: Yeah, exactly. It must be tough.

Ben: They can’t…

Micah: [laughs] With Goblet of Fire, you have a whole story line there which includes, was it Winky, at the beginning? And I think they really change the whole storyline around…

Jamie: Yeah.

Micah: …just so she didn’t have to be in there.

Jamie: Oh, yeah they did.

Micah: I don’t know if adding Dobby in, really, here, would be that much of a big deal for them, whereas before, in Goblet of Fire it would cost quite a lot of money.

Ben: Wasn’t Winky, Winky was the whole reason, right?

Eric: Mhm.

Micah: Yeah, and they completely cut her out.

Ben: That’s screwed up.

Jamie: But it is expensive.

Andrew: I mean, Kreacher is definitely in it, so they’re not completely cutting out house elves.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: It’s not like they’re – you know, that department is shut down for this film. [laughs]

Eric: That was – my problem with it is, as I mentioned before, is the tie-ins. The very strict, limited tie-ins between movies that I’d like to see, such as Dobby coming back. Just because, every director’s done their own thing, the only thing that’s stayed the same is the actors, pretty much. You know? So, I want to see house elves again, because then it would kind of, I don’t know, link the films together. I don’t know if they’re supposed to be linked, but they say Harry Potter One and Harry Potter Two and Year Three in my DVD collection. So, you know?

Andrew: I…[laughs] what?

Micah: What?

Ben: Yeah, that made no sense.

Eric: The DVDs! The movies!

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: They – there’s no connection between the films. Except for the actors, everything else changes.

Ben: Well, that’s because the new director, you know?

Andrew: I mean, they do have to change – yeah.

Eric: Well, yeah.

Jamie: That’s because it’s a different film. [laughs]

Ben: Yeah, that, too.

Eric: Well, I understand, but each book has links back and forth, and they cut out all the ties to previous films. It’s like, “Okay, Chris Columbus did the Dobby thing, therefore we can never do the Dobby thing again.”

Jamie: Well, actually, if you read, sort of, Prisoner of Azkaban, it’ll say like they’ll be talking about Quidditch and Jo will say, “Quidditch is a game, you know, played by blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, with blah, blah, blah, balls,” stuff like that. And she’ll say that in the third book, but then come Book Four, Book Five, and Book Six, she won’t offer, sort of, you know, previous bits of information to refresh your memory. I think she’s just assuming that after you get that far, you’re not going to need to remember what Quidditch is and stuff like that.

Andrew: Yeah. I mean, she still makes a couple references.

Jamie: Oh, yeah, she does.

Ben: She does do some refreshing a bit, like in the early chapters especially.

Andrew: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.


HBO On Demand: Umbridge


Ben: Now, what about the HBO on Demand? That thing was pretty cool.

Andrew: That was intense.

Jamie: Yeah, that was very good.

Ben: What are your guys’ thoughts on it?

Andrew: It was – what was that, like three minutes long? It was a good three-minute look at behind-the-scenes filming, and some interviews with the actors. I really liked it. People, the fans loved it.

Jamie: Imelda Staunton’s acting, as well, it was cringe-worthy in a good way. It was, you know, exactly how Umbridge is supposed to act, I think. The sweet…

Ben: She’s not fat enough.

Jamie: No, no, you’re right. She isn’t. But the sort of sweetness and disgusting, you know, pleasure in her voice came out.

Ben: Mix.

Jamie: Yeah, it’s awfully good, basically.

Eric: Bittersweet.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: I definitely think she did a good job.


HBO On Demand: Dan’s Portrayal as a Leader


Ben: But something that kind of irked me was – it didn’t really irk me – but, to me, Dan Radcliffe, I mean, he does a good job as Harry, but he just doesn’t seem to personify what a leader is. You know what I mean?

[Eric laughs]

Ben: He doesn’t seem to, like, I couldn’t see him leading a bunch of his peers. Daniel Radcliffe, I know Harry can. But I couldn’t see Daniel Radcliffe really get into that role. I don’t know. What about you, what do you guys think?

Andrew: Are you referring to something in the HBO video?

Ben: Yeah. When he was…

Andrew: When he was teaching Neville?

Ben: They start talking about him. They start talking about him teaching. You know?

Andrew: Yeah, and there is…

Ben: I was just thinking about how they’re going to do that because he doesn’t seem like the leader type.

Eric: Are you saying he is kind of like a one-sided actor where is better at portraying the whole “everybody hates me” kind of Harry?

Ben: Yeah, yeah.

Eric: As opposed to the – yeah. I kind of see where you come up with that.

Ben: So, I just don’t know how well he is going to be able to portray the “go get ’em” Harry.

Eric: If he does it in a defiant kind of way, like as seen in the trailer where he’s like, “Voldemort is trying to get me, I must stop him.” If he portrays it kind of like in Chamber of Secrets, the trailer, when Lucius Malfoy says that thing about Harry always being around to save the day, he says, “Don’t worry. I will be.”

Ben: Kind of a lame line, but yeah. [laughs]

Eric: That kind of defiant kind of thing. [laughs] He’s kind of got that going for him. I think we just have to see more.

Ben: I don’t know. In the trailer, part of it seems sort of lame. When he says, [does Harry impression] “If Voldemort’s organizing an army, let’s fight” or whatever. [laughs]

Eric: Yeah. “Let’s fight.” That’s what I was talking about. He says, “Let’s fight” and…

Ben: Well, I don’t know. I was just thinking like, occasionally it seems like every movie, it seems, like, they give him a line that is just completely ridiculous and totally lame. Like in Goblet of Fire it was, [Harry impression] “I love magic.” You know? [laughs]

Eric: No! That was not a ridiculous line. That was a great line.

Micah: Yes it was.

Jamie: Indeed. It was atrocious.

Andrew: Wait, he says what? “I love magic?”

Micah: When he walks into the tent…

Ben: When he walks into the tent and sees how big it is.

Jamie: Atrocious.

Micah: Yeah.

Andrew: Oh, yeah. [laughs]

Ben: He says, [Harry impression] “I love magic.”

Andrew: Yeah. Do you Harry? Do you?

Jamie: How many buckets did you guys use after that?

Ben: [laughs] Yeah.

Jamie: It was atrocious.

Andrew: Yeah. But that stood out for me in this HBO special where he’s showing Neville how to cast some spell. He just seemed – it stood out because it just seemed different for him. It didn’t seem like his normal portrayal of Harry.

Jamie: But it is different, of course. Him leading is a new thing for him.

Andrew: Oh it is.

Jamie: He couldn’t believe it when they wanted him to teach them, so it’s like – and it says in the book that he is – that it was extremely weird to see people doing what he says and following his orders. So, it’s kind of good if Dan isn’t really too sure how to portray him…

Ben: I guess so.

Jamie: …because it goes into the character, which is a good thing.


HBO On Demand: Matthew Lewis as Neville


Ben: Well. Okay, is it just me or is Matt Lewis really, really good?

Jamie: He is good.

Ben: I think he fits what I’ve always seen as Neville, you know?

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: He really fits that character really well.

Andrew: He definitely pulls off the nervous Neville that is always in the books.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: Mhm.

Eric: And then some. He has to do it…

Ben: Well, especially in Goblet of Fire. Based off how he did in Goblet of Fire, I mean, most people are expecting pretty great things in Order of the Phoenix.

Andrew: Yeah, yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.


Tangent: Dan in Equus


Andrew: And back to Dan, I think he has got enough experience under his belt to change up his – how he’s portraying Harry with those scenes, the Dumbledore’s Army scenes.

Jamie: Exactly, yeah.

Ben: So, has he had his West End debut yet? The Equus?

Jamie: No, he hasn’t.

Andrew: That’s February, I think.

Ben: That’s February? Jamie, are you going to go see?

Jamie: I probably will go and see it, to be honest.

Andrew: I was telling Jamie we should have him buy a ticket…

Ben: And cover it for us.

Andrew: …and charge it to MuggleCast, and then – yeah, exactly. Do a review.

Jamie: I’ll do that. Will you pay for my hotel and spending money as well?

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Andrew: No. How much are tickets? They’re like $100 right, I think?

Jamie: For good seats, yeah.


OOTP Set Pictures: Azkaban


Andrew: We also saw a lot of set pictures this week. Azkaban Prison, I think that was probably one of the biggest ones. I was reading through the comments on MuggleNet, people not too happy about Azkaban and where it’s placed. Because some people are upset that WB is really changing things up, with Azkaban specifically, because it is on a waterfall on a cliff.

Jamie: Yeah, I noticed. The thing is…

Ben: That’s kind of strange.

Jamie: …that is the kind of thing where the movies, they have the creative license to change stuff. But it just seems so much easier to put it on a rock where it will A) still look awesome and they know they’ll please people; whereas if they put it on a waterfall they risk alienating some people and it will look awesome, but they sort of are losing by doing it, you know?

Micah: But why? Why does that bother people?

Andrew: Because it’s different from the books.

Micah: It seems like such a small thing.

Andrew: People are really hardcore about some things staying true to the books.

Micah: Well, I mean. But then going back to Goblet of Fire they completely rewrote the entire plot in order to fit it in two-and-a-half hours.

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: Yeah, and if you’re worried about…

Micah: I see something like Prisoner, like Azkaban itself being on a waterfall, I don’t see that as big of a deal.

Eric: It just lies in what people want to see is almost like the – one of the benefits of the movies is to, and movies don’t replace what your book eye is seeing, but they are a nice visual, I don’t want to say assurance, but movies are fun to watch and you get to see your favorite parts of the books on the silver screen or whatever. And that’s what I think a lot of people like. Now, the thing with rewriting Goblet of Fire. I mean, yeah, it would have been cool to see Winky, but you still got to see the tasks. The way they rewrote it was a visually pleasing film. Not just in general, but people who had seen all the stuff in their eyes, you know, in their mind’s eye while reading the books. Now, the thing with Azkaban, you want to be terrified of it. You want to imagine what it would be like languishing there for 15 or 16 years before being let out and stuff. So this whole waterfall thing is actually a big deal.

Andrew: I think they’re trying to make it look like there is no way of escaping.

Jamie: Yeah, exactly. That’s exactly what they’re trying to make.

Andrew: They’re ignoring the fans. Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: It’s just a terrible place. There’s no way you can get out.

Jamie: The problem with it is that place is actually inescapable. And if it’s on an island, then you can swim across. If you fall out of that thing onto the waterfall and you go all the way down, it looks like a damn big waterfall, you’re going to die. So, there is the problem of Sirius’ escape from there. Dogs can swim, but they can’t survive waterfall falls.

Ben: [laughs] Yeah, that’s true.

Andrew: Right.

Eric: So, there’s no spell that could allow a buffer of some kind? Like a raft?

Micah: Lassie did though.

Ben: Well, he was so weak. He probably couldn’t cast a spell.

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: Oh, I’m sure there is, but it’s still very difficult.

Ben: Something interesting about – you know, like this movie is not going to be a movie for the purists. Because think about it logically.

Jamie: No, it’s not.

Ben: Movie 1, a 308 page book, is put into a two-and-a-half hour movie. Movie 4, a 735 page book, is put into a two-and-a-half hour movie. An 870 page book, they’re going to put it into a two-and-a half-hour movie. So you realize that they are just going to have to keep cutting stuff.

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

Ben: So, if that upsets you, don’t even bother seeing the movie.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Because you’re going to walk out and be absolutely infuriated.

Andrew: He…

Micah: But Andrew, didn’t you say that Azkaban…

Andrew: What?

Micah: …Was just in the paper? Isn’t it just shown in the paper?

Andrew: Well, they have a newspaper that that picture appears in. I don’t know for sure if it
actually appears in the film or not.

Jamie: They might just do a fly-by.

Andrew: Yeah, I mean, the set, not the set, the fly-by – Azkaban itself was actually designed by Stewart Craig, so, I mean, they’ve got to use it for something worthy of his time.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: But, anyway, I mean, it would just seem like a waste if they just use it on a newspaper cover.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Because that’s where it was.


OOTP Set Photos: Harry’s Hand


Andrew: Here’s another thing that’s been getting fans; a picture got out of Dan’s, well, on Harry’s hand, where he’s inscribing “I will not break rules.”

Jamie: Oh, oh, oh.

Micah: Was that a gorilla?

[Andrew, Eric and Micah laugh]

Andrew: Yeah, is there a gorilla in here?

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: When in the books it says “I must not tell lies.” You know what’s up with this, Jamie?

Jamie: Well, I was thinking about this, actually, and there’s a huge difference between, “I must not break the rules” and “I must not tell lies.” Because, obviously, if it says, “I must not tell lies,” it’s like a double lie because he’s lying that he’s told lies. You know? And also, it just sort of shows, it sort of, has a sort of Matilda-esque type thing in that it shows that adults are always right if he puts “I must not tell lies” that because he’s a child, he’s automatically wrong. And throughout the books there’s always been this whole “age is foolish if it underestimates youth” and that kind of thing. So, saying “I must not break the rules” doesn’t automatically mean he’s wrong and it comes back to what we were saying last week about incorrect and correct versus wrong and right and that if he says “I must not tell lies,” then that means that he’s wrong and incorrect, but if he says “I must not break the rules” then he’s only incorrect in so far that he’s broken the rules of the adults which aren’t automatically right, they’re just rules that have been put up by them.

Andrew: But, you really think that’s why they changed…

Jamie: Oh, completely. Absolutely. Yeah, yeah. I really do think so.

Andrew: It just seems like such an easy thing to stay true to the books, but, then again, that is an interesting explanation.

Jamie: But, the movies are completely different to the books in that the books, you know, it’s Jo’s creative license and even though her editors can tell her, “Don’t put this in because I really don’t think you should. It’s a bad idea,” Warner Brothers has – I don’t want to say a bigger audience, but a more widespread audience and if one parent talks to another parent and says, “Don’t take your child here because it does something wrong,” then like that. So, they have to stay extremely politically correct and having “I must not tell lies” is that kind of thing and it’s easier for them to change it just to make sure then to stay true to the books. And also, talking about Azkaban, you know, they aren’t supremely concerned if they don’t stay completely true to the books so I think this is just one of those things where they’ve been advised to do it. So, you know?

Andrew: That is a very interesting take on that.

Jamie: Well, thank you.

Ben: I have a question. What do you guys think – like you know how, Jamie you were talking about like the editing stuff – like JK Rowling’s creative license?

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: Do you think if the – like her editors come back to her and they say, “We don’t think you should put this in.” Right? Do you think she has the final say since she’s been doing this so long?

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: I think she has – she does but she’s not stupid and people know the market better than she does. She knows Harry Potter the best, but people know the children’s market and what people accept and won’t accept more than her. So, if somebody says, “You really cannot put this in, don’t do it,” I bet she listens more than we’d think.

Micah: The one thing I was going to say about the hands though, I think the fans’ biggest concern was one of the underlying themes of Order of the Phoenix was that nobody believed what Harry had to say and so the whole “I will not tell lies” had a bigger implication for the storyline than just writing on his hand “I will not break the rules.”

Jamie: That is very true, yeah.

Eric: But that’s also, I guess the expense of making a movie from a book. They have to cut some of the inner underlying themes and “I must not tell lies” might sound cool, but I don’t think, given the movie, given the scenes in the movie which we haven’t seen yet, I don’t think that it would be able to be conveyed as meaning the same thing. “I must not tell lies” is obviously very, very heavily political, very heavily Umbridge, and very heavily under, you know, with that theme of everybody not believing Harry. “I will not break rules” is kind of the substitute line where it’s like, okay we’re making a movie, it’s much shorter, we have a lot less time to show this in-depth political, yeah, dictatorship, that’s it.

Micah: But when you think of that, I think of This Simpsons and Bart Simpson writing on the board “I will not break the rules” at the beginning of every show.

Eric: Yeah, yeah. And sometimes it changes. That’s very funny.


OOTP Set Photos: Grawp


Andrew: Yeah. So, Grawp. Ben, what do you think of Grawp?

Ben: I think he looks pretty cool. I mean, we haven’t heard him speak or anything – or, try to speak, but I don’t know. I think it will be alright. I don’t have any like special comments on it, like anything that really makes me mad or anything.

Andrew: I think they did a good job making him – putting him into the movie – like, visually, how he looks.

Eric: There is a storyboard image right here of Grawp in comparison in size to Harry and Hagrid…

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: And I think that’s actually quite cool. It will be interesting how they fit him into the forest.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah.

Eric: I mean, not that the forest is small, I mean, by any purposes, it’s not. But, it will just be really interesting, especially because he’s like, I don’t know, his feet are huge and I don’t know. It will be cool. It will be fun to see. Then there’s also this kind of, I don’t want to say it’s wax because it’s not, some of the material just like model. Is that an actual statue of Grawp here that we’re looking at?

Andrew: It’s a model, yeah. I mean…

Eric: Kind of like, yeah…

Andrew: I was kind of wondering what they were going to do with it, because…

Eric: Well, I think…

Andrew: He’s going to be computer-animated anyways, so…

Micah: EBay.

Eric: Well, a lot of… [laughs] EBay, yeah. Besides EBay or charities, they usually build statue models to get motion-capture animation like they have to build a full scale model so that they can actually then scan it three-dimensionally into the computer.

Andrew: Oh, right, right, right.

Eric: So, they have to do that. But I was going to say – and I think I did say over top of what Ben was going to say that – he looks like the Hulk with a beer belly in this particular statue.

Andrew: Good point.

Micah: Do we actually see a scene in HBO with Hagrid pretending to talk to him?

Andrew: Yeah, there was one shot of Hagrid, yeah. In the forest, yeah.

Micah: But there wasn’t any image of Grawp there?

Andrew: No, I don’t think so, yeah.


HBO On Demand: Evanna Lynch as Luna


Andrew: Jumping back to the HBO special, we got our first look at Evanna performing. It was two words, but she goes [in a high-pitched voice] “They’re Thestrals!” I can’t even do it, her voice is so high. It’s “They’re Thestrals!”

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: What do you…

Micah: Perhaps I should’ve used my chipmunk voice. [laughs]

Andrew: What do you guys think of Evanna? And keep in mind, keep it good, because she listens to the show.

Eric: I think it’s good. I think we obviously need to see a lot more of her, but everybody who was on the set – everybody who’s seen her – said she is Luna. So, I think I’m going to continue believing them. A lot of people saw this and they’re giving up all hope, and saying “That’s not my Luna at all!” I think some of the things with – even Alan Rickman as Snape and things – we had to give a little bit of allowances of our own minds, the very personal, what we see as their character, and just give into it and see it’s a little bit different but still the same character in the movies being portrayed.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: And two words. Why is everybody basing everything on Evanna on two words? I don’t think that’s fair at all. I think we need to see a lot more, and I’m interested to see a lot more.

Andrew: She actually told me that whenever we talk about her on the podcast, she actually fast forwards through it [laughs] because she can’t stand hearing about herself.

Micah: Well then, let’s continue.

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: Let’s continue that then.

Micah: Jo said she was perfect, so if Jo thinks that she’s perfect then…

Andrew: Yeah

Eric: Oh yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Micah: …that’s pretty much the final decision.

Andrew: Yep.


Interview: Order of the Phoenix Video Game


Andrew: All right, so we are going to play a special interview now that Kevin and I conducted with two producers of the Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix video game. Here it is now.

Andrew: Hi everyone. I’m now joined with Kevin.

Kevin: Hello.

Andrew: Kevin, we haven’t seen you in awhile.

Kevin: Yeah, no kidding.

Andrew: It’s good to hear from you again, and we’re here with two very special people from EA.
Their names are Justin and Matt. Hey guys.

Justin and Matt: Hi!

Andrew: You guys work on the Order of the Phoenix video game at Electronic Arts over in London, correct?

Justin: That’s right. We have the pleasure of working on the Harry Potter front, and we have done since Goblet of Fire.

Matt: Yeah, and then for me I work on the platform since Prisoner of Azkaban.

Justin: And I worked on the GPA Prisoner of Azkaban title.

Matt: Yeah, well, I worked on Quidditch!

[Everyone laughs]

Justin: Well, so did I!

Andrew: Everyone’s impressed. Everyone’s impressed. [laughs]

[Justin and Matt laugh]

Matt: Yeah, we work on Harry Potter which is obviously fantastic.

Andrew: Yeah. Can you tell us about your jobs at EA, what exactly you guys do with the games?

Justin: Sure, yeah. I’m producer on the title, and that kind of means what I try and do is find out what people want from the game, and find out from fans like yourselves, find out from the kids buying the game, what it is they are after, and try and make sure the designs, make sure the audio and the art and everything really fits what people are after.

Matt: My role on the project is primarily to put the design together and work on, you know, what it is you actually do within the game and work on making sure we have all the Harry Potter fiction in there and really deliver that Harry Potter experience that I as a fan want to get to, and I know you guys do.

Andrew: Yes.

Kevin: Now how long have you guys been working at EA?

Justin: I’ve been working at EA probably since 2000, so nearly six or so years. And I’ve been a producer practically all that time.

Matt: Yeah, I’ve been here – my goodness – seven-and-a-half years and most of that time I’ve been a game director, which is essentially running the design for the projects.

Andrew: Okay. Now, Matt, was it you that was on the Order of the Phoenix set in late September?

Matt: It was, it was.

Andrew: Next question I got for you [laughs] well, I know your answer, which is: You guys big fans of the books and movies? I know you are.

Justin: Yeah, absolutely. I don’t think we could do this job if we weren’t. I mean, we have to live the fiction day-by-day, year-on-year. I mean Matt absolutely tralls the fiction day-by-day. I think he’s seen the movies virtually every day this year.

Andrew: Uh huh.

[Everyone laughs]

Justin: The people on the scene, including the artists come to me and ask me all sorts of obscure questions. Like, I’ve been trying to build the broom cupboard that Harry drags Crabbe and Goyle into in Chamber of Secrets and I did find which door it is in the Entrance Hall that the broom cupboard is in.

[Andrew and Kevin laugh]

Justin: Yeah, I watch rather too much.

Andrew: Yeah, well, it’s great that there’s dedicated fans of the books and the movies working on this game. I know the fans really appreciate that.

Justin: Absolutely, with this, and I think the directions for this game, above all the others we’ve done, is really, really to get back to the book and the movies have been just as pure to them as possible. I know Matt for sure has been through every member of the DA to find their whole back stories, whether there’s three lines written about them in the book, or whether there’s 25, or whole books written about them. It’s just finding anything we can about these guys.

Andrew: Right.

Matt: Trying to make game play out of that rather then and invent something first, then kind of fit the fiction around it. We’re starting with the fiction first and then inventing game play around that.

Andrew: Mhm. I see. Yeah, cool.

Justin: It completely is an approach. I mean, it’s a lot more detail and it does require the art guys, our designers and spending loads of time on the books and movies to get the information we need.

Andrew: Right.

Justin: Just so we can get the things that you guys will suddenly spot in the game as you’re going through and go “Oh, they put that in.”

Andrew: Yeah.

Justin: That’s what we want to get. We want to get that kind of response this year.

Andrew: Yeah.

Matt: Absolutely. That direction for the design theme is been very much, you know? This year we’re not building a game and putting “Harry Potter” on it. It’s about taking Harry Potter and getting a game from it.

Andrew: Mhm.

Matt: Fiction 100% leads the game.

Andrew: All right.

Kevin: That’s great.

Andrew: We saw a preview of the video game on the set back in late September, and it really – the things you guys have done with the game in comparison to other ones, a big step forward.

Justin: You ought to see it, man. You ought to see the Grand Staircase.

Andrew: [laughs] Ah, I can imagine. Well, speaking of…

Justin: Yeah, and, first of all, thanks very much for all the feedback. That’s fantastic because I was so nervous standing in front of the fans.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs]

Justin: Like “Oh my God, what are these guys going to think?”

[Andrew and Kevin laugh]

Justin: You guys are wonderful again, so great feedback on that day and we’ve been getting more as we’ve gone on. But honestly, the new version…

[Andrew and Kevin laugh]

Justin: One of your questions leads into what we’re most proud of. So many things this time around, and the Grand Staircase went in a few days ago and – oh my goodness.

Andrew: Oh wow!

Matt: I hope you’re going to be blown away by it.

Andrew: Yeah, I know we will. Now, a few of our listeners had called in a few weeks ago with some questions for you guys, and we have them ready for you guys now.

Matt: Cool.

Andrew: So, Kevin?

Kevin: Sure. I am just going to read the first question for you guys. How does the release of the Wii-mote, as they are calling it, going to affect the game play aspects of the game, and how are these new Wii specific features going to impact the other consoles?

Justin: So, what we’ve done this year actually, we’ve kind of pre-empted the Wii on all platforms. We’ve gone for a new way of casting and selecting magic this year. I’m not going to talk too much about it in detail, but suffice it to say we don’t want this kind of menu driven selection or the context sensitive selection of Goblet of Fire that we had. We’re really looking to have the player cast magic, and obviously with the Wii we’ve got a real opportunity with the Wii-mote because it can behave just like a wand. So, we really want to pursue putting you, and your game character, with this wand in your hand to be able to cast magic that way. So the game will, you know, be viewed from a different perspective and it will play slightly differently based on the fact that you will be able to use your Wii-mote as a wand. And I say, I’m not going to go into too many details now because we’re still refining those details, but definitely very excited about doing Harry Potter on Wii.

Andrew: Cool. Now, next question we have here: What part of any of the Harry Potter games are you guys, the designers, most proud of?

Matt: I think the way we’ve dealt with this project; the way we’re sort of taking it from the fan’s perspective and working with the fiction first, and putting the design in second is, you know, probably the biggest single thing we could choose as designers to be proud of, because it’s incredibly hard to do it that way round. I mean, looking at something like the Invisibility Cloak, you can imagine, you know, Invisibility Cloak absolutely, as a fan, I want to have a go in the Invisibility Cloak. It’s so awesome!

[Andrew laughs]

Matt: But as a designer, you know, we can put the ability to wander around the castle and have people not be able to see them. It presents a whole bunch of new challenges, so I think the approach is something I’m hugely proud of, but then there’s so many things. I mean, the Gryffindor common room, which you guys saw, I’m so proud of that, because it’s one of the things, that you know, the team worked so hard to get done and taking something like the film set and transforming it into a game, it requires a lot of thought process and we have to approach it quite differently than you would approach a standard game. I think what we’re doing with this year and taking the fiction and how we’re translating that is probably one of the things that I’m most proud of.

Justin: Definitely. We started from, you know, a) the fiction but b) the blue prints of the castle. We’ve been working quite hard with the movie people to try and get the, you know, “de facto Hogwarts” and in the past we’ve designed Hogwarts almost around game play. You know? How our camera system works, how our AI system works, this one was actually built from blueprints. You know, like Matt said, it presents so many design challenges. So, to make a fun game building from a real world set, that’s quite a challenge, and I really think we’ve kind of pulled it off. And I think also, you know, bringing that to life with magic, I mean you guys said you’d seen the demo; there’s sort of various discoverable items, enchanted items in the world that you can discover with magic.

Andrew: Yeah.

Justin: Just having those things in, and the wizard games, and the fictional precedence for all the missions we’re putting in, we’re really trying to bring Hogwarts to life. It’s really what we’re excited about and it’s so different to the games you’ve seen before.

Andrew: Cool.

Kevin: Okay. Now, going back a little to the Wii, how many different console versions will there be, and what are going to be the slight differences between each?

Justin: So, what we’ve done this year…we’ve kind of got a PS2. We’ve got a PC. We’ve got X-Box 360. We’ve got a PS3. We got PSP, GBA, and NDS, sort of Nintendo DS. And what we’ve tried to do is, kind of, take the broad design, the story, the narratives, but give each of those platforms something slightly unique. We’re calling it, perhaps a little bit of a twist for each of those platforms, because what we realized is each of those platforms are in the hands of different people. You know, people playing PSP aren’t necessarily people playing NDS, and so forth.

Andrew: Right.

Matt: So, what we’ve tried to do is kind of skew the game play, just a little bit, so that those people playing those consoles get something that’s designed for that console. So, for the NDS, for example, it’s got the style of – we’re maximizing the two screens, all the game play centered around interactions through the styles of your wand, in this case. But again, the game play might be a bit more puzzle oriented for the Wii, the DS, because those kind of people prefer, you know, puzzle oriented gaming and sorts of games that are coming out in the DS are more in that fashion. Whereas you might go with the PSP, it’s a bit more hardcore for all the boys. It might be something slightly different. And again with the Wii-mote and the Wii, it’s all about the controller. We’re trying to make it so that you’re casting spells, so you feel that you’re really, kind of, using the wand with the Wii-mote. So, we’re just trying to skew them individually, but the core game stays the same in terms of telling the same story, you know, doing the same things. It’s still all about Hogwarts and the enchanted Hogwarts, but we’re just trying to do one or two little things on each platform that’s unique.

Andrew: Right. I was actually using a Wii up in New York City last week, and I was playing a tennis game and all I could think about when I was playing that was how cool it’s going to be to use that Wii-mote with a – as a wand. So…

Justin: Yeah. We saw it, as well, and I’ve played the same tennis game and, you know, as soon as you pick it up you’re like, “Oh my god!” That was awesome.

Andrew: Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew and Kevin laugh]

Justin: This controller, you know, is like Nintendo sort of went, “How would we make the ultimate Harry Potter game? We put a wand in your hand!”

Andrew: Exactly. [laughs]

Kevin: Yeah.

Justin: [laughs] It’s fantastic. I was blown away by it.

Andrew: Yeah.

Justin: It’s a great console.


Interview: Order of the Phoenix Video Game (continued)


Andrew: It’s really cool. Could you give us a brief description about what we can expect from Order of the Phoenix? For example: is it a free roamer like Sorcerer’s Stone, Chamber of Secrets, and Prisoner of Azkaban, or will it have defined levels, and how are the objectives laid out, and also, should we expect any new game play elements that weren’t previously available in other games?

Matt: I would say that this game is probably taking the best bits of the games you mentioned, but it’s more open if anything.

Kevin: Oh.

Matt: So, we kind of have an open, roamable Hogwarts, but we’re filling it with side quests, portrait quests, mini-games, enchanted items for you to discover, as well as the narrative mission. I mean, what we’ve really learned is people have been really wanting Hogwarts. It’s the biggest source of feedback we’ve had for the last couple of years. You know, they really want to explore Hogwarts and sort of see the characters they know and love and kind of do the things that the guys do in the books and in the films. So, we’ve put that really at the center of what we’re trying to do this year. And part of that is magic. We’ve kind of done spell casting in the past, but what we’re trying to do is really bring the world to life with magic. We’ve been watching the films and sort of looking at things like, when you see the chairs stack themselves in the Leaky Cauldron. You know, that’s magic in the Harry Potter world; it’s not necessarily big kind of spell casting. So, for us, I guess the difference this year is we’ve got this open-roaming Hogwarts that you can either choose to do the narrative missions – and even with that there’s probably several narrative missions open at any one time, particularly when you’re sort of trying to recruit the DA and you’re exploring Hogwarts, but we’ve also given you side missions you can pick up, doing stuff for the portraits and the ghosts, really bringing those kind of lively elements in. And then there’s this discovery element. You can go around Hogwarts and you can find all the little enchanted items that you can interact with, with your magic.

Justin: Yeah. I mean, it’s really – this time around, we’ve kept the sort of big moments from fiction, and with things like Grimmauld Place will be there for you to go in, meet Sirius and spend some time with him, and we’ll have the Ministry of Magic at the end, and of course, there’s the whole set of events in Hogwarts with Umbridge, and we really want to sort of…

Andrew: Awesome.

Justin: …make sure that that’s – all fiction is covered in that, but we want to go beyond that, as well. So, we’ve really got to expand Hogwarts out a lot more. And so I mean, we showed you guys the common room and in there we have things like the snitch, which is from one of the references in the book with Harry when he gets so angry after Umbridge has banned him from Quidditch that he goes up there and he realizes he’s still got the snitch in his hand and he’s sulking around the common room with Crookshanks trying to grab it. We’ve tried to grab all of that and also put that in there for you to discover, so going around Hogwarts you’ve kind of got the main narrative game, but you’ve got all of this extra stuff in there, which is all about finding bits of the fiction; talking to the portraits, seeing what they know and, you know, you might come across McGonagall shouting at Umbridge in a corridor and hopefully, as fans, we can all go, “Oh, man, I remember that bit! That’s so awesome! And now I’ve experienced that myself!”

Andrew: Right. [laughs]

Justin: So, it really is sort of about making that Hogwarts experience really, really rich. I mean, I think you’ll be able to spend as much time, if not more time just walking around Hogwarts trying to find everything as you do just going down the main mission path, which is quite huge, as well, because we’ve got all of the DA members in there and then you’ve got to spend time trying to undermine Umbridge. So, with a couple of extra characters in there to play, you get a moment with Fred and George, who rock. [laughs]

Andrew: Oh, cool! [laughs]

Justin: Very cool, very cool. [laughs] I’m sorry, I couldn’t help myself. Fred and George are awesome!

[Kevin laughs]

Andrew: You know what? I can see that big smile of yours from across this Atlantic Ocean. I can picture it in my head.

[Everyone laughs]

Justin: I must admit, I keep seeing some of the stuff coming through, and we’ve just been working on the character models for Fred and George and I’m so excited! I can’t wait!

Andrew: [laugh] Cool.

[Kevin laughs]

Justin: So, I’ve been controlling these guys and wandering around with them. Obviously, everybody’s got favorite characters, and we’re trying to put loads of them in there, so we’re trying to do almost all the DA and we’ve covered a lot of the extra characters and you get your moment with Sirius – awesome.

Andrew: Oh, cool.

Justin: So, I’m very excited about it. The game should be much more open and, as fans, we should be able to spend as much time just – if not directed time, if I want to go off and just spend time looking around the castle and finding all the students, having a game of wizard chess with people, I’ll be able to do that. So…

Matt: And join in.

Justin: And join in. Yeah, yeah. I mean, you get to play wizard chess. So…

Andrew: Oh, wow.

Justin: …and gobstones and wizardsnap, so we’ve got all of these things in there and these little tournaments and things to find out, and hopefully all these little things that are touched on in the fiction, we get to expand out and, as fans get to experience that.

Matt: There’s classes, as well. We forgot to mention the classes! You can go in and do classes. You can make your own potions, and go to Charms and Transfiguration…

Andrew: Wow.

Matt: …and Herbology.

Kevin: Well…

Andrew: That’s really amazing.

Kevin: Yeah, I have to say, I’m pretty glad to find out that it’s a free-roaming game because we must have gotten that question about 100 times.

[Justin and Matt laugh]

Kevin: You don’t understand how many voicemails asked that specific question.

[Andrew laughs]

Matt: It’s funny because, I mean, so many kids are playing open-world games now. It’s just – you have to do that.

Andrew: Yeah.

Matt: It’s what people expect, so it would be silly not to. And I think Hogwarts lends itself to being open. It’s such a great world. We’d love to build more. We’re just sort of [laughs] limited into what we can build, and I think we’re doing Hogwarts a great degree of justice. It’s a real focus just on it.

Andrew: Cool.

Kevin: Yeah, that’s cool. Now, is there going to be anything in the games concerning Occlumency?

Matt: Oh, of course there is!

[Everyone laughs]

Matt: It’s just fantastic. The electricity between Harry and Snape is just – you know, I’ve read all that stuff and my heart’s in my mouth all the time.

[Andrew laughs]

Matt: But, yes, Occlumency is going to be in there, and you’re going to be able to go back to it a number of times, like many of the other lessons. And so, yeah, Occlumency’s definitely going to be part of the experience, and all that, obviously, is kind of an abstract concept, so we’re spending a little bit of time at the moment experimenting with various ways Occlumency could be done.

Andrew: Cool. Next question we have here: Have you guys ever considered making an online version of any of the Harry Potter games or possibly any in the future?

Justin: I think we’ve considered making lots of games. [laughs] Ultimately, we’d love to make more than we do, but…

Andrew: Uh huh.

Justin: …the movie games are taking up all our time and effort right now and we’ve still got two more after this one to go, so…

Andrew: Right.

Justin: …I think we’ll be making movie games for a little while yet. So, yes, we’d love to. I’m sure we’ve had the ideas, but we’re not doing it right now.

Andrew: Okay.

Kevin: Okay. Our next question is: Will Jim Dale be narrating the game?

Justin: We don’t actually have a narrator this year. One of the things we’ve really, really, really tried to do from the outset of this game, is design it so that the implementation of the stories is integral to the game play. And we want you to have this kind of seamless presentation of
the game that’s immersing into the fiction from the minute you sort of start the game to the final credits, really. And so, all the story is done through characters or through in game characters. It’s not really that we come up against these narrative cut scenes once in a while that try to fill in the story. We’re hoping to tell the story throughout your character and interactions throughout Hogwarts, and just throughout the game from start to finish. So, we’re not using any narrators this year.

Andrew: Okay.

Justin: For the story.

Andrew: Go ahead, Kevin.

Kevin: Okay, the next question: Are you going to be – let me check, one second. Are you going to be put… I’m trying to read this question off this thing. [laughs] Okay, are you going to be putting anything into the game that has been edited out of the movie?

Justin: Ummm, well…

Kevin: Such as things…

Justin: Not specifically what has been left out of the movie, but obviously the movie can only cover a certain amount of the actual book and the story, so we’re picking up some aspects of that and we’re spending a lot of time trying to take the text and find ways of putting it into the game. So, we’ve got you going and finding all the DA members, and we’ve gone through all the texts and found all these little details about them and tried to make missions from them, so you’re doing something that’s relevant to the fiction with everybody. So, we’re not just going to make something up and have you do that. It’s going to be taking something from the fiction, something that we’ve found, we all know…

Andrew: Mhm.

Kevin: Mhm.

Justin: …and making you be a part of that. So, hopefully we’re going to be able to bring a lot more of the fiction into the video game experience, sort of expand on it as you get to play it. And so I’m expecting there’s going to be various things that you’re only going to be able to solve if you’re a real hardcore fan. I’m looking forward to seeing what everybody makes of it.

Andrew: Okay, cool.

Kevin: Cool.

Andrew: And will there be any connectivity to any other Nintendo video game systems? The WII version could possibly be paired up with the DS, like there was for Chamber of Secrets?

Justin: Actually, the only thing more I can say, is that we actually haven’t got any plans to support this currently.

Andrew: Okay.

Justin: We’ve kind of done this sort of thing in the past, but we’re not planning to do it this year, unfortunately. I think the Wii will stand alone and I think the DS will
stand alone as really good games in their own right, but we’re not planning any connectivity.

Andrew: Okay.

Kevin: Okay.

Justin: Sorry about that. [laughs]

Andrew: It’s fine. [laughs]

Kevin: Yeah, it is fine. Now, this is a pretty important question: What is the game going to be rated and why?

Lisa: Well, I guess that’s where I come in. [laughs]

[Kevin laughs]

Andrew: Let’s introduce you, Lisa.

Lisa: Thanks.

Andrew: Lisa, what is your exact title at Electronic Arts?

Lisa: I’m Marketing Manager for Harry Potter.

Andrew: Okay.

Lisa: So, I work very closely with Justin and Matt and to make sure we send out all the right messages out to all the right people. And so, in answer to your question about the ratings; we’re not entirely sure what the rating is going to be yet. The last product, Goblet of Fire, was the highest rating that we’ve done to date. And the other thing is that the films are getting darker and, obviously, the games are following suit. So, we’re expecting to have the same ESRB in the US, Peggy in Europe, and the USK and Germany, so it’s safe to say it’s the same as the Goblet of Fire, but it is yet to be confirmed.

Kevin: Okay.

Justin: That was an E10 in ESRB, Peggy was 7+ and USK and Germany was 12+.

Andrew: Okay.

Kevin: Okay, that’s good.

Andrew: Well, Lisa, Justin, and Matt, that concludes all of our questions from our listeners. It definitely looks like an excellent Harry Potter video game and we’re looking forward to it. Are you guys allowed to talk about release date? Do you have one yet?

Lisa: We can, actually. Yes, because I think by the time this is broadcast, actually…

Andrew: Yeah.

Lisa: …we’re going to have made an announcement.

Andrew: Okay.

Kevin: Okay.

Lisa: So, the plan at the moment is that – the plan is, is that we’ll be releasing the game on the same day as the movie release…

Kevin: Oh, that’s cool.

Lisa: …in America and in the UK. And then what we’re going to do is do a stack of the release across all the other countries, as well, so we’ll make sure that the game is in the shops the same day as the movie comes out.

Andrew: Cool. So, after we all see the movie, we can run out and buy the video games and then relive the whole thing again.

Justin: [laughs] We hope so.

Andrew: Yeah.

[Everyone laughs]

Justin: I mean I think Matt and I would really like to thank you guys and certainly all the fans that have been asking the questions and feeding back, and I think we’ve found it really invaluable. And the more sort of feedback we get, the better. It really helps us work out whether we’re making the right game and we’re putting the right things in. As you can appreciate, we’ve got only so much time and only so many people working on the game, and we have to make some decisions some time where things don’t go in or they do go in. If we’ve got some feedback of people telling us something’s really, really important, we can make better decisions about what goes in the game and hopefully please people and make the game that they want. So really, definitely thanks for you and any continuing feedback you give us.

Andrew: Okay, well, no problem. And I know I’ll be purchasing the Wii copy of the video game when it comes out, so I’m definitely looking forward to using the Wii-mode as a wand. [laughs]

Justin: I can’t wait.

[Everyone laughs]

Kevin: I think everyone is.

Andrew: Yeah. Okay.

Justin: Thank you so much, guys. Really.

Lisa: Thank you so much.

Kevin: Yeah, thanks.

Andrew: So, once again, the video game will be in stores on July 13th. Eric, I know you’re a big video game player.

Eric: Yeah.

Eric: Yeah, I’ll do a review on it like I did on Goblet of Fire video game, if you want.

Andrew: Oh, excellent.

Eric: I think it’s cool, though, that we’ve had the early teens, I think it was, or the late teens, we got our first sneak peak of Goblet of Fire. You know, the first trailer, the first pictures, the first everything, and then we were going into it and introducing it and talking about it. We’re doing the same thing now with Order of the Phoenix. I think that’s great. I think that’s really cool how we got to do this for two movies so far.

Andrew: Yeah, good point.

Eric: On this show.


Dumbledore/Norris Facts


Andrew: Well, we’ve been around for over a year now. We’re getting old. We have some Dumbledore/Norris facts, now. We haven’t had these in a while, and I know people have been really looking forward to these, Jamie.

Jamie: Well, I’ve got a special list of them this week, since it’s been so long.

Andrew: Oh, oh awesome.

Jamie: Now, there are a couple that have been ripped straight off Chuck Norris, and a couple that haven’t, so here goes a couple: When Dumbledore jumps into water, he doesn’t get wet, the water gets “Dumbledored.”

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Jamie: Dumbledore maintains that his only weakness is giant trolls with several large clubs, but this is, in fact, a lie designed to lure more giant trolls to Dumbledore.

[Eric laughs]

Jamie: Dumbledore destroyed the periodic table because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Andrew: Ohhh! [laughs]

[Eric laughs]

Micah: Ohhh!

Jamie: The mirror of Erised is actually enchanted to show you the second deepest desire of your heart; otherwise, everyone would see Dumbledore.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Jamie: These three, these three, these three… Oh, yeah, these next three and that last one are from Mike, who sent his e-mail quite a while ago, and I just found it in my inbox, and they’re awesome, so thank you very much, Mike. Albus Dumbledore made them change the title to Head Man while he was at Hogwarts; Albus Dumbledore is no one’s boy.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Jamie: When he was young, Albus Dumbledore entered the Triwizard tournament on behalf of all three schools. Each school finished first that year, because Albus Dumbledore is second to no one, including himself. I like that one.

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: Albus Dumbledore does not speak Parseltongue; he forces snakes to speak English out of fear.

[Eric laughs]

Jamie: Thank you very much, Mike.

[Micah laughs]

Jamie: And I’ll be back with some more next week as well. Keep sending them in.

Ben: I must admit, I’m pretty impressed with those.

Jamie: Really?

Ben: Usually I’m a disser of this segment. Those are pretty good.

Jamie: Well, I’m glad you like them. Thank Mike. So, yeah, please keep sending them in, especially the original Dumbledore ones. You know, fashioned on stuff from Harry Potter.


Listener Rebuttal: Snape’s Boggart


Andrew: We have another rebuttal now from Narcissa Snape.

Jamie: Andrew, you need…

Andrew: I didn’t know she was a listener, 36, from Spinner’s End, as everyone knows. She wrote to us about Snape and the boggart. She writes:

I think it is more likely that Snape left the room as he didn’t want anyone to see what his boggart was.

Good point. Good point.

Jamie: Very good point. Interestingly, what would Snape’s boggart be? People calling him a coward? People losing faith in him? Stuff like that? People not trusting him?

Andrew: Shampoo?

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Ohhh!

Eric: Oh, okay, Moony. Okay, Prongs. Just go on making fun of the Snape.

Andrew: Ah, yeah, I don’t know. People – how can you – the boggart can morph into people making fun of him, I guess?

Jamie: Yeah, that could be it. Yeah.

Eric: Or his father.

Andrew: There’s got to be something else. That just seems like his teenage…

Eric: Probably his father, guys. His family.

Ben: Guys, guys, I have a question. What would your boggart be?

Jamie: You, Ben.

Ben: I bet. Eric, I really want to know what your boggart is.

Eric: I’m trying to think. Nothing, because I’m scared of nothing.

Jamie: [laughs] No, Dumbledore is scared of nothing.

Eric: [laughs] No, I don’t know. I’ll think about it.

Andrew: All right.

Eric: I’ll text-message you.


Listener Rebuttal: Mature Listeners


Andrew: Robin, 45, of Santa Rosa California writes in about mature listeners. Older listeners in the show, and she has a challenge for them, and she has one herself.

“Hi MuggleCasters. I’ve been listening to your podcast for over a year now, and I thought it was time I wrote you a real live fan letter, and made a challenge to a very special subset of your listeners. First, the fan part. I am 45 years old, and I have been a Harry Potter fan for years, right from the time of the first book. When I got an iPod last year, one of the first things I did was search for Harry Potter on iTunes, and up popped MuggleCast. I subscribed and have enjoyed every minute since. Now, I hate to go all “mom” on you guys, [laughs] but I just have to say that one of the things I enjoy most about the show is just listening to young people speaking articulately and enthusiastically about something they enjoy and have fun with. You do a great job, and set a great example. I have a ten-year old, and a seven-year old, both huge Harry Potter fans, of course, and I hope they turn out as well as you have.”

Eric: Awww.

Andrew: Thank you Robin.

“Now, for the challenge. I have to admit it…I have to admit I took some…”

Ohhh…

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: “I have to admit it took some courage to admit to you all that I’m forty five and I listen to MuggleCast, BUT I KNOW I’M NOT ALONE!”

In all caps.

“I’d like to challenge all your mature listeners to come out from hiding and reveal themselves. Come on, people of a certain age, I know you’re out there. Get out from under your invisibility cloaks and show yourselves. Yours in fandom. Robin.”

Eric: Awww.

Andrew: So, that’s Robin’s challenge, so I guess she wants people to write into us and say I’m a mature listener and I listen to this show.

Eric: We’ve heard from a small fraction of our audience, and that has influenced the show. What I’m saying is there’s a large portion of people who – I’ll just call them non-participants, who enjoy the show, but don’t really say anything about it. So, Robin’s challenge is just to hear from some more of these people.


Listener Rebuttal: Dumbledore’s Letters


Andrew: We do get e-mails sometimes from the more mature listeners with rebuttals and such, and of course, we appreciate it. And so that’s Robin’s challenge. E-mail us. Let us know you’re a listener. We have another rebuttal now from Melissa Wah…Wine…kah…schroer [has a difficult time pronouncing name] Way…hen…schroer.

Jamie: Wiehenstroer.

Andrew: I can’t do it. I’m not good with my German.

Jamie: Wiehenstroer.

Andrew: Wiehenstroer?

Jamie: Wiehenstroer, I think.

Andrew: Fifteen, of Syracuse, New York.

“Hi, MuggleCasters. I was rereading Book 6 when I noticed how Dumbledore always used a different person to give Harry a note about their Voldemort meetings. First was Jack Sloper, then Ginny, then Hermione, Luna, and lastly, Jimmy Peakes. I was just wondering why Dumbledore didn’t send Harry these notes directly and what, if any, significance this has?”

Ummm…

Jamie: Isn’t it just because he trusts people and he doesn’t think about these things because he thinks, he sees someone walking by and he thinks well, he can give it to Harry, since, you know?

Eric: And that’s a good answer. [Laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, he’s sort of trying to avoid them anyway. So…

Jamie: Yeah. Exactly. Yeah, especially, yeah.

Eric: So that’s why he didn’t give them in person, because if Dumbledore had been seen with Harry, you know, but…

Andrew: Anything to add to this, Micah?

Micah: No. I think that you guys pretty much covered it in saying that he probably just didn’t want the same person carrying it to Harry all the time, like…

Jamie: It gets suspicious, yeah.

Micah: He didn’t want anybody seen directly…

Jamie: Favoritism and stuff.

Micah: Yeah. Maybe there’s somebody there he doesn’t trust.

Andrew: Jamie, you had success this past week.


Listener Rebuttal: Structural Architects


Jamie: I did, yeah. I asked in 64 about structural architects, and somebody sent in this rebuttal. This is from Joanne, 36, from San Francisco, California. She says,

“Jamie, you said in Episode 64 that the cast would have to ‘ask a structural architect – we’ve got plenty of those as listeners’ when discussing the columns in the Room of Requirement. I sensed sarcasm and disbelief in your end statement, so let me reassure you that you have at least one listener who is a structural engineer. I don’t know what a structural architect is. I’m assuming that’s a UK term. Maybe that’s like a structural…”

Sorry.

“Maybe that’s like an architectural engineer over here. So, the technical answer to the question ‘What’s holding the ceiling up in the Room of Requirement?’ is this: it’s magic. Actually, when I saw the DA group photo in the Room of Requirement, I thought those weird hanging column things were ventilation, especially since the group is standing on a giant grate. It looks like the room is set up for some serious high-volume air exchange. I love the show! Joanne.”

Well, perhaps that’s like wind stuff to create for the Expelliarmus spell. But, I think she’s saying that the ceiling – that ceiling would fall down if it was a real ceiling, so it must be real magic. So, thank you, Joanne, for writing in.

Andrew: The grates are – lighting comes out of those.

Jamie: Oh, okay.

Andrew: It’s for lighting.

Jamie: But the next week’s challenge is: if you’re an astronaut, can you write in?

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Yeah NASA.

[Eric and Micah laughs]

Jamie: I can see it next week – from, Neil Armstrong, age, however old he is…

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: …from the moon. Thank you, Joanne, for that.


Andrew’s Listener Challenge Update


Andrew: I have a McDonald’s update now. We’ve been getting lots of submissions. You have until the end of the month to send in your Listener Challenge entries. Once again, you take a photo of yourself and a little promotional sign for MuggleCast, whether it’s in McDonalds, or Subway, or any place out in public to help spread the word. Send those in to mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com, and put in the subject line, please, “Listener Challenge” so it’s easy for me to find all these, and then we’ll post them, I guess in early December. And the contest winner will be winning a t-shirt, and a copy of the new MuggleNet book. Can we do that, Ben?

Ben: Yes. We can do that.


British Joke of the Day


Andrew: Jamie, you want to wrap things up today with a little – with a British Joke of the Day?

Jamie: Yes. Somebody sent this in. I’m sorry, I accidentally got rid of the email, so I can’t remember who it’s from. But…

Andrew: [laughs] We’re all…

Jamie: [laughs] Yeah, I know. We’re so useful. Okay. “A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird’s mouth was rude, obnoxious, and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird’s attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music, and anything else he could think of to clean up the bird’s vocab. Finally, John was extremely fed up, and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot. The parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird, and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes, the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed, then suddenly, there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that he’d hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John’s outstretched arms and said, ‘I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’m sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions, and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior.’ John was stunned at the change in the bird’s attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued, ‘May I ask what the turkey did?'”

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: That’s my favorite joke!

Micah: That was good.

Jamie: I’m glad you like it.


Show Close


Andrew [Show Close with the music in the background]: If you would like to contact us, you can use the phone number 1-218-20-MAGIC (62442), in the United States. If you’re in the United Kingdom, you can dial 020-8144-0677. If you’re in Australia, you can dial 02-8003-5668. What’s the PO Box, Ben?

Ben: PO Box 223, Moundridge, KS 67107.

Andrew: You can also Skype the name MuggleCast to leave us a voicemail. And we’d like to remind everyone that next week is our voicemail show, so we’re going to have ten or 15 voicemail questions to answer. It’s just going to be – oh gosh, it’s going to be crazy. And you can also use the MuggleCast website to contact us via email or the feedback form. You could just do any of our names at staff dot mugglenet dot com, or mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com. And don’t forget to become our friend on MySpace because we love MySpace! And join our Facebook group, YouTube group, Frappr group, Last.FM group, Fanlisting Forums – it’s all there on MuggleCast.com. So that’s it! Next week – I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Eric: I’m Eric Scull.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Andrew: We’ll see everyone next week for Episode 66. Bye bye!

Ben: Bye bye.

Eric: Bye bye.

[Music ends]


Bloopers


Micah: The Guardian is currently running a competition where entrants must… [farting noise interrupts Micah] Oh, Ben, that was nasty!

———————–

Written by: Micah, Adrienne, Briana, Eloise, Jessica, Judy, Mandie, Martina, Matt, Megan, Roni, Samantha, Sarah, Shannon and Shelly

Transcript #64

MuggleCast 64 Transcript


Show Intro


Andrew: If you want to make an impact online, GoDaddy.com has what you need. Dot com names as low as $1.99, plus world class hosting, fast and easy website builders, and much more. Plus, as a MuggleCast listener enter code “Muggle” when you check out, and receive and additional ten percent on any order. Some restrictions apply, see site for details. Get your piece of the internet today at GoDaddy.com.

[Intro music]

Andrew: Because this is MuggleCast, Episode 64 for November 20, 2006: The Good Side of Voldemort.

[Music continues to play]

Andrew: I… Guys… I hate weeks like this.

Laura: Me, too.

Andrew: I… Yeah, I do not like them.

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: Nothing to talk about…

Kevin: So boring.

Andrew: …this week.

Laura: Depressing.

Andrew: See any stories that stuck out, Jamie? Ben? Laura? Kevin? Any stories stuck out?

Jamie: No.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: I mean, I guess there’s the birthday of MuggleNet Fan Fiction.

Laura: Yeah that’s nice.

Kevin: Oh, yeah that’s pretty cool.

Andrew: I guess that’s a big one.

Jamie: Oh, yeah…

Laura: Two years.

Jamie: …people all over the world were celebrating that one.

Andrew: Congrats to them.

Jamie: They had release parties…

Andrew: Yeah, that’s good.

Jamie: …everywhere.

Andrew: Oh, bookstores. They’re getting Harry Potter Seven ads now. That’s a good sign.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: That’s right.

Laura: There’s no title, no art.

Jamie: No book.

Laura: No [laughs] – no nothing. But, you know…

Kevin: It’s a poster they could have printed themselves.

Andrew: I’m going to guess that this is going to be a short show this week.

Laura: Oh, there was another poster wasn’t there?

Andrew: What?

Laura: That came out this week.

Andrew: No – what? I…

Laura: Something with Voldemort.

Andrew: I think I missed that. What are you talking about?

Ben: [whispering] “You will lose everything!”

Laura: New Order of the Phoenix promotional [laughs].

Andrew: Oh, oh…

Laura: Yeah, the…

Andrew: The teaser poster.

Laura: I think Ben phrased it the best.

Andrew: What’d he say?

Ben: “You will lose everything.”

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Oh, yeah. Well, we’ll talk about that in a minute. But… I don’t know. I guess it will be a short show this week. Not much to talk about.

Jamie: Under ten minutes, maybe.

Andrew: Ummm, yeah – so, I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Kevin: I’m Kevin Steck.

Laura: And I’m Laura Thompson.

Ben: We’ll see you all next week.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, goodbye. [laughs]

Kevin: Goodbye.

Andrew: Micah Tannenbaum has got a short news piece on the flip side of this hot beat.

[Music continues to play]


News


Micah: The Order of the Phoenix teaser trailer is now officially out. So, everyone, stop going to YouTube. MTV’s Total Request Live today aired a video which featured clips from Order of the Phoenix. They are the same as those in the trailer, and interviews with some of the cast members, including Daniel Radcliffe and Rupert Grint.

An Order of the Phoenix preview will come as part of ABC family’s Harry Potter weekend, which will air the weekend of December 1st through 3rd.

As we reported earlier this month, HBO will begin to show a sneak peek of the fifth Harry Potter movie, starting today, November 20th, and ending on December 17th.

The official website for Order of the Phoenix is now open. Be sure to head over there and check it out.

Last week, Warner Brothers revealed the first official promotional poster for the Order of the Phoenix movie. It depicts Voldemort brandishing his wand with the caption: “You will lose everything.”

And USA Today published four brand-new photos from the Order of the Phoenix movie, in an article which also contained a new interview with Daniel Radcliffe. The photos depict Voldemort, Sirius, Umbridge, and, of course, Harry and Cho kissing. Shortly after this, Warner Brothers released ten brand new pictures from the fifth film, including a few that didn’t make USA today.

Moving away from the fifth film, Barnes and Noble is beginning to receive posters with information on pre-ordering the seventh Harry Potter book. You can see a photo over on MuggleNet.com. However, JK Rowling’s spokesperson has informed us that Book 7 writing is going well, but stores taking pre-orders means absolutely nothing at this time.

Finally, last week Emma Watson gave an enlightening speech at Oxford University, detailing what she’s learned from playing Hermione, how she really enjoys the Potter sets, how Evanna Lynch humbles her and a number of other interesting matters. Emma also spoke a little about her future, explaining how she wishes to continue her schooling and acting career.

That’s all the news for this November 20th, 2006 edition of MuggleCast. Happy Thanksgiving to all our US listeners. Back to the show.


News Discussion: Order of the Phoenix Trailer


Andrew: All right thank you, Micah. I was just kidding, guys.

Jamie: You were really kidding, Andrew?

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Order of the Phoenix. What’s that?

Jamie: What’s that?

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Oh, it’s a new Harry Potter movie coming out next year.

Kevin: Oh, really?

Ben: Oooh.

Laura: Really?

Andrew: O-M-G, guys. Where do we start? This week was a big week for Order of the Phoenix.

Kevin: But not for MuggleNet.

Andrew: And everyone looking forward to it. Yes, not for MuggleNet.

Laura: No.

Andrew: We had record low visitors. No, in all seriousness, there’s a lot to talk about this week. Probably the biggest thing: the Order of the Phoenix trailer was released.

Jamie: Woohoo.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Teaser trailer. A mere 54 seconds, but I thought it was very good.

Jamie: I thought it was very good.

Ben: How long was that…?

Laura: Yeah, it was very good.

Ben: How long was that online? You know what I mean?

Jamie: No.

Andrew: Up on YouTube?

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: No, you…

Andrew: Can I make a confession?

Jamie: You shouldn’t say that, really.

Andrew: …as everyone else will, too? Yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: We all watched it on YouTube.

Jamie: No, we didn’t. We went to Happy Feet. Didn’t we, Andrew?

Ben: Who actually went to see Happy Feet?

Jamie: Every single one of us went to see Happy Feet.

Kevin: It was a very high quality version.

Laura: Well, you know what? Whenever I was pulling down voicemails, there were several unhappy people because the trailer didn’t run with Happy Feet everywhere.

Ben: Really?

Andrew: Well, that had me a bit confused.

Jamie: Well it did for us, didn’t it? Thankfully. That’s lucky.

Andrew: Yeah, luckily.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: People were not happy to see Happy Feet, they were “Sad Feet.” [laughs]

Ben: Oh my God, Andrew.

Jamie: Good one, Andrew. Good one.

Andrew: Yeah, thank you.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] So, the Order of the Phoenix trailer came out. I would have to say my favorite scene from that trailer was the one with Snape.

Jamie: Yeah, it was awesome.

Andrew: What does…

Laura: That was awesome.

Kevin: It was awesome.

Ben: [imitates Snape] “Prove it!”

Andrew: What does Harry say? Yeah, [also imitates Snape] “So, prove it!” I loved it, Alan Rickman…

Jamie: The problem is – the problem with that is…

Laura: That was very good.

Andrew: Perfect Snape.

Jamie: … that’s such a tough…

Ben: Yeah, a bit fat, though, according to everybody.

Jamie: What?

Ben: People keep saying he got fat.

Jamie: Who?

Andrew: He did?

Ben: Alan Rickman.

Laura: No, he didn’t.

Andrew: [laughs] It was just the picture.

Laura: It could have been the lighting.

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: The thing is it’s such a tough emotional scene to do. They’re either going to do that so-so well, or so-so badly.

Laura: Or it’s going to be really bad. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Snape… I really… That was definitely the best part of that trailer.

Jamie: I agree. That was very good.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: I’m looking forward to that scene, I think, the most; just watching Snape trying to get into Harry’s mind.

Laura: What you mean…

Ben: I’m definitely looking forward to…

Laura: You mean your favorite scene…

Ben: …the Voldemort-Dumbledore…

Laura: …wasn’t Harry and Cho?

Jamie: Oh, you’re joking?

Ben: Oh. Oh, that was definitely hotness.

Kevin: Oooh!

Ben: Pure hotness!

Jamie: It was the most forced thing I’ve ever seen in my life.

Kevin: [laughs] Yeah. No kidding.

Laura: What?

Andrew: Ah, yeah. There’s a little debate over the pictures, too.

Jamie: It’s so, so, so, so forced. They’re like…

Ben: So, Jamie, do you think Dan would be a good kisser though, based off that picture?

Jamie: Ummm…

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: [sarcastically] Yeah, well, it’s a pretty big stack of evidence Ben, that one photo. It’s a…

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah…

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Well, I don’t know. I don’t know…

Jamie: I think I can pass a very, very inclusive judgment from that. I’d have to say I don’t know. To be honest, I’ve no idea. I’m sure he would, I’m sure he would. Ask Katie. Ask Katie.

Andrew: Well, didn’t she say “Yes”? [laughs]

Laura: Didn’t she say he was? Yeah.

Ben: Yeah.

Laura: Well, what’s she going to say? [laughs]

Jamie: Well she’s not going to say, “No, it was awful.”

Andrew: Another picture – basically all the pictures that came out were what we saw in the trailer. I don’t they’ve ever done that before, have they? Well, hold on. Let me do a mini “Give Me a Butterbeer” here.

Ben: I think they have, actually.

Andrew: What gets me – yeah, what gets me is that Warner Brothers releases the trailer just in front of Happy Feet, and then they see that all the fans are upset that it’s not going to be online. So they make a compromise; they put ten seconds of it online, Friday night. Now is it just me, or is that really lame of Warner Brothers?

Kevin: Yeah, it’s lame.

Laura: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: I mean – and it’s going to come online in its entirety on Monday on the Happy Feet website. They can’t just throw it on QuickTime or Apple…

Kevin: Well, they’re trying to promote Happy Feet

Laura: Well – Happy Feet.

Andrew: I know, but…

Kevin: …because no one wants to see it without the trailer.

Laura: Yeah, no one cares about dancing penguins…

Jamie: The thing is, they could put it…

Andrew: No…

Laura: Basically [laughs]

Andrew: No, see a lot of people – well, we got a lot of flack about that too. We upset some people who were looking forward to go see Happy Feet.

Ben: Oh. [laughs] Sorry.

Andrew: Let me clear something up…

Laura: Guys…

Andrew: …early on in the show.

Laura: Yeah, really.

Andrew: When we’re talking about stuff here on the show, most of the time we’re just trying to be funny. The Gilmore Girls thing; I was trying to be funny. Happy Feet; I was just trying to be funny. We were all just trying to be funny. So, don’t take it seriously.

Laura: Yeah, and just because we think some thing is bad, doesn’t…

Jamie: Well I think…

Laura: …mean it is.

Jamie: What are you trying to say that the…

Laura: I mean, it’s just our opinions.

Jamie: …views of the MuggleCasters don’t necessarily reflect the views of the site.

Laura: Yeah, they don’t necessarily reflect the views of the site or the listeners, or, frankly, the other hosts.

Andrew: With that said though, I hate The OC. What a terrible show.

[Jamie and Kevin laugh]

Ben: Okay, shut your mouth.

Andrew: No, I’m just kidding.

Jamie: You’d think, though – you’d think that they’d put the trailer in front of a more mainstream film. I’d have thought it…

Kevin: Yeah, you’d think so.

Jamie: …would have gone in front of Bond over Happy Feet, to be honest.

Andrew: It is in front of Bond in Australia, I think.

Jamie: Well, that ruins my theory.

Kevin: Yeah, but what…

[Ben laughs]

Kevin: Like I said, I mean, all they’re trying to do is draw more people to see that movie. Maybe they…

Jamie: Or they’re just expecting it to flop.

Ben: Was Bond even produced by Warner Brothers?

Jamie: Everything is produced by Warner Brothers, Ben, nowadays.

Andrew: Well if it was in front of Bond in Australia, then it might be.

Jamie: Lord of the Rings produced Warner Brothers.

Andrew: I don’t know. We’re going to get a lot of e–mails about this, so someone better check it.

Jamie: Sorry, Warner Brothers produced Lord of the Rings.

Andrew: Kevin, can you check that?

Kevin: Check what? Oh, yeah. Sure.

Ben: They did?

Jamie: Yeah. They have a – the company that produced Lord of the Rings, I can’t remember their name, but it’s a small company under Time Warner.

Laura: New Line Cinema, wasn’t it?

Jamie: Yeah, New Line. That’s it. Time Warner own them.

Andrew: Oh. Hmmm.

Jamie: They own everything, seriously.

Laura: I think Time Warner owns everything. [laughs]

Jamie: Laura…

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Laura…

Kevin: Yeah.

Jamie: Laura, Laura…they own you.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]


News Discussion: Poster


Andrew: Well, then the beginning of this week the Order of the Phoenix teaser poster came out. Anyone impressed by that? If you ask me…

Laura: I thought it looked cool.

Ben: Well, check out the new MuggleNet layout.

Andrew: The caption…

Kevin: It looks okay.

Laura: Yeah, the caption was kind of…

Andrew: “You will lose everything”?

Laura: …kind of weak.

Jamie: What’s it referring to, precisely?

Ben: I don’t even know what that’s even about.

Laura: Well, see, that’s not even a line from the book, so…

Andrew: Yeah. I…

Ben: Well, neither was, “Something wicked this way comes,” but…

Laura: Yeah, but…

Laura and

Andrew:

…that was cool, though.

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Let’s have a ten-pointer question.

Ben: What’s that?

Jamie: What was that from?

Ben: Macbeth. Macbeth.

Laura: Macbeth. [laughs]

Jamie: And what’s the one line before it?

Ben: “Double, double, toil and trouble…”

Laura: “Double, double…”

Andrew: “Double…”

Ben: “Fire burn and cauldron bubble.”

Jamie: It’s not going to go, “Double, double, toil and trouble, something wicked this way comes,” is it?

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: That sounds stupid.

[Ben sings “Double, Double”]

Andrew: Unless it was written that way.

Jamie: It’s, uh – no, it isn’t. It’s, “By the pricking of the thumbs.”

Ben: Yeah.

Laura: “Something wicked this way comes.”

Ben: At least I read Macbeth, so… [trails off, mumbling]

Laura: I used to have that whole thing memorized, because I liked Macbeth in ninth grade. But, yeah. Anyway…

Andrew: For one, I don’t think that was cool little caption to stick in front of Voldemort: “You will lose everything.”

Laura: No, but I think Voldemort looked good, though; the poster.

Andrew: He did look good, but…

Ben: He’s so hot.

[Andrew and Laura laughs]

Andrew: But, I don’t know. Is that a good way to start promoting the movie?

Laura: I don’t know. I think it’s cool.

Andrew: Making some scary guy on the posters, for…

Laura: No, I think it’s good, because it’s showing…

Andrew: That it’s getting darker.

Laura: Yeah, a real darkness to the series. I think they’re trying to draw in adult viewers, too. It’s a good way to do it.

Andrew: Yeah, yeah. Especially with the “PG–13” rating. Obviously it’s going to be another “PG-13” rating.

Laura: Mhm.

Jamie: Yeah, it can’t be – yeah. And, ummm…

Ben: Rated “R.”

Laura: I though it was going to be “G,” actually

Ben: Actually, “NC–17.”

Andrew: “R”? [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah. No. No, Ben, they keep getting worse and worse. Book Seven…

Ben: “X”.

Jamie: …is going to be “NC–17.” Yeah, it’s going to be “X” rated.

[Laura laughs]

Kevin: I just looked it up. OO7 is actually Sony Pictures.

Ben: See, what’d I tell you? That’s the reason they didn’t put it in front of Bond: because they want to promote their own kind.

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Well, that explains it then, doesn’t it?

Kevin: Their own kind?

Ben: Their own Warner Brothers movies.


News Discussion: Pictures


Andrew: Yeah, that’s true. That’s true. Another – back to the pictures – we’re sort of going all over the place here. But, back to the pictures, you can tell some special effects weren’t in place yet. I personally did not like the picture of Umbridge in the Great Hall with the – what was that behind her? The Pendulum?

Ben: Decree thing?

Andrew: No, the pendulum. Swinging behind her. I think it was a pendulum, at least.

Laura: What was wrong with it? I didn’t pay attention…

Andrew: Well, if you look at the picture it looks really fake. They obviously…

Jamie: Well…

Lara: Well…

Andrew: …stuck her in front of it.

Jamie: It’s a movie set, Andrew, to be fair. It’s not a real castle

Laura: We were also watching it…

Andrew: No, but it was a digital effect – well, no, the Great Hall is real. What I’m saying is they stuck the pendulum behind it. It was a cheap job, that’s what I’m saying.

Laura: Andrew, we were also watching it off of a cheap pirate job. [laughs] So…

Andrew: No, no, no. The high-res pictures…

Kevin: No, the picture.

Laura: Oh, the pictures?

Andrew: Yes. The high–res pictures.

Laura: Oh, I don’t know. I didn’t pay that much attention.

Andrew: I could’ve done a better job PhotoShopping her in. But anything else stick out for anyone?

Ben: Oh, I don’t know. I like the kissing picture. Oh my God; Dan and Cho!

Laura: Did you see some people were kind of not happy that Warner Brothers showed that? Because they wanted to wait until the movie came out.

Andrew: Well, they’re going to have to, eventually.

Ben: Well, don’t check MuggleNet, if you don’t want to be spoiled.

Laura: Yeah, well they wanted to be surprised. I’m like, “You already know what happens.”

Ben: Voldemort look sweet when he’s walking through the fog, or whatever that is.

Laura: Yeah.

Kevin: Oh, yeah.

Jamie: Andrew, going back to the Umbridge one, I completely agree with you. The pendulum’s too big for the place, basically, and she just…

Andrew: Why would they put it in the Great Hall?

Laura: It’s too big for Hogwarts. [laughs]

Jamie: But, I just… She doesn’t… She isn’t Umbridge for me, really, I must admit.

Laura: Really? I think she looks good.

Ben: I thought that was Aunt Petunia…

Andrew: If her acting is good…

Ben: …at first.

Jamie: Yeah, she does. She looks a bit like Aunt Petunia. She needs the actual – the different…

Ben: She needs to be fatter, to be honest.

Jamie: Yeah. Yeah, she does need to be fatter.

Laura: Okay, it’s Hollywood, though…

Andrew: I think she needs to be shorter.

Jamie: Huh?

Andrew: It doesn’t matter.

Ben: Look at…

Laura: No, but see, even – it’s Hollywood. I mean, even Dudley isn’t… [laughs] I mean – I think it said…

Ben: Okay, it doesn’t matter. Don’t even go there, because there are fat actors.

Laura: No, I’m just – I know, but see, there aren’t as many of them as there are thin actors.

Kevin: I think if her acting is good, I think it will compensate for the lack of meeting our…

Jamie: Laura, you can – you don’t actually have to have a fat person to play a fat person, now, anyway. They have…

Laura: No, I know. They have…

Jamie: …they have like, special fats suits and…

Laura: Yeah, they have fat suits.

Jamie: …digital effects, and stuff like that. Do you think you could just go into a… [laughs]

Laura: But they won’t – okay.

Jamie: …into like, a specialist shop and ask for a fat suit?

[Kevin and Laura laugh]

Ben: Hey, isn’t Dumbledore, isn’t he a bit like – he looks sentimental in this picture.

Andrew: Oh, I love Dumbledore in the teaser.

Ben: Is this the Wizen…

Jamie: Oh, yeah, that’s awesome.

Ben: In this picture… In this picture, is this the Wiz – not the Wizengamot. This is Dumbledore at the trial, isn’t it?

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Is that Mrs. Figg behind him?

Jamie: It is a very, very, very good job, there.

Andrew: Probably. I’ll take a look at it…

Ben: This looks similar to like, the pictures we saw of the Wizengamot – not the Wizengamot, but the trials in Goblet of Fire, doesn’t it?

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Because it’s the same set.

Ben: Oh, is it really?

Jamie: No, Ben…

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: …Ben, it’s the same dungeon. He says, when he walks in, in Order of the Phoenix, he gasps, because he remembers…

Ben: He’s been there before.

Kevin: He remembers it, yeah.

Jamie: …the place where, yeah, the Lestranges were sentenced to life imprisonment.

Ben: Oh.

Andrew: They’re using, for the Room of Requirement set, they are using – ah, I forget now. It was a classroom, but they’re using…

Jamie: Oh, really?

Andrew: …it for the Room of Requirement now. Yeah, they just took out like the…

Jamie: The chairs and stuff.

Andrew: They took out the – well, no. They cut the… [laughs] I’m such a bad reporter.

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: They took out the – what are those things in the middle of the room?

Jamie: Tables?

Ben: Pillars?

Andrew: The pillars!

Laura: Desks?

Andrew: Yeah, they cut the pillars in half.

Laura: Oh.

Andrew: It looks kind of goofy, but that’s what they did. So…

Jamie: Cool.

Andrew: At any rate…

Ben: Then how’s the ceiling standing up?

Jamie: [laughs] Yeah.

Andrew: Well, because the…

Ben: Why hasn’t it fallen in on them?

Andrew: …sides. I don’t know. Why don’t you – I guess you’ll have to ask a…

Jamie: A structural architect, which…

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: …we’ve got plenty of those as listeners.


Announcements


Andrew: Moving along, we have a few announcements for everyone, as usual. Purchase your MuggleCast t-shirts because there is a pandemic that’s about to happen, and it’s called, “No More MuggleCast T-Shirts For Sale.”

Ben: No more.

Andrew: So, it’s very important that you order your t-shirts before January 1st. Again, we’re not doing this to – it’s not some…

Ben: Trick.

Andrew: … “get rich quick” scheme. Yeah. Once we stop, we have to stop. People have been asking us, “Why do we have to stop?” It’s in accordance with WB’s new merchandising policy. And our shirt printer, Sam, wanted us to tell everyone that you do not need a PayPal account to order t-shirts, all you need to do is click the button that says, “click here if you don’t have a PayPal account,” and then you can use your credit card and I think you can also pay by eCheck, I think it’s called. So you don’t just need PayPal when you order it, and when you see “PayPal,” don’t be afraid and, you know, close it out. T-shirts are selling out fast, though, and we’re trying to keep up with everyone’s orders. Guys, seriously, if you’re thinking about buying a t-shirt, you better do it now, because they’re either going to run out quick, or they are going to – January 1st is going to roll around. So, that is that.

Don’t forget to vote for us on Podcast Alley. I think it’s a fun new game here to start making fun of Keith and the Girl.

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: Just to get their listeners angry at us.

Jamie: Yep.

Andrew: Their show’s a joke, seriously.

Laura: What is Keith and the Girl?

Jamie: It’s a joke. It’s actually a joke.

Andrew: It’s a show where they talk about – yeah, I listened to one or two. I mean, they’re kind of funny, but [laughs] they – the show’s, you know, they just talk about nonsense. Regularly.

Ben: Sounds like ours. [laughs]

Jamie: What’s going on with us, though?

Andrew: Yeah, basically, how we’re going today. [laughs] And, Ben, you have a little announcement? Something new this week?

Ben: Everybody, everybody! Now shipping, MuggleNet.com’s What Will Happen in Harry Potter Seven: Who Lives, Who Dies, and How the Adventure Finally Ends. I forgot “Who Falls in Love”…

Jamie: You forgot – yeah. [laughs]

Ben: …but there’s that in there, too.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Yeah, sale’s been good so far. You can purchase it at your local retail stores. All the books have been shipped out, so go out and buy it now. It has information on who we think is going to live, who we think is going to die, all that stuff.

Jamie: And how the adventure’s going to finally end. [laughs]

Ben: [laughs] Yeah, how the adventure’s going to finally end, so go buy it.

Andrew: Wait, you guys know?

Ben: We don’t know…

Jamie: Yeah, she told us. Yeah, she told us, didn’t she, Ben?

Ben: …but we have a good idea, we think.

Andrew: I’ve been seeing some e-mails. You guys have been getting some good reviews.

Jamie: Really?

Andrew: Congrats on that.

Jamie: Awesome.

Andrew: Well, congrats to myself, too. Andy Gordon is my penname, after all.

Jamie: Yep.

Ben: [laughs] Oh, shut up. It is not, for the millionth time.

Andrew: But, I’ve got a question for you guys. If I am an environmentalist…

Ben: Mhm.

Andrew: …the first question that comes to my mind about this book is…

Ben: It’s printed on recycled paper.

Andrew: …what percentage – okay, good.

Ben: [laughs] I just made that up, I don’t know if it is.

Andrew: Just wanted to clear that up. Oh.

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: Well then, let me finish what I was saying. What – what’s the percentage of recycled paper? Because usually it says on the back of a book, like, you know, “This was 37 percent recycled paper.”

Jamie: It was 110 percent, wasn’t it, Ben? Something like that.

Andrew: Oh, wow.

Ben: Actually, I have a copy of it right here.

Kevin: It’s zero percent.

Ben: Let me see.

Andrew: Does it say?

Kevin: They’re killing the rainforest.

Andrew: Oh.

Ben: Let me see. On the back…

Kevin: Yep. You’re killing the rainforest.

Andrew: It might not actually say it. Some books do. [laughs]

Ben: No, it says, “This book is an independent and unauthorized fan publication. No endorsement or sponsorship by or affiliation with JK Rowling, [starts speaking quickly] her publishers, or other copyrighted trademarks…. [mumbles and laughs] It’s very nice. It is very nice, though. I have a copy of it right here.

[Kevin laughs]

Ben: Jamie, Jamie, they misspelled your name.

Kevin: Get to the paper part.

Jamie: Sorry?

Ben: They misspelled your name on the cover.

Jamie: No, they didn’t, Ben. No, they didn’t. I know, I’ve seen it.

[Andrew and Ben laugh]

Jamie: They have not, because now I know.

[Andrew and Ben continue to laugh]


Listener Rebuttal: Forbidden Forest


Andrew: Before we get into our main discussion this week, we have a rebuttal from everyone. And I want to remind everyone that we’re doing weekly wrap-ups on MuggleCast.com with some more of your listener rebuttals, so we can get more of them out there. We get a good – what? 200 e-mails a day, now? Rebuttals and stuff.

Laura: Yeah, something like that.

Andrew: That’s a lot! And we love reading all of them, and we’re trying to get as many of them out onto the site, and onto the podcast. But, anyway, this one comes from Zoë – there’s two dots over her “e,” so what the hell does that mean?

Ben: Zo-eh?

Andrew: Long e?

Laura: That means it Zoë [zoh-ee].

Andrew: Zo-eh?

Laura: No, Zoë [zoh-ee].

Jamie: That just means it’s not Zoh.

Laura: Zoë [zoh-ee].

Andrew: Zoë [zoh-ee].

Ben: It’s Zoë [zoh-ee], instead of zoh.

Jamie: Okay, I’ll probably get a million e-mails in telling me that I don’t know my name etymology, but it…

Ben: German.

Jamie: If it didn’t have those two words – which are umlauts, I think that’s what they’re called – it would be zoh, and it turns it into Zoë [zoh-ee].

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: All right, well Zoë…

Laura: That’s what I was saying.

Andrew: …18, from New York, writes about the Forbidden Forest. She just wanted to point out that JKR said in an interview, that Fluffy resides in the Forbidden Forest because, “Anything that is dangerous is released to the forest.” That was back in 2001. So, there’s another creature that lives in the forest for us.

Jamie: It must be very dense then, and it must be hard to get out of it then, because otherwise Fluffy could just escape and wander out.

Kevin: [laughs] Wander on to the school grounds and maul someone.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: Unless it is just like instinct that they stay in there. Because they have got to find – they could find their way out. It’s not like there is a wall of trees that you can’t get through.

Ben: Well, it’s home.

Jamie: Yeah, but it could be magic though.

Andrew: It’s home, yeah.

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: Well, it wouldn’t matter, Andrew, for Dumbledore. This is a weird one [laughs] – it wouldn’t matter for Dumbledore because he gets every MuggleCast episode on his iPod before it is even recorded. [laughs] I like that one.

[Andrew does a fake laugh]

Ben: No. I don’t.

Andrew: How is that possible? Because I edit them.

Jamie: No, Andrew, no. It’s Dumbledore.

Andrew: And then put them up right away.

Laura: It’s a joke! [laughs]

Andrew: I know, Laura, and I’m countering the joke with my joke.

[Laura laughs]

Kevin: Which no one liked.

Laura: Yeah, really.


Main Discussion: Voldemort and Evil


Andrew: Let’s get into the main discussion this week. [does a Dr. Evil impression] Evil. Dr. Evil.

Ben: [Dr. Evil impression] Be evil.

Andrew: Everyone like my Austin Powers quote there? [Dr. Evil impression] Evil.

Laura: Not really. [laughs]

Andrew: I have my pinky to my mouth. [Dr. Evil impression] Evil.

Ben: [Dr. Evil impression] Be evil, but I have feelings too, change my life with Oprah and Maya Angelou.

Andrew: [Dr. Evil impression] Fire the laser.

Jamie: That’s very good, Andrew, very good. I almost feel like I’m in the room with Dr. Evil.

Ben: [Dr. Evil impression] Laser.


Are Voldemort’s Goals Worthwhile?


Jamie: Okay, so today I thought we would discuss: is evil a matter of opinion? We all consider Voldemort to be evil and Harry good, but does it depend on where you are looking at them from? Because Voldemort’s Death Eaters, I’m sure that some follow him out of fear and because they are scared of what will happen, but there have got to be some who actually agree with what he is doing. Sirius said that his mom agreed with what Voldemort was doing and only got cold feet when she realized exactly what lengths he would go to, to achieve his goal, and it kind of follows the phrase “One man’s terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter”. So, ignoring all morals and ethics, is Voldemort’s goal worthwhile as Harry’s and does it depend on how you are looking at him to decide whether he is good or evil – basically.

Andrew: How do you think that Voldemort’s goals could be worthwhile?

Laura: I don’t think so.

Jamie: Not the killing and stuff, but his ultimate goal is to run the magical world.

Laura: Is to kill all the Muggleborns. [laughs]

Kevin: Yeah.

Jamie: No, no. Okay, I knew I’d get ripped for this…

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: …for this main discussion. That is not what I’m saying.

[Kevin and Laura laugh]

Ben: It wasn’t even me, man.

Jamie: Yeah I know, Ben, it wasn’t you. I’m very impressed.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: I’ll buy you something nice for that. No, what I’m saying is that his ultimate goal is to achieve power. Okay? It doesn’t have anything to do… Killing people is his method, it isn’t his – I know it’s terrible; but as I said, ignoring all morals, is he just somebody who has a goal. And we have been – we think he is evil because all the books are called Harry Potter and the Whatever. We’ve sympathized with him – we’ve only ever heard words saying Voldemort is bad and stuff like that. Isn’t there any – you know, is that possible?

Ben: Well, the only thing would is if you honestly believe anyone that is Muggle-born or those things are actually detrimental to society.

Jamie: No, it’s not that. It’s just…

Ben: You know what I mean?

Laura: Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: No, but…

Ben: What are you trying to say then? Is Voldemort just a – is he really a nice guy who is just [laughs] trying to achieve power?


Looking at Voldemort in a Different Light


Jamie: Okay, here’s one. Can we present him in a different light? Say a lonely, frightened soul killing because it’s the only thing he can do…

Laura: No.

Kevin [laughs] No.

Jamie: …and punishing those he is jealous of, shunning possible friends out of fear, and living a depraved half life, a cursed life, one in which he is feared when he wishes to be loved.

Laura: But that is what he lives.

Ben: No. He made those choices.

Laura: I don’t think so because Dumbledore said to Harry in Half-Blood Prince. He said, “Do you feel sorry for Voldemort? You shouldn’t because he was born evil.” And he had the choice, and he had the time to change that and he didn’t.

Jamie: Okay, well, loads of people have chances to change things and make things right. But they don’t, out of fear, out of, you know – I’m completely playing devil’s advocate here. Okay?

Laura: What did he have to fear though? He was more powerful than anyone around him.

Jamie: I’m completely playing devil’s advocate here.

Laura: He was more powerful than anyone around him.

Jamie: Fear of rejection.

Laura: Well, then play devil’s advocate but you have to defend it.

Jamie: I am! What do you think I’m doing? Fear of rejection…

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: …fear of losing his power. All people who gain power are scared of losing it. There is a way of presenting him in a better light. I know… I’m not saying… I know I’m going to get e-mails saying “Oh, how could you ever think that killing Muggles is good?” I’m not saying that. I’m just saying that it is possible to present him in a different light. We’ve ever seen the bad side of him. I know all through the books from his childhood to where he is now he has been presented as bad, but don’t you kind of feel sorry for that small boy Tom Riddle? Completely alone in that orphanage, scaring people because it was the only thing he knew.

Laura: Yeah. Don’t you feel sorry for that small boy Harry Potter who was locked up in a closet for all those years of his life?

Ben: Because of Tom Riddle.

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: Yes, of course. But…

Ben: But still, but still. The thing is…

Laura: No, Harry didn’t allow that to bring him down and Tom Riddle did.

Ben: But see, Tom Riddle is just a victim of the circumstances, I think. It was just one decision led to another, and next thing you know, he is this big evil lord.

Jamie: Killing people.

Ben: He took the initial step down the wrong path, and it became too late for him to redeem himself.

Jamie: And then it was a slippery slope, yeah.

Ben: Yeah, so.

Jamie: But, I don’t…

Laura: Yeah, well. It’s one thing to make a mistake, it’s quite another to torture children in a cave.

Jamie: But, yeah, I know. It is and it’s terrible, but…

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: …you can’t… I know it’s his fault there and then, but you can’t – loads of people, serial killers, people who are sociopaths, clinically diagnosed as sociopaths loads of them, most of them have terrible, terrible childhoods. You know, that can…

Laura: Yeah, but there comes a time when you have to stop blaming your childhood when you grow up.

Jamie: Yes, you do, of course you do, but you can’t say it isn’t a factor. Some people don’t know whether to not blame their childhood.

Laura: Well, sure it’s a factor.

Jamie: That is the thing. If it turns you into something that you don’t know is wrong, then you don’t think it needs to be fixed. And that is Voldemort.

Ben: For me, it’s like – in a way it’s like saying the child who grew up in poverty, it’s his fault. You know what I mean?

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: If that makes any sense?

Andrew: How is it his fault?

Laura: It’s not. I know. It’s not saying that that is his fault.

Ben: It’s not. It’s not for Voldemort. Voldemort is just a victim of his circumstances.

Jamie: In some regards, yeah, he could be seen as that.

Laura: It is his fault that he didn’t get over it.

Jamie: No, it’s not. I cannot be his fault.

Ben: How is he supposed to?

Andrew: Not really. Because if you grow up with it, you’re kind of stuck.

Jamie: Laura, if there is no path to get over it, than you just can’t do it. You need to have a step up.

Laura: That’s not true, that is absolutely not true. My best friend, one of my best friends, you guys, is the daughter of an extremely racist woman, and she herself is not racist. She has gotten over that. So, you can get over stuff like that. You can’t just say that because you were brought up a certain way you can’t get beyond it.

Ben: But, no, no. If she was born racist, I mean, how can you blame her? You know what I mean?

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: If she was born that way, but she wasn’t.

Laura: No, she was…

Ben: It’s a difference. She chose not to take the influencing of her mother. It wasn’t like…

Laura: Yeah, but it takes a long time to get over stuff like that. I mean, the same way with Voldemort. You can be born with deranged… He’s just – I just think that he is really messed up.

Jamie: But some people are so firmly indoctrinated with it, that they don’t know that it’s a bad thing. If you’ve been told your entire life…

Laura: And that makes them wrong. [laughs]

Jamie: …that stealing is right. Yes, of course it does, it doesn’t make them bad because of it though. If they don’t know anything else.

Laura: You can’t say – yes it does!

Jamie: No it doesn’t!

Andrew: Jamie, are you saying that Voldemort knows no consequences, basically?

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: No, I’m not saying that. What I’m saying is, if you are taught, if you are brought up and you are told and told again that stealing is okay, then society – it is not your fault. Yes, you are wrong. You are entirely incorrect. However, it is not entirely your fault because of that. You can’t be expected to question everything that your parents tell you, especially at that early age. It is impossible to do that.

Kevin: It’s not your fault but upon society informing you that it is wrong, then, it’s your fault if you do it again. Because you have made the choice to ignore what is commonly accepted…

Laura: That it’s wrong.

Kevin: …as a standard in society and listen to your parents over that society and therefore you’re wrong.

Ben: Not necessarily, because if you were younger, this is continually basically pounded into your mind that stealing is okay…

Jamie: Precisely. It’s indoctrination.

Ben: …when you get older and then someone tells you…

Laura: But stealing is a…

Ben: Well, stealing isn’t commonly accepted. You’re going to say, “Well, that’s a bunch of crap. This is the way I was brought up. There’s no way my parents were…”

Jamie: Precisely, that’s exactly it. Exactly it.

Laura: Okay, but then, even if you didn’t believe that person, why the heck would you go into a store and think that stealing is okay?

Ben: Because you’re taught that way!

Laura: And they have these lovely things called cash registers where people are giving them money.

Ben: Okay, Laura, you’re missing the point.

[Laura and Andrew laugh]

Ben: You’re taught that stealing was okay. It isn’t like you go in there and you say, “Oh, cash registers.”

Laura: No.

Kevin: At a certain point, you get to think for yourself.

Laura: Yeah.

Kevin: And at that point, when you make the choice to continue stealing, then you’ve made that choice and you’re wrong.

Laura: And see, that’s the thing though. Voldemort wasn’t brought up believing anything. He always thought for himself, which makes him wrong.

Jamie: You’re saying “wrong” because you think that that’s wrong.

Laura: No, no. No one ever…

Jamie: You have you’re own opinions there.

Laura: No one ever brought him up saying it’s okay to go and hang bunny rabbits and torture children in a cave. So, he’s wrong.

Jamie: You’re saying he’s wrong from your own opinion. Why is what you think right?

Laura: No! It’s not an opinion!

Jamie: Of course it is.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: It’s like some ethical issues in society like stem cell research. Just because I think it’s okay…

Jamie: It doesn’t mean Ben’s right. No.

Ben: …doesn’t mean everyone does.

Jamie: And it doesn’t mean that’s right, either.

Laura: But the torture of a human being [laughs] is a little different.

Ben: What if they deserved it?

Jamie: Yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: What if the bunny peed on the carpet?

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: Then he deserves to get his little head chopped off.

Andrew: I think Jamie…

Laura: Well then, you know what? Then you guys should have killed me when I spilled that coffee all over the floor in LA.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: I was ready to. You spilled two things that…

Jamie: Well yeah, yeah exactly. We were planning to until John talked us out of it

Ben: Yeah, you started kicking everything over. You klutz.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: I can’t help it that you guys had stuff all over that room.

Andrew: It was coffee. [laughs] Why do you have to call it “stuff?” I think Jamie and Ben are sticking up for it for discussion sake, Laura.

Jamie: No.

Andrew: I don’t think that…

Jamie: No, I’m not. I’m saying I agree wholeheartedly that somebody cannot say on ethical and moral issues that “you are wrong.” Because, that’s why you don’t use the word “correct” and “incorrect,” you use “right” and “wrong.” Murder is “wrong.” It’s not “incorrect.” It’s morally wrong.

Ben: He’s right.

Jamie: It’s not morally incorrect, it’s – that’s how it is. You cannot use – you can’t express your moral opinions as fact. It’s impossible.

Ben: So, things like the death penalty, abortion, etc. They are…

Jamie: Yeah, it’s wrong…

Ben: If there was a correct answer, it would be obvious. But, it’s all a matter of opinion what your perspective on it is.

Jamie: And taking it back to Harry Potter.

Ben: Harry Potter?

Jamie: Yeah, sorry I couldn’t remember the name of that book series we sometimes talk about.

[Everyone laughs]


Voldemort’s Upbringing Compared to Real-Life Situations


Jamie: I just… You just can’t say that because… I just think that if he had to have a different upbringing, things could be different. That’s what I’m saying. It’s… You can’t, you can’t deny that he had a bad life. And, I’m not saying that it’s not his fault that he didn’t try to change it, but it’s not his fault either that he didn’t know his mother, you know? All those kind of things. It’s just stuff like that.

Kevin: See, the argument against that is this. There are quite a few people living in poverty today, right? You’re raised in the gang area. Now, you join a gang and kill someone.

Andrew: Oooh.

Kevin: Many would argue you had to join the gang because it’s survival, but the…

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: …counter-argument is what about that kid down the street that went to Harvard? Just because you had a bad life, doesn’t mean you don’t have the moral basis to make a choice for yourself and try to change it.

Jamie: But, it doesn’t mean you do either. It doesn’t mean you do either. I know what you’re saying, but that would be taking into account…

Kevin: Taking into account what? They’re two people coming from the same place.

Jamie: Okay, if that went to trial – that murder case you were talking about – the fact that they lived where they did and joined the gang and that they joined the gang out of necessity. There’s a legal defense of necessity. Okay? Now that is the kind of thing that would come into play. They’d say, “I had to join this gang.” That’s why that case of murder is different from somebody who walks out onto the street and kills somebody just walking across the road. It is different.

Kevin: Either way, it’s tried as murder because you’ve killed someone.

Jamie: Of course it’s tried as murder, but that doesn’t mean that the outcome is…

Kevin: The only thing that will make it so that it’s not tried as murder is if you had an insanity defense which you could – you would have to prove that you didn’t know the difference between right and wrong.

Jamie: Well, there’s… Perhaps…

Kevin: Because you are a human being, you have the choice to pull the trigger or not. You have the moral basis for it.

Jamie: Yes, of course. Okay, Kevin, if somebody put a gun to… Okay, if somebody put a gun to, say, your mother’s head, okay? And said to you, said to…

Andrew: [laughs] That’s good to think about.

Jamie: No, no. Said to you, “Go out and kill the first person you see.” Okay?

Kevin: Right.

Jamie: Yeah? There are so many complications in that case that it would not go down as straight-out murder immediately. Okay? There are so many things to consider. If you went out and killed that person, yes, you have killed that person, but the question that would be asked is, were you so provoked that any rational, normal human being equally provoked would have committed the same crime that you committed?

Laura: But Voldemort wasn’t provoked. [laughs]

Ben: Hold on. Here’s the difference though. It’s a question of are people really victims of the circumstances?


Voldemort: Nature vs. Nurture


Jamie: Yes, nature versus nurture.

Ben: And to what extent are they? And is it… See, I think the difference was that Harry was born with the instinct, the fighter instinct that Voldemort wasn’t blessed with. You see what I’m saying?

Jamie: Yes, exactly.

Ben: So, it isn’t Voldemort’s fault. He fell victim to the circumstances when Harry was able to fight.

Jamie: The choice that he has made is to go out and kill people, not that he isn’t bad.

Kevin: But he made a choice.

Jamie: Yes, that is one choice. He could still be bad, but stop himself from killing people. He could have terrible thoughts about killing people you’d still think he was evil if he had those thoughts, even if he didn’t follow up and act on them. The fact that his choice is killing them, yes, he’s bad because of that, but the fact that he is able to do these things. There are people today that could not kill somebody. You know, who could just not do it even when so provoked they could never ever bring themselves to do that whereas Voldemort can and his choice is to do it. His choice is not to be able to do it, which is a product of his circumstance.

Laura: But what circumstance influenced that? He grew up in an orphanage.

Jamie: Yeah, he grew up orphaned.

Laura: It’s not like…

Ben: No parents.

Jamie: No parents, no friends.

Laura: Okay. Harry had no parents. Harry had no friends.

Jamie: Yes.

Laura: Not to mention I think he would have been more screwed up growing up with the Gaunt family than growing up in that orphanage.

Andrew: No, but you’ve got to think…

Laura: So, he’s probably lucky that his mom died. [laughs] Not to sound mean or anything.

Ben: Now, that’s just rude.

Jamie: That’s ridiculous.

Ben: No, because his mom was different than the rest of them, the rest of the Gaunts.

Laura: No, yeah but his mom submissed to everybody, and they were inbred and they were abusive. He could have grown up in a life of abuse…

Jamie: Laura. Laura.

Laura: …which is a lot worse than growing up in an orphanage.

Ben: No. You can’t make that determination.

Jamie: I know, you can’t always go – I know Dumbledore says it’s our choices that make us who we are. Yes, but you can’t start choosing from as soon as you’re born and that’s the thing.

Kevin: Yeah, but he was put in a circumstance that other people have been in and turned out completely normal.

Laura: Were in, yeah.

Jamie: He has. He did.

Kevin: But because of his choices, the choices that he made at that stage in his life, he’s evil.

Ben: Why did he make those choices though?

Kevin: He’s completely responsible.

Laura: Because he’s evil.

Kevin: Exactly. He’s completely responsible for himself.

Jamie: He made the choices because he didn’t know. No, that’s absolutely not true.

Ben: [laughs] That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. You’re trying to tell me if when I’m two years old, I take a butcher knife and I chop my mom’s head off that I made the conscience decision to do that?

[Andrew and Jamie laugh]

Andrew: Well, it depends on if you were living in a well-rounded family, everything was happy-go-lucky and then you just decided to go cut your mom’s head off, well, I’d think there’s something wrong with you.

[Andrew, Ben, and Laura laugh]

Laura: Yeah, but the thing is when you’re that young you don’t have any…

Andrew: Right. You don’t…

Laura: You don’t really know.

Ben: Yeah. That’s the point Jamie’s trying to make. You can’t make the choices when you’re that young and so it eventually leads up to the point when you can make the choice. Like it comes to the point when you can make the choice, but your background influences that choice.

Jamie: Exactly.

Laura: Okay, but if a five-year old kid doesn’t know that it’s wrong to chop off their mom’s head with a butcher knife, there’s something wrong. [laughs]

Jamie: They don’t see it like that though, Laura. It’s not seen like that when they do that.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: You know, you’ve got to take into account their background as well. You can’t just say if two people…

Laura: I’m not saying there’s something wrong with them necessarily. I’m saying there’s something wrong.

Jamie: If two identical people, one with a terrible background, one with idyllic childhood, both kill someone, you’re saying that their cases are absolutely identical because there’s a choice.

Laura: No, I’m not.

Jamie: Well, there you go then. Then Voldemort…

Laura: I’m not saying they’re identical, but I’m saying that Voldemort grew up in an orphanage full of kids and none of them grew up to be murderers.

Jamie: How do you know?

Kevin: That’s exactly what my idea is.

Laura: They all received the same treatment.

Kevin: Exactly.

Jamie: Yes, you’re right and their correctness lies in the choices after a bad childhood. Voldemort is wrong to choose what he did. It doesn’t mean his childhood didn’t influence what he did. He just didn’t choose the same path as the other ones. You know, it could be a flaw that causes him to do that.

Andrew: Plus he could do magic.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: So, he sort of went a different way once he realized he could start doing magic.

Jamie: It’s a flaw that caused that. It’s not – you could say it’s a flaw in his character.

Ben: It’s not his fault.

Jamie: Exactly. You can’t just say that…

Laura: Yeah, a flaw in his character that he’s evil.

Jamie: No.

Ben: Right, but did he choose to be evil? Did he choose to be evil?

Laura: No, I don’t think so. I think he was born evil.

Andrew: I don’t think you can choose to be evil.

Ben: Then how can you blame him?

Jamie: Yeah, if he was born evil it’s not his fault.

Laura: What I’m saying is that – no, it’s not someone’s fault if they’re born evil, but, you can’t sit there and say, “Oh well, you know, we should look at them in a good light or any of that. We should look at them in a different light.” We should look at them in a different light.

Jamie: I’m not saying we should look at them in a good way.

Ben: Good and bad is all relative. Voldemort’s followers think he’s doing the greatest thing ever, you know.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: It’s all relative.

Jamie: One man’s terrorist…

Ben: He said, “One man’s terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter.”

Jamie: One man’s Harry Potter…no, actually not.

Kevin: This sounds like a philosophy class.

Jamie: It is a philosophy class.

Laura: Yeah. [laughs]


Tangent: Spells, Curses, Jinxes and Hexes


Jamie: That’s exactly what it is. Okay, moving on from this then, digressing slightly; aren’t the names of the spells, curses, jinxes, hexes just a matter of opinion too? As Hermione… As Hermione insinuates in Order of the Phoenix when she says that what Slinkhard calls counter curses or something like that, aren’t really. They’re sort of anti-jinxes or something like that. Isn’t that true?

Andrew: What does Hermione say?

Jamie: Okay. Curses, jinxes, hexes have really negative connotations, yeah? Whereas a spell and a…

Ben: A charm.

Jamie: …have good connotations. Yeah, charm. Aren’t they relative? Sorry, aren’t they subjective terms? Couldn’t one man’s hex be another man’s charm?

[Andrew, Kevin, and Laura laugh]

Kevin: Wow.

Andrew: I guess so.

Ben: I know, but you have a Charms class that’s the only thing.

Andrew: Well, one man’s hex can be another man’s charm. Well, wouldn’t that be like Voldemort’s – no. Yeah, if Voldemort’s using a hex it’s a charm to him. Is that what you’re saying?

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: It’s a subjective term calling it that. It is, though. I’m not saying that Avada Kedavra is a nice, nice charm. But…

[Andrew and Ben laugh]

Laura: Well, it is to use on some people.

Jamie: Yes, well perhaps it is. Perhaps…

Ben: We’ll have a value debate.

[Laura laughs]


Back to Voldemort


Jamie: Okay, back to… Ben don’t worry. Okay. We don’t blame Harry for having thoughts like in Order of the Phoenix when he, you know, scoffs and laughs at Ron at becoming a Prefect. You just don’t see the thoughts of everyone else’s world. You just see the evilness of Voldemort. There is – we’re so engrained with thinking that Harry’s the hero, which he is, the hero, of course he’s the hero, and that that side is good that we just… There’s like, a barrier between us. I’m not – as I’m going to keep saying, as I know I’m going to get e-mails about this, I’m not saying that Voldemort is a nice, nice person. He’s a horrible, horrible person, but as Mr. Ollivander says in Book One, “He did great things. Terrible things, absolutely terrible things, but great things.” You’ve got to, you’ve got to…

Andrew: Commend him for that? [laughs]

Jamie: He’s a…

Andrew: Give him a plaque? [laughs]

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: You’ve got to commend him for that! Yes. I’m going to give him a badge next time I see him. And a slice of cake. Okay.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: What I’m saying is, he did – he is a clever, clever, clever guy, as well. This is… Okay, this is…

Laura: Oh yeah.

Jamie: …this is moving slightly from the good versus evil…

Kevin: Well…

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: …but he’s clever in how he…

Andrew: That’s what he’s doing. [laughs]

Jamie: …in how he… Yeah, in how he does things. He cheats, jinxes.

Kevin: He kills. [laughs]

Jamie: I know, I’m not saying it’s good, but that’s – stuff like that. He’s… But you’ve got, we’ve got to look at it from his side, as well. His childhood, where he is now. You just can’t look at him and say, “He’s evil and it’s his fault.” Basically.

Andrew: Well, he’s got big you-know-whats come to think of it.

Laura: Well, it’s not his fault that he’s evil… Okay, it’s not his fault that he’s evil, but it’s his fault that he didn’t work to change that. [laughs] That’s what I’m saying.

Kevin: Yeah, I…

Jamie: But what you’re saying. You’re saying…

Ben: But there’s a psychological mindset. How can you go against it?

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

Andrew: This, this relates. In my health class, we were learning about fetal alcohol syndrome. Everyone know about this? And…

Laura: Yes.

Jamie: No.

Andrew: [laughs] What we learned, what the teacher was telling us was that the – when you have fetal alcohol syndrome, you see no consequences. Like, if you – and we watched this video where there were stories of these kids. If you, there was this one kid who, he turned on the bath and then left the water running and it overflowed, but that’s what his dad told him to do – to keep the water running when he’s getting in the shower. He just kept it running and there was no consequence and he completely ruined the house. But, what I’m saying is, there are psychological cases where it isn’t your fault, like that.

Jamie: No, yeah, yeah, yeah. It’s… See, I think you’ve…

Laura: Yeah, but…[sighs]

Jamie: …completely missed my point, though. I’m not saying that he’s good, but…

Kevin: You’re saying from his perspective, from his perspective things…

Andrew: We know that.

Jamie: You just can’t…

Andrew: Yeah, it’s not his choice.

Laura: Yeah, and it is all subjective, but…

Jamie: Yeah.

Laura: …that’s point of the discussion. [laughs] So, I don’t why… [laughs]

Andrew: On the other hand, there’s no real proof that it was his choice. We’re just doing this for discussion’s sake, aren’t we?

Laura: Well, didn’t Dumbledore say that he was pretty much born evil? I thought that’s what he said.

Ben: Or JK Rowling said that, too.

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: If you’re born evil, then surely that solves the discussion that if you’re… I mean, you say that other people are faced with a similar childhood and that they make choices to get out of their depravity, but how many people do you know who have been born evil? I’m sure he’s like, one in a million who have been born evil.

Kevin: Well, I mean, I’m sure there’s people out there who are psychos, but they do not act on their tendencies because they know it’s not accepted by society.

Ben: No, that – but then they’re not psychos. If they can make the choice.

Jamie: Yeah. So, that concludes our main discussion for the week. A poll will be put up asking if you agree that Voldemort can be considered in a different light or if he is innately, completely, manifestly, majestically, uncontrollably evil. So, thank you.


Dueling Club: Lily vs. Bellatrix


Andrew: We’re going to have another dueling club right now. This one comes from Tom, 14, of – eh, what’s this called? This town here? [mispronounces] Hertfordshire? That’s kind of a weird name.

Jamie: Huh? Where’s that? Where’s that?

Andrew: [mispronounces] Hertfordshire? Is that how you say it?

Jamie: Hertfordshire. [laughs]

Andrew: [mispronounces] Hertfordshire?

Ben: [laughs] It’s in England, isn’t it?

Jamie: Hertfordshire.

Andrew: Whatever. Hertfordshire. That’s what I said.

Jamie: Why do Americans have such trouble pronouncing English cities?

Andrew: Because it’s like three words mashed into one. Tom writes:

“Hey, I was on your site looking in the encyclopedia and I came across the characters Bellatrix and Lily. I was wondering who would you think would win in a duel if both of them ever fought?”

Obviously, before Lily died. And I thought that’s a kind of an interesting duel.

[Jamie groans]

Ben: [laughs] No, after she died.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Well, what if… What if Bellatrix – they fought after she died?

Ben: [laughs] Bella’s, Bella’s a nasty witch, that’s for sure.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah, I would, I would happen to agree.

Jamie: But she’s a very powerful nasty person, as well. Even though she’s horrible, she’s very, very powerful. But Lily, you know…

Andrew: And I mean, Lily was good at spells and not much else. So, well, I don’t know that, but…

Laura: That’s not true! She was good at potions! [laughs]

Andrew: What? That’s what I just said! She was good at potions.

Laura: You said spells.

Andrew: I meant potions.

Kevin: You said spells.

Andrew: I meant potions. Laura, what do you think? Who would win in a duel, Bellatrix or Lily?

Laura: I don’t know. I think, I’m trying to decide. It’s really hard because obviously we’ve seen a lot more of Bellatrix in a fighting arena. Well, we haven’t actually seen Lily fight at all, so it’s kind of hard to say. I think that Bellatrix is – I don’t know. I guess a cheater would be the best way to put it. Like, she’s kind of… She’ll go out of her way to trip someone up. She won’t properly duel. Whereas I might see Lily being a bit more…

Andrew: Proper?

Laura: You know what I’m saying? Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah. But if it was a – if it was a formal duel, I would still think Bellatrix would win because, like I just said, Lily is a potions girl, sort of like we were talking about.

Ben: Right, but she’s pretty clever.

Laura: Yeah, but didn’t Ollivander say that her wand was good for charms?

Ben: Well, or hexes. I mean, depends on your interpretation.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Kevin, what do you think?

Kevin: No, I don’t know. I would say I don’t know. We haven’t seen enough of Lily to actually make a judgment on it.

Jamie: Well, we haven’t seen anything of Lily. [laughs]

[Andrew laughs]

Kevin: [laughs} Yeah.

Jamie: She died, remember?

Kevin: Hey, she’s good at jumping in front of things.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: Yeah.


Listener Rebuttal: Proof Snape is NOT Evil


Andrew: Olivia, 17, of Wellington, New Zealand has another rebuttal for us. She writes:

“I was just re-reading Prisoner of Azkaban and something stuck out to me that I had never thought was significant until just now. When Lupin leads his class into the staff room to vanquish the boggart, Snape is the only other person in the room. He says, “Leave the door open, Lupin. I’d rather not witness this.” He goes on to berate Neville, and then leaves the room. Is it possible that Snape doesn’t want to know what Harry’s worst fear is, lest Voldemort somehow extract this knowledge from him? If so, this puts considerable weight behind the ‘Snape is Good’ theory. What Death Eater wouldn’t want to know the chosen one’s worst fear? And I know that Voldy has not returned yet in this part of the story, but Snape knows that he’s still out there and likely to come back sometime. Just wanted to know what you thought.”

Laura: That’s very good.

Jamie: I think, I think it’s an awesome, it’s an awesome sort of bit at the beginning, but I think she’s gone… I mean, this kind of provoked me to think, and I think that instead of it being that Snape doesn’t what to know what Harry’s worst fear is, he doesn’t want to see himself dressed as…

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: …you know, in the clothes.

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: So, perhaps he’s performing Occlumency on Neville. Sorry, he’s performing Legilimency.

Laura: Well, it’s a good theory…

Jamie: Yes.

Laura: …to support the ‘Snape is Good’ camp.

Jamie: Yes, it is. So…

Andrew: I don’t know because…

Jamie: I wouldn’t call it the most solid theory ever, but it’s very good. Yeah

Andrew: It just seems like Snape wouldn’t really care for this sort of thing.

Laura: Yeah, I mean it could be that too.

Andrew: “I’d rather not witness this, I’ve got better things to do.” That’s sort of his attitude all the time, anyway.

Jamie: Yeah, that’s true. That’s true actually, yeah.

Laura: It could go either way.

Kevin: Yeah, it sort of sounds like he’s trying to make it out to be pathetic.

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: You know? Like “Oh, this is pathetic.”

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: “I don’t want to see these kids’ fears.”

Andrew: Thank you Olivia, for sending that in.


Interview: Potter Puppet Pals


Andrew: We have an interview now with the folks who produce Potter Puppet Pals, which is a
funny flash website that produces different Harry Potter skits. Most notably, “Sexy Snape,” which is a flash version of Snape…

Ben: Oh, yeah.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: …”I’m too sexy for my body.” It’s actually really funny. They just released a new video, and we have an interview with them now.

I am now joined by Neil’s Cicierega who is the creator of Potter Puppet Pals. Neil?

Neil: Hey.

Andrew: Thanks for coming on the show today with us. We just had a couple questions for you because you guys just released a new Potter Puppet Pals short. But before I ask you about that, could you tell us a little bit about Potter Puppet Pals and how you originally came up with the idea for it?

Neil: I guess the idea of Harry Potter characters as puppets, something about that stuck out. My sister and some of her friends, I guess, liked to draw comics featuring puppet versions of the Harry Potter characters and it was funny. So I’m like, “I’m going to record their voices and animate them.”

Andrew: Oh, okay.

Neil: I did not – mhm?

Andrew: Did you have experience with doing flash animations beforehand? Or did you learn it just for this?

Neil: I had had some, yeah. Not like really animating. My sister’s the artist – my sister Emmy. She does animations a lot better, but I decided to try my hand at more traditional animation. But I definitely did a lot of stuff in flash before then, but it was a lot more random and less cute.

Andrew: Right. So, are you guys both pretty big Harry Potter fans?

Neil: Yeah, since, I don’t know, 2000 or so. Yeah, for quite a while.

Andrew: Oh, okay. How long does it take you to produce one of these?

Neil: Well, the animations were a lot harder. I actually get them done pretty quick, considering how hard it is to animate.

Andrew: Yeah.

Neil: But by the time… But after I’d made the first two animations, for some reason it got a lot harder to see it all through, so that’s why I never created a third animation. But the puppets, the real puppets? Well, it took a long time to actually make the puppets.

Andrew: Was that your sister, Emmy or who came up with these?

Emmy: Our mom did.

Neil: Oh, yeah, our mom actually made the puppets.

Andrew: Oh, okay. [laughs]

Neil: She’s just the only person who can sew.

Emmy: There’s no way we could have made them.

[Andrew laughs]

Andrew: You guys are just the computer people?

Emmy: Yeah, we’re computer people, not crafty people.

Andrew: Yeah.

Neil: Mhm.

Andrew: Now, one of your bigger, one of your more successful videos – well, I would think – is “Sexy Snape,” as it’s called.

Neil: Yeah, that one’s kind of a runaway hit, I guess.

Andrew: Yeah. How’d you come up with the idea for that?

Emmy: I told him to do it.

Andrew: Oh, did you? [laughs] Did you?

Neil: Yeah, the idea was of Snape dancing to that song.

Emmy: On a runway.

Neil: On a runway.

Andrew: Right.

Neil: I never finished it because I didn’t expect it to be a serious animation, it was just was purely self-amusement. But we stuck it up on the website anyway and some people found it and it spread around on its own.

Andrew: Right. Was that one of your first Potter Puppet Pals?

Neil: Well, I guess it’s not really a puppet video.

Andrew: Well, right, but I mean just one of your first videos.

Neil: I think that came after the Puppet Pals.

Emmy: Yeah.

Neil: I know it looks a lot cruder.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs] Yeah, because the animation of that one is pretty – sort of cheesy, and I think that’s what makes it so funny.

Emmy: Yeah.

Andrew: Is that his mouth is just opening up and down, it’s pretty funny.

Neil: Yeah, I wasn’t trying to go for anything too fancy with that one.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs]

Emmy: It was just different.

Neil: Yeah.

Andrew: Which one are you most proud of, would you say?

Neil: Which one are we most proud of?

Andrew: Yeah.

Neil: Oh, I don’t know. I usually like the latest stuff. I love the live action puppets because they’re really fun to play around with and film and they’re so much easier than animating.

Andrew: Right.

Emmy: What are you talking about? It’s hard holding the puppets.

[Andrew laughs]

Neil: Well, in the last animation I didn’t actually have to hold the puppets up. I got Emmy and our friend Laura – because I wanted to be behind the camera.

Andrew: Uh huh. How long does it take for you guys, usually, to come up with a script for one of these?

Emmy: We just sit down and we write it, like, at three in the morning. It’ll take a couple hours and we’ll find it a couple days after that.

Neil: Yeah.

Emmy: But we’ll mostly just sit down and do whatever makes us laugh the most.

Andrew: Oh, okay. Now, how big – how many views do you get on these videos?

Neil: I’m not sure. I haven’t checked. [laughs] I know the original few animations have probably gotten a lot by now, because – I don’t know.

Emmy: Millions.

Neil: Yeah, I don’t know. I’m not sure of the numbers. I know on New Ground they got several thousand views.

Andrew: Wow.

Neil: A lot of them – yeah. A lot of views came from MuggleNet, actually. Originally.

Andrew: Oh, okay. Yeah. I remember when we posted about that, and still, frequently, we’re always getting e-mails from people telling us to check it out. We’ve been getting a lot of emails lately about your new video called “Wizard Angst.”

Neil: Mhm.

Andrew: Is that what it’s called? Could you tell us about that one? That’s a puppet style video, right?

Neil: I think it’s – technically it’s the third video we’ve made with the puppets. The first was just a little teaser animation with just puppet Snape, sort of staring into the camera while a Cure song played. That was just to get people’s interest.

Andrew: Yeah.

Neil: And let them know that we’re going to make some stuff with real puppets. And then I made a sort of test video, which we didn’t have a stage yet so we filmed it from behind the couch.

[Emmy laughs]

Andrew: Oh, okay.

Neil: That one is called “Potions Class,” and that still gets a lot of views anyways even though it’s…

Emmy: Crappy.

Neil: Yeah. Well, it’s not crappy, it’s still pretty funny. But it’s not full quality. And “Wizard Angst” is the first official episode, and we filmed it with pretty much the completed puppets and a nice stage with curtains and everything, and changing camera shots. It looks really nice.

Andrew: Yeah, I’m looking at it now. It’s… [laughs] It looks very good. Now, you said this is the first of a series of episodes you’re doing?

Neil: Yeah, hopefully. We’re going…

Andrew: Is it – go ahead.

Neil: We’re going to. Every once in a while, we’re just going to be like, “Hey, let’s make a new puppet video.” and we’ll be like okay, and we will write a script, and we’ll go down to the stage and film it.

Andrew: Oh, okay. Now are these – is it going to stretch out across an entire storyline, or are they all different themes to them.

Emmy: They’re just random.

Neil: They’re just random.

Andrew: [laughs] Okay. Now you guys are going to be performing, I guess I could say, at Yule Ball in Massachusetts come December.

Neil: Mhm. Yeah, December 10th at the Middle East in Cambridge. Harry and the Potters are putting on a Yule Ball show. They’re doing two shows on that day, an early one, and a late one, and we’re doing the earlier one, which is around noon. And we’re doing to be opening for them with a whole bunch of Wizard Rock bands.

Emmy: Draco and the Malfoys.

Neil: Yeah, and all those kids.

Andrew: Cool.

Neil: We’ll do an actual skit in front of the audience with the puppets, right there in front of everybody.

Andrew: Very cool. Did you guys come to them with this idea, or did they come to you?

Neil: We came to them, pretty much. After a show when they were all tired and sweaty.

Andrew: Okay [laughs]

Neil: We went up and were like, “Hey. We made Potter Puppet Pals. We’re going to be in your show, okay?”

Andrew: Uh huh.

Neil: They had heard of us. I don’t know if – I’m pretty sure they had seen the videos before, but they told us that they see a lot of people wearing Potter Puppet Pals shirts at their shows, and they said it was a really cool idea for us to open for them at some point, so they got us this gig.

Andrew: Ah, cool.

Neil: There will be more in the future, hopefully.

Andrew: Cool. Is this going to be a new skit, or are you guys going to do one that you’ve already created?

Emmy: It’s going to be new.

Neil: I think we might try – we’ll incorporate a little of old stuff into it, just because it will get big fan reactions, I think.

Andrew: Right.

Neil: But we’re going to try and make it a new skit, and we’re thinking of having little musical segments since it’s a rock show.

Emmy: Yeah.

Neil: And we’re going to have a mini musical, basically.

Andrew: Oh, very cool. Now tell me, who does the voice of Snape? Because it’s probably the…

Neil: That’s me.

Andrew: Is it you? Because it’s probably the funniest voice I’ve ever heard. [laughs]

Emmy: He does all the voices of all the puppets, even Hermione.

Andrew: Oh, you do?

Neil: It’s funny. Usually I pitch Hermione’s voice up just a little bit, but they’re all mine.

Andrew: [laughs] Okay. Can you do a little Snape for us right now?

Neil: [in Snape voice] I suppose I can.

Andrew: [laughs] Can you say, “This is MuggleCast.”

Neil: [in Snape voice] This is MuggleCast.

Andrew: [laughs] Very nice.

Neil: [in Snape voice] The greatest programming on the Internet.

Andrew: [laughs] It’s a very boring tone, I really like it. What’s next for Puppet Pals outside of this little live gig that you guys are doing?

Neil: Oh, I don’t know. I guess we’ll just keep making the videos, trying to spread them out to the world…

Emmy: Keep topping ourselves.

Neil: Keep topping ourselves.

Andrew: Uh huh. Well, you guys are doing a great job, and I know everyone is really enjoying them, and if anyone wants to know more about Potter Puppet Pals, or watch more videos, you can go to PotterPuppetPals.com. Neil and Emily, thanks for – er, Neil and Emmy, thanks for joining us today.

Neil: Thanks.


Dumbledore/Norris Update


Jamie: Okay, Dumbledore/Norris facts will return. I had a few e-mails telling me you want them back, and I had a few good ones being sent in as well. I’m a bit under-prepared, so I’m not going to do any this week, but I’m going to come back next week with an ultra-load of Dumbledore/Norris facts.


Listener Rebuttal: Centaurs


Andrew: We have a final rebuttal now for everyone. Susan, sixteen of Wisconsin. She writes:

“Hey MuggleCasters! I was listening to Episode 63 and I wanted to add something to your Forbidden Forest discussion. When you were talking about the centaurs, you mentioned how they might help Harry in the next book. I don’t think they would help even if they wanted the ‘good’ side to win or vice versa. They don’t believe fate should be tampered with and that’s why they were angry with Firenze for helping Harry in the first book, not because they wanted Harry to die. Of course, you’ll always get the odd one like him that isn’t against affecting the outside world, so there may be a group of them that we see in the seventh book (obviously Firenze can’t go back now), but I think the majority will just want to let time take its course. To them, it’s not right or wrong, it’s fate.

Good point, Susan.

Jamie: Can I point out that she put the word “good” in speech marks to show that even though Harry’s…

Andrew: It’s not…

Jamie: ..side is considered good, it is not…

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: And no, it’s not right or wrong, it’s fate. Thank you Susan, I like you.


Andrew’s McDonald’s Update


Andrew: I have an update on our new McDonald’s listener challenge. It’s going very well. McDonald’s across the world are getting promotional ads for MuggleCast placed in their fine restaurants, and I want to remind everyone that you have until the end of the month to go in there, take a picture of yourself with a MuggleCast promotional sign, whether it’s on the soda fountain or it can be anywhere in McDonald’s, and we got a lot of e-mail complaints about this, because we were limiting it to McDonald’s. You can put it anywhere. I don’t really care.

Jamie: Anywhere.

Andrew: Just promote us. That’s what I’m trying to say.

Ben: Wendy’s?

Andrew: Sure. Yeah. Wendy’s, yeah.

Kevin: Be creative.

Andrew: [laughs] Not your own house. It had to be somewhere out in public where people can see it, because we like getting word out about the show. No harm in that. So you have until the end of the month.

Laura: Yeah, people were complaining because they thought that we were [laughs] being endorsed by McDonald’s or something. It was kind of ridiculous. [laughs]

Andrew: No, of course not. We are.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: Seriously, McDonalds has much higher promotional campaigns like TV, than to use our podcast.

Kevin: They’ve been… Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah. By the way, everyone, I’d like to announce that we are now sponsored by McDonald’s, that’s McDonalds.com.

[Ben, Kevin and Laura laugh]

Andrew: So anyway, you do have until the end of the month to send in your pictures, and we’ll post them for everyone to see. We’re going to give away something. We don’t know what yet. I guess a t-shirt and a free coupon to McDonald’s.

Laura: And a Big Mac.

Andrew: A free cookie fun pack.


Jamie’s British Jokes of the Day


Andrew: Jamie, you want to wrap things up today with a British joke?

Jamie: I do. I’ve got two today.

[Laura and Andrew laugh]

Jamie: First one: There is a family sat in a restaurant when several people burst in riding huge, massive eggs. They ride around the room, but then the eggs smash and the people fall and die. The father says to his kids, “See kids, that’s why you should never mount your chickens before they hatch.”

[Andrew and Laura laughs]

Jamie: That was from…

Andrew: I’m dying here.

Jamie: Richard from London. Well, that was from Richard from London, who, for age, has put 742, so I’m assuming he’s made a typo there, but he could be our oldest listener yet. I would really like that.

Jamie: This is quite hard to get, but see if you like it. A frog walks – you have to listen carefully. A frog walks into a bank and walks up to the clerk. He looks at her name-tag and says, “Hello, Patty Whack. My name is Mr. Jagger, and I’d like a loan.” Patty Whack says, “All right, Mr. Jagger. And what will your collateral be?” The frog puts his hand into his pocket and pulls out a small pink elephant. Patty Whack looks at it for a second, then says, “I’m not sure if we can take that. Will you excuse me for a minute? I’m going to ask the boss.” She tells the boss about the frog and shows him the pink elephant. Her boss looks at her and says, “It’s a knick-knack, Patty Whack, give the frog a loan. His old man’s a Rolling Stone.”

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: That actually – I actually like that one.

Andrew: That’s funny!

Laura: Yeah, that was actually cool. [laughs]

Jamie: Good, I’m glad you do, Ben.

Andrew: Ah, for once.


PO Box Update


Andrew: Ben, you’re going to wrap things up today with a PO Box update I hear?

Ben: [makes a shivering noise] Sorry, I ran outside barefoot and it’s like two degrees, and… Yeah.

Jamie: It’s not, Ben, it’s always warm in America.

Ben: See what I do, what I do for MuggleCast.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Okay.

Andrew: That must have been really hard. [laughs]

Kevin: He’s like shivering!

Ben: From Lisa and

Laura: they said they want to thank me for my good work and everyone on the show for their excellent work, and this letter was addressed to me. It says, “You’re my friend Laura’s favorite.” Hey! Coincidentally enough, I’m this Laura’s favorite too! MuggleCast Laura, I’m her favorite too.

[Andrew and Kevin laugh]

Laura: Oh, yeah! Absolutely.

Ben: It says… And then she says, Lisa says, “I think Andrew’s the best. Sorry, but I love you all.”

Andrew: Thank you, Lisa.

Ben: But something interesting is Laura and Lisa, Lisa and Laura, Lisa and Laura, Laura and Lisa sent me an autographed Yellowcard poster! Now how cool is that?

Andrew: Awww!

Jamie: Awww, that’s very nice.

Ben: It’s personalized! It says – I don’t know if they wrote the “To Ben” on that, but regardless, it’s awesome. It is signed by all the band members, and it says Lights and Sounds. I love you guys. I love you all!

Andrew: Was it really signed by them?

Ben: This is awesome. Yeah! I’m serious! It is!

Kevin: It’s probably forged.

Jamie: Ben…

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: What’s your e-Bay user name?

Andrew: Way to rain on the parade.

Ben: What’s that, Jamie?

Jamie: What’s your e-Bay username? I’ll be checking it closely in the next few days. [laughs]

Ben: [laughs] No, it’s probably personalized. It has my name on it, so…

Jamie: Yeah, but think about it.

Ben: So, thank you.

Andrew: If anyone wants to…

Ben: Just hope another Ben wants a Yellowcard poster or something?

Jamie: Yeah, exactly! Yeah.

[Andrew laughs]

[Show Close music begins]

Ben: Thank you all, though. Seriously. Thank you for everything. Continue sending anything, letters and stuff – I’ll read some letters on the show next week. Those were in my trunk underneath a bunch of boxes. So I – and it was too cold out there for me to get them. So, next week, I’ll read letters.

Andrew: Cool!

Jamie: Awesome.

Andrew: And if anyone wants to send me a poster of U2 with all of their signed autographs…

Jamie: Of U2? [laughs]

Andrew: It doesn’t have to be personally addressed. You don’t have to put my name on it.

Ben: Send it to:
PO Box 223
Moundridge, Kansas 67107

Andrew: You can call us: 1-218-20-MAGIC (62442). I just renewed our phone number, so you guys better use it.

Kevin: Oh, that’s good.

Andrew: It cost us like – what, forty-three dollars? That’s breaking the bank. Everyone use it! [laughs] And if you’re in the United Kingdom, you can call 020-8144-0677. If you’re in Australia, you can dial 02-8003-5668. You can also Skype the username MuggleCast and leave a voicemail question. Speaking of voicemails, Episode 66 we will be doing an entire voicemail show. We’re not going to have a main discussion or anything. We might have little segments still, but it’s just going to be focused on voicemails. We’re going to have a good 10-15 voicemail questions answered to attempt to break ice on the amount of voicemail questions that we do get. So, keep them coming, and make them good questions! [laughs] Please. Also, you can listen at MuggleCast.com and use our feedback form to get in touch with anyone of us. You can also complain about the show, you can make a suggestion, you can give us a submission; tell us if you have trouble downloading MuggleCast. It’s all there on the site. And don’t forget to visit our MySpace! We want 5,000 friends. That’s our goal. We’re going to do something.

Ben: By tomorrow.

Kevin: Well, I…

Andrew: That’s doable.

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: There’s how many people on MySpace? 54 million? [laughs] So once again, I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I am Ben Schoen.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Kevin: I’m Kevin Steck.

Laura: And I’m Laura Thompson.

Andrew: We’ll see everyone next week for MuggleCast Episode 65, with a special interview with the creators of the Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix video game. So it’ll be a show you don’t want to miss. Buh-bye!

[Show music ends]


Bloopers


Kevin: No, all I’m saying is that if you are addicted to something, like alcohol in Laura’s case, and you…

[Everyone laughs]

Kevin: No, no, I’m sorry, not – in Laura’s example, I should say. In her example!

Andrew: Oh, okay.

Jamie: [laughs] That was funny. Put that in.


Micah: USA Today published four brand new photos from the Order of the Phoenix movie in an article which also contains a new interview with Dan Radcliffe. The photos show Voldemort, Sirius, Umbridge, and Harry and Cho kissing.

Now I’m going to share a story with you about USA Today, and you have no choice but to listen. I was at work on Friday. I went to MuggleNet.com. Not that I ever condone going to non-related sites when you’re at work, but nonetheless, I did. And I saw that these pictures were in the paper that day, and so I decided, “On the way home, I’m going to pick up USA Today and I’m going to take a look at these pictures.” And I leave early from work, get to the train, and completely forget to pick up the paper! Now, as luck would have it, what do you think happened? The whole reason behind telling this story – not to waste your time – I get into the train, I go to sit down, and what is sitting on my seat, but USA Today. If that’s not fate, I don’t know what is!

———————–

Written by: Micah, Allison, Briana, Jessica, Judy, Mandie, Martina, Matt, Megan, Roni, Samantha, Sarah, Shannon and Shelly

Transcript #63

MuggleCast 63 Transcript


Show Intro


Andrew: Get $96.00 in free extras from your domain name from GoDaddy.com. Each domain includes free hosting with a website builder, a free blog, complete email and much more. Plus, as a MuggleCast listener just enter code “Muggle” when you checkout and save an additional ten percent on any order. Some restrictions apply, see site for details. Get your own piece of the internet today at GoDaddy.com.

[Show Intro music]

Andrew: Because Tuesday is an important day for all fans of the show, this is MuggleCast Episode 63 for November 12, 2006.

[More show intro music]


Pickle Appreciation Day


Andrew: Did you guys know Tuesday, November 14th is National Pickle Day?

Laura: I did not.

Jamie: Can’t say I did.

Andrew: Really? Why not? It’s like a big national holiday.

Jamie Yeah.

Andrew: Actually, it’s – sorry it’s Pickle Appreciation Day.

Jamie: Sorry, who created this? Who created…

Laura: We don’t eat pickles in Georgia.

Andrew: I don’t know, Jamie, I don’t know. I tried to look it up and I couldn’t find any information on it.

Jamie: The American Pickle Society.

Andrew: Someone emailed in and then I went on – they gave me a link to a greeting card website, you know where you can send greeting cards for like holidays?

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: And there is one for Pickle Appreciation Day. So, we’ll provide the link in the show notes and everyone can go send each other Pickle Appreciation Day e-cards via e-mail.

Jamie: Which you’ll all want to do, definitely.

Andrew: Yeah, and please send some to mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com. So I hope everyone is going to be celebrating, I know I am.

Jamie: Oh yeah.

Ben: And eating a lot of pickles.

Andrew: I will be eating various assortments of pickles that day and…

Laura: Well, you know…

Ben: Raise your hand if you like pickles.

Andrew: I’m raising my hand, Ben, over here.

Jamie: I’m half raising my hand. It’s a love-hate thing.

Ben: I hate them.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Actually, no, I’m kidding I really hate the taste of them, they’re bad.

Ben: Like, when I get a hamburger, I just have it plain – just cheese.

Andrew: Yeah, me too. Ketchup only.

Ben: Yeah, ketchup – ketchup only.

Laura: Oh, no, I love pickles on my hamburgers. They’re good.

Eric: No, yeah – pickles on a cheeseburger. I only eat pickles if they…

Jamie: Ben, are you the kind of person who goes to McDonald’s and is like, “Yeah, please can I have a Big Mac, but please can I not have cheese…”

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: “…but please can I have extra mayonnaise, but please can I have no pickles.”

Ben: No, no, no, I say, “can I…”

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: I think I’m going to say, “Can I get a cheeseburger plain?”

Jamie: Ben?

Ben: Then I apply my own ketchup later.

Eric: It takes them significantly longer though…

Jamie: Of course it does, of course it does.

Eric: …Ben, I just pull off the pickles.

Andrew: Speaking of McDonald’s, we have a special new listener challenge later in the show that is going to change the way we all visit McDonalds. I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Eric: I am Eric Scull.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

[More show intro Music]

Jamie: Hey Ben, can you walk into Subway and just say “Yeah, I’ll have my usual?”

Ben: I used to be able to, but I haven’t been to Subway in months.

Jamie: Really?

Ben: Because I told people to stop sending me cards because I felt so bad.

Laura: I went to Subway in New York City.

Jamie: I love Subway.

Ben: Well, yeah, you traveled 3,000 miles to go to Subway.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Speaking of New York City [laughs], that was the only seg-way I could think of, Micah Tannenbaum is in our imaginary MuggleCast News Center with the past week’s top Harry Potter news stories.


News


Micah: Earlier this week we reported that Michael Hoffman was slated to direct the sixth Potter film. WB has now confirmed that this is not true, however Production Weekly’s latest issue contains information concerning Half Blood Prince, including that David Yates is set to direct the film. While everyone should consider this a rumor for now, we heard that David has been in talks with WB.

Emma Thompson, who plays Professor Sibyl Trelawney, was interviewed on Jonathan Ross where she mainly discussed her new film Stranger Than Fiction while speaking a little about Harry Potter. A video of this appearance can be seen over at Mugglenet.com and Emma also did interviews with Newsweek, USA Today, and made an appearance on The Ellen Show.

Jason Isaacs, the Lucius Malfoy actor, appeared on the UK chat show This Morning, where he discussed the Potter films, mentioned that he finished filming his scenes for Order of the Phoenix last week.

In a recent interview Daniel Radcliffe was asked if he would be playing a death in Movie Seven, and he suggested that Harry might die in the final book. He was quoted as saying, “That’s the only way JK Rowling could ever halt any call for her to keep writing the Potter books, because I mean if Harry survives she’ll just be getting plagued by requests to write an eighth book for the rest of her life.”

In celebration of their 60th publication anniversary Time Europe reflected on the heroes that have immerged in the past six decades. Jo Rowling made the list, along with dozens of other inspirational figures.

And according to a poll by hotel company Travelodge, Jo has the fifth biggest fan base in the United Kingdom. The Harry Potter author ranks behind Manchester United, pop star Robbie Williams, and the Liverpool Football Club. I hear Andrew is crying U2 didn’t make the list, but Andrew, don’t worry this is after all poll by a hotel company.

As we reported last month the American Library Association asked teen readers to vote for their favorite book as part of Teen Read Week. The Association has announced the winners and, no doubt due to MuggleNetters voting, Half Blood Prince topped the list.

Leslie Phillips, voice of the Sorting Hat, joins the guest line-up for Collector Mania G-Mex, scheduled to take place in Manchester, England, between the 18th and 19th of November. Jamie Waylett, who plays Vincent Crabbe and James and Oliver Phelps, who play the Weasley twins, are also set to attend.

Finally, there is no more waiting: the first copies of the book written entirely by MuggleNet staff are now being shipped by our partner Alivan’s. MuggleNet.com’s What Will Happen in Harry Potter 7? can be ordered for just $15.84 (shipping included). That’s all the news for this November 12th, 2006 edition of MuggleCast. Back to the show.

Andrew: All right, thanks Micah. And anyone who’s wondering about that chipmunk voice was real, that he did on the show last week? It is legit because Eric and I had him do it in New York City when they were hanging out with him…

Ben: [laughs] Did you really?

Andrew: …earlier this week. Yeah and he did it.

Ben: That’s awesome.

Andrew: I couldn’t believe him at first because I thought he might have just done a little effect, you know to accent or something, but no, it’s legit.


News Discussion: U.K. Fan Bases


Andrew: Not much news to discuss this week. There were a lot news stories but none of them are really discussion worthy. Here’s something I found interesting. J.K. Rowling ranked #5 in the Top Ten, I think it was, U.K. Fan bases. Now, what…

Ben: Oh, what a load.

Andrew: What immediately struck me about this was that wouldn’t you think that Jo probably has one of the bigger fan bases. Jamie, did you see this list? Because I wanted to ask you about it.

Jamie: No, I didn’t. No.

Ben: Who’s number one? Lord of the Rings?

Andrew: No

Jamie: No

Andrew: No, these are like people…

Ben: Star Trek? Oh, these are people’s fan bases.

Andrew: The Top U.K. Fan bases: #1 was Manchester United.

Laura: What?

Eric: What is Manchester United?

Ben: That’s a team.

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: It’s a football team.

Laura: That’s stupid.

Jamie: It’s a huge, huge, huge football team.

Ben: Football? What are you talking about they’re a soccer team.

Andrew: Foosball

Jamie: Oh, I’m sorry Ben. Yes, it’s a soccer team. It is massive. It is absolutely massive.

Andrew: #2: Robbie Williams. Who’s a pop star?

Jamie: Yeah, he is. I don’t know if I’d call what he has as a massive fan base…

Ben: Isn’t that the guy who plays Hagrid?

Jamie: No…

Laura: No, [laugh]

Jamie: That’s Robbie Coltrane, Ben.

Ben: Oh, [laughs] woops.

Jamie: This guy does have a great deal of fans and all of his concerts are sold out very, very, very early on. But I don’t know. Who came third?

Andrew: How about Liverpool – Liverpool F.C.

Jamie: Soccer Club, again.

Andrew: Football club.

Eric: Where is Sir Elton John’s fan base?

Ben: The Beatles.

Jamie: Soccer Club again. There… Yeah, they all have huge – the football clubs do have huge fan bases.

Andrew: Now, what about, something called Arsenal? What’s that?

Jamie: One more football club. Sorry, soccer club.

Eric: Oh my God!

Andrew: Geez, that’s stupid.

Eric: These crazy sports fans. You can’t even compare them.

Jamie: Footballs massive. It’s massive. Absolutely massive.

Andrew: Well, soccer in the U.S. is not very big at all.

Jamie: No, I know its not.

Ben: No, we hate it here.

Andrew: We don’t hate it. Some people do.

Ben: No, I hate it. It’s too much running. I can’t do it.

[Ben and Eric laughs]

Andrew: And then there’s J.K. Rowling and #6, really disappointed me, U2.

Laura: Awww…

Andrew: Come on.

Eric: Well, No. I don’t even understand why they’re comparing that to kids and…

Andrew: To soccer clubs?

Eric: The people that actually read, you know, and don’t just drink and watch sports channel.

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Well, I think it’s a bit of a stereotype to make, you know? You can’t say that all football fans drink and watch it.

Eric: Oh, yes it is and forgive me for making the stereotype…

Jamie: Never, never.

Eric…if it’s possible, but…

Jamie: Never, never.

[Eric and Ben laughs]

Eric: But I’m saying sports fans are quite a bit different from these kinds of fans and I don’t know, you know? It’s not exactly like they don’t like the same exact things. I think it’s like they should have done a list of something different. I don’t know.

Andrew: This poll was conducted by a hotel over in England.

Jamie: What’s the… Oh, well they’re experts so…

Ben: A little hotel.

Andrew: Yeah, I mean, I know.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: I know. Well, it made the BBC, so it’s somewhat newsworthy.


Order of the Phoenix Teaser Trailer


Andrew: I got another question for everyone. Who is going to see Happy Feet this Friday?

Eric: I am going to see Casino Royale.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Okay, but my question is who is going to see Happy Feet.

Ben: Well,

[Andrew, Jamie and Ben laughs]

Jamie: Back to the original question.

Ben: What’s that movie going to be about? It sounds dumb.

Andrew: It’s about penguins dancing on ice glaciers.

Laura: Oh, that will be…

Jamie: Classic.

Laura: …That’ll be my number one stop this weekend, I’m telling you that now.

Jamie: Absolute classic.

Andrew: No, okay. You know why I’m asking this…

Laura: Yes.

Andrew: Order of the Phoenix teaser trailer.

Laura: Yes, I know.

Eric: I’ll catch the trailer Andrew.

Andrew: Attached to the front of this. Eric, you work at Happy Feet – you work at the movie theater.

Ben: [laughing] He works at Happy Feet.

Jamie: He works on a glacier.

Andrew: Yeah, what were you going to say, Ben?

Ben: How long do you think it is until we got a version of it online? Someone sends in…

Andrew: I’m going to guess two minutes after Happy Feet is released.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: Okay, I’m going to go to the movie theater. I’m going to buy a ticket to a movie I actually want to see, then I’m going to go to the previews of Happy Feet and then [laughs].

Andrew: Then switch, yeah.

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: That’s a good idea

Eric: I could stop you. I could kick you out, Ben.

Ben: Oh, could you?

Eric: If you came to my theater.

Ben: If we go to Philadelphia’s theater.

Eric: No, if you come to Redding, Pennsylvania.

Ben: Redding.

[Andrew laughs]

Eric: If you came to my theater.

Andrew: The trailer has been seen by a few people and there have been some descriptions online and from what we can gather they’re pretty accurate. Have you guys read them?

Ben: No

Laura: I’ve read one.

Andrew: Looks pretty good.

Laura: Yeah

Andrew: Starts with Sirius…

Eric: Don’t tell me. Spoiler policy – spoiler.

Jamie: Yeah, you shouldn’t say it, to be honest.

Andrew: All right, all right, I won’t, I won’t – never mind. It starts with Sirius talking and that’s all I’ll say. And, so I guess I’ll be going to… I don’t know it doesn’t seem like – it doesn’t seem worth it since it’s going to be online.

Ben: Is it worth the drive?

Jamie: But we don’t…

Andrew: Yeah, with the gas prices these days.

Jamie: …But we don’t condone seeing it online, if it’s been leaked do we Andrew?

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: Well, I do. Because…

Jamie: Yeah, right.

Andrew: …if it’s on YouTube, it’s not a problem.

Eric: Allegedly. Allegedly

Jamie: Allegedly, it’s on YouTube.

Andrew: But yeah, it wouldn’t surprise me if it shows up on Apple officially. Maybe the same day…

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Because t just seems…

Jamie: It’s easier to put it out online

Andrew: …kind of hard for WB.

Jamie: Instead of like risking piracy. If they actually put it online. Then they’re beating the pirates. [laughs] Do…

Andrew: Right, right.

Jamie: Do you call people who pirate stuff pirates?

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Internet Pirates.

Ben: Well, duh. Yeah.

Jamie: Well, that doesn’t sound right.

Ben: Argh….

Jamie: I can imagine…

Eric: Well neither does pirate [pronounced “pi-rate”].

Jamie: Pi-rate.

Ben: Yeah [laughs].

Jamie: Yeah, true.

Eric: What is the etymology of pirate [pronounced “pi-rate”]. I mean, it’s just…

Ben: [laughs] Pirate [pronounced “pi-rate”].

Jamie: It’s from the Latin “pir,” meaning…

[Eric laughs]

Jamie: …steal, and “rate,” meaning…videos?

[Eric laughs]

Jamie: Actually, I have no idea.

Eric: [still laughing] Rate.


MuggleCast T-Shirts


Andrew: Folks, we haven’t been kidding. MuggleCast t-shirts will no longer be sold after – well, beginning January 1st, 2007.

Ben: They’re going out of style.

Andrew: So – not, oh, no. They’ll always be in style, but the shirts, we’ll have to take them off the website January 1st, so if you are thinking about buying a shirt, we urge you purchase one now because they are going to be selling out fast [clears throat] and we hope to sell out our entire inventory. Of course, they help to support the show and… So thank you very much.

Eric: You know what we need? We need hoodies and then we need to say, you know, “Keep yourself warm, this will be the last winter you’ll have an opportunity to keep yourself warm,” or something.

Andrew: And, of course, you all need to buy one for National MuggleCast Day, coming this…May?

Laura: June.

Eric: You mean MuggleCast T-Shirt Day?

[Ben laughs]


Podcast Alley


Andrew: June. I always forget. [laughs] And then, also, don’t forget to vote for us on Podcast Alley. We really need everyone’s votes over there because we want to beat a little podcast called Keith and The Girl.

Ben: Oh, yeah.

Eric: Who’s the girl?

Andrew: They’re these two – these two big dorks who…

Eric: [laughs] I don’t think…

Andrew: …podcast about nothing.

Eric: …we can call anybody dorks.

Jamie: Yeah. Like us, really, isn’t it? [laughs]

Laura: Yeah, we are.

Andrew: [laughs] No, we’re not dorks.

Eric: We podcast about nothing.

Andrew: We’re cool.


MuggleNet.com’s Book


Ben: Hey, also, now is the time to order MuggleNet.com’s What Will Happen in Harry Potter Seven: Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Falls in Love, and How the Adventure Finally Ends, by Ben Schoen, Emerson Spartz, Jamie Lawrence, Andy Gordon…

Andrew: That’s me.

Ben: …and Gretchen Stull. So, go pick it up.

Andrew: Andy Gordon is my penname.

Ben: [laughs] Shut up.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: It is not. For the tenth time, it’s not.

Andrew: If you would like me to sign it, just please send your copies to the PO Box.

Ben: Yes, remember, this is going to be in your retail stores very soon. It’s going to be in your local Barnes and Noble and Borders. However, if you want to pre-order it online, you can visit MuggleNet, there’s a link on the right side of the page. Yeah. Go ahead and pre-order it.

Jamie: If you guys had pen names…

Andrew: Well, I would have Andy Gordon because that’s my…

Jamie: No, really, what would you have, Andrew? If you didn’t – okay, if you weren’t Andy Gordon.

Andrew: Bono! I would be Bono. [laughs]

Jamie: Hey, hasn’t someone used that before? I can’t – I can’t remember who.

[Andrew coughs]

Jamie: I’m sure I’ve heard that.

Ben: Paul?

Jamie: Ben, what would you be?

Andrew: Bono. Paul Houston.

Jamie: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: Now, let me ask you something. If I go to my bookstore, do I have to say to these people, “I want MuggleNet.com’s What Will Happen in Harry Potter Seven: Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Falls in Love and How Will the Adventure Finally End?“?

Jamie: Yes, you have to.

Ben: You have to say the full title.

Andrew: Can I just say…

Jamie: If you get one word wrong…

Andrew: Can I just say, “What Will Happen in Harry Potter Seven?”?

Ben: You can say, “What Will Happen in Harry Potter Book Seven?”.

Jamie: Andrew, if you get one word wrong, then they tell you…

Ben: They don’t have it.

Jamie: …they don’t have it.

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: You have to get it precisely right, with exactly the right pitch, intonation, and tone in your voice. If you get it wrong…

Eric: It sounds like a sell out book.

Andrew: I should hope so.

Jamie: I should hope so, too.


MuggleCast Variety Show


Ben: [in a goofy voice] The MuggleCast Variety Hour. [laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah. And a little announcement here. The week of New Year’s, it should be like, New Year’s Eve, I think? I don’t know, I would have to consult a calendar, but that last week of the year, we will be having a special MuggleCast variety show that is going to be made up of segments and musical stuff made entirely by the audience. And everyone might remember that we had a segment contest where listeners would create their own MuggleCast segments, and we used about five of them, we ran them for five weeks, but we didn’t – we have like, 20 to 30 more that we never used, so we’re going to use a few of those. And we’ve been getting different submissions lately, like little songs, like little MuggleCast remixes of discussions we’ve had, so I’m going to save all of them for this variety show. So, what I’m asking – what we’re asking here, is for everyone to send in any remixes or segments that you’ve ever had an idea for, for MuggleCast, and we will try to include them on that variety show coming later this year, and it should be a fun show. And the reason we’re going to be doing that is because we won’t be around. Send your entries to mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com. Maybe we’ll give away t-shirts, too, to everyone who airs – who has their segment aired, I don’t know.

Ben: Well, hopefully we won’t have any extras left.

Jamie: Because you’ve all been buying…

Andrew: Yes. Yes.

Jamie: …your MuggleCast t-shirts.


Blog Updates


Andrew: Yes. True that. Oh, and one final reminder on MuggleCast.com – the all new MuggleCast.com now…

Ben: Well, only… Okay, it’s been new for about two months, So… [laughs]

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: It’s still new to me. It’s not two months, it’s been like a month. Yeah.

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: We have weekly roundups now, to cover some of your listener rebuttals that we do not air on the show. And we’ll post them on the website, so we encourage everyone to check the website about midweekly. They’ll be released by one of the co-hosts who were on the past week’s show.


Main Discussion: The Forbidden Forest


Andrew: This week, we are going to have a discussion about the Forbidden Forest. It’s one aspect of Hogwarts that we really haven’t talked about much.

Eric: Maybe at all.

Andrew: Maybe at all. I don’t think we’ve talked about it much at all.

Eric: Wait, not too much, seriously. Maybe two or three episodes we might have mentioned it.

Andrew: No. But there are a few questions about it that we wanted to discuss today.

Eric: I have one before the first one.

Andrew: Oh, okay.

Eric: If that’s okay.

Andrew: Go for it.


Forbidden Forest vs. Dark Forest


Eric: Do you guys know that sometimes Dumbledore refers to the Forbidden Forest as the Dark Forest? Several other characters, like…

Laura: I thought that was just a movie-ism.

Eric: In addition to a movie-ism, I think it appears once or twice in the books, actually. Like, where…

Laura: I don’t think so.

Eric: Yeah. I’m dead serious! It’s not just, you know…

Andrew: Well, do you have evidence to back this up? Or…?

Eric: I don’t, but I’m just saying is it likely that the forest is – the actual name is Forbidden Forest or is it Dark Forest? Or… There seems to be some kind of confusion.

Andrew: I think it is the Forbidden Forest, but – because that is probably the way it was originally described in the books, right?

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: Oh yeah, definitely. Yeah.

Andrew: It’s like the first reference to it was Dark Forest, and then …

Laura: Yep.

Andrew: Although, well, I don’t know.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: You make a good point, because why would they call it the Forbidden Forest? Just because…

Eric: If it’s only forbidden to students…

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: …on one side of it. On one side of one of the edges of it.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Because…

Andrew: That could be the name just for Hogwarts students.

Jamie: Yeah. I think so.


Why is it Forbidden?


Laura: Well, that’s not necessarily true. It’s forbidden because it’s dangerous.

Andrew: Yes.

Laura: And there are things in it that are forbidden, like illegal creatures, like Aragog and his children.

Eric: Well, centaurs wouldn’t be too appreciative to know that they are in…

Jamie: Illegal, yeah.

Eric: …in a forest that is… Well, actually, I think they would.

Laura: Well, that’s not true, though, because…

Eric: I think they would, because…

Laura: They would consider their domain forbidden to…

Eric: Yeah, that’s true.

Laura: …outside people.


Back to Forbidden Forest vs. Dark Forest


Eric: Well, in Movie One Dumbledore – Richard Harris – says, “Please note that the Dark Forest is forbidden.” You’re right, that could be a movie-ism. But I was sure then around Book Five or Book Six, maybe even Book Four when they were doing the tasks kind of near there, I was under the impression that they used Dark Forest once or twice more, so I thought I would ask.

Laura: Well, I could be wrong, but I really don’t think so.

Ben: I don’t think so either.

[Laura and Eric laugh]

Ben: I think they either refer to it as the Forest or the Forbidden Forest. The chapter in the book is called, “The Forbidden Forest.”

Jamie: Yeah.

Laura: And they use the word… And they use the word “dark” a lot in the movies, too. If you’ll notice the tower where Sirius was, was the Dark Tower in the Prisoner of Azkaban movie.

Eric: Dark Tower?

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: What are they trying to do? Just set a dark tone to it, make it sound even more eerie?

Laura: Yeah.


Adventures in the Forbidden Forest


Andrew: I mean, it seems like one of those places that is lacking a major adventure. They’ve always gone in there to, you know, in Book Five, check up on…

Eric: I disagree.

Andrew: You don’t think so?

Eric: The first year Harry goes in there with, you know, and almost gets killed by this Voldemort slither thingy, and then centaurs have to save him, but they get mad at each other. Second year, a giant spider sends all of his thousand younglings all over it – all over after Harry and Ron. And the Ford Anglia has been living there for four or five years.

Laura: Ummm, no, Eric. [laughs]

Eric: Third year at the edge of it the Whomping Willow nearly kills everybody, and everybody sub-passes it. Fourth year, there’s dragons being trained. What do you mean lacking in big adventure? The fourth year there were dragons being hidden there. The fifth year… [laughs]

Jamie: How would you hide a dragon? Just go into that quickly.

[Eric continues to laugh]

Jamie: It must be hard to hide a dragon.

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: The forest must be extremely dense and sort of dark. And, you know? Well…

Andrew: Yeah, exactly. So, it’s very easy to hide a dragon.

Jamie: Yeah. Well, no, I don’t think it’s easy. I don’t think it’s ever easy to hide a dragon. But I think it’s helpful, the fact that…

Ben: Unless it’s baby dragon.

Jamie: It could be. That could be it.

Andrew: Well…

Jamie: Or it could be mute so it can’t speak or breath fire. So, it’s easy.

Andrew: Hagrid held Grawp in there pretty easily.

Ben: Well, last time I checked, Grawp wasn’t a dragon.

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: Well, no, I know that, but he was making a big scene in the forest and no one really ever noticed.

Eric: It was far enough off. See, that’s why I don’t want to see a big adventure in the forest. It’s always like – Jo writes in this long paragraph, long section of paragraphs, where they’re walking into the woods, and the scenery is changing. Then there’s always a clearing. So, so far in it gets silent. I’m not saying it’s boring to read about it, because it’s not, but we’ve had several adventures in the Forbidden Forest. I don’t think it needs any bit more exposure than it’s already had.

Jamie: But it needs to be explained.

Eric: It’s supposed to remain mysterious.

Jamie: Perhaps, or it needs to be explained. Because we don’t know anything actually about it. Apart from… It’s been used as a plot point, but it’s been used as a secondary plot point. There’s never been a story-line involving the Forbidden Forest.

Andrew: Right.


Dumbledore’s Relationship with the Centaurs


Jamie: Things have taken place there, and things have happened in there, and revolving around it, but they need to talk about who created it, who can go in there safely. I wonder if Dumbledore can go in there safely. Obviously, he can protect himself, but do – will the centaurs welcome him with open arms?

Andrew: Well, he’s dead now…

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: …so I don’t think it’s a good question. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, he probably couldn’t go walking in, could he?

Eric: [laughs] The centaurs attended his funeral, so I would say they respect him enough, at least as a headmaster…

Jamie: Perhaps, yeah.

Eric: … to maybe… Well, he had to go in there and rescue Umbridge from the centaurs. So, not only did he [laughs] have to be on good terms with the centaurs, maybe speaking, but he had to convince them to let Umbridge go.

Andrew: I think they were upset with him because he took Firenze from them.

Eric: Well, yeah, they could…

Laura: Well, he didn’t… No, I don’t think they were – I don’t think he took Firenze. Firenze kind of…

Eric: Yeah, I think they’re more upset with Firenze.

Andrew: Well, I mean…

Laura: Firenze.

Andrew: But Dumbledore asked him to go. So…

Eric: Yeah.

Andrew: …Dumbledore doesn’t really – I guess. Hmmm, well, I don’t know.

Eric: No, it makes sense…

Andrew: You could say that Dumbledore…

Eric: …because he did take him in.

Andrew: That shows that Dumbledore doesn’t really have any respect for the rest of the them if he’s asking Firenze to go. Unless he just didn’t know the fellow centaurs would be upset by that.

Eric: Hmmm.

Jamie: I agree. I think that’s a good point, actually.


Who Can Go Into the Forbidden Forest?


Andrew: What about Hagrid? Do you think he’s the only one who really goes in there?

Ben: Probably.

Andrew: We know Fred and George have…

Jamie: No, yeah, he did…

Andrew: …taken multiple trips in there, which we’ll talk about in a minute.

Jamie: I think he does, but it’s like he seems to be at home in that type of environment, you know? I think he can handle himself very well, even…

Ben: It seems to be a place of outcasts, too, sort of. You know?

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Like Aragog, you tell him that he can’t be…

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: You can’t live… If that makes any sense.

Eric: That’s a good point. You can’t live in a cupboard, so…

Jamie: But…

Andrew: Who else might go in there to possibly use the Forbidden Forest, maybe? Hide something of their own? Could there really be anyone else who has the courage or the…


How Big is the Forbidden Forest?


Jamie: How big is it? Is it a huge forest or is it just a small one?

Laura: That’s always the impression I’ve gotten, that it was…

Jamie: What, huge?

Andrew: Huge, yeah.

Laura: It was very vast.

Jamie: Well, there must be other things in there. It’s like we kind of expect to be the only people alive in this universe.

Andrew: Speaking of that…

Jamie: We shouldn’t expect that spiders and centaurs are the only people who live in the forest. What? And unicorns.


Tangent: Andrew’s Nightmare


Andrew: I had a nightmare last night.

Jamie: Yeah?

Andrew: So, I went to Vegas to help my dad with something, and the sixth war had begun, and these people from outside of our world started bombing Vegas…

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: No, that really happened.

Andrew: …with these giant laser things. I’m not – I’m really not making this up.

Jamie: That really happened. It really happened.

Eric: Somebody read this kid a book.

Andrew: It was very scary and I woke up almost crying.

Jamie: Awww.

[Eric laughs]

Jamie: And then you realized you were safe in your bed.

Andrew: But anyway, so that was my dream, so I think that does mean that there are other creatures in outside space.


Who is Using the Forbidden Forest?


Andrew: But back to the Forbidden Forest. Yes, like Jamie said, it is very vast. Can anyone else be possibly using it? [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, basically.

Ben: Of course.

Andrew: Anyone at Hogwarts?

Ben: They could, but I don’t know if we have anything in the books that would lead us to believe that.

Eric: As far as Hogwarts goes, like, certain teachers may go in there to get some materials.

Andrew: Well, what about Snape?

Eric: Oh, maybe.

Andrew: Eric, what do you think about Snape?

Eric: When he has to go refill his potion ingredients, maybe some of that would only be collectible in the Forest.

Andrew: Ah yes, yes.

Eric: And Snape’s been – Snape’s gone in there before to visit Quirrell, actually, or to scare Quirrell off or whatever. Snape seemed to know a place in the Forest where…

Jamie: But, Eric, there’s a difference between going in and going in, if that makes sense. You can go onto the outskirts and talk, but…

Eric: Yes, I understand that, but at least Snape was comfortable enough with what was inside. Or he didn’t fear what was inside the Forest enough to go on the outskirts and not fear either being overheard or…He just wanted to take Quirrell into a secluded place.

Jamie: I guess so.

Eric: And it was in the Forest. So, I could see Snape going into the Forest to get potion ingredients and things. And for that, I would imagine you would need to go in pretty far. If you needed, like, Wormwood or something.

Jamie: Unicorn stuff.

Eric: Yeah, unicorn something.


Fred and George in the Forbidden Forest


Andrew: So, what about Fred and George? Because, as I said earlier, I think…

Eric: Where don’t – honestly, I’m sorry to cut you off – where don’t Fred and George go?

Andrew: Well, that’s a good point, but why do you think they’re going in there, Eric?

Eric: Why do you think? Why do you think?

Ben: They’re just mischievous.

Eric: Didn’t you say they go in there?

Jamie: Ingredients for their Skiving Snackboxes.

Andrew: Yeah. Well, that’s the only thing I can think of. They’re going in there to collect stuff for their business.

Eric: They must know where to collect it.

Ben: Well, I doubt they’d go in there anymore.

Andrew: Well, they left the school…

Jamie: But it seems like the kind of place they’d be intrigued by. I doubt they haven’t been in there. I mean, I doubt they…

Eric: Oh, yeah.

Jamie: And didn’t Hagrid say in Book One that he spent half his life chasing the Weasley brothers out of there?

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: That’s very clever, yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: That’s true, and it’s something with the name. [laughs] It’s named, “Forbidden.” [laughs]

Jamie: Which means they want to do it, yeah.

Eric: [laughs] How can they not go in it?


Is There a Horcrux in the Forbidden Forest?


Andrew: What about the possibility of there being a Horcrux in there? Do you guys… Does anyone think there’s any truth to that?

Jamie: No.

Andrew: Since Voldemort has made trips into there – in there for Unicorn’s blood?

Jamie: It’s too much of an open place. Everyone can go in there.

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: I mean, even though he can protect it, there could – I mean, there could just be things walking past, whereas the Cave you aren’t going to go in there and find a queue of people waiting to get in. It’s like, it is a secluded place.

Eric: Right, you can’t even get down those rocks, according to Dumbledore, without magic…

Andrew: Well, but…

Eric: …anymore. Anymore, you can’t really get down.

Andrew: …since the Forest is such a big place, don’t you think it would be
easy to hide a Horcrux? Nobody would ever find that.

Laura: Well yeah, but it’s still open to all the elements, not to mention the
numerous creatures walking around in there.


Tangent: Could Voldemort Have Attached Himself to a Horcrux?


Eric: I wonder why Voldemort, when he was in his little spectral form, didn’t try and go attach himself to one of his Horcruxes, or the soul inside his Horcrux, or something along those lines.

Jamie: I don’t think you can, can you?

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: No, he was. That little spectral form was the Horcrux.

Eric: Was a part of his – was a Horcrux, right.

Jamie: Eric, Eric, it’s just your soul, though. Even if he got all of his Horcruxes when he was in a spectral form together and put them together with his current soul, he would still only be a soul.

Laura: Yeah, he didn’t have a body.

Jamie: He can’t store his body in a cupboard.

Eric: He would still only be a soul, but slightly more of one. He would be
slightly more powerful, he would slightly be more…

Jamie: No, that’s not true. As Dumbledore says, his magical ability and power is still intact even without a soul. I’d say that a soul has more metaphysical, moral, ethical properties. It teaches you right and wrong, stuff like that. It’s a violation of nature to get rid of it, but you can still be magically powerful without it, which is why when Harry comes to fight Voldemort, he will still need absolute mastery of magic to defeat him.

Eric: Right. Right, right, right.

Jamie: In fact, even more, really, because Voldemort is completely malicious in his goals. He doesn’t care about any type of morals at all, whereas Harry, since he has a soul, does. So, you know?


The Forbidden Forest in Book Seven


Andrew: What about come Book Seven? Who could be left in the Forest to help
Harry? Do you think the centaurs could?

Eric: I don’t think it’s likely.

Laura: Well, why not, though, Eric? Because they’ve really stressed that
magical unity is one of the only ways they’re going to be able to defeat
Voldemort.

Eric: Yeah, but who listens to that crap?

Ben: Right, I just don’t foresee them – I don’t understand why we have to have
everything involved, like, what’s Dobby’s role going to be?

Laura: Well, not everything involved. No, not every magical creature, every
magical person is going to unite in the war against Voldemort, but I think
some will.

Eric: Right, but is it… But what it comes down to, with centaurs joining humans, is
whether or not… According to the centaurs humans are very ignorant, they
think they’re animals, the sky’s the limit with the complaints that they
have. It’s just a matter… The centaurs have read the stars, and they’re
very content. We’ve seen them. They’re very content in knowing that there’s
going to be not just another war, but that humans are going to die. I don’t
even think they concern themselves with this war unless something really big happens. Or, or you can believe that they will say, “Okay, we are the insightful people, the humans need us, let’s go help.”


Tangent: The Ford Anglia’s Appearance


Eric: But I don’t personally see that as likely, and I think that the only thing that’s going to help Harry in the Forbidden Forest is probably Mr. Weasley’s car, because JKR said it would.

Laura: Well, she didn’t say it would help.

Ben: Speaking of which…

Laura: She said it would make an appearance.

Eric: And if it’s not to help, then it’s certainly not to break down in front of their eyes. [laughs]

Laura: Well, that doesn’t mean that it couldn’t be comic relief or something.

Andrew: Yeah, it probably will end up being something like that. “Harry was
walking along the Hogwarts grounds…”

Jamie: “And the Ford Anglia waved, ‘Hello,’ and then went back into the
Forest.”

Andrew: Yeah, it beeped, “Hello!”

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: “It disappeared and…” [laughs]

Andrew: And said, “Go buy the movie Cars out now on DVD.”

Jamie: Yeah. [laughs]

Eric: Oh, god. [laughs]


Will the Centaurs Help?


Laura: Well, I think with any other group of creatures or people,
you’re going to have the few that want to help, and the few that don’t. And that’s what I think it is.

Andrew: Well, what can they really provide?

Laura: Well, if they can see into the future…

Eric: Well, they can’t, though.

Ben: They don’t want to tell anybody, though.

Laura: Firenze is the only one that we’ve seen.

Ben: And look what happened to him.

Eric: Even then Firenze admits defeat. He says centaurs have read the
stars wrong before.

Laura: Well, yeah, but it doesn’t mean that they couldn’t at least be
somewhat beneficial.

Eric: That’s true.

Andrew: Maybe help a little bit. Wasn’t it them that predicted that the second war was going to begin?

Laura: It was them that predicted that Harry was supposed to die in the
Forest. [laughs]

Ben: That “Mars is bright tonight.”

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: Yeah, Harry was supposed to die that night in the Forest, and they were all like, “Hello, Harry Potter.” [laughs] “That way to Voldemort.” [laughs] “Just keep going.”


Why is the Forest Forbidden?


Andrew: Yeah. Yeah. Why do you think – now, this might just be a stupid question, but why do you think the Forest became forbidden in the first place? Do you think it was because of Aragog that it became forbidden?

Laura: No.

Eric: No, not just because – I’m sure it’s no one reason. It’s a forest and there’s all sorts of creatures. Well, most of all, I think the most reason is that kids would be unsupervised. It’s so close to the school grounds and there’s nobody really to keep watch over them there. They can’t even get a Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Well, I’m not saying it’s that difficult to people to watch kids, but it’s a long, dark forest, there’s animals that clearly do not want human beings, not only in their homes, but even to exist or to interfere with things. Kids are ignorant. They’d be stomping around, shooting spells.

Laura: Why do you think they built the school so close to the forest?

Jamie: But do you think it pre-dated Hogwarts?

Laura: Oh yeah. I think the forest…

Jamie: Perhaps it didn’t pre-date it.

Laura: I think the forest must have. I mean…

Jamie: It’s a nice forest though.

Laura: …it’s a forest. I mean, it’s old.

Jamie: But, but perhaps it was a really…

Ben: No, they planted the forest.

Jamie: Yeah. Every single tree. It took them a 1,000 years.

Eric: Johnny Appleseed was a Ravenclaw with a very bright idea.

Jamie: But perhaps this is a case of…

[Ben laughs]

Eric: Or Hufflepuff.

Jamie: Do you think it’s a case of, sort of keeping your friends close, but your enemies closer whereas, you know, they have the spiders there. It can’t only be Hagrid who knows that the spiders are in there, you know? They need him.

Laura: Well, the spiders are only there because of Hagrid, though. Aren’t they?

Eric: Yeah. That’s true.

Jamie: Oh, I know, but there’s other – there are werewolves in there obviously, you know?

Laura: Mhm.

Eric: Apparently.

Jamie: No, there are. Well, yeah. I mean according to Hagrid, there are. And there are unicorns and everything, thestrals as well. Hagrid also needs a place to keep all his Care of Magical Creatures Creatures.

Andrew: But Eric, do you think that this forest, there was any one point where maybe the forest was safe and then maybe Aragog started living in there and then…?

Eric: No.

Andrew: And then other creatures…

Eric: No, I think…

Andrew: …began living in there because it was forbidden. So, it was sort of like a…

Laura: Because Aragog invited them?

Andrew: No, because it was just abandoned…

Ben: Yeah. [Ben laughs]

Eric: Dangerous creatures lend me your, whatever you have.

Laura: No. I think it was always dangerous. I mean…

Eric: It’s always dangerous. Its just a – I don’t want to say occupational hazard – but if you’re a student going to Hogwarts and there’s a giant forest, there’s a risk of danger. I think it was, eventually, probably enough students died in there or enough students got injured or were coming back, you know, with scary stories that the Headmaster at that time of Hogwarts said…

Ben: With no legs.

Eric: Yeah, exactly. [laughs] You know? And eventually, at one point, the Headmaster would have to say, “Okay, we’re going to forbid this.” I hope it wasn’t Dumbledore. I hope it was Headmasters eons before Dumbledore, because Dumbledore can’t be the only one with sense.

Laura: Do you think there was any specific reason they built the school so close to a forest that’s obviously dangerous? Or…?

Ben: I don’t think it was… I don’t know. I mean maybe the forest holds some educational value for the students.

Eric: I think so.

Jamie: Oh, yeah.

Eric: Ben, that was very clever.

Andrew: It sort of does, but they don’t really take much advantage of it if there is educational value.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: Well, you don’t know that. Just because JK Rowling doesn’t include it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t happen.

Jamie: It’s pretty important.

Eric: That’s true.

Andrew: [laughs] Well.

Eric: I mean, things with Care of Magical Creatures wouldn’t really be possible if you just ship all of your creatures, you know, however far a distance just to study them. I mean, that’s one thing that it does benefit, and I guess plant life would definitely be the other one if you were to ask if Snape or if Sprout were to go into the forest to get things. It definitely does add a lot of the other things that you would need to teach a school, just not the direct things not like students going in there. That’s like saying, why is there a giant squid in the lake? You know? Why would you put it on a lake next to a giant squid?

[Andrew, Eric, and Laura laugh]

Eric: It’s there for educational value and that squid, I guess, is friendly. So…


Hagrid’s Hiding Place


Andrew: Well, yeah. We do know that. So, Hagrid has ended up hiding a lot of things in there: Aragog, Grawp, the thestrals. Well, did Hagrid hide those things?

Laura: No, the thestrals weren’t hidden.

Eric: Yeah. I think it’s because…

Jamie: They’re a natural…

Eric: Not the thestrals.

Jamie: I was going to say natural plantation.

Andrew: Okay, right.

Eric: It’s their natural habitat.

Jamie: Yes, it’s natural, it’s natural.

Eric: Hogwarts just borrows a few to pull the carriages.

Andrew: Do you think Hagrid could use the forest for anything else, like the motorcycle?

Eric: I don’t think Hagrid didn’t – Hagrid doesn’t have Sirius’ motorcycle. Sirius has Sirius’ motorcycle.

Laura: How do we know?

Eric: Because he went to return it to Sirius Black.

Ben: What did he do, did he drop it through the Veil to him?

[Andrew, Ben, and Eric laugh]

Eric: He drove through the Veil and jumped off just before going through it.

Jamie: Yeah, Evil Knievel.

[Eric laughs]

Eric: Exactly my thoughts, Jamie. Exactly my thoughts.

Laura: I don’t really think we’d have more than one motorized vehicle in the forest.

Jamie: Why, is there a rule against that?

[Eric and Laura laugh]

Ben: So, why would the motorcycle be out there? That’s what I want to know.

Laura: Well, it just… I don’t know, just because.

Jamie: But Laura, the Ford Anglia must get lonely so it needs a, sort of, motorized companion.

Andrew: …it needs a Love Bug.

Jamie: Exactly.

[Laura laughs]


Aragog’s Kids


Andrew: To wrap things up, Aragog’s kids. What do you think they’re doing these days? I mean, I guess it really doesn’t matter. They probably are just making a mess of the forest.

Jamie: Yeah, they are.

Andrew: They have no guidance, no nothing unless they’ve died.

Laura: I don’t think so.

Eric: Hagrid had to…

Ben: He had a lot of kids.

Eric: Hagrid had to put… I suppose they’re eating each other, aren’t they? Because he had to pull Aragog out so that they wouldn’t eat him.

Laura: Oh, yeah, that’s right.

Jamie: Oh, yeah.

Andrew: Why don’t they just rebel, go up to the school and cause trouble?

Ben: Knock on the doors.

Eric: [laughs] They could probably take it by storm.

Andrew: Knock on the doors, drink some soup. And…

Eric: Up until now, Dumbledore probably would’ve kept them out.

Jamie: If spiders ate soup, what soup would they eat?

Andrew: Oh, I’d say chicken.

Jamie: No way! It would be like – it would be like…

Andrew: Yeah, way.

Jamie: …Scottish vegetable and leek or something like that. It would be…

Andrew: No, no. I completely disagree.

Laura: I was going to say alphabet soup.

Andrew: Alphabet soup…

Jamie: What about legs? [laughs]

Ben: Dude, I could so go for some Spaghettios and meatballs right now. [laughs]

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Spaghettio? Spaghettios?

If anyone out there has a disagreement about the discussion we just had on the Forbidden Forest, you can always e-mail mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com or use the handy feedback form to submit a listener rebuttal that will either be posted on the site, be read on the show, or we’ll just read it and…

Ben: Or delete it. [laughs]


Last Week’s Show


Andrew: …we’ll just read it. [laughs] Yeah. Speaking of rebuttals, we got one concerning last week’s episode. Oh! You know? [laughs] Okay, that’s why I wanted to bring up “allegedly.” Did you guys realize there was not one complaint about the show last week?

Ben: Because…

Jamie: Really?

Andrew: Usually we get complaints about the show, and I think it’s because…

Ben: …of “allegedly.”

Jamie: Wait, Andrew, you weren’t on it, were you?

Andrew: …you guys said “allegedly.” Yeah.

Jamie: Andrew, you weren’t on it, I don’t think.

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: Okay, well… [laughs]

Laura: Yeah, me and Andrew weren’t there. [laughs]

Eric: [laughs] A lot of the problem causers.

Jamie: Oh, yeah, we need to fix all of the problems in this, then.

Andrew: I think it might [laughs] have to do with the fact that you guys said “allegedly” so much. I don’t know.

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe the show was just perfect last week, actually.

Ben: Well, I say the host last week was pretty darn good.

Eric: Yeah, I…

Andrew: You know?

Eric: Sorry.

Andrew: I felt so important when I was – when I heard Micah read my statement that I asked him to read.

Jamie: [laughs] Really? Yeah.

Andrew: I felt really important.

Ben: Like you’re the president or something.

Andrew: Some of that… Yeah, I’m going to have him read more statements for me when I don’t want to comment on some controversial topic.

Jamie: [laughs] Yeah. Your spokesman. [laughs] Your spokesperson.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah, exactly.

Jamie: A spoke…

[Eric laughs]

Jamie: A spokesman for Andrew Sims refused to comment.


Listener Rebuttal – Luna


Andrew: Yeah. [laughs] We have a rebuttal now, concerning last week’s show, as I brought up already. This is from Britney. She writes:

“When you were talking about Luna dropping off the radar after Book Five, I immediately thought of the fact that Fleur had also dropped off the radar after Book Four, and then came back fairly strong in Book Six. I just highly doubt that JK would not tell the outcome of such a mysterious character.”

Laura: Yeah. I agree.

Eric: Well, yeah.

Ben: Well, I think -I don’t forcefully know the outcome, but I don’t know how much of a role she’ll actually play in the book. We may hear, “Luna died” or something like that, but I don’t think it will be like a… Well, I just don’t think she’ll play that much of a role. We’ll see, we’ll see.

Eric: Guys, do you remember what Viktor Krum is doing? Because I think they mention – didn’t they mention him, as well, in Book Six? Like, just Hermione said she’s…

Jamie: She’s writing him. Yeah.

Eric: …she’s writing to him or something? Yeah. So that – that’s cool. I was just wondering. But yeah, she didn’t even have to really bring Fleur back, but I guess it’s just a case of – she shelves some characters…

Ben: Offers some closure.

Eric: …and then pulls them – pulls them back out. So…

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: What do you think – what do you think is going to happen if some aspects of the book don’t get any closure? Like, a certain character. Is it just going to be fan fiction up the wazoo about…

Eric: Easy, we’ll…

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: But there will be fan fiction anyway.

Laura: And people are going to complain like they did after Book Six.

Jamie: But there will be fan fiction…

Ben: Martin Miggs the Mad Muggle. Ha ha ha.

Eric: [Fake-laughs] Yeah, what if he doesn’t get closure? How does that series end?

Andrew: Speaking of – speaking of news, Dan brought up a good point this week. Dan Radcliffe. He said that the only way Jo’s going to get people to stop bugging her to write an eighth book is that if she kills off Harry. [laughs] So…

Jamie: No, but…

Laura: Oh, people will be bugging her to write some sort of eighth book anyway.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: [laughs]Yeah, they’ll be writing her to write anything anyway.

Andrew: She’s not going to write it.

Laura: No, she’s not.

Ben: Like Jamie, people will stop bugging her to write an eighth book if she writes one.

Jamie: Yeah. [laughs] Exactly. That’ll solve it.

Eric: I think if she doesn’t, if she doesn’t specifically add closure to something, I think it’ll be a case where the whole world is over, [laughs] so she doesn’t need to or something like that. Like where the gist of most of what we’d be concerned about would be covered and – didn’t she say she might – she’s seriously considering just writing like appendices…

Jamie: She did.

Eric: …like extra, extra stuff.

Jamie: She did.

Eric: And I would be satisfied with that.

Jamie: But the thing is, there are different types of closure. There’s closure for each character or there’s “and they lived happily ever after,” which solves everyone’s fate, really, instead of…

Eric: That’s true, too. Well, they shouldn’t end happily ever after because Disney does not own the rights to it. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, that’s very true. [laughs] Yeah.


Dueling Club – Snape vs. Hermione


Andrew: We are going to bring back a segment that we have not done in a long while. A long while. [starts to sing] It’s been a long time coming.

Ben: Which I invented.

Andrew: You did invent this?

Ben: Mhm.

Andrew: The dueling club.

Eric: Oh, wow.

Andrew: Ben, then I think it’s only right that you…

Jamie: Read it out then, Ben. [laughs]

Andrew: Read it out.

Ben: I’ll read it. Let me hit an F10 here. Snape versus Hermione. Ryan, 20, from Pennsylvania writes:

“I don’t know if you guys are doing this anymore but I had an interesting one. It’s not much of a duel, technically, but here you go. Snape’s intelligence versus Hermione’s intelligence. A battle of the smarts.”

Jamie: See, I think Snape is a very, very, very, very clever guy. I know, he really is, though. His magical ability, first of all, but also, he knows… Being a potions master, I don’t think it’s easy to brew potions. And also, he knows Occlumency, Legilimency, he knows all these things. If you’re talking now, then easily, Snape would win. Easily. Well, in terms of if they actually dueled…

Andrew: Intelligence.

Laura: Yeah…

Jamie: No, if they actually dueled. Snape would…

Ben: Oh, I don’t know. I think it’d be a case where Hermione would be making fun of Snape. You got outsmarted by a little girl. That type of thing.

Jamie: Ben, do you honestly think that if they had a magical duel, Hermione would win? She wouldn’t have a chance against Snape.

Ben: No, we’re talking about intellectually.

Andrew: Maybe – we’re talking about, yeah.

Jamie: Have them play chess or something.

Eric: Yeah, right, exactly. We don’t know the way it’s applied.

Jamie: How are we suppose to compare them?

Andrew: Maybe it’s a….

Jamie: Have them both take an SAT?

Andrew: Battle of wits.

Eric: Jamie…

Ben: Who gets the higher SAT scores. [laughs]

Eric: No, if it’s wits, I still think Snape would win.

Laura: Yeah, I agree.

Eric: Jamie illustrates a brilliant point. Intelligence. Hermione’s intelligence goes a lot with book smarts, reciting something. If you would ask her what Chapter 17 or what a certain author’s opinion on something was, she would tell you. But, intelligence otherwise, as in cleverness, wit, mind-reading, Occlumency, all that other stuff that actually applies – even a game of chess – is not book smarts, and therefore I think Snape would have the upper hand.

Ben: It’s just because he’s older. He’s older. That’s the only reason.

Andrew: Well, yeah, true. In Half-Blood Prince, the book – the stuff in there. I mean…

Jamie: [laughs] Look at it like that.

Andrew: No, I mean his…

Jamie: The poem.

Andrew: His book in Half-Blood Prince.

Ben: Oh okay. The Potions Book.

Andrew: Yes, the Potions Book. That was – that shows how comfortable he is with potions.

Eric: Anybody know the exact title?

Ben: Advanced Potions Making.

Eric: Oh, very good.

Laura: Yeah, I agree. It really – it showed that Snape was a lot more innovative.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Because Hermione tended to follow directions and Snape would find his own
way.

Andrew: Right. Right. Did Hermione screw up a potion in Book Five?

Jamie: Yeah, yeah she did. No, she screwed it up…

Eric: I think everyone was screwing up potions except for Harry.

Ben: It was in Book Six.

Jamie: Yeah, it was in Book Six.

Andrew: Oh. Okay. Well, yeah. So, and in a duel too, you guys think … I guess he would.

Ben: I think just the age thing.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: By the time Hermione is at that age, like her 30s or however old Snape is…

Eric: Guys, do you have any idea how much Snape has survived? Snape has battled Voldemort. I mean, every single time he’s been in Voldemort’s presence, that’s kind of like battling Voldemort. So…

Jamie: Yeah. It’s like, I do not think…

Laura: It’s pretty easy. If you think about it, Jo said that Harry would defeat Hermione in a duel. So, I think if Harry could defeat Hermione, Snape certainly could. .

Eric: Well, duel or in Occlumency too.

Jamie: Harry could not beat Snape in a million years, as demonstrated in the end of Half-Blood Prince, when he was blocking his spells easily.

Eric: Oh, yeah. He couldn’t even say the spells. That was awesome, though. I really, really applaud that.

Jamie: That was an awesome scene. Awesome.

Eric: It showed how Harry was.

Jamie: “You’ll fail again and again until you learn to keep your mind shut and your mouth shut.” Or something like that.

Eric: Even then, he’s teaching him.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: Even then, he’s teaching him. God.

Ben: [Imitating Eric] Oh, god. Oh, god. Oh, god.

Andrew: Thank you for that Dueling Club.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: And if anyone else has any other Dueling Club match-ups that you would like to submit to us, just sent them to mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com. It can be creative ones like this one, Snape versus Hermione in a battle of wits, or it could just be a tradition.

Eric: It was good.

Andrew: Traditional duel. Yeah. Now, before I read this, I just want to make a quick disclaimer. My fellow co-hosts are going to complain to me that I included this rebuttal just because…

Jamie: Oh, yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: It involves me. I do want to say that I chose this rebuttal…

Jamie: They come from New Jersey as well.

Laura: Mhm.

Andrew: No, no, it didn’t.

Jamie: It so did.

Eric: You read them every time it includes you.


Listener Rebuttals – Elections


Andrew: I chose this rebuttal before I realized it included me. I’m sorry, okay? If it said Eric Scull, I would have included it too. Anyway. Stephanie, 19 of Washington writes:

“Hey MuggleCasters. I just voted yesterday in the midterm elections and found myself quite unsure of who to give my vote to in more than a few races. There were positions that I had absolutely no clue about. So, I did the logical thing. I filled in the ‘Write-In Candidate’ box with Harry Potter characters. Included among them were Harry, James and Lily Potter, Ron Weasley and Dumbledore. In the last box I had available a thought occurred to me: ‘Hey, Stephanie, how could you make this a situation through which your name might be read on MuggleCast?'”

[Andrew and Eric laugh]

Andrew: Well, she got that part right.

“That’s right: I voted for Andrew Sims for County Treasurer. I hope you win, buddy. Those other guys don’t stand a chance.”

Ben: Hold on a second, hold on a second. Why is this a listener rebuttal?

Andrew: It’s not.

Ben: It’s not, it’s just an excuse for you to read it.

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: No, it’s not a rebuttal, it’s a… Well, there weren’t many rebuttals this week. So… I just thought, there is the question, why don’t we campaign to get people to vote for…

Laura: Us?

Andrew: Us. Or Harry Potter characters.

Laura: I’d have to think about it.


Andrew’s Listener Challenge


Andrew: It would have been fun. As I promised in the beginning of the show, I have a listener challenge for everyone. I don’t know, maybe you guys have heard about this already, I don’t know if you’ve checked your calendars, or something like that. This month, November, is actually National MuggleCast at McDonald’s Month. Did you guys hear about this?

Jamie: What is it?

Laura: No.

Jamie: National…

Andrew: National MuggleCast at McDonald’s Month.

Jamie: I can’t say, I haven’t yet.

Andrew: You didn’t know? It’s been posted at McDonald’s across the world.

Laura: Okay, what happened to the fight against childhood obesity?

Andrew: Uh… I don’t know what you’re talking about.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: No, we do that too, Laura, because you listen to the show on your iPod when you’re going for a jog, so you’re getting exercise. There you go. So, you’re helping that cause too.

Laura: Yeah, now you can listen to it while you’re picking up your McDonald’s after your jog.

Jamie: What, you’re Big Mac? Yeah.

Ben: While you’re stuffing your face.

Jamie: Exactly.

Andrew: And in honor of National MuggleCast at McDonald’s Month, we have a little contest for everyone here. Don’t ask me what the prize is yet, maybe a gift certificate to McDonald’s or something.

Eric: Maybe a t-shirt.

Andrew: But, here’s what you do. There’s two ways to go about this. The first step, visit your local McDonald’s. Now, here’s where it gets tricky. You can either go in the store, and purchase a delicious McDonald’s meal, then after you purchase your meal [laughs] visit to the refreshments area and post a sign on the vending machine with a small promotional ad for MuggleCast. Take a picture of the sign on the soda fountain machine and enjoy your meal. Now for bonus points, have an McDonald’s employees standing next to the sign in the picture, and for extra bonus points – this is going to be tricky, I don’t think many people are going to be able to pull this off – have Ronald McDonald standing next to the picture – standing next to the sign.

Jamie: And for extra, extra bonus points…

[Eric laughs]

Jamie: …extra, extra bonus points, have Elvis standing next to you when you take the photo.

[Andrew and Eric laugh]

Andrew: And for extra, extra, extra bonus points, have Jamie standing in your picture.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: Yeah.

Jamie: But, I’m alive.

Eric: Or just put a MuggleCast – Elvis stand-up in front of it.

[Eric and Andrew laugh]

Andrew: Yeah, that’s true. There’s a second way you can go about doing this. You can go through the McDonald’s drive-thru and order a delicious McDonald’s meal, but post a sign on the ordering kiosk – the thing that you talk into that displays your order and stuff. Post a sign on that…

Eric: [laughs] “Can I get a MuggleCast?”

Andrew: …with a small promotional ad for MuggleCast. Take a picture, and pull up to the first window to pick up your meal. Now for bonus points, you can do this one…

Eric: With Elvis.

Andrew: …but make the ad look like it’s a meal order. So for example maybe you could do, maybe, a number nine MuggleCast with extra funny, and hold the boring. Price: Free.

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: Something like that. Ummm, so [Laughs] we’re looking forward to seeing what you guys can do.

Jamie: Andrew, I’m getting kind of worried about your listener challenges. They’re getting more and more sort of scandalous. It’s going to be like Fight Club.

Ben: Daring.

Jamie: It’s going to be, “Right, my challenge this month is to rob a coffee shop and destroy an ornamental fountain, and rob a bank, and bring me the posters…”

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: Actually, that’s March’s challenge.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: March’s challenge.

Eric: I don’t know. I think the hardest part of that entire task is going to be acquiring a “delicious” McDonald’s meal.

Jamie: Yeah. [Laughs]

Andrew: I beg to differ. I think they are delicious.

Eric: Eh, Burger King rules.

Andrew: Yeah, you’re right, Burger King is better. So, we’re going to set a deadline on this. We’re going to make it November 30th. So, you have through the end of November to take the National MuggleCast McDonald’s Month Listener Challenge.

Ben: You get extra points if you’re wearing your MuggleCast t-shirt in the picture.

Andrew: Yes. In the picture.

Eric: Or if you put it on Ronald McDonald.

Jamie: Or Elvis.

Andrew: Don’t ask us how you’re playing for points. Or…

Eric: Or the Burger Goblin where he says, “You must be this tall to go on rides.” [laughs[Just put an extra large t-shirt on him.


British Joke of the Day


Andrew: Yeah. Jamie, can you please enlighten us with a British joke today? I like it when you come up – I like when you come up with original jokes, like the kettle one.

Jamie: I did actually come up with one, Andrew, while we were recording today, okay?

Andrew: Ohhh.

Jamie: Okay, okay, so these people, okay, are on this ship, okay? And they’re all inside the sort of main controlling bin where all the controls are, and there’s one cat sitting on the instrumentation panel, okay? Yeah?

Andrew: Mhm. Yeah.

Jamie: And he’s sitting there. He’s always sitting there. You know? Whenever they walk in, he’s always there. One day they walk in to find he isn’t sitting on the instrumentation panel, so the captain turns to the first mate and says, “Hey have you seen the cat?” and he says, “No, I haven’t. He must have fell off the radar.”

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Andrew: Oh, gee. That was pun-believable.

Jamie: Pun-believable? Good.


Anniversaries


Eric: I have an announcement.

Andrew: You do? What, Eric, what is your announcement?

Eric: Well. This is what? Today is the twelfth of November? Okay, this [deep, dramatic sigh] day, four years ago…

Andrew: Oh, gee.

Eric: Four years ago. Oh, gee.

Andrew: I’m going to start crying!

Eric: Oh, gee. Here it is! Here it is! Here it is!

Andrew: I’m going to cry!

Eric: I have been at MuggleNet four years today.

Laura: Awww.

Jamie: That’s very, very, very nice.

Andrew: Round of applause for Mr. Eric Scull, ladies and gentlemen.

Eric: And… And, four years ago today I took up the Caption Contest. On this four year anniversary of the Caption Contest being taken over by me, I’ve started it up again, so that’s it. Just go to mugglenet dot com slash cc, or you can look in the left margin panel under “Fun,” because it is fun, and Caption Contest. So, there you go.

Andrew: Well, cool.

Ben: Well, also, I have an announcement.

Andrew: I’m not even done yet. What?

Ben: Sometime during November, I don’t remember the exact date, is when I joined MuggleNet. So, it’s been three years for me.

Eric: I can’t believe it.

Andrew: Awww.

Laura: Awww.

Ben: I know, I can hardly believe it.

Andrew: And, like that isn’t enough, today is the three… [laughs] three-year. Today
is the one year anniversary of when we did our first live podcast in New York City for the Goblet of Fire premiere.

Laura: Oh!

Eric: That’s right! And I got Emerson to buy me a hat last year. [laughs]

Andrew: I know, because you were like…

Ben: Three-year…

Andrew: …”It’s my three-year anniversary! Buy me a hat!” [laughs]


Chicken Soup For The MuggleCast Soul


Andrew: We’re going to wrap things up this week with a Chicken Soup, the segment everyone loves to hate.

[Ben and Laura laugh]

Andrew: From Pike, twenty eight of Denver, Colorado. This is another election-themed Chicken Soup:

Yesterday I had the joy of waiting in line for three hours to cast a vote in the Colorado election. Luckily, I knew what was ahead of me and I ran home to pick up my iPod and Book Five to pass the time. Listening to old MuggleCast episodes kept me sane standing in line and kept my mind off my stomach growling for three hours. Plus, I was able to avoid talking…

Ben: Why didn’t they run home and get food?

Andrew: …to the disgruntled man in front of me the whole time.

Good point, Ben! Good point. I don’t know.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: But thanks, Pike. We’re glad MuggleCast can help you relieve those election lines.


Listener Rebuttal – Jamie’s Too American


Andrew: Jamie, before we wrap up the show. We got this e-mail this week, and I thought you might want to address it.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Because, I don’t know. Maybe she’s right. Maybe she’s right.

Jamie: …I thought.

Andrew: Katie of Glasgow, Scotland. She writes:

I’ve tried in vain to ignore this issue, but I’m afraid that it just exasperates me so much that it has forced me into sending an irate e-mail. I’m concerned…

No…

I’m writing concerning Jamie’s frequent use of words such as “trash can,” “kindergarten,” and, most annoyingly, “candy.” Frankly, I’m surprised he has not yet developed an American twang to his accent and does not add “like” into every available pause in his speech (sorry for the stereotype).

Girl, like, you’re so up on that.

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: Not only is this a betrayal of his own culture, he is insulting the intelligence of the American public by suggesting that they will not be able to understand phrases such as “bin” and “sweets.” Singing “Proud To Be An American” is one thing, but adopting another country’s idiom is another matter altogether.

Whoa snap, Jamie!

Jamie: Katie, I was wondering if you could act like the sky at about 6AM and lighten up, please.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Allegedly!

Jamie: I’m sorry, allegedly. I’m sorry, that was a bit mean. But no, in fact I have met – it isn’t insulting intelligence at all, but I have met some Americans who don’t know what “bin” is. It’s not because they’re stupid, it’s because they’re don’t hear that word. I didn’t know what, you know?

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: I – the only reason I knew what a “trash can” was, was because it sounds like what it is. I didn’t know what “kindergarten” was the first time I heard it. When I was in America and Micah talked about how many blocks something was away, I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about because I hadn’t heard it before. It’s just – we’re catering for a mostly American…

Ben: What do you guys say instead of blocks?

Jamie: It’s “streets.” It’s a street. You know? We’re catering for a mostly American audience. I try to Americanize it so, you know, because that’s the majority of the audience.

Eric: That makes sense.

Jamie: I’m sure. And, you know, it takes thinking about it. It’s quite hard to remember to say “kindergarten” and “candy” and stuff like that. But, it certainly isn’t insulting intelligence I just do it because, you know? I mean, we try to do it on the site as well so I thought we should bring it over to this. And I’m not – I’m not betraying my own culture.

Andrew: Traitor. [laughs]

[Laura laughs]

Eric: So, yeah.

Jamie: No. Katie, I wasn’t trying to be mean at all. I was just saying that it really isn’t the case at all. I’m just trying to cater to the biggest audience around. So, yeah. Thank you for writing.


Show Close


Andrew: On that happy, British note, I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: No, you’re not. [music begins in background] Contact us, email us, at…

Andrew: Oh, yeah.

[Andrew and Eric laugh]

Andrew: [after brief pause] No?

Ben: Email mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com. Or go to MuggleCast.com where you can see our contact information, etcetera, etcetera. There’s a feedback form. Click the link that says “Contact”. If you want to send something via mail, send it to PO Box 223 Moundridge, Kansas 67107. Maybe, I think maybe next week we’ll do a PO Box update because we haven’t for a while. Andrew, what are the phone numbers?

Andrew: The numbers; if you’re in the United States, you can dial 1-218-20-MAGIC. If you’re in the United Kingdom, you can dial 020-8144-0677. If you’re in Australia, you can dial 02-8003-5668. We will get back to voicemails next week. When you’re submitting voicemail questions, keep them general questions about the Harry Potter series. Or you know, or they can be some off-beat questions. Also, we want to encourage everyone to get involved in the MuggleCast community such as the MySpace that we have at MySpace.com/MuggleCastFans. Become our friend because we are almost at three thousand friends. Probably by later tonight we’ll be at three thousand friends. That’s a lot of people. You can also join theFacebookgroup, MuggleCast. And also be sure to vote for us at Podcast Alley. Join the YouTube group for MuggleCast, join the MuggleCast Frappr, rate and review us on Yahoo! Podcasts, it’s all there. You can also go to MuggleCast.com for all the community links. But, most importantly, become our MySpace friends.

Ben: Most importantly.

Andrew: We like MySpace friends. So, on that note, I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Eric: And I’m Eric Scull.

Andrew: Thank you, everyone, for listening, and we’ll see you next week for Episode 63.

Ben: No, 64. Sixty-four, right?

Andrew: Oh, and as a final note – 64, 64. Yeah, 64. And just a final note, [laughs]before I forget. The interview with the creators of the Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix video game will be on our show the week of the 26th, which should be Episode 65.

Ben:: Turkey. Turkey Day.

Andrew: Yeah. The Thanksgiving show.

Eric: Turkey, turkey, turkey, turkey.

Andrew: See everyone then. Or actually, next week. Buh-bye.

Eric: Buh-bye.

Ben: Bye.


Bloopers


Jamie: Oh, meatballs are so nice. Ben, Ben.

Ben: Yeah?

Jamie: The other night I cooked a sort of like, meatballs – beef meatballs in, sort of, curry powder and some garlic and lemon juice and it was so good. And then I made a stir-fry out of it. Oh my God, it was good. It was so good.

Eric: You’re a cook, Jamie.

Andrew: The recipe will be available at MuggleCast.com.

Jamie: Well, yeah. [laughs] Yeah.

Eric: And the Show Notes. [laughs]

Jamie: Do you know what gets me on these cooking programs? It’s so annoying; when instead of saying “pour it in,” they sort of “drizzle it in.” Or instead of, instead of, you know, “sprinkle it in,” it’s “take a pinch and slap it in.” They use…

Ben: Bam.

Eric: Bam.

Jamie: They just use stupid words.

Ben: Bam.

Jamie: It’s so annoying.

Eric: Dash. Just a dash. Just…

Jamie: Yeah. A dash.

Eric: Well, no, it’s just to make it seem so much more exciting and elegant that it actually…

Jamie: Yeah, it would be pretty boring if they put “put it in the bowl and put in it the oven.”

Eric: Not that it is, but if they said, “Okay, put it in the bowl, put it in the oven.”

Jamie: Actually.

Ben: Slam it in the oven.

Eric: You know, it’s just – it’s theatrics.

Laura: That’s nice.

[Andrew, Ben, and Eric laugh]

Laura: But anyway…

Jamie: Do it at 360 degrees and slam it in the oven.

Eric: Jamie, have you finished – have you finished. your Lucky Charms yet?

Jamie: No, I haven’t. I’ve still got like, a box left or something. I have been eating them for breakfast, though.

———————–

Written by: Micah, Adrienne, Allison, Amanda, Briana, Jessica, Judy, Mandie, Margaret, Martina, Matt, Megan, Roni, Samantha, Sarah, Shannon and Shelly

Transcript #62

MuggleCast 62 Transcript


Show Intro


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[Show intro music]

Because life takes MuggleCast, this is MuggleCast Episode 62 for November 5th, 2006…allegedly.

Eric: Remember, remember, the fifth of November. The Gunpowder Treason and plot. I know of no reason why the Gunpowder Treason should ever be forgot.

Ben: What is that – what is that from?

Eric and Jamie: V for Vendetta.

[Jamie laughs]

Eric: The quote is V, with the Guy Fawkes mask on, because, Jamie?

Jamie: Well, because a few years ago – quite a few now – Guy Fawkes tried to blow up the Houses of Parliament just like V did in the film, and he didn’t succeed, unlike V in the film, and he got caught, tortured, sentenced to death along with his fellow conspirators. And so we celebrate – I don’t know why we [laughs] celebrate it, actually.

[Eric laughs]

Jamie: But yeah, we do, every single November 5th, by setting off loads and loads of fireworks, basically. That’s it in a nutshell.

Ben: Because he tried to blow a building up?

Jamie: Yeah, I know.

[Ben laughs]

Eric: Well, he’s not…

Jamie: It isn’t just a building, to be fair. That’s like, you know, it’s quite an important building. But, yeah, basically, because he did that.

Eric: It was like – they were against the Catholics, were they? The – there was like oppression.

Jamie: Yeah, I can’t remember the King’s name. I can’t believe, this is so bad, I don’t know this.

Ben: Was that – was that the start of the show, or what?

Jamie: Yes.

Eric: That’s why it’s MuggleCast now. So, it’s 62.

Ben: Oh, so it’s MuggleCast now..

Eric: For November 5th, 2006.

Ben: [laughs] Oh, well, welcome back, everybody. I’m Ben Schoen.

Kevin: I’m Kevin Steck.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Eric: I’m Eric Scull.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

[Intro music continues to play]


Halloween Recap


Ben: This is the show where we bring you Harry Potter news, theories, discussion, you know, all that good stuff. This is the first episode after Halloween.

Jamie: Actually…

Ben: How is everybody? What did you end up doing, Jamie?

Jamie: What did I end up doing? I stayed at home, waiting by the door, with my steel-toed shoes on so I could dropkick pumpkins…

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: …and not break my toes, but it turns out that no one…

Ben: And kick little kids in the side of the head, right?

Jamie: Exactly. Specifically that.

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: But no one turned up, no one knocked, so I think they must have heard the show and got worried and not turned up. So, yeah, I had a boring evening in.

Ben: Aw, that’s too bad. What about – what about you, Micah?

Micah: Actually, very similar. Nobody came to my door at all for trick-or-treating. I was kind of disappointed.

Ben: [laughs] We hope that everyone else had a good holiday, too. Without further ado, let’s go to Micah Tannenbaum for a look at this past week’s Harry Potter news stories.


News


Micah: [in chipmunk voice] At 5:30 PM on November 16th, Bonnie Wright will switch on London’s Marylebone High Street Christmas lights as part of the seasonal festivities. The event will include various live music acts, food and drink, shopping stalls, an appearance by Santa, and a fireworks display.

The team at MuggleNet Fan Fiction has posted the winners of their first annual Quill Awards, which recognizes excellence in fan fiction writing. Congrats to all the winners, and we hope everyone enjoys the stories!

Access Hollywood via Dark Horizons is reporting that Michael Hoffman is in talks with Warner Brothers to direct Half-Blood Prince, which is due for release in November 2008.

An official announcement is expected by the end of the year, and we’ll let you know of updates as we hear them!

HBO on Demand will start airing “a sneak preview” of Order of the Phoenix on November 20th. Right now there are no other details concerning what will be included in HBO’s preview, but our guess is that it might include clips from the trailer, which will be released on November 17th before Happy Feet.

As we reported in October, Goblet of Fire will make its television premiere on November 19th. In association with the movie, HBO is holding a contest to win tickets to the Order of the Phoenix premiere.

Finally, be sure to check out a brand-new interview with David Thewlis (who plays Professor Lupin) where he discusses the fifth Harry Potter film.

[changes to normal voice] And just so you know that that was legit, that’s all the news [changes to chipmunk voice] for this November 5th, [changes to normal voice] 2006 edition of MuggleCast. [changes to chipmunk voice] Back to the show.

Ben: [laughs] Thanks for that, Micah. See…

Eric: [laughs] Micah Tannenbaum!

Ben: See, for those of you who don’t remember, Micah made a bet that if she did not release the title on Halloween, that he would have to say the news in a chipmunk voice and so [laughs] there you have it.

Eric: What?

Jamie: Nice one.

Micah: I kept up my end of the deal, though. So…


Title of Book Seven


Ben: So, Micah, why didn’t she release the title? Do you think she’s not ready? I mean, she did talk about the title, right?

Micah: She did talk about the title.

Kevin: I think she did that just to taunt you.

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah. I agree.

Ben: [laughs] Just to taunt Micah.

Micah: I didn’t pay her enough, actually.

[Kevin laughs]

Ben: Well, speaking of which, that’s something we want to discuss, is she said she has a third title for Book Seven. We were all there at Radio City Music Hall the second night – well, some of us were. And she said how that morning, or that day during the – while she was in the shower, she thought of a second title for Book Seven, and now she has a third one and she said that it is ahead by a short nose, or “perhaps that should be a vowel and two consonants.” So, what do you guys think about the whole title stuff?

Eric: I think she added three letters.

Kevin: I think she’s teasing us.

Micah: Yeah, I mean, now there’s not just two, now there’s three. She just
likes messing around with us.

Jamie: Oh, I feel…

Ben: I know. Hopefully, hopefully we’ll get to know what the other two
titles are.

Jamie: I know what it is. It’s…

Ben: What?

Jamie: She’s just added the word “the” to it. That’s two consonants and a
vowel.

[Eric and Kevin laugh]

Jamie: I bet it’s something, something, and something, and then… Oh, sorry, Harry Potter and something, and then she’s added “the” into it. I bet that’s it. In fact, I will eat…

Eric: You know what that…

Jamie: Actually, no I won’t.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: You stop right there.

Ben: [laughs] “I will eat.” I love those bets.

Eric: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah. Although, I just think it means that she favors this title above the other two and that it’s just got a few more letters than the other two, as well.


Time on Book Seven Title


Ben: Right, but if she didn’t release the title this – on Halloween,
when do you think we can see it? I mean, when do you think we will see it?

Jamie: Christmas, maybe?

Eric: I don’t want to wait that long.

Ben: I don’t know.

Jamie: It’s like a month.

Eric: I think maybe something like this. Guy Fawkes Day.

Jamie: Huh?

Ben: Yeah, but what about…

Eric: It’s Guy Fawkes Day today.

Ben: Today?

Eric: Maybe by the end of the night she’ll release the title.

Ben: I doubt it.

Kevin: Maybe Christmas?

Ben: So, what do you think this means for the timing of Book Seven? I still
think it’s going to be 2008.

Jamie: Yeah, I agree.

Kevin: Yeah, I do, too.

Jamie: Of course, all the way, 2008.

Ben: But don’t you agree that’s kind of cool because we get to do this for a whole other year?
Isn’t that awesome?

Eric: I don’t know, why don’t we ask the audience? Do you guys want to sit
through this for another year?

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: I can’t hear them right now, I must admit.

Ben: More cities. More cities, more…

Jamie: More continents.

Ben: Yeah, more continents, more…

Jamie: More planets.

Ben: Yeah, for you it’s continents, yeah.

Jamie: More planets. We’ll go to Mars next, Ben.

Ben: Yeah, we’re going to podcast – we’re going to podcast…

Kevin: More planets.

Ben: We’re going to podcast from the moon.

Jamie: Yeah.

[Jamie and Kevin laugh]

Ben: Certainly, I don’t think, the fact that she didn’t release it probably means that she’s still working on it and probably has quite a bit left to go. So…

Jamie: Oh, yeah.

Ben: Sorry for those of you who were counting on 2007. I don’t think it’s
going to happen.

Eric: But something that Ben said about us knowing the other two potential
titles, too. I don’t know if we will or not, because there’s definitely
people who are like, “Oh, I prefer that title better.” You know? And I…

Ben: Well, maybe, maybe they give away too much, like…

Jamie: Yeah, they probably do.

Ben: Besides the title, maybe the other two would add – give us more information.

Jamie: Harry Potter and the Death of Harry Potter.

Ben: She definitely wouldn’t release… Yeah, The Death of Harry Potter. [laughs]

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: She definitely wouldn’t release the other two until after Book Seven is already done.

Eric: Yeah, I would think so.

Jamie: Yeah. And people have read it.

Eric: And after everybody is used to it.

Ben: I just don’t think it’s possible.

Eric: And it could be like an alternate title. Like, did you guys know – no, I’m not going to make the comparison, well, I guess I am. Star Wars: Episode VI was actually, preliminarily, Revenge of the Jedi. And there were actually posters you can get on EBay, Revenge of the Jedi, Episode VI: Revenge of the Jedi, and George Lucas, then halfway through the ad campaign, decided that Jedi weren’t vengeful necessarily in their character, so he turned it to Return of the Jedi.

Ben: Oh.

Eric: And then of course Episode III became Revenge of the Sith.

Jamie: Return of the Sith.

Eric: [laughs] Return of the Sith. Well, they were there.

Kevin: Return of the Sith. [laughs]

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Eric: But, yeah. So, that was interesting.


Announcements


Ben: But anyways, one way you can – one way you can demonstrate your support for our show, if you want us to keep doing this for years, is by voting for us on Podcast Alley. com. I have no idea, no idea where we are right now on [laughs] on Podcast Alley. Sorry, I just looked at the picture there, again.

Eric: Because truth be told we don’t even check it. We just, you know, vote for us.

Ben: Yeah, well see, it’s actually not loading right now. Oh, here we go. Oh, geez, we are number four and we are getting – we’re not even the number one Harry Potter podcast on Podcast Alley.

Eric: Great. Gee, which one?

Ben: So, go out show your support for us, vote for MuggleCast.

Jamie: Please, please.


MuggleNet Book Update


Ben: A little update on the book. We have received quite a few pre-orders
and we’re very pleased with the amount of people, the feedback on it, the
amount of people who are purchasing it, and once again, MuggleNet.com’s, What Will Happen in Harry Potter 7: Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Falls in Love, And How Will The Adventure Finally End? You can purchase it – pre-order it through Amazon. I think the book’s actually going to be at retailers by the end of this month. So, you can go pick it up at your Barnes and Noble if you don’t want to pre-order it. Yeah, but if you do pre-order, it helps support the show, the site, everything, so go ahead and do that.

Eric: Ben, do you think we might be able to grace ourselves with an
interview with the authors of that novel?

Jamie: No, no, they’re untouchable, Ben, I hear.

Ben: I don’t know, they’re pretty busy.

Jamie: They are very busy.

Kevin: Yeah.

[Ben laughs]

Kevin: Very arrogant.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Well, I figure they had a show…

Jamie: And rather good-looking I hear, as well, from an unknown source.

Ben: Yeah, especially the one…

Eric: We may need to offer them a great portion of our money. You know, we
could broadcast from zero gravity if we pulled the funds enough, because
they are selling zero gravity trips now for what, $3,000?

Kevin: Where did his come from?

Eric: Because…

Jamie: Where did this come from?

Kevin: Yeah, but I think it’s coming from the topic about broadcasting from
space.

Eric: Because we could podcast from the moon.

Kevin: Yeah.

Eric: Yeah.

Kevin: But the thing is, we said that like ten minutes ago. [laughs]

Jamie: Ten light years ago.


MuggleCast T-Shirts


Ben: Another reminder: MuggleCast t-shirts. We will end sale on them on
January 1st. So, this is pretty much your last chance to buy them, as sort
of like the big going out of business sale, but, however, you must remember
this is not like those bands that do this for sympathy.

[Eric laughs]

Ben: And then three months later they come back, you know? [laughs] We all heard of, like, I think KISS – they’re the band during the ’70s, ’80s, ands the ’90s even. They had
three different farewell tours, where they would disappear and then they
would, all of a sudden, they would come back.

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: They wouldn’t have their makeup on or they would have their makeup on, but we’re not doing that. This is seriously it. We are no longer allowed to sell them after January 1st.

Jamie: Yeah. We always record with out makeup on, don’t we, Ben?

[Micah laughs]

Ben: [laughs] Yeah, yes. But, yes, after January 1st we will no longer be allowed to sell the t-shirts, so go out and pick yours up.


Gilmore Girls


And one final thing we need to mention in the announcements this week is, last week Andrew, who is unfortunately not here to defend himself – he bashed the Gilmore Girls, the show that’s on the WB or…

Eric: He didn’t! He didn’t!

Ben: Well, he said what his opinion was.

Eric: [sarcastically] Oh my god!

Ben: And it was not very kind.

Jamie: And he didn’t prefix it with the word, “allegedly,” or, “my opinion is,” or…

Ben: Yeah. Didn’t he say that he thought it was the stupidest show he’s ever seen? [laughs]

Jamie: Apparently. [laughs]

Ben: Apparently.

Eric: Allegedly, “this is the stupidest show ever.” No. I have no problem, I’ve seen a few episodes. I have no problem.

Micah: Well, actually…

Ben: Micah, didn’t Andrew want you to say something about that?

Micah: He did. He actually sent me an official statement by him.

Jamie: From the heart, Micah, from the heart. From the heart.

Micah: [laughs] It is definitely from the heart! He wanted to communicate to the fans that he was just joking and he didn’t want to upset anybody, because we did get a bunch of e-mails from fans. Some of them were a little bit more passionate than others, I guess this is the right way to put it.

[Eric laughs]

Micah: And he also wanted to say that he’s watched a grand total of two minutes of The Gilmore Girls

[Ben and Jamie laugh]

Micah: …so his opinion obviously was not that well-thought out. So, he does apologize to all the fans who like Gilmore Girls and…

Ben: Speaking of Andrew…

Eric: He’s hospitalized right now from passionate…

Ben: Yeah, because The Gilmore Girls fan girls came and abducted him. [laughs] No, he’s – yeah, he’s not here this week. He’s off doing a college visit. You know, he’s preparing for the next level. I don’t know. [laughs]

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: Yup. So, sorry about that.

Eric: What college?

Ben: We’ll make sure that – just realize that it’s our personal opinions.

Kevin: We’ll have to keep him in line.

Ben: We’re sorry that we offended anybody about The Gilmore Girls. We got an email from someone saying that they were deeply offended that we talked smack on The Gilmore Girls.

Eric: This is, after all, a Harry Potter podcast.

Ben: [laughs] Yeah, this is a Harry Potter podcast, not a Gilmore Girls podcast.

Micah: But we were joking, I think, and it was just taken a little bit out of context.

Jamie: Hey, I’m really, really glad it’s not a Gilmore Girls [laughs] podcast, because that show sucks!

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Allegedly! Allegedly!

Jamie: Oh, yeah, sorry. I forgot to mention it.

Eric: So, allegedly you’re really glad.

Jamie: Allegedly glad.

Eric: We’re following in the same pattern here.

Ben: See, we always make these mistakes.


Listener Rebuttal – Peeves


Ben: According to – who sent this rebuttal in? No name. They said:

“Hey, MuggleCasters! I have a comment about your discussion on the ghosts that live in Hogwarts. Laura is right. You can’t get them out of the school, at least in the case of Peeves. Here’s what I hope counts as proof. It’s from the interview between Emerson, Melissa, and Jo. Emerson says, ‘Why does Dumbledore allow Peeves to stay in the castle?’ Jo says, ‘You can’t get him out.’ Emerson says, (and this is the opinion that Jamie and I had), ‘He’s Dumbledore, he can do anything!'”

Jamie: Yeah!

Ben: “JKR says, ‘No, no, no, no, no. Peeves is like dry rot. You can try and eradicate it. It comes with the building. If you’ve got Peeves, you’re stuck.’ And then Emerson replied, ‘But Peeves answers to Dumbledore.'”

[Eric laughs]

Ben: “JKR said, ‘Allegedly.’ Melissa said, ‘Allegedly?’ JKR said, ‘Yeah. I see Peeves as like a severe plumbing problem in an old building, and Dumbledore is slightly better with the spanner than most people. So, he can maybe make it function better for a few weeks, then it’s going to leak again.'”

Jamie: Well, I’m sorry, Jo. You’re wrong. She’s wrong!

Ben: There you have it. We were wrong. Jo, she proved us wrong in this interview.

Jamie: No, she’s wrong, Ben! She’s wrong.

[Eric laughs]

Ben: Yeah, she didn’t know what she was talking about.

Micah: You know what this is?

Ben: What’s up, Micah?

Micah: I was actually reading the interview, and I sent this to Laura. So I think Laura just made up a fake Listener Rebuttal to prove that she was right and the rest of us were wrong.

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: Yeah.

[Kevin laughs]


Listener Rebuttal – More on Peeves


Ben: Alyssa, 16, from Fairfax, California, has a related message for us.

“I was thinking about Peeves as the subject was brought up in Episode 61, and it seems logical to me that Peeves is a shape taken from all of the energy from the teenagers as they run around the school. He must have appeared sometime when the first students arrived at Hogwarts, and will only go away when there are no more students with poltergeist energy left. This is why no one has ever gotten rid of him.”

Jamie: That’s a very interesting point.

Eric: That’s the best.

Kevin: It’s very interesting.

Ben: It would kind of make sense…

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: …because he’s mischievous, and every kid – even the goody-goody kids in schools – there’s part of them that wants to rebel, even thought they may not do it all the time.

Jamie: Allegedly.

Eric: Allegedly. Yeah.

Jamie: Allegedly.

Eric: I think Alyssa has definitely struck gold as far as – because poltergeist activity to begin with is energy; usually a child’s energy, actually. And I definitely like the idea that it’s feeding off the mischievous sides of all the students. I think teachers, too. Peeves could be using some or taking some that the teachers can’t do. I don’t know. Because if you look at Book Five, they were kind of glad he was creating mischief. So, I think Peeves could feed off of everybody in the castle. Even Dumbledore.

Ben: Mhm. But I don’t think it’s the – I don’t think it’s the same way that he’s feeding like a Dementor feeds off.

Eric: Oh, no, no, no. Not at all.

Ben: It’s actually just – it doesn’t take away from the energy, it just…

Eric: But he is there because it’s there.

Ben: Of the energy, yeah. Hmmm. That’s interesting. I never really thought of that, but yeah. I think Peeves is what… He’s still good-natured, even though he does some pretty mean things sometimes.

Jamie: Yeah, he wouldn’t drown anyone or kill anyone. He’s just going to drop stuff on their heads. He’s mischievous rather than malevolent.

Ben: Right. Definitely.

Eric: I think he’s malevolent too. Just not murderous.


Character Discussion: Luna Lovegood


Ben: Pale eyes, radish earrings – Luna Lovegood. That’s what this week’s main discussion. Micah, did you want to make a few points?

Micah: Sure. Let’s see.

Kevin: Points as to what?

Eric: By the way, this is the main discussion.

Micah: Sure.

Ben: Well, points as to – like, a little bit of information about her.

Kevin: Just to introduce this?

Ben: Yeah, this is the main discussion, by the way.

Micah: Yeah. Okay. Luna Lovegood is a Ravenclaw. She’s a witch in Ginny’s year who’s considered a bit weird by her classmates. She comes by this reputation honestly; Luna simply isn’t like all the other kids. She dresses unusually, she proclaims her strange beliefs to anyone who will listen, and in some ways she seems to be completely out of touch with what’s going on around her. That was from the HP Lexicon.


Luna’s Name Connection


Jamie: Why don’t we start off with her name? Her name, Luna, obviously has…

Ben: Etymology?

Jamie: …etymology with the moon. And that begs the question, is she related to Lupin?

Ben: I don’t think she’s related in the terms of her bloodline, maybe. Not that way. But maybe JK Rowling is trying to say that there’s some kind of connection between these two.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: Maybe in just their personalities.

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: Well, it could just be that – the moon could just be to perpetuate the Loony Lovegood teasing she receives. It’s all moon, moon-like.

Eric: Well, yeah. Peeves called Lupin “Loony, loony Lupin” or whatever in…

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: …in Movie Three. And that was obviously, I guess, because he was a werewolf and Peeves knew it or because of his moon significance. I think Luna has different moon significances as in she’s always visiting the moon as in she’s always in space.

Jamie: Oh, that’s very good! Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Eric: Yeah, so they are both loony – they are both related to the moon for different reasons.

Ben: Right. But they’re not related, right?

Eric: Right, right, right. I don’t think the Lovegoods…

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: No, no. I agree. Yeah.


Is She Really That Loony?


Ben: But yeah, you brought up how they’re always calling her Loony Lovegood, but is she really as loony as everyone makes her out to be? What do you guys think?

Eric: Yeah. She, she actually is…

[Ben laughs]

Eric: …because… Well no, no. She’s not as – it’s not a bad thing, though. Having a little bit of…

Ben: Well, you know how she’s always believing in like the Ministry conspiracy?

Eric: Well…

Ben: Like Fudge making goblins into pies, having an army of heliopaths, [laughs] and all these – all these things.

Eric: [laughs] Being different is not a crime, necessarily.

Jamie: But it’s not being… Yeah, but it’s – there’s a difference between being different and being crazy.

Ben: But is she crazy, though? That’s the question.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: Yeah, I don’t think she’s crazy.

Eric: She, she has a habit, a tendency…

Kevin: I just think she, she has – well, she has some far-out ideas.

Eric: Certain ones.

Kevin: And because of that, she’s ostracized.

Eric: But if she were…

Micah: But I don’t think she needs to be locked up in a straightjacket or anything like that.

Kevin: Exactly, yeah.

Jamie: I think she does. I’d put her in there.

[Ben and Eric laugh]

Ben: No, no, yeah. It’s definitely the – like you said, it’s more of the… Like, she’s eccentric? Is the word I’m looking for…

Kevin: Yes.

Ben: She’s kind of – she’s a little bit out there. She’s kind of like how some people perceive Dumbledore. It’s the same thing, but…

Jamie: Yeah, but it’s different, though…

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: …because it’s… It is the same, but he is…

Ben: Well, she’s not brilliant like Dumbledore.

Jamie: But yeah, he’s brilliant.

Micah: She’s very open-minded.

Eric: Well, she’s pretty smart, too. Loony has an ability – sorry, Luna has an ability to speak uncomfortable truths and things. She gets past a lot more than other people. Other people would stop short almost and fall short of expressing their mind. Luna, however, knows exactly how she feels and even if it’s crazy or a little outlandish, she is, like, an open person about it but she just gets insulted for having so many different ideas.


The Quibbler


Ben: Right. Well, you know her dad’s newspaper, The Quibbler?

Eric: Yeah. Which doesn’t help being raised by that man.

Ben: Yeah. [laughs] He’s kind of a cook, too, from the way it sounds. [laughs] But the only reliable story that we’ve actually seen The Quibbler produce was in Book Five – at the end of Book Five where they used it to publicize that, you know, Harry did all the interviews.

Jamie: Isn’t it, isn’t it just a plot device, though? It was introduced to provide a method of publishing that isn’t The Daily Prophet that allows Harry to get his story out.

Eric: Well, I think it’s – I think it’s good to know. I think it’s good to know there’s another version of publishing next to The Daily Prophet, because…

Jamie: That doesn’t have the…

Ben: Because The Daily Prophet would sort of…

Eric: Because The Daily Prophet, the Ministry is leaning on the Prophet. And it’s great to see – even if it was a plot device…

Kevin: Yeah, it’s pretty corrupt.

Eric: It’s why I’m not against the idea of The Quibbler. Because people are saying, “Okay, so the Rotfang conspiracy – and Fudge has an army of heliopaths.” Even if, even if he doesn’t, I don’t think that’s the point. The point is to question. You know? “How likely is this?” Could Fudge potentially either have an army of heliopaths or could he just be not doing his job in the other sense of the word? Could he not – could he be hiding something? Is really what that question asks. You know? And…

Micah: So, you think the stories tell something different? Is that what you’re saying?

Eric: Well, I don’t think they’re intended to. I think they’re intended. Somebody actually believes that Fudge has an army of heliopaths, just like somebody believes Sirius Black was Stubby Boardman. They actually believe that stuff, but I’m saying, what you take from it is the minor concepts. You know? Okay, we aren’t supposed to, you know?

Jamie: Some satire is like, I’m sure that The Onion realizes it’s satire. It doesn’t write it believing it. Like The Quibbler probably writes it for entertainment. It’s like, it’s like The Sun over here. It sensationalizes, it exaggerates, it puts questionable facts in, but it doesn’t pretend it’s a broadsheet. It knows it’s a tabloid and so it acts accordingly. The Quibbler probably writes because that’s what their audience wants, so even though it’s not true, they write it knowing it’s not true and write it knowing it’s just for entertainment.

Eric: I don’t know about that. I got the distinct impression that Luna actually believes in nargles and things. So, I don’t know. Like you compare it to The Onion, I would compare it to what’s our main tabloid here? The pointless one.

Micah: The National Enquirer?

Ben: Yeah, National Enquirer.

Eric: National Enquirer. About monkeys from Mars and all sorts of stuff and it’s like…

Ben: [laughs] Yeah.

Eric: In that case, I completely agree with you.

Ben: And then there was…

Eric: They can’t possibly…

Ben: No, no. There was an article in there that said the world’s fattest man has disappeared. It had like, a man that was…

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: …3,000 pounds [laughs] and he disappeared. I don’t know how that happened.

[Jamie laughs]

Eric: Anyway, people, yeah. Definitely those publications I don’t think take themselves seriously, but The Quibbler, that’s why The Quibbler struck me. Because Luna actually purports these kinds of theories, and her father apparently does, too. So, when book sales or rather, magazine sales – issue sales of The Quibbler went up due to Harry’s thing, her father was overjoyed because he could share all his other conspiracies of the government with everybody because he actually believed it.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: So, I think this is an instance where people do actually believe what they write for it.

Jamie: Mhm.

Micah: But do you think that that hurt Harry’s credibility at all?

Eric: Mmmm.

Jamie: No, no.

Micah: Having his story published in The Quibbler?

Jamie: No, no.

Micah: No?

Eric: Mmmm. No, because the way, the way it is, is once it’s published there, everybody knows, why didn’t he do it in The Daily Prophet? Oh, because The Daily Prophet

Jamie: Right, yeah.

Eric: You know? So they can immediately justify it. It doesn’t matter where it’s published. It was actually…

Kevin: And it was very important for The Quibbler because now they have the support of Harry Potter. Harry Potter has just said…

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: … “Hey, I’m giving my story to The Quibbler over The Daily Prophet.”

Jamie: Yeah, and it’s just a confidence in the publication, as well. So, I assume…

Kevin: Exactly.

Jamie: …you know?

Kevin. Right.

Eric: Don’t you just love how Rita Skeeter wrote that article? [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: Poetic justice.


Luna and Ollivander


Ben: Yeah. [laughs] Yeah. Luna also is described as having “pale eyes,” and another character in the series who has a similar description is Ollivander, the wand maker in Diagon Alley. So, do you guys think there could be any connection between them two?

Jamie: [laughs] Well, I know we…

Ben: Those two?

Jamie: …over-analyze here, but…

Eric: I love the idea.

Jamie: …isn’t that kind of like saying that Harry has got black hair. [laughs] So…

Kevin: I have green eyes, so…

Ben: [laughs] Two people with blue eyes have…

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

[Micah laughs]

Eric: Right.

Jamie: They have got to be sisters. Seriously, definitely.

Ben: Yeah. [laughs] They both have blue eyes.

Eric: No, but, guys…

Ben: No, I don’t really know if it’s really that, I’m just saying that JK Rowling – it’s different in a series like this when she’ll use certain descriptive words. You know what I mean?

Micah: Right, right.

Ben: I mean, it’s probably a stretch, but it’s still worth discussing.

Eric: Yeah, pale eyes…

Micah: Well, I was reading…

Eric: Yeah.

Micah:Prisoner of Azkaban last night, and the number of times they said Lupin had pale eyes, and Hermione had pale eyes from studying so much. I mean, do you want to start making connections there, too?

Jamie: Yes, I do.

Eric: Oh, really, Micah? So…

Jamie: He’s her daughter.

Micah: You do?

Jamie: So, she’s his daughter. Oops.

Micah: She’s Hermione’s sister? Ummm…

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: Did you…

[Kevin laughs]

Ben: Yeah, that’s true.

Jamie: They’re one big happy family.

Eric: Did they actually say “pale eyes,” though, Micah? Because I was under the – I believe you, but I was under the impression that was a not widely used term like “pale eyes.” I don’t recall seeing it except for Ollivander and Luna. Did they actually say that for studying?

Micah: I don’t know. Maybe they just said…

Ben: Yeah, I don’t really recall that, but I haven’t…

Micah: …bags under their eyes, or something.

Ben: …read Book Three for a while, and it wasn’t like I was looking for it when I did read it. [laughs]

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: Well, let’s just entertain it for a second here. Luna’s mother was described as being a talented witch who enjoyed experimenting with spells, and it would make sense for Ollivander to be Luna’s grandfather in this case, since he creates wands. I’m not sure if… I’m just reading this from the Writely, but [laughs] I’m not actually sure if that makes much sense. It doesn’t really make logical sense to me. What about you guys? What about you, Kevin Steck? What do you think?

Kevin: I think it’s a far stretch, like we said before. I mean…

Ben: Yeah, I guess we’re going to start making really, really out there predictions.

Kevin: I mean, that’s like grasping at air. [laughs]

Ben: Yeah.

Kevin: There’s – it’s just a single description of a person. I mean, I’d think we would have to have…

Jamie: It’s like grasping at straws with no hands.

Kevin: Exactly. [laughs]

Jamie: At all. So, it’s impossible.

Ben: Yeah.

[Micah laughs]

Ben: Well, okay we’ve established that that is a little bit far out there, but…

Jamie: No, Ben, I think we should reinforce that point. Allegedly.

Ben: [laughs] Allegedly. No. Not only – okay, we’ve established that that is a little bit of a far stretch.

Kevin: Out there.

Jamie: It’s allegedly a bit far-fetched.


Luna’s Connection With Death


Ben: But, but something that isn’t far-fetched is the fact that she does have a strong connection with death. Which is what we saw throughout Order Of The Phoenix, because she can see the Thestrals.

Jamie: Why can she see them, again?

Ben: All those things.

Jamie: Do we know, or do we not know?

Ben: She saw her – who’d she see die?

Jamie: I can’t remember.

Ben: Do you guys know? We need to get this right.

Jamie: Did she see?

Micah: I think her mother, isn’t it?

Ben: Yeah, it was her mother. That’s what I thought, too.

Eric: Yeah, okay. I think it’s unlikely, though, that if Luna’s grandfather is Ollivander, I don’t like to think that Ollivander’s own daughter would be out there in the world testing things to make for her father’s wands. He wouldn’t send her off to go test things.

Jamie: We’ve moved on.

Eric: Blow stuff up.

Jamie: Okay. There’s…

Eric: No, that was just going into the death thing.

Jamie: Oh, sorry. Okay, go on then. Sorry.

Eric: Because her mother died.

Jamie: Okay, yeah, fair enough, fair enough.

Eric: Apparently testing things. So, if it would have been wands for her father, that would have been a little sad. Maybe that’s why Ollivander reserved himself to just phoenix tail and unicorn tail. Phoenix feather, whatever.

Ben: When Harry realizes that Luna can see the Thestrals, too, it makes him feel – it sort of establishes a bond with her, because he doesn’t feel as alone as before. So… [whispers] Yeah. [returns to normal volume] Another thing that Harry and Luna can both do, one of their special talents, I guess. It’s not really a talent, but you know what I mean; how something that they can do, their, what would you call it, Jamie?

Jamie: Uhhh…

Ben: That they’re qualified to do.

Jamie: Their similarities.

Ben: Yeah. Another one of their similarities is with the voices behind the Veil, and she makes a point of reminding him about it. But what’s the difference? I mean the fact that Ginny can hear the voices beyond the Veil, but she can’t see the Thestrals, tells us that they’re two different things.

Jamie: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, definitely.

Ben: Like, two different things qualify you for that. So, what do you think? Do you think it could be you’ve had a near death experience? Because Ginny with…

Jamie: Luna hasn’t though, has she?

Ben: …Book Two. Well, we don’t know.

Eric: Yeah, Ginny has. Well, oh, yeah, I don’t know about Luna.

Jamie: She accidentally choked…

Ben: And Harry, of course, all the time.

Jamie: …on one of her radish earrings, and had to get rushed to hospital. [laughs]

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: So, what else about her connection to death?

Jamie: It’s definitely something. That thing about the Veil, there is clearly something, some type of criteria they’ve got to meet to be able to hear the things. And perhaps, unlike the Thestrals, there are varying degrees of this. So, some people can hear them, some people can hear them and understand them, or whatever. I don’t know.


The Veil is a Lethifold?


Micah: This is sort of going off-track slightly, but we like to do that. So, I’ve gotten a number of e-mails about the Veil actually being a Lethifold. Do you guys…?

Eric: No.

Jamie: Ummm, yeah. It’s the thing – for people who don’t know, it is the creature in tropical climates that sneaks into people’s dwellings and wraps itself around their mouths and suffocates them.

Eric: Right.

Jamie: And then swallows them, leaving no trace of them, whatsoever. So, yeah.

Micah: So, that would be a far stretch?

Ben: That would be a bad way to die…

Eric: There is nothing about whispers, and there’s – if it was a Lethifold it would completely destroy the mythological…

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: …art of the Veil.

Ben: Why would the Lethifold be there for…?

Jamie: It would move as well, probably.

Ben: Yeah, hundreds of years.

Eric: Yeah, they just grabbed one Lethifold and strung it up for studying at the Ministry of Magic. It just doesn’t…


Back to Luna


Ben: [laughs] Right. It doesn’t make sense. Anyways, back to Luna’s connection to death. She has a conversation with Harry at the end of Order of the Phoenix about Sirius. She seems to be the only person who “understands” Harry, and she listens to him and then lets him be – she’s very accepting. Because, she’s probably used to having everybody make fun of her ideas and thoughts, so she kind of seems like the person that you could confide in. Do you know what I mean? Without her criticizing you. It’d just sort of be like, you say it, and she’s…

Kevin: Well that’s because she’s so open-minded.

Ben: She accepts it.

Eric: Well, and she’s been made fun of, herself.

Ben: Yeah, that’s what I said. She’s…

Kevin: Yeah.

Ben: She knows how it feels.

Eric: So she’s not going to openly criticize.


The Social Outcast


Ben: But the thing is, if she’s so understanding of all these people, why is she a social outcast? Do you think it’s because that she has all these loony thoughts?

Eric: Oh, what do you mean? No…

Ben: Or is it the fact that she’s different? It’s because she’s different, right?

Eric: It’s because she’s different, yeah. I mean, she understands people, and stuff, but who says that makes you popular or worth talking to? Usually, it’s the people who are the outcasts, who do get made fun of, who start understanding how people’s minds work. So…

Ben: Yeah, that’s true because they have a lot more time to think about it.

Eric: Well, they have a lot more…

Ben: They’re not caught up.

Eric: Yeah.

Ben: Yeah, they’re not caught up in the social scenes, and all that.

Eric: Right. Exactly.


Luna in Book Seven


Ben: You know, when we do these character discussions, our favorite thing to talk about, of course, is always their connection to Book Seven. Because a lot of the characters we talk about, it just doesn’t seem like there would be much of a connection to the last book, but what about Luna? Do you think that there’s something that she’s going to have a connection to in Book Seven?

Kevin: Well, they introduced her and they really have – JK Rowling really hasn’t told us much about her, so it tends to lead you to believe that we will see more of her, and at least she’ll play some sort of smaller-medium role in the next book.

Eric: Why smaller-medium?

Ben: Well, doesn’t it… Well…

Kevin: Because… Because…

Ben: Okay. What’s the purpose of Luna? Each character that she introduced has to have some sort of purpose, and what do you think that Luna’s purpose is? Is her purpose served already or…?

Micah: Her purpose was to call the last Quidditch match.

Ben: Oh, yeah. [laughs]

Micah: No, I think she has such a strong connection to death, and she’s not afraid of it. And Voldemort, we all know, has a great fear of death. So, I think having somebody like that on his side, Harry is sort of in a position of just having a good ally, maybe.

Ben: Yeah, because it’s like the opposite ends of the spectrum. Because deep down, I think, everyone fears death. You know? It’s like…

Eric: But some more than most. Some more than others.

Ben: Yeah, some more than most. And Harry – Dumbledore thinks death is the next greatest adventure, but maybe Harry hasn’t realized that in his mind, yet. He hasn’t come to terms with well, death is just essentially what – all it is, is just a part of life. And, he hasn’t really come to terms with that, and Luna’s helping him realize…

Micah: Right.

Ben: “Okay, if I do die, it’s going to be for a greater cause, so it’s really not that bad,” and it’s – it will be interesting. So…

Micah: Well, I think the most important thing that she said was that, at the end of Book Five, when she was talking to Harry, that she was going to see her mother again, and that’s what provided her the greatest comfort. And that was what was so important to Harry, because he said to himself, “Well, I’ll see Sirius again, and then I’ll see my parents again.” Sorry, Eric, I didn’t mean to cut.

Eric: No, when was this? I missed… That was… When Luna said she…

Micah: At the end of Book Five.

Eric: She said she’d be seeing her mother again? I forgot about that.

Micah: Right.

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Eric: No, I was going to say Luna, as far as, do you guys think she’s that far in the background? I mean, I was under the impression that…

Ben: Oh, no. After Order of the Phoenix she kind of dropped off the radar. Do you think that…

Kevin: Yeah, she did, yeah.

Ben: Does that kind of prove that…

Eric: I think that…

Ben: …she’s already served her purpose? Or could she come back in Book Seven?

Eric: I think she’ll come back. I think Book Six, why everybody seemed to have fallen off, tapered off, even Tonks and most of the Order was because it was Harry and Dumbledore about Voldemort.

Micah: Yeah, I agree with that.

Eric: It’s my impression still that Luna and Neville, who fought the ending battle in Book Six, would therefore become like a semi – there’s the trio; there’s Harry, Ron, and Hermione. But then I think immediately after is Neville and Luna. Like, immediately after. Like, very close circle. I still see them as very close friends that are going to band together in Book Seven.

Ben: Right, they’re still part of the group, but they’re just not the main members.

Eric: Well, I think a significantly big part.

Ben: Right.

Eric: Well, I think they are main members. I think if there were a main five or a main six, including Ginny, it would be…

Ben: Oh yeah, they would be included.

Eric: Neville, Luna, Ginny, Harry, Ron, Hermione. In reverse order, but yeah.

Micah: I think everyone took a backseat in Book Six to Tom Riddle, because that’s who I really think the book was about. Even more so than Snape being the Half-Blood Prince, so I think a lot of characters…

Eric: Mhm.

Micah: …just got pushed to the back burner.

Ben: Yeah, Book Six was more about us learning about who Voldemort is – that type of thing. So, because Harry has to learn those things in order to have a shot at taking him out in Book Seven, so that’s why we learned those things. That’s why it seemed like everyone else sort of became second tier or behind, like less of a priority in JK Rowling’s mind…

Micah: Right.

Ben: …and in the series.

Micah: And I think that Book Seven will start off where a lot of people wanted Book Six to.

Ben: And where is that?

Micah: Well, sort of after Harry learns everything about the prophecy, you’re sort of expecting him to want to learn more about Sirius and what exactly happened to him. And I just felt that there was a lot of stuff, sort of coming off the end of Book Five, that we thought we were going to get in Book Six and it didn’t happen.

Ben: Yeah, that was a lot of people’s main disappointment with Book Six was, you know? It wasn’t all like they wanted it to be. It was the preparing for the war, I mean there still wasn’t…

Jamie: Yeah, but it was done for a reason.

Ben: …all right.

Jamie: Which we’ll probably find out. It’s like… I mean, she could have just gone straight into the…

Eric: Yeah, and people are dying, and they had that great first chapter, “The Other Minister,: which was great.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: Which was amazing.

Ben: Yeah. That was probably one of my favorite chapters of the series.

Jamie: Yeah, it was very good.

Eric: Honestly, it’s really good.

Ben: Just because the way it starts out is so, like, mysterious, you know? It kind of reminded me of the opening chapter of Book One, when it’s like, you know, that really sucks you in because its like, “Whoa. What’s this all about?”

Eric: Well, yeah and that’s what she said, that she was trying to do a chapter like that for quite a few books, but now we finally got the view, you know? What would it be like to be the British Prime Minister and be told about this magical world and have to keep it a secret and all that stuff.

Jamie: Oh, yeah.

Ben: Yeah.

Eric: I just love the scene where he says, you know, “All my workers are really good.” And then Fudge turns to him and says, “Well, yes they’re ours. They’re wizards; of course, they’re good.” Kingsley Shacklebolt and everything.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: And the Ministry is taking them back. He’s like, “He’s a plant.” Yeah.

Ben: [laughs] Well, we’re digressing a bit here.

Eric: But. No. Yeah, but the inner circle of Luna and stuff, I still think that’s really good. I think it’s safe to say that Luna will play a bigger role in Book Seven and I don’t think she’s tapering off.

Ben: Yeah. I think everyone will. I don’t really think we’re really going to see the disappearance of, especially since Luna was established in Book Five as you said, you know, the next person in line to be, you know, like the main five or six that you brought up.

Eric: Yeah.

Ben: As part of their little group.

Eric: And its been said, you know JKR said that Book Six really felt like Book Seven: Part One.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: Yeah. The novel’s in two halves so…

Eric: Yeah. She was leading, you know, she introduced Slughorn, who was, I guess, one of the final players in this whole plot of what’s going to happen in the final chapter of the book.


Listener Rebuttals – Missing Day


Ben: Okay. Well, you guys, we keep making mistakes. I don’t know how we keep doing it. They were probably a few in that Luna discussion. Yeah, keep sending your e-mails in and tell us what we did wrong. Emery, this is from MySpace, I don’t know how Andrew got a hold of this, but last week we discussed a missing day in the series. How, between Harry’s parents being killed and him being delivered to the Dursley’s, apparently, there was a missing day, and according to Emery:

“October 31st, near midnight, Voldemort attempts to kill Harry Potter after murdering his parents, but his spell rebounds. Voldemort is defeated. November 1st, late evening, Hagrid delivers baby Harry to Dumbledore, who’s waiting at Privet Drive to leave the baby with the Dursleys. There is no missing day. After midnight is November 1st. It is just the next day.”

Jamie: How could we have possibly got that wrong? That’s so obvious. How could we have got that wrong?

Kevin: When did you say this? Last episode?

Ben: This was last week.

Kevin: I could have told you that.

Ben: I don’t know. We just don’t think logically sometimes, I guess. I don’t know.

Jamie: No, we’re just stupid. That is ridiculous. How could we have got that wrong? How could we have thought that between October 31st and November 1st there’s a…

Eric: But there is a missing day theory. There is still a missing day theory.

Jamie: No, there’s not!

Kevin: How is there a missing day?

Eric: I said there’s a theory.

Ben: Do we know when Voldemort killed Harry’s parents though?

Kevin: Yes, the 31st. It was Halloween.

Jamie: Oh yeah. We missed…

Ben: Right, it was Halloween but could it have been, like, 2 AM on Halloween? That’s the thing, because then there still could be a missing day, right?

Jamie: No, there’s not. No.

Kevin: No, because I think…

Jamie: You mean like what, October 32nd, Ben?

Ben: No, like October 31st at 2 AM. You know what I’m saying?

Jamie: I guess.

Kevin: He means it’s like, late, late at night on the 30th into the 31st?

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: I guess, but stuff must have been happening then, like, you know, Order of the Phoenix members contacting each other, stuff going around, you know? It takes a while to get everything sorted out. I don’t think we can say that they’ve missed out a day.

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: Just that we don’t know what happened during that time.

Eric: It’s interesting because…

Micah: Well, actually, there’s a whole editorial, a five-part editorial, that’s written on the lost day by Brandon Ford.

Kevin: Whew.

Micah: And I think that there is actually a day that’s missing. I don’t think he would’ve wrote an entire five-part series if…

Kevin: No, but that’s what…

Micah: in fact… Sorry.

Ben: Unless he’s as dumb as we are.

Jamie: Yeah.

[Ben and Jamie laugh]

Kevin: No. I think that’s what Ben was saying, like the only explanation for if there was a day missing is that if the murder happened at 2 AM on the 31st, meaning you had the whole day of the 31st plus the next day too.

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

Eric: Yeah. The only thing that gets me, people say, you know, that Dumbledore would have needed a day to put all those spells on Privet Drive and definitely all that preparation and all the ancient magic Dumbledore had to invoke. But the problem is, right before Hagrid comes and delivers baby Harry, Jo writes that nothing like this man, nothing like Dumbledore had been seen on Privet Drive before, which kind of implies that he never had never even been there hours before putting up spells.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: Or if he did, he was doing it invisibly. I don’t know.

Kevin: You see the thing is though, do you think it’s plausible that someone, that JK Rowling put in a missing day? I mean…

Jamie: Well, perhaps, and we find out in Book Seven.

Kevin: I think she…

Jamie: It doesn’t sound…

Ben: I think it’s just an oversight.

Jamie: Yeah. It probably is.

Kevin: That’s what I’m saying. I think it’s just, you know, exactly what it seems. It doesn’t…

Jamie: But Eric, going back to what you were saying putting spells on the house, I don’t think it’s the kind of magic where you put spells on it, you invoke this kind of magic so there’s sort of, perhaps, certain conditions that have to be met or, you know, certain conditions and a couple of words have to be spoken, or certain ingredients. I don’t think it’s a normal, normal spell.

Eric: Well, no. It’s just like when Dumbledore and Harry were flying back to the lightning-struck tower and Dumbledore was muttering, you know, different language…

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric:…to clear the shield for them to go in. I think it’s something like that.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: It’s definitely not a matter of [mutters magical language] and he goes in the backyard [mutters magical language]

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: It’s more complicated.

Ben: Hmmm. There may be a quote in terms of the timeline, it may seem that there’s a day that’s missing, but I doubt anything that went on during that day is really pivotal to the series. I may be wrong, I may be eating 50 jumbo sausages with Jamie.

Jamie: [laughs] A bit like me.

[Ben laughs]

Eric: It’s just so elaborate though, and the specific stipulations and conditions under which Harry is protected from Voldemort. “As long as he can call it home?”

Jamie: Oh yeah, it’s very specific though.

Eric: “As long as they give him room space, the Dursleys?” It’s incredibly specific.

Jamie: Shouldn’t we clarify that we don’t actually mean a day missing, we mean a sort of extended period of time.

Eric: A period of time that we don’t know about.

Jamie: We don’t mean October 32nd, we just mean an extended period of time that we don’t know. Nothing’s happening. We haven’t heard anything that’s happening in it.

Ben: Right, right.

Jamie: Okay, cool.


Listener Rebuttal – Jo’s Birthday Updates Telling Us Something?


Ben: Our last listener rebuttal comes from Katie, 14, from the Czech Republic. We have listeners all over. That’s crazy. The subject is, “Who lives, who dies theory.”

“Hey MuggleCasters, I thought of this theory before but I haven’t written in until now. As I’m sure you’re well aware, Jo updates her site with birthdays. We’ve seen Harry, Hermione, Ron, the twins, Molly and many more. However, we have never seen the birthdays for the characters that are already dead in the books. Never once have we seen a birthday announcement for James, Lily, Sirius or Dumbledore. Now, if she’s going to update about Molly or Percy or someone else who isn’t exactly pivotal in the series, you’d think she’d update about these important characters, right? At first, I thought that maybe she was giving us birthdays of characters whose birthday we knew from the book or her site, but then I realized that we have never seen Molly’s birthday in the books. And we know Voldemort’s birthday, but she never updates about him. Do you think she might be giving us a clue as to who lives and who dies? I’d love to hear your thoughts.”

Hmmm. Katie.

Jamie: That’s interesting.

Ben: That’s very interesting, yeah. I mean, I don’t know if it’s really a clue, per se. Maybe she just chooses her favorite character. But she likes Dumbledore though. Hmmm. Has she ever updated for Hagrid?

Jamie: Yeah.

Micah: Yeah, she has. But not for Dumbledore. That’s what I think is pretty interesting. And the site was up before Half-Blood Prince was released, and she never once wished Dumbledore a “Happy Birthday.”

Jamie: Well, that could be why.

Ben: Well, I don’t know if this is intentional, though. I don’t know if it’s intentional that she does that because he’s going to die, you know what I mean?

Jamie: Well, it’s kind of like…

Ben: What about Ginny? What about Ginny? Have we ever seen a Ginny birthday? We have, haven’t we?

Jamie: I think we have, yeah. We’ve never seen, but it’s interesting, though, you’re right, we haven’t seen a Voldemort birthday. But if – I don’t think he’d celebrate it. I can’t see his Death Eaters waking him up with a breakfast in bed.

Ben: And a cake.

Jamie: Bringing in a cake, oh yeah.

Micah: [laughs] But she has wished a “Happy Birthday” to Draco.

Jamie: Yeah.

Micah: So… And we consider him to be…

Eric: And that’s just it. Because now we have to – that’s why I like this so much. We can go back and see whose birthdays did she put up, and does that – you guys were all there at “Harry, Carrie and Garp,” when somebody asked her – this is when she gave the Harry thing away. Somebody asked her who she’d invite to a dinner table, and she said, “Oh, wait, I know who dies,” and stuff. She judges things and she judges her own actions…

Jamie: Yeah, she does.

Eric: …and how she can answer questions and how she would do things, based on who lives. So, birthdays could be this fascinating idea from Katie, 14, of Czech Republic, who said…

[Ben laughs]

Eric: …that this is cool.

Ben: Yeah.

Eric: Now we can go back and see if it – I think it makes sense. It makes sense to me.

Jamie: Oh, it is. It’s very clever.

Ben: Yeah, very clever. I never would have thought of it.


British Jokes of the Day


Ben: Now it’s time for everybody’s favorite segment: Jamie’s British Joke of the Day. We haven’t done one of these in a while.

Jamie: English, English. English Joke of the Day.

Ben: English Joke of the Day.

Jamie: Apparently, sorry, allegedly English Joke of the Day. I have – I got an e-mail today, well, actually a while ago now, from Skylar Warren. Actually, let me do that again. I won’t say her last name. I actually got an e-mail a while ago from Skylar, which had the subject, “All puns intended.” It’s like a kind of…

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: It’s a load of jokes disguised as puns, and I thought these were so funny. I was literally on the floor when I read some of these. Here are a few of them. “Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married. The ceremony wasn’t up to scratch, but the reception was excellent.” [laughs]

[Everyone laughs weakly]

Micah: Ha, ha.

[Jamie laughs]

Eric: God, Jamie.

Jamie: “A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, ‘I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.'” Come on, that’s brilliant.

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: How can you not laugh at these? These are so good.

Ben: No. I didn’t quite get it at first.

Jamie: These are – okay. [laughs] Okay, okay, okay. “Two Eskimos, sitting in a kayak were cold, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly, it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it.”

Ben: Ha, ha, ha.

Eric: I don’t get that.

Jamie: Okay, there’s a phrase, “You can’t have your cake and eat it.”

Eric: Oh, okay.

Jamie: So, it’s basically. Okay.

Eric: Yeah, I just hadn’t heard that, okay.

Jamie: Okay. Okay. This is my personal favorite. “A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the front manager came out of his office and asked them to disperse. Angrily, they said, ‘Why?’ as they moved off. ‘Because,’ he said. ‘I can’t stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.'”

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: That’s funny.

Jamie: Okay, and a couple more. Finally, there was this one person, who sent twenty different puns to his friends with the hope that at least ten of them would make them laugh, no pun intended.

Ben: No pun intended, oh, that’s funny. [laughs]

Jamie: Thank you, Skylar.

Kevin: Took me awhile there.

Jamie: I thought they were awesome, so thank you.

Ben: Those were great British jokes, Jamie, or English jokes.

Kevin: Yeah.

Ben: Or allegedly English jokes.

Jamie: Allegedly English. Thank you. Okay.


Voicemails – Reader’s Perspective


Ben: Well, since Kevin finally got his stuff together, the voice mails are back this week. Woo!

Kevin: Oh yeah. The voice mails we’re using this week are the ones we were supposed to be using last week, but you guys never used them. So…

Ben: Here is our first voice mail.

[Audio]: Hey guys. This is Daniel here from Edinburgh, Scotland, and I was reading the Philosopher’s Stone again, and I was noticing that on the first page it says, and I quote, “When Mr. and Mrs. Dursley woke up on a dull, gray Tuesday, our story starts.” Now this makes me think that the Harry Potter novels are just being told by a character in the book. Now J.K. does not use this style anywhere else in the books. It seems to be hinting at the fact that a character in the novels is telling Harry Potter’s life, and we’ll find out who this is in the end. I don’t know if it has any significance, but it’s really been bugging me, and I’d like to know what you think. Okay, I love the show, and by the way, I was in the United States over the last couple weeks and I bought Lucky Charms cereal for the first time, and I can tell you, Jamie, I quite agree with you. They are an amazing cereal. I brought three boxes home with me. Thanks, very much. Cheers! Bye!

Jamie: [laughs] I have to say, Daniel, back to you, your accent’s awesome, and I’m glad you enjoy Lucky Charms.

[Ben laughs]

Eric: Well, it is in third person to begin with, but he asks if we’ll find out who the narrator is and stuff. Based on that, and how she sometimes says, “you wouldn’t think this” or comparisons. Like I said, when we were doing chapter-by-chapter, we called them “Rowlingisms” or something. Just something where she inflected herself to tell the story.

Jamie: Rowlingism, yeah.

Kevin: Yeah, it’s sort of out of context, kind of.

Eric: It’s not like an entity, you’re just supposed to, you know? Sometimes Stephen King sometimes writes like, “I think that you would have known that this person did that…” Something like that.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: It’s not like he’s really a character, it’s like, an omniscient, is it? An ever present kind of thing that keeps a story going. I don’t think it’s like an entity we’re going to find out who is telling…

Ben: Right. I think it’s just a narrator or a main…

Eric: It is an all knowing narrator, which is what the actual tense of the books is; third person omnipresent or something.

Micah: Doesn’t that happen in the beginning of Book Six, too?

Eric: I think so. There’s all these – there are moments where she just will say, “I think he did this,” or you know, and compare things. It just keeps the story going, but it’s not necessarily like Lemony Snicket where, you know, Lemony Snicket is…

Kevin: There’s a single, yep.

Eric: …a character narrator.

Ben: And see, the way that the book begins is that’s actually where the story – like, the story is already taking place, Harry’s already 11-years old. That’s just telling you the back story of what happened. There has to be some way to explain that without having, you know, like a page that says “eleven years later,” you know? [laughs] They can’t do that, so they have to, you know?

Kevin: Yep.

Micah: Right. Harry’s not going to be able to tell what happened at that point.

Ben: Thanks for your question.

Eric: So, we don’t think she’s actually an entity that’s going to be revealed in the books, like “Oh my god, it’s Snape!” You know, telling the story.

Kevin: Right.

Ben: Thanks for your question.


Voicemail – Time-Turners


Ben: Here’s our next voice mail.

[Audio]: Hey MuggleCasters, this is Kaitlin, 15, from Maryland. This is in response to the everlasting time discussion that has been going on for the past two episodes. You said something about how technically you could go very far into the past, but then you wouldn’t live long enough to go back to your own time period. My question is, couldn’t you also go forward in time? It’s called a Time-Turner, not a “Time-Back-Turner,” so one could technically go forward in time if they were so far in the past that they would die of old age before returning to their own place. All they would need to do is turn it forward instead of turning it backwards. Just wondering what you guys thought of this? Thanks so much! You guys brighten up my day! Oh, and also, in Hercules the Fates don’t sing and dance. You probably got them mixed up with the Muses. Thanks again!

Eric: [laughs] It’s like the “Time-Back-Turners.” That’s the next band to come out; Dumbledore and the Time Back Turners. They’re going to start, the lights are going to shine, their backs will be turned, and the audience is “turn back, turn back.”

Jamie: [laughs] Funny.

Eric: She says… Her question is can you turn forward in time with a Time-Turner?

Jamie: No, you can’t.

Eric: But it’s called a Time-Turner, not a “Time-Back-Turner.”

Jamie: Kevin, you’ll probably know more about this than me, but isn’t it, it’s impossible to – oh no, wait. Sorry, I’m thinking about something else. It’s impossible to go back in time, only forward, but then we’re talking about Harry Potter here, so that theory’s completely gone.

Kevin: Right.

Eric: Well, if you look at the H.G. Wells, The Time Machine, I think how he went forward in time, he… It was just a matter of…. What happened was the capsule that he was in was protected from all things that would go on, and he was actually in some kind of hyper-space time. In other words, he actually was there for thousands of years while the buildings around him crumbled, and he actually ended up in the future underneath tons of rock.

Ben: Another correlation to time travel in the book comes in Book Four when we see Fred and George accurately predict a score. It’s really obscure. They say, “We think Ireland is going to win, but Krum is going to get the Snitch.” so we think they had a Time-Turner there to travel, too.

Eric: Allegedly.

Ben: I’m pretty sure they did. It makes a lot of sense.

Eric: But the question is did they go…

Ben: But they would have to go forward in time, wouldn’t they?

Eric: Oh, that’s true. Yeah.

Kevin: Right. So, I think it’s plausible.

Eric: Yeah, that’s true.

Kevin: There’s no real way to tell without…

Ben: Or wait, wait. Could Fred and George have gone back in time to make the bet?

Kevin: Have gone back in time to replace their bets? Yeah, replacing the bet.

Eric: Oh, that’s right.

Ben: See, it’s all confusing.

Jamie: They couldn’t have actually known unless they knew, so…

Kevin: I think we’re going to give people a headache again.

Ben: Yeah, sorry about that.

Ben: Fred and George could’ve gone back in time. I don’t know.

Eric: That’s really… But, yeah. So, once you’re back in time you have to live because we’ve only seen it on such a small scale, so would you actually have to live the time you’re in, or could you actually go back in the future again?

Ben: I don’t know.

Eric: Like say they went down a couple days…

Micah: I think you have to live through it.

Eric: Are you sure? Because “Time-Turner,” she said, it’s not the “Time Back-Turner.” I love that.

Micah: But we don’t know that it’s the “Time Forward-Turner” either. We’ve never been shown an example where it says “So-and-So went forward in time.”

Kevin: Okay, let’s go to the next voicemail.

Ben: Before I get a… Yeah. [laughs] That’s probably a good idea.

Kevin: I think we’re going to give people headaches.


Voicemail – Vernon Doesn’t Recognize It’s Not Halloween


[Audio]: Hey, MuggleCast people. I was just thinking about something, and it bugged me, so I so I decided I would call you, because I love the show. So, Voldemort was taken down on October 31st, right, and then Vernon Dursley goes about his day and we learn about his whole day on November first. He sees all these people in weird outfits, and I just realized that never once does he say anything like “Halloween was yesterday! These people are crazy!” There’s never any mention of, you know, Halloween. Which, I don’t know, maybe this is? Thanks a lot! Love the show! Bye!

Eric: Dursley – Vernon should’ve thought that it was absurd, not that they were dressed up in cloaks walking the streets. “The get-ups you saw on young people these days,” but the fact that they were late for Halloween. That should have been brought up. It definitely should have been, and especially on the news. If Dursley – Vernon didn’t say it, the news people should say. You know, people got a little after, post-Halloween kind of cheer. Jamie, they do celebrate Halloween, right, in Britain? I mean, yeah.

Jamie: Of course, yeah.

Kevin: No, they don’t celebrate Halloween.

Eric: Well, they said Burning Day, because they were even talking about Burning Day being November the 5th, and so…

Ben: Hmmm.

Eric: What the heck?

Ben: Well, maybe he doesn’t like to talk about… Maybe, like if they are the kind of people that don’t want to acknowledge the existence of these weird people called wizards, they don’t want to acknowledge anything that’s abnormal or different from them. So…

Jamie: Exactly. And Halloween…

Ben: It could make sense for them to go “Oh, Halloween is a bunch of stupid!” You know?

Eric: Yeah, but you should still recognize that it happened. Like the people like Scrooge, who knows it’s Christmas even though he hates it. He sits in the house. You have to recognize the fact that Halloween was just a few days ago, so it definitely should’ve been mentioned.

Jamie: Yeah.

Eric: Because later JKR says… Do you think it was an afterthought that they were killed on Halloween, or how was that done? Because, well, they say that in Book One that it was Halloween night, don’t they? Because Hagrid tells…

Micah: But my question is, in relation to that, when did Harry show up?

Eric: Oh.

Micah: Was it the following day?

Kevin: Well, yes, because it was November 1st. It was the night of November first, right?

Eric: Well, Hagrid…

Kevin: Hagrid dropped Harry off.

Eric: Yeah. In the book version, he tells Harry the whole story in the cabin of Voldemort and stuff. I think then he says “Halloween night you were…” It just seems so strange that Vernon didn’t say…

Kevin: That he didn’t mention it, exactly.

Ben: I know. I can’t think of any logical explanation of why he wouldn’t mention it.

Eric: Interesting.

Kevin: Well…

Eric: Nobody did. You know? The owls flying everywhere.

Kevin: That’s the thing. Yeah.

Eric: They could have turned it into this big “Oh, it’s a day late, Halloween.

Ben: Yeah.

Eric: Maybe we should propose the whole holiday changes a day off due to these new events.” Nobody was saying that, that we know of. That we heard.

Ben: Yeah.

Eric: But, it’s a really big thing that Halloween was a bad thing for Harry. So…

Kevin: It seems a little strange.

Eric: It seems surreal. It’s… Yes.

Kevin: But I don’t know why – I don’t know. There’s no real reason to – no real explanation to it without hearing it from Jo.

Ben: Yeah. Hmmm, hmmm, hmmm.

Kevin: Good point.

Ben: Yeah, thank you for sending that in. And we have one last voicemail.


Voicemail – Reading Book Seven


[Audio]: Hey guys, I had a question for you. I know that when all the previous books all came out, we all read them that night at midnight, and we didn’t put the book down until we finished it. But I’m thinking that when Book Seven comes out I might not want to do that. I know it would be hard for you guys because of the site and everything, but wouldn’t you want to savor the last book or would you still rush through it because it’s so hard to stop and put it down anyway? Love to hear your thoughts. Thanks, bye!

Ben: Jamie, didn’t BBC do an interview with you?

Jamie: Yeah. For anyone that’s listening and doesn’t understand this, I did an interview awhile back and they asked me how long it would take me…

Eric: We heard this story.

Ben: Yeah. Actually, Andrew put the audio in a previous show.

Jamie: Oh, right.

Ben: Anyway, anyway, they asked him – in case there’s some of you who aren’t up-to-speed with the shows.

Jamie: Okay, I had an interview with the BBC awhile back, and they asked me how long do I think it’s going take me to read Order of the Phoenix. And I couldn’t say, “Well, I might spend a couple of hours reading it, and then go to McDonald’s, then have a rest, then have a cup of coffee then take my time.” So, I just said “About four hours, maybe,” which of course was a complete overestimate. Sorry, underestimate.

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: It took me a lot, lot longer, but yeah. Basically.

Kevin: Completely impossible. Yeah.

Jamie: And now Ben brings that up whenever he can to humiliate me.

Kevin: Of course.

Ben: Mhm.

Eric: But I don’t think anyone can – can you guys seriously, the first time you’re though it, can you speed-read the Harry Potter books?

Jamie: No.

Ben: I just can’t do it. I mean, I’d rather enjoy it and savor it.

Eric: When there’s a new book out, yeah, I’m trapped. I’m forced to go through in the pace that my mind creates the images for me. I can’t…

Jamie: But Eric, don’t forget, some media sources have to get reviews out within six hours, so they employ people who read at a million words a second.

Eric: Yeah, I get that, but it’s just complete lack of grasping any of the things she’s saying.

Jamie: Not if you – mo, if you can’t read that fast, then fair enough.

Eric: If you skim it, you get plot.

Jamie: There’s a difference between skimming and speed-reading.

Kevin: Yeah, but the question is, guys, the question is; are you going to be rushing through Book Seven when it gets released?

Eric: No.

Jamie: No, we’re going be taking out time.

Micah: No.

Kevin: Well, I’m not. I’m sure we’ll know half the book like two weeks before it’s released, but… [laughs]

Ben: I don’t know, I’d say…

Kevin: I would take my time.

Ben: Yeah, I’m probably going to…

Kevin: I took my time with Book Six. So, I mean…

Ben: I’m going to take my time a little bit more than I did with previous books. Book Five I stayed up all night. Book Six I spent…

Kevin: It will probably take me two days.

Ben: Yeah, Book Six I spent about two, two-and-a-half days. But I’ll probably, probably something familiar with Book Seven.

Kevin: Yeah.

Jamie: I usually do it in like…

Ben: What about you, Jamie?

Jamie: Just like, I remember I got Half-Blood Prince at like – it was in the evening. It was like at 8 P.M. or something like that. Then we got back and I finished it at midday, without a break.

Ben: Yeah, that wraps up this week’s voicemails. Thanks to everyone who sent something in.


Show Close


Ben: Remember you can dial 1-218-20MAGIC for you U.S. listeners and I have the UK numbers here somewhere. I’m used to Andrew just rattling them off.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: If you live in the United States you dial 1-218-20MAGIC. If you live in the United Kingdom you can dial 020-8144-0677. If you live in Australia [repeats in Australian accent] Australia, please dial 0280025668. And also you can SKYPE a voicemail question to us to the username “MuggleCast” you can hear Andrew’s lovely voice on there. You can e-mail us at MuggleCast dot com. There’s a contact form on there and also if you want to send us anything please dial – no don’t dial anything. Send something to…

[Eric Laughs]

Ben: …MuggleCast PO Box 223 Moundridge, Kansas 67107. I got a package this past week, from – I got another box of Lucky Charms.

Jamie: Awww, thank you.

Ben: And someone else sent in Christmas ornaments for us to put up on our trees which I will get sent out.

Kevin: Awww, nice.

Ben: So…

Jamie: What for Christmas 2015?

Eric: Next Christmas.

Ben: Well actually, actually they made that joke in the letter. It said…

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: “I’m hoping that you’ll have these by Christmas 2008.” So…

Jamie: Well, Ben…

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: …somebody sent in a message. I can’t remember who it was, it said that when I was complaining last show that I couldn’t grow any facial hair, they said they would mail a beard for me to the PO Box but, also said that…

Micah: [sighs] Geez.

[Show music begins]

Jamie: …by the time you sent it to me I’ll be able to grow real…

Ben: Be able to grow a real beard.

Jamie: Yeah, yeah in about two days.

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: So, yeah, it’s a pointless plan.

Ben: No, but no, Jamie, you’re still going to look like a baby forever. For life.

Jamie: Well, that can’t be bad. That can’t be bad. I won’t complain.

Ben: [laughs] Okay, well, that wraps up MuggleCast Episode… What is this now, 62?

Eric: 62.

Kevin: 2.

Eric: What are we going to call this episode? We really haven’t found…

Ben: 62? I don’t… I don’t know.

Kevin: “Allegedly.”

Jamie: “Allegedly.”

Eric: “Allegedly.” “Allegedly MuggleCast.”

Ben: “Allegedly MuggleCast” there you have it.

Kevin: Alright.

Ben: So yeah, for everyone here at the MuggleCast Central, I’m Ben Schoen.

Kevin: I’m Kevin Steck.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Eric: I’m Eric Scull.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Ben: Yeah, Micah. Join us next week for Episode 63. Andrew might be back. With any luck he won’t. No, I’m just kidding. [laughs] Yeah.

[Kevin laughs]

Eric: Is this first episode he’s missed?

Ben: No, no this is like, the fourth.

Kevin: No

Micah: No.

Eric: Yeah.

Jamie: Okay.

Eric: Fourth. Got in the last five

Kevin: All right.

Ben: Yep, bye.

Kevin: Goodbye.

Jamie: Bye

Micah: Bye

Eric: Bye, everybody.


Bloopers


Jamie: I remember I got Half-Blood Prince at like – it was in the evening, it was like at 8 P.M. or something like that. Then we got back and then I finished it a midday without a break. So…

Ben: Geez. Did you think you were some bad*** or something?

Jamie: Yes, Ben that was precisely what I was thinking when I was reading it. I wasn’t concentrating on the…

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: …huge fights at the end or…

[Micah laughs]

Jamie: …the death of one of my favorite characters. I was just thinking of how much of a bad*** I was.

Ben: [laughs] How cool you were…

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Ben: …because you read the book.

Jamie: Exactly, because I stayed up all night. Ooh, yeah.

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: That’s exactly it. No, no, wait, in all seriousness. Yeah, yeah I thought I was a bad***.

Ben: ***

Jamie: I felt bad***.

Eric: Bad***, butt holes.

Jamie: No, no I just, you see, Emerson was up as well, so I thought well I can’t have everyone else reading it, so then they can’t talk about it. So I thought well, you know, I’ll stay up and do it as well. It was enjoyable actually.

Ben: Imagine how mad people would have been if they didn’t finish the book before they interviewed her.

Jamie: Well, exactly. They had to. They had to finish it. I thought I would as well then.

———————–

Written by: Micah, Adrienne, Allison, Amanda, Briana, Jessica, Judy, Mandie, Margaret, Martina, Matt, Megan, Roni, Samantha, Sarah, Shannon and Shelly

Transcript #61

MuggleCast 61 Transcript


New Show Intro


Andrew: Domain names from GoDaddy.com are up to 70% less than the competition. Plus, each domain includes free hosting with a website builder, a free blog, complete email, and much more. Plus, as a MuggleCast listener, enter code “MUGGLE” when you check out, and save an additional 10% on any order. Some restrictions apply. See site for details. Get your piece of the Internet today, at GoDaddy.com.

Andrew [Show Intro with new music in background]: Because we all got some candy in our bellies, this is MuggleCast Episode 61 for October 31st, 2006 – Halloween edition.

[New music continues]

Andrew: [in a spooky voice] Oooooooh! Welcome to MuggleCast Halloweeeen edition! Ooooooooh! Hey, guys, what’s with this new music?

Ben: It’s sweet.

Jamie: Ooooooh! I like it. I like it very much.

Laura: I like it a lot. I think it’s great stuff.

Andrew: I like it, too.

Jamie: Laura, I like it more than you.

Andrew: I have to try the bass line.

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: Yeah. Hey, Andrew.

Andrew: Yeah?

Jamie: Did you use your half an amp – half a watt amplifier…

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: …to record that? [laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] Yes, yes. I used my small little amp to produce this bass.

Jamie: For all people listening: Andrew, in his room, has an amp that
it literally the size of a sort of cell phone. It’s absolutely tiny.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: Well, it’s a bit bigger.

Andrew: A cell phone? All right, I think you’re exaggerating. [laughs]

Jamie: I’m exaggerating very, very slightly. Very slightly.

Ben: What did I say about it? I said something.

Andrew: I don’t know.

Jamie: You said that it was a one-watt amp, which is a bit of a high estimate I think, Ben, really.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] Guys, come on. It’s like ten. Give me a break. I’m going to buy a new one.

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Andrew: Sorry, it came with the guitar. It’s a practice amp.

Laura: That’s pretty hardcore stuff, Andrew.

Andrew: Anyway, we have a special Halloween show for everyone today,
including some hot gossip on Laura Mallory that’s going to get everyone!

Jamie: Yeah. This is steaming hot gossip.

Andrew: Yeah. Ooo! Ooo! Everyone’s going to be like, “Tehe! Gossip! I love gossip!” We also hope you’re enjoying our new Intro music. [pause while music plays in background] I’ll take that as a, “no.”

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

[Jamie hums the theme music]

[Music continues playing]

Andrew: I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Andrew: And now over to Micah Tannenbaum for the past week’s top Harry Potter news stories.


News


[Audio excerpt from Sorcerer’s Stone]: Troll in the dungeon!

Micah: Oh, really? Good thing I’m not working down there today. But the rest of the transcribers are. Well, good luck!

Goblet of Fire has received two nominations: Best Feature Film and Bafta
Kids’ Vote, in this year’s children’s Bafta Awards. The awards ceremony will take place on November 26th in London.

HBO has opened a contest where you could win tickets to the Order of the
Phoenix US premiere next July, including 500 dollars in spending money and
transport plus accommodation. This contest is only open to US residents. To enter, head over to MuggleNet.com.

And while you’re over there be sure to check out MuggleShop.com for all your HP merchandise needs. With thousands of products to choose from, if you can’t find a Harry Potter product there, either it doesn’t exist, it’s a dumb product idea, or we’re just not allowed to sell it. I’m glad I get paid by the advertisement.

Speaking of, we’re proud to announce that the first-ever book written by MuggleNet
staff is now available for pre-order for only $11.85 through partner
Alivan’s. The book is titled, What will happen in Harry Potter 7? Who lives? Who dies? Who falls in love? And how will the adventure finally end?

Our fully-customizable Order of the Phoenix countdown is now available.
You can change the countdown to your country’s release date. More countries
and dates will be added as they become available.

Speaking of the fifth movie, Empire magazine’s latest edition included a
three-page spread, where director David Yates spoke about the length of the
film. He said: “The book’s huge, but it actually distills quite easily. That said, I’ve shot a movie that’s probably over three hours, so I’ll have to lose 45 minutes in the edit.” Blasphemy! Yates also discusses Imelda Staunton and Evanna Lynch.

Finally, “We Love The Royle Family Sun,” a special program about the The
Royle Family sitcom, aired this past week on BBC 1, and Jo Rowling made a
guest appearance. We have a video available for you online.

That’s all the news for this October 31, 2006, Halloween edition of
MuggleCast – be sure to check out the Halloween layout on MuggleNet.com – back to the show!

Andrew: All right, thank you, Micah.

Micah: You’re welcome.


News Discussion: Movie Length


Andrew: We’re going to try something new this week. We are going to talk
about the news a little bit because it’s a good way to keep the show a
little fresh week to week, and this way we can have a chance to gossip about [switches to girly voice] the latest Harry Potter stories, guys!

Jamie: Yeah! Yeah!

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: So, one of the big stories this week was a new interview with
David Yates, where he said that there was going to be a good 45 minutes of
film that they shot that is going to have to be cut!

Laura: What?!

Jamie: He was talking specifically about his length, which I always like
it when men talk about length, because, really, you know, you can’t really
talk about a film, review a film if it’s too long or too short. I think you better keep them into certain categories. There’s more that can be packed into a four or five hour film, so it’s impossible to compare it with a one hour film, because it’s completely different. The plot’s different. You can have a beginning, a middle, and an end and then more in a four hour film, whereas you can’t really in a one hour film.

Andrew: Right, right. That could be said about a lot of things.

Jamie: Yeah, definitely.

Andrew: But, I mean, with this – with the movie – why is WB so concerned about keeping it at about a two-and-a-half hour range? Because that really seems…

Ben: It encourages more people to go out and watch it.

Jamie: Yeah, and it’s continuity, as well.

Ben: Parents don’t want to take their kids to a film that’s going to be
over three hours long.

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Laura: Yeah. Kids get squirmy.

Ben: Because it’s going to be like, “Oh, geez. There’s no way he’s going to
sit through this,” and, “Oh, geez. I don’t want to put up with him this long.” So… [laughs]

Andrew: I guess, but then look at Titanic. And how long was
Titanic?

Laura: Yeah, but Titanic wasn’t geared – they weren’t trying to
gear that towards children.

Andrew: No, but adults sat through the whole thing.

Laura: Adults, not kids. [laughs]

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: Well, don’t you think kids would sit through the Harry Potter
film? I thought the concern was the parents would not want to sit through
it.

Laura: No, I think that…

Andrew: Granted, they probably wouldn’t.

Laura: Well, I mean think about it. A five-year-old? I mean…

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Andrew: Yeah, that’s… That’s…

Laura: Sitting through a three-and-a-half, four hour movie.

Jamie: And also it’s like when it goes into a four or five hour movie,
it turns into a new thing.

Laura: Mhm.

Jamie: Like the third Lord of the Rings is known for
being a long film. Or, there’s one film, I can’t remember what it is, it’s like, six hours, and then people – it becomes known for being so long instead of as a film.

Ben: Gone With the Wind.

Jamie: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Laura: Mhm.

Jamie: For an example, Gone With the Wind is
like, three hours, 50 minutes or something. And then – that isn’t a film; it’s a marathon film.

Laura: Not to mention, the longer the movie is, the more people are
going to expect for it to contain, you know, from the books.

Jamie: Yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah.

Laura: Little facts that would’ve normally be left out. And we know that
directors, especially – I can’t believe I forgot his name – the Goblet of
Fire
director. [laughs]

Andrew: David Yates?

Ben: Oh, Mike Newell.

Andrew: Mike Newell.

Laura: Mike Newell.

Jamie: Oh, Laura, you call yourself a fan?

Laura: It totally slipped my mind, but for instance, you know, he said
that the big theme in this one was the boarding school kind of element to
it.

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

Laura: So, he took those pieces, and Alfonso Cuaron said that the big theme in Prisoner of Azkaban was Harry…

Jamie: Was shrunken heads.

Micah: Was the Whomping Willow?

Jamie: Yeah.

Laura: [laughs] No! Harry transforming from a child into a teenager. So, they’re just picking out the main story element that they want the movie to focus around.

Jamie: Do you know, I think it’s funny when people like, speak like, “And I do think this movie is incredibly important for the character development and how the plot progresses.” When I watch a film, I just watch it. I don’t think about these things.

Andrew: Right, right. You want entertainment. [laughs]

Jamie: I’ve never… Exactly. I’ve never ever thought about the development of the character as a whole, and their personal struggle against the forces of evil. I just watch it.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs]

Laura: Yeah, But the thing is…

Jamie: Maybe I’m just dumb, yeah?

Laura: …if the character – Jamie, though, if development is good, that makes the movie entertaining.

Jamie: So, back to what David Yates was saying about that he’s recorded a three hour film, so he’s going to have to cut 45 minutes of it, which, for the non-mathematically inclined among you, means that it should be two hour, fifteen minute film.

Ben: Now that’s stupid. Throw in that extra fifteen.

Andrew: Yeah, I think they would go for two-and-a-half. I mean and granted, maybe WB will finally pull the stick out of their butt and say, “Hey, let’s just go for three hours.”

Jamie: Yeah. Three hours would be okay.

Laura: I think they’re going to have to eventually. I mean…

Ben: No, why would they? Why would they?

Andrew: Especially with…

Ben: Order of the Phoenix is the longest book…

Andrew: With the final book?

Jamie: Yeah, but Book Seven, Ben, is going to be huge, and there’s going to be, like, an epilogue at the start…

Laura: Well, I mean, Ben’s right…

Andrew: It’s not going to be the biggest book; she already said that herself.

Laura: Just because it’s not the biggest book doesn’t mean the content wouldn’t take up a lot of screen time.

Andrew: You have to send it off properly.

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Andrew: You have to send it off properly. Just imagine the ending.

Ben: Well, no. They’re going to make as many cuts as possible to make it two-and-a-half hours. That’s what I think.

Jamie: Yeah, but if you’re going to sit through a two-and-a-half hour film, wouldn’t you sit through a three hour film? It isn’t like you’re going to…

Ben: Not necessarily. There’s a rating. With anything there’s a standard. For example, with the radio the amount of time is like, three minutes and thirty seconds. That’s like the average length for a radio song. Anything past that is considered too long.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: So, even if it’s just four minutes. So, if you have a movie that’s three hours, some people aren’t going to like sitting through that last 30 minutes.

Jamie: Well, I guess. Yeah.

Micah: But I think we all agreed, though, with, Goblet of Fire, it was very fast paced through that entire time.

Laura: Yeah.

Micah: It wasn’t like you felt like you were really sitting there.

Andrew: It was. Especially the opening. They rushed through all that. I mean the Quidditch World Cup mainly. That was the biggest thing, but there were a lot of cuts in that. They were kind of obvious, too.

Laura: Yeah.

Micah: Yeah, I agree with Jamie. I think, what’s the real difference? If you’re there for two-and-a-half hours, who cares if you’re there for 25 more minutes?

Laura: Well, that’s also coming from our point of view. We’re Harry Potter dorks. It’s sad to say, but I don’t think that they’re only thinking about appealing to the book fans; they’re thinking about general audiences, too.

Andrew: They can’t think about the book fans because of…

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: If you think about just the fans in general, what do they want? A longer movie.

Laura: Yeah, exactly.

Andrew: They’ll sit through, well…

Ben: Well, what’s it about? What’s it about, okay? Is it about pleasing the fans, or is it about boosting the bottom line?

Laura: Or making money?

Andrew: Yeah, yeah. Well, that’s true.

Jamie: It’s about both. It’s a combination of both.

Andrew: It is, but you know WB does not give priority to the fans.

Laura: No, no, of course not. [laughs]

Andrew: Like, you look at Lord of the Rings. There’s extended versions of the movie on the special two disk DVD and you get the whole thing. They really – Peter – or what was the director’s name?

Laura: Peter Jackson.

Ben: Peter Jackson.

Andrew: Peter Jackson. He really did care about the fans.

Jamie: Oh yeah.

Andrew: And that’s why a lot of people did love his work on the films, but then again, there’s a different director for each of these films, and it’s up, really, to WB how much goes in.


News Discussion: Extra Order Scenes on DVD?


Andrew: So, with that said, can we expect to see this all on the DVD? Because that would really be the way to pay the fans back.

Ben: I doubt it.

Laura: No, I don’t think so.

Andrew: Yeah. 45 minutes of content. That’s a lot for extra deleted scenes.

Ben: Well, how much – do we know how much extra footage there was for…

Andrew: Goblet of Fire?

Ben: Yeah, Goblet of Fire or Prisoner of Azkaban?

Andrew: What, 20 minutes worth, maybe?

Laura: I think the DVD that had the most extra footage was the Chamber of Secrets one; there were a lot of extra scenes included on the Chamber of Secrets DVD, but it doesn’t amount to 45 minutes, and none of the other DVDs did.

Jamie: None of them nearly.

Andrew: Yeah. I was pretty happy with the Goblet of Fire DVD. That had a lot of extra bonus features. A lot of behind the scenes stuff.

Ben: But seriously, though. I think I heard somewhere that any extra footage they film that was originally going to go in the movie – they cut out – actually does make it to the DVD.


Prisoner of Azkaban on ABC


Andrew: Hmmm. Okay. In other news, Prisoner of… – I wanted to bring up this story because I really want to know the answer to my question. Prisoner of Azkaban aired on ABC the other day, and you know how some people… Does anyone care? Does anyone watch it? Like, the fans? Because it seems like…

Laura: Well, why? You’ve got the DVD. [laughs]

Jamie: People have it on DVD.

Micah: I actually watched it last night.

Andrew: Really?

Micah: I did.

Andrew: Well, you’re a dork.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: People, some people, I just don’t see, like…

Ben: What about people who can’t afford the DVD?

[Ben and Micah laugh]

Andrew: What? It’s true.

Micah: Well, I tend to watch it more when it’s on HBO just because no commercials and things like that, but a lot of times ABC puts on deleted scenes, and I don’t have any of the DVDs with deleted scenes. So…

Andrew: Oh, okay.

Micah: I’ll watch for that more than anything else.

Andrew: It doesn’t seem like it’s worth posting on MuggleNet because all of the people on the site are hardcore fans, and chances are they watched it a few days prior to when it’s airing anyway.

Jamie: Yeah. Yeah.

Andrew: And, you know, and you look in the comments in the news post and people are like, “Ah, who cares?”

Jamie: Well, exactly. That’s the thing.

Andrew: I don’t know. We should look up the ratings and see what…

Micah: Yeah, that’s a good idea. Last night was a big deal because it was sponsored by Eragon.

Andrew: Oh, was there Eragon stuff? I’m sure Shurtugal.com is going all out.

Laura: I have a question, and I don’t want to make any of our friends over at Shurtugal angry, but who thinks that the Eragon poster is kind of a big rip-off of the Goblet of Fire one? [laughs]

Andrew: What is it?

Laura: Well, haven’t you seen it?

Andrew: I might have. I forget. Is it just a big “E”?

Laura: No. No, no, no. It’s all of them standing around, and it looks…

Andrew: Oh, yeah.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Andrew: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’ve seen that.

Laura: It looks exactly like the Goblet of Fire poster.

Andrew: Well, of course. They want all the Harry Potter dorks to come out and see it. It’s “the next great adventure film!” That’s not what they’re calling it, but I’m sure that’s what they’re trying to market it to be.


News Discussion: MuggleNet Book


Andrew: Other than that it was a pretty slow news week, but there was one news item that got posted on MuggleNet and nowhere else, Ben.

Ben: Oh! Which one?

Jamie: Yeah, it’s a book. Have you heard of it? We wrote it a few months ago.

Ben: Oh, yeah. [laughs] That one.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Go out and buy it. MuggleNet.com’s What will happen in Harry Potter 7: Who lives? Who dies? Who falls in love? And how the adventure finally ends. The book is written by myself, Jamie, Emerson, Gretchen, and Andy, so go check it out. I mean, you can preorder it from Alivan’s. The book won’t actually be on shelves in your local Barnes and Noble and/or Borders store until late November or early December, so you can pick up a copy now.

Andrew: Is there some sort of money back guarantee I can get if you guys are way off on your predictions?

Ben: Uhhh…

Jamie: We will, uhhh…

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: Yeah. Just yeah.

Andrew: Yeah? Okay. [laughs]

Ben: But also, something else…

Laura: You might need it. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah. [laughs]


Order Countdown, Visit MuggleShop, Check out Halloween Layout


Ben: Check out MuggleNet now. Speaking of “Order of the Phoenix,” we added Order of the Phoenix countdown.

Andrew: Wooo!

Jamie: Wee.

Ben: So, go ahead and download that.

Andrew: I’m pumped.

Jamie: And MuggleShop.

Ben: We also have a Halloween layout. And, with the holiday season approaching, you can use MuggleNet.com’s new Harry Potter store called MuggleShop. It has every Harry Potter item. For each purchase you make, we earn a commission. It goes towards supporting the podcast, the site, everything, so go purchase your Harry Potter related Christmas items there.


MuggleCast T-Shirt Update


Andrew: Speaking of purchasing, if you do want to help support MuggleCast, you can also purchase a MuggleCast t-shirt. We’ve also learned, guys, that we will only be able to sell the MuggleCast t-shirts until January 1st.

Ben: So now is the time to buy.

Andrew: If you’re thinking about it, yeah, now is the time to buy. And we’re not kidding. We have to be finished selling them.

Ben: Sales will be discontinued!

Jamie: Yeah, we aren’t kidding.

Andrew: Also, don’t forget to vote for us on Podcast Alley. We appreciate everyone’s vote over there to keep everyone in the podcast community reminded that we PWN! [Pronounces it ‘pawn’] at life.


Tangent: PWN!


Ben: [Mocking Andrew] PWN? [pronounces it ‘pawn’]

Andrew: And at podcasting. Yes, we PWN. [Pronounces it ‘pawn’] P-w-n?

Laura: That’s not how you say it.

Andrew: Do you not speak Leet?

Ben: It’s PWN, [Pronounces it ‘pone’]

Laura: It’s PWN. [Pronounces it ‘pone’]

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: No, we here in New Jersey say “PWN.” [Pronounces it ‘pawn’]

Ben: It’s PQN. [Pronounces it ‘pone’]

Jamie: No, no, no, you mean just you, Andrew?

Laura: A pawn is a chess piece, Andrew.

Andrew: No crap!

Jamie: We ‘queen and castle’ at everything.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: No, seriously, you just made another flub, now you’re embarrassed again.

Andrew: No, no, I’m serious. We… No, everyone says “PWN.” [Pronounces it ‘pawn’]

Ben: No they don’t, you’re lying.

Andrew. PWN. [pronounces it ‘pone’] Dork. Whatever.

Ben: I’ve been there. Nobody pronounces it ‘pawn.’


Prophecy 2007


Andrew: Moving on. As we announced last week, we will probably be at Prophecy. We can’t officially announce anything yet. They’ve asked us to not start going at it just yet. But we’ve been getting a lot of emails about it asking if we’re going to be there, and it looks like we will go. Maybe not a live podcast, but we will be there.

Jamie: Aren’t we doing a podcast?

Andrew: Probably. I’m not sure yet. But we can’t guarantee anything yet.


Listener Rebuttal – MuggleCast T-Shirt Update


Andrew: We have a rebuttal for everyone now, and then we’ll get into some fun Halloween discussion on ghosts this week, created by Micah. This rebuttal comes from Miranda of Idaho.

“I wholeheartedly agree with Laura that the Department of Mysteries will play a big role in Book Seven. As a matter of fact [laughs] I think the Department of Mysteries and the Love Room will play a huge role as the setting of the final battle between Harry and Voldemort, with Harry utilizing the power within the room to overcome Voldemort. Even though Harry wasn’t able to open the door in Order of the Phoenix, he has to be one of the few people than could actually enter the Love Room, full of what Dumbledore described as the ‘most beautiful and terrifying power’ because of his mother’s love and his ability to love. It makes sense for the one thing that saved Harry in the first place, love, to once again save him, and it being the first thing that brought Voldemort’s downfall also be his final demise. Truly, the only thing that Voldemort doesn’t understand, obviously, is the ancient magic of love, and since Lily’s unprecedented love for Harry was only enough to save her child and rip Voldemort from his body, it will take even stronger love, such as that in the room, in order to actually kill him. Love the show, and Ben, you’re my favorite.”

Ben: Awww.

Andrew: Clearly this girl is nuts.

[Ben, Micah, and Laura laugh]

Andrew: [laughs]Shut up. Good point brought up by Miranda of Idaho. Very nice.

Laura: Thank you, Miranda.

Micah: I don’t know if I agree with the final battle taking place there, though.

Laura: Well, I don’t if that’ll happen, but…

Andrew: I do think that’s a bit of a stretch.

Laura: But, nut, I think that Harry’s going to be there, for some reason.

Andrew: Mhm.

Micah: You think he’s going to study there, don’t you? That’s your big thing, Laura.

Laura: Yes! I don’t think he’s going to go and like, open up a notebook [laughs] and start taking notes, but…

Micah: But he’s going to go there at some point.

Laura: He’s going to go there, yeah. Of course, he has to.


Where Will Final Battle Take Place?


Andrew: Where do you guys think the final battle will take place?

Ben: Hogwarts.

Laura: Not at Hogwarts! Not at Hogwarts. Oh my god.

Andrew: I think it should.

Laura: No!

Ben: Why not, Laura? Why not?

Laura: Every bad fan fiction I’ve ever read in my whole life, they have the final battle take place at Hogwarts, and then…

Micah: No, no, nit

Laura: First years are out fighting Death Eaters. It’s ridiculous. No.

Micah: I think it should be at Godric’s Hollow.

Andrew: Yeah, oh, that would be good. Yeah.


Azkaban in Order of the Phoenix


Andrew: You guys want a cool Azkaban fact?

Laura: Sure.

Andrew: In the movie Order of Phoenix, it’s on a waterfall cliff. Did we say that at the live podcast?

Ben: No.

Micah: No.

Laura: It is, is it?

Andrew: It’s on a waterfall cliff in the shape of a “V.” No, an “A,” but it looks like a “V.” It’s really cool.


MuggleCasters’ Past Halloween Experiences


Andrew: So, since it is our Halloween show, we’re going have a little talk about Halloween in the past. Right, Jamie?

Jamie: Yeah, we are. We’re going to talk about what we did for Halloween as children or what we do now if we still like trick-or-treating and enjoy it. Let’s do it. Andrew, what did you do?

Andrew: Does anyone still trick-or-treat right now?

Laura: No.

Andrew: Okay.

Micah: I do.

Ben: Micah does.

Andrew: [laughs] Micah. I was just wondering.

Laura: My mom won’t let me.

Andrew: [Laughs and imitates Laura] I can’t be out past eight.

Ben: Out of curiosity, when did you guys stop trick-or-treating? For me it was sixth – fifth grade.

Andrew: Oh, geez. I stopped two or three – no. When was it? Eighth grade, I think I stopped.

Laura: I don’t…

Andrew: I don’t know, I just woke up one morning and was like, “I’m not going trick-or-treating this year. It’s lame.”

[Ben laughs]

Laura: I don’t – I think it was probably eighth grade.

Jamie: How do you guys remember?

Laura: [laughs] It’s kind of sad.

Andrew: Well, we know Micah’s answer.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: Jamie, do you still trick-or-treat? Do they even have Halloween over there?

Jamie: No yes they do, but I have a confession to make. I haven’t ever trick-or-treated, ever, in my life. Nor have I dressed up for Halloween.

Andrew: What?

Jamie: I just I’ve just never ever seen the attraction, to be honest, of going out.

Andrew: Even when you were in third grade, you were like, “This isn’t cool?”

Jamie: Oh, yeah, yeah. I was only interested in, sort of, nuclear physics and maths back then. I didn’t…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: No, seriously. You never dressed up?

Jamie: No, yeah, I just didn’t see the attraction of it. I just thought, you know, in the freezing cold going out and asking for candy, and most people are mean and they don’t give you good candy, they just give you something.

Andrew: How do you know if you’ve never done it? [laughs]

Jamie: Well, yeah, because I have a very pessimistic view of the world, Andrew. Everybody’s mean.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: Everyone only cares about themselves. That stuff.

Laura: Do you guys know that they don’t really have Halloween in Australia?

Ben: Hmm.

Andrew: Really?

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: That’s interesting to know.

Jamie: So, yeah. Yeah, just never done it. Maybe I should. Maybe I’ll find it the most thrilling thing in the world, ever. Perhaps.


Micah’s Goofiest Costume


Andrew: I mean, I know I used to. What was the goofiest Halloween costume anyone has dressed up as? How about you, Micah?

Micah: Goofiest was probably in college, dressing up as a Royal Tenenbaums.

Andrew: Oooh, do you have a picture of that?

Micah: I do, actually.

Jamie: Yeah!

Andrew: Any chance we could use it as our album art for this week’s show?

Jamie: For this week?

Micah: Sure.

Jamie: So you can appear on millions of iPods around the world.

Micah: You want to see me dressed up as Gene Hackman.

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Oh, yeah, that’s my biggest fantasy. I dream that every night.

[Everyone laughs]

Micah: A white-haired old man.


Andrew’s Goofiest Costume – M&M or Eminem?


Andrew: I would have to say, I was an M&M one year, and that was kind of weird.

Ben: Okay, you were Eminem or an M&M?

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: An M&M, I said.

Jamie: Oh, I thought you said…

Ben: Oh, I thought you said you were Eminem one year.

Andrew: No! [laughs] I said an M&M.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: That’s why I asked you if you carried a chainsaw around with you.

Andrew: No!

Jamie: Because he carries a chainsaw. I didn’t realize – oh my god, that must have sounded so weird.

Ben: I thought you were a rapper.

Andrew: No, I wasn’t the rapper! Why would I be Eminem the rapper?

[Laura Laughs}

Ben: Because [laughs] that’s an actual Halloween costume!

Jamie: Andrew…

Andrew: It is? I’ve never seen someone dress up as Eminem. [laughs]

Jamie: What did you think I meant when I…

Andrew: Eminem isn’t a costume.

Ben: How old were you when you were an M&M?

Andrew: Third grade. [laughs]

Ben: Oh, I was going to say. If you were any older than that, that would be funny.

Jamie: How old is third grade?

Micah: You realize the avatars now, right? Are going to be Andrew’s head on an M&M.

Laura: [laughs] Yeah.

Andrew: Whatever. If someone does that I’ll just put the picture up of me dressed up as an M&M. I don’t care.

Jamie: How old is third grade?

Andrew: Seven or eight.

Jamie: Andrew, what do you think I meant when I said, “Did you bring a chainsaw with you?”

[Laura and Micah laugh]

Andrew: I thought you were joking because it would be a candy M&M and a chainsaw, so it would be kind of funny.

Jamie: Oh my god!

Laura: Yeah, I honestly didn’t get it either yesterday. I was like, what is he talking about?

Jamie: I thought you meant Eminem.

Andrew: Eminem does not carry around a chainsaw!

Jamie: Eminem does though. Eminem.

Andrew: No, he doesn’t!

Jamie: Yes, he does. There’s a picture of him with like, a mask on holding a chainsaw.

Andrew: A picture.

Jamie: Yeah. That means he has done it. Hence, he has done it before. Therefore…

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Andrew: All right. I guess so.


Jamie’s Negative View of Halloween


Micah: Jamie, do you still plan to steal candy?

Jamie: Yes, I’m not going to be nice to anyone. I think my pessimistic view of the world is true, that everyone’s mean. I’m not going to completely disappoint myself. I’m going to be mean as well.

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: I’m going to steal everything. I’m going to dropkick pumpkins. I’m going to – I’m going to take off costumes and throw them in the garbage can.


Main Discussion: Ghosts at Hogwarts


Andrew: So, continuing with our cute little Halloween theme here, we’re going to ghosts at Hogwarts because there are quite a few of them and we’ve never really talked about them much at all. We’ve talked about Peeves once or twice, we’ve probably had a little discussion about Nearly Headless Nick and Moaning Myrtle, but never really had a full discussion on all the ghosts. Isn’t that right, Micah?


House Ghosts


Micah: That is right, Andrew. Ghosts at Hogwarts. You know, each House has a ghost, so what characteristics do you guys think that a House ghost has that links them to a particular House?

Laura: I think it was…

Micah: Based on what we’ve seen.

Laura: …the house they were in when they went to school.

Andrew: Is that always the house that they were…

Jamie: I think it probably is.

Andrew: …that they represent?

Laura: Well, why would… Okay, if Nearly Headless Nick were a Ravenclaw, why would he be the Gryffindor ghost?

Andrew: What I, I… Yeah.

Laura: That makes no sense.

Jamie: That is very true. [laughs] So, yeah.

Laura: I think The Bloody Baron was a Hufflepuff, in that case.

Jamie: Yeah. Yeah.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Andrew: No, so Nearly Headless Nick was a…

Ben: Obviously.

Andrew: …brave young lad.

Micah: Yep.

Andrew: That’s – that could explain why he is nearly headless, folks.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: And the Fat Friar was…

Andrew: Maybe Harry’s going the same way.


Becoming a House Ghost


Micah: How do they become House ghosts? Is there a selection process?

Jamie: Yeah, you apply.

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: Fill in a form and send it off, and then…

Ben: No, see, I hate these…

Laura: No, I don’t think so.

Ben: …questions that you can’t even answer.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: I mean, there’s like [laughs] it’s all just conjecture, there’s nothing to back it up.

Jamie: The entire show’s conjecture. Jo’s going to answer it in Book Seven, so we should…

Andrew: How do you know?

Jamie: Because she said she will.

Ben: Did she?

Andrew: Oh.

Jamie: Yeah, she did. She said, “There will be more information on why people become ghosts, and why they choose that path.” Because as Nearly Headless Nick says in Book Five…

Ben: But not why they become House ghosts.

Jamie: No, but ghosts in general.

Ben: That’s different.

Jamie: Ghosts in general.

Ben: Oh.

Andrew: Maybe they become house ghosts because they do some sort of service to the school…

Jamie: Yes, that could be it.

Andrew: …that the headmaster wanted to recognize.

Laura: Maybe because they chose to stay at the school. [laughs]

Andrew: Well, right, but if…

Laura: So, if they’re going to stay at the school, then…

Andrew: No, but if I want to turn into a ghost… If I want to be a ghost and I want to stay at the school, that automatically makes me a House ghost? We’re talking about the House ghosts here, just the one. [clears throat]

Laura: Okay, well if they have to do some kind of special service, I doubt The Bloody Baron is exactly considered a…

Ben: No.

Andrew: You don’t, you don’t know that.

Laura: …genuinely nice guy. [laughs]

Ben: Tom Riddle. Tom Riddle did a special service to the school.

Jamie: Yeah, but it’s not everyone who does a special service. It’s just..> Do you think… See, I was planning on saying, “Do you think, when the House ghost dies, he gets replaced by another one?” But can they retire or not?

[Ben, Micah and Laura laugh]

Jamie: Can they say, “Well, screw this. I don’t want to do this anymore,” and then go, or are they tied down…

Laura: No, they…

Jamie: …by a contract?

Laura: I don’t think they can.

Andrew: Well, what else, what else, Laura, do you think could possibly…

Laura: Could possibly what?

Andrew: You know, what lets them become a House ghost? There’s only one per House. That was…

Laura: Well…

Andrew: …the point.

Laura: I just…

Andrew: And then they – they’re probably there forever.

Laura: Yeah, but…

Andrew: I would think.

Laura: …I don’t think they’re specified as “the House ghost.” I think that’s just how they’re known to the students. There’s probably more than one ghost per House.

Jamie: I doubt… There are loads of ghosts…

Laura: It’s just the ones we see.

Jamie: Yeah, but, but that’s – actually, that’s a point, Andrew, you know.


Dumbledore’s Control Over Ghosts


Laura: It’s not like – it’s not like Dumbledore runs around saying, “They’re your ghost prefects,” or whatever, they’re just ghosts that happen to live in the houses.

Andrew: I guess so.

Jamie: Yeah, yeah. It’s like, there have got to be more than five, six ghosts in the entire school that just float.

Andrew: But even so, wanting to stay at Hogwarts, that has to be…

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: …a decision that’s up to the headmaster. I mean, I would think you would really had to have been a great student…

Micah: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: …at the school, in order, you know, for Dumbledore or whoever to say, “You can stay in my school.”

Laura: Is it up to Dumbledore, though? Do you really think he has that much control over…

Andrew: Well…

Laura: …the school?

Andrew: …the current, current headmaster?

Laura: Peeves is in the school, and it doesn’t seem like it’s too easy to get rid of him.

Jamie: No, no.

Ben: Well, that’s because Dumbledore wants him around.

Jamie: Exactly. There’s a reason.

Laura: No, I think…

Ben: No, no, no. Dumbledore won’t oust him. They’ve said that before.

Jamie: Of course, that’s true, yeah.

Laura: I know, but I mean, I don’t think that Dumbledore can say – tell a ghost to get out of his school.

Jamie: Of course he can! He’s so powerful, it’s ridiculous.

Ben: Yes, he could.

Laura: Well, he…

Andrew: He could.

Laura: He can say it, but he can’t make it happen.

Jamie: Of course he can! He can… Laura, he can do anything. He can do absolutely anything.

Laura: I’m not saying I know it for sure. I’m saying, yeah, he can do absolutely everything except stop himself from getting killed.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Ben: Ohhh!

Jamie: But he wanted to die, so it’s fine.


Nearly Headless Nick


Micah: Looking at some of the House ghosts, specifically, Nearly Headless Nick, Gryffindor, he died on Halloween, October 31, 1492, and this is something interesting I found out and I didn’t know this, but his day that he died is actually the basis for the entire timeline in the Harry Potter series. Did you guys know that?

Ben: What do you mean?

Jamie: He means that 19 – 1492 is, is when he died, okay? And in – and he celebrates his 500th death, death day in Chamber of Secrets at Halloween, which means that Chamber of Secrets takes place in 1992. Which also means that Philosopher’s Stone

Andrew: Oooh.

Jamie: …took place in 1991, and Harry’s parents were attacked by Voldemort in 1981, and that forms the basis for the entire timeline of the films. Sorry, of the books.

Ben: Hey, I’m not a big fan of…

Andrew: I see.

Ben: …doing that.

Andrew: The timeline thing?

Ben: Yeah, if it makes any sense.

Andrew: Yeah. Some people put a lot of speculation on, like, the timelines. Like there’s a lot of – there’s that one theory about the missing day in between when Harry’s parents were killed and when Dumbledore took Harry to the Dursley’s.

Laura: Well, timeline, timeline or not, I – that day was missing. I mean, if you think about it, the Potters were killed Halloween night, and Harry didn’t show up at the Dursley’s until the next night.

Andrew: I mean, that could just be that he had him at Hogwarts for a day to figure out what the heck they were going to do with Harry.

Laura: But, but Dumbledore didn’t take Harry, Hagrid did.

Andrew: I don’t think they have to make a big deal out of it. All right, so Hagrid took him back to the school, and then Dumbledore, you know, tried to figure out what to do. I mean, that’s a big decision; where you’re going to leave that kid, and…

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: …didn’t Dumbledore say that he was trying to get in contact with relatives, and that’s the only one he could find?

Laura: I don’t think so. I think that they knew that those were his only living relatives, but…

Andrew: Yeah, well, I mean…

Laura: And it’s not like he exactly warned them before he left Harry on their doorstep. [laughs]

Andrew: Right, yeah. I mean, so that’s a big decision. I think people need to stop going crazy over that. [in a mock worried voice] “Oh, what’s happening in the one day? It’s all wrong.” It just doesn’t…

Laura: I don’t think it’s wrong.

Andrew: There’s plenty of explanation.

Laura: I think that if there’s an extra day in there for a reason, it’s not anything she did wrong. [laughs]

Andrew: Well…

Laura: It’s something else that…

Andrew: Well, that’s what I mean. I mean, people are like, “Explain it.” But there’s no explanation.

Laura: Yeah. I don’t think it’s a screw up, essentially.

Andrew: I don’t think so either.


Nick and Harry Discuss Sirius


Micah: Well, Halloween does seem to play a big role in the series in all the different books, for the most part. Do we want to talk a little bit about some of the other events that have occurred?

Jamie: Why don’t we…why don’t we just…

Andrew: Sure.

Laura: Sure.

Jamie: …finish talking about Nearly Headless Nick.

Andrew: Nearly Headless… Yeah.

Jamie: …and talking about when Harry went to speak to him at the end of Order of the Phoenix. What do we think of that, if we can remember? He went to ask him if Sirius could come back, and, well, one of the things that happened was he asked him if Sirius could come back and he said, “He will not choose that path,” and Harry said, “Why? Of course he will. He wants to see me again. Of course he will,” and then he said, “No, he won’t,” which makes me think that perhaps there’s a huge price to pay when you choose to become a ghost. If it means you can come back, there’s got to be something else you can’t do. You know? Like, love or something like that, maybe, and that’s why Sirius…

Ben: Eat. [laughs]

Jamie: …won’t come back. [laughs] Yeah, eat, that’s the big thing.

[Andrew, Ben, and Micah laugh]

Jamie: So, yeah.

Andrew: Maybe he just, maybe he just wouldn’t want to see Harry…

Jamie: Through the eyes of a ghost?

Andrew: Yeah, like, the relationship would never be the same, I don’t think.

Ben: Well, maybe…

Andrew: It’s not like…

Ben: Maybe it has something to do with like, once you become a ghost, you can never, like, you’re always going to exist, you know what I mean?

Laura: Well…

Ben: Like, that makes sense for that to be a sacrifice.

Laura: Well, that’s pretty much what Nick said. He said that it was just kind of a pale existence, that it was basically mimicking the existence they once had. They just sort of got to watch from the sidelines.

Jamie: Yeah.

Laura: If you get what I’m saying?

Jamie: Yeah. No, yeah, I think that’s true.

Micah: Also, you limit – and let’s not react in a bad way to this – you limit the physical interaction there can be, and I don’t think that Sirius…

Laura: Well, yeah…

Ben: Can ghosts interact with other ghosts?

Jamie: Yeah, yeah. They…Peeves…

Laura: [laughs] They do all the time.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: No, I mean like physically.

Jamie: Yep.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: In their own physical sense.

Andrew: Like shake hands?

Ben: Yeah, or can they touch each other? Not in a bad way.

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: But like, you know what I’m talking about how like Nearly Headless Nick – this may be a movie thing – but his head falls off and then he reaches up and he pulls it back.

Laura: Well, of course he can…

Andrew: Well, he’s got to be able to…

Laura: …you can touch yourself.

Andrew: Well, I guess if you can touch yourself and you’re a ghost…

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: …then you can probably touch other ghosts.


The Bloody Baron


Micah: All right, the Bloody Baron. How do you guys think the Bloody Baron died?

Jamie: [laughs] He got hacked to pieces, considering all the blood on him.

Laura: Yeah. [laughs] That’s what I was going to say.

Jamie: Or he slipped over a blood factory and banged his head on the ground and died and then that’s why all the…

[Everyone laughs]

Micah: Well, whose or what’s blood do you guys think is on him? It’s described as being “silvery.” Do you think it belongs to unicorns?

Jamie: Yeah but he…unicorns…

Laura: I think it’s silvery just because he’s a ghost.

Jamie: Yeah.

Laura: I mean, they’re white and transparent, I think the blood is just silvery because of the composition of a ghost’s body.

Micah: All right, Laura, so how can he keep Peeves under control?

Jamie: Because he’s scary as *bleep*.

Laura: Yeah, obviously there’s something about him that scares Peeves.

Micah: Just like Dumbledore.

Laura: Yeah.

Micah: Meaning Dumbledore can also keep… Well, then what do you think it is about him that scares him?

Andrew: Yeah, what can the Bloody Baron do to Peeves?

Jamie: No, he can, I mean, if it goes back to what we were talking about how ghosts can touch, then clearly, it could be something physical he can do to Peeves.


The Fat Friar


Micah: So, the Fat Friar. How do you guys think he died?

Jamie: He doesn’t seem particularly interesting, the Fat Friar, does he? He just…

Andrew: No.

Laura: No.

Jamie: He, yeah, but as it says here. Sorry, I mean, what I mean is, I have a point. He tries to get Peeves invited to the opening feast in Sorcerer’s Stone and so he seems to be extremely forgiving and he doesn’t care. He’s just happy-go-lucky. Why is he like that? Do you think it represents the house?

Laura: Well, he’s a Hufflepuff.

Jamie: Well, yeah.

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: What? So, [laughs] yeah.

Andrew: Yeah, it sounds like he represents the house.

Ben: Maybe he was too trusting in his life and that’s why he got killed.

Jamie: In his previous life. A bit like Dumbledore.

Andrew: Oh, yeah. Good speculation, Ben.

Micah: So you’re saying Dumbledore’s a Hufflepuff?

Andrew: No. [laughs]


The Grey Lady


Micah: All right, the final house ghost, the Grey Lady from Ravenclaw. We really don’t know a whole lot about her. We don’t really see her that much in the books, but Jamie maybe you know something about this, there are various Grey Lady ghost stories that exist in London. Is that true?

Jamie: Ummm, I have heard a few, yeah. Lady Jane Grey was the great-granddaughter of Henry VII and she reigned as Queen, but she was actually uncrowned and she only reigned for nine days, which, you know, is absolutely nothing. And then I think she was beheaded at the Tower of London. So, yeah, that’s why her ghost is reported to haunt it. But, she’s supposed to haunt other castles as well in different places – haunted places. So, I mean, is there anything there? Like, maybe the Grey Lady was only at Hogwarts for nine days and then she got killed?

Andrew: Yeah, I was going to say maybe… Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: A bit unlike…

Andrew: Maybe Dumbledore felt bad for her, so he was like, “Come be a house ghost.”

Jamie: Yeah, yeah, well, don’t worry you can become a House ghost.

Ben: How about Professor Binns? How did he…

Andrew: Can we stay on top of Grey Lady for a second?

Jamie: Yeah, Ben, yeah, Ben.

Andrew: Not literally on top of her, I mean…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: We’d just fall through and hit the ground.

Micah: So, it’s possible that Jo took the name from there?

Jamie: Oh, I’m sure she did. Yeah.

Laura: Yeah, there’s really no doubt behind that.

Andrew: That would probably the most reasonable explanation for…

Jamie: Yeah, but she’s a very mysterious ghost. I think we hear once that she was floating by or something like that but we didn’t hear anything about her. Perhaps we’ll find something new in Book Seven?

Micah: I think she’s in Half-Blood Prince, if I remember. They said some ghost went by as Harry was talking to Hagrid about overhearing the conversation between Snape and Dumbledore.

Andrew: Oh.

Micah: She seems to be around at kind of interesting times because they said in the movie for Chamber of Secrets and I don’t know if this was in the books too. It was a scene that was cut out where – it’s the first time that Harry goes to open Tom Riddle’s diary.

Andrew: Yeah?

Micah: And he tells the Grey Lady to get lost.

Jamie: No, he doesn’t, does he?

Andrew: Oh?

Jamie: Really?

Andrew: It’s a deleted scene.

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: Oh, sorry. It’s a deleted scene, I see. Sorry.

Micah: But, I don’t know.

Andrew: Why would they cut that? What was in replace of it? Just without the Grey Lady going behind him?

Micah: Yeah, I think so.

Andrew: Do you think Jo could have any involvement in that or they just realized maybe it served no purpose?

Jamie: Oh, she could have had, yeah. If it’s like…

Laura: She could have, but, I mean, I think it was…

Andrew: How do we know it’s the Grey Lady?

Laura: Yeah, I mean, I just think it was another cut they were…


Peeves


Micah: So, going back to Peeves, why do you guys think he’s allowed to stay at Hogwarts? Why does Dumbledore let him?

Andrew: I think that’s just Dumbledore’s got a soft spot in his heart.

Laura: Yeah, I think Dumbledore is kind of amused by him, to be honest.

Ben: I think there’s some other reason. I don’t know what, but there’s some other reason.

Andrew: Why? Kicking him out would just be mean and that’s not like Dumbledore.

Micah: But, he’s also a poltergeist. He’s not an actual ghost.

Ben: What’s the difference?

Jamie: One’s mean.

Laura: Poltergeists were never alive.

Micah: Well, actually…

Jamie: Oh, is that true?

Laura: Yeah, poltergeists are pure energy, it’s what they are. I mean, poltergeists are actually considered to be real things. Not like the ones you see in the movies, but, especially like young teenagers, like 13 or 14-year old girls exhibit so much electrical energy that they can actually make stuff fall over when they’re really angry.

Jamie: Ahhh.

Laura: And that’s considered a poltergeist.

Ben: Let’s see…

Laura: So, it’s actually, it’s kind of a manifestation of a residence, I think.

Ben: Hold on. Hold on, noisy ghosts…

Micah: It says it’s a jerk. And a noisy ghost… Yeah.

Ben: Poltergeists are invisible masses of spirit or energy that may or may not be connected to a living human agent. Some of the most common poltergeist activities include loud, unexplained noise, levitation, the moving of objects, and electrical problems. It’s from Google.

Andrew: Okay, so there’s no stopping Peeves, so it’s not like Dumbledore can be mad at him for doing what he’s doing.

Jamie: No, I’m sure that Dumbledore could get him out if he wanted to, though. There’s no way he couldn’t find a way. Well, he couldn’t now, he’s dead.

Laura: I think Peeves probably came with Hogwarts, kind of like the way…

Jamie: Maybe it’s Slytherin.

Laura: …house elves come with houses.

Andrew: Hmmm.

Jamie: Could be.

Ben: I don’t know.

Jamie: No, I was just going to say, Laura can’t be right because Hogwarts predates Nearly Headless Nick, so the ghosts of the thing obviously came afterwards.

Laura: But poltergeists aren’t ghosts of people. [laughs] That’s the thing.

Jamie: Yeah, I know.

Ben: They can be though.

Jamie: But, Ben’s just…

Laura: No, no, no, no, no. The definition you read said that it can be connected to a person, meaning it can be caused by a person.

Jamie: But…

Laura: Not that it’s a person’s spirit.

Ben: Right. But it’s the same thing, it means “noisy ghost.”

Laura: No, it’s not.


Professor Binns


Micah: All right, wrapping up the ghost discussion – Professor Binns. He didn’t even notice that he was dead, he just got up from teaching one day and kept on teaching.

Jamie: He must have realized when he tried to sort of put a sausage roll in his mouth and it just fell down and hit the ground.

[Micah laughs]

Jamie: He must know he’s dead now. He’d have to be gormless, very gormless.

Micah: Maybe not.

Ben: So he just fell asleep by the fireplace? Isn’t that what happened?

Jamie: And died and then…

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: …got up, so he must have had unfinished business as well. But you know, is to impart knowledge of goblins into the minds of young, eager students.

Ben: What did he die from? Do you know?

Laura: Old age, I think. I don’t think it was terribly specific.

Jamie: No.

Andrew: He fell into it.

Jamie: Yeah [laughs]

Micah: And this question [laughs], it’s kind of far out there but he taught Tom Riddle. Do you think he can provide any useful information for Harry?

Laura: I think that was what Slughorn was for.

Micah: Yeah, I agree with that.

Jamie: Yeah, that’s true.

Micah: Well, what’s left?

Andrew: I mean, well, he could tell Harry about Tom Riddle. Is that…

Laura: I don’t think so though.

Andrew: …what the question was about?

Laura: Because, you see, he doesn’t pay that much attention to the students anyway.

Andrew: It doesn’t matter, I mean, well…

Laura: He keeps calling Harry “Mr. Perkins” or something…

Jamie: But Laura, he…

Laura: …he doesn’t even call him by his last name.

Jamie: Yeah, but he knows a lot about the Chamber of Secrets. So if he knows about that, he clearly know stuff about Hogwarts’ folklore legend and stuff, although of course, he said it didn’t exist which was incorrect; wrong.

Andrew: I mean. And plus, it was a really long time ago that he taught Tom, so he could possibly, I don’t know. You would know something about your students, like he’s got to know about Harry. After teaching him, he’s got to gather some information about him. Like maybe he knows a weakness or something.

Laura: I guess.

Andrew: I don’t know, you never know, there could be a whole back-story to it.

Laura: Maybe, I just think that the purpose that Slughorn served was to provide insight on Tom Riddle as a student at Hogwarts. I think that’s already been taken care of.

Jamie: Mhm, agreed.

Andrew: Yep, all right, that concludes our discussion on some ghosts at Hogwarts. Was it spooky?

[Laughs comically with Ben].


Listener Rebuttal – Ron and the Brains


Andrew: Before we get into our little Halloween debate, first, we have a rebuttal from Mark from Northern Ireland, age 29. He writes:

“With regards to the idea that Ron may have suffered lasting effects as a result of his attack by a brain. You should remember the quote by Dumbledore where Dumbledore does say:

‘Well, Harry’ said Dumbledore, finally turning away from the baby bird, ‘you will be pleased to hear that none of your fellow students are going to suffer lasting damage from the night’s events’.

Dumbledore made it clear to Harry that none of his friends, including Ron, will suffer no lasting damage, although J.K.R. briefly reminds us about lingering scars on Ron’s arm in Half-Blood Prince. In the chapter “Hermione’s Helping Hand,” there is a passage that reads:

‘You can still see the marks where that awful woman made you write with your own blood, but you stuck to your own story anyway.’

She says to Harry. And then Ron says:

‘You can still see where those brains got a hold on me in the Ministry of Magic, look,’ said Ron shaking back his sleeves.’

‘And it doesn’t hurt that you’ve grown about a foot over the summer either,’ Hermione finished.”

[laughs] Hermione, you’re so funny. So, what do you guys think? I mean, this is interesting because, on the one hand, Dumbledore is saying that there is no lasting damage, but what is he talking about? Physically or mentally?

Jamie: Exactly. I think that Dumbledore would think that, you know, physical damage is absolutely nothing. The complete opposite of what Voldemort would think, who would think that physical damage is terrible…

Micah: Right.

Laura: Mhm.

Jamie: You know. I think that Dumbledore would always consider there’s no lasting mental damage, but he might have a few scars, which is nothing to what Dumbledore would, you know.

Andrew: Right. That’s a good way to look at it.

Laura: I think that it can go either way honestly.


Debate: Halloween


Andrew: Yeah. Moving on to our debate now. Today’s debate topic is: Trick-or-Treating is a morally vapid delinquent activity that exploits the fear of human beings into giving material gifts. Jamie and I are affirming and Micah and Laura are denying, and Ben will make his decision at the end. Jamie, you got two minutes. Go!

Jamie: Okay, while Trick-or-Treating is extremely, you know, important to children and they think it’s quite a bit of fun, it really is very, very morally vapid. And, you know, it’s delinquent activity because people think that dressing up in costumes is fun, it’s scary, but they don’t realize the implications of what they’re doing. You just imagine, you’re 85-years old sitting at home and somebody knocks on your door.

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: You think, “It’s got to be a visitor,” because at that age, you’ve lived in a different generation, and you think that everyone, you know, is being nice. When you open the door, you don’t realize that it’s a joking child. You see a person with a knife and automatically, you think, you know, this could be very bad. It’s dangerous or bad things can happen. The only good thing that can come out of it is free candy, and things that are free aren’t really free. So…

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: …when a child takes that free bit of candy, he thinks it’s free, but really, it could cost a dear, dear old person their, you know…

Ben: Dignity.

Jamie: …enjoyment for that evening. Yeah, their dignity. It could’ve hurt them, you know, mentally to open the door and see somebody there. Also, getting things for free…

Ben: One minute, Andrew.

Jamie: Okay, go, Andrew.

Andrew: Not only that, you will be footing a bill for getting all those cavities taken out of your teeth.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Because you eat so much candy that night that you won’t have teeth. Not only that, I agree with Jamie; it is dangerous. My T.V. tech teacher told me a story once where his friend would put staples [laughs] into the candy and give it to kids

Jamie: Yeah. Loads of children have died.

Andrew: And these kids would eat it and then hurt themselves really bad because you’re chewing on staples. [laughs] No, wait, were they staples? Or were they nails? Oh, no, they were thumbtacks [laughs] inside the candy and it’s just terrible. It’s very dangerous. You never know what’s going into your candy.

Jamie: Yeah, also, also, things that are free aren’t automatically good. You shouldn’t get things free now-a-days. You should buy your candy. You should work hard, manual labor, buy your candy, that’s the way the world goes around. Go!

Ben: Okay, that concludes [laughs] the affirmative.

[Andrew giggles]

Laura and Micah…

Andrew: We won.

Ben: …tell me, tell me, why is Trick-or-Treating not morally vapid?

Laura: Well, I think first of all, if you want to say that it’s bad to get things for free, then you need to get rid of Christmas, not Halloween.

[Andrew laughs]

Laura: And like any other holiday, it’s just something for people to look forward to. It’s Jo’s favorite holiday; I don’t think she’d endorse something that was morally vapid. It’s a celebration passed down, which originally was honored the dead. Which, you know, isn’t a bad thing. And saying that Halloween causes delinquency is like saying…

[Andrew and Micah laughs]

Laura: …that Harry Potter creates Satanism. So, you’re wrong.

Ben: Mic-er?

Micah: I mean, Halloween brings about a sense of community too, you’re going around and you’re interacting with your neighbors…

Laura: Yeah.

Micah: You know? if you’re getting something free out of it, I don’t see how that’s wrong, and dressing up.

Laura: And see, I don’t know about you, Andrew, but my parents always checked my candy [laughs] to make sure no one put anything in it, maybe…

Micah: And honestly…

Laura: …maybe nobody did that for you.

Andrew: Is it open now?

Micah: That’s sort of…

Jamie: No, not yet.

Micah: …morally vapid on the sense on the person providing the candy, not the kids going out and Trick-or-Treating.

Laura: Exactly.

Jamie: Okay, okay, a community, you say, Laura you say that in… Sorry, Micah, you said that it encourages…

Micah: Yeah, because I sound like Laura.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: …a community. How does it encourage community? I’ve never, ever seen dressing up as scary figures encouraging, you know, friendship and stuff like that. Laura, you said…

Laura: Well, Jamie, you wouldn’t…

Jamie: You said… Laura, Laura, Laura…

Laura: …know. You’ve never gone Trick-or-Treating.

Jamie: …Laura, Laura, Trick-or-Treating…

Andrew: I second Jamie’s motion…

Jamie: …teaches people to interrupt…

Andrew: …as an experienced Trick-or-Treater.

Jamie: Yeah, there you go, see? And also, you said that the proper holiday was, you know, brought down from All Hallows Eve, celebrating the dead. I fail to see how going out, engaging in juvenile delinquent and immature activity…

Laura: Okay, people…

Jamie: …encourages a proper holiday.

Laura: Jamie, people are going to participate in delinquent activity whether there’s Halloween or not.

Jamie: No, it’s… They should be at home reading a book.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: They should be, I don’t know how it increases… It just teaches people that they can get things for free by scaring people.

Laura: So does Christmas and Easter and…

Jamie: Yes, it does.

Laura: …every other holiday.

Jamie: It’s all commercialized.

Andrew: It’s the season of giving.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: This is not the season of giving. We’re not there yet.

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: They should be…

Micah: Jamie, just because you got egged and toilet papered as a kid doesn’t mean that you have to hate Halloween.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: Okay.

Andrew: I’ve got one word for you all. In the words of Steve Irwin [does Steve impression] “Danger!” It’s dangerous, it’s very dangerous.

Jamie: All the bad things that can happen do not outweigh – sorry, do outweigh all the good things that could happen.

Andrew: You could hurt yourself.

Jamie: It’s just, there are so many things that could go wrong with it. The parents are letting children – and it’s normally children, of course, who go trick or treating. They are letting them out of their sight. In today’s world, you don’t know who is out there.

Micah: They walk around with them! What are you talking about!

Laura: [laughs] Yeah.

Jamie: They could knock on somebody’s door, a very dangerous door, and open it and they could be – there could be people there who…

Laura: Okay, that is not the responsibility of the holiday, that’s the responsibility of the parent.

Jamie: You’re absolutely… Laura, You’re absolutely right.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: They can go trick or treating and get taken in by a [pronounces it “pee-do-file”] pedophile…

[Micah laughs]

Jamie: And bad things can happen. But it’s fine because All Hollow’s Eve is celebration of the dead. Is it right to encourage it and increase it by [laughs] this? It’s just, it’s just dangerous, it’s a dangerous activity. Everyone will still have fun without it. Children – there are other ways to have fun than going out, on your own or with parents because some people do it on their own, and knocking on doors and getting free candy. It’s…

Micah: It’s one day out of the year, though!

Jamie: There are economic reasons, educational reasons, social reasons.

Laura: What are the economic reasons, Jamie?

[Ben, Andrew, Laura and Jamie laugh]

Laura: What are the economic reasons?

Jamie: The people should be taught the value of money, Laura.

Micah: I’m sure Hershey and Nestle and all those companies don’t have any problem with the economic reasons.

Jamie: You cannot get things free by scaring people. That is not what you should be taught when you are young.

[Ben laughs]

Laura: You don’t scare people! People open up the door and gush about how cute the little kids are in front of them.

[Ben and Andrew laugh]

Jamie: Yeah, because people dressed as Grim Reapers with blood pouring down them. Oh, lovely! I think they’re cute.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Okay, Andrew…

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Laura – Laura and Micah. You have one minute to tell me why you should win.

Laura: I think that… I mean, there’s no question. It’s a holiday that creates community. If you want to say get rid of Halloween, then you have to say get rid of Christmas, because there are tons of dangers that can come up with Christmas. I mean, come on, you’ve got a fat guy coming down your chimney. [laughs]

Micah: [laughs] If that’s not a pedophile, I don’t know what is.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Anything else?

Jamie: That is a good argument so far.

[Laura laughs]

Micah: And it’s a holiday. You’re not getting rid of it, you’re not going to change it no matter what happens.

Laura: Yeah, and like I said, you can’t say that Halloween causes people to run out and be delinquents. People are delinquents everyday. [laughs]

Jamie: Okay, can we go now, Ben?

Laura: It’s just an excuse.

Ben: Five seconds.

Jamie: It’s been about five minutes.

Ben: Two, one. Okay, Andrew and Jamie, why, why?

Jamie: Okay. Laura, you have changed this completely saying that we should get rid of the holiday. We shouldn’t get rid of the holiday, the holiday is a celebration of the dead. People should use Halloween to remember love ones past, not go around.

Andrew: Yeah!

Jamie: When you think of Halloween, you think of Trick-or Treating. You think of getting material gain. Material gain is a bad thing, okay.

Andrew: Yeah!

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: But we should be celebrating our –

Micah: So, you don’t want those Lucky Charms?

Laura: Okay, so…

Ben: No, no, no, no! You guys can’t interrupt! You guys can’t interrupt.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Yeah! [laughs]

Ben: Shut up, you can’t interrupt. They didn’t interrupt you, so shut up.

Jamie: It is important to remember the true meaning of holidays. Christmas: the birth of Jesus Christ; Halloween: remembering the dead. We shouldn’t commercialize things. Yes, we have commercialized all these holidays, we shouldn’t do it though. Halloween we should go back and go back to its roots. Remember the dead. Trick-or-Treating is dangerous – it can be very dangerous. It teaches people the wrong things. It encourages them to egg houses – that is not good in today’s world. You can’t go around doing that, but it teaches them that it’s fine because it’s a joke. But it’s not a joke. They then think it’s funny to do it. They do it at other times, it turns into bricks.

Andrew: Yeah.

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: They cause complete stuff – bad things to property. It is not a good idea.

Ben: Okay, okay. That’s it.

Andrew: Hey, let me… I have one last thing. It’s not Trick-or-Treat: it’s trick or DIE!

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: I agree.

Andrew: Thank you.

Ben: Something that was funny about that entire time was the only input Andrew added was [does impression of Andrew] “Yeah”.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Andrew: I know.

Jamie: That was an awesome ending, Andrew. I liked that.

Andrew: Thanks.

Ben: Okay, I’m going to have to vote with Andrew and Jamie.

[Andrew, Ben, and Jamie laugh]

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: And here’s why. Here’s why, it’s because…

Laura: Here is why: because Ben has a pattern of not voting for the team that Laura is on. I’ve noticed this.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Ben: No.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Not true, not true. I beat you. I debated against you and beat you once. Anyways – no. Here is why, here’s why. Laura and Micah were focusing on saying, “Well, the holiday is not going to be eliminated anyway and it creates community.” But when you look to what we were debating over is that: “Trick-or-Treating is a morally vapid delinquent activity that exploits the fear of human beings into giving material gifts,” and that is what Andrew and Jamie focused on. They focused on the fact that it’s promoting the…

Andrew: Yeah!

Jamie: Yeah!

[Laura laughs]

Ben: …what tangible gifts you get out of the holiday, rather than focusing on the true meaning of Halloween.

Andrew: Death.

Ben: You guys, Laura and Micah, brought up Christmas. “Well, what about Christmas; that encourages it too.” Jamie and Andrew weren’t saying that Christmas is okay, they were saying that it’s all bad. It’s all bad. You guys never actually denied the fact that it’s encouraging kids one night of the year to go out and egg peoples houses and toilet paper them. So, yep.

Laura: Actually, we did, Ben. [laughs]

Ben: Huh?

Laura: That was – our big thing was saying Halloween doesn’t cause delinquency.

Ben: Yes, it does though.

Laura: People are delinquents everyday.

Ben: No, they are. But that’s one night where it’s like everyone goes out and does it.

Jamie: It encourages it, though.

Ben: Yeah.

Laura: Okay.

Jamie: Yes they are everyday, but it still encourages them.

Laura: Okay, people do that at Christmas too. People do that on holidays.

Ben: No, they don’t!

Laura: Yes, they do!

Ben: Not nearly as much, not nearly as much.

Andrew: No, nobody causes trouble on Christmas. [laughs]

Ben: Yeah, who goes out and eggs houses on Christmas?

Laura: Oh, please!

Andrew: I’ve never heard of that to be honest with you.

Laura: People…

Jamie: Laura…

Laura: People use excuses…

Ben: She made it up.

[Jamie laughs]

Laura: No, I didn’t.

Jamie: But, Laura…

Andrew: Alright well, we’ll see what the listeners think.

Ben: Your vote.


Chicken Soup For The MuggleCast Soul


Andrew: Popular… How about we just let the… No. No, we’ll do the same debate rules. While we’re doing some outrageous discussion topics here, we have a Chicken Soup for everyone that is pretty funny and I thought we could read it this week. It comes from Paige, 18, of Massachusetts. She writes:

“The other day I was riding the bus to Harvard Square while listening to MuggleCast and at one of the stops about 97 high schoolers got on the already fairly full bus. Each time we went around a curve in the road or around a corner we were so weighed down that the bottom of the bus would scrape ominously on the road and we would tilt to one side. For the first couple minutes, I was terrified that I was going to die, then I realized that it would not have been so bad to die at that moment because I was listening to MuggleCast. [Andrew laughs] Needless to say I did not die, however thank you for alleviating my fear of dying.”

Wow!

Micah: That is *bleep*.

Jamie: Wow.

Andrew: You guys didn’t think that was funny? That was funny, I burst out laughing.

Micah: Ben is right, these people just make *bleep* up.

Ben: Yeah.

[Everyone laughs]


Listener Rebuttals – Accio Pronunciation


Andrew: We also have a rebuttal now from – I guess this is a lady named She Who Must Not Be Named, 18, of Absolutely Nowhere. She writes:

“Dear MuggleCast, I’ve been wondering how on Earth you are supposed to pronounce [pronounces it ‘ah-see-oh’] Accio. My friends have several theories on it, on how it’s pronounced, but I figured I’d have the excerpts…experts…”

Ben: [laughs] Excerpts.

Andrew: [laughs]

“…argue about it. So far I’ve heard it about three different ways, but I was wondering what you guys think. Is it Accio [pronounced ‘ak-see-oh’], Accio [pronounced ‘ah-key-oh’], or Accio [pronounced ‘ah-see-oh’]. I personally think it is Accio [pronounced ‘ak-see-oh’] because the word ‘accept’ also begins with ‘acc’ and is pronounced ‘ak-sept.’ However, no theories are safe from you, so I’ll let you handle that.”

I actually went on and used their cool pronunciation guide.

Jamie: Oh.

Ben: Is it [pronounced ‘haw-grid’] Hagrid too?

Jamie: [laughs] Yeah.

Ben: Can you say [pronounced ‘haw-grid’] Hagrid?

Jamie: [pronounced ‘a-las-tor’] Alastor.

Ben: [pronounced ‘ru-bay-us’] Rubeus. Rubeus.

[Micah and Laura laugh]

Andrew: I don’t know, but what do you guys think it is?

Laura: I think it’s [pronounced ‘ah-see-oh’] Accio.

Jamie: Hey Ben, shhh, you know who I mean [pronounced ‘vol-de-more’] Voldemort.

Laura: But in the movie they say [pronounced ‘ak-e-oh’] Accio.

Jamie: I say that. I say [pronounced ‘ak-e-oh’] Accio.

Andrew: Do they? The real, according to the…

Laura: Yeah, they say [pronounced ‘ak-e-oh’] Accio, I think it’s [pronounced ‘ah-see-oh’] Accio though.

Andrew: Yeah, it is.

Ben: I heard Jeff Guillaume from HPANA called it [pronounced ‘ach-e-oh’] Accio.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: I don’t think that’s right.

Andrew: I think that’s a little off.

Ben: Well, how did you say it, Andrew? How did you used to say it?

Andrew: [pronounced ‘ah-see-oh’] Accio.

Ben: [laughs] No, no.

Andrew: No, I probably used to say [pronounced ‘ak-e-oh’] Accio.

Ben: I say [pronounced ‘ah-see-oh’] Accio.

Andrew: [pronounced ‘ah-see-oh’] Accio.

Jamie: You can’t trust the Scholastic pronunciation guide, because that woman is so softly spoken. Isn’t she, Ben? It’s ridiculous.

Andrew: [laughs] I know.

Jamie: She can’t get more softly spoken.

Ben: [pronounced ‘ru-bay-us’] Rubeus.

Jamie: Yeah, no.

Ben: [pronounced ‘ru-bay-us’] Rubeus. [laughs]

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: And she says [pronounces it ‘kah-noots’] knuts as well, so anything she says is automatically wrong.

[Andrew, Micah, and Laura laugh]

Andrew: Geez!

Micah: I think you should do it from now on, Jamie.

Jamie: No way.

Micah: Apply for the job!


Micah’s Halloween Prediction


Andrew: Now, Micah…

Ben: Mic-er!

Andrew: …Halloween is coming up, and you did make a little promise a few weeks ago. And now today is Halloween, and we’re recording – so everyone knows – on Sunday. So, even if it’s true, we didn’t know, so don’t be like – if Micah was right, don’t be like, “Well, you didn’t release the show on the day it was announced, sp.” No, this is being recorded on Sunday. So…

Ben: This has been projected for weeks.

Andrew: Micah, you still – yeah. Are you still sticking with your prediction?

Micah: Yeah! I’m sticking with the prediction that on Tuesday, she will reveal the title of Book Seven.

Laura: And what if you’re wrong?

Andrew: Yeah. We need to make a little bet here.

Micah: We can make a bet. You guys…

Andrew: What do you think, Ben?

Micah: …have to come up with the alternative.

Andrew: What do you think, Ben?

Ben: Her bet? For his bet, I mean?

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: I think he should have to do the news like a chipmunk.

Andrew: Ooo! I like that!

Jamie: Yeah, that’s it, yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Micah: All right!

Andrew: That’s what we’ll do.

Jamie: [singing in a chipmunk voice] Watch out, cause here we come!

Andrew: Are you going to do it, Micah?

Micah: The full news or part of the news?

Andrew: The full news.

Jamie: [still singing] It’s been awhile, so we’re back in style. So, get set to have some fun!

Micah: Yeah! That’s fine.

Andrew: All right!

Micah: I’ll accept that.

Ben: Are you that confident it’s going to happen?

Jamie: Whoa.

Micah: Yeah! Yeah.

Jamie: Awesome.


Laura Mallory Update


Andrew: And now, we have – we have a Laura Mallory update for everyone, because you might remember that we tried calling her twice two weeks ago and the show before that. And a guy named Peter wrote in to us. He said he too tried to call her, and he had better results than we did. [laughs] And he writes:

“I decided to call up Laura Mallory, and she picked up. She said that the press has distorted a lot of her story and that she has read most of the books. I said stuff like Harry Potter shows good over evil, but she said you have to fight evil with evil.”

Jamie: Good argument, good argument.

Andrew: “She says heard…”

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: “She says she has heard of MuggleCast, but she doesn’t listen to it.”

Well, no kidding.

“She said she doesn’t have time to talk to you MuggleCasters, though.”

Ben: All right, let’s call her up.

Andrew: I’m sure she’s very busy doing a whole lot of banning right now.

Ben: Complaining.

Jamie: Complaining. Complaining and hating, yeah.

Andrew: Watching Desperate Housewives right now.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: That is – yeah.

Andrew: “She said she doesn’t answer her phone much either. Also…”

Jamie: Her phone is clearly an indication of evil as well. Aw, it’s terrible, you know? Satan lives in her phone.

Andrew: Also, she…”

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: I understand.

Andrew: “Also, she talked about kids doing witchcraft and how it’s real and stuff.”

Jamie: Trick or treat, trick or treat, trick or treat.

Andrew: “We talked for a little while and she talked about things she said – things she said on the show. I then said if she had time to talk at all these meetings, how come she doesn’t have time to talk to you guys? She then said that she had to go.”

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: Hey.

Andrew: “She was just avoiding my questions, though. She said it was a blessing that I was talking to her and maybe we will wake up to see the truth about witchcraft and Harry Potter.”

Oh snap.

“I was just going to say that she could not let her kids read it and not stop the whole state, but she had already hung up. Maybe you guys should try calling again and see what happens.”

And then he gave us the number that he used, and we did use that number.


Pickles on Gilmore Girls


Andrew: Moving on – who caught the latest episode of Gilmore Girls?

Jamie: Not me.

Andrew: No one?

Laura: Mmm.

Andrew: I’m the only one who watches?

Ben: Mmm?

Andrew: Oh, okay. Well…

Laura: You watch Gilmore Girls? [laughs]

Andrew: Yes, of course, Laura! No, I wasn’t really watching them. We got a lot of emails, though, today, because the latest episode of Gilmore Girls – which I’m sorry, is the stupidest show I’ve ever seen. I had to download it to get the sound clip.

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: On the latest episode, they had a huge pickle reference, because they kept referring to some sort of illegal substance as crack or…

[Andrew, Micah, and Laura laugh]

Andrew: …as pickles. So, they do a code name. So and they…

Ben: They borrowed it from us.

Andrew: It went something like this:

[Plays audio clip]

Lorelai: Hey, Rory.

Rory: Hey, what’s going on?

Lorelai: Ah, well, Star’s Hollow smells like pickles.

Rory: Pickles?

Lorelai: Pickles?

Rory: Pickles, pickles?

Lorelai: Pickles.

Rory: Why?

Lorelai: Because the pickle train crashed?

Rory: Is this a joke? Is this a long, boring joke that I’m not going to get?

Lorelai: No, it’s no joke. The town smells like pickles because the pickle train was derailed.

Rory: A train full of pickles? Who knew there was such a thing?

Lorelai: Well, pickle train conductors, for one. It sounds so fun. I would have been the greatest pickle train conductor! Can you see me? “All aboard, you pickles!”

Rory: Mmm. Clearly you missed your calling.

Lorelai: Well, luckily there’s you. You’re young, you’re clever, you’re our great pickle-train conductor.

Rory: I can’t believe I’m missing this.

Lorelai: Well, you can celebrate next year on the anniversary. Now what’s going on with you?

[Audio clip ends]

Andrew: So there you go. You know, I hear that the producer of Gilmore Girls actually listens to MuggleCast, and that’s how…

Ben: Probably.

Jamie: I heard that, too.

Andrew: …they had the idea. Because – how many listeners are we up to now?

Jamie: Four million?

Andrew: 25 million?

Jamie: No, it’s a bit less. It’s twenty or something, but…

Andrew: Yeah. Yeah, maybe I’m exaggerating a little bit, but…

Jamie: Sweden dropped out. They banned it, so we went down five million.

[Andrew and Ben laugh]


British Jokes of the Day


Andrew: Yeah. And to wrap things up today, we have a British joke of the day.

Jamie: I have a couple of Halloween ones and then a normal one today.

Ben: Hold on, is this a British joke or just an English joke?

Jamie: Oh yeah, it could just be an English…

Andrew: I guess we should say it’s an English joke.

Jamie: No, no, no! Because I…

Andrew: Just joking.

Jamie: I think I’m talking for Scotland and Wales and Northern Ireland as well, so I think it’s a British joke.

Andrew: [laughs] Okay.

Jamie: Okay. First one: which building in New York does Dracula visit? The Vampire State Building.

[Ben, Jamie, and Laura laugh]

Andrew: Ooo. Figured it had something to do with Empire.

Jamie: [laughs] Okay.

[Andrew imitates Jamie’s laugh]

Jamie: Okay. Okay, one sec. Okay. Who was the most famous French skeleton?

Andrew: I don’t know.

Jamie: Napoleon Bone-aparte.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: Okay, this is good. This is good. What happens when the popular goats – sorry, ghost – gets lost in the fog? He is mist.

Andrew: What?

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: Oh.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: This is brilliant.

Andrew: Way to laugh, everyone. Way to add to it.

Jamie: Yeah, excellent.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: You were a ghost.

Jamie: How did the ghost go on holiday? This is terrible, I must admit. [laughs]

Andrew: I don’t know.

Jamie: By scare-plane.

Andrew: That’s just dumb!

Jamie: It is atrocious. Okay. Why don’t skeletons go to parties? Because they have no body to go with.

Andrew: Oh, ho, ho, ho.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: Okay, now away from the Halloween theme, this is a joke I made up. Okay?

Ben: No, you didn’t.

Andrew: Oh!

Jamie: I did! I swear I did! I swear I did.

Andrew: Ben stinks.

Jamie: Two kettles are arguing, okay?

Andrew: [laughs] What are you…

Jamie: [laughs] Okay?

Andrew: How did he come up with this?

Jamie: Two kettles are arguing. They keep swearing at each other and shouting. One of them – somebody says, “Why are we arguing?” The other one says, “Oh, we’re just letting off some steam.”

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, that wasn’t bad, actually! Those were pun-believable.

Jamie: Okay, so there we go.


Halloween Delinquency


Ben: So has your house ever been toilet papered or egged, Jamie? Is that why you’re so…

Jamie: No, but I’ve only lived here, in this house in Durham, for about four weeks.

Ben: No, but what about at home, though? Has your house…

Jamie: No, it hasn’t, actually. No, no, it hasn’t. Oh! We once got a plant pot thrown at the front door.

[Andrew, Laura, and Micah laugh]

Andrew: On Halloween, or just some random…

Jamie: No, it’s just normally, I think. Actually don’t think it had anything to do with Halloween.

[Andrew and Ben laugh]

Andrew: Oh geez.

Micah: Oh, so you’re saying there’s delinquent activities on days other than Halloween.

Jamie: Exactly. But Halloween encourages it, which is terrible, Micah!

Ben: Once…

Andrew: We’ll have to listen…

Ben: Once someone took a baseball bat to my mailbox.

[Andrew and Jamie laugh]

Ben: Like they completely…

Andrew: Really?

Ben: They seriously just completely knocked it off, right off the post.

Jamie: That’s not very nice.

[Laura laughs]


MuggleCast Mix-up


Andrew: We want to remind everyone that the MuggleCast Mix #1 was actually released on the feed earlier this week, and for that reason, we got a third of the regular downloads that we do on Episode 60, [laughs] because nobody got their latest show. So if you think – if anyone’s confused and didn’t get Episode 60, it is there. You just have to check your feed for older episodes other than the most recent one.


Show Close


Andrew: So, to contact us the P. O. Box, Ben, is located at?

Ben:

PO Box 223
Moundridge, Kansas, 67107.

Jamie: But don’t send anything valuable in case his mailbox gets a baseball batted [laughs] in it again.

Ben: Yeah. Again.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew [Show Close with music in background]: We are going to get back to voicemails probably next week, if you have a voicemail question that you want to – that you want us to answer on the show. Remember to keep it under thirty seconds and try to eliminate as much background noise as possible, then call, in the United States, 1-218-20-MAGIC. If you’re in the United Kingdom you can dial 020-8144-0677. If you’re in Australia you can call 02-8003-5668. You can also Skype the username MuggleCast. And you can also email us using mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com or just use the handy feedback form right there at mugglecast dot com. Once again, I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Andrew: We’ll see you next week for Episode 62 of MuggleCast. Oh, and email us and let us know what you thought of the opening of the show. Let us know if you liked it, or not. And peace, out.

Jamie: And be cool on Halloween.

Andrew: And remember be safe.

Jamie: Don’t go Trick-or-Treating.

Andrew: Check your candy, kids.

Ben: Don’t be – don’t be morally vapid.


Bloopers


Jamie: I just don’t think about it.

Laura: No, if the story development is good…

Jamie: What, you mean like…

Laura: Then the movie is probably going to be good.

Jamie: Laura, do you mean like if say movie one, Harry’s 10 and if in movie three he’s 85, the character development wouldn’t be…

Laura: No, no, no,

Jamie: Wouldn’t be true to life.

Laura: I’m saying, for instance…

Jamie: He’s got a beard.

[Andrew laughs]

[Laura sighs]

Jamie: I’d love to have a beard, I would. No actually I wouldn’t.

Laura: Well then, grow one.

Andrew: He can’t.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: Laura, are you joking?

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: I could not shave for a year-and-a-half and look like a baby.

[Laura and Andrew laughing]

Jamie: Actually, that is untrue. That is untrue.

Ben: Well not really.

Jamie: I’m just starting to get stubble on my neck now, that is a serious step.

Andrew: Oh my god.

Jamie: It’s like, it’s like…

Andrew: [laughing] You’re 19 and you’re just starting to get that.

Laura: That’s pretty normal.

Jamie: It’s like-

Andrew: No, it’s not.

Laura: Yeah, it is.

Jamie: Yes, it is.

Andrew: How would you know, Laura?

[Micah laughs]

Laura: Because it’s…

Jamie: Laura, Laura, Laura…

Andrew: Do you have stubble on your neck yet?

Jamie: Laura, when did you first start shaving?

Laura: Okay…

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: No, most… Okay, most guys…

Jamie: Can you wax your face, Laura? Instead of shaving?

Laura: I don’t need to wax my face.

Jamie: I don’t mean you. I don’t mean you, I mean men. Instead of shaving can you wax your face or not?

Laura: Yeah, you can get your face waxed.

Andrew: Ryan Seacrest does.

Jamie: No, I mean can you buy like strips…

Ben: No, it’s not, Laura

Jamie: …and then just put them on your face and rip them off? Can you do that?

Laura: Yeah, yeah you can.

Jamie: Really?

Laura: Yes [laughing].

Jamie: Well there you go it’s sorted then…


Andrew: [sings] You think you’ve got the stuff, telling me and anyone, it’s hard enough…”

Laura: [laughs] Andrew?

Andrew: [sings] “You don’t have to put up a fight.” [speaks] What?

Laura: Guess how many times I’ve listened to the “Saints Are Coming” on my iTunes?

Andrew: [sings] “Don’t have to always be right.” [speaks] Let me look at mine first.

Laura: [laughs] okay.

Andrew: [sings] “Take some of the punches for you tonight. Listen to me now.” [speaks] Hold on. [resumes signing] “Needed to let you know…”

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: 69 [laughs] for me. How many times for you?

Laura: 97.

Andrew: Oh my god! [sings] “And it’s still…”

[U2 plays in the background]

Laura: We should sing that song on here.

Andrew: And it’s you that ought to pick up the phone. Sometimes you can’t make it on your own.

Laura: I love the variation in your voice. How you go from like really bad opera singer to somewhat…

Andrew: Beautiful?

[Micah laughs]

Laura: [laughs] Yeah. Beautiful.

Andrew: [sings]
“All the time…”


[Micah laughs]

Andrew: Can we…

Jamie: I’m going to send children away empty handed.

Andrew: Can we make like a contest?

Laura: To see…

Jamie: What, who can be meanest?

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: No, no, no. I think it would be funny if you took a video of yourself drop-kicking a pumpkin and watching it explode.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: Would you also…

Andrew: It could be like a contest prize or something, [laughs] You get to see it or something.

Jamie: Would you…

Micah: But, would it be…

Andrew: So we film it so you can watch it and put it on YouTube.

Jamie: Would you also like a video of my being…

Ben: In a way…

Jamie: …carted of to the police station as well? Well Andrew for-

Andrew: Why because you broke your foot from drop-kicking a pumpkin?

Jamie: Yes, because when…

Laura: You get arrested in Britain…

Jamie: Because, because…

Laura: For breaking pumpkins?

Jamie: Because when… Yes, Andrew, because when you break your foot you get taken to the police station not the hospital.

Ben: Yeah [laughs]

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: I was going to say that.

Andrew: I meant hospital. No, seriously why would you get in trouble for drop-kicking a pumpkin?

Jamie: Because, it’s a breach of the peace. Okay, let me do a bit of history here okay?

Andrew: What?

Jamie: Let me do a bit of history okay?

Andrew: No, we don’t care for your British history.

Ben: No seriously, I want to hear this.

Andrew: It’s clearly flawed.

Jamie: It’s interesting – okay.

Andrew: Okay.

Jamie: There is – everything in England is to do with the Queen basically, okay. There is a thing called the Queen’s Peace, okay. The Queen’s Peace is being nice to everyone, there’s no war going on, there’s no trouble in the streets, okay. There is a crime – it isn’t actually on the record books as a crime, but it’s… There’s a thing called Breach of the Peace, which is a Breach of the Queen’s Peace. And you can be arrested for this thing, Breach of the Peace. So if you’re caught brawling in the streets, or if you’re caught throwing stuff or shouting at someone you’re in violation of a Breach of the Peace, so I can get arrested for that. Or, I can get arrested for harassment.

Andrew: Huh?

Jamie: All manner of things you can get arrested for.

Ben: For harassing a pumpkin?

Jamie: Yes, yes.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Harassment!

Jamie: They’re very, very sensitive pumpkins.

[Ben and Laura laugh]

Micah: But…

Laura: Would you get arrested for belting out “Proud to be an American” in the streets?

Jamie: No, no, I wouldn’t, but that’s a good idea. I’ll try it if you don’t hear from me in a few weeks, I probably….

Ben: Jamie, Jamie. Someone emailed in saying that you don’t know your own Britishness because, like you said there’s no such thing as a British accent it’s an English accent and that you should have corrected us long ago for saying British accent.

Jamie: Yeah it’s true, it’s true. Of course.

Andrew: Oh yeah, I saw that. What are you doing to us?

Laura: What? How is there no such thing as a British accent? What?

Andrew: Because apparently it’s an English accent is what they call it.

Jamie: It’s like calling it an American accent.

Jamie: It’s all dialects, you know. It’s like…

Andrew: It’s like people say you have a Jersey accent.

Jamie: Yeah, no, it’s like a…

Andrew: And that’s not a real accent.

Jamie: I don’t have an accent.

Andrew: Yes, you do.

Jamie: If you came here – no, okay fine, but if you came here and said to somebody what type of accent do you have, they’d say I didn’t have one, I just have a normal English accent.

Ben: Because, that’s because they’ve got like Cockney.

Jamie: Very good Benjamin, there is Cockney. There’s Cockney, sort of Birmingham, Welsh accents, Scottish accents, Northern accents, Geordie accents, all types of accents. It’s just like America. Yeah.

Micah: But Jamie, I’m curious though, wouldn’t the Queen be proud of you for teaching these kids a life lesson by stealing their pumpkins.

Jamie: Yes, she would. And if she isn’t, I’ll go down to the palace and…

Laura: [laughs] And drop-kick the queen?

Jamie: And drop-kick her, yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: She can land right in the river Thames and swim back and see how she likes it.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: Not that I have been dropped in the river Thames.

Ben: You know, I thought it was the River Thames [pronounces it ‘Thaymes’] River Thames.

Jamie: Everyone calls it the Thames [pronounces it ‘Thaymes’], first of all.

Laura: You would.

Ben: [imitating Laura] You would.

Andrew: I wouldn’t.

Ben: Andrew would probably call it the Thames [pronounces it ‘Tha-mays’].

Andrew: No, Ben, I actually – I thought it was Thames [pronounces it ‘Thaymes’] too. Okay, all right. So, what else is there to talk about.

Jamie: But yeah. Micah the Queen would be in serious trouble if she didn’t approve. Actually, should I say that? Yeah, go on then, yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: You can put that in. Put it in.

Laura: Do you think the Queen listens?

Jamie: Oh, she does, she does.

Andrew: Am I the only one…

Jamie: The Royal Podcast.

Andrew: Am I the only one…

[Micah laughs]

———————–

Written by: Micah, Adrienne, Allison, Amanda, Briana, Jessica, Judy, Margaret, Martina, Matt, Megan, Samantha, Sarah, Shannon and Shelly

Transcript #60

MuggleCast 60 Transcript


Show Intro


Andrew [Show Intro with music in background]: Because we all could use a little more love, this is MuggleCast Episode 60 for October 22nd, 2006.

See why GoDaddy.com is the number one domain registrar worldwide. Now with your domain registration, you’ll get hosting, a free blog, complete e-mail, and much more. Plus, as a MuggleCast listener, enter the code “Ron,” that’s R-O-N, when you check out and get your dot com domain name for just $6.95 a year. Get your piece of the Internet today at GoDaddy.com.


Eric’s Crackpot Theory of the Week


Andrew: Eric Scull, your crackpot theory of the week is: Dumbledore was a hairless Demiguise.

Eric: Realistically, whose beard is that long? It’s got to be – it’s got to be fake. It’s got to be a wig or maybe magically enhanced or something, but nobody’s beard is that long. Really, what you don’t know about Albus Dumbledore is that he’s been bald since birth. It’s just a character trait.

Laura: You’re supposed to be proving it, Eric.

[Kevin laughs]

Andrew: Yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: Did I ever prove them?

Laura: Yeah, you’re supposed to use, like, evidence to support the theory…

Andrew: Yes.

Eric: Oh!

Laura: …no matter how outrageous it is.

Eric: Right. Well, aren’t Demiguises the things that can go invisible?

Laura: Yeah…

Andrew: Yes.

Eric: Yes, well, easily without wearing an invisibility cloak. Even though they’re cut up…

Laura: Uh huh…

Eric: …and made into… They’re – they’re made into
invisibility cloaks. So I don’t know if that counts as not wearing one
if you’re wearing your own skin.

Andrew: So is that your answer? Is that the best you can do?

Eric: Well, I don’t know. What does…

Andrew: For the fans, for the listeners.

Eric: What does Chad, 15, from, you know, Arkansas think of that, who sent it in?

Andrew: It was actually Miranda, 17, of Idaho, and her points include:
Dumbledore can turn invisible without a cloak…

Eric: Yay! Hey!

Andrew: Another point; this would be a reason it’s weird that he had James’s cloak, even though he can turn invisible himself.

Eric: Ah, I didn’t think of that one.

Ben: Well, let’s get, let’s get her on the show. She can do…

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: She can do…

Andrew: Forget Eric.

Ben: …Eric’s Crackpot Theory better than Eric can. [laughs]

Andrew: Eric’s fired. [laughs]

Eric: Uh.

Andrew: He seems to be able to see through the invisibility cloaks.

Eric: Andrew, why does that make him a hairless Demiguise?

Andrew: I don’t know. [laughs]

Eric: I…

Andrew: She said, “I know, crazy, I almost had myself convinced before I realized just what I was saying.”


Welcome Back


Andrew: Welcome to another week of some excellent MuggleCasting, ladies and gentlemen. I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Eric and

Kevin: [simultaneously] I’m…

Kevin: Kevin Steck.

[Everyone speaks at the same time]

Eric: Oh, sorry.

Andrew: Whoa…

Eric: I forgot.

Ben: Whoa, Eric. Who do you think you are?

Eric: I forgot. I forgot my place there, just for a second.

[Andrew laughs]

Eric: I’m very sorry. I’m going to go last, in honor of myself.

Ben: And Jamie.

Laura: Good job, Eric. I’m Laura Thompson.

Eric: I’m Eric Scull.

Andrew: This would be the show where we bring you the latest in Harry Potter news, theories, discussions, all this other nonsense.

Ben: This would be the show, or this is the show?

Andrew: I think this is the show.

Ben: Okay.

Andrew: But it could be, and it will be.

Ben: I was going to say; maybe we’re doing something different this
week. Maybe we’re just going to BS the entire time.

Andrew: I don’t know. Maybe we’ll try that.

Kevin: [laughs] Oh, yeah. Something different.

Andrew: Before we do anything else, though…

Ben: Speaking of BS, let’s go to Micah Tannenbaum…

[Andrew and Kevin laugh]

Ben: …for the past week’s news.


News


Micah: It was reported after months of negotiations, JK Rowling had signed a letter of intent to the Walt Disney Company allowing them to carry out preliminary construction on a theme park with Harry Potter characters. Tuesday, a representative for Jo informed us that there is no truth to this. There goes my shot at riding Dementors of the Caribbean. That was a terrible joke.

Terry Gilliam, the acclaimed director Warner Bros. turned down for Sorcerer’s Stone, said in a new interview that he has no intention to direct either Movie 6 or 7, debunking previous rumors that he would. He was quoted as saying, “Warner Bros. had their chance the first time around, and they blew it. It’s a factory job, that’s what it is, and I know the way it’s done. I’ve had too many friends work on those movies. I know the way it works, and that’s not the way I work.”

Many Terry, retract those claws, would ya?

Gilliam went on to discuss what his Potter movie would have been like:

He said: “Alfonso Cuaron’s [Prisoner of Azkaban] is really good, but the first two I thought were just bad. They missed the whole point of it; they missed the magic of it… Alfonso did something much closer to what I would’ve done.”

Awww, somebody’s jealous. That was just too easy.

In a new interview, actor Rupert Grint spoke a little about the fifth Harry Potter movie, saying they have about a month of filming remaining. He also mentioned a Christmas scene with the Weasleys that he enjoyed, and touched on the topic of a director for Half-Blood Prince, noting rumors that Alfonso Cuaron or Chris Columbus may return for the film.

HP4U.co.uk has released a new report after visiting the Order of the Phoenix set recently. The crew was in the process of shooting scenes involving Thestrals, Hogsmeade Station, and the Hogwarts Express. Filming was located at Black Park in Buckinghamshire, England.

Finally, the American Library Association is asking teens to vote this week – why just teens? Everybody vote this week for their three favorite books with the association subsequently posting the top 10. Half-Blood Prince is among those nominated. Be sure to vote and make Laura Mallory cringe.

That’s all the news for this October 22nd, 2006 edition of MuggleCast. Back to the show.


Announcements


Andrew: Okay, thank you, Micah. Let’s take care of a few announcements.
Don’t forget to purchase your MuggleCast t-shirts because they help
support the show, and they’re very nice to wear. We have some new designs out – actually we have one new design. We have the Lumos shirts that are available. They’re pretty cool looking, so even if you didn’t go to Lumos, even if you don’t know what Lumos is, buy them because they’re cool-looking. And…

Ben: Lumos 2006. They’re very nice t-shirts.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: All the cool kids are doing it.

Andrew: Don’t forget to place your vote at Podcast Alley. We’re actually falling behind this month. We’re like, number five.

Eric: For shame.

Andrew: Yeah, there’s other podcasts beating us and it’s kind of sad,
[starts speaking quietly] so maybe if everyone could just place
their votes once a month, we could get a little higher up there. So…

Ben: Please, just once a month.

Eric: Self-conscience.

Andrew: Just once a month.

Laura: Wow.

Andrew: Okay.

Laura: Love how sad we sound.

Andrew: Bad news out of Australia. Bad news out of Australia.

Ben: We lost. Oh, my gosh.

Kevin: Awww, geez.

Andrew: Lost the Nickelodeon Australian Kids’ Choice Awards to a podcast called Camp Orange Maudecast.

Laura: What is that?

Andrew: “Which makes sense, considering it is a Nick show,” writes Megan, 18, of Australia. The Kids’ Choice Awards got some criticism in the past, I was reading on Wikipedia…

Eric: Yeah, it’s not worth it.

Andrew: …because they sort of – the winners always seem to be Nick –
Nickelodeon-related television shows.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: So, it doesn’t surprise me that we didn’t win. Even if – maybe, you know, granted, maybe we didn’t get the most votes.

Ben: We all know it’s a load of phooey, because who listens to the Camp Orange Maudecast?

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Seriously.

Andrew: It’s not even on iTunes. I tried to look it up on iTunes.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: It wasn’t there.

Eric: They have their own…

Andrew: But, thanks to everyone who did place a vote for us, we appreciate it.

Ben: So, so do us a favor. E-mail Nickelodeon, send them your complaints. [laughs]

Andrew: Let them know how you feel about this win.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: Yeah, let them know how you feel about MuggleCast getting shot down.

Andrew: Also, you might be wondering where Jamie is this week.

Eric: No.

Andrew: MuggleCast has personally paid for him to get lessons in French because he butchered the RSVP pronunciation. He thought it was “repondez s’il vous plait,” then someone e-mailed and said, “No, it’s respondez s’il vous plait,” without checking it. [laughs] So, he just said – he just trusted that one person. It actually is “repondez s’il vous plait.” Thanks to Holly, 17, of Canada.

Ben: Come on, Jamie.

Andrew: We’ll never bring it up again. Yeah, we will never bring it up again. [laughs]

Ben: Yeah.


MuggleCast at Prophecy 2007


Andrew: Also, little announcement. It’s so far – it’s so far back in the planning stages. [clears throat] It’s – we really have nothing to say, other than that – well, here, let me ask you guys something. What is the number one request that we get right now?

Ben: More Ben Schoen, I think.

Laura: [laughs] No.

Andrew: That’s number two. What’s number one?

Ben: Oh. Less Eric Scull?

[Andrew and Ben laugh]

Andrew: That’s number three.

Ben: Awww, I’m …I can’t…

Eric: [laughs] That’s…

Andrew: The number one thing people are asking us right now is, “Will you guys be at Prophecy 2007…”

Kevin: Oh, yeah.

Andrew: “…in Canada?”

Kevin: Oh.

Laura: Geez. [laughs]

Andrew: Which is August 2nd to the 5th, 2007.

Ben: Nothing good ever came out of Canada.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs]

Ben: I’m just kidding. I’m just kidding, Canadian visitors.

Eric: Well, it didn’t come from Canada, HPF is based in America.

Ben: I know, I’m just kidding.

Eric: I’m registered.

Ben: Are you really?

Andrew: The answer is – you – you signed up for Prophecy?

Eric: Yeah.

Ben: Save Gas Money. [laughs] Part two, with Eric Scull.

[Andrew and Eric laugh]

Andrew: [still laughing] Two.

Eric: Part two. I rearranged the acronym. We’re going to read Book Three from Chapter Four, “The Dementor,” on…

[Andrew laughs]

Eric: We’re just going to read all night long.

Ben: We’re going to popcorn read?

Andrew: Oh, yeah, are we?

Eric: And John Noe’s going to be there. He’s going to show up and hand
out Leaky stickers and leave.

Ben: What site?

Andrew: So if you haven’t figured it out, yes, we are planning on going to Prophecy.

Ben: Did you actually, did you actually…

Andrew: There’s no…

Ben: …talk to Melissa about this?

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: No. We haven’t talked; we haven’t talked to the Prophecy people about doing a live podcast yet, or anything. So…

Ben: But we will be there. Tentatively. Tentatively.

Kevin: Yeah.

Ben: Okay.

Andrew: Yes.

Ben: Tentatively.

Andrew: If you want to help us out, if you want to help us out, send a little e-mail to the Prophecy
people. Say, “Hey, at Lumos, the Leaky Mug did a podcast. They going to be doing one again?” You know, just drop a hint, you know? And then we’ll get in contact with them soon. So…

Ben: Yeah, so as of right now we’ll know for sure in like, probably
within the next, you know, it has to be the next month or two, we’ll
know for sure if we’re doing a podcast or not.

Andrew: I guess.

Ben: Well, you know, last time…

Laura: Maybe. [laughs]

Ben: …we knew November, and the convention was in…

Andrew: Was it November?

Laura: Yeah, it was November.

Ben: Yeah, we asked in November, and the convention was clear in…

Andrew: Oh, okay.

Ben: It was in July.

Andrew: July.

Ben: So… And this time, it’s in early August. So, yeah, Prophecy.org , I believe is the website. So…

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Go check it out. Get registered.

Andrew: Send them an e-mail.

Ben: Tell them MuggleCast sent you.

Andrew: Yeah.


Listener Rebuttal: Time


Andrew: Okay, well last week, everyone might remember that we had a great – it was a pretty good discussion on time.

Kevin: It was pretty good. I think we hurt people’s heads.

Andrew: We did. We got a lot of feedback.

Ben: I was gone. How many times did Andrew sing, [sings]
“Tiiiiiiiime”?

Andrew: Just once.

Kevin: Just once, yeah.

Andrew: [laughs] I did it for you, and then I had a little moment because you weren’t there to sing it with me.

Ben: Awww.

Andrew: It’s really touching. [laughs]

Laura: How sad.

Andrew: Anyway, we got some lengthy rebuttals. We’re going to read two of them now. One from BD, of Alabama, age is 27.

“On the subject of time – [imitates Kevin] Kevin is right. In linear time…”

Ben: About time.

Andrew: [laughs] …if someone goes back in time to change an event, then it creates a paradox. If someone wants to change an event by going back in time, and they have time travel at their disposal, they would go back in time and change the event. Now here comes the paradox; if the event has changed and all the following events were changed, why would the time traveler want to go back and change an event in the first place after the event was changed?” [laughs].

Kevin: It’s true.

Andrew: [continues reading] “In other words, the time traveler would not have any reason to go back in time to change the event, so how did it get changed? Now, if you’re still reading this, I would like to point out that this is one of JK Rowling’s more brilliant ideas in the Prisoner of Azkaban. The events that were changed by Harry and Hermione had already happened in their timeline. Buckbeak and Sirius escaped before Harry and Hermione went back in time, and they had already helped them to do it. We never saw Buckbeak executed in the book. Harry, Ron, and Hermione assumed that McNair cut off his head, but we actually saw him cut into a pumpkin. Harry and Hermione did not change anything, they did what was done. They just did not know we actually saw him cut…” [stumbles]

No…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: “They just did not know what was done which gave them a reason to go back in time and change it. Also it would be just like Dumbledore to know exactly how Buckbeak escaped when he suggested to Hermione that they could save two lives. Keep up the good work, love the show.”

That was long.

Eric: Yes, but there’s a flaw in that, which is the Harry seeing Harry across the lake and thinking it was his father because initially there would’ve had to be someone to start off that chain reaction. Like the first time Harry went back to make him see somebody across the lake and then do something.

Kevin: Yeah, but that goes into the paradox.

Laura: Yeah, but…

Kevin: It falls into a loop.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: Yeah, but

Ben: An infinite loop, right Kevin?

Kevin: Right.

Eric: I’m of the… I’m of the liking that when you go back in time it strays. Stray paradoxes, such as Back to the Future. How timelines change based on different events, if you alter…

Kevin: Yeah, like… Yes.

Eric: I don’t think it’s just one. I think time itself is comprised of a bazillion different dimensions and every little choice, every little difference that we can make in the world, creates an alternate, separate but different…

Kevin: Scenario.

Eric: …universe. And then that’s just like we’re traveling through time by going through all these things. It’s really cool. Watch Sliders, by the way, it’s this old show on Fox.


Listener Rebuttal: Time, Part Two


Ben: Let’s go to James. Let’s go to James. Let’s see what James, 105, of Baton Rouge has to say.

Andrew: That’s pretty old. Are you going to read it?

Ben: I’ll read it.

The whole time discussion was a bit convoluted. I think you should imagine time from each individual as a string. For the trio, set each string on a very long table and have an inch equal an hour. I know they’d be very long strings, but we’ll focus on the end of Year Three. Since Ron has never traveled back through time, his string would be perfectly straight. Since Harry has ever only ever gone back two hours, his would be interrupted and folded back so that there would be two inches overlapped. That is to say there would be two inches where the string was doubled. So yes, Harry would be in two places during two hours. Hermione would have that effect multiple times during the school year, since the whole idea of a Time-Turner was so she could take classes that occurred at the same time. She would have to be in two places at the same time, several times per week. So her string would be folded over in several places. As a matter of fact, if she used the Time-Turner to go back two hours each school day, that would be ten hours a week, and assuming a 44 week school year, four weeks for each summer and Christmas, she…”

Sorry I’m burping here.

“…would have aged an extra 440 hours. So, at the end of the school year she would be older by about two and a half weeks compared to if she had never touched a Time-Turner.”

Eric: So basically, it’s not even worth celebrating Hermione Granger’s birthday anymore. Because she was hitting that Time-Turner, or if you do celebrate it’s…

Kevin: Yeah, but it doesn’t – it doesn’t change the fact that it is on that day.

Eric: Huh?

Kevin: Well, her birthday is on that day.

Eric: Well, that’s true, that’s true, the birthday…

Ben: I’m confused what they’re saying. How would it make her older?

Eric: That’s true, yeah. No.

Ben: Because she was alive twice during that time?

Eric: It means – yeah, it’s still her birthday. Birth day.

Kevin: The method that person’s using to, like, judge time is from like an external observer. Like someone observing someone externally. But because everyone’s within that environment it doesn’t bode well for if you’re trying to track time and you’re a participant within the world or within that area.

Eric: So what theory did they use? Which extrapolation method? If you…

Kevin: That, that – what they’re just saying is to count how old the person is.

Eric: Yeah.

Kevin: It’s not really based on what stream of time they’re in because we’re all within the same…

Eric: I know it. I just kind of got an idea of the Greek; the three ladies with the scissors. The – what were they? The seers or whoever.

Laura: The Fates?

Eric: Yeah, the Fates, of course, the Fates! Who cut your string and determine when you are going to die. And in Hercules they sing and they dance. And…

Kevin: Nice.

Eric: …that’s it.

Andrew: It was just an interesting way that James put it, I think, using the strings because it’s an easier way to demonstrate. Basically, Ben, you asked earlier, what are they saying by how she aged earlier. When she’s going back in time, she has to relive up to the point where she originally went back in time. So she’s still aging. Her aging does not stop. Follow?

Ben: Oh, I see what you are saying.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: I got you.

[Laura laughs]

Kevin: We did mention a problem with this last show, where if you go
back in time too far you won’t have enough time to catch up before you die.

Eric: [laughs] Of old age?

[Laura laughs]

Kevin: Of old age. So…

Laura: Yeah.

Kevin: …You know, the repercussions of that.

Andrew: We’ll get to some more rebuttals later.

Ben: That’s weird. It’s all confusing.

Andrew: It is.

Ben: I’m going to time travel.

Kevin: I got so many emails about people saying we made their head hurt.

Eric: Yeah, and it was an episode without me.

Laura: There were actually people who didn’t like the show. There were
people who thought that we went in too many circles.

Andrew: Really?

Ben: Well, that’s time travel for you.

Eric: Time is circular.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: History repeats itself, get used to it.


Main Discussion: The Department of Mysteries


Andrew: Let’s get into our main discussion now. I think this might be the final part of our Department of Mysteries discussion.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: It’s basically a wrap-up of everything else that we did not discuss already, between time and the Veil.

Laura: Well, we talked about, as Andrew said, the Veil and time which I think were the two biggest things that were focused on during the Department of Mysteries chapters. But there were a lot of other little things in there that I think a lot of people are wondering about.


Ministry Access Too Easy?


The first of which is why was it so easy for Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Luna, and the Death Eaters to get into the ministry that night. There was no security. Why was that? Harry even noted that he felt ominous that there was no security; he felt there should have been. Why was there no one in the Ministry that night?

Ben: So JK Rowling could write a story.

Andrew: Well what gets me…

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Closed for writing session.

Laura: Okay…

Ben: No, no okay, if you were to as JK Rowling this question, and I was just being a wisenheimer [pauses], like usual.

Andrew: Oh, Ben, you are a wisenheimer.

Laura: Which you are so often.

Ben: I am such a wisenheimer.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: The reason there was no security; maybe they were distracted with something else. Hmmm.

Laura: Like what?

Kevin: Yeah, I mean.

Andrew: But the entire Ministry of Magic?

Ben: Yes.

Laura: Yeah, okay.

Ben: Yeah.

Kevin: But it’s not the entire Ministry. It’s somewhat of a workplace. So, I mean go into any of your financial buildings at twelve midnight and you’re going to find maybe three or four people there. A security guard…

Andrew: The janitor.

Kevin: The janitors.

Ben: Right, right.

Kevin: Maybe the person staying late…

Ben: But this is different, though.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: This is the fabled Department of Mysteries.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: This is not the lobby at the Ministry of Magic. This is…

Andrew: Well, that’s the thing that got me. They were able to just go into the elevator and select Department of Mysteries.

Laura: And then just open the door and go in.

Andrew: And they go in.

Laura: Yeah, there was no one guarding it.

Andrew: It’s like even at hotels, exclusive rooms you need a key card to get in. [laughs]

Kevin: Yeah, I was always under the impression there were preparations made by Death Eaters to arrange that.

Eric: Yeah, because they’re waiting for him.

Laura: Yeah but how’d they do that?

Eric: Well, they have contacts. Lucius Malfoy…

Kevin: Oh I’m sure.

Eric: It’s not like he would pay…

Kevin: Through curses. Yeah I mean…

Laura: What do you think that Malfoy paid off…

Eric: No it’s…

Laura: Whatever, that Eric guy to leave, the security guy.

Kevin: Or put him under a curse.

Andrew: Not paid off.

Eric: Or did something, I mean I’m not saying he paid off…

Ben: The Death Eaters arrived first, correct?

Laura: Yes.

Eric: Well, they were waiting for Harry.

Ben: Okay, well maybe it’s a case like we saw in Sorcerer’s
Stone
, where Quirrell pretty much cleared the pathway for Harry to get to the final area, maybe the Death Eaters had already taken care of the security measures, and made it – because, you know, their goal was to lure Harry into the Ministry of Magic, and if there’s extraneous or extra security, then it’s going to be more difficult for them to do it. So…

Laura: Yeah, but it’s still the Department of Mysteries. How were they able to just walk into it?

Eric: Also, remember they are Voldemort and they can’t let the Ministry see Voldemort, or whatever, so they have to protect themselves too. But, no, that’s not the example I want to use. Was it even midnight, guys? I was under the impression that everybody was just out at lunch, or…

Everyone: No!

Andrew: It wasn’t during the afternoon.

Laura: It was night time.

Eric: Because… Are you sure?

Kevin: Yeah, they were talking about…

Andrew: The sun was rising.

Laura: The sun was rising when Harry…

Andrew: When he got into…

Laura: …got back to Dumbledore’s office.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: So, it took place during the night.

Eric: Well, okay, but I was under the impression that everybody was wandering back into the lobby right after, you know, the whole fight occurred.

Laura: No, Harry heard people…

Eric: As if coming back from lunch.

Laura: Yeah, he said he heard people going to breakfast and he couldn’t believe that people were still enjoying a meal knowing what he’d just been through.

Andrew: Mhm. Yeah.

Eric: Well, that was the next day. I mean at – in the lobby, right after the fountain, you know, exploded, Fudge was like, “Oooh, look the fountain. Yes, I saw him too.” But then people were kind of wandering back in like, “What just happened here?” Like, “Where were they?”

Laura: Well, that was… [laughs] Well, that was because…

Eric: It’s not that…

Laura: …by the time, by the time…

Kevin: They had got alerted by that point.

Laura: Exactly! By the time all this was happening, the Aurors had already been alerted [laughs].

Kevin: They had been monitoring this place, figuring out the…

Ben: Don’t you think the Aurors would be, you know, guarding the Department of Mysteries? Especially…

Laura: Exactly. Why was no one there? And why were they able to just open a door and walk in?

Eric: Maybe all the…

Andrew: But then…

Eric: No. Wasn’t the Auror on guard in Voldemort’s circle or something?

Laura: Ummm…

Eric: One of them. He could’ve just stepped aside and let them in. I don’t know. I don’t think it’s a big issue.

Kevin: But that’s what I’m saying.

Laura: There was no one there, though.

Kevin: I was always under the impression that they had taken
preparations beforehand.

Laura: Yes.

Kevin: They had placed a couple people under a curse…

Andrew: Right. Right.

Kevin: …and made it so that come X hour, leave or get lost.

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: And then they can just stroll in.

Eric: Laura, are you even…

Kevin: Those people who are guarding the place are also the same people
who…

Ben: That’s the only logical explanation.

Kevin: Yeah, I mean.

Ben: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah, I suppose.

Ben: Voldemort may have… Of course Voldemort, you know… Voldemort has insiders
in the Ministry, so he may have – probably in the Department of
Mysteries too. So, he may have had someone come on either…

Kevin: Yeah. They’re resourceful people.

Ben: Well, yeah, they are.

Kevin: It’s not like they don’t know what they’re doing.
[laughs]

[Eric laughs]

Andrew: I don’t know about the elevator, though. Because…

Laura: Yeah, and just the fact that they were able to walk into the
Ministry like there was no – it wasn’t locked, for instance. They walked
into the phone booth and they just said, “We’re here to save Sirius,”
and it prints them off these little badges that say Rescue Mission.

Andrew: Rescue Mission.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: Well, one door was locked, [laughs] and that brings us to…

Laura: Well, actually…

Andrew: No. It just seemed like the only security was when they got
into the circular room…

Eric: Well, put it this way.

Andrew: …where the doors are staying.

Eric: There’s a 100,000 people, say, work at the Ministry or
whatever or however big it is – however they choose how big it is. They
all have to get through the lobby and get where they’re going. I
approve of the idea of like a club card for getting into the Department of
Mysteries, but remember it’s also on the same floor as Department of
Mysteries. There’s what, the old chambers for trial?

Laura: The courtrooms.

Eric: And isn’t there Arthur Weasley’s office?

Laura: But they aren’t used, really, anymore.

Eric: I don’t know.

Laura: No, and Arthur’s office is not there.

Eric: It’s not there? I…

Laura: No it is not.

Eric: I’m all aflutter.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: But you’d think that – you think that even though you can still
get up there, that there’d be at least someone guarding the door.

Laura: [laughs] Exactly.

Eric: I don’t know.

Andrew: Well that’s…

Kevin: Yeah, but that’s…

Andrew: The Death Eaters would take that guy out.

Kevin: Exactly.


Why No Order Presence?


Laura: But what’s interesting to me is why didn’t the Order have anyone
there? Because we know that Arthur had been guarding that place, so
clearly they’d been taking precautions to guard the Department of
Mysteries.

Kevin: Yeah, but I mean count how many Death Eaters were there.

Laura: Sure.

Kevin: Do you think one person would stand a chance against all those
Death Eaters?

Laura: Well, no. But still why wasn’t…

Kevin: They may have not been mentioned…

Eric: Dumbledore would.

Laura: anyone there?

Kevin: …but I’m fairly sure that there was some protection, and they
just bypassed it through either cursing the person, or…

Ben: Right. But with a place this important – it’s like when a robber
goes and sticks up a convenience store or a bank. There’s always the
button that alerts the police under the table. You know? You think…

Kevin: Yeah, but that’s what I’m saying. For…

Ben: …if someone’s getting taken out, wouldn’t they have a way to alert
other people?

Eric: Voldemort and Harry Potter both needed to get into the Department
of Mysteries. They’re the two strongest forces throughout this entire
book series. Did they really need to try?

Kevin: No, it’s not – it’s not that.

[Laura laughs]

Kevin: It’s that the people who are guarding that type of place and who have access to that
place are going to be the people they’re going to curse and have remove – have to remove the security.

Eric: Voldemort’s been concentrating on this Department of Mysteries
for the entire year. The Order knows it.

Kevin: Yeah, that’s what I’m saying.

Eric: The Order has been…

Kevin: He’s pretty resourceful.

Eric: Yeah.

Laura: So why didn’t we hear about anyone in the Order being cursed
when they were trying to protect the Department of Mysteries? That’s what
I’m saying.

Eric: That other guy was.

Laura: If anyone – I know. But if anyone had been there that night,
then we would have heard about them being cursed as well, unless they flew
the coop when they realized what was going on.

Kevin: Well you know Mr. Weasley was guarding it, right?

Laura: Yes.

Kevin: Okay. Well, what if Mr. Weasley – they obviously found Mr. Weasley
there very injured. Now the Order – not the Order, but the Ministry, goes
“What were you doing there after hours? Why were you there?” Okay? So
now they have just blown their cover, making it impossible for them to
put another person there because it’s going to get highly suspicious…

Laura: But didn’t they…

Kevin: …to the Ministry.

Eric: Kind of like…

Laura: Didn’t they cover it up?

Andrew: Yeah, didn’t Dumbledore say… Didn’t Dumbledore say they made
up an excuse for it?

Laura: Yeah, exactly.

Andrew: I’m pretty sure he did.

Laura: Because Sirius…

Kevin: Well, even then. I mean…

Eric: Even if they have an excuse, people are going to turn their eye.

Kevin: For all you know, Arthur was the only one who had the
possibility of having access to that area without suspicion.

Andrew: Right. If everyone else is sitting down there, it would look
suspicious.

Kevin: Exactly. So the Order probably – that was their last form of
defense, and it got blown by him getting injured.

Eric: Attacked by the snake, yeah.

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Good job, Arthur.

Eric: And that’s why… No, that’s not Arthur’s fault. That was
Voldemort’s plan.

Andrew: And that technically did blow their cover because Arthur
couldn’t go there again and sit down there.

Eric: That’s right, because…

Laura: Well no, obviously not him.

Kevin: So right there you have your explanation for why…

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: …there wasn’t an Order member there.

Andrew: Good point, Kevin, good point!

Laura: It just seems odd to me, though, that there wouldn’t be some sort of
security on it anyway. Like even when our…

Kevin: But that’s what I’m saying.

Laura: Even when Arthur was there, though. Why isn’t there some sort of
security on this place 24/7?

Eric: Well, another thing, Laura. Remember, everybody’s under the
impression that everything is sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows. Voldemort’s
not back, what do we have to protect ourselves from?

Laura: Yeah, that’s true.

Kevin: Yep.

Eric: That’s a strong mindset of everybody. Strong mindset.


Brain Room


Laura: Well, the next thing that we should probably move on to is
whenever they enter the Department of Mysteries, the first thing they come
across is the brain room. And we saw that Ron got attacked by one of the
brains when he yelled “Accio Brain,” which I found kind of amusing.
[laughs] But Madam Pomfrey said that “thoughts can leave deeper
scarring than almost anything else.” Now are we talking physically, or does
he have some kind of mental scarring? Because it doesn’t seem to me
like Jo would kind of drop that little hint for no reason.

Ben: I think it has to be mental, because…

Kevin: Yeah. Definitely.

Eric: No, it’s very physical too.

Ben: How could a thought harm you physically?

Laura: Well, no, she’s talking about how he had scars on his arms from
where they had wrapped themselves around him.

Eric: When they had wrapped around. And, yeah. It’s not just emotional
scarring.

Laura: Mhm.

Eric: I think that’s very physical. Thoughts too.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: They’re not just memories.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: They’re thoughts trapped in the brains that had made them. It’s kind of like – if a person passes away, they have all these memories of, you know, everywhere they’ve been in their life, different life experiences.

Laura: Well, yeah. The mind’s very powerful.

Eric: But nobody can see them! How can you retrieve those thoughts?
They’re gone with that person, they’re exact things. But trapped in this brain
room, in these things, all these thoughts – maybe it’s all the hateful
thoughts that, you know? But all these thoughts are trapped in this juicy
brain that’s going to come out and lash at you, and I don’t know. She
said that it was thoughts that were attacking him, and I would think
that would have a strict physical impact too. Because have you ever had
thoughts come at you? [laughs] I mean, how would…

Laura: Well actually, a good example, a good example of it is, have
you ever heard of when people die, the…

Eric: Never heard of that.

Laura: …electricity that… [laughs] Eric!

Eric: Sorry, it was just a question.

[Kevin laughs]

Laura: When people die, it has been accounted that the electricity
released from their brains has been powerful enough to stop clocks.

Eric: So when their…

Laura: So that it stops the clock at the exact time of their death. So I think it goes
to show that thoughts could be powerful enough to physically harm someone as well as mentally. My question is, does Ron posses those thoughts now? Does he have memories from the brain that attacked him that at one time belonged to someone else?

Kevin: I doubt it.

Eric: I doubt it.

Ben: But how do we know where those brains come from? I mean…

Laura: Well, yeah. Exactly.

Ben: It seems to me like each part of the Ministry has it’s own – each
part of the Department of Mysteries studies its own things. There’s the
death, love, all of that stuff. So, what do you think they’re studying?
What do you think they’re studying – are they studying thoughts, or what are
they…

Laura: They’re studying the mind, I believe.

Ben: Or memories, or what?

Laura: I mean, there’s a huge – the mind was a huge theme in Order
of the Phoenix
. I mean, just because of Harry’s Occlumency lessons.

Ben: And the mind is a mystery too. So…

Laura: Yeah, and Snape essentially told Harry that the mind is not…

Eric: An open book.

Laura: …a book to be opened and read at will. It’s got to be studied
very, very closely, I suppose. Differently. And I don’t know how
exactly they came across these brains, if they just yanked them out of dead
people’s heads or what.

Eric: Well, what did… [laughs] What did – crap, I forgot
my question.

Laura: What did they…

Eric: Wasn’t Ron already delusional? Wasn’t he already kind of messed up when
the brain started attacking him?

Kevin: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah, he’d been cursed by a Death Eater. And I thought that was
interesting because the reaction that he has is sort of similar to the
reaction Dumbledore has from drinking the green potion in Half-Blood
Prince
. They were both kind of delusional and out of it, and both
started saying, you know, “No, no, stop it, Harry,” and trying to get
Harry to help them, and Harry couldn’t in those scenarios.

Eric: Well, whereas nothing was attacking Dumbledore visibly, but a
brain, [laughs] a giant brain with thoughts was lashing at Ron.

Laura: It doesn’t matter, though!

Eric: It does!

Laura: It’s still facts, though.

Eric: True. It’s a brilliant parallel. I think it’s cool.

Laura: And this is why I’m kind of – I don’t know. I just kind of
wonder if Ron somehow has some sort of important memory that will play a
role in Book Seven? Something that Harry needs to know?

Eric: I don’t think that’s it at all.

Laura: Because…

Eric: You know…

Laura: Why not, though?

Eric: “Where’d you learn this, Ron?” “Oh, it was when that brain
attacked me. I learned all this stuff that I’ve just had…”

Laura: Well, no. [laughs]

Eric: “…sitting around in my head for two years.”

Kevin: Yeah. And didn’t mention it.

Eric: Yeah, I didn’t mention it.

Laura: It wouldn’t be like that. It would – but it almost seems like
there are a lot of things that happened at the end of Order of the
Phoenix
that we didn’t hear anything about in Half-Blood
Prince
.

Eric: It’s true. It’s true. But we did hear…

Ben: Like hat about the guy who turned into a baby? What kind of crap is
that? I still don’t get that.

Laura: Yeah. [laughs]

Eric: His head.

Andrew: The Death Eater? Yeah.

Eric: His head was de-aging, and then aging again. That was pretty
messed up.

Andrew: We talked about that last week.

Eric: “You can’t hurt a baby!” But no. The whole idea, and why I
brought that up is because I just think that when Ron was in the hospital
ward, he was clearly getting remedies for that curse, and I think it was
just all washed off. I think that the thoughts, all the trauma from the thoughts.

Laura: I don’t think so.

Eric: I don’t think…

Kevin: I think there would be some residue.

Laura: There was going to be something left there.

Eric: But thoughts?

Kevin: There’s got be something in his head.

Eric: You’ve got to look at the way the brain was in contact with Ron. The thoughts were burning into his skin and stuff, and lashing at him, and grabbing him; but it didn’t really do any – we didn’t see it affect his mind. He was just really under that other curse and he was really scared.

Laura: Not that we know of. [laughs]

Kevin: We don’t know; that’s a point. We don’t know of anything happening to his mind, but they alluded to it.

Laura: We only see – yeah. We only see the world through Harry’s eyes, so we can’t sit here and say, “I know what’s going on in Ron’s mind,” because it’s not from his point of view.

Eric: That’s true. I don’t know that there is much of an argument that that thing really affected him, emotionally or for a long time.

Laura: I don’t know, I just think that the mind is an exceedingly powerful thing.

Eric: Oh, yes.

Laura: It really is.

Eric: Absolutely.

Laura: And I think it’s pretty shortsighted to think that that’s – that you could be attacked by a brain like that and not have any sort of repercussions, physical or mental.

Eric: Well, he had a lot of physical repercussions. He was torn up, it was pretty dirty, but…

Laura: But we didn’t hear that much about that. That’s the thing.

Eric: Which is true.

Laura: It seemed like Madam Pomfrey was going to lengths to cure the scarring as best she could, but she said…

Ben: Well, how do you think all this is going to come full-circle, is what I want to know. I mean, how is that going to play to the…

Eric: Ummm, Ben? I hate to let you down: We don’t know. [laughs]

Ben: I know, that’s why I said how do you “think,” okay? No reason to be a smart aleck.

Eric: I don’t mean to.

Ben: I’m the wisenheimer here, okay? I’m just kidding.

[Ben and Laura laugh]

Ben: What I’m saying is, I don’t know how – think about all the stuff she has to incorporate. Something like that…

Laura: Yeah, there’s a lot.

Ben: …seems like it is going to go to the wayside just because she doesn’t have – I mean, unless it’s really pivotal. It’s interesting. What did he get from the Department of Mysteries? But the fact that it went ignored in Book Six and nothing really was carried through. You think if Ron had some thought that was essential that it would somehow get mentioned.

Andrew: Stood out?

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: It would’ve happened by now.

Laura: Well, I don’t know because if you think back on all the books, there have been tons of little things that no one thought anything of at the time. And then a couple of books later that thing becomes huge. There are probably hundreds of little clues in Half-Blood Prince that we all missed. Just little things. Little things that people have said, descriptions about the way someone looked or where someone went.

Eric: Yes, but when have we seen Ron distribute any kind of extra knowledge than he would have by being his slightly cynical self?

Laura: I don’t think – I don’t know. The thing is, I think if something like that were to happen she would try to draw attention away from it during the sixth book, because she drew attention away from the Department of Mysteries.

Eric: She drew attention away from everything.

Laura: Exactly, because there is clearly something kind of big going on. [laughs]

Eric: [laughs] There’s no doubting it’s plausible that Ron has some thoughts from this thing, I just don’t think it’s likely.


Whose Brains Are In The Brain Room?


Andrew: And whose brains get into the Brain Room?

Laura: That’s what I was going to say. If he does have someone’s thoughts, are we going to find out whose brains these are?

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: Maybe they saved James’ and Lily’s brain and then…

Laura: Ewww.

Eric: …and then Ron can tell Harry where Godric’s Hollow is.

Ben: I almost think it’s like kind of the case where you have people who donate their bodies to science. Wouldn’t it be the same thing if you donate your brain?

Eric: To the Ministry of Magic? [laughs]

Ben: Yeah.

Laura: [laughs] And then they donate their bodies to be thrown into the Veil to see what happens to them, Ben?

[Kevin laughs]

Ben: Yeah.

Eric: I’m going to wear my – I’m going to get a t-shirt.

Andrew: I would.

Ben: Well, how else would they do it? Would they just randomly choose people? Or…

Andrew: [laughs] Off the street.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Ben: [laughs] Do they just say, “Your brain is mine!” and you die? Or…

[Laura and Kevin laugh]

Ben: No, it isn’t like they can…

Laura: Well, what if they take unclean bodies or something like that?

Eric: John Does of the world.

Ben: Well, that’s really pleasant.

Eric: What if you went up to…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Unclean bodies. [laughs]

Laura: Well, hey! They did that for that exhibit with all the dead bodies which I went and saw in Vegas. It was actually pretty cool.

Eric: Guys, what if you went up to anybody on the street and just said, “Accio Brain!” [laughs] What would happen?

Andrew: I don’t think their brain would…

Ben: Fly out of their head.

Kevin: Pop out of their head or their body.

Andrew: I don’t know, I don’t know.

Ben: I think they’d laugh at you.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: Either way, one thing’s for certain…

Andrew: Like how people laughed at you when you walked through New York City in your cloak.

[Kevin laughs]

Eric: They didn’t laugh. They were awed, and you guys were all jealous.

Laura: Oooh, burned.

Andrew: They were awed. Right.

[Kevin and Laura laugh]

Ben: They see there is so much diversity in New York City it’s normal for them.

[Everyone laughs]

Kevin: It’s a normal thing.

Andrew: That’s true.

Eric: That’s exciting, but I’m definitely going to get a t-shirt, since we’re talking about this, that says, “I donated my brain to the Ministry of Magic because they needed one.”

Laura: That’s…nice.

Ben: You have to have a brain to donate. So…

[Kevin laughs]

Andrew: Pickle of Shame. Oooh.

Kevin: Oooh.


What Makes Eric’s Brain Worthy?


Laura: Well, Eric, Eric, what would make your brain worthy? [laughs] I’m not trying to insult you.

Eric: Of the Ministry of Magic?

[Andrew, Ben, and Laura laugh]

Eric: Perhaps it won’t be, you’re incredibly correct, Laura.

Laura: No, no, no, I’m kind of…

Eric: Maybe they would refuse it. Maybe my dying wishes would be for the Ministry to have my brain, and they wouldn’t want it…

[Laura laughs]

Eric: …and they would just throw it away.

Laura: I’m kind of alluding to what would…

Eric: Specifications?

Laura: …be the requirements? Yeah! What would…

Eric: I would think it would be anybody they could get. I mean, learned professors, obviously, they would want, like Nicholas Flamel.

Kevin: Willing to, yeah.

Eric: Maybe Nicholas Flamel? Maybe they could have asked him to donate his mind to the think tank, which is the brain bath.

Ben: Think tank. [laughs] That’s literally what it is.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: The brain thing…tub…brains.

Ben: The brain tub.

Eric: They would want to get him if they were studying the mind, but I think they would also try and get lower of minds. Perhaps like mine, just to judge the diversity of minds.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: Isn’t it true you need brains of all sizes, and all shapes, and all – to do a real study?

Kevin: Yeah, but…

Andrew: To do a real study of them?

Eric: Yeah.

Laura: You need brains of all types of capacity.

[Andrew and Eric laugh]

Eric: Yes.

Laura: For intelligence.

Eric: That’s what I mean. But who knows? Maybe the Ministry wouldn’t want my brain.

Kevin: I would think it would be more of a…

Ben: I think that if you donated it…

Kevin: …donation kind of thing.

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Because it’s not like now.

Kevin: It’s unethical to…

Ben: The unclaimed bodies…

Kevin: It’s unethical to…

Ben: The unclaimed bodies you’re talking about…

Kevin: Yeah.

Ben: …are homeless people they found dead in the alley, you know?

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, right.

Ben: The exhibit in Vegas.

Eric: Can you imagine the UPS guy? “I got a delivery of brains for C.O. Fudge.”

Laura: [laughs] Damon.

[Andrew fake laughs]

Eric: C.O. Fudge? Delivery of brains? “Just dump them in the think tank there.”

Andrew: Yeah. Yeah.

Ben: [laughs] Quit calling it the think tank.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: It’s a good name! Is that not a good name?

Ben: [laughs] That is a good name, but it sounded so goofy.


Back To The Scarring


Andrew: So, anyway, I don’t know. Back to Madam Pomfrey.

Laura: I think we’re…

Andrew: It just seemed, “Thoughts can leave deeper scarring than almost anything else.” Maybe she’s just saying in general.

Kevin: Yeah, but it’s…

Andrew: Your thoughts, your personal thoughts.

Kevin: It sort of alludes to her talking not only physical scarring.

Laura: Yeah, that’s what I’m saying.

Andrew: I just don’t see how they can transfer to your body because it’s a brain. It doesn’t really make sense.

Eric: Yeah, she didn’t really say…

Laura: It touched your body.

Andrew: So?

Laura: It’s magic, though.

Ben: Right, but see, there is something different, though – something different, though. Dumbledore stressed the importance of how death isn’t it. How if you look to the bad side, the evil side in Harry Potter, that’s what they’re concerned most about. The good side is always concerned about sacrifice, and what is the best thing that I can do to benefit humankind in general. As opposed to, I’m going to be selfish and worry about myself dying. So, it seems to me like the physical sense – it applies physically because he has the scars or whatever, but I think mentally it makes more sense because…

Kevin: It does, yeah.

Ben: …your thoughts. Look to Harry and Voldemort. Maybe she was saying something that meant a lot more than she knew, you? Because…

Laura: You know what I’m going to do? I’m going to…

Ben: …the thoughts have deeper scarring than anything else. Look at Voldemort sent those thoughts into Harry’s brain, and the next thing we know, Harry shows up at the Ministry of Magic, Sirius dies, Ron gets hurt. All these bad things happen.

Eric: Yeah. Exactly, exactly.

Ben: So, I think that is the deeper scarring happening.

Eric: When Dumbledore talks about how life – death is not the worst thing, he’s actually talking about the scarring of the soul that Voldemort’s gotten. There’s a lot of soul stuff. That’s all the references there with impartial souls.

Laura: Mhm. Well, what he’s basically saying is that Voldemort, the life that he has given himself now, is actually worse than what he’s fearing.

Eric: Oh yeah, absolutely. But the thought of thoughts is what Ben eventually said, which was, you know, my opinion, which is: The thoughts drive the mind. You said the mind was a great, big theme in Order of the Phoenix. Well, the mind controls the people and the people do the evil. The people do – they change history, and this is all about people. The mind is the most powerful thing because it drives you, and thoughts – and if you think that Mudbloods are worthless, it’s everything. It ties into literally everything. It’s untraceable where this is going.


Sidenote: Episode 60


Andrew: By the way, guys, I forgot to mention this at the beginning of the show. 60 episodes.

Laura: Oh, yeah.

Kevin: Oh, yeah. Wow.

Andrew: 60 episodes.

Eric: Not too shabby.

Andrew: Good job, boys and girls.

Eric: Not too shabby.

Andrew: No, not at all. It’s an impressive number.

Laura: I think it’s time for us to start thinking about retirement.

Andrew: Yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: You have…

Andrew: Apply for Medicare in a few years.

Laura: Dentures.

[Kevin laughs]

Ben: Well, Social Security is almost gone – run out. So…

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Eric: And we dumped our own fund on Lumos.

Andrew: Yep.

Eric: All our retirement funds were spent on going to Los Angeles.

Andrew: On Lumos. Anyway, here’s to 60 more. It’s a big number, 60.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: Well, it’s not as big as 61.

Andrew: What have we been talking about all this time?

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: How did we come up with – You know that’s the number one thing I get asked by people who don’t listen to the show.

Ben: “What do you talk about?” Yeah, same here.

Andrew: “What do…” Exactly!

Kevin: “What do you keep talking about?” Yeah.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah. We have had a discussion every week. Whether it was Chapter-by-Chapter, or Character Discussion, or something like this.


Chapter-By-Chapter Return?


Ben: I keep getting e-mails. “Is Chapter-by-Chapter coming back? Is Chapter-by-Chapter coming back?”

Eric: Yeah, guys. Should we lay that down?

Andrew: Should we settle this?

Ben: Yeah. I think Chapter-by-Chapter should come back eventually because we’re going to run out of things to talk about and in order to – what’s the word I’m looking for – preserve the longevity of MuggleCast, we’ll need something that is going to do that.

[Andrew and Ben laugh]

Eric: I don’t know. I don’t want you guys to just strategically pull it out of your pocket when we’re short on episode stuff. We did talk – we did have a meeting about this.

Andrew: Well, that’s the plan, so…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: We have been getting a lot of e-mails about this, and we haven’t really brought it up because we didn’t want to upset anyone who is really missing it. [laughs] But we did talk about this. We had a lengthy discussion about this in L.A.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: Well, I had a lengthy discussion.

Laura: It was very lengthy.

Andrew: Yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: We’re going to hold off on it for now. But it’ll come back. Just not right now.


Back to Discussion: The Love Room


Laura: The next room that they encountered was the Love Room, which was locked. They couldn’t get into it. How would a room contain the power of love?

Eric: [sings] It’s the power of love!

Andrew: The Black Eyed Peas song, “Where is the Love?” plays when you walk in.

Eric: [sings] Da-da-da.

Andrew: [sings] Where is the love…?

Ben: [laughs] And there’s a sign that points, “Over here.”

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: No.

[Everyone continues laughing]

Laura: So, if they open the door, would there just be [laughs] this blinding light – power of love – that would spill out of the room?

Eric: Yes!

Laura: Or is it – okay, how do you contain something like love behind a door?

Eric: Okay, think of Raiders of the Lost Ark. Have you seen the movie? Have you all seen Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark? Of course.

Laura: Yes. [laughs]

Eric: At the end of the move, the Ark of the Covenant breaks open and the big white light comes out and everybody has to – well, Indie has to close his eyes because the thing is, the sight is too holy for anybody to see it without their faces getting ripped off.

Andrew: Uh-huh.

Laura: So, you’re saying it’s so great, it’s so wonderful.

Eric: It’s – yeah. Dumbledore himself said…

Laura: [laughs] That it would rip Harry’s face off?

Eric: No, no, not Harry’s.

[Kevin and Laura laugh]

Eric: And that’s very important. But it is locked because, well, Dumbledore himself said it needs to be measured in certain quantities and it’s just of a really big magnitude or something. Dumbledore said something exactly like that about – maybe you need to see, maybe you need to wear a smoked glass mask like a welder’s mask to go into it. I mean, I don’t know, but I’m saying it’s locked because my guess…

Laura: Well, it melted Harry’s knife.

Eric: My guess is that the large majority of people would not be able to handle that room. No. As for containing the power of love in that room, I have no clue, but it is the Ministry of Magic and if a love – if a concentration of love would be somewhere intelligent for study, it should be there. I don’t know.


The Definition of Love


Laura: It just seems like how do you – people can’t even come up with a definition for love, so how do you contain it?

Ben: If you ask some high-schoolers it’s…

Eric: Well, no, I don’t think…

Ben: …you’ve been dating somebody for two days…

Laura: [sings] What is love? Baby, don’t hurt me.

Ben: And, “Oh my god, I’m so in love!”

Andrew: Yeah.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: No, exactly.

Ben: I think I love Subway more than most high-schoolers love their boyfriend or girlfriend.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Eric: No, Laura. I think – no, you don’t need to understand what love is to contain it. That’s not…

Ben: That reminds me of a song.

Eric: That goes against science. You…

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: [sings] “I want to know what love is…”

[Eric sings guitar riff]

Ben: [sings] “…I want you to show me.”

Laura: No, shut up.

Eric: No, seriously.

[Ben laughs]

Eric: You contain things so that you can study them. You trap an insect – a lightning bug – to see what it does. It’s almost like you know how to catch it before you know what it is you have. That’s true about everything.

Laura: Okay, Eric. How do you catch love?

[Kevin laughs]

Eric: Here, lovey, lovey, lovey, lovey, lovey.

Ben: It’s like a firefly.

Eric: Here, lovey, lovey, lovely, lovey.

Andrew: Guys…

Laura: I’m sorry, but…

Ben: Love bug. Love bug.

Laura: …I just don’t see how it can all – like you can just open a door and there’s love in the air.

Eric: All I’m saying is you don’t…

Laura: [laughs] That’s kind of messed up.

Andrew: I think – you know, guys, hold on, hold on.

Eric: You don’t need to be the most educated person in the world and know all about the facets of love. You just need to know how to capture it. And a lot of people who want to capture things just need to know – learn how to catch it.

Ben: Love is… Love is… Okay, love is intangible. There is no such things as, like, “Oh look, watch guys, you caught the love bug!”

Laura: It doesn’t… This doesn’t have to relate to “love” because I know Ben was making fun of teenagers in love. But anytime in any of your lives that you have ever been attracted to somebody, did you just look at that person and say, “I think I want to be attracted to this person”? No, it just happens. It just happens out of the blue. You can’t control it. So how do you…

Ben: Well what kind of attraction are you talking? Physical or…

Laura: I’m just – I’m talking about just a general attraction, whether it be personality, appearance, whatever. You still have that kind of attraction and you can’t just capture that. You can’t just say, “I have this,” because you have no control over it. It’s the same way with love.

Ben: Like I was saying, love is intangible. It’s not like you can buy love.

Laura: [laughs] So…


Capturing Love


Eric: So, what are we talking about here?

Laura: So, what I’m saying is, Eric, you’re saying you have to know how to capture it…

Eric: No, I’m saying you don’t have to know.

Laura: …but you can’t.

Eric: I’m saying you don’t have to know.

Kevin: But what Laura’s saying is there’s nothing physical that you can actually capture…

Laura: Yeah.

Kevin: …because no one knows what you’re capturing.

Eric: Yes, but it’s magic.

Kevin: You can’t capture something that you don’t know what it is, you know what I’m saying?

Eric: Oh yeah? Voldemort knew – made all his Horcruxes.

Kevin: It’s as though the firefly – in your firefly example it’s as though the firefly was just like pure light. You can’t capture it. Every time you try to grab it, your hand goes through it because you don’t know enough about it to actually create a physical boundary on it.

Eric: True, but Voldemort created seven Horcruxes. Assumably, nobody knew how to do that before him. Maybe he invented it.

Laura: Okay, but a Horcrux is a physical thing.

Eric: Yes, but it’s things along the magic world that very few people know about. It’s the extremes of what you can do to your mortal soul. Or immortal soul, as the case may be.

Laura: Okay, but love isn’t an object.

Eric: Love is everything. Maybe love is like The Force.

[Kevin and Laura laugh]

Kevin: Eric…

Laura: God… [laughs]

Andrew: Laura, how much.. Where does it… Do you have where they talk about the Love Room in here?

Laura: [laughs] The Love Room.

Eric: They don’t talk about the Love Room, it gets mentioned and then it’s like…

Andrew: Yeah. Where it’s mentioned.

Laura: No, basically, Dumbledore said that – he didn’t specifically call it the “Love Room.”

Eric: He says, “there is a room in the Department of Mysteries that contains a force…” something.

Laura: He said, “it contains the power that you have in such great quantities that Voldemort detests.”

Eric: Yeah. “Love?”

Andrew: Ooooh…

Eric: He’s like, “Yes, essentially it’s love.”


Why is the Love Room Locked?


Laura: Okay, but here’s my question: Why is the Love Room locked?

Eric: Because, I said, a lot of people can’t handle that much love.

Laura: Okay, this isn’t Raiders or whatever, Raiders of the Lost Ark.

Kevin: Raiders of the Lost Ark.

Eric: Why is it not?

Laura: This is Harry Potter.

Eric: No, it’s the same concept.

Laura: Because!

Eric: It’s the same concept!

Laura: Okay, is Indiana Jones in these books? No.

Eric: If it’s a love…

Kevin: No, but, but, Eric…

[Laura laughs]

Kevin: Your chain of thought is flawed in the fact that if you have a door, it is meant to be opened and, therefore, you can view it – view what’s inside the room.

Eric: If you have the right equipment on.

Kevin: If they could not see – if they could not open that door without being blown away then they would put it in a box that couldn’t be opened. Period.

Eric: Well, obviously, like Pandora’s Box, but anyway…

Laura: Well, what I’m saying is, a Death Chamber was easily accessible, but a Love Room isn’t?

[Everyone laughs]

Kevin: See, that’s…

Ben: But it’s like, you can’t really bottle hate.

Laura: [laughs] I feel so bad calling it the “Love Room.”

Andrew: Dumbeldore always emphasizes the power of Lily’s love for him.

Laura: Exactly.

Andrew: So, okay. So if love has a lot of power…

Eric: Certain people could open that door.

Andrew: …maybe it just shouldn’t be opened. Maybe there’s…

Eric: No, certain people could open that door. But, do you guys agree with me? If Voldemort opened the love door, would he not get blown away? Would he be able to walk into the Love Room?

Ben: I don’t think he could open the love door.

Eric: You don’t think anybody can? Why is it that people are studying it? Dumbledore said it was being studied.


The Effect of the Love Room


Laura: Something that I noticed was that no one else really seemed to be affected by the love door, but Ron was. It said that he was – let me look here.

Eric: Ron?

Laura: Yeah, Ron was. I put it in here somewhere, hang on. It says Ron “looked at it with a mixture of longing and apprehension which no one else seemed to feel.” So, why was it that Ron – he kept saying stuff like, “are you sure we shouldn’t look in there? Are you sure we shouldn’t try?” or whatever. And no one else really seemed to have – it didn’t have that effect on everyone. It was kind of…

Eric: Maybe it’s…

Laura: It was almost similar to the effect that the Veil had on Harry, Ginny, Luna, and Neville.

Eric: Maybe the Love Room is actually the room of brotherly love and nobody has as many brothers as Ron.

Andrew and Kevin: No. [both laugh]

Eric: Except Ginny.

Andrew: Bad.

Laura: Ummm…

Andrew: Bad.

Eric: Maybe he wants Percy back. Maybe Percy’s on the other side.

Laura: No, maybe Hermione was just right next to him in the room.

Eric: That’s where Percy is all of Book Six!

Andrew: This isn’t getting anywhere, so let’s move on.


Who Can Open The Door?


Laura: No, but what I was saying was, Eric mentioned maybe specific people being able to open the door.

Eric: I don’t mean specific people, necessarily, but, like, the trained Unspeakable…

Laura: But what if, for instance…

Eric: …who are in the Department of Mysteries, who are the aficionados for opening that kind of door, viewing that kind of thing, and studying it.

Laura: Okay.

Eric: Like, you need to have a safe environment for work.

Laura: Well, I’m sure, but for instance, it just strikes me as kind of funny that Harry couldn’t open this door that possesses the same kind of power as he does. Now, you brought up certain people being able to open it and Ron didn’t actually try, so what if he could? What if that was, like, explains the attraction that he felt towards it because he would somehow be able to open it.

Ben: [sings] “Close the door…”

Eric: Even if he would be able to open it, I’m pretty sure it would have burned off the faces of everybody else who wasn’t qualified to open it.

[Kevin laughs]

Eric: I’m dead serious.

Laura: Okay, I’m pretty sure this isn’t Raiders of the Lost Ark.

Eric: Okay, but…

Kevin: I’m pretty sure that’s not the case.

Eric: But Harry put his…what…Sirius’ key thing…key changer…lock changer…knife…

Andrew: Knife.

Laura: The knife.

Eric: …into the door and it melted. So there’s only one key for that. I think it’s not necessarily even who can open the door.

Laura: Okay…

Andrew: Maybe someone was… [laughs] Hey, guys, maybe someone was cooking something up in there, if you know what I’m saying?

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Because it melted. It’s pretty hot.

Eric: Cooking up some love.

Laura: [laughs] That was kind of creepy.

Andrew: Cooking up some love, yeah?

Eric: The ‘shippers. Hey, I wonder how many fanfics have taken place in the Love Room.

Laura: How many what?

Eric: No, they originate in the Lust Room, never mind. Fanfiction.

Ben: [laughs] The Lust Room.

[Andrew laughs]

Kevin: Oh god.

Laura: Oh my god…

Ben: But at the same time it’s like death. There’s a Death Room. When you open it up, you’re not going to – or if there’s a Hate Room.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: There’s a room devoted to death, where you go after…

Ben: It isn’t like you can bottle hate, I mean.

Andrew: Right.

Ben: You can bottle potions.

Eric: You can bottle fame, brew glory…


Prophecies


Andrew: [laughs] So, about those prophecies.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: 2007.

Andrew: …dot org.

Laura: That was a really crappy entrance. [laughs]

Eric: No, I like that.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: I think that’s the best transition we’ve ever had.

Laura: Okay. We’ve talked about prophecies at length on the show before so I don’t really think we should focus on them for too long. But does anyone think that any other prophecy, aside from Harry’s, is going to play a role in Book Seven?

Ben: Yes. There’s one prophecy where it has an old woman – or an old man and a woman who says, “The solstice will come anew”.

Laura: Those were actually two different prophecies.

Ben: Okay. Two different prophecies, then. “The solstice will come anew,” and “none will come after.” Those two prophecies, like those two lines, were italicized.

Laura: Yeah. They were definitely emphasized. I think they were important.

Eric: Oh! Which lines are these? I missed these.

Laura: You missed something, Eric?

Kevin: Uh-oh.

Eric: No, I didn’t. I didn’t but I’ve been out of the room for a couple episodes so I’m kind of like – what was the second prophecy? That the new will come anew and the new will be not new?

Laura: There was – whenever they smashed some of the prophecies to escape, Harry specifically heard…

Eric: This wasn’t part of the original prophecy. The “none can live when the other survives.”

Laura: No.

Andrew: No. This is a separate prophecy. This is when they were in the Hall of Prophecies.

Laura: You remember when they were stupefying everything to escape, or reducto, whatever they were using?

Andrew: One fell and it opened and it said, “Solstice anew…”

Laura: It said, “At the solstice will come anew.” And then another one broke and then it was a woman saying, “and none will come after.”

Eric: Oh, no. That’s a joke. Because at the solstice…

Laura: What?

Eric: …there came a new. The fifth Harry Potter book came at the solstice. June 21, 2003.

Laura: Okay, but…

Andrew: It’s kind of funny, actually.

Ben: Yeah. I actually freaked out about that. I e-mailed Emerson.

Eric: It’s Book Five that it even says it in. That’s a joke about the book itself.

Laura: I don’t think so.

Eric: That’s an inside joke.

Andrew: [laughs] No, it’s not an inside joke.

Ben: Yeah. Jo’s slapping her knee about that one.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah.

Eric: And there will be seven… And there will be seven and none will come after.

[Andrew laughs]

Laura: What are you – okay, Eric. You are one of the…

Andrew: Well actually, that’s kind of interesting. [laughs]

Laura: Eric, you are one of the biggest… Oh my god.

Eric: That’s a Crackpot Theory.

Andrew: Maybe it’s a little Easter egg she left for us.

Eric: A little Easter egg.

Andrew: A little Easter egg.

Eric: Jo does those.

Andrew: Happy Easter!

Eric: I can buy that.


Repercussion For Breaking Prophecies


Laura: Do you guys think – speaking of smashing prophecies – do you think there are any possible repercussions of them breaking all those prophecies? Are those the only records that are left?

Eric: No.

Kevin: No, because I would assume that they were all cataloged, right? They said that they were in, like, an organized system.

Laura: Well…

Eric: Well, actually…

Laura: Yeah, that’s what it was.

Andrew: Right.

Laura: They broke them.

Kevin: So, assuming they’re cataloged, then you would assume that there was some sort of record as to what they said.

Eric: Then again. But, no. No, no, no, no, no. You can’t record.

Andrew: It says in Order of the Phoenix that those were just for the record, or what does it say, Laura?

Eric: But you can’t record what was said..

Laura: Well, those are for the – yeah. Those are only for the record of the Department of Mysteries.

Andrew: Right.

Laura: And the only other people that know what was said were the people who were present and the people who said them.

Eric: Right. Because the Ministry can…

Laura: So, if those people are dead, then that prophecy’s lost.

Andrew: Oooh, I thought…

Kevin: Yep. You’re right.

Eric: Yeah, it is, because the Ministry themselves can’t even hear the prophecies they’re keeping. so I don’t think that there are that many…

Andrew: Are you sure they’re not logged somewhere else?

Laura: This isn’t MuggleNet. No. [laughs] They’re not logged somewhere else. [laughs] What would be the point? I mean, prophecies have…

Andrew: A book.

Laura: No, they have to be protected, though. Especially ones like Harry’s.

Eric: Yeah, but I don’t think there’s any repercussions.

Laura: You can’t just have multiple prophecies lying around; multiple records of them for people to just run across.

Eric: Well, the only people…

Andrew: No, I know that but I thought, maybe I’m getting it confused with what you said.


How Are The Prophecies Catalogued?


Eric: Guys, the only people that can hear retrieve the prophecy from those little glass balls, the spheres, where the people that it was made about or whatever.

Andrew: Right. Yes.

Eric: So, the Ministry, even though they’re cataloging, like, who can open each ball or hear something from it, however – we don’t even know how that’s done – extracting the actual prophecy from the thing. I don’t think they are any repercussions for actually destroying them, considering how likely is it. And, you know, most of the prophecies don’t even come true, which is the other thing, and then the ones that do, like, how exactly do you arrange for an appointment inside the Department of Mysteries to hear your own prophecy? I think, you know, what are they for to begin with? What is the point of keeping that room of the Hall of Prophecies? What is that for, considering the Ministry can’t hear a darn thing that’s in them. And you can’t – it doesn’t seem to be very easy to go in and find out what it’s saying for yourself.

Andrew: It’s for the record, first of all.

Eric: For the record? They can’t even record what was recorded. What was said.

Andrew: It’s written on the prophecy or something, isn’t it?

Eric: They say something’s made to somebody else, you know? It’s made by Sybil, something something, Trelawney to Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore.

Andrew: Right.

Eric: And that’s all it says, but it doesn’t say what it is unless you smash it.

Andrew: Yes it does!

Eric: Unless you smash it…

Andrew: No.

Eric: …you cannot hear it unless you smash it. And even then you have to…

Laura: Well, that’s the only method we’ve seen.

Eric: No, but the only people who can remove the prophecy…

Andrew: Okay, in the book…

Eric: The only people who can remove the prophecy from the shelf are the people it was made about.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: But I wonder about the people who are storing it there. How’d they get it there? I don’t know.

Andrew: Okay. On the prophecy is says, and Ron saw it, too, “SPT to APWBD. Dark Lord and Harry Potter.”

Eric: Oh.

Laura: Yeah. That’s all it says. It doesn’t say the whole prophecy.

Andrew: Well, no.

Eric: Oh.

Andrew: Eric, Eric, Eric said it only just said who it’s from and to. So, take that, Eric.

Eric: Oh. No, okay, so…

Andrew: I just saved us 50 complaint e-mails.

[Ben laughs]

Eric: You’re welcome.

Kevin: Yeah, but you would assume that description came from the person who actually created the record of the prophecy.

Eric: Maybe they can touch it.

Kevin: Like Dumbledore said, “Hey, this is the prophecy concerning Dark Lord and Harry Potter. Store for me.”

Eric: And that… Well, maybe… Well, we know, thanks to… Well, Voldemort says the only people who are able to remove it from the shelf once it’s on there is the people it was made about, or to, or about, actually, people it concerns.

Andrew: “When he grabbed it, it felt as though it had been lying in the sun for hours, as though the glow of the light within was warming it.” Just a little tidbit there.

Eric: I’ve read that line in fanfiction many times. And, so, anyway…

Andrew: Okay. That’s uncalled for.

Eric: No, listen.

Andrew: This is a G-rated show.

[Kevin laughs]

Eric: You know, I guess since they know it about and you proved me wrong, Andrew, about that. Since they know what it regards, I guess the person who made the record of the prophecy is able to touch the prophecy and place it on the shelf. But, I don’t know. We don’t know anything about the storage of them except the only people that can remove it are the people it was made about, or recorded to have been made about, and that’s it. I would just hate to be the sound guy putting in that sound of smashing glass on the 10 million digital glass spheres that are going go off in the fifth movie.

Laura: What?

Andrew: [sighs] Well, that’s what they’re paid for, Eric, so I don’t think it should be much of a problem there.

Eric: Yeah, that is what they’re paid for. They make a hundred times more than what we’ll ever make.

Andrew: That’s right. That’s right.


Planet Room


Laura: Planets! Let’s take about planets. If you’ll remember Ron, Ginny, and Luna all ended up in a Planet Room.

Eric: Yeah. Do you think Pluto was a planet in that room? Did anybody see Pluto? Was Pluto mentioned? Because I’m interested in if JKR thinks Pluto’s a planet.

[Andrew laughs]

Laura: Well, no, no, no. You know what I thought was funny that Luna mentioned that she blew up Pluto, which I thought was kind of nerdily funny.

Andrew: Oh. That’s kind of ironic because it’s not a planet anymore.

Laura: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] So, anyway, what’s being studied in the Planet Room? Maybe the…

Eric: Uranus.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: Oh, that’s so funny! Not.

Eric: Thank you. Goodnight

Kevin: I mean, we know that the planets do have some, like the alignment of the planets…

Andrew: Right.

Kevin: …do have some effect on showing what’s to come. So, I would assume that they’re trying to study the positions and current state of things.

Laura: Yeah.

Eric: Kevin, can you explain the String Theory as it applies to Astronomy?

Kevin: No. I am not explaining the String Theory.

Eric: But it’s good. It’s good.

Kevin: Oh, yeah, it’s good, but it is not something to be explained on a Harry Potter podcast.

Eric: Right, right, right.

Ben: You don’t even understand it.

Eric: But I knew you could, so I thought I’d ask.

[Andrew laughs]

Eric: But Google or Wiki the String Theory, if you’re interested. Many people have speculated that the alignment of the planets has a lot to do with Earth itself and gravity and Earth turning and…

Kevin: Yeah. Its just concerning, essentially concerning, where gravity actually comes from, because gravity is a force, but what actually is a force? It’s just…

Eric: And what started it.

Ben: [impersonating Kevin] String Theory is a model of fundamental Physics, whose building blocks are one dimensional extended objects.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Ben: [laughs] So, whatever the hell that means.

Eric: No. Seriously, though, you know if Earth stopped turning we’d all go flying through the wall at approximately 100,000 kilometers per second.

Laura: Yes.

Andrew: That’d stink.

Eric: That would really stink. Time would go on, but…

Andrew: So, to me, a Planet Room in the Department of Mysteries. Like in Professor Trelawney’s class there’s always the question of, you know, “or the alignment of the planets, it foretells your future.” Maybe that’s what they’re studying.

Kevin: Yeah. That’s what I thought. Absolutely.

Eric: Yeah, but Firenze pretty much said that was crap.

Andrew: He did, but how accurate are their thoughts about all this? Because he was downplaying everything Trelawney was bringing up.

Eric: Yeah, well, Firenze himself said that the stars had been read wrongly by centaurs, too. So…

Andrew: Right.

Eric: …I don’t think anybody…

Andrew: So, nobody really knows.

Eric: It doesn’t seem like the Planet Room would do much good.

Kevin: Yeah, but…

Eric: Maybe it might.

Kevin: I mean it’s…

Andrew: Well, they’re trying.

Kevin: Yeah, of course.

Eric: Well, like…

Eric: It’s one thing that they may not ever understand but they’re trying to understand it.

Eric: These departments – and it’s interesting talking about these department – but I don’t know that we’ll ever get knowledge of what the Ministry wizards have learned from these planets, considering they’re kind of just there for show, in a way. But, you know…

Laura: Who would they show them to?

Eric: …it’s cool to have a Planet Room.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: Yeah, well it’s cool to see…

Laura: I don’t think they’re there for show.

Eric: It would be great to ask JK Rowling, “Hey, what have these scientists uncovered about planets in this room?” But it’s not written. You know, it’s not written. The room is there, but Jo couldn’t tell us about a meteor that’s actually coming towards us or anything like that, based on the studies of these wizards. What I’m saying is, this room is… But we wouldn’t like…

[Kevin laughs]

Eric: We could hear theories on what’s in the love room. But beyond that, you know. She wrote it. And it’s a matter of, yes, there’s a planet room, but does that mean that they actually know stuff, and that that’s going to come into play in the books?


Seven Doors Remain


Laura: Yeah, okay, speaking of rooms, I thought it was interesting, because as I was rereading these chapters, I noticed that there are obviously twelve doors in the circular room, and they went through five of them…

Eric: Oh my god.

Laura: Which leaves guess how many that we don’t know about?

Andrew: Six.

Laura: Seven.

Eric: Seven.

Laura: That wonderful…

Eric: Yeah. Twelve minus five is six, and Andrew’s shrinking into the woodwork.

Laura: Seven. So, what I thought was kind of interesting though, and it’s not really important, I guess, but all of the rooms that they were in were kind of connected. Like, the brain room led directly into the Death Chamber.

Eric: You think about death.

Laura: Yeah, the Time room led into the Hall of Prophecy. And the planet Room must have also been accessible from the Hall of Prophecy, because Ron, Ginny and Luna ran in the opposite direction of Harry, Hermione and Neville.

Eric: To me, it makes sense for time and space…

Laura: Well, exactly.

Eric: …to lead to death.

Laura: Well, what I’m saying is, it’s all kind of connected the way every aspect of your life is connected.

Eric: So, are we to assume that those twelve doors and twelve rooms…

Laura: …are all connected.

Eric: Presumably are the twelve aspects of life? As we know it?

Laura: Well, not necessarily the aspects of life.

Ben: Oh yeah, planets are an aspect of life.

Eric: Well, love and death, love and death, and space and time. Time, space, love, death. How many more are there?

Laura: But I mean, obviously we didn’t see everything that the Department of Mysteries had to show. And there are obviously seven doors left. Do you think we’re going to find out what’s behind them?

Kevin: I don’t think so.

Laura: How Harry’s going to kill Voldemort? [laughs]

Eric: How Harry knows where Godric’s Hollow is.

Kevin: The Voldemort Room.

[Laura laughs]

Eric: Yeah, hey, there should be tyrannical…

Kevin: Like the remains of his previous bodies.

Eric: Or the Darkness Room.

Laura: Well, we can assume that one of those doors leads directly into the Planet Room, which would take us down to six.

Eric: That’s true.

Laura: Just… I don’t know. I’m… You guys all know that.

Kevin: I think that she touched on the rooms that she wanted to describe.

Eric: Yeah, that’s exactly what I was saying about the planets.

Kevin: And although we may see them in passing, I don’t think they’re going to play a huge role in the events.

Laura: See, I don’t know, you guys.

Andrew: Maybe there’s a Break Room…

Laura: Funny.

Eric: You kind of missed the point, where JK can just go…

Kevin: Were you thinking that she’s going to…

Andrew: A bathroom! You’ve got to have a bathroom down there.

Laura: Yeah, that is a big part of life, isn’t it?

Andrew [laughs] Yeah.

Eric: You know they call the toilet the Think Tank.

[Everyone laughs]

Eric: Maybe that’s what scarred Ron. It was the… Never mind.

Laura: Ugh, no. Let’s not go there. I don’t know, you guys know how I feel about the Department of Mysteries.

Andrew: The Love Room.


Harry’s Return to the Department of Mysteries


Laura: [laughs] You guys know how I feel about the Department of Mysteries.

Andrew: I don’t know, how do you feel?

Laura: Shut up! I’ve been stressing it since last year that I think that Harry’s…

Andrew: Okay, sorry, new listeners, you don’t get to know how Laura feels because she can’t be bothered to explain.

Laura: Okay, I am explaining, Andrew Sims.

Andrew: Sorry, listeners. We’re just suppose to all guess, because we’re all new listeners. It’s okay Laura, don’t worry
about it.

Eric: To be fair to Laura, Andrew. To be fair to Laura…

Laura: [laughs] No, as I was about to explain before I was so rudely interrupted by this New Jersey kid.

[Andrew laughs]

Laura: I think the Department of Mysteries is extremely important and I think that Harry’s going to go back and learn a lot about it. I’ve said it multiple times. I think we’re…

Eric: How’s he going to get in?

Laura: Well…

Eric: They wanted him to be the spokesman…

Laura: What the hell. [laughs] He already got in once before.

Kevin: No, it’s not only that, Eric. I think that the Ministry’s going to treat Harry slightly differently now that they know that Voldemort is back.

Laura: Yeah, exactly.

Kevin: For sure.

Eric: I think people inside the Ministry …

Andrew: I don’t know if that still gives him a reason to go into the Department of Mysteries, though.

Kevin: I think if he wants to see the Department of Mysteries, all he has to do is walk right up to it and go, “Hey, I need to see in there, because it pertains to Voldemort.”

Eric: I don’t think Scrimgeour’s going to let him in.

Andrew: Yeah, I don’t…

Kevin: I see him having pretty much free reign.

Laura: Yeah. I think that Harry’s…

Eric: Well, if he…

Andrew: No. No.

Laura: I seriously think that Harry’s – I think that Harry’s battle with the Ministry is over.

Kevin: I do too.

Laura: I really think it is.

Eric: Well, still, there will be politicians that hate him, like Lucius Malfoy and Rufus Scrimgeour.

Andrew: Of course, but they don’t have any power.

Eric: I think the general people will – and if they see him coming into work, even if it is to go to the Department of Mysteries, him being there at the Ministry is kind of doing what the Ministry wants of Harry anyway.

Laura: Exactly.

Andrew: Well, yeah, but I think the only reason they would let him in is because they know he could raise a fuss and get something printed in the Daily Prophet, maybe, or something like that.

Eric: Which is true.

Kevin: He has a lot of power. Essentially.

Eric: He does.

Kevin: Over …

Eric: The political state of things.

Laura: Harry has tons of power over the Ministry now.

Eric: Oh, that’s interesting. The power that he now has not based on how he has matured as a wizard but just how he is viewed in society – that power has grown dramatically since Voldemort’s been back.

Laura: Well, yeah.

Kevin: Right.

Laura: Because he’s the only one that can kill Voldemort.

Eric: No, well, yeah, but Andrew said that. If Harry says something in the paper, not that the paper prints anything because the Ministry leans on it, but that’s okay.

Andrew: Go back to the Quibbler.

Laura: Yeah, but as you’ll remember…

Eric: Yeah, oh, well exactly.

Laura: …The Daily Prophet started printing articles about the truth at the end of Order of the Phoenix.

Andrew: Yes.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: What do you mean, the one that said Voldemort is back?

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Well, of course they had to. Well, they sort of had to.

Laura: Yeah, but see now, now everyone has to listen to Harry because they looked like complete idiots.

Andrew: That’s true.

Eric: And nobody wants to look like an idiot. I feel like debating something.

Kevin: I feel like leaving.

Andrew: Kevin has to go everyone, so everyone say bye to Kevin.

Laura: Bye Kevin!

Eric: Bye Kevin!

Kevin: Good bye, everyone.

Andrew: Oh no, but wait a second, letting him back into the Department of Mysteries, I don’t think they will. Because, he would have to provide a valid excuse.

Laura: I don’t think it matters. I think that whether they let him in or not, I think he’s going to go. I think that he’d break in if that’s what it took.

Eric: I think he can go. I think he’d be able to go. I think he should go. I think that people will let him in if they see him, but I don’t – I hope Harry becomes the kind of person that cares a lot about studying what’s in that room. He might bring Hermione in with him. He might ask…

Laura: No.

Eric: I don’t know, do you think Harry could actually talk face to face with the people – the Unspeakables who are actually in the Department of Mysteries? Maybe they’ll be slightly more speakable about what they’ve learned?


Was Lily an Unspeakable?


Laura: I don’t know. I still kind of wonder if Lily was an Unspeakable. There’s really no support behind that, but it would be interesting.

Eric: Well, because nobody’s talking about it.

Andrew: And because there’s not much reason.

Eric: Yes, that was a joke.

Laura: Yeah, there’s no reason behind it, but I think it would make sense, just because Jo said that one of them would have to have a high paying career. And she said that their employment was kind of important.

Eric: I don’t know, maybe it was James…

Laura: I don’t think so.

Eric: And he went back in time and gave himself a penny in the time room or he gave himself a Knut and he then he went back in time and got the Knut and gave himself a Knut and got the Knut and that’s how Harry has the fortune.

Andrew: So, I think that wraps up our discussion on the Department of Mysteries.

Laura: Yeah, it was a good, three-piece…

Andrew: Thing.

Laura: …thing. [laughs]

Andrew: Thinger.

Eric: Three-piece suit.

Andrew: Laura, you’ve been wanting to talk about it for a while.

Ben: What’s next, Laura, Laura, what’s next?

Laura: What do you mean, what’s next?

Andrew: For discussion. I like this series thing.

Laura: In case… I don’t know, should we do series? Series discussions?


Listener Rebuttal – Laura Mallory


Andrew: Well, sometimes, not all the time. We have a couple emails now, couple more e-mails. Christina, 16, of Canada writes: “Hey MuggleCasters, this rebuttal’s for Jamie. On episode 59…”

Ben: Oh good, he’s not even here.

Andrew: I know. [laughs]

“On episode 59, he said that people are curious about the things that they hate. Sorry, Jamie, but there is living proof that what he said is not true. She lives in Georgia. If people are really curious about things they hate, then why doesn’t Mrs. Mallory pick up a Harry Potter book and actually read it?”

Whoa, snap, Christina. Mmmm, girl.

Laura: I don’t think so. Okay, because the truth about Laura Mallory is she has picked up a Harry Potter book. She has skimmed them, but she hasn’t actually read them. She was curious enough about them to actually open them up and look at them. I think that people are curious about the things they hate. How many times…

Eric: I think people are afraid of things they hate.

Laura: Okay. I’m going to and it’s true…

Andrew: When’s the next hearing, Laura?

Laura: I don’t know, they haven’t scheduled it. But for instance, you know…

Andrew: Okay, we’re done talking about Laura Mallory.

Laura: That every… No!

Andrew: It was a quick email I wanted to read.

Laura: No, okay, what I’m saying is that every single person who listens to the show, for instance, has gone out and searched for a person that they hate on MySpace, because they’re curious about what that person’s MySpace looks like.

Ben: You know what’s a good idea?

Eric: I think…

Ben: I think if Laura Mallory stirs up any more trouble or stuff, what we’re going to do, is
give out her phone number and encourage every single visitor to call her.


MuggleCast Dating Service


Andrew: Ooh. That would be pretty good. I like that idea. I finally have a MuggleCast Dating Service update. Finally got one. We put these two together and we’re really happy about it. Actually, I’m completely making that up. I haven’t put any two together. It’s a very messy business, trying to put people together. But, we got this email the other day…

Ben: Don’t you think the MuggleCast Dating Service is responsible for John Noe and Kelly, don’t you feel so?

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Oh, actually, I would agree with that statement, yes. We got this email the other day from Chris, 15 from Arkansas. He writes about his dating service success story. So.

“I didn’t use the actual dating service, but I just got my first girlfriend in five years, because she was listening to her iPod when she came outside as I was playing basketball. I asked her what she was listening to, and she said… MuggleCast.”

Laura: PotterCast.

Andrew: No. MuggleCast.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: “That was when we clicked, and started talking about Harry Potter, among other things like football, baseball, cross country. She’s a runner. She’s the first person I’ve met in my town that listens to MuggleCast, and she’s smoking hot [laughs] too. I’ve finally found someone that’s smart – not quite as smart as me, but it will work.

[Ben laughs]

Laura: Whoa!

Andrew: “I have a 4.2, she has a 3.8.”

Laura: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!. That’s terrible!

Eric: Whoa. Whoa! How do you compare your girl’s intelligence to yours?

Andrew: Okay. Let’s keep going. Let’s keep going here. Let’s keep going here. Let’s keep going.

“As for personality, we talk on the phone for hours without – we talk on the phone for end.

No!

“We talk on the phone for…”

Laura: Hours on end.

Andrew: “…hours on end. We talk on the phone for hours on end without boredom. She’s athletic, so I’m okay in that department, as I said she runs cross country and I play baseball for my high school team, and is beautiful.”

Now, wait a second. Doesn’t smoking hot and beautiful – never mind.

“That combination is nearly impossible to come across in high school. I’m about the only person that is a geek and jock at the same time, so it’s very nice to have someone like that move in next door, because everyone is either one extreme or the other, but, but, but her landlord was being a bully and called the new landlord and got her kicked out, so now she’s going to a different school, but it’s all right.”

So there you go, guys. Next time you see someone random in the hallway, ask them what they’re listening to because it could, very well, be MuggleCast.

Eric: It must have been.. It must have been that 3.8 grade point average that got her kicked out of school.

[Ben laughs]

Laura: Yeah, I wouldn’t…

Eric: He’s got a 4.2, so he’s safe.

Laura: Advice to guys out there, don’t say you’re smarter than your girlfriends. It’s not a good idea.

Eric: Yeah, she listens to MuggleCast, dude. It’s not like she wouldn’t find out.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: Yeah, so e-mail us next week and let us know how the breakup goes.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs] Okay, there’s your success story.

Laura: MuggleCast breakups.

Ben: Break up with him, okay? You hear me? What’s her name? Do you know her name? Did he say her name?

Andrew: No. I knew it, but it was on her MySpace.

Ben: Well, anyway, you know what? Break up with him. You are too good for him, okay? He obviously does not appreciate you.

Eric: Yeah, he may be a jock and a geek at the same time, but do you really want both ends of the spectrum.

Andrew: I think it’s terrible you guys are talking him out of it, and I don’t appreciate that kind of attitude you guys are sharing here on the show.

Eric: Sorry.

Andrew: And we’re going to have a talk after – we haven’t finished recording.

Ben: Unhappy with what?

Andrew: The attitude you’re bringing to the show. I don’t appreciate it.

Eric: Because we have such an excellent track record with this whole dating service.

Andrew: Yeah [Laughs]


Debate: Decree For The Restriction of Underage Wizardry


Andrew: Okay, so anyway, guys, it’s time that we have another debate.

Ben: Another debate.

Andrew: We did one of these – We did one of these a few weeks ago.

Eric: That’s debatable, Andrew.

[Andrew laughs and rings bell]

Andrew: We did one of these a few weeks ago, and we got a lot of great feedback about it, and then we didn’t do another one. We had planned to, but we just didn’t, so we’re doing another one now. Go ahead, Ben.

Ben: I’ll take over here. Okay. Reminder. Quick reminder about the format. Each side, the affirmative and the negative, or the pro and the con, each gets two minutes to present their case over the topic, and this week’s topic is: In times of war, the Wizarding world should lift the Decree For the Restriction of Underage Wizardry. Okay? On…

Eric: I would like to go first…

[Laura laughs]

Ben: Andrew and Laura are saying they should not lift the restriction, and Eric is on his own side, he’s bidding by himself. So if he pulls this out, it’s a miracle, folks, because…

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: …he has one mind working against two.

Laura: I think either way, Andrew and I look really bad.

Andrew: Yeah. [Laughs]

Ben: So, just a reminder here: We have two minutes – each side gets two minutes to present their case, then there will be about five minutes of discussion, then they each get a minute to sum up their position.

Andrew: I just want to say something first. The one big piece of feedback we got about this segment was that it sounds like we’re yelling at each other. We don’t – it sounds like we don’t like each other.

Laura: That’s debate.

Andrew: Yeah, we don’t actually. If it sounds like we’re getting angry with each other – which we shouldn’t…

Laura: Well…

Ben: We’re just passionate about what we do, okay? That’s all it is.

Andrew: Right. We still love each other. It’s – don’t take it seriously.

Ben: And one other thing. One other thing you should remember: there will be a poll on MuggleCast.com; vote for who you think the winners are. My vote – I’ll decide who I think won at the end of the debate – my vote counts for 25 percent of the vote, but remember do not side with me just because I’m Ben Schoen. Vote for whoever you think won, okay?

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Ben: No, seriously. Last week, last time, there were some people who were angry because they thought that the only reason Jamie and I won was because Andrew voted for us.

Laura: Okay.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Ben: Which was obviously not true because we stomped them.

Laura: Oh, yes.

Ben: So vote for, honestly, whoever you think won.

Andrew: We never said that on the last – we never said – announced on the show who won the last time. It was Jamie and Ben.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: You me and Jamie.

Laura: Laura and Eric.

Andrew: By popular vote, too, so it wasn’t even…

Ben: We got about a two-thirds of the vote – the fan vote – plus Andrew’s 25 percent, so yeah. We won. Okay so now lets get things started. Andrew and Laura. No, actually, hold on a second. Actually, the affirmative has to start first.

Eric: They should lift it. First of all, my main problem with it – the Decree of Underage Wizardry – is that it’s crap. It’s complete, complete crap. Even when not in war, they should completely abolish this rule, this law. It does nothing. It does absolutely nothing but protect people or rather, hurt the people that don’t deserve it. Harry didn’t even use the Hover Charm that Dobby did, and he got slagged for it, and it was held against him in the large Wizengamot trials later on when it was just complete crap. Harry didn’t do a charm in his house, but just because he doesn’t happen to live with magical relatives under their house, he gets all this flak for magic being done in his house in front of Muggles. Anybody who’s anybody could walk in to his house and do magic, and he would get in trouble for it, and I don’t think that’s fair at all. Now, on the other hand, if you live in a Wizarding home like the Weasleys, you can play Quidditch every other weekend out in your back yard with poles and brooms and you can have such a more fruitful life, rather, living with magic. I really feel bad for people who don’t live in wizarding houses, because they have to figure everything out once they get to Hogwarts, whereas the Wizarding community, you know, oh, it’s the parents’ responsibility to make sure the kids don’t do anything. Yeah, bull crap. The parents will be teaching their kids everything they know, just like that’s how regular parenting takes place. So, my final reasons for the Restriction Of Underage Wizardry being lifted is that in times of war, especially, it will be very hard to track everything – hang on. Are you guys still on? Okay, because somebody jumped out. All right. In times of Wizarding war it would be even harder to track that kind of thing. Who’s going to be in whose houses? Everyone is going to be hiding. It doesn’t work to begin with, it’s a flawed system; just leave it as it is, and that’s pretty much it. Just leave it. It’s absolute crap and it punishes the wrong people for the wrong reasons, and now that it’s wartime, you just got to get rid of it.

Ben: Okay. Now, the negative, you have two minutes to respond.

Laura: There are concrete reasons as to why the Ban on Underage Wizardry shouldn’t be lifted, and the first of which is that it can seriously compromise the ability to detect other illegal magic going on. Say if the Ministry is trying to keep tabs on what all is going on magically, 1,000 underage wizards casting spells to their heart’s content could clog the system, as it were, making Ministry and Order response much less effective. Eric mentioned that child safety should be considered, and he’s right. However, I think it’s important to remind ourselves that students are already allowed to defend themselves. The Decree for the Restriction of Underage Wizardry specifies that underage wizards are allowed to use magic in cases where defense is required, not to mention, if you’re having a bunch of untrained wizards running around casting magic spells that they don’t quite know how to use, you can end up causing a lot more harm, because people could get hurt.

Andrew: Eric’s only real point there is that it’s crap that you would be able to – that you should keep it on because it just doesn’t make sense. If you were to remove this ban, it would be mayhem. That’s what it comes down to. It would just be mayhem.

Laura: Well, not to mention…

Andrew: Just think of the bad kids who would be able to go out and do some – cause some disaster in their local Muggle neighborhood, and they wouldn’t be able to get in trouble for that? I mean, under some rule they might. They might.

Laura: Well, I mean when you think about it, it’s not like the average student could defend themselves from a Death Eater or Voldemort himself, anyhow. So, isn’t it better to keep things the way they are in terms of students continuing their educations in a safe environment where magic is regulated?

Eric: Three, two, one.

Ben: Okay, now five minutes. Well, let’s say about… Yeah, until I say stop. Roughly five minutes of crossfire here.

Laura: All right, Eric, one of the first examples you cited was that children in Wizarding homes can perform magic. I don’t think that’s necessarily true. You, for instance, said that they can play Quidditch, well that isn’t necessarily performing magic when you play Quidditch. The objects themselves are magical. So, it’s not like, by the Weasley children playing Quidditch, they’re breaking the Decree for Underage Wizardry and not getting in trouble for it.

Eric: They’re certainly breaking, or infringing upon the Muggle protection act.

Laura: No, they’re not!

Andrew: How?

Eric: They’re making themselves seen by…

Laura: No, they’re not. They don’t live in a Muggle community.

Eric: Or visible. That’s true. But, but just things like that. I’m saying people who grow up in wizarding families can be so much more well-rounded, just because of their family and there’s no consequences as a result. I don’t think it’s a big deal too much though because I do agree with what you guys said about Muggle children being held accountable for going and turning their Muggle faces into goo, or something, next door, you know? But that’s a home problem, too, and that’s – I don’t necessarily know what the Ministry’s so afraid about as far as that goes. But what I’m saying is that even though you are allowed to use magic if you’re defending yourself, that’s way after they take you to court that any of that information is found out. You get a court sentence…

Laura: It doesn’t…

Eric: An owl through your window.

Laura: It doesn’t matter. You still don’t…

Eric: And so much..

Laura: You’re still not found guilty of it.

Eric: Right, but in the time of war, in a time of war so many people are going to be defending themselves. So many people who are younger and maybe even can’t do it, but they are going to be using magic..

Laura: Exactly, so…

Eric: And…

Laura: That’ll probably change a little bit.

Eric: Can you imagine the expense of owls that’ll be sent out if anybody wants to maintain this crap?

[Andrew laughs]

Laura: But Eric, because it’s – because its a time of war, those regulations are probably going to change.

Eric: Right, but so many of…

Laura: They’re not…they’re not going…

Eric: Instances.

Laura: To bring people to court for defending themselves against Dementors anymore. It’s not going to happen.

Eric: Well…

Laura: Because Harry’s already proven that Voldemort’s back and that people are going to have to do that.

Eric: So you’re kind of basically saying that the ban will be lifted anyway.

Laura: No, I’m not saying the ban will be lifted. I’m saying people aren’t going to be hauled to court every time they defend themselves. So, it’s not like we’re going to have…

Eric: Well, they’ll still be apparently breaking this restriction. So…

Laura: But they’re not…

Eric: If it’s kept in place.

Laura: They’re not breaking the restriction because they’re defending themselves and it’s already in the decree…

Eric: But who can prove that?

Laura: That they’re allowed to.

Eric: They needed a witness. Dumbledore needed to bring in Mrs. Figg to…

Laura: No, Harry’s trial…

Eric: To prove…

Laura: Eric…

Eric: To prove that they were defending themselves. What I’m saying is that so many people would be defending themselves. There are so many instances where people are going to – where underage wizards, more often than not, are going to be using magic to defend themselves. It is a complete waste of time.

Laura: Well, citing…

Andrew: Eric that’s…

Eric: Complete waste of time.

Andrew: That’s a terrible example.

Laura: Yeah. Citing Harry’s trial is…

Andrew: You reference the court trial. Umbridge admitted…

Laura: A really bad example.

Andrew: Umbridge admitted herself that she sent the Dementors after him so how could you say…

Laura: Yeah, it was the ministry trying to get Harry…

[Andrew laughs]

Laura: Into trouble.

Andrew: Right.

Laura: It’s not a good example.

Eric: Okay.

Laura: You can’t take Harry’s trial and say that’s going to be the average experience of every person who uses defensive magic, because it’s not.

Eric: No, in Year Two, he still got the owl through the… I mean, in many instances, or in many cases the owl worsened things for Harry, or it sure didn’t help. And the other thing, too, that I wanted to say about this is that I think once you – I don’t really like the idea that you’re not able to use magic when you get home from Hogwarts. I don’t necessarily agree with that. Now, that has to do with the underage wizard thing as well. There’s no way to refine your technique or do anything with magic unless you’re being schooled. And I can kind of see they want people to come out well-rounded and well – I just there’s a large unaccountability. Like for instance Tom Riddle, had he been living at a magic home, could have done far more evil and not gotten reprimanded for it when he was home from the holidays. Just because he lived in a magical institution. Now, he didn’t. It just so happens that he didn’t, but if he had…

Laura: So, you think we should lift the bans…

Eric: I’m saying people like Draco Malfoy-

Laura: So, that people like Draco…

Eric: No.

Laura: Could run around and cast terrible spells and even more mayhem?

Eric: No. I’m saying Draco can cast terrible magic spells-

Laura: Not as much as he…

Eric: As much as he wants to.

Laura: Not as much as he’d be able to-

Eric: As much as he wants to, yes, under his own roof, because Lucius is a respected member of society. His son can get away with doing so much.

Laura: But we’re not even talking about the past right now, we’re talking about the future, because they’re in the middle of a war. If Draco’s not even with his dad anymore it doesn’t matter because they’re going to know that. If they have detections of an underage wizard running around the British countryside performing magic, they’re going to know it.

Eric: Well, either way, they’re both of age now, or they will both be of age soon. Draco and Harry. But it’s just a matter – I really think it’s flawed. I really think that there should not be a repercussion considering it’s – they don’t even have to do magic to get flagged. If somebody else does magic in their home, like Dobby, or something, it just – you’re blamed for something you didn’t do.

Andrew: I want to know how it’s flawed because there is, like Laura brought up in her opening thing, you are allowed to use magic if it is for defensive purposes, like against a Dementor. So how do you think – how is it flawed?

Eric: Okay. Dobby uses hover charm, Harry gets sentenced, or he gets a warning, an official warning, that if he later gets warnings will bring him to court.

Andrew: Yeah, okay.

Eric: That’s a flaw.

Andrew: How is that flawed? I don’t – I’m not following you.

Eric: He didn’t do the magic – he didn’t do the crime, but he’s going to do the time.

Andrew: But he didn’t.

Eric: That in itself is flawed.

Laura: He didn’t do any time for it.

Andrew: Yeah.

Eric: No, he didn’t that time, but how many more times would Dobby have had to go in and use a charm and he would get slammed. I’m saying first of all, you’re saying it’s okay because he didn’t do the time, that he’s still getting officially labeled as that? Officially – it’s on his official record.

Andrew: Yes, because him a warning it’s not like they automatically flipped out on him and said “That’s it.”

Eric: No, but they had the record that he was being warned. They had the record that he was warned. It made him look bad.

Laura: The thing is Eric..

Eric: And, of course, they’re trying to prove he was looking bad.

Laura: Eric. It was a rare situation. Again, using Harry as an example here isn’t the best way to defend yourself because… Oh, no, because…

Eric: Okay, but Harry’s all we have.

Laura: All sorts of unusual events happen to Harry, not every Muggle-born or Muggle-raised child is going to have a house-elf in their house performing magic. It’s not going to happen.

Eric: Which is true. Which is true.

Laura: So, there are obvious exceptions to the way systems work. It’s how it happens, but-

Eric: Well, clearly the idea that a parent of a wizarding child will be responsible enough to prevent their kid from doing harmful magic to Muggles is a completely flawed idea.

Ben: Okay, that wraps up that.

Laura: The point is… Okay…

Ben: That wraps up our little cross-fire section there. Yeah, so Laura and Andrew, you have one minute to tell me why they should not – why in times of war they should not lift the ban.

Andrew: It would just be a huge mistake. There would be mayhem on the streets. Who knows, maybe someone, a wizard, could make a mistake in casting a spell on someone, because, you know, everyone’s on edge. So maybe they’ll see someone and be like, “Ahhh, Avada Kedavra!” Okay, maybe not that bad, but…

Laura: Well, just like in times of war in our world, do we say it’s okay for underage children to run around with guns? I mean it’s in – just for instance whenever you’re learning to drive, just because, you know, you made need to go to the store by yourself, or because your parents aren’t home, it doesn’t mean you can drive by yourself if you haven’t been certified. So, these underage people who are learning how to use magic, and they haven’t refined their technique yet, they obviously can’t run around using magic unmonitored, and the only place that the Ministry has a common ground on monitoring that magic is at Hogwarts. So, they shouldn’t be able to perform it outside of school.

Andrew: And this is all assuming that during this war that there are going to be random attacks on people. But even if there is that’s where you are allowed to defend yourself.

Ben: Eric, tell me why they should lift the decree.

Eric: I think on principle, it’s a decent idea that you have to restrict kids who are obviously not in a closed environment supervised by an elder to use magic, and that in itself is a good idea, but I don’t personally think that it works the same ways that it should. It prevents magic from being done in front of Muggles, maybe, but at the same time you could still bring Muggles to a wizarding household and perform all sorts of crap on them. Especially, if you are a Pure-Blood wizard who hates Muggles, you could do so many things to Muggles and there would be no way of detecting it. Almost. I’m trying to think that maybe there’s something in the Ministry that goes along with this that allows somebody to tell what charm was used such as the Hover Charm. So, there’s some way of maybe flagging houses, or detecting what kind of magic is used in a particular instance. So, maybe in the war, even if a Muggle accidentally, or is hit by an inexperienced wizard, there might be some record of it. I’m just saying it shouldn’t be banned. People should not have to – not necessarily account for their actions, but I’m trying to think of a situation where they are actually, you know, trying to vandalize streets. When they’re running from Voldemort. I think during war time the – I think it’s very unlikely, not unlikely, but I think they’ve got bigger fish to fry than the little kids who are going to be running around the streets. You know? Nobody’s going to be running around. They’re going to be hiding in there houses, waiting for Voldemort.

Ben: Good. Good debate everybody. I’m very impressed. A few comments before I give my decision. Something that, Eric, you should have spent more time on in your first little spiel there was that it says “in times of war.” You spent a lot of time explaining why the Decree for the Restriction of Underage Wizardry was just bad to begin with but you should have spent saying, “Okay in times of war these people are going to be under threat, why should the Ministry have to worry about little kids casting spells when they could be being attacked.” Laura and Andrew, something that you should have mentioned more and especially in your last little thing was that whenever there’s a – whenever your life is being threatened it is okay for you to use it, so therefore it doesn’t matter if the decree is lifted because they can use it when they absolutely need to. But Eric, I know, I’m saying that you should have mentioned it in your last thing. But Eric something that you should have brought up like in response to that was not just about the hassles it’s going to bring on the Ministry – I like the thing you brought up about the owls – but that when parents aren’t around as much they may need magic to make their lives easier and perform everyday activities and not just against Death Eaters. You know what I’m saying? If that makes any sense. Yeah. Overall, I think it was good. I don’t know if this is going to be the popular decision here, but I’m going to have to vote with the affirmative or, Eric Scull.

[Andrew groans]

Laura: What?! You are such a tool!

Ben: Hold on, hold on.

Laura: You’re such a tool! [laughs]

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Hold on, no. Here’s why. Here’s why: He made a good point that you guys brought up, okay, that they should only be allowed to defend themselves when they’re “qualified” to defend themselves. And I think that’s a really good point that they should lift the Ban on Underage Wizardry just because of the hassle it’s going to cause, when there’s going to be more attacks, the Ministry’s forces are going to spread to begin with. So, they’re going to need absolutely everybody and they’re not going to need to be tracking underage magic because it’s too much of a hassle especially when these people are going to be attacked. And something else that he did mention in his last little spiel is that these people – these kids aren’t going to go out destroying streets just because they’re allowed to use magic, that it’s going to be used when they absolutely need to defend themselves. So, there you have it. Eric Scull wins in my opinion.

Andrew: All right. It’s up to the listeners now, to decide.

Ben: Yeah, it’s up to the listeners to decide. Remember…

Laura: It’s up to the listeners not to be delusional. Geez.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Okay, if you honestly think that Eric – I mean Andrew and Laura won the debate, please vote for them. Do not let my decision bear on yours, have any weight on yours at all. And something else that’s important to mention: Please don’t let this turn into a popularity contest about “Oh, I think Andrew’s the coolest host, so I’m going to vote for Andrew.” Don’t make it about that, make it about the arguments.

Eric: Or “Eric is funny, he talks too much” or anything like that.

Andrew: We already know I am the coolest host.

Eric: Oh, you are, yeah.

Ben: So, I’m just saying…

Eric: How pathetic are we, dude? Alphabetically, you’re number one.

Andrew: I have to start saying I’m just kidding after everything I say because then I get these emails about how big of a head I have. People don’t understand – I’m just doing it to be sarcastic.

Laura: Yeah. People in the comments – oh my, god, did you see them last week?

Andrew: Yeah. “You guys have big heads!” No, we don’t!

Laura: I think it was me, Micah, and Kevin were the only ones who weren’t egotistical now, or something. [laughs]

Andrew: Yeah. Listen: It’s a joke! We’re just kidding. When I act arrogant, like saying that “we already know I am the coolest host”. I’m just kidding! I don’t really mean that!

Laura: Yeah, he does.

Andrew: Well, yes, I do.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: But, the point is… [laughs] No, I’m serious. It’s just a joke, okay? Please don’t take it seriously. [still laughing] I’m just tired of hearing that.

[Laura laughs]


Show Close


Andrew: On that note, I think it is time we start saying goodbye.

Eric: Oh, wait! There’s something at the bottom of the Writely. What is this? It’s number nine. British joke.

Laura: Yeah, well, you’re not British.

Andrew: That when – that was back yesterday when we thought Jamie was going to be on, but..

Laura: Before we flipped the “Easy” button. [laughs]

Andrew: Oui, oui.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, guys. The decision of who would host this week came down to this little sound: [presses the “Easy” button]

Andrew: We had to flip the “Easy” button to decide would it be Laura coming on the show or Jamie coming on the show? Because it was either one or the other that we had to sacrifice and Jamie lost and landed on the uneasy side. The easy side sounds like this: [presses button again] So, there you go. That’s how we decide things here on MuggleCast. [laughs]

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Next time you need something decided just let me know, and I’ll flip the “Easy” button for you.

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: Andrew at staff. Anyway…

Ben: Anyway, the P.O. Box:

P.O. Box 223
Moundridge, KS 67107.

Send us anything – send us anything except Subway gift cards. Send those to Darfur, please. [laughs]

Andrew [Show close music in background]: You can also call the MuggleCast voicemail box: You can dial 1-218-20-MAGIC, and if you’re in the United Kingdom you can dial 020-8144-0677.

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: If in Australia, where we lost the award and will probably canceling that number because apparently nobody likes us down there –

[Ben laughs]

Ben: [in Australian accent] Down under, down under.

Andrew: You can call 02-8003-5668. You can also Skype the username “MuggleCast” to leave your voicemail question, comment, or concern.

Eric: If you’re an aspiring stalker and wish to view images of the…

Andrew: You can view our MySpace! Perfect transition! MySpace.com/MuggleCastFans. We also got the Facebook, we got the YouTube group, we got the Frappr group, we also have the fanlisting and forums. Please vote for us on Podcast Alley and show your support, and rate us on Yahoo! Podcasts.

Ben: Also, check out…

Andrew: Yeah, just want to say again, thanks to everyone for listening.

Ben: This is the Love Room right here.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: This is the Love Room. Something’s heating up!

Ben: [sings] The love shack is a little old place where we can get together! [laughs] Love shack baby!

Andrew: I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: [sings] Love shack! I’m Ben Schoen.

[Eric sings in background]

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Eric: And I am Eric Scull.

Andrew: Kevin?

Ben: [in Kevin’s voice] I’m Kevin Steck.

Andrew: Jamie?

Ben: [in British accent] I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Andrew: Micah?

Ben: [in Micah’s voice] I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: We’ll see everyone next week for Episode 61! Wooo!


Bloopers


Eric: You guys want something really messed up with time? I was born April 23rd EST at 12:11, right after midnight, but in about seven time zones in the world, I was born on April 22nd. And it was even like… Yeah. Yeah, so if you were to see my birthday…

Andrew: Wow. Wow.

Kevin: That’s like the people born on the extra day in a leap year. Technically they’re only four years old if you were born in 1986.

Eric: Well, no. It’s not even that random. Anybody born on the east coast within like the first six hours of the day, you know, it’s a different date somewhere else around the world. But I guess that’s true with any time of day. It’s pretty much…

Andrew: Whoa.

Laura: Yeah exactly. [laughs]

Kevin: Yeah, I guess.

Eric: Everyone has different birthdays.

Ben: If I was born at 11 PM…

Kevin: I think that extra day – I think being born on the extra day in a leap year – it just tops that, Eric. I’m sorry.

Ben: Eric, you’re just trying to make yourself feel unique.

Eric: Yeah. That’s it.

Ben: Like you have four birthdays or something.

[Kevin laughs]

Eric: But, but, but in the year 2000, my birthday was Easter Sunday and I thought I was the Prodigal Son or something. I was like all flipping out. It was really cool.

Ben: That you’re Jesus.

Kevin: [laughs] I knew you were going to say that. I knew it was coming.

[Everyone laughs]


Andrew: Guys, I have the answer! You know who gave it to me?

Laura: Bono?

Andrew: Bono.

Kevin: Oh geez.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Bono. I have an answer. It’s in a song called Mercy”.

Laura: [still laughing] How did he give it to you?

Andrew: “Love is where I lie. Love puts the blue back in my eye. Love has come again. I am gone again…”

Ben: Yeah, wonderful lyrics.

Eric: Are Bono’s eyes blue?

Andrew: Wait! But there’s more! “Love’s got to be with a wink. Only then love gets a chance to speak. Love will come again. I’ll be gone again. Again.”

Eric: So, how do you get love into a room?

Ben: I think Micah Tannenbaum is pure love.

[Kevin laughs]

Andrew: Wait there’s more! “Love is justice, a charity…”

Laura: Okay.

Ben: Okay!

Andrew: “Love brings with it a clarity!”

Eric: Ben, is that what you’re saying? We should lock Micah up in a room?

Ben: Micah Tannenbaum is love.

Andrew: [sings] “Love is justice, a charity…”

Laura: Okay. Here’s my point.

Andrew: [continues to sing] “Love brings with it clarity.”

Eric: Seriously, what the hell? Okay, Laura, you’re on to something.

Andrew: [continues to sing] “Love has come again.”

Laura: Andrew, shut up! Thank you.

Andrew: [continues to sing] “I’m alive again.”

Laura: Oh my gosh! Hush. Anyway, here’s what I’m saying, okay…

Kevin: [laughs] This is going to be good.

———————–

Written by: Micah, Adrienne, Allison, Amanda, Briana, Jessica, Judy, Mandie, Margaret, Martina, Megan, Samantha, Sarah, Shannon and Shelly

Transcript #59

MuggleCast 59 Transcript


Show Intro


Andrew [Show Intro with music in background]: Because JKR got bored on the train, thank you, Erin, Grace, and Sarah, this is MuggleCast Episode 59 for October 14th, 2006.

See why GoDaddy.com is the number one domain registrar worldwide. Now, with your domain name registration, you’ll get hosting, a free blog, complete email, and much more. Plus, as a MuggleCast listener enter the code “Ron,” that’s R-O-N, when you check out and get your dot com domain name for just $6.95 a year. Get your piece of the Internet today at GoDaddy.com!

Jamie: Because magic is a manifestation of the mind… [Jamie continues one of his V for Vendetta rants] And I’m Jamie Lawrence.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: I’m Andrew Sims.

Kevin: I’m Kevin Steck.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Jamie: And I’m tired after that.

Andrew: Who wrote that for you, Jamie? [laughs]

Jamie: That was…

Kevin: Wow, you did it the first time.

Jamie: Stephanie. That was Stephanie. Thank you, Stephanie.

Andrew: We’re back for another week of MuggleCast. No Ben this week, unfortunately. Eric’s…

Jamie: Sorry, did you say “unfortunately”?

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: I almost had you there, Andrew. I’m joking Ben. I love you, Ben.

Micah: I think Laura Mallory actually got to him.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Oh! [laughs]

Jamie: Literally, she got to him. Killed him, murdered him…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Yeah. Eric Scull, you know, New Zealand, California, Vegas…

Laura: New York…

Andrew: Wherever else he went.

Laura: …Chicago.

Andrew: New York…it wasn’t enough. He’s in Chicago this week.

Laura: I think you said Miami’s next, right? Andrew?

Kevin: Oh really?

Andrew: At this rate…

Jamie: What? He’s actually going this – now? As in after Chicago?

Laura: Yes, Jamie. Yes, he’s going to Miami.

Kevin: Yes, it’s a cross-country tour.

Jamie: I wouldn’t be surprised. I wouldn’t be surprised.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: [Laughs] I know!

Jamie: Considering he goes half way around the world every single week and then still comes back and works 18 hours a day.

Laura: Hey you know what? I think everybody should write to the MuggleCast e-mail, saying where they think Eric will go next.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: “Where’s Eric?”

Jamie: Get a free T-shirt if you guess the city, hotel, time, place, everything.

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah.

Kevin: It’s a twist on “Where’s Waldo?”

Laura: [laughs] Yeah, that’s what I was thinking.

Andrew: I have a feeling he’ll be done after the Chicago trip.

Jamie: But, Kevin, you can spot Eric really easily because he’d just be wearing his Hogwarts robes on the photos. [laughs]

Kevin: [laughs] That’s true!

Jamie: He would be easy to spot.

Andrew: Oh, speaking of Hogwarts robes, we got to talk about what we’re all going to be for Halloween, because I know what I’m going to be and all of you can probably guess. But, first…

Jamie: What, Bono?

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: No, not Bono. That’s a good idea! No, not Bono. But first, Micah Tannenbaum, you have the past week’s top Harry Potter news stories.


News


Micah: The Portuguese Harry Potter translator, Isabella Nunes, has reportedly confirmed in an interview with a Portuguese fan site that RAB does indeed stand for Regulus Arcturus Black. Apparently, before Book Six hit shelves, she contacted Jo about the character’s gender, and was told the full name as well as the gender.

Her reason for shedding light on the topic at this point is to “keep awake” the excitement for the seventh book. In the past, Nunes also clarified that Blaise Zabini is a man and Professor Sinistra is a woman.

Last month we told you about a new cover for Quidditch Through the Ages, included in the Harry Potter Schoolbooks Box Set along with Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. Now, the cover for the latter has emerged online. Both books benefit UK charity Comic Relief and can be purchased on Amazon.com. [mutters]Shameless plug.

In movie news, a recent breakthrough in film technology, developed by Image Metrics, allows a computer to map an actor’s performance onto any character: virtual or human, living or dead. The developers say it is far superior to standard hand-drawn computer graphics which are very costly and time-consuming. Warner Bros. will use this technology in the depiction of Grawp (played by Tony Maudsley) in Order of the Phoenix, which will surely bring Hagrid’s giant half-brother to life.

While in New York City for the premiere of his new film, Driving Lessons, Rupert Grint sat down for a chat with AM New York, where he discussed filming on Order of the Phoenix. He said they shot the Thestral scenes recently and that “it was really a good time because they had to make a mold, a specially made harness that goes under your legs, because in the film it has to be invisible. They put you on this crane and lifted you up in the air. That’s been my favorite scene so far.”

Speaking of the fifth film, the first theatrical teaser trailer for Order of the Phoenix will be released Friday, November 17th in front of the WB film Happy Feet.

And, additional information has emerged this week on Daniel Radcliffe’s appearance as Alan Strang in the London West End play, “Equus.” Apparently, 60 audience members will be seated on the stage itself with the rest in the stalls and circle. The play, written by Peter Shaffer, will run in the round for 16 weeks. Previews will begin on February 16th and the official opening is scheduled for the 27th. Rehearsals will commence January 3rd.

And, tied into a topic we mentioned on last week’s show, finally, the online hangout MySpace.com will organize 20 concerts featuring bands promoted on its site as part of a campaign to raise awareness and money for humanitarian relief in Sudan. We’ll have complete information on this in the show notes.

That’s all the news for this October 14th, 2006, edition of MuggleCast. Back to the show.


Halloween


Andrew: Okay, thank you Micah. Anyway, guys: Halloween. What are you all going to be for Halloween?

Laura: What am I going to be for Halloween, Andrew?

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: I’m going to be a Target employee.

Andrew: Oh!

Kevin: Oh!

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: Because that’s what I’m doing on Halloween.

Kevin: That sounds really interesting.

Laura: Yay me!

Andrew: What is that? A nice red polo shirt with a little Target logo on it?

Laura: Yeah, with my lame khaki pants.

Andrew: Khaki pants? [laughs]

Kevin: I was thinking a belligerent college student, what do you think?

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: You expect to walk around like that?

Andrew: I was expecting you to be Bill Gates, actually.

Kevin: [laughs] Yeah!

Jamie: I’m going to be boring. I’m going to stay in and I’m just going to dropkick people’s pumpkins when they ask me for trick or treats.

[Everyone laughs]

Kevin: Oh okay, so he’s going to be a…

Micah: You’re not going to steal their candy?

Jamie: No, I am. You know, you should learn that life is a complete disappointment early in life.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: You shouldn’t have to wait you’re like a teenager or older, so when they come around, I’m going to steal their candy, drop-kick their pumpkins, and tell them that if they ever come back here again, I’m going to sort them out.

[Everyone laugh]

Jamie: I’m sorting them out, you know

Andrew: Micah, what are you going to be for Halloween?

Micah: I don’t know. I don’t think I can top Jamie’s stealing candy from children.

Jamie: Just do the same, then.

Micah [laughs]: Just do the same?

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: Yeah. I would. Laura, that’s wrong when you say you can’t be too old for Halloween.

Laura: You’re never too old for Halloween.

Jamie: That’s not true!

Andrew: Well, no…

Jamie: If you’re 110, and you can’t move, you should not be dressing up as a vampire and going around for candy.

Laura: Excuse me, Jamie.

Jamie: Yeah?

Laura: If you’re 110, then Halloween is the perfect holiday for you.

Jamie: Yeah. Oh yeah, you don’t have to dress up.

[Everyone laughs]

Kevin: It’s true, yeah.

Jamie: Although, I’m sure – no, no, no. Come on. I think you can be too old for it.

Laura: Nope, you’re wrong.

Kevin: I don’t think you can.

Jamie: It’s like… Go on!

Laura: Hey! Halloween – I’ll remind you all – Halloween is J.K. Rowling’s favorite holiday. So, you can never be too old for Halloween.

Jamie: But, that doesn’t mean you could – that’s good, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be too old for it.

[Andrew laughs]

Laura: I never said… I said you can’t be too old for Halloween. It’s an awesome holiday.

Andrew: I mean I’m not going to be going trick-or-treating.

Laura: Well, it doesn’t mean you have to trick-or-treat.

Andrew: I feel a little too old for that, yeah. Well, I’m going to be…

Jamie: What else are you meant to do, then?

Andrew: Everyone in my school, you know, everyone… I was sort of outed this year with the whole Harry Potter thing. So, I’m going to be Harry Potter.

Jamie: Really?

Laura: Really?

Andrew: No cloak.

Kevin: You don’t have a cloak?

Laura: Do you remember last year when people dressed up as us?

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: Yeah, that contest.

Jamie: No. [laughs]

Kevin: Oh yeah, that was…

Laura: Wasn’t that weird?

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah. That was pretty funny. But, I’m going to be hosting the morning show program that we do, and we have to dress up.

Jamie: Nice.

Andrew: Me and my friend are going to be Harry Potter. I’m going to be vested…

Jamie: Hey!

Andrew: What?

Jamie: Doesn’t being Harry Potter just involve drawing a scar and putting on some glasses? That’s what everyone seems to do.

Andrew: Scarf? No, not scarf. Yeah. Scar, glasses. I’m going to wear the gray vest.

Jamie: Dye your hair black as well?

Andrew: The white under shirt.

Kevin: Yeah, Andrew. Do you have…

Andrew: The black pants.

Kevin: Do you have the Triwizard Cup still?

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: You can bring that around. [laughs]

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: The one you were supposed to give away like three months ago.

Laura: You know what this reminds me of?

Andrew: I don’t know what you’re talking about, Kevin. [laughs]

Kevin: Okay?

Laura: I was actually hired to work on MuggleNet on Halloween.

Andrew: Really?

Kevin: Really?

Laura: So, this Halloween is going to be my two-year anniversary, yes.

Andrew: Oh wow.

Kevin: That was a sad day in MuggleNet history.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: It’s been downhill from there.

Kevin: Yep.

Andrew [laughs]: Anyway…

Laura: That’s what they all say.


Announcements


Andrew: Let’s get people up-to-date here on some things that we’re doing around the podcast. We have the new website up. Hopefully everyone’s enjoyed that. We’ve gotten a lot of good feedback about it. We’re working on the comments.

Laura: Even though the comments don’t work.

Andrew: Yeah, we’re working on that. It’s a MuggleNet server issue. It’s not really our fault. And also every week, we’re going to be making a round-up post, that’ll basically go over what the feedback was of the previous week’s show. And Laura did the first one for Episode 58. And without the comments, we have no way of telling if people like it or not. [laughs]

Laura: If you guys actually liked it.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: So, if you guys hated it, just write me and tell me you hated it.

Andrew: It’ll just be a good way of keeping the site fresh and going over some people’s feedback.


Transcript Update


Andrew: Micah you got an update about the transcripts?

Jamie: Yeah.

Micah: Yeah. Just the database is finally up-to-date, after a couple of months. I think since about the summertime. We’ve had some problems getting things up to you guys in a timely fashion. But, everything should start to be moving along smoothly. We have a lot of stuff going on right now. We’re still working on L.A. with Leaky, and Episode 58 and now 57, and now 59. So, we might get backed up a little bit.

Jamie: Cool.

Micah: But, I want to take just a moment to thank everyone. This is going to be like one of Jamie’s V for Vendetta lists right here.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: Hey!

Micah [laughs]: Because there are a lot of people. But, just to thank the transcribers, I’m just going to go through the list real quick: Shelly, Shannon, Sarah, Roni, Megan, Marti, Mandie, Judy, Jessica, Amanda, Ally, Adrienne, Matthew. And then we have three editors: Margaret, Eloise, and Allison. And we just added two this week: Samantha and Brianna.

[Kevin laughs]

Micah: So, thanks you guys!

Jamie: Thank you!

Andrew: Thank you! Look at this team Micah has built!

Laura: Thanks!

Micah: I know!

Jamie: Micah.

Andrew: It’s an excellent job, Micah.

Laura: He remembers.

Jamie: He remembers. Yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Micah: To think that I used to do the episodes all by myself.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: You know, I meant to tell you this the other day. I was thinking about this for some reason before I went to bed one night. I was just thinking about how great it was – the best idea we ever had to hire Micah. Seriously.

Kevin: Thank you.

Andrew: Thanks, Micah.

Laura: Awww, Micah.

Kevin: It’s like a sweat shop.

Jamie: Do you think about Micah every night before you go to sleep?

Andrew: Yeah, I do. [laughs]

[All laugh]

Jamie: I certainly do, so there’s no shame in it.

Andrew: I have a picture of him on my night stand.

Jamie: Yeah.

Laura: That’s kind of creepy.

Jamie: I’ve got seven.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]


MuggleCast T-Shirts


Andrew: Also, MuggleCast t-shirts – we haven’t done this in awhile – we have some new MuggleCast t-shirt designs and I don’t think we’ve plugged them at all on the show. So, go to MuggleCast.com…

Jamie: We always plug them.

Andrew: …and click on “Store” at the link or “Store” at the top. [laughs] Is it called “store” or “shop”?

Jamie: One of them. It’s one of them.

Andrew: “Store.” It’s called “Store.”

Jamie: Go to either.

Andrew: Pick up one of these great new t-shirt designs. They are really cool. I saw one – I saw the first one at the live Leaky Mug. Someone was wearing it. And it’s very nice. It’s a MuggleCast Crest t-shirt. Then, we also have Lumos shirts up for sale and we’re working on one more design which should be out around Christmas, but for now, purchase your MuggleCast t-shirt today. Help support the show. Thank you very much.

Jamie: I agree.


Episode 57 Update


Andrew: Also, after much skepticism, complaints, barrates, all these, all these, all this – ah, it just hurts so much. Episode 57 is finally released, four weeks late, but, hey. It’s out.

Jamie: It’s still out?

Andrew: It’s a bit of a mess. I had to record the second half of the show again. Well, my voice – because my – I lost the audio file. It’s not a bad show, actually. We didn’t make a news post on MuggleNet. We will with this new episode, but, so check that out. Sorry for the delay.

Laura: Yeah. They made you cry, didn’t they Andrew?

Kevin: Wow.

Andrew: Yeah. All of these people were complaining about how we were just doing it to keep up with PotterCast and all this nonsense.

Jamie: How dare they.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: It was just because if you listen to 57 you will see it’s a very dated show. That’s why the title of the show in fact is called MuggleCast 57: This Show is Outdated. So…

[Jamie laughs]

Kevin: Oh. Good title.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs] So, Jamie you got this RS…

Kevin: That’s the one we recorded before LA right?

Andrew: Right before the trip.

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Chocolate Frogs have…

Andrew: Jamie, you got that…

Jamie: Huh?

Andrew: You got the RSVP thing? That’s yours, right?

Jamie: Oh. Oh, yeah. Well, before I do it, I’d just like to say that Chocolate Frogs have furious fights over who gets to be in the box with a Dumbledore card.

[Everyone laughs]

Micah: That was pretty good.

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: From Phoebe, 16, from Texas. Thank you.


RSVP


Okay, the RSVP thing. Okay. Somebody, I can’t remember who because the e-mail got deleted and I can’t remember who, so I’m sorry, wrote in to point out that I had been mispronouncing RSVP. Not the actual abbreviation, but the actual thing. I was saying it’s repondez, s’il vous plait [pronounces it “ray-pond-ay see voo play”] and there’s an “s” in there, so it’s respondez s’il vous plait [pronounces it “ray-spond-ay see voo play”]. Well done to them for spotting out my deliberate error and for pointing it out. So, yeah. Well done, because I did do that on purpose just to test who was listening and who was up to scratch on their French.

Kevin: Oh, I’m sure.

Jamie: Oh, by the way, instead of doing an actual segment for the Dumbledore-Chuck Norris facts, I thought I’d just put them in whenever there’s an awkward silence or gap or something like that. So, let me know if you like that more.

Andrew: [laughs] Okay.


Listener Rebuttal: The Veil


Andrew: We also have a listener rebuttal this week, and then we’ll get into our main discussion. This comes from Valerie, 16, of New York and she just wanted to clear up a little mistake we made on Episode 58.

“I have a rebuttal regarding the Veil. On Episode 58 you mentioned that Ginny could have heard ‘beyond the veil’ because she saw Riddle die. This theory isn’t possible because a few pages earlier it was stated that she couldn’t see the Thestrals so she couldn’t have seen death.”

A lot of people brought this up to us and its true but the eternal optimist could always say, “Well gee, maybe she’s just pretending.”

Laura: No, Valerie’s right.

Andrew: Yeah, I know. She’s right. [laughs]

Laura: Thank you, Valerie.

Andrew: I’m just trying to cover it. So, with that said…

Jamie: So wait, even the eternal optimist would be screwed in this regard, then, completely? [laughs]

Andrew: Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie: Couldn’t win.

Andrew: But with that said we should revise the conclusion that we made last week, which is in order to hear voices from the Veil, you have to have seen death.

Laura: I don’t think so.

Andrew: But now…yeah. But now the general consensus…

Laura: I disagree.

Andrew: I know.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Wait, you weren’t on the show last week right?

Laura: No, I was.

Andrew: Oh, you were.

Laura: But, you guys kept saying that it was death, and I kept saying that Ginny had never seen anyone die.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: You did say that?

Jamie: She says that now. She says that…

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs]

Laura: Okay!

Andrew: You did not say that.

Laura: Go back and listen to the show.

Andrew: Maybe you did.

Laura: I said Ginny has never seen anyone die, therefore…

Jamie: She’s taking all the credit for Valerie’s hard work, Andrew, here. Oh, shameful.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Micah: When the transcripts released tomorrow, we’ll go back and we’ll take a look and see

Laura: No. I can tell you exactly what I said.

Andrew: She probably did. She probably did.

Laura: I said…

Jamie: Yeah. She probably did, yeah. [laughs]

Laura: …I don’t know if Ginny’s seen anyone die so there’s got to be a different common link between those four people.

Andrew: No one brought up the Thestrals though. That was the mistake that we made, saying that Ginny could see the Thestrals.

Laura: The mistake that you made, not me.

Andrew: Okay. Sorry. [laughs]

Laura: I’m just kidding, Andrew. [laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] So now, thinking about it, it could be a near death experience because Ginny was in a near death experience in the Chamber of Secrets.

Laura: Yeah. That was actually in the Roundup that I posted that one listener thought that because – she thought that maybe it was a traumatic experiences that made them more vulnerable to the Veil’s…

Jamie: Power.

Laura: …attraction.

Micah: So, you’re saying Ron and Hermione have never experienced a traumatic event?

Laura: I’m not saying that. I’m saying listener feedback and see it kind of brings into question what would the level of trauma have to be?

Kevin: Considering…yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.

Laura: It’s like, “Yeah, Ron, you almost died when you were 11 years old. That doesn’t count.” You know, so…

Jamie: Yeah. [laughs]


Main Discussion: Time and the Department of Mysteries


Andrew: Alright. So, this week we are going to talk about the Department – well, no. This is continuing our series about the Department of Mysteries. Today we’re going to be talking about [sings] time. Ben’s not hear to sing it with me either. [chokes up]

Jamie: What song is it?

Laura: You’re all alone Andrew.

Andrew: City of Blinding Lights by U2.

Jamie: Oh.

Laura: Oh boy.

Jamie: Why – what does time have to do with that?

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: Or is it – or did you just say time in the theme of City of Blinding Lights [laughs]

Andrew: No, no.

Kevin: He applies every word…

Andrew: That’s what we’re talking about. We’re talking about time.

Jamie: Oh.

Andrew: And in the song they sing [sings] “Time…”

Jamie: Oh, I see.

Andrew: [sings] “Time will leave me as I am. Time taking the boy out of this man.” Okay. Anyway, Jamie go for it. [laughs]

Jamie: Well, okay. Time is an extremely interesting topic because it has been the subject of, you know, sort of a great deal of science fiction films, fantasy novels, and it’s something that you can’t really explain. It’s very complicated, very intense topic, and even for the most powerful of wizards and witches when messed with, it can have dire consequences. So, and especially when it comes down to the Department of Mysteries and time, because obviously the Ministry of Magic isn’t completely, what’s the word? What’s the opposite of corrupt? Sorry, what’s the opposite of non-corrupt? Corrupt. Yeah.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: Congratulations, Jamie.

Jamie: Thank you. Thank you. Fine, fine. So, the Ministry of Magic isn’t completely non-corrupt, so you know, time, when placed in the hands of a bad person, like Voldemort, could be very, very deadly. So, let’s talk about time. Let’s start off with our first question.


Does The Ministry Control Time?


Jamie: How much control does the Ministry have over time, and time meddling, more specifically? And the first bit of that is, it took a long, long time for Hermione to get the Time Turner in The Prisoner of Azkaban. And it seems, because of this, that the Ministry has strict controls, but maybe, like the other Ministry-related things, they are open to outside control. What do you guys think?

Laura: Well, do you think that they were monitoring anything that Hermione was doing with the Time Turner? Because…

Jamie: You mean like tracking what she was doing?

Laura: Yeah, because it seems like if they really wanted to make sure that it wasn’t being abused…

Jamie: Oh yeah.

Laura: …they would, but at the same time, no one’s ever said anything to the trio about going back and saving Sirius.

Jamie: Well, exactly. You’d think that they’d restrict it so she couldn’t just go back ten years and change stuff that she wanted to, but I’m sure they wouldn’t allow her to go back and rescue Sirius, as you say, so perhaps they don’t. Perhaps the tests are, before she gets it, and then once they’re satisfied she won’t use it for anything bad, they give her free reign over it. Although, that does seem a bit, you know, reckless.

Laura: It’s kind of dangerous, though.

Jamie: It is.

Laura: But, I mean again, it’s something they would do.

Jamie: [coughs] Yeah, no, it is.

Micah: I’m actually rereading Prisoner of Azkaban right now, but I don’t remember. Does the Ministry know that she has the Time Turner?

Laura: Yeah.

Kevin: Yeah.

Jamie: Oh, yeah.

Kevin: Yeah, definitely.

Laura: Yeah, she said that McGonagall had to write tons and tons of letters to get it for her.

Andrew: So maybe they just have to convince them – well, McGonagall just had to convince the Ministry that she could be trusted enough to do this.

Kevin: Now do you think the Ministry is only one with Time Turners?

Jamie: Well, exactly. They’re like – surely you can get one. You can’t, you know….

Kevin: See…

Jamie: And where do they get them from? Do they make them? Or are they natural?

Kevin: You see the thing is, is…

Laura: [laughs] What, do they just pop out of the ground, Jamie?

Kevin: Yeah.

Laura: Like flowers?

Jamie: Yes, yes.

[Laura laughs]

Kevin: They grow on trees.

Jamie: They have Time Turner trees and you just pluck one off and wind it back and you’re fine.

Andrew: When it’s ripe, of course.


Kevin’s Analysis of Time Travel


Kevin: You see…

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: …the thing is about the Time Turner that I never really liked, was that they were able to see themselves in the past. If you know what I mean?

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: Which…

Jamie: No, but that…

Andrew: Why don’t you like it?

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: It, well…

[Jamie laughs]

Laura: Explain, Kevin.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: The reason why I don’t like it is this: If you in the – when you’re visualizing time, if you go back in time, right? And kill yourself, right?

Laura: Mhm.

Kevin: You would never have had the opportunity to go back in time in the first place. And, therefore, you…

Jamie: No, Kevin, stop trying to show off, okay?

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Jamie: Anyone can get this from…

[Micah laughs]

Jamie: …Wikipedia, okay? It has nothing to do with it.

Laura: Well, that’s why… That’s why you don’t go back in time and kill yourself. [laughs] That’s why you don’t do that.

Kevin: No, but what I’m saying is…

Laura: You can’t.

Jamie: No, no, no, no. The point you’re trying to say is, you can’t go back in time and kill yourself because you could – because if you went back in time and killed yourself, you couldn’t go back in time and kill yourself.

Kevin: Exactly.

[Laura laughs]

Kevin: And then you’d…

Jamie: But that has absolutely nothing to do with Harry Potter.

Kevin: No, no, I make a point. This is my point.

Laura: That’s not necessarily true, though. I mean…

Jamie: It is, it is. Of course it is.

Laura: …it depends on what the limitations on time are. No because, in the books, doesn’t it work in a loop? It would just keep going and going and going.

Jamie: No, but if you decided now to go back ten years…

Laura: Like the Energizer Bunny.

Jamie: Huh? [laughs]

Kevin: Okay, how about this?

Jamie: Just like the Energizer Bunny.

Kevin: Instead of saying, kill yourself. If your going back in time results in your death indirectly…

Jamie: Then…

Kevin: …it becomes a paradox.

Jamie: …it precludes your existence, yeah.

Kevin: Yeah, exactly. And what I’m saying is, are even the dark wizards willing to go back in time, knowing the risks involved in doing so?

Jamie: But Kevin, Kevin, you can’t – if you go back in time, yeah? Then – and then you can’t die, because if you died, then you wouldn’t be there to go back in time. So, your mission is automatically a success if you go back in time. Do you see what I mean? Well, no it’s not automatically a success but you come back, you definitely come back.

Kevin: It depends on your view of time. If it’s a linear time…

Jamie: No…

Kevin: …as opposed to a quantum time where there’s…

Jamie: Yeah I definitely… Right, you’ve lost me absolutely completely already.

[Everyone laughs]

Kevin: What I’m saying is, there’s different ways of viewing time. One in a linear fashion or one in, like, the quantum physics fashion, where by going back in time you have just created a new timeline where different things can happen.

Jamie: Oh right. I see.

Kevin: So…

Laura: That what I’m saying, though. I mean, I’m kind of under the impression that time in Harry Potter is circular. Like, for instance…

Kevin: Is like linear? Where…

Laura: Well, okay, let me explain. You know how in the Prisoner of Azkaban movie and I think – I don’t often like to cite the movies because I often feel that they’re incorrect. But you know how at the end when Harry and Hermione come running back and they open the doors and they see themselves disappear?

Jamie: Yeah.

Laura: I believe that the versions of themselves that just disappeared would come running back again and see themselves disappear again, like it keeps going and going and going.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Ohhh…

Laura: So, even if you do kill yourself, it just happens over and over and over again.

Kevin: Which is a paradox again.

Jamie: But surely, Kevin. Surely, Kevin, the time in Harry Potter is one where you don’t create a new timeline because Dumbledore says that they’ve got to be back in the hospital wing at a certain time to replace the ones that have just gone. So, surely, when Dumbledore turned after he sent Harry and Hermione off to do the thing, he just turned around and they were there and it had been a success already. Isn’t that right?

Kevin: But by different timeline I mean the affected events so, therefore, there is a universe in which they did not go back in time or, in which, Sirius died and then there’s a universe…

Laura: That’s interesting.

Kevin: …in which Sirius survived. That’s…

Laura: Let’s discuss this. Do you think that Harry will visit some sort of alternate universe, where things are different?

Kevin: I think that would be a far stretch for the Harry Potter books.

Andrew: A parallel universe? Tell us abut parallel universes, Kevin.

Kevin: Uh, let’s not. [laughs]

Jamie: No, no, no, no, no. He told us about those in Vegas, remember?

Andrew: Yeah, that was a lot of fun hearing about that.

Kevin: I did.


Would Dark Wizards Use Time Travel?


Kevin: But what I’m saying is, my point is…is… Do you think that dark wizards are – would avoid time and time travel because of the implications of making a mistake?

Laura: Well, it depends. I think that Voldemort would avoid it.

Jamie: No. No, Voldemort, yeah.

Laura: But I think he would make people do it for him.

Kevin: Yeah, but even…

Jamie: Yeah, it’s too powerful for him to…

Kevin: But even then you have to realize you can, you can catch yourself and you can catch, like, time itself in a loop where nothing…

Laura: Yeah, that’s true.

Kevin: …will move forward.

Laura: I mean, if one of his followers screwed up…

Kevin: Exactly, so do you think that Voldemort would actually be willing to take the risk of…

Laura: Hmmm.

Jamie: I think he – I think he’d trust it to some people.


Who Does Regulate Time?


Laura: I think that kind of brings us back to, who does regulate time? You know?

Andrew: It’s got to be the Ministry.

Jamie: You can’t regulate it, really.

Laura: That’s the thing. You almost wonder if anyone has any sort of view, you know, of what’s going on. If Voldemort would be able to know what was going on, if he would be able to somehow direct a person who had gone back in time to do something. You know?

Jamie: Yeah.

Laura: It’s difficult.

Jamie: It is difficult.

Laura: You can’t exactly send someone a letter telling them what to do if
they’ve gone back in time.

Jamie: Yeah, it’s true.

[Jamie and Kevin laugh]

Laura: [laughs] I think we’re confusing ourselves.

Kevin: Well, it’s a very confusing subject.

Laura: [laughs] Yeah.


Repercussions of Going Back in Time


Kevin: And also, is there a limitation on how far back in time you can go?

Laura: I don’t think so. I never got that impression.

Jamie: I have.

Kevin: So, you’re saying that Hermione could have taken the Time Turner,
flipped the Time Turner a million times…

Jamie: A million times.

Andrew: [laughs] See dinosaurs.

Kevin: …gone back to right before Harry’s parents were killed and saved their lives?

Jamie: Yeah. No. Well, yes, she could have done.

Laura: Well, not necessarily save their lives, but then again she’d have to
live through those sixteen, or thirteen, fourteen years. She couldn’t just, you know?

Jamie: Yeah, exactly, she couldn’t – you can’t go forward in time. But
I’m under the impression she couldn’t do that because if she’d done that Harry’s parents would be alive now. I know that you’re saying that you have
different timelines, but…

Laura: Yeah. It’s hypothetical, though.

Jamie: …I don’t think that’s the case in Harry Potter.

Laura: I think Kevin’s just trying to make a point.

Jamie: Yeah, but…

Kevin: Yeah, my point is, is that the repercussions of changing anything in
the past are so great that, you know, the smallest thing…

Jamie: It’s smart to not do it.

Kevin: If you push one person out of the way of a moving car, right, that person surviving could change everything.

Jamie: Everything could change. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They could go on a… Yeah.
yeah.


Did The Trio’s Time Travel Affect The Future?


Laura: Well, do you think that maybe the trio accidentally changed something that seemed so minute in the third book and it’s going to come up in the seventh book, and it’s going to make everything even more difficult?

Andrew: Like what?

Laura: I’m just… I don’t have any specific examples, I’m just saying, Kevin brings up a good…

Andrew: Instead of turning the light off they left it on?

Laura: Yeah, you know, something just…

Andrew: The light bulb bursts, and someone…

Kevin: Someone didn’t trip, didn’t hit their head…

Andrew: …has to go out and change the light bulb, which triggered Draco. Oh, come on, I was on a roll, Kevin. But there’s no light bulbs at Hogwarts, so that sort of doesn’t work out. So…

Laura: [laughs] What?

[Andrew, Kevin, Laura laugh]


More Monitoring Time


Jamie: Should we move on to the next one? Can’t they monitor when someone
has changed time or have we done that? Perhaps, actually, think about it. Would you think that’s, like they can tell where magic has been…

Kevin: Like a resonance that leaves some sort of…

Jamie: …was being done, but they can’t tell who by. Yeah, yeah. Perhaps it’s that they can monitor that somebody has gone back but and done something, but they can’t tell what. So, when they see Hermione going back in Prisoner of Azkaban, they just think that it’s her going back to do her lessons, rather than…

Andrew: Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Jamie: But wait a minute…

Andrew: But wouldn’t they be able to watch or something?

Jamie: Well, I guess so, but…

Laura: That’d be kind of creepy, though.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Because that would mean that they would be watching her all the time…

Andrew: Well, that’s just one of the…

Laura: …which is gross.

Andrew: …one of the rules you have to deal with.

Jamie: You can tune in to channel 415: Hermione. Like cable.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Laura: Whenever they feel like it, Jamie?

Jamie: Whenever they feel like it.

[Laura laughs]


Hermione’s Time Travel


Jamie: But wouldn’t she be going to – wouldn’t she be going to one class twice? So, say if at 10:00 AM – no, say if at 9. Actually, no. Yeah, say if at 9:00 AM she’s got Muggle Studies, yeah?

Laura: Mhm.

Jamie: And at 9:00 AM she’s got Arithmancy. If she went back in time to go to Arithmancy, wouldn’t she be void…

Laura: Then she’s in Muggle Studies again.

Jamie: No. No, no, no, she wouldn’t be in Muggle Studies, though, because she’d be in Arithmancy. So, as Kevin says, there have got to be two, two different things of time, but…

Laura: Oh my god, this is so confusing. [laughs]

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: They aren’t parallel, they’ve got to…

Kevin: That’s what I’m saying, yeah.

Jamie: …catch up at some point. See what I mean? Because if she goes back in time to go to one at 9:00 AM she can’t be in two places at once, so she’s got to be missing from one, unless it’s two different periods of time. Does that make sense?

Kevin: Yeah, yeah, but remember what, remember what Harry and Ron were saying. They saw they saw her in class. So what she probably did was, she went to class, went back in time and went to another class, so she technically was in two places at once, until the point at which she had used it.

Jamie: At which they coincide. Yeah.

Kevin: Exactly.

Laura: Yeah, I don’t know. I’m not sure about that because if say she weren’t in one class whenever she went to the other, there’d be no point in saying you can’t be seen. You know?

Jamie: Well, yeah, I guess, but…

Laura: You’re still going to run across yourself. Wasn’t there one point in
the book where Hermione was walking with them and she suddenly disappeared
and was at the bottom…

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

Laura: …of the stairs?

Kevin: Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: You think she’d be a bit more subtle instead of just walking along
and disappear, you know?

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: You’d think she’d go into the toilet like Superman and turn the Time Turner.

[Kevin laughs]

Laura: Yeah, but what if they had just run across one of her past selves? And if she just disappeared?

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, yeah. No, no, no, or…

Kevin: Yeah, it’s true.

[Jamie and Laura laugh]

Jamie: …or if she’s – this can’t go into the show, really, but if
she goes into the toilet and she turns the time back and somebody’s in there taking a [bleep].

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: She just lands on top of them.

[Everyone laughs]


Back to Monitoring Time


Micah: But I don’t think they can monitor the changing of time just because
they would be able to know exactly what happened that night. They know that
Sirius was freed somehow…

Kevin: It’s true, yeah.

Micah: …and if they knew…

Andrew: Well, that’s what I was thinking…

Micah: Sorry.

Andrew: No, you can finish.

Laura: Well, clearly the Ministry doesn’t know because Fudge had no clue. He was just pointing fingers. So…

Micah: [laughs] Fudge never has a clue.

[Kevin laughs]

Laura: I know, but [sighs] if the Ministry did know, then Fudge would know, you know? They would obviously tell him, hopefully.

Micah: But there was Ministry presence that was there, though, wasn’t there that night?

Laura: Ummm…

Micah: Because the Dementors were going to perform the Kiss.

Laura: Well, Fudge was there.

Micah: Right.

Laura: Fudge came.

Micah: So, you would think that if they knew Hermione used the Time Turner at this time during the day to go back in time…

Laura: Exactly.

Micah: …that they would have connected the two events.

Kevin: Yeah, it’s true.

Laura: So, obviously, they can’t even monitor when she uses it.

Jamie: No, yeah.

Micah: Maybe that’s part of why it’s so…

Andrew: Dangerous.

Jamie: Dangerous.

Micah: …such a problem to entrust it into even a student that is under the watch of professors.

Andrew: I don’t know. I just think if they’re issued by the Ministry, you would think they would take the responsibility of tracking what people are doing with them.

Jamie: You would hope so, yeah.

Andrew: I doubt when they were trying to figure out how Sirius escaped, I don’t think the first thing they checked was Hermione’s Time Turner.

Laura: No, but then again…

Andrew: And she wouldn’t be as looked at.

Laura: …this is the same group of people that put Dementors as guards on a prison, you know? Creatures that are known to serve Lord Voldemort, they’re putting in charge of his followers. It just doesn’t seem like they’d be all that intelligent when it came to how they ran things.

Andrew: Right.

Laura: Especially time.

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Well, I mean, that would explain why they wouldn’t check Hermione’s Time Turner.

Laura: Yeah. Well, I’m not sure you can check, though. I’m just not sure I believe that it’s like you can log into whatever and check to see Hermione changed time at 4:52 PM, you know?

Kevin: Yeah, it’s true.

Andrew: Well, maybe not, but, I don’t know. You can track magic – well, we’ll get into this more later when talk about how…

Laura: Oh my god, my head is spinning. [laughs]

Andrew: I think it’s going good. So just…


Can Anyone Change Time?


Jamie: Okay. Number two: Can anyone with the right tools change time, or do you need magic in you, like you need magic when using a wand, because the wand just channels the magic?

Laura: We had an – Andrew and I had an interesting discussion about this the other day.

Andrew: And then I stopped it because I was like, “Save it for the show!”

[Kevin, Laura, and Andrew laugh]

Laura: Yeah. No, basically we were kind of talking about, could a Muggle or a squib use a Time Turner? Because I’m not necessarily sure they could, but my point was that a wand isn’t really a source of magic. It channels the magic from its owner. A Time Turner is actually magical itself. So, would…

Jamie: Well, we think it is.

Laura: Well, it’s got to be. It’s changing time, it’s not the wizard that’s changing time. Well, I mean the wizard does, but…

Jamie: No, but it could be magic that’s put into it.

Andrew: The wizard could be – right, right. The same way a wand is.

Laura: No, but that’s not true, though. Because remember in Order of the Phoenix whenever they knocked over the Time Turners, and they kept reappearing and falling back over by themselves? So, it wasn’t magic that was put into them.

Jamie: No, that could just be…

Laura: They were fixing themselves and breaking again.

Andrew: There has to be some magic in them, but you might also need the wizard’s magic. Which I thought that’s what you were telling me the other day.

Laura: No, no, no. I was saying you need a wizard’s magic to use a wand.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: But I’m not necessarily sure you need a wizard’s magic to use a Time Turner.

Micah: When you say, “change time,” do you mean specifically with a Time Turner or is there another way that you’re talking about?

Laura: Well, we know that – we’ve seen another method of time in the Department of Mysteries where that one Death Eater fell into the bell jar and it caused his head to become that of a baby’s. And was kind of different because it wasn’t really changing time, it was…

Micah: Changing bodies.

Kevin: Reverting, yeah.

Laura: Making him younger.

Kevin: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah, it was making him younger and it was also a lot faster. Whereas with the Time Turner you actually have to live back through all of those events over again. With the bell jar he was going back and forth between being a baby and being a Death Eater within seconds.

Jamie: Yeah.

Micah: Well, I think if a Muggle or a squib got a hold of a Time Turner, and they just turned it a little bit, something might happen.

Jamie: This is so tough, this stuff.

Kevin: It really is, yeah.

Laura: I know! Now I know how…

Jamie: I need some infantile humor to take away from the seriousness.

Laura: Do you remember… [laughs] If you’ll remember on the Prisoner of Azkaban DVD where Alfonso Cuaron was trying to explain the whole time cycle and he couldn’t?

Jamie: Oh, really?

Laura: Now I know how he feels.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: Because it’s like…

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: He’s only done Spanish movies, so we’ve got to give him something.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Yeah. Wasn’t Jo sitting with him or was that a separate interview?

Laura: Yeah. Yeah, Jo was sitting with him.

Andrew: Did she try and explain it at all?

Laura: No. She just looked at him and she was like, “Yeah, yeah, it is very hard.” [laughs]

[Kevin laughs]

Andrew: “Oh, thanks.” [laughs]

Laura: [laughs] She basically gave him that look like, “Um, yeah.”

Andrew: I wonder if the bell jar, like…how does it…the baby. How young was the baby? Was it a week old, a month old?

Laura: I don’t know, it just said “baby.”

Andrew: What determines – yeah. What determines how far back it brings you?

Laura: Well, apparently, I mean, we saw in the bell jar that there was – wasn’t there an egg in there and as it floated to the top it turned into a bird or something, and then as it went back down to the bottom it would turn back into an egg. So, I think it probably takes you back to the earliest form of life, I suppose.

Jamie: No, because the earliest form of life for a baby is…

Laura: I knew this was coming! I knew this was coming!

[Jamie and Andrew laugh]

Jamie: Well, it’s true!

Laura: I didn’t want to bring this up because then it gets into the whole topic of when does life start, and we don’t need to go there.

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, true, fair point.


Evolution


Andrew: Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Jamie: Andrew, there is an easy answer to this. It’s clearly the egg.

Laura: Yeah.

Jamie: Because evolution says that there has to be something before a chicken, before something evolved into a chicken. So, the one stage before a chicken, that thing laid an egg, and then that hatched into a chicken.

[Kevin and Micah laugh]

Andrew: But what laid an egg?

Jamie: That’s why we – huh? A chicken minus one.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Well, that’s like saying a mother came along and gave birth to Adam and Eve.

Laura: No, no, no, no, it’s not.

Jamie: No, it’s not, it’s not.

Laura: No, he’s right. He’s right, Andrew. Whatever came before the chicken, whatever the chicken’s ancestor is, laid the egg and the evolution over time brought us to the chicken.

Jamie: Hey, look. Andrew.

Andrew: You guys are such dorks.

Jamie: Andrew.

Andrew: Because anyone else you ask that, they’re just like, “Oh, I don’t know.”

Jamie: Andrew?

Andrew: What?

Jamie: Look at it like this. If you have, “What came first, the snake or the egg?” Okay? The egg came first because a snake with one leg laid an egg and then that hatched into a snake with no legs, which is really a snake. Whereas the snake with one leg isn’t really a snake. Do you see?

Andrew: Uhhh… [laughs]

Laura: What we’re saying is…

Kevin: It’s all based on evolution.

Laura: Yeah, if you think about it, humans are slowly evolving. I mean, it’s so minimal that each generation has, you know, some sort of small change to them, but it’s so, just, minimal that you can’t even notice it. Isn’t there some sort of prediction that eventually, humans are going to no longer have their pinky finger? One day? We’re just…

Jamie: I hope not.

Laura: [laughs]Humans are only going to have four fingers.

Kevin: Oh, that would stink.

Laura: So it’s like, saying, you know, over time, like for instance, the mother who had a centimeter of her pinky finger that gave birth to the child with no pinky finger. You know what I’m saying?

Andrew: Well, that’s like people saying about your appendix. People think that that it used to be a second stomach? Ever hear that one?

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Kevin: That would have been awesome.

Jamie: You’d get to Subway and then go back.

Laura: Now it’s just…

Jamie: Now it’s…

Andrew: Ready to cause appendicitis.

Laura: Burst.

Andrew: Yeah, exactly. [laughs] But anyway. What purpose does…

Laura: [laughs] How did we get…

Andrew: From the chicken to the egg.

Kevin: This came from the chicken to the egg floating to the top and then the bird floats up.

Laura: [laughs] Yeah, okay.

Kevin: Yeah, but…


The Bell Jar


Jamie: Let’s move from the bell jar and move to number four, will…

Andrew: Well, hold on. What purpose does the bell jar serve?

Kevin: I think the bell jar was just an…

Laura: It was just research.

Kevin: Yeah, it was just an experiment.

Andrew: Oh, okay.

Kevin: And the only reason why it went back as far as it did, back to the egg, is just probably the way they set up the experiment.

Laura: Mhm.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Well, they probably – what they’re trying to do is probably monitor time change in a very fast setting.

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Laura: So they don’t have to sit there and watch, you know, a chicken take four weeks to grow.

Kevin: Yeah.

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: Or maybe they did it in case the parents didn’t take a picture of the baby…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: …as a newborn. So, they charge a small fee and you can…

Jamie: Or they’d forgotten what their first word was, so…

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: So, they were like, “let’s just chuck you back into time and we’ll see what you said.”

Andrew: [laughs] Uh huh. All right, so moving along here.


Will Time Feature in Book Seven?


Jamie: Okay. Number four: Will time feature in Book Seven? Will the trio use it again to right an injustice? How far back in time would the trio go in order to change something? This goes back to what we were talking about. I don’t think they’d ever dare go back to when Harry’s parents were alive.

Laura: Mhm.

Kevin: Yeah, and that’s what I was saying about even dark wizards. I don’t think anyone would even risk the repercussions that it’d result from.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: It’s too unreliable. Way too unreliable.

Kevin: They… The further you go back, the more that things can change from a single action.

Laura: Mhm.

Kevin: You know? Because it grows off of itself. So…

Laura: Yeah, but that’s why I was kind of bringing up, what if they do something so seemingly…

Kevin: Well, technically they did.

Laura: Yeah, but what if it’s something so seemingly unimportant while they were changing time, that it’s going to come back and bite them in the butt, you know?

Kevin: Well, it really won’t matter because they never had a perspective on what was going to happen in the future anyway. What I’m saying is if you are here now, and you go back five years, a subtle change there can change the here and now largely.

Jamie: Of course, yeah.

Laura: Oh god.

Kevin: Because they only went back a couple hours, when they did end up getting to their current time, the time at which they had gone back, it didn’t – nothing major had changed. And that’s good. But what I’m saying is if you go back further than that, if you go back years or, you know, hundreds of years…

Jamie: Millenniums.

Kevin: …the slightest… Exactly.

Laura: Mhm. Oh, yeah, it’s a huge risk.

Kevin: Then the slightest change – one life can make a huge change, to the point where when you catch up to the current time, things can be completely different.

Laura: Oh, man.

Andrew: Yeah. It always scares me, like what if there was no Thomas Edison? What if there’s no Al Gore?

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: What happens if there was no Bono? Andrew?

Andrew: What if there’s no… No. I can’t even think about that.

Micah: But Book Seven, yeah, I don’t think time is going to factor in at all. I think we saw it in Book Three and…

Laura: I don’t know though, I don’t agree!

Micah: They’re not going to pull out a Time Turner and be like, “Oh, let’s go back in time five minutes….”

Laura: I don’t think so though.

Micah: “…and make sure that Dawlish dies.”

Kevin: There’s too many questions regarding it.

Laura: I think there has to – something has to happen with it. It might not be… I don’t know. I just think that time is too important in these books not to have a place in Book Seven.

Micah: But I think it’s a cop out at the same time, to think that they’re going to be able to back in time and correct an event that takes place.

Kevin: Yeah, definitely.

Laura: No, I don’t think they’re going to go back and correct a major event, but I think that there’s going to have to be some sort of study of time. It just seems interesting to me. You know, JK Rowling put – I don’t even know why I’m calling her that. Jo put a huge emphasis on time in the Department of Mysteries. She had them in that room two or three times, didn’t she? I just don’t think… I think that Harry is going to go back to the Department of Mysteries. I think he’s going to study the Veil, I think he’s going to study time, and I think he’s going to get behind that door.

Andrew: Why study that stuff, though, unless you absolutely need it?

Laura: Because it’s important.

Micah: So, you think he’s going to go to the Department of Mysteries and say, “Hey, I’m here to study the Veil. You mind letting me in.”

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs]

Micah: And he’s going to go downstairs, take out his book, and start writing with his quill?

Kevin: Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah. [laughs]

Laura: I don’t think it’s that kind of study. I think he’s going to come back and actually have to do something with that. I think he’s going to have to find out exactly what these things are. She would not have introduced us to this place if we weren’t going to learn
about it.

Jamie: Could they solve absolutely everything, like, eliminate the conflict, by going back in time and stopping Snape from overhearing the prophecy?

Laura: I don’t think they would.

Kevin: But that’s what I’m saying…

Jamie: Too risky, like I said.

Laura: Yeah, I agree with Kevin here, I don’t think they would.

Kevin: You can’t predict what’s going to happen by doing that, and I think it would really screw things up. It would not result in the – in the same, you know, outcome, and it would… Obviously, it would not result in the same outcome, and things would be really screwed up. But, for all you know, by not letting Snape hear the prophecy, something else happens that results in Harry’s death.

Jaime: Yeah.

Kevin: And then…

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: …oops, now you have Voldemort running around without Harry to stop him.

Jamie: Well, yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah.

Micah: Well, plus you have to live through 16 years of…

Kevin: Exactly.

Laura: Yeah, exactly. [laughs]

Kevin: And by the time you catch up to yourself, you’re not even going to know what’s going on. So…

Micah: And, do you age? That’s another question: do you age in time? Like, will he – would he be 16 years older than he initially was?

Andrew: When he – when he went back?

Jamie: No.

Kevin: So, he would go back in time at 16 and then…

Laura: I don’t see how time could stop you from – I mean, it’s time.

Andrew: Yeah, it’s still moving.

Laura: You can’t stop yourself from aging.

Kevin: So he would arrive at 32?

Micah: So if he went back to that – the night of the prophecy. Yeah, exactly.

Laura: Basically, like, let’s say that Hermione goes back 100 years, she’s going to die before she gets back to where she was.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs]

Laura: I know that’s not… [laughs] It isn’t a cheerful thought, but…

Kevin: So, does she stop existing at the time she went back? That’s the question.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: If she…

Laura: Kevin, you’re twisting my brain here. I can’t…

Kevin: In…in…

Laura: I can’t do this.

Kevin:The Prisoner of Azkaban, if they replace themselves that went back in time, doesn’t that mean that she’ll never catch up to herself that goes back in time, so she’ll just die and stop existing?

Jamie: I don’t know. That’s too complicated, far too complicated. But, the one thing I do know is that the only time Dumbledore was wrong was when he thought he made a mistake.

[Andrew, Kevin, and Laura laugh]

Jamie: Thank you, Austin, 15, from Texas.

Andrew: That wasn’t an awkward moment. Kevin was on a roll there.

Kevin: I was on a roll.

Andrew: Why’d you break it?

Jamie: Oh, no, he was on a roll, sorry. I just… Oh, no, no…

Kevin: Way to go.

Jamie: It isn’t only – it doesn’t only have to an awkward moment, I just thought that it seemed like a nice time for it. I’m sorry, Kevin.

Kevin: Oh, okay.

Jamie: Go on, go on.

Kevin: Oh, I’m good now.

Jamie: This time stuff is so complicated.

Kevin: Yeah, I think we’re making – we’re going to make everyone sick.

Andrew: It doesn’t matter, though. It’s, it’s going pretty well.

Jamie: Okay, should we move – should we skip out four?

Kevin: We’re…you know what we’re going to do?

Jamie: Should we skip that one?

Kevin: We’re going to cause a number of accidents…

Laura: I know.

Kevin: …because people will be…

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: …concentrating on time so much, they won’t be concentrating on driving while listening to us, and they’re just going to start hitting other…

Jamie: But then, we could just go back in time and save them.

[Laura laughs]

Kevin: Oh, that’s true. Yeah.

Laura: [laughs] Yeah.

Jamie: Just go back in time and not record the show, and then they’ll be fine, so it’s okay.

Kevin: You’re right, yep.


Why Can’t You Be Seen Traveling Back in Time?


Jamie: Okay, number five: Why is it so important that you are not seen when traveling back in time? And is it that you can’t be seen at all, or just not by yourself? I actually saw a TV program a few years ago, where you could go back in time, and see yourself, but you couldn’t touch yourself. And if you touched yourself, it caused like a…an…a universal paradox…

Kevin: It’s a paradox.

Jamie: …and the entire universe exploded.

Laura: I think what it is, you can see your past self…

Micah: Yeah.

Jamie: Your past self. Yeah, yeah.

Laura: …and other people can see you, but your past self can’t see your future, you know what I’m saying? Because, like, the trio all saw their…

Micah: Yeah, there’s no way…

Laura: …past selves whenever they went back, and obviously tons of other people saw…

Micah: There’s just no way that they didn’t see her.

Laura: …Hermione’s…

Jamie: Yeah.

Laura: …multiple personalities wandering around the school.

Kevin: I thought that they described some of the consequences. Wasn’t it that, like, you can’t predict what you…

Jamie: You go mad, yeah.

Andrew: How? If you know you have the other Time Turner, then…

Kevin: Yeah, you can’t predict what the other person…

Andrew: And you see…

Kevin: Yeah, well, well that’s one thing.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: But you can’t really predict – for example, if Harry had seen himself, prior to knowing there was a Time Turner, what is Harry going to think?

Jamie: Yeah. His dad, maybe again, just like when he saw himself.

Kevin: Yeah, right. Either that or kill him.

Laura: Right, Jamie, what would you do if [laughs] you saw yourself walk into a room?

Jamie: I would challenge myself to an arm wrestle, and then see who wins.

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: That would be awesome.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: Challenge myself to a fight.

Kevin: Yeah, but see, the problem is that…

Andrew: Would either win?

Kevin: …other people can look like you…

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: …by using…

Micah: Yeah, what if…

Jamie: Yeah, but not identical.

Kevin: Yes, but that’s what I’m saying. I mean, look at, look at Moody. He was Moody, everyone knew him as Moody, but he wasn’t.

Micah: Yeah, but what happens if…

Kevin: So, if Harry saw himself…

Jamie: Oh, you mean so if… Yeah.

Kevin: …the first thing he’s going to assume is that someone disguised as – exactly. Pull out his wand and try to kill him, so now you just killed yourself in the future. [laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah.

Jamie: I think it would be a bit hasty to just kill him.

Kevin: I don’t know, I mean you can’t predict your reaction to seeing yourself.

Andrew: Well, I mean, in Hermione’s case, if the rule – if she said the rule was, “I’m not allowed to let the other version of myself see me,” but if you know you have a Time Turner…

Laura: Maybe it’s a little different, then. But, I mean, Dumbledore continually said, “You can’t be seen.”

Andrew: I guess that makes sense if people see two of you, because…

Laura: So, obviously…

Andrew: …maybe the Ministry doesn’t want anyone knowing who has Time Turners, because then, like, say Malfoy could… If Malfoy…

Laura: Yeah, but can you imagine…

Andrew: Hold on, if Malfoy knew that Hermione had a Time Turner, Malfoy could get Hermione to maybe take him back in time to, you know, change something to cause some sort of damage.

Kevin: Yeah, but…

Andrew: I’m saying just a little incident…

Laura: Yeah, but can you imagine, like…

Andrew: …in the past day, not like, you know…

Laura: I’m just not even sure that Hermione could even, even if you have a Time-Turner, that you should be seeing your future self, because what would Hermione have done if she’d seen herself rescuing someone that she thought was a criminal? Because obviously, if her past, you know, if her past self had seen her future self saving Sirius Black, she would’ve been like, “What was I thinking?” [laughs] or, “What will I be thinking?”

Micah: No… What if it’s event specific? And think about the people that are involved. When it’s going on during school hours and most likely people know, at least among the teachers, that she’s using it, there wouldn’t be any cause for concern, but think of all the people that are involved in the situation when she goes back in time at the end of Prisoner of Azkaban.

Kevin: Yeah, it’s true.

Micah: Would you really want somebody like Snape seeing you, would you want somebody…

Laura: Yeah, that’s true.

Micah: …like Wormtail seeing you?

Kevin: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: Because what use would you have for going back in time at that situation? And they’re going to immediately assume that you’re going to – you’re changing something for the better or for your own reasons, and I’m sure that’s not going to fly with the Ministry.

Micah: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: So, I think it’s just a – just the repercussions of, you know, possibly changing things or seeing yourself out of context and doing something drastic.

Laura: I think our brains have all been appropriately twisted now.

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

Kevin: If you aren’t bleeding from the ears yet, you will be.

Andrew:

[says in strange voice] Well, for more on time…

Jamie: For more on time, go to Level
Nine
on MuggleNet, which I thought was pretty comprehensive, but after talking about it on the show, I realize it barely skims the surface. But still go there anyway.

Andrew: Maybe you should provide a link on Level Nine to this episode of MuggleCast.

Jamie: I should. It is Mugglenet.com/LevelNine, I think. Let me just check that quickly.

Kevin: Is nine spelled out or…?

Andrew: Yeah, it’s “slash” LevelNine. It’s spelled out.


Laura Mallory: Second Try


Andrew: Guys, last week we tried to give Laura Mallory a call and we asked if maybe…

Jamie: Did we?

Andrew: Yeah, we did. And no answer; we got the voicemail, said, “Your call is very important to us,” Ben left a message, asked for her to call us back and no response, so…

Laura: Imagine that.

Andrew: Let’s try giving her a call one more time and – give her a call one more time and see if maybe she answers this time.

Jamie: Yeah, let’s do it.

Andrew: She’s in [using incorrect pronunciation] Decatur…Decatur…Decatur, Georgia?

Laura: [using correct pronunciation] It’s Decatur. Decatur.

[laughs and mocks Andrew’s incorrect pronunciation] Decatur.

Andrew: Her number is, for anyone at home who wants to give her a call…

Laura: Andrew! Don’t do that.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Now, you guys can’t talk to her because we’re on speakerphone. She’s not going to answer.

Laura: I would laugh if she did.

Andrew: Shhh, shhh.

Kevin: I know, she’s going to pick up. It’s…

Andrew: Shut up! Shut up!

Jamie: Andrew, Andrew…

[Phone ringing]

Jamie: Just be polite, whatever you do.

Answering Machine: Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice message system.

Andrew: Oh. Oh, jeez.

Answering Machine: Laura Mallory is not available. At the tone…

Andrew: That’s a different number.

Answering Machine: …please leave a message. When you are finished recording or press one for
more options.

Laura: Is that her cell phone?

Andrew: Yeah. Shhh! [leaving message] Hi, Laura. This is Andrew Sims, from MuggleCast. I just wanted to ask you a couple questions about your concerns with the Harry Potter series. You talked to my associate, Ben, last week. Well, he left you a message on your phone at home and he said – well, in your voicemail it says that your call is very important to us, but unfortunately, we didn’t get a call back.

Laura: [laughs throughout call] So stupid.

Andrew: So, we’d like to have a small interview with you on our show. It gets about a million listeners a week, so, you know, it’d be – it’d be a big-time interview. So, give me a call back. The number is 609-668… Thanks. Bye.

Andrew: Well.

Jamie: Not bad, not bad. Very professional. Very professional, Andrew.

Kevin: That was fun.

Andrew: [sighs] It’s very upsetting.

Laura: We have about a million listeners a week?

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: I just… I want to I want to make it a hot sell, you know what I’m saying?


California Reminiscing


Andrew: Now, Jamie, you weren’t on the show last week.

Jamie: Yeah. I know.

Andrew: And we did have a little discussion about our time in California. Do you have anything to add, perhaps?

Jamie: Yeah. Well, I don’t – I don’t want to repeat what everyone else has said, but I’m sure the word “awesome” has come up a lot of times from what other people have said, and you’d all be right if you called it awesome. It was absolutely awesome. It was…

Laura: Mhm.

Jamie: Yeah, it was fantastic. And the – the Leaky Mug, sorry, not the Leaky Mug, I don’t know what I’m talking about. The time at Santa Monica Beach was so, so, so, so good. I felt a peace with nature there, you know?

Andrew: Yeah, yeah. Especially when you made contact with the water.

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, yeah. I did, I did. Well, you see, what happened was, you know, people were going in left, right, and center. John had gone, Andrew had gone, you’d gone. And Ben just said to me, “Right, you’re going in.: Now, instead of argue – arguing with him, and he is quite a bit bigger than me, so he could’ve just picked me up and thrown me in and I’d have ruined my cell phone and everything, I just said, “All right, Ben, I’m going in.” So I took my phone out of my pocket, took my – took my wallet out and all my bucks, man, put them down and Ben just picked me up and threw me in the water, and it was freezing. Absolutely freezing.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah, it was awesome. Absolutely awesome.

Andrew: So…

Jamie: And the – Podcast Awards were very cool as well. I felt very proud being there and picking up that award and the microphone and…

Laura: Proud and excited.

Jamie: And, yeah, very proud and excited. And there was a party going on all day with cake and, you know…

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: Cake and… Cake and fruit punch.

Jamie: Cake and fruit punch, yeah. And it was awesome. And the Leaky Mug went very well, as well. It was great to meet everyone out there and I actually got – thank you very much to the people who all got me Lucky Charms.

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: I ended up with like, five boxes of them. So, it was a feast that evening at the Leaky Mug room.

Kevin: Did you get those on your plane? Did they allow all that stuff?

Jamie: Yeah, I did. Well, well, we ate quite a few, you know, there and then, but I put the other ones in my suitcase and I still got some left over, which is quite cool. And thank you for all the other presents, as well. And just – LA is an amazing place, and I had a really, really good time there, so thank you to everyone. And it was great to see you guys.

Andrew: Awww, thanks.

Micah: Didn’t you meet somebody?

Jamie: Did I meet somebody?

Micah: Didn’t you meet somebody you’ve been waiting to meet for a long time? At Disneyworld? Disneyland?

Jamie: No, I didn’t meet him, did I? I didn’t meet him. He was gone.

Andrew: We only saw him once and he was and he was very busy. So…

Jamie: He was having a day off.

Micah: Once?

Andrew: Are you talking about Mickey, Jamie? Or Micah?

Micah: You didn’t meet him?

Jamie: Yeah, we’re talking about Mickey.

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: Are we talking about Mickey?

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs]

Micah: Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, no. He…he… Oh, no, I think I waved at him and he waved at me back, but to be fair, though, I was slightly disappointed. I was hoping for a hug, a handshake, and a…


Listener Rebuttal: Ghosts and The Veil


Andrew: Another listener rebuttal we got this week. It comes from Ryan, 21, of State College, PA. He writes, “Micah…”

[Pause]

Micah: Yeah?

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: “You seem to be one of the most active on this topic, so I figured I would just send this one to you. Jo said there weren’t executions, just studying death. Is it possible that the observers were studying ghosts that came out of the Veil? Is the Veil the gateway back to Earth if you choose to be a ghost? We’re supposed to figure out more about the Veil and more about how people become ghosts, so I figured it might be a connection. Also, check out the Onion Radio Network podcast; it might be suited to your humor.”

There’s a plug for you. Signed, Ryan.”

Micah: Well, I’ll answer the second part about the gateway back to Earth. I think it would be more of a gateway to whatever afterlife there was. We talked about that on the last show, that if this Ministry is built around the Veil and the Veil is sort of the gateway to the underworld; maybe it’s possible that those peoples’ souls who don’t go to the underworld – that they do come back through the Veil, I don’t know. It still wouldn’t explain why the ghosts just can’t, you know, pop on through the other side and that no ghosts came through the Veil at all while they were there. You know, I’m not…

Laura: Because they can’t.

Micah: You think they’re trapped? [laughs]

Laura: No, I just don’t think that… It’s like saying [sighs]

Micah: So basically, you’re telling Ryan, “No!”

Laura: Okay, here’s… [laughs] Here’s why I think that, though… Because Nearly Headless Nick didn’t know anything about the veil. If it were somewhere that ghosts came from, he would obviously know about it. He said that he didn’t know anything about death or what came after it because he chose this feeble imitation of life instead.

[Pause]

Kevin: Shot down, Ryan.

Laura: And I love the silence.

Kevin: Shot down.

Micah: So, hopefully we answered your question, Ryan. I don’t… I don’t think that anything can come back out through the Veil once it’s already behind there, and I think that’s why they’re studying it.


British Joke of the Day


Andrew: Yeah. Yeah. British Joke of the Day.

Jamie: Okay, I don’t, I don’t have one. So, I’ll just say…

Andrew: You never have one.

Jamie: I would. No, I know. Well, I forgot.

Andrew: It used to be a huge segment, now it’s just…

Jamie: Well, I would tell you the joke about the pen, but you probably wouldn’t get the point.

Andrew: Ooh.

Laura: Ooh.

Micah: Ha, ha, ha.

Kevin: That was good.

[Laura laughs]

Jamie: Okay, I need some new ones. I’ll find some for next week, I’m sorry. I just feel like I’ve used them all already. I know that you can’t really use every single joke in the world.

Andrew: Especially with only 59 episodes with one joke a week, and you started on episode three. So…

Jamie: Yeah. I think there are a few more than just 59 jokes in the entire world. So…

Laura: Well it doesn’t matter, Jamie. They can’t be jokes from the entire world; they have to be British jokes. Duh!

Andrew: That’s true. So there’s only, like, 80.

Jamie: Yeah, that is very true. And I do happen to know that there are only 59 jokes in all of Britain, so I’m going to have to go back and start repeating.


Show Close


Andrew: We’d like to remind everyone that if you’d like to send a voicemail question to be aired on this show, make it a general question about the series. To contact us, our P.O. Box is 223 Moundridge, Kansas 67107. All that stuff is sent to Ben, and he forwards it all to us if it’s for us. If you’d like to call us to leave those voicemail questions, if you’re in the United States you can call 1-218-20-MAGIC, which is 1-218-206-2442. In the UK, you call dial 020-8144-0677, and if you’re in Australia you can dial 02-8003-5668. Speaking of Australia, no word yet if we picked up the Kids Choice Award for fave podcast.

Jamie: Hundreds?

Andrew: Yeah, hundreds. We’ll have an update on that next week.

Kevin: Oh, and we should thank everyone for sending in the EA questions. We got a crapload of them.

Andrew: Yes, thanks for sending in the EA questions. Kevin, tell us about all the EA questions.

Kevin: I can tell you the most common question if you want me to.

Andrew: What? What is it?

Kevin: I got it about one hundred times. It’s “is the new game open world, or is it requiring you to go though step by step?”

[Show Close music starts]

Andrew: Oh, okay.

Kevin: Where you can fly around the entire world.

Andrew: I think it’s open world.

Kevin: We shall see when they answer.

Andrew: Just ask me. You can also Skype the name MuggleCast and leave a voice mail question, just keep your question under thirty seconds and eliminate as much background noise as possible.

Jamie: Keep it under three seconds from now on.

Andrew: Yeah. You can also e-mail us. You can just use our first name at staff dot mugglenet dot com, or use the feedback forum on MuggleCast.com. We also have a new community section on the new community website. You can visit our MySpace, Facebook, YouTube group, Frappr group, or even the MuggleCast fanlisting and forums that MuggleCastFans.net.

Jamie: Basically, what he’s trying to say is that there are so many ways to contact us that you’ve got no excuse at all to. Get writing, e-mailing…

Andrew: We’re everywhere.

Jamie: …phoning, sending, mailing.

Andrew: Yes. There was something else I was going to say.

Jamie: I know what you were going to say. You were going to say Dumbledore does not speak Parseltongue, the snakes just speak English out of sheer terror.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Jamie: Actually, Michael, 17, from Sydney said that.

Andrew: Very good Michael, 17, of Sydney. That does wrap up MuggleCast 59. We’ll be back with 60 – we’re turning 60 next week. Once again, I’m Andrew Sims.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Kevin: I’m Kevin Steck.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Andrew: [says in strange voice] Buh-bye!

Kevin: Goodbye.


This Week in Steck


Andrew: This week, we’re going to have fun with a new segment, and we’ll get back to all of our normal segments next week. We’re calling it “This Week in Steck.” It’s a rip off of “This Week in Tech,” and we know it, but it just works so well, that we have to do it. [laughs] So, we want you guys to send in your technical questions, but Jamie’s got a question for “This Week in Steck” this week that he hopes Kevin can answer for him. Is Jamie not here? [laughs]

Jamie: Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. Yeah, so I think we just made this so I could get my computer problem solved, you know? I think that’s it, Andrew. [laughs] Okay, Kevin, okay. I have a wireless network…

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: …in my dorm, okay, and I get a perfect signal, okay, on my laptop – perfect, excellent signal, but the Internet keeps dropping. It will die, and then, and then Google won’t load, and then every other website will load in like, eight minutes, and then it will crash, and AIM will crash, and then MSN won’t load. Why is this when I’ve got a perfect signal?

Kevin: Okay, where is the router located?

Jamie: It is downstairs.

Kevin: And where – so it’s passing through floors, I assume? How many?

Jamie: Yeah, but it’s a perfect signal. I get… One.

Kevin: Well, see, the thing is, is that all wireless signals run on a certain frequency…

Jamie: Oh, okay. I know it’s on Channel 11.

Kevin: So, you’re running on a 2.4 gigahertz frequency.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: So, anyone with a 2.4 gigahertz phone running on the same channel can…

Jamie: Is going to interfere. Should I change the channel, then?

Kevin: Yeah, actually, if you go to the lowest range, like, Channel One or Channel 11…

Jamie: Yeah, one.

Kevin: …or the maximum range, it tends to help.

Jamie: It’s on… I know it’s on Channel 11 now, so shall I change to one and see what happens?

Kevin: Yeah, try changing to one and see how it goes.

Andrew: Yay. [presses the easy button]

Jamie: Thank you, Kevin. That concludes “This Week in Steck” this week. I will tell everyone next week if my wireless network is performing perfectly.

Andrew: Oh, wonderful.

Jamie: I’m sure it will.

Andrew: That needs a second press. [presses the easy button] Too easy for Kevin Steck. What can’t he answer?

Kevin: I know.

Jamie: Oh, Andrew, Andrew, we have a rule in this house where, where, you can’t press the easy button unless something was easy.

Andrew: Oh, really? [laughs]

Jamie: And uh yeah. It’s like a grave, grave, you know, violation of rules if you press it when something hasn’t been easy.

Andrew: [laughs] Is it a hot item in your house?

Jamie: Huh?

Andrew: Is it a hot item in your house?

Jamie: Yeah! Yeah!

Andrew: Good.

Jamie: You like… And any person who presses it has got to explain why they pressed it, or why something was easy.

Andrew: [laughs] Oh, geez. Best five dollars I ever spent for you.

Kevin: Oh, wow.

———————–

Written by: Micah, Adrienne, Allison, Amanda, Briana, Jessica, Judy, Mandie, Margaret, Martina, Matthew, Megan, Samantha, Shannon and Shelly

Transcript #58

MuggleCast 58 Transcript


Show Intro


Andrew: Three solid weeks without MuggleCast and one new Podcast Award later, this is MuggleCast, Episode 58, for October 8th, 2006.

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Spy on Spartz


[Phone rings]

Emerson: Whatchu want?

Ben: Hey, what are you up to?

Emerson: I’m going to take a shower, that’s pretty much it right now.

Ben: Hey, you know how people always like to be redundant? You know what I’m saying? Like PIN number and ATM machine? Do you know why they do that? Why would they do that?

Emerson: Because they’re stupid?

Ben: Oh, come on! Is that all you could come up with?

Emerson: Okay, no, no, no. It sounds better as ATM machine. I say ATM machine too.

Ben: But come on.

Emerson: It’s definitely acceptable to say ATM machine.

Ben: Oh really? So, how’s Notre Dame this time of year? I’m curious.

Emerson: Notre Dame is glorious.

Ben: Glorious?

Emerson: The leaves are turning colors. The football team is winning, and…

Ben: Hey, did they – how’d they do against Michigan? I was curious.

Emerson: I beg your – what?

[Micah laughs]

Ben: Against Michigan.

[Micah laughs]

Emerson: How’d we do against Michigan? Against Michigan State, they won. They made a real comeback.

Ben: Right, right. What about Michigan the week before that?

Emerson: Well, what about Michigan? Everybody knows that game. And I blame the refs.

Ben: [laughs] You blame the refs? Well, we just thought we’d check in on you. We haven’t checked in on you in a few weeks.

Emerson: The refs gave them at least six touchdowns.

Ben: Mhm. We’re missing you, man. I mean, you haven’t – we haven’t seen you forever, we haven’t touched base with you in so long. We thought we’d Spy on Spartz.

Emerson: That’s cool. Ben, what did you think of the Michigan State game?

Ben: I enjoyed the Michigan State game. It was a great game.

Emerson: What’d you think about Michigan State?

Ben: What?

Emerson: What’d you think about Michigan State?

Ben: It sucked. [laughs]

Emerson: [laughs] Why did it suck?

Ben: Because it was huge. It was, like, bigger than – it was 85 Moundridges put together.

[Laura laughs]

Emerson: [laughs] That’s probably accurate.

Ben: Yeah. [laughs] Okay, Emerson, we’ll let you go. We just wanted to see what was up. We’ll see you later.

Emerson: [laughs] Bye.

Ben: So, ladies and gentlemen…

Andrew: Oh boy.

Ben: We just Spied on Spartz.


Welcome Back


Andrew [with show music in background]: Welcome back to the show, everyone! Oh, it’s been a while since I last heard your voices. Well…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] We don’t really talk…

Ben: [laughs] Yeah.

Andrew: No, we did talk. [laughs]

Ben: Big flub there, Andrew.

Andrew: Anyway, you know what I’m saying. Welcome back to the show. I’m Andrew.

Ben: I’m Ben.

Laura: I’m Laura.

Micah: And I’m Micah.

Andrew: This is the show where we bring you the latest in Harry Potter news, theories, discussions, and so much more, including that fantastic Spy on Spartz. What a way to open the show! How long have we been away? We even skipped an episode [laughs] because we’ve been away for so long.

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: Episode 57 is unreleased and might be unreleased for some time. However, it does exist, and it will go out eventually. And by eventually, I could mean five years. It’s going to be a heck of a show to edit together [laughs], but the point is – how’s everyone doing?

Ben: I’m good.

Laura: I’m great! I miss everybody, though. It’s so sad.

Ben: I miss everyone.

Andrew: I know!

Ben: I miss everyone too. Except Laura.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Ben: I’m just kidding. I miss Laura too. No, I’m really not that bad of a guy. These people know me in person.

Andrew: He really isn’t.

Ben: Even though often times I’m perceived as this grumpy teenager, it’s really not that way. I’m fun-loving. Sure, I make comments that cross the line occasionally…

Laura: [laughs] Occasionally?

[Micah laughs]

Ben: …and I can cause controversy. And I like to cause controversy from time to time, but hey! I’m still fun. I’m joyous. Yeah.

Andrew: It’s all… [laughs] You really are.

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: It’s that Subway, I’m telling you what. You must have had a Subway before we started recording. [laughs]

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: In case anyone is wondering, Jamie Lawrence is back in Durham where he’s settling down in college, and Eric Scull – well, we just didn’t invite him this week. The point is…

Ben: Well, we tried to invite Jamie. Jamie was originally slated to be on this week, but his internet – his internet conveniently…

Andrew: Didn’t work.

Ben: …fell out, yeah.

Andrew: Oh, we should – oh, there’s a good thing to insert at the end of the show! Me and Ben were trying to help him out with his thing, and we were recording his Skype because [laughs] he talks really slow. So, maybe we’ll include that at the end of the show. Actually, no. Maybe we’ll just tease you with it and never give it to you.

Ben: It was so funny because…

Andrew: I like that better.

Ben: …he sounded like – I don’t know, like he just woke up, or he took 100 pain-killers and he could barely talk. He was slow.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: It sounded like he was slurring his speech. It was like [speaks very slowly] Beeeeennnnnnnn…

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah.

Ben: It was hilarious.

Andrew: We’ll include a quick sample out of that at the end of the show this week. All right, stop recording. Well, we have a fantastic show for everyone this week – but before we do anything else, Micah Tannenbaum is standing by in the MuggleCast news center with the past week’s top Harry Potter news stories.


News


Micah: The winners of this year’s SyFy Genre Awards were announced last week; and Goblet of Fire won the Best Movie award, Emma Watson took Best Actress and Best Young Actor, while Dan Radcliffe won Best Actor and was the runner-up for Best Young Actor. Try saying that five times fast.

Speaking of the fourth film, HBO will begin airing Goblet of Fire on November 19th at 7 PM EST. It will then replay numerous times through the end of the month. A “making of” special will also air through the entire month, starting on November 7th at 6:45 AM EST.

In a new interview, Julie Walters, the Mrs. Weasley actress, discusses Order of the Phoenix director David Yates and explains how he captures the emotional depth of the book and the atmosphere he creates on-set.

Wrapping up movie news, Toby Jones, the man who voiced Dobby in the second Potter flick, recently told MTV that the ex-house-elf won’t be making an appearance in Order of the Phoenix, but Kreacher will.

As part of Banned Books Week, held last week to raise awareness of books that have been challenged in communities across the US, the American Library Association asked 5,000 people what their favorite banned book was. Unsurprisingly, the Potter series came out on top. To Kill A Mockingbird and James and the Giant Peach came in second and third place, respectively. What’s so bad about James and the Giant…?

While we’re on the topic of banning – as we reported previously, the Georgian mother, Laura Mallory, who campaigned for the Harry Potter books to be removed from Gwinnett County school libraries [in a southern accent] because fundamentally they “promote and glorify witchcraft”, is back at it again. After the Gwinnett Board of Education ruled the books would remain on shelves, Mallory, unsatisfied with the outcome, appealed the decision in a second hearing earlier this week. Mallory rehashed her previous points regarding why the books should go, saying “Witchcraft is being mainstreamed to our kids today but people are not aware of it. They think these books are fantasies but Wicca is a real recognized religion.” But everyone, don’t worry. It’s okay. I hear Laura is actually headed down there right now to set her straight.

On a more positive note, we’re proud to announce that MuggleCast won the top prize at the 2006 Podcast Awards in Ontario, California. The People’s Choice category was awarded to us after receiving over 100,000 votes from listeners and fans. Thanks to everyone who provided their support through the entire voting process, including our friends at PotterCast who we teamed up with! They received their award for Best Entertainment podcast.

Also, if you weren’t able to join us out in the Borders in Westwood for our live show in Los Angeles, California, the show is now available for download, and a transcript will be posted shortly.

Finally, JK Rowling has been updating her site quite a bit lately. I wonder why that is… Hmmm…

That’s all the new for this October 7th, 2006 edition of MuggleCast. Back to the show.

Andrew: Okay, thank you, Micah…

Ben: [Impersonating Micah] Thanks, Andrew.

Micah: Oh, oh. Sorry, sorry.

Andrew: [laughs] Hey, Micah…

Micah: Oh, you’re welcome.

Andrew: I have a funny story.

Micah: Okay?

Andrew: [laughs] Jamie calls you Mic-er. What do you think of that? It’s pretty funny, isn’t it? [laughs]

Micah: Yeah well, Jamie’s British. So, we all have our faults.

Ben: Oh!

Andrew: Hey, we have a MySpace – [laughs] that was – that’s pretty bad.

Ben: Hey people.

[Andrew laughs]

Micah: I’m just kidding. Don’t send me massive amounts of e-mail.

[Andrew laughs]

Andrew: Hey everyone…

Micah: I going to get a thous…

Andrew: Okay, you’re done. You’re done, Micah. Thank you.

Micah: Sorry.

Andrew: Ummm…[laughs]

[Micah laughs]


MuggleCast MySpace and Facebook


Andrew: Don’t forget, everyone, we have a MuggleCast MySpace now. Whether you want to admit it or not, you have a MySpace and you can visit ours at myspace.com/MuggleCastFans. Become our friend and then help spread the word about MuggleCast because we’re trying to get the word out more besides – we just promote it on MuggleNet – it’s started to spread further.

Ben: Mhm. We’re going to take over the world.

Andrew: Because, about one fifth of the world visits MuggleNet. But, what about the other four-fifths? Where do they go? MySpace. So, that’s why we are on MySpace. And Facebook! We also have a Facebook so just do a search for MuggleCast and we should show up there – as a group.

Ben: And if you can’t find the MuggleCast Facebook, you can add me as your friend and then I can get it through me, so…

Andrew: [laughs] Hmm. That sounds suspicious.

Ben: [Laughs] Yeah. I need more Facebook friends.

Andrew: It almost doesn’t sound like you’re having a competition with Jamie to see who can get more Facebook friends.

Ben: No, never. Never, never.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Ben Schoen. Remember the name.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: S-C-H-O-E-N

Andrew: [laughs] Oh, it’s wonderful to be back recording again.


California Podcast


Ben: So, hey, Andrew.

Andrew: Yes, Ben?

Ben: What did you think of California – Podcast?

Andrew: It was super! Thanks for asking, Ben!

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: I thought it was fun too. I mean, it was a great time.

Andrew: Yeah it was. There was about 300 people that showed up.

Laura: It was very intimate.

Andrew: And…

Laura: That’s what I liked about it.

Andrew: Was it? Yeah, it was a different setting wasn’t it?

Laura: Mhm.

Andrew: We were on the second floor – it was this room – it was a circular room. And there were only about a little under a hundred seats and there was a lot of people standing around the outside, but it was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fan interaction too. So, it was good.

Ben: Yeah, I liked it a lot too.


Subway Confrontation


Ben: And, if you guys don’t remember, this was the day that I had the 36 inches of Subway along with the pizza. And, well, I’d just like to clear something up because earlier this week I got an e-mail from angry@disgusted.com.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: Way to use your real email address…

Ben: Yeah, yeah.

Andrew:…in case we wanted to contact you back with a legit answer.

Ben: And here’s what they said: “I always liked you guys a lot, but you have gotten so pathetic. Well, one of you anyway…”

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: “That I think I may just listen to Leaky from now on.” Who’d want to do that?

Andrew: Oooh!

Ben: “Ben keeps begging people to send him Subway cards. That itself is disgusting because you’ve gone to like New York and LA in the last six months while people listening sit at home and even if we have the money, we have to work to get it and you ask us to send you stuff which you don’t even sound like you appreciate unless it is money or gift cards, something like that. Only Laura ever sounds like she cares that people take the time to make her something that didn’t cost money.”

Laura: Awww.

Ben: Good job, Laura. “Talking about your mailbox and asking for people to give you things is totally conceited anyway. But then, after talking about the battle against childhood obesity – the famous one – so people will send him free stuff, Ben goes and is bragging about how he ate three foot long subs at once. What a jerk. There are kids in the world who don’t have any food. There are kids in America who don’t [pause] and there are kids who seriously battle weight problems. That is so insulting to both groups. Better to ask people to send money to buy food for people in Darfur or someplace where children are starving than to feed Ben’s face. I listen to hear about Harry Potter, not to hear people who just went to Disneyworld and WB Studios and whatever – beg me to send them cards to get free food so they can act like a hog. It is really sad that Ben behaves like this and the rest of you, like Jamie, encourage it and think it is funny. You may all be older than me, but you sure don’t act like it. You should all apologize, especially Ben. And, you should give the cards to a homeless shelter or something to feed people who really are hungry. You may have just won a People’s Choice Award and I’m sorry now that I voted for you, but you are not my choice any longer.”

Andrew: Oooh. Awww. Awww. That hurts. That hurts, disappointed@disgusted, whatever.

Ben: Yeah, I just have a few things to say about this. First of all, I don’t remember the last time – an episode where I asked for Subway gift cards. They kind of just kept coming and I thank people for them, whatever. I mean, you don’t have to send them, it’s not like you’re obligated to. If you feel that Darfur or one of those other situations is something better to send your money to, go ahead and do that. I mean, I’m not saying you’re obligated to send your money to me. [laughs] I mean…

Laura: OperationSudan.org.

Ben: Yeah, or…

Laura: Go there.

Ben: …SaveDarfur.com or whatever it is. You don’t have to send anything to me. I mean, actually from now on, send your money to Darfur. I don’t need it. I can buy my own Subway.

Andrew: Oh, wonderful, wonderful.

Ben: Second of all, I don’t feel it’s conceited for us to ask things because people like to send us stuff. I mean, it’s not like we’re constantly asking for things and say “hey, send whatever to our P.O. Box” – it’s not arrogant. Thirdly, the battle against childhood obesity – she brought up how it’s pathetic that I went and ate 36 inches of Subway – actually, when I was eating the 36 inches of Subway, I thought of this. First of all, I want everyone to know that none of the Subway gift cards went towards purchasing that 36 inches. All that money came out of my own pocket – I knew that would be unethical of sorts. Secondly, I’ve already lost weight and I’m still health conscious. It’s not like I go out eating 36 inches of Subway every day because then I would be the posterhood child for childhood obesity – the posterhood? [laughs] The poster child for childhood obesity.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Another thing is they mention how I should give these Subway gift cards to a homeless shelter. Well, coincidentally enough, one night we were in Los Angeles, we stayed downtown and there was a Subway right around the corner. Anyways, we went down around the corner to the Subway, Andrew and I did, and on the way back we got approached by a homeless person who said, “Guys, I am very hungry right now. I have diabetes. I really need to eat something, it’s absolutely necessary, or else I’m going to have to go to the hospital, I don’t have the money for this.” And you know I didn’t have any cash on me so what did I do? Andrew, tell them what I did.

Andrew: You gave that homeless man a Subway gift card.

Ben: Worth ten dollars.

Andrew: Ten dollars.

Ben: I gave this homeless man this ten dollar Subway gift card. So, I don’t think it’s appropriate to accuse me of being undeserving and arrogant and all that when my intentions are good.

Andrew: Yep.

Ben: So, from now on, from now on don’t send me Subway gift cards. Put your money towards Sudan or whatever. I mean, you never had to do it in the first place; it’s always just been an option. So, I ask you from now on don’t send me Subway gift cards, send the money to a better cause, save darfur dot org.

Andrew: Yeah, guys we’re just having fun. We’re not…

Laura: Very charitable.


iPod Issues


Andrew: We’re not demanding anything. We’re just messing around trying to have some fun. So, anyway, we wanted to address some podcast/iPod troubles that have been coming in. We’ve been getting a lot of complaints lately that MuggleCast screws up your iPods, and this isn’t true it’s actually a problem that occurred with the latest iPod software update. What’s been happening is, for some reason, when you put – this doesn’t happen with everyone’s iPods – but when you put podcast on your iPod, for some reason they freeze and restart or something like that. Luckily, I didn’t have the problem, but a couple people did so we’ve been getting a lot of emails. I just wanted to make it clear it’s not MuggleCast screwing up your iPod, it’s Apple. Blame them.


The People’s Choice


Okay, also and of course the big story of the week. Well, we’ve been off a couple of weeks. But it’s a big story and we want to talk about it.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Yeah, sorry about that.

Andrew: We apologize, its rough coming back from a trip and then trying to put a show together because – especially during the school year because we all, you know, we all had a lot of school work to make up and business to attend to outside of the podcast. So, anyway, MuggleCast did win the People’s Choice Award at the 2006 Podcast Awards, back on September 29th.

Ben: Seems like ages ago.

Andrew: We were all there. Yeah, it was only like a week – actually it was a week ago today.

Ben: Today, right now as we record this show.

Laura: Mhm.

Andrew: We record on Friday night. This is what we do on Friday night guys.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: We record MuggleCast. [laughs]

Ben: We don’t have friends. We don’t friends? Friends, what are those?

Andrew: Yeah. What are friends? Frynds? What?

[Laura, Ben and Andrew laugh]

Andrew: So, yeah we… Yeah, so we won the Podcast Award. It was a great event, we had a lot of fun. What did you guys think of it?

Ben: I thought it was nice. I mean it was good to go around and meet other people who are involved in podcasting and all that so, yeah I’m grateful we had the opportunity to do that. If course next year we won’t be eligible. So, thanks to all the people who voted for us, Andrew had a chance to speak with the person who conducted the – pretty much the whole organizer of the event afterwards, and he pretty much told us that we crushed everybody. So, that’s thanks to you guys.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Yeah. He was blown away, yeah.

Ben: He was so surprised that Harry Potter could, you know, attract so many people and so many people would vote for us. So yeah, good job everybody.

Andrew: Right.

Laura: It was really great because there were tons of other very, very popular shows there and I had people coming up to me saying, “You’re on MuggleCast.” And they knew who we were, which was just – it was so flattering because it was like, “Wow, you know, you’re a pretty big show and here you are shaking my hand.” So, it was just great to go and get to see all these different people.

Andrew: It was great meeting all the new podcast – well not new, it was great meeting all the podcasters. I met Don and Drew from the Don and Drew Show and my buds Patrick and Adam from the Nobody Likes Onions.

[Micah laughs]

Ben: That is a good show.

Andrew: The Leo Laporte.

Ben: Yeah we met Leo. Andrew and I met Leo. We shook…

Andrew: Jamie was there, too.

Ben: Yeah. Jamie was there, too. We shook his hand. We had a good time with Leo.

Micah: Wasn’t there also…

Ben: He told us he was very impressed with what we are doing.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: The Podcaster of the Year, people. He loves us.

Micah: Wasn’t there also a priest from the Vatican?

Laura: Yeah, that was pretty cool.

Ben and

Andrew: The Catholic Insider.

Ben: It’s actually the number two search result if you search for Harry Potter podcast.

Laura: Really?

Andrew: Yeah, because he does some Harry Potter stuff from time to time. Very good. So, that was the Podcast Awards. Thanks all the…

Micah: They need to work on seating for next year.

Andrew: Seating didn’t go very well but… We walked in and there were like five seats left.

Ben: So…

Andrew: Let’s put it this way, it was so popular…

Ben: So, what we did was, I grabbed a chair, Andrew sat on my lap.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Jamie sat on his, Kevin sat on his and then Laura was on the very top.

[Andrew laughs]


Order of the Phoenix California Video Game Podcast


Andrew: Before we get to our main discussion, we want to let everyone know that we will, in I guess like three or four weeks, have a special episode of MuggleCast that focuses around the Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix video game, where we will be speaking with producers of the fifth video game from Electronic Arts. It’s going to be a nerdfest galore, yay! Yay, Kevin!

Ben: Kevin, Kevin would definitely be excited about that.

Andrew: So, we need your help, this is why we are bringing it up on the show. We want you guys to send in your questions that you have about the Order of the Phoenix video game to 1-218-20-MAGIC. Kevin is going to have a super time going through all the voice mails and picking out some questions for them. We’re going to choose like 15 to 20 questions, to pose to them, and then you’ll hear their answers on the show. And – what was I going to say? Oh, we’ll put some links to some information about the video game on MuggleCast.com and also MuggleNet will be promoting it there too, so that you guys can read up more about the game and then get some questions for them. We got a little preview of this game when me, Melissa and John hit up the Order of the Phoenix set. It’s looking like a great game, it’s very interactive, you can go around the entire school, do what you want, mess around. So, I am sure everyone will have a lot of questions for them. And the EA guys are really cool. So, for more information visit MuggleCast.com.


Harry Potter Jeopardy!


Ben: Also, wasn’t Harry Potter on Jeopardy! the other day?

Laura: Oh yeah!

Andrew: Yes it was, Ben.

Laura: It was!

Ben: Actually, someone sent me in the questions. They were completely lame, oh my gosh! Let me read a few of them to you. Because you guys all know how Jeopardy works, they give you the answer and you have to say the question, and it says, “In this sport Harry plays the position of Seeker.” Okay, seriously you have to be joking.

Laura: Are you kidding?

Andrew: Oh.

Ben: Yeah, it says, “A half-giant, he’s the game-keeper of Hogwarts.”

Andrew: Who is Umbridge?

Ben: Hagrid [uses silly voice]. “Ron and Harry use this unusual transport to get to Hogwarts for their second year.” Then…

[Laura laughs]

Ben: …”Harry’s nemesis, this member of Slytherin, has a dad named Lucius who is a supporter of Voldemort.” Then, “Any cat could tell you that she teaches Transfiguration magic at Hogwarts.”

Andrew: [in goofy voice] Whoa, ho, ho.

Ben: Yep. These are the exact questions.

Laura: Those were…

Ben: They appeared on the cards, but yeah that’s…

Laura: Some really difficult questions.

Andrew: Little too easy.

Ben: Yeah I know, but I guess if it was – not everyone’s read Harry Potter.

Andrew: It was like Teen Week, so I think that’s why they asked.


W.O.M.B.A.T.S.


Laura: Yeah. Jo’s WOMBATS were nothing next to those questions, huh?

Andrew and Ben: [together] Speaking of WOMBATS.

Ben: Yeah, good transition there.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: So, how did everyone do on their WOMBATS?

Ben: Hey Andrew, Andrew. How’d you do on your WOMBATS? Just curious.

Andrew: Oh, I did great. I got a nothing, because I didn’t take it.

Ben: Awww.

Laura: Mhm.

Micah: Yeah, neither did I.

Ben: Well, you know, we’re sorry excuses for Harry Potter fans. I can feel the hate mail coming already, and I can hear all of you booing us right now because we didn’t take the WOMBATS.

Andrew: Well, we sort of have valid excuses.

Laura: You know what? I can proudly say that despite being in Los Angeles – see that’s these guys’ excuse. They’re saying, “Well, we were in LA. We were too busy to take it.”

Andrew: We were distracted.

Laura: I took my WOMBATS and I got an Exceeds Expectations. Thank you very much.

Andrew: Well, very good. Very good. What was the second round like? Was it any harder than the first round?

Laura: You know what? I honestly thought that the first one was harder.

Andrew: Oh.

Laura: I got an Acceptable the first time, and I thought the questions were a lot more difficult. But at the same time, you really had to be paying attention to the books to do well on this, I think.

Andrew: Did this second round focus around certain style of questions? Or what?

Laura: Ummm.

Andrew: What were some of the questions?

Laura: God, let me remember. It had some stuff about magical creatures, like the first one. There was actually a question that it was all about Muggles; like this one section was about them. And one of the questions, I specifically remember, said, “Muggles are” and it had all of these little checkboxes with, like, opinions below it. And one of them said…

Andrew: Like ignorant, in danger…

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: …inferior to wizards, insensitive to their surroundings, interesting, or irritating facts of like for example?

Laura: Yeah.

[Ben and Laura laugh]

Laura: I liked irritating facts of life, but I didn’t choose that one.

Andrew: Wait, are there correct answers for these?

Ben: I missed out on taking the WOMBATS the first time, so I’m still disappointed in myself.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Awww, geez.

Ben: Because you never know when their going to close the door and I was like, “Oh, I’m going to take the WOMBATS.” Then I log on to MuggleNet and it says, “The door is now closed.” Like, noooo!

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah.


Micah Says, The Door Will Open…On Halloween!


Laura: Micah, do you think you could get Jo to open the door back up?

Ben: Come on Micah.

Micah: Yeah, yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Let’s hear it.

Micah: I’m telling you.

Andrew: Do it.

Micah: October 31st she is going to reveal the title of Book Seven. I’m not joking about that.

Andrew: All right.

Ben: Are you pretty sure about that Micah?

Andrew: Oh Micah, I’m getting excited now.

Ben: Micah, do you have some kind of inside source?

Micah: You know, I think it would be really creepy if the night of the show I had said, “Oh she’s going to open the door later tonight.”

[Laura laughs]

Micah: And then we all went back and…


Wake Up Call


Micah: Well, you guys have an interesting story. Didn’t you guys get woken up?

Laura: Oh yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Yeah.

Micah: At five or six in the morning.

Andrew: That’s a lame story.

Ben: That’s a great story. Okay.

Andrew: Go ahead, tell the story.

Ben: Okay. I’ll tell it. I’ll tell it. It was awesome.

Andrew: [laughs] I can’t stand it.

Ben: Okay.

Andrew: See, now here’s the thing, let me just say something first. If you listened to PotterCast earlier this week, they told like a completely different version of this story. [laughs]

Ben: Oh, did they really?

Andrew: [laughs] That doesn’t make sense at all, but anyway go ahead.

Ben: Okay, here’s what really happened. It was about…

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: It was probably like 9 AM. Wouldn’t you say?

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: It was about 9 AM and I get a knock at the door.

Andrew: We’re in LA.

Ben: We’re in Los Angeles; Andrew and I in one bed and Jamie and someone else was in another. Anyways I get a knock at the door, and I go to the door and I’m like, “Who could this be? Who’s knocking at the door?” I open it up and Sue, Sue Upton from TLC, standing at the door saying, “Ben! Ben! Oh my God! Ben! The door’s open! The door’s open!”

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: And I’m like, “What? What door’s open? I know the door’s open.” And then she said, “No, JKRowling.com. The door is open.” And apparently she had some text message notification service so when she updated her site, the door…

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: It sent her a text message or something, or someone called her. Something like that. Anyways, I go back to…I wasn’t about to post news, because I was so tired. So I go back to the bed and I start prodding Andrew. I’m like, “Andrew, get up. Andrew come on. The doors open, Andrew.” And he rolls over to me, he’s like, “No, it’s not. She wasn’t telling the truth.” I was like, “Oh yes, Andrew. It was a big conspiracy. Melissa and Sue are sitting over there…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: No! I didn’t say that.

Ben: …plotting against us.”

Andrew: [laughs] Well, I did say that.

Ben: It was like, “Yeah. They’re sitting over there plotting against us. Like, oh, we can go wake him up and get him out of bed and get him all riled up if we tell him the doors open.”

Andrew: Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. I was still sleeping. I didn’t know Sue came to the door, so…

Ben: Yeah. It’s classic me just to mess with him like I’d say something like…

Andrew: It is.

Ben: “Oh yeah. Sue came to the door, and she wants you to get up and post about it.” But, in reality…

Andrew: So, Ben kept bugging me.

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: It got to the point where I was ready to throw him through the window. [laughs]

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: I was so annoyed. [laughs]

Ben: I was like, “Come on just post it. Post it now.” Because, you know, of course TLC waited about two-and-a-half hours until after they’d posted it to come get us up you know.

[Andrew laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] And so then I went on MuggleNet to see if Ciaran posted it, and he didn’t. So I went and I checked out, like, the details on how to open it up and it was so much. I was just like, “Oh, forget this. I’m going back to bed.” [laughs]

Ben: So, we messaged Ciaran. He’s like, “Ciaran, post it.” And he gladly obliged, but yeah. It was a mess.

Andrew: It was funny.

Ben: It was pretty funny. [laughs]

Andrew: [laughs] So, there’s our story. I was so annoyed with you. No one wake me in the morning.

Micah: But you guys are happy with these results, right? I mean, stuff is happening at least.

Andrew: What results? Your results?

Micah: She’s updating the site.

Andrew: Micah Tan the Anchorman gets results. Oh yeah. It’s all because of you Micah.

Ben: She’s scared of you, dude.

Micah: It’s funny. Somebody in Los Angeles, when were at the podcast, gave me a shirt that says, “Jo updated her site because I told her to.”

Ben: That’s awesome.

Andrew: Nice.

[Laura laughs]

Micah: So, thank you to whoever gave that to me.

Andrew: So Micah, that is your prediction? October 31st we’re going to see something?

Micah: October 31st. I’m going to stick with the title. I know she’s going to do an update, but I’m going to go big with it. I’m going to say she’s going to reveal the title.

Ben: No, Micah, Micah. You don’t say….

Laura: And what are you putting on the line here? What if you’re wrong?

Andrew: Yeah. You have to do something if you’re wrong.

Micah: Well, I’m going to look pretty stupid. [laughs]

Ben: Hold on, Micah, you have to say it with confidence. You have to say, “The release date…” Yeah. “The title will be released October 31st.”

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: No question about it, okay?

Micah: Okay. Okay.

Andrew: Good, do it.

Micah: The title of Book Seven will be…

Andrew: No, more, more… No, no, more, more force.

Ben: Come on, Micah.

Andrew: Kind of angry.

Ben: You have to…

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: …lay down the – throw down the law here.

Micah: Well, it doesn’t need to be angry though, it just has to be definitive.

Andrew: Yeah, well I know. It just has to be forceful. It has be like you’re in control.

[Laura laughs]

Micah: The title of Book Seven will be released on October 31st.

Ben: Are you sure, Micah?

Micah: Yeah! 100 percent.

Ben: 100 percent.

Andrew: [laughs] Whoa! 100 percent.

Ben: Oh guys, you heard it here first.

Andrew: I don’t know who you’re talking to. Yeah.

Ben: Guys, imagine if the title of it really is released, how much praise we’re going to get, how much praise Micah is going to get?

Andrew: Yeah. Micah Tan gets results.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Well, because she’s still deciding between two titles, so it’s kind of funny. She came up with the second title in New York City while she was taking a shower. I’ll tell you what, that New York City water really gets ya movin’. [laughs]

Micah: Watch, she’ll do it on November 1st just to spite me.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah. That would really stink, wouldn’t it?


Main Discussion: The Veil


Andrew: Well, let’s talk some Harry Potter now, guys. This week we’re going to talk about the Department of Mysteries but, more specifically, the Veil.


Connections Between the Veil and Thestrals


Laura: Now, Micah, you told me that you got an interesting e-mail about this from a listener talking about what they thought the Veil was.

Micah: Yeah, I’m going credit them, too. Dana, 14 of Ohio, sent in a message saying, “On Episode 56 you put out the theory that Harry could get past the Veil using his Invisibility Cloak. That got me thinking of some way the two could be connected. I thought that maybe the Veil itself was made of the same material as the cloak. So, when people pass through, they don’t die, they just become invisible. That can be why Harry and Luna can still hear the voices.” And they were just wondering what they thought and, of course, they love the show.

Laura: Well, we all know that the Invisibility Cloak is made out of the fur from a Demiguise, which we all know very well, because of a certain trivia contest in Las Vegas.

Ben: You mean the one that we won?

Laura: Yeah, that one!

Andrew: Yeah, that one.

Laura: [laughs] Now, I was going through Order of the Phoenix and Sorcerer’s Stone, and I looked at the descriptions for both of them and the Invisibility Cloak is described as being fluid, laying on the floor and gleaming folds, shining like water woven into material. Now when you look at the description for the Veil, it’s described as being tattered, rippling, ragged. I got the impression of the Veil that it was just a veil. It wasn’t woven out of any kind of creature’s fur, not to mention it’s black. The Invisibility Cloak was described as being silvery-gray. So what do you think about that, Micah? I just don’t think that it could be made out of the same material. It’s a good theory, though.

Micah: Yeah, it’s definitely a good theory. Its just one of those things that you have to sort of take into consideration and, you know, sort of analyze.

Laura: Mhm.

Micah: But based upon the descriptions that you just went over, it’s probably not, but I mean there’s different forms of material – of the same material rather – you just can’t rule it out because they’re different colors.

Laura: Mhm.

Andrew: There still has to be something more to the Veil, though, because… Well, we’ll get into this later on, obviously, there has to be, but – ’cause, why would Harry and Luna only be able to hear voices beyond it? If you’re trying to relate it to the Invisibility Cloak…

Laura: That’s interesting, though, Andrew, because…

Andrew: …because they’ve both seen death.

Ben: The Thestrals.

Laura: Andrew because – sorry, Ben.

Ben: I’m saying, like, the Thestrals. You had to see someone die in order to actually see the Thestrals.

Andrew: Right.

Ben: Maybe it has something to do with that.

Laura: But you know what? Do you guys think that Jo is kind of pulling a fast one on us here? Kind of assuming that we will think that the Veil is all about death because, if you remember, it wasn’t just Harry and Luna, it was Neville and Ginny, too. It said that they were both staring at the Veil entranced. Ron and Hermione were the only ones who weren’t affected by it. And we know that Harry, Luna, and Neville have all witnessed death but we don’t know about Ginny. When would she have witnessed a death?

Micah: When did Neville witness a death?

Andrew: Well, Ginny was in the Chamber of Secrets, so maybe something happened in there.

Ben: Right, but I don’t know if there was any death going on there.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Are we sure that death has a direct connection to this, though?

Laura: That’s what I’m saying, though. I’m saying that because of Ginny, there has to be some sort of different connection between those four people. Otherwise, Ginny would have had to have seen a death.

Andrew: She almost saw a death in Chamber of Secrets when Harry almost died.

Laura: But he didn’t die.

Andrew: He almost died.

Laura: But that doesn’t count.

Ben: But that’s different, its like…

Laura: “Almost” only counts in Horseshoes and hand-grenades. [laughs]

Ben: Yeah. “I almost won a million dollars.” Doesn’t mean you’re a millionaire.

Laura: But if someone close to Ginny died, wouldn’t the chances be that that person was close to Ron, too?

Micah: Yeah, what about Neville, though? Who did he witness?

Laura: His Grandfather, I think?

Micah: Oh, okay. I just wasn’t sure.

Laura: I remember during their Care of Magical Creatures lesson, they were looking at the Thestrals and Hagrid asked him who he’d seen die.

Micah: Oh, okay.


Was the Ministry Built Around the Veil?

Laura: But it just – there’s something about it that doesn’t seen natural. Like, when you think about it, there’s no actual archway to the afterlife. It’s not like, for instance, they go into the Department of Mysteries and there’s this veil there. It’s not like you walk into the White House and there is some sort of veil leading you to death. [laughs] It just seems bizarre to me that this would be here. Why did… Do you guys think that the Ministry built this thing, or…

Ben: Well, of course, I mean, it’s not like it’s going to just appear out of nowhere. If it’s a veil…

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Well, here’s the thing. And I hate talking about the movies because to me it sounds arrogant because I’m like, “I saw the set! Blah blah blah.”

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: But, they had an artist’s rendering of the Veil on the set and we talked about this at the Leaky Mug, this is the only reason I’m bringing it up, W.B. [laughs] I’m not, you know, we’re not going to spill all the details here but, from the artist’s rendering, you can tell that it looks like the Ministry was built around it. That Veil was connected to the rock, this, this… It’s hard to explain because… I was really surprised by it, because it wasn’t like you’re traditional veil. It looked very – the whole thing looked very old and tattered and looked… It was crooked and it was all weird, but it definitely looked like the Ministry was built around it. Because it was connected to the rock. The Veil was connected to the rock. The ground.

Micah: And you have to wonder what kind of input J.K. Rowling has when those things are created.

Ben: Well, I remember people saying that with the death scene – I mean, not the death scene, but at the beginning of Sorcerer’s Stone in the movie where – like where Voldemort comes into Harry’s house and he kills his parents or whatever. You see like. there’s just this scene at the beginning. You know what I’m talking about.

Laura: Mhm.

Ben: Apparently, J.K. Rowling had a say in that. It was like very specific about what went on.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: So, it could be likely that Jo said, “Yeah, the Veil is built – the Ministry was built around the Veil,” you know. But to me, to me, what I think that the Veil is just a place where, like, I don’t know, where they study death, you know? I’ve heard that theory quite a bit. And it makes sense because…

Andrew: It’s not a theory. Jo actually said that.

Ben: Oh, did she really?

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Well, then, yeah. Then…

Andrew: In the interview with Emerson and Melissa.

Ben: Sorry, I feel so out of the loop.

Andrew: Melissa said, “Was it used as an execution chamber or just studying?” And J.K. Rowling said, “No, it’s just studying. The Department of Mysteries is all about studying. They study the mind, the universe, death, and in this case, where the Veil is was the Death Room,” or something.

Laura: Mhm.

Andrew: It’s called the Death Room or something like that.


The Veil is the Gateway to…?


Laura: Now, if we’re assuming that the Ministry was built around this veil, this archway, what is it about it that they’re trying to keep so secret? Because I don’t really think that we can assume – I’ve seen a lot of people assuming that when you die in the wizarding world, you go beyond the Veil. And I don’t think that’s so, because if that were the case, then the Veil would be common knowledge. Like people would think of it as like going to Heaven or doing, you know, whatever a specific person’s religion…

Ben: Yeah, something, something has to be special about the Veil itself for that to be in the Department of Mysteries. Like, what’s so mysterious about it – when you go through the Veil, is it really the afterlife you’re going to? Because I mean, does it make sense for them to hide it then? I mean, what’s the big deal? Why is it hidden? What’s so secretive about it?

Laura: Mhm. And…

Andrew: Well, it has to be protected because then anyone can just jump
through it and kill themselves.

Ben: Right, but you can kill yourself in a multitude of ways. It’s like
saying we should get rid of all shotguns…

Andrew: But that way is so easy.

Ben: …so people can’t kill themselves.

Andrew: I mean, also, the thing is, they were transfixed by it. They were
attracted to it. It’s not just that you can so easily die by walking through it, but you can also, inadvertently, become attracted to it. It pulls you in.

Laura: Yeah. So, do you guys think it’s evil?

Andrew: How can it be evil?

Laura: Because if it – well, if it causes death. Harry said that – hang on,
I’ve got the quote here. It says, “Harry felt a very strong inclination to
climb up on the dais and walk through it.” Now, if it causes death and it
makes you want to walk through it, I’m going to assume that it’s not a good
thing.

Andrew: I don’t know, it’s like a cat. When it looks at something shiny it
wants to touch it.

Laura: Okay, but a cat doesn’t die when it touches something shiny.

[Micah, Ben and Laura laugh]

Andrew: Well, Harry doesn’t know that…

Micah: If it’s a blender it does.

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: Harry doesn’t know if you walk through it you’re going to die. So,
of course you might want to go up to it and be like, “Whoa, what’s this?”

Laura: Yeah, but still, if it kills you – if it draws you in and unexpectedly kills you – it’s kind of evil, isn’t it?

Andrew: Right, well, right.

Micah: I think he raised…

Andrew: Yes, but you’re coming to a conclusion that it draws you in. I mean
you could just… I see what you’re saying, but I wouldn’t consider it…

Ben: I mean it’s natural, it’s natural…

Andrew: [laughs] …evil. It’s a thing. That’s like calling a tree evil.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: Yeah, okay. Hold on, if you see a… No, hold on a second. If you see a…

Andrew: [laughs] “You’re trying to kill me! You’re not putting out enough oxygen!”

[Laura laughs]

Ben: If you see, if you see a hole in the wall…

Andrew: Mhm.

Ben: …you’re automatically going to be intrigued by it, interested by it…

Andrew: Right.

Ben: …regardless of whether what’s on the – you want to figure out what’s on the other side. I mean, the reason that Sirius fell through the Veil wasn’t because, you know, he was like, “Oh my gosh, this is so interesting.” It was because he got knocked back into it by Bellatrix.

Laura: Yeah, look. Listen to this. Order of the Phoenix, chapter 34
pg. 775, says, “On the other side Ginny and Neville were staring,
apparently entranced at the veil, too.”

Ben: Was this after Sirius died?

Laura: No this was before.

Andrew: No, it was before.

Laura: Whenever they were exploring. And these four: Harry, Luna, Neville, and Ginny were all entranced by it, while Ron and Hermione were saying, “Come on, you guys, I can’t hear anything, let’s go.”

Andrew: Mhm.

Ben: Well, then it probably has to relate with seeing death, then.

Laura: Well then, doesn’t that beg the question, who has Ginny seen die?

Micah: The Basilisk.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: What about Tom Riddle?

Micah: Yeah.

Ben: Never thought of that.

Laura: He didn’t die, though. He wasn’t…

Ben: Yeah, he did. I mean, depends what you classify as dying.

Laura: …a person. He was a piece of a soul, he was shattered.

Ben: I guess that’s true.

Laura: And I’ve gotten the impression from Jo that whenever you, you know,
you break your soul up like that, you don’t count as being alive anymore. Hagrid even said it, “he’s not even alive.”

Ben: Oh, he’s alive, but just…

Laura: He just exists.

Ben: He’s a fragment of what he used to be.

[Micah laughs]

Ben: But something…

Micah: But to go…

Ben: Go ahead, Micah.

Micah: I just wanted to go back to what you said before about the Veil being the – is it the only barrier between life and death? It’s interesting because if you think that it is, then that drawing that Andrew brought up kind of makes more sense because, then, if that is the only passageway, the Ministry, it makes sense for it to be built around it.

Laura: Mhm.

Micah: But if it’s not, if there is some other passageway out there it kind of – you want to know, how did it get there?

Ben: Well, it’s…

Micah: How did it get to the Ministry?

Ben: Right. Well, is it possible that the Veil could be, like where, you know, right now if I died, it’s only – I can’t come back from being dead. Do you understand what I’m saying?

Laura: Mhm.

Ben: So, is it possible, if Harry goes to the
Veil, tosses a rope down there, “Sirius! Sirius!”

[Micah laughs]

Ben: Just pull him on out.

Laura: But the only…

Ben: No, no, not that, really. I mean, is it possible for Sirius to return,
since the way that he died was going through the Veil? If you know what I’m
saying.

Laura: I don’t think so. Because if you look at the way the Veil is
described, it’s not like it’s a veil leading into another room. Harry went
around and looked at the other side of it. It was literally like he fell
through that archway and disappeared.

Ben: But, is the Veil a one way street or is it a…

Andrew: It’s got to be a one way street because, otherwise, Lupin wouldn’t
have said to Harry that Sirius is dead, he’s not coming back. If there was a chance, if somehow people could come out of that Veil, I think he would have said so.

Ben: Okay.

Micah: But it just doesn’t make a lot of sense to me that, unless that is
sort of the passageway into the Beyond, that…

Ben: Then why would they keep it secret?

Micah: …then every single wizard that dies, or witch that dies, is behind there. You know what I mean?

Laura: Yeah, but why wouldn’t they know about it? You know? If that’s where
everyone goes when they die, how could they not – how could it not be common knowledge?

Micah: But Lupin seems to know, though.

Ben: I don’t think it’s truly an afterlife. I think it’s like a gateway to the afterlife.

Micah: Right.

Ben: I mean, it’s not like saying, “Behind the Veil is…” I mean, it’s like, behind the Veil will probably be like, your, you know, depending on what religion you are, your Heaven, your Hell, whatever, your Paradise, Abraham’s bosom, or whatever you believe in, and I’m not sure that, like, they would think, “Oh, behind the Veil is, like behind the Veil is behind the Veil,” like that’s a location, you know? I assume they think when they die they go to Heaven, Hell, like their own form of their own afterlife, not necessarily, “beyond the Veil.” They don’t think of dying, going, “beyond the Veil.” If you know what I’m saying.

Laura: Do you think it’s a sort of Purgatory? Maybe? I’m thinking about if
it does lead somewhere, what if it’s kind of a Limbo between two worlds?
Like, what if you’re sort of stuck there? You know what I mean?

Micah: But didn’t Lupin – you just said that nobody else seems to know about it – but Lupin seemed pretty confident that Sirius was dead.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Because he grabbed Harry, and he said, “He’s gone, he’s gone.”

Laura: Well…

Andrew: And I mean, Sirius knew what the hell was about to happen, too, because he… [sighs] Laura, do you have the page open? I was just reading it earlier.

Laura: Oh, no. I closed it. It said something like…

Andrew: [sarcastically] Oh, Laura. You – ah – geez…

Laura: No, I remember the quote! I remember the quote.

Andrew: No, off my show. Off my show.

[Micah laughs]

Laura: I remember the quote! Shut up!

Andrew: Harry… No, I’m just kidding. It’s not my show, I hate it when people say that.

Laura: It said something along the lines of, “the laughter had not quite died from his godfather’s face,” and all this stuff.

Andrew: Oh, I’m getting it. Right, right.

Laura: He was shocked.

Andrew: Oh, you wait one second. I have my…

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: …U.S. paperback. Yeah, “The second jet of light hit him squarely on the chest. The laughter had not quite died from his face, but his eyes widened in shock.” So, it seems like he knew what was about to happen.

Laura: Well, I always attributed that to just being stunned.

Ben: Yeah.

Laura: Like I’m not sure if he was really thinking about, “Oh, crap, I’m about to fall backwards through the Veil.”

Andrew: But, “The laughter had not quite died from his face.” That’s what lead me to think that…

Laura: Well, yeah, because he was laughing at Bellatrix.

Andrew: Right.

Ben: Why would he laugh in the face of defeat? I don’t get that.

Laura: No, because he’d just been laughing at her a few moments before.

Ben: Okay, yeah.

Andrew: Because he said, “Come on, you can do better than that,” when she tried to put a jinx on her, I think it was.

Ben: And he was probably shocked because he was kind of being arrogant saying, “Oh, pretty much I’m better than you, there’s no way you can beat me,” and then, BAM! He gets nailed. [laughs]

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah.


Why Didn’t Harry Ask More About the Veil?


Micah: Something else that is interesting is, why doesn’t Harry ask more
questions about what exactly it is?

Laura: Yeah, I thought that in Half-Blood Prince he would have…

Andrew: Yeah! That’s what bugged me, too! [laughs]

Laura: …wanted to know. I figured we were going to learn so much about the Veil in Half-Blood Prince, and we didn’t.

Ben: I really didn’t expect to, because I thought – I don’t know. It just didn’t seem like – I thought the Ministry would be saved for the last.

Laura: Well, I figured – I didn’t think we’d find out, you know, exactly what it was, but I figured we’d hear more about it.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: I don’t even think the word ‘veil’ was in that book.

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah. Well, it leads me to wonder, why didn’t Harry just ask Dumbledore at the end of Book Five when he was talking to him in his office?

Micah: Yeah, exactly.

Andrew: What gives, Harry?

[Laura laughs]

Ben: Because, maybe it didn’t come to mind, and maybe JKR…

Andrew: Yeah, but it was Sirius!

Ben: …needed to keep that detail out until the last possible moment. [laughs]

Andrew: Probably.


The Veil in Book Seven


Ben: So, what about the Veil in Book Seven? I mean, do you think Harry is going to use it? I, personally…

Andrew: It’s got to be brought up.

Laura: Oh, yeah. He’s going to have to go.

Ben: Of course, yeah, she has to tie that up somehow. And, you know, throughout Book Seven Harry is going to have to do a lot of investigating, just in general, acquire as much knowledge as possible, you know. There’s talk about he’s going to return to Godric’s Hollow, all these places, and the Ministry of Magic has to be one of them in order…

Laura: Mhm. There’s been a lot of talk about Harry going back to Hogwarts to do research, and I don’t think so. I think if he does research, it’s going to happen at the Department of Mysteries. Because that’s the place that holds all of the answers that he needs; especially the one door that he couldn’t get open, that had “the power of love” behind it, allegedly.

Micah: But, if you look at a lot of the different sort of heroic tales, there is always that journey into the underworld.

Laura: Mhm.

Micah: Before he can finally complete his quest, there’s always somebody there that knows some piece of information.


Back to Comparing the Veil and Invisibility Cloak


Andrew: Getting back to the Invisibility Cloak, did we really answer this?

Laura: I, personally, don’t think that they’re one and the same.

Micah: They seem to have similar qualities.

Andrew: Yeah, which is interesting, but what was that girl’s theory, Micah, that it just makes them invisible?

Laura: That room would be pretty crowded, though. [laughs]

Andrew: Yeah. Well, if it makes you invisible…

Micah: No, no, no, that’s not what she said.

Laura: It just seems like, if that were the case, then there would have been no issue with Ron and Hermione hearing any of the whispering.

Andrew: Right.

Micah: Well, if it’s a big Invisibility Cloak, it’s just covering what’s beyond it. You know what I mean?

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: It can’t be a big Invisibility Cloak. That sounds so goofy.

Ben: Yeah, because it isn’t like there’s a… It isn’t like if you look behind there, there’s going to be like, a million people standing right there.

[Micah laughs]

Ben: It doesn’t work like that.

Andrew: Yeah.

[Laura laughs]

Micah: She just said that, the Veil may be made of the same material as the Cloak. So, when people pass through the Veil, they don’t die, they just become invisible.

Ben: I don’t think…

Laura: But why wouldn’t Sirius come running up and be like, “Hey, Harry, I’m invisible!” You know? [laughs]

Ben: Yeah, and JK Rowling said that she had to kill off a character in Book Five.

Laura: Yeah, she did, actually.

Andrew: That is close to Harry.

Ben: She was very upset about it, and I doubt it was, in Emerson’s words,
“Martin Miggs the Mad Muggle.” I’m pretty sure it was Sirius. I mean, there’s no doubt. [laughs]

Andrew: Yeah.


Tangent: Seeing Sirius Again

Micah: Well, it doesn’t mean we won’t see him in some form.

Laura: I don’t think so. I’m not one of those that subscribes to the…

Andrew: No, we have to.

Laura: …the theory that…

Andrew: He’s his godfather.

Laura: Okay, but… [laughs]

Andrew: And people question, why did he play such a big role in Book 3 and then
killed off in Book Five? There has to be something more to it, like in Book Seven he, I don’t know…

Laura: Because there was nothing else to do with him.

Andrew: Well, here’s a question.

Laura: Even Jo said that he had become a brooding presence in the books. He was done. [laughs]

Andrew: Here’s a question. How could Sirius come back? The two-way mirrors? We’ve sort of discussed that. The portrait?

Ben: I think that has to relate to it somehow, the two-way mirror.

Laura: I don’t know if Harry’s going to use that to communicate with Sirius, necessarily.

Andrew: Well, it all comes down to, if he had his two-way mirror with him when he fell through, which…

Ben: I don’t know. I seem to think we’re missing our guess about the two-way mirror thing.

Laura: You know what I think it depends a lot on? What exactly death is in the wizarding world. All we know is that when you die, you’re dead. We don’t know if you choose not to return as a ghost, if you have any afterlife, or if it all just goes black. I mean, we don’t know. If that’s the case, then there is no way Sirius can communicate with Harry.

Micah: Does your soul travel down…

Laura: Yeah.

Micah: [laughs] …to the Department of Mysteries?


JKR Defining Death


Andrew: It seems like Jo tries to stay away from explaining death.

Laura: I don’t know.

Andrew: Because it’s a very close and touchy subject.

Ben: Well, it depends on…

Laura: Well, it was…

Ben: I don’t know. Because she said, well, Dumbledore said that there are things much worse than death. And you hear in the Department of Mysteries, you hear Voldemort say to Dumbledore, “There is nothing worse than death, Dumbledore.” Blah, blah, blah.

Andrew: Although, could you imagine if she started talking about what would happen after death?

Ben: Oh yeah, of course! She can’t define what happens after death because then the religious radicals really are going to go nuts.

[Laura and Micah laugh]

Ben: Because, that’s too much, I mean…

Laura: I’m calling you out, Laura Mallory. Calling you out.

Ben: [laughs] Yeah.

Laura: No, the thing is, though…

Andrew: We should talk about her again for a second, later.

Laura: If she doesn’t define death, then there’s absolutely no way that we’re going to see Dumbledore, Sirius, Lily, James, or anyone else who has ever died in the series.

Andrew: Right, but we could still see them in another form.

Ben: Well, I don’t know.

Laura: Yeah, this is true.

Ben: That’s a good point, but what I don’t see… I don’t know about… She’s not going to define death in a way, in a religious sense, you know what I’m saying? Because then she’s…

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Because that’s when she’ll cross the line in the eyes of many people, like Christians, Muslims, whatever religion you are. Then she may cross the line. But as long as it’s sort of like a vague representation of the afterlife, I don’t really see there being really much of a problem with it. I mean, it is a fantasy book. Gandalf came back from the dead – that’s
not possible, you know? Except I have a thing, Harry Potter has just gotten a lot of notoriety.

Micah: We know it’s not possible for Dumbledore.

Ben: Right.

Laura: Well…

Micah: That we know. We don’t know about anybody else. And until she actually says it herself, I’m…

Laura: Well, Jo said Sirius is dead. [laughs] I mean…

Ben: Right, but another thing is, it’s important to remember is…

Micah: It doesn’t mean he’s not going to make an appearance.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: …that we cannot bring people back to life.

Micah: Right.

Ben: You know what I’m saying? But Jo – I keep referring to Jo, to Dumbledore as Jo, because it’s really her words – but Dumbledore said that those who love you, even though they may not be there physically, they truly haven’t left. You know? It’s that type of thing.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Their presence will still always be felt.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Harry’s always going to remember what he learned from Sirius. Sirius is always going to be in the back of his mind. So, it’s not like Sirius truly is dead – he’s dead in the physical sense, but in a personal sense he’s still Harry’s godfather. He’s really – he’s still there, in a way. His influence remains, just he’s no longer there to add any further input.

Andrew: What I’m saying is that, if he does come back, he’ll come back in a different form, because maybe the Veil didn’t really kill him, but in Bono’s words, he’ll be “all that he can’t leave behind.”

Ben: [sings] It’s all that you can’t leave behind…

Laura: Yeah, the only thing is, though, I’m not sure how I feel about…

Andrew: Laura, shhh. [sings] All that you fashion, all that you…

Ben: Sorry, sorry.

Laura: [sighs] I can’t believe you were shushing me.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: Here I am, talking about Harry Potter on a Harry Potter show and you shush me to sing.

Andrew: Hey, hey, hey, we haven’t had a U2 moment in a while, we had to have one.

[Ben laughs]

Laura: Okay, no, you had plenty of U2 moments before we recorded. Thank you very much. Now, as I was saying…

[Andrew fakes crying]

Laura: Now, I can’t even remember. [laughs] I’m sorry! I’m sorry.

[Andrew sniffles]

Laura: Anyway, the thing is, Voldemort fears death so much that I don’t think that the series can finish without us learning about what death is in Harry’s world.

Andrew: Any final conclusions from anyone? I mean, I guess we covered all the bases here. So, we really covered everything about the Veil. [laughs]

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: And there’s not much to cover in the first place, but we covered everything there is. So…

Micah: Well, wait. I’ll ask one more question.

Andrew: Oh, okay.


Who Made The Veil?


Micah: If it’s not made out of the same material, right, as the Invisibility Cloak – we really didn’t touch on, then, who made it.

Ben: Actually, George Washington’s wife knitted it.

Micah: Martha?

Ben: Martha knitted it.

Micah: [laughs] That’s genius.

Ben: No, I don’t know if it’s really necessary to find out who made the cloth that covered the Veil.

Laura: Well, what if it’s…

Ben: It’s probably a linen, a cotton substance, probably.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: It’s a – what?!

[Laura and Micah laugh]

Andrew: No.

Laura: [laughs] What if it’s something along the lines of Stonehenge? It’s one of those really weird things…

Andrew: Right.

Laura: …that someone built, but we have no clue because it’s so old.

Andrew: Because again, it looked like – in this artist’s rendering – it was part of the earth. And in the book, I’m pretty sure that Dumbledore does say – Harry asks him, or someone asks someone, and Dumbledore says that the Veil was there for as long as the Ministry had been there, if not longer.

Laura: Wow, the Ministry must be pretty old, [laughs] when you think of it that way.


Studying Death


Andrew: [laughs] Yeah. Yeah, I’m pretty sure, I’m 99% sure that’s in the book. But, also, this Veil area – the Death Room – is where you study. How do you study death? And do they still study death?

Laura: Well, what you do Andrew…

Ben: Actually, they push…

Andrew: Like do they just chuck stuff through it and it comes back out?

Ben: They threw puppies, they throw puppies through it.

Andrew: Throw puppies through it?

Ben: They throw puppies through the Veil.

Laura: I was going to say that they pick their least favorite person on a podcast and they throw them through.

Ben: Then, bye, Laura.

Laura: No, I was actually thinking of you, Ben.

Ben: Bye, Eric. Bye, Eric.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: Just kidding.

Andrew: He’s already through.

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: No, because it makes me – it kind of annoys me. Why don’t you just throw a fishing line in there, see what happens, reel it out…

Laura: [laughs] See if someone grabs on to it?

Andrew: Or just stick your hand through. Seriously. Why can’t you just stick your hand through?

Laura: Okay, why don’t you just…

Andrew: I’m serious. I’m being serious.

Laura: …go stick your hand through something that kills people when they go through it, and let me know how it goes.

Ben: Yeah.

Andrew: No, I’m just saying, why don’t you test it, why don’t you – maybe they have.

Laura: I don’t know. Wasn’t there a theory…

Andrew: I’m being serious, though. [laughs] Not Sirius Black! [rings bell] Ooh-ho-ho-ho!

Laura: Owww.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: Anyway.

Laura: Wasn’t there a theory discussed – I think we talked about this on a show way back at the beginning – that someone brought up, what if going through the Veil turns you into a Dementor?

Ben: No.

Andrew: Oooh. Interesting, but he’s dead. So…

Laura: I know he’s dead.

Andrew: He’s dead, he’s dead.

Laura: But it’s kind of along the lines of, what if the Veil is made out of – that was pre-Book Six that that theory came about. [laughs]

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: But how do you study death?

Ben: I don’t know, there’s…

Andrew: How can they use the Veil to study death?

Ben: …there’s a big textbook about it.

Laura: Well, see, you know what? And this could just be me looking into it too much, but Jo said it wasn’t used as a torture chamber.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: And I’m kind of wondering, how do you study death without throwing people through this Veil?

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah.

Laura: I’ve kind of always wondered, I’m like, what if they took Azkaban prisoners and just threw them through this veil just to test death, see what was going on with it? What if they took the ones who had had their souls sucked out by Dementors and just shoved them through?

Andrew: Why don’t you just…

Laura: What then? But then, wouldn’t that be, technically, considered torture?

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: I mean, I guess it depends on how you define torture.

Laura: So, then, the only other solution, if they’re not throwing people through it, then someone has to go into it.

Andrew: Unless they’re just using it to hear the voices that are coming from out of it.

Laura: Yeah, but only certain people can hear them.

Andrew: Right, and then it would just be those people who are able to hear the voices that would be studying death.

Laura: I don’t know, it just, it seems like a waste for it to be there and not have any kind of interaction with it. You know, it just seems like…

Micah: Well, we don’t know that.

Laura: Something’s…

Micah: We just haven’t been told that.

Laura: Something’s got to be going in there. Something has got to go through that Veil.

Andrew: Not really, because you can’t observe what happens after someone goes through it, and if it’s a one-way street, so to speak. That’s why I’m thinking that they can only use it to hear voices.

Micah: Well, there’s probably a way that they could communicate with whomever’s on the other side of that…

Laura: Two-way mirror.

Micah: …one would think.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: No, that’s just the case with Sirius and James, I think.

Micah: No, because, I mean…

Laura: No, no, no. It was a joke, Andrew

Micah: …if the Veil was there…

Andrew: Oh.

Micah: …beforehand, before the Ministry even was there…

Andrew: And they built it around it, which, really, that is how it looked.

Micah: …then, the chances are that there was already someone or something behind the Veil. So, perhaps they’ve been working on a way to communicate with those that are there.

Laura: Maybe. Did you guys also notice that the chamber it was in, it was described a lot like the courtroom Harry had been in at the beginning of the book? It had lots of seats…

Andrew: Is it – doesn’t it sort of look like a coliseum?

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Like, seating. Yeah.

Laura: And, so, you’re wondering, how many people do they have studying this?

Andrew: Hmmm, yeah. Yeah, but those weren’t… Was that Ministry-built too? I wish I remembered that picture. I should’ve taken a picture of the picture.

Laura: What if it was, at one time, used for torture? Maybe they don’t use it that way anymore.

Andrew: I don’t know, how could you consider it torture? Once you throw them through, they’re done, it’s not like…

Ben: Yeah.

Laura: But it’s still killing them. [laughs]

Ben: Right, but that’s not torture. Why don’t you use the Cruciatus Curse if you’re going to torture them?

Laura: So, so you’re saying, you’re saying, Ben, that if we, if we kill somebody, but we don’t cause them any pain, it’s not torture?

Ben: Not at all.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: Well, what… Tell me, tell me, what would you rather die…

Laura: You…

Ben: How would you rather die?

Laura: Okay, it doesn’t…

Ben: Have, have – go through a guillotine…

Laura: It doesn’t matter.

Ben: …have your head cut off, or would you rather be electrocuted, where you die a lot more slowly?

Laura: It, okay, it doesn’t matter.

Ben: I think you’d rather have it be quick, than…

Laura: It doesn’t matter what you prefer. It doesn’t matter. The circumstance doesn’t matter. The fact is you’re still taking away a person’s life.

Ben: Right, but that’s not torture. You’re not torturing them. Torture is…

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: …like when you…

Laura: Yeah, it’s torture leading up to it.

Andrew: A painful death.

Ben: How? How?

Laura: It’s torture leading up to it, when you’re like, “I’m about to die.”

Ben: Oh, you mean when you’re pushing the… Yeah, but that’s not torture.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: Torture is like extensive punishment, and…

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: …you don’t even have to kill them.

Andrew: [sighs] That’s the… Yeah, we don’t need to make…

Laura: I don’t agree.

Andrew: …a discussion out of that, but…

Laura: I don’t agree.

Andrew: Final conclusions: I say, Veil is a portal to death, you can hear the voices, so they can study the voices, hear the death – hear dead people, I mean.

Laura: I don’t think the Veil is the only path to the afterlife. I think it’s a specific…

Andrew: Well, there’s the other one, which is stabbing you in the throat.

[Laura and Micah laugh]

Laura: God, Andrew! You make me cry.

Andrew: Well, it’s a portal to death, right? Not you personally. I’m just saying as a…

Laura: [still laughing] No, I think that it is a very specific path to a section of underlife. I just don’t think that you go through there. It would be like, for instance, if you’re talking about an afterlife, like we would imagine it. It’s not like you have six doors, and you go through one of them, and you still get to the same place. I’m thinking of it as, you get into this place that is an afterlife, but you can’t get out, and it’s not where everyone else goes, if you go through the Veil.

Andrew: Do you have a final thought on the subject, Ben?

Ben: Ben Schoen’s – I’m like Jerry Springer, it’s Ben Schoen’s final thought.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: The Veil, it’s a big mystery. That’s all, that’s all I know about it. I don’t think it’s the only – I don’t think there’s like a portal to the afterlife, there’s something that’s special about the Veil. It may… It could be a portal to the afterlife.

[Micah laughs]

Ben: But I don’t think, you know, people think, “Oh, when I die I go behind the Veil.” I think, if it’s a portal to anything, it’s like a portal to Heaven or Hell or whatever. I mean, it’s not like, “Oh, you die, you go behind the Veil where you whisper to people as they walk by.” [laughs] It doesn’t work like that.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Right.

Ben: That’s my last thought.

Laura: Micah, what’s your final thought?

Micah: I think it may just be, because there’s actual whispering that’s taking place, maybe it’s just the collection of souls, in a way, that they’re studying. Maybe those that are – just got caught. I don’t know, it’s really weird, but I like the whole idea that the Ministry was built around this thing, and that this thing has been there for quite some time. And building the Ministry around it is a way to protect it, and if it really is that important, and Jo sort of follows the whole line of this being some sort of heroic tale, which, you know, she never follows mainstream, but I think that we’ll see, definitely, something interesting will be revealed about it in Book Seven. I’m not saying Harry is going to through the Veil, or whatever, but maybe he uses it for his own purposes.

Andrew: That was a good talk. That was a good – geez, that was over a half hour. That was a solid 45 minutes. [laughs]


Laura Mallory


Andrew: Laura and Micah, there’s been something that’s been bugging all of us, but you two, especially.

Laura: Well, as everyone knows, Laura Mallory, who is a Gwinnett County, Georgia, mother of four – she’s actually, she’s about 30 minutes away from me – has been campaigning to get the Potter books removed from the Gwinnett County school libraries. Well – oh, God, what day was it that that was?

Micah: It was two days ago? Was it two days ago?

Laura: I don’t even remember. Two days ago? Okay, well, a couple of days ago, she took her hearing to the state, and she basically, she appealed to the State Supreme Court to get the books banned from the school libraries. What I found interesting this time, though, was she actually acknowledged some of the good themes in the books. Like friendship, loyalty, good versus evil, which was weird to me because this whole time, she’s been saying the books are evil, and now she’s saying that they kind of, you know, go for good versus evil, or good triumphing over evil.

Andrew: Mhm. Micah, do you have anything to add?

Micah: I just don’t understand the whole point behind banning these books. I mean, there are themes in almost any classic book that you can sort of look at and say you know what, “There’s a problem with this and I don’t want my child to read it,” and I think it should just be as simple as that. If she doesn’t want her children to read these books, then don’t let them read it. I mean, they’re going to come to a certain age where they’re going to start doing whatever it is that they feel is necessary, and if they want to pick up and read a Harry Potter novel, that’s their choice, but she’s the supervisor now. She’s the guardian of them until they’re 18 years old. If she feels that it’s not the place of the child to read the book, that’s fine, but I don’t think she should be imposing her will on other people.

Laura: Mhm. You know what I find interesting about that? She recommended that children read other books, such as The Chronicles of Narnia, and I realize that Narnia is a very – it’s, you know, very religiously based; however, she talks about how Harry lies, cheats, and steals. Well, what can you say about Edmund from Narnia? He betrayed his family, and it was a mistake. Of course, he realized that, but it’s another life lesson, just like Harry learns.

Micah: Not to mention there’s a witch in the story!

[Andrew laughs]

Laura: I know! And they sacrifice Aslan! She goes on about evil blood sacrifice, and I’m like, “Ummm… Aslan much?”

Andrew: You know, guys, this is buggin’ me. This is really grindin’ my gears.

Micah: Uh oh. It’s what’s buggin’ Andrew now.

Andrew: This is really – this makes me want to “Get a Butterbeer.” Makes me want to say, “What’s Buggin’ Andrew.”

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: But, how about we give her a call? Try to give her a call? Okay. Let’s do it.

Laura: Well…oh…okay.

[Phone rings]

[Phone rings again]

[No answer]

[Still no answer]

Andrew: [laughs] Leave a message if …

Mr. Mallory on answering machine: Hi, you’ve reached the Mallorys. Your call is very important to us…

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Mr. Mallory on answering machine: Please leave your name and number…

Andrew: I bet!

[Everyone laughs]

Mr. Mallory on answering machine: …and a brief message after the tone…

Andrew: Leave a message!

Mr. Mallory on answering machine: …and we’ll return your call as soon as possible. Thanks, and have a good day. Bye.

[Answering machine beeps]

Ben: Hey, Laura. This is Ben from the Harry Potter MuggleCast podcast, and I was just calling to ask you a few questions about your vendetta against the books, and to see if – feel free to give me a call back at this number. Thank you.

Andrew: All right. Well, that’s a bummer, but, hey – maybe she’ll call you back, Ben.

Ben: That – wouldn’t that be weird?

Micah: [laughs] Yeah.

Laura: [laughs] What if she calls you at, like, three in the morning?

Micah: What would you say to her?

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Ben: “Hey, Ben, I want to ban your book because I want attention in the media is the real reason why.”

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, yeah. [laughs] Well, I like the part where it goes, “Your call is really important to us.”

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: Is it? Then call us back! Anyway…

Andrew: [clears throat] Got to clear my throat for this next segme – bleah! – segment. Time for Andrew’s …

[Ben sneezes]

Andrew: Whoa!

Ben: Sorry. Ben Schoen’s dying.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: Tell us what’s beyond the veil, Ben.

Ben: I don’t know. Well, I’ll tell you.

Andrew: That sneeze.

Ben: I’ll write you a letter. I’ll bring my two-way mirror.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Ben: I’ll text message you from behind the veil.

[Laura laughs]


Andrew’s HUH?! of the Week


Andrew: Hey, it’s time for Andrew’s HUH?! of the Week!

Laura: Wooo!

[Andre presses Staples Easy Button: That was easy!]

Andrew: It’s not an e-mail, guys. It’s something – it’s something different this week. It’s actually a YouTube video, and a lot of you have been e-mailing us this video, and it’s actually really funny, because this girl nailed it head-on. What makes a MuggleCast fan girl? And she got it exactly right, and she recorded it after she met all of us, and, you know, went to Lumos and all that. So, we’re going to play it right now. There’s some naughty language in here, so we had to edit it down just a little bit, but take a listen to this. It’s pretty funny:

[Audio]: Oh, my god! Hi, guys. I just got back from Lumos, and it was, like, the best time I ever had in my life. It was, like, so amazing. There was, like, some really stupid that I didn’t understand, but I got to see MuggleCast, and I got to see Emerson, and I got to see Andrew, and I got to see Ben, and I got to see Eric, and I got to see John Noe, and it was, like, so amazing. I waited in line for, like, twelve hours, even though you weren’t really supposed to line up, but I just waited outside the door, because there was, like, some other stupid stuff going on, like, all my friends went to go see this guy. I don’t really know his name. It’s like its Steve Vander something. Like, who thinks about Steve Vander something. I don’t. I waited in line, and then, like, Emerson, like, walked by me, like, five times, and I was like, “Oh, my god! Emerson, I love you!” And he was like, “Yeah, blah blah blah.: And there was, like, really weird people at Lumos. And I was, like, really upset, because Dylan wasn’t there, and really, Dylan’s, like, the hottest one, and, like, some people think he’s not very important, but I think he’s really important, because he does the layouts for MuggleNet, and that’s, like, the most important part, and it’s, like, if the layouts were never really good, like, no one would go to MuggleNet. Um, yeah. There’s, like, a lot of people who, like, really like The Leaky Cauldron, and I don’t know why. The Leaky Cauldron’s really stupid. I don’t know. I don’t get Sue and her Hufflepuff stuff. Like, who wants to be in Hufflepuff? Hufflepuff is so stupid. There’s no hot guys in Huff – oh. Never mind. There is a hot guy in Hufflepuff. [gospel music starts] Never mind. I, like, totally love Hufflepuff. Hufflepuff is, like, the best house ever. So, like, Jamie came up to me, and he was, like, “Do you want a sticker?” And I was, like, “Oh, my god! I would love a sticker!” And so he, like, gave me a sticker, and I was, like, “Oh, my god! Jamie just handed me a sticker!” So now, like, every night, for the most part, I kiss it and stuff. And, so, in total, I got, like, five hugs from Emerson, and, like, ten from Eric, and one from Andrew, and, like, three from Ben, and two from John Noe, and, um, five from Jamie, and I almost asked Laura Thompson for a hug, but no one, like, really cares about Laura Thompson anyway. Laura Thompson isn’t a hot guy, so I don’t really care about her. And I think she should just leave MuggleCast, because no one cares. Like, just think: Jamie’s hands were on this, and maybe Emerson’s hands were on it. And if Emerson’s hands were on it, that means that J.K. Rowling’s hands were on it. I’d rather be kissing Emerson’s hands than J.K. Rowling’s hands. I know that’s really stupid, because, like, if it wasn’t for J.K. Rowling, there would be no Harry Potter, and if there wasn’t any Harry Potter, there would be, like, no Emerson.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: That was great!

Andrew: That was good! That was good.


Chicken Soup For The MuggleCast Soul


Andrew: Well, we’re going to wrap things up now with a Chicken Soup for the MuggleCast Soul.

Ben: I hate this.

Andrew: The segment Ben loves to hate. This comes from Reva, 33, of Cleveland. Subject: Bad day, made me better. Actually, just Bad day made better.

Recently, I needed to have a surgical procedure done. The doctor said to find something I liked to listen to. They were going to use a local anesthesia, so I figured I didn’t want to stare into space for that long. Even though it was outpatient, he said I would be there a while. Three hours, to be exact. I borrowed a friend’s iPod and downloaded three podcasts from MuggleCast. Needless to say, this was the first time the doctor ever had a patient giggling during a surgery. Thanks for making a really hard day a lot better. P.S. The [emphasizes] pickle thing got me every time, but maybe that was the anesthesia.

Ben: Oh, of course you’re going to include that one. Pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle…

Andrew: Pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle! [laughs] No, that had nothing to do with the pickle. That was just one that was sent in, so…


Show Close


Andrew [Show Close with music in background]: Thank you, Reva. You can also send your Chicken Soup stories to mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com. Just put “Chicken Soup” in the subject line. As always, we enjoy reading them.

So, boys and girls, yeah, that does wrap up Episode 58. We are so thrilled to be back as People’s Choice winners!

Ben: Yeah!

Laura: Doesn’t it feel so good to say that?

Andrew: Once again, I am Andrew – yes it does.

Micah: Now, we’re up for another award, too. October 11.

Andrew: What’s Oct…

Laura: Oh, yeah.

Andrew: Oh yeah! Kid’s Choice Awards, Australia! [Laughs] Who’s going?

Laura: I want my blimp.

Ben: Erica. [laughs]

Laura: I want blimps.

Andrew: Yeah, Erica. [laughs] We’ve got to have a… Yeah, anyone out there in Australia, who’s going to be around, what is it, October 11th? Tune into Nickelodeon keep an eye out for the category of fave podcast. Let us know if we won, or if we lost. And if we won, I guess they’ll be in contact with us? I don’t know.

Ben: They’ll e-mail us a surfboard. A picture of a surfboard.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs] They said it’s a web only category, so I don’t know what that means, but hopefully we’ll get something from it. So anyway, I’m Andrew.

Ben: I am Ben.

Laura: I’m Laura.

Micah: And I’m Micah.

Andrew: Tannenbaum.

Micah: [laughs] Thanks, Andrew.

Andrew: [laughs] Oh, our contact information. Ben, what is the P.O. Box?

Ben:

P.O. Box 223
Moundridge, Kansas 67107.

Send us anything, everything, only if you want to. Remember there is no obligation to send anything to the MuggleCast P.O. Box. Only if you feel like it. Don’t feel like you have to.

Andrew: You can also call us. In the United States: 1-218-20-MAGIC (62442) In the United Kingdom: 020-8144-0677 If in Australia: 02-8003-5668 That’s for voicemail questions or comments. Also, you can Skype us with the user name MuggleCast to leave your voicemail questions, comments, or e-mail mugglecast at staff dot mugglenet dot com.

Ben: Wait. There’s a contact form on MuggleCast.com, our web page.

Andrew: Or if you just want to e-mail any of us personally, it’s out first name at staff dot mugglenet dot com. Also, do not forget that the interview with creators of the Order of the Phoenix video game. For more information on that, go to MuggleCast.com it will be right there. Also, check out our new MuggleCast website!

Laura: Yay.

Ben: Yay.

Micah: Yay.

Ben: Oh, crap, is that up?

[Micah laughs]

Ben: I have to get it up then

Andrew: No, but it has to go up. [laughs] We have a fun new blog on there that we’ll be posting all the MuggleCast updates, and maybe we’ll do something else with it. All the usual stuff is there. Once again that wraps up episode 58, and we’ll see everyone next week for Episode 59! We leave you tonight with a special MuggleCast parody by a MuggleCast listener, Tom, who took some audio clips of Ben and I, and put them in to a mock interview that he did with us. It’s actually pretty funny, so you’ll hear that at the end of the show. Bye everyone!

Ben: See ya!

Micah: See ya!

Laura: Bye!

Andrew: Bye! Bye Internet. [laughs and says in high-pitched voice] Bye!


MuggleCast Parody


Tom: Hello and welcome to the first edition of a probable series of one; MuddleCast, the companion podcast to the popular Harry Potter show, MuggleCast. I’m your host, Tom Stelzer. The aim of this podcast is to provide you devoted MuggleCast listeners with the background on your favorite podcasters, through interviews with each of the main players. Whilst many of you have met many of the podcasters at various live events, we still really haven’t had a chance to get to know the people behind the minds, which is where this show will come in. First up, we’re going to catch up with Andrew Sims, the host of MuggleCast. Hello Andrew.

Andrew: Welcome everyone to the show, but…

Tom: Thanks, Andrew, but that’s my job here.

Andrew: Yeah! Yeah! All right!

Tom: Who’s that in the background? Is that your cheer squad or something?

Andrew: Yeah!

Tom: Do they scream every time you say “Yeah”?

Andrew: Yeah! Yeah! All right!

Tom: Okay, so anyway, Andrew, you having a good day?

Andrew: Yeah!

Tom: How’s it been?

Andrew: All right!

Tom: That’s good to hear.

Andrew: Pickles.

Tom: Ummm, okay. So first up, Andrew, would you be able to tell us how the idea of doing a Harry Potter podcast first came up?

Andrew: Yeah! Yeah! All right!

Tom: Care to elaborate?

Andrew: Yeah!

Tom: Well?

Andrew [To the tune of the Harry Potter theme song]: Nar nar nar nar nar nar nar nar nar nar nar…

Tom: Are you actually going to say something?

Andrew: Yeah!

Tom: Well that’s good, let’s hear it then.

Andrew: All right!

Tom: Yeah, we got that the first time, but is there anything else you’d like to add?

Andrew: Pickles.

Tom: Yeah, you’ve already said that, too. Okay, well, I think that’s all we’ve got time for. Ladies and Gentlemen, Andrew Sims.

Andrew: Yeah! Yeah! All right!

Tom: Thanks, Andrew. That was very illuminating. Okay, next up we’ve got everyone’s favorite MoundRidgian, although that’s nothing special because there’s only about five of them. Direct from Kansas, it’s Ben Schoen.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Tom: I – yeah. I just said that. So, anyway, how are you today, Ben?

Ben: It’s rough being Ben Schoen.

Tom: So, what are you up to today?

Ben: Thirty six inches of…

Tom: No, I wasn’t talking about how much Subway you’ve eaten. I mean what are you going to be doing today?

Ben: Give me a Butterbeer.

Tom: Uh, sorry Ben, but I don’t have any Butterbeer.

Ben: It’s rough being Ben Schoen.

Tom: I’m sure it is. Anyway, I’m sorry but that’s all we’ve got time for today.

Ben: Time flies when you’re having fun.

Tom: Very true. Thanks, Ben.


Blooper


Jamie: [Slowly] I’ve never ever insulted your parents.

Ben: There he goes.

Jamie: [Slowly laughs] Can you record it for me so I can hear it?

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, we’re recording. You sound really stupid. [laughs]

[Andrew and Ben laugh]

Andrew: [Imitating Jamie] Hey guys blah blah blah!

Jamie: Record it for me. Andrew, record it for me so I can hear it.

Andrew: Yeah, I know.


Micah: While we’re on the topic of banning, as reported previously, the Georgian mother, Laura Mallory campaigned for the Harry Potter books to be removed… [stumbles over word] Yes! Oh, nice. Now he dropped it. See, this is why you cannot do the news, and watch the Mets in the playoffs at the same time.

———————–

Written by: Micah, Adrienne, Allison, Amanda, Jessica, Judy, Mandie, Margaret, Martina, Matthew, Megan, Sarah, Shannon and Shelly

Transcript #57

MuggleCast 57 Transcript


Show Intro


Andrew: Four weeks late but as promised, MuggleCast 57 is ready for your listening pleasure: Recorded September 18th, 2006. Once you hear the show, you’ll understand why we wanted to keep it as number 57. Granted, the show is a bit of a mess, [show intro music in background] especially at the end. We had some major audio issues that we tried to work out as best as possible, but we hope you’ll still enjoy the show even if it is a little outdated.

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Ben: Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys.

Andrew: What?

Ben: Breaking news.

Andrew: Huh?

Ben: An E-coli spinach scare increases to 21 states.

Andrew: What?

Jamie: That’s quite a lot.

Kevin: Wow.

Ben: So, Popeye, beware.

[Jamie starts humming Popeye theme song]

Kevin: Watch those salads.

Ben: A Douglas county Nebraska resident was sickened by this strain of bacteria.

[Jamie stops humming Popeye theme song]

Ben: There have been 111 people sick and one person has died.

Andrew: This is kind of a depressing way to start the show.

Jamie: All from spinach?

Ben: I know.

Kevin: It is a pretty depressing way to start the show.

Ben: All from spinach.

Jamie: Bluto is just going to just kick Popeye’s butt now.

Ben: I know.

Jamie: Because he’s not going to have any spinach.

Ben: [laughs] It’s all infected with E-coli.

Jamie: [laughs] It is.

Ben: So, you heard it here first, MuggleCast: We save lives. Don’t eat spinach.

Jamie: Unless you’re Popeye.

Ben: Stay away! Unless you’re Popeye. [laughs]

Andrew: What about pickles? Do pickles have E-coli in them?

Jamie: No.

Andrew: They’re green, too, and they taste bad.

Ben: I think pickles are safe, Andrew.

Andrew: Oh, good.

Ben: Pickles are safe.

Andrew: Good.

Jamie: That would suck, though, if we sort of said that word and people all bought pickles to send and we found out that…

Andrew: Yeah. Spinach, spinach, spinach! It’s our new tagline!

Jamie: …touching pickles cause….

Kevin: Cancer.

Jamie: Yeah. A specific skin disease or something.

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: I couldn’t sleep at night with that on my conscience, I must admit.

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: That’s pretty funny.

Kevin: I don’t think you’d have a problem, Jamie.

Jamie: No, I think I would. Seriously. I really do think I would.

Andrew: Welcome, everyone, to the show. As you can see we’re off to a great start already. This is going to be all about spinach.

Ben: Mhm. [laughs]

Andrew: We decided Harry Potter…

Ben: We’re done.

Andrew: …take a week off. This is 57. You know, 56 shows under our belt. It’s time, it’s time, it’s time, Micah, for you to update us…

Ben: We’re almost senior citizens.

Andrew: [laughs] …with the past week’s top Harry Potter news stories.


News


Micah: Um, Andrew? This is a missing episode. There isn’t any news. So, that’s all the news, wink wink, for this September 18th, 2006 edition of MuggleCast. Back to the show.


Welcome Back, Kevin!


Andrew: Okay. Thank you, Micah. Guys, you know, it struck me the other day.

Kevin: What struck you?

Andrew: We rely too much on… Oh by the way, by the way, how could we go any further? Kevin Steck, welcome back to the show!

Kevin: Yeah, its been awhile.

Ben: [impersonating Kevin] Thanks, Andrew. I have really missed my presence on the show.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: How long has it been, Kevin?

Kevin: What, six weeks now?

Ben: [impersonating Kevin] At least four weeks. Something like that.

Andrew: Four weeks? That’s it?

Jamie: It’s been a long time.

Kevin: I think it’s longer than that.

Andrew: Yeah, I think it was longer than that.

Jamie: Have you lost your touch yet, Kevin?

Ben: [impersonating Kevin] It’s been a 100 years or nothing. No.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Kevin, where have you been?

Kevin: School. School started.

Ben: [impersonating Kevin] At a wedding. [laughs]

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: At weddings. It was a wedding one week, wasn’t it?

Ben: [laughs] Kevin and the ladies.

Kevin: I know. I only had three of them this summer.

[Jamie laughs]

Jamie: Kevin couldn’t go to his own wedding because he had a wedding to go to.

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: Isn’t that right, Kevin? [laughs]

Kevin: Right.

Ben: We missed you, buddy.

Andrew: Yeah.

Jamie: We have. Welcome back, Kevin.

Andrew: We missed your voice, we missed your technical insight…

Jamie: Jokes.

Andrew: Missed everything about you, so welcome back.


MuggleCast on MySpace and Facebook


Andrew: Anyway, it struck me the other day: We rely too much on MuggleNet to promote the show.

Ben: Oh, really?

Andrew: I think so, because look at communities like MySpace. MySpace has 50 million people.

Jamie: Actually, I think it can have more than that now.

Andrew: MuggleCast – or MuggleNet – only gets 25 million. We are missing half of the MySpace audience.

Ben: [laughs] Yeah.

Andrew: That’s huge. Just imagine how many Harry Potter visitors are on MySpace.

Ben: I know.

Andrew: So, this is the reason why we have created a MuggleCast MySpace: to help promote the show, get the word out, and get you guys interacting with each other. So, visit MySpace.com/MuggleCastFans or just go to MuggleCast.com for a link, and join up, help promote the show, and it’s going to be pretty neat-o. We already got a lot of friend requests. It’s pretty cool seeing pictures of everybody, because remember you’re an attractive bunch!

Ben: [laughs] Yeah.

Andrew: And we also got a Facebook group. You can join in. This is all to help promote the show and you know…

Jamie: Yeah, that’s really good, Andrew. That’s a good one, that one. Yeah, yeah.

Andrew: Ummm.

Kevin: Allow stalkers to enter our world.

Andrew: I’m doing this hand motion right now, but I can’t put my – forget it.

Jamie: This is good stuff. This is good stuff

Andrew: Forget it, I’m done. I am done. Anyway…

Kevin: Go post a video of the hand motions.


Announcement: The 60-inch Subway Challenge


Andrew: Ben and Jamie, you guys got an announcement.

Jamie: We do.

Ben: A major announcement.

Jamie: Okay, it kind of… I think it started one day when I was hungry in the morning and I went to Subway and I got a 12-inch Subway melt and a 12-inch tuna for later on, so I could eat it later. So, I came home, I had the melt, then about four hours later or something like that, I had the tuna thing. And I got online and said to Ben, “Ben, I’ve just had 24 inches in one day, don’t you think that’s impressive?” Ben then made a comment back to me, “It’s okay, but I’ve had 36.” Now, we always want to go one better than, you know, what we’ve done. So…

Ben: Yeah, of course. Everything’s a competition with us. So… [laughs]

Jamie: Exactly, yes. We thought, let’s go to 48, but of course, why go to 48, if you can go to 60? So, that’s our challenge for California. We’re going to do the 60-inch Subway Challenge.

Ben: Each of us.

Jamie: Hopefully, this is going to increase… Yeah, yeah, each of us. Hopefully, this is going to increase by 12 inches every time we go on…

Ben: One of these trips.

Jamie: …one of these trips. So, if we’re still doing live Podcasts in 2020, we will be doing the 1,024-inch Challenge…

Ben: [laughs] Yeah.

Jamie: …which could get a little bit difficult by then, but we could be more experienced. So, and Ben, are we going to record it and do everything so we can get it online?

Ben: Well, if Andrew brings his video camera, we will.

Jamie: Okay, Andrew bring your video camera.

Andrew: Okay. Let’s record it and we’ll put a video up. I don’t… You’re going to eat, what, four, five different times of the day?

Jamie: It’s a… Yeah, yeah.

Ben: Five times in one day.

Jamie: We’re going to do it in one…

Kevin: Oh, it’s not in one sitting?

Andrew: Okay.

Ben: No.

Kevin: Awww.

Ben: That would be kind of hard.

Jamie: Yes, Kevin, yes. We’ll eat 60 inches in one…

[Everyone laughs]

Kevin: I think it would be impressive.

Andrew: I don’t even think Jamie is 60 inches tall.

Kevin: I think it would be impressive.

Andrew: I don’t think he’d be able to…

Ben: I don’t know, I don’t think Jamie could handle it. That’s the problem.

Jamie: [laughs] Okay, Ben, and you could? You’re going to have 60 inches of Subway?

Ben: Well, see, another thing – this reminds me. This is definitely going to be a daunting task. The other day I failed at a similar challenge in my…

Jamie: What was it?

Ben: …pre-calc class. I bet the teacher…

Kevin: A prize-getter.

Ben: …I could drink four cans of soda in…

[Jamie laughs]

Ben: …one minute and…

Jamie: Clearly, you can’t do that.

Kevin: Oh, geez. Yeah.

Ben: No, hold on, hold on. I got three down in forty seconds.

Jamie: That’s not bad at all.

Ben: And I took a look at that Dr. Pepper and I about passed out and…

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: …then I went to the sink and I threw up. So…

Jamie: [laughs] Awesome.

Ben: You know what? In California we’ll go for four in a minute. We’ll get a video of that, too. We’ll put it up on YouTube.

Andrew: That sounds fun.

Ben: Four cans of soda.

Jamie: What, four 60-inch Subways in a minute?

Ben: Yeah. [laughs] No, four cans of soda.

Jamie: Now that would be impressive.

Kevin: I would rather see a gallon of milk in five minutes.

Ben: An hour – it’s impossible.

Micah: Wait, Jamie?

Jamie: Yeah?

Micah: They have Subways in England?

Jamie: They do. But, unfortunately, I can’t set up a webcam linked to Ben’s Subway, so I could do mine and he can do his so, in a way, it’s in California.

[Everyone laughs]

Micah: No, I’m just surprised fast food chains existed there.

Andrew: How about we make a poll on MuggleCastFan.net and let people decide who will win the competition.

Jamie: No, because clearly Ben is going to win it.

Andrew: Well, then why are you in it?

Jamie: No, no. It isn’t a competition, it’s a competition generally just to do 60 inches in one day.

Andrew: Oh, I thought it was you guys versus each other. Oh, all right.

Jamie: No, no, no, no. Basically, we’re going to space it out and have one at, sort of, 8 AM, one at 11 AM, one at 3 PM, one at… And just go on like that and kind of space it out. So, it should be fun and we’ll put it online, as well.


Leaky Mug Live in California


Andrew: Moving along, Leaky Mug Live in California – it is only four days away from today. And we’re pretending like today…

Jamie: No it’s not.

Andrew: …is Sunday…

Jamie: Oh, yeah. [laughs]

Andrew: …the 24th. It’s only four days away. Hey, guys, we’re in England now. I mean, California.

Jamie: Oh, we are. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Andrew: It’s been pretty cool, hasn’t it? It’s been fun. Yeah.

Ben: [sings] California.

Kevin: We’re all having a blast.

Andrew: Sunny weather…

Jamie: I’ve had a blast so far, yeah.

Kevin: Yep.

Andrew: Yeah.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: I can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings. Leaky Mug Live in California, September 28th at 7 PM at the Borders in Westwood. It’s going to be a ton of fun.

Jamie: [raps the “ Fresh Prince of Bellaire” theme song] West Philadelphia, born and raised, in the playground where I would spend most of my days. Sorry.

Andrew: Yeah. It’s going to be a ton of fun and we’re looking forward to meeting everyone. If you’re in California, if you’re anywhere on the West Coast, just come out. It’s a quick drive.

Jamie: If you’re anywhere in the world, come out.

Ben: Okay, California is the west coast, Andrew.

Jamie: [laughs] Yeah!

Andrew: Well, the mid-west or the west.

Ben: Yeah, so…

Andrew: Come out to California.

Jamie: If you’re anywhere, if you’re anywhere, come and see us, please.

Andrew: Yeah. If you’re in China.

Jamie: If you’re China, if you’re in Australia…

Andrew: Come out, it’s going to be a lot of fun. We’re probably not doing another live Podcast for a while, so this is your last, well…

Ben: This is the Leaky Mug Farewell Tour.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Don’t tell people that. Like those bands do; they always come back.

Andrew: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jamie: [laughs] Yeah. We’ll re-group after awhile


Listener Rebuttal: Correction on Invisibility Cloak


Andrew: Moving along, Listener Rebuttals this week. First, we start off with a correction. We got tons of feedback on this. I know, we’re sorry.

Ben: We screwed up.

Andrew: James inherited the Invisibility Cloak…

Kevin: Yeah.

Andrew: …from his father, not his mother, like we wanted – speculated. This came from an AOL interview that JK Rowling did back in October, 2000.

Jamie: I think what Andrew’s trying to say, in not so many words, is that we got it completely, completely wrong.

Andrew: Yeah, we just didn’t know. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah. We can’t, you know?

Andrew: So, there you go.


Listener Rebuttal: Homeschooling


Andrew: Moving on to emails now, Holly, 17, of North Bay. Where’s North
Bay?

Jamie: A bay that’s in the north.

Ben: Probably New Jersey.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, yeah it is, yeah.

Andrew: Kevin, I got the IP address. Trace this for me while I…

Ben: [impersonating Kevin] Kevin!

Jamie: Just get Kevin to do it and in two seconds we’ll have a full match on…

Kevin: Oh do you want me to?

Andrew: Yes. It’s 69…

Kevin: Hold on one sec, let me…

Ben: Don’t say it out loud. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, don’t.

Andrew: I’m going to edit it out. I’m going to edit it out! 69.159…

Jamie: Hey, Ben, if you give Kevin the IP address in two minutes…

Kevin: Dot what? What was the last…

Andrew: Dot 2.

Jamie: …you have a full plan of their house, when they were born, what they eat for breakfast.

Andrew: Okay.

Jamie: He’s that good.

[Ben laughs]

Andrew: This rebuttal concerns the homeschooling discussion we had last week: Wait a second: I’m listening to MuggleCast #56, and Jamie’s trying to argue that you can’t teach yourself Calculus. Well, I’m in first year university, and my Calculus teacher doesn’t speak English (his Russian accent is really, really, really, really, thick to the point we can’t understand a word).

Jamie: That’s pretty thick.

Andrew: So we (i.e. everyone in my class) can’t learn Calculus from anyone else. So I (and everyone else) have to teach myself Calculus from the textbook and I’m learning it by myself.

Kevin: Oh, that sucks.

Andrew: This is the same as my Discrete Math class (I’m a math major), and it’s really complex math, and my teacher doesn’t speak English, so I’m teaching it to myself. We don’t have a choice! We have to teach it to ourselves. So, if Hogwarts was shut down, it would be just like having a teacher who doesn’t speak English, you’re pretty much on your own. We can do it! So, wizards and witches can, too!

To a point.

Jamie: Didn’t I argue that you could?

Andrew: Yeah, I think she meant Ben.

Jamie: Okay, Ben.

Ben: Yeah, but no, I still completely disagree. You’re not going to get…

Andrew: Hold on, hold on…

Jamie: Ben…

Andrew: Hold on. Let’s not start this again. Let’s not start this again.

[Everyone talking over each other]

Ben: Listen. Listen. Shut up. Let me speak, Kevin.

[Kevin laughs]

Ben: She’s not going to be able to teach herself Calculus as quickly or as
good as if she had an instructor.

Andrew: That’s a fair point.

Kevin: Einstein did it.

Ben: Oh yeah, and Einstein is the average college student.

Andrew: Steve…

[Everyone laughs]

Kevin: But you can’t speak for the person writing in.

Jamie: Yeah.


Listener Rebuttal: Homeschooling Part Two


Andrew: Steve Danison, 18, from Albany, NY also writes about homeschooling.

Jamie: But we haven’t finished. [laughs] Sorry.

Andrew: Well, it’s the same. I do not believe home schooling is an option because in order to be homeschooled, the students would have to be allowed to use magic outside of Hogwarts, which we know is not allowed. Okay?

I believe if Hogwarts is closed, there will be no schooling of any sorts, unless the students were to be sent to another school, which is unlikely. So, yeah.

That’s a good point, Ben. Can’t argue with that one.

Jamie: But, but…

Micah: I can.

Kevin: I think an exception would be made.

Jamie: They could change it, though.

Kevin: Yeah.

Micah: Yeah, exactly.

Andrew: They could change it, but at the current time, right now…

Ben: In time of war they’re going to change it. That’s true, also.

Kevin: Yeah.


Listener Rebuttal: Homeschooling Part Three


Andrew: Darren, 39, from Columbus, Ohio also writes about homeschooling:
The ability to learn without teachers does depend on the student.
Examples: Newton invented Calculus. No one taught him. Number two: Hermione
performed several spells before the first year. Number three: Hermione made
the Polyjuice Potion long before it was taught. Number four: Fred and George created the swap, which was new magic. Number five: Marauder’s Map, not something that would be taught. Number six: Horcrux, who taught Voldy to split his soul?

Jamie: Slughorn, Slughorn, Slughorn.

Andrew: In the end we take what we know and expand on it. This is learning without teachers.

Jamie: This is why…

Ben: Yes, I know, I know. And he makes a good point. But I’m saying you have to
establish a base. When you have first years that are going in there, they
have to actually have some basis for learning, they can’t just be able to
jump straight into advanced magic, they have to have…

Jamie: But, Ben…

Ben: …established the building blocks.

Jamie: This is why the best students are always the people who go off and
read for themselves and learn themselves on top of everything they do. I’m not saying that – you’re right that you need a base, which is why you couldn’t teach yourself at Kindergarten, you know, because you need somebody who can teach you the basics, but once you’re there you can build on it, and so I think they could do that at wizarding school. [laughs] That sounded so bad. What a weak argument.

Ben: Yeah, that was pretty bad.

[Ben and Jamie laugh]

Jamie: That was terrible!


Name Intros: A Little Late


Andrew: I just realized we never did our name intros.

Jamie: Oh, yeah.

Andrew: The show never began.

Kevin: Oh well, they know who we are.

Andrew: Start, rewind. I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Kevin: I’m Kevin Steck.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.


Listener Rebuttal: Lily’s Invisibility Cloak?


Andrew: All right, now that we got that out of the way, next rebuttal, Jamie? [laughs]

Jamie: It’s from Amy, 24, from Durham, but not the Durham I go to. And I…

Andrew: Awww, I got excited for a second.

Jamie: So did I, so did I. We can meet up.

Ben: Do you mean that second rate UK university?

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Oooh.

Jamie: Yes, thank you, Benjamin, thank you, Benjamin. Ben, remind me how much you pay for college each year. Go on, just tell me. Just tell me.

Ben: I am not in college yet, but it will be pretty expensive.

Jamie: Ben, you will be in college. Oh, right.

Ben: Well then, I can think how cheap your second rate education is.

[Everyone laughs]

Jamie: It’s better than your education.

Ben: Ooo…

Kevin: That’s why Stephen Hawking is a teacher at Oxford.

Jamie: He is.

Kevin: He is.

Jamie: Actually, he isn’t. Well, he was at Cambridge.

Kevin: Oh wait, is he?

Ben: I’m sorry, guys.

Kevin: Get your facts right. Get your facts right.

Kevin: Oh, you’re right.

Andrew: An e-mail…

Ben: Us dumb Americans. Dumb Americans.

[Andrew laughs]

Kevin: Oh yeah, how can I get that wrong?

Jamie: Kevin. Kevin, Gonville and Caius College, Cambridge. Get it right. Get it right. Can we get back to this, or are we just going to dwell on this?

Andrew: Yeah, go.

Jamie: On Ben’s second rate education, not mine.

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: Okay. This is Amy, 24, from Durham, North Carolina. She says: Hi, I’ve been listening to your show for some weeks now but finally decided to send in a comment today. In your discussion about James’ cloak (in 56), you touched on the point that the cloak might be Lily’s (and refuted it later but not completely). I think that the cloak cannot belong to Lily, because Dumbledore said that the cloak belonged to James and as we all know, Dumbledore was as precise in what he says.

Andrew: And Jo proved us wrong.

Ben: Yeah, we already got owned on this one.

Jamie: Yeah, we did. Well, why don’t we just be owned again since we did screw up. Come on.

Andrew: The point of this rebuttal is the last two paragraphs. PS.

Jamie: Okay. Also, the mundane reason (as you mentioned) why Dumbledore had the cloak can be that James left it with him to be used by the Order (given the fact that cloaks are rare), and Dumbledore could not return it back to the Potters before they died because he did not know who the Secret-Keeper was. Given Dumbledore’s role in safeguarding the Potters, and Wormtail’s character, I think there was very little time lost between his being Secret-Keeper and Voldemort arriving at the Potters’ doorstep. Dumbledore could not have also been present at the time of the Potters’ death, as apart from the fact that he could not have just stood by, he would also need to have known who was the Secret-Keeper for that. He would have been told in some format directly by Wormtail, and then he could have given the evidence against Sirius later.

Andrew: [correcting Jamie] Not have.

Jamie: What do you guys think?

Andrew: He could not have.

Jamie: Sorry? Oh yeah, “and he could not have given the evidence against Sirius later.”

Andrew: I think that’s a very interesting theory.

Jamie: You didn’t hear a word?

[Andrew and Jamie laugh]

Andrew: No. I read it. That’s why it’s in there.

Jamie: After all I said Andrew, you just thought you’d say that?

Andrew: No. I think it’s an interesting theory.

Jamie: Anyone else?

Andrew: That’s all I had to say. [laughs]

Jamie: Anymore slightly more detailed comments? [laughs]

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: No?

Andrew: Is that bad? [laughs]

Jamie: No, that was excellent. Good. Excellent. Well done, everyone. Well done, everyone.

Andrew: Okay.

Jamie: The discussion this week is clearly up to scratch as usual.

Andrew: Well, you usually have something to add.

Jamie: Well, I was reading it.

[Andrew and Jamie laugh]

Andrew: I know. Go ahead, read the next one.


Listener Rebuttal: Dumbledore Gave The Cloak to Hagrid?


Jamie: Okay. Well, sorry, Amy. No one has any comments at all, which is bad. Okay, this is from Vanessa, 25, from California. Hope you’re coming to the podcast.

I wonder if Dumbledore gave the Cloak to Hagrid to use, perhaps to “overhear” Wormtail giving access to Godric’s Hollow, because he had to know the secret location to go in and rescue Harry.

That brings up an interesting point.

Ben: Is the Cloak even big enough to fit Hagrid, though? [laughs]

Jamie: No, no. [laughs]

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Jamie: It would cover, like, one hand or something. Okay, that does bring up an interesting point, though. If you hear somebody telling somebody the location, do you know it, because they weren’t actually telling you and, apparently, you have to be told. It has to be a conscience effort on the part of the Secret Keeper to tell you the location. So, but anyway:

Obviously, Sirius’ motorcycle couldn’t be hidden with the Cloak along with Hagrid, and it’s almost too much to consider it could even cover Hagrid…

There you go!

…alone except that Harry, Ron, and Hermione can all fit underneath it together. The only problem with this is, Dumbledore always thought the Secret Keeper had been Sirius all the way until Prisoner of Azkaban. If Hagrid knew who the Secret Keeper was, wouldn’t he have passed that information along?

Anyone have any comments?

Ben: Of course he would’ve.

Jamie: Assuming he knew, of course.

Ben: Yeah, but I think you can’t…

Jamie: You can’t assume that he knew.

Ben: Yeah. I don’t know.

Micah: Well, I think it goes back to exactly what she said in terms of him having in his possession at the time that James died.

Jamie: Yeah.

Micah: I think its more important that he had it physically on him in some capacity when the event took place. Like, I’m not saying that he’s responsible in any way for what happened, but it makes it seem like, almost, Dumbledore shouldn’t have had it in his possession at that time, that it should have been used for something else.

Andrew: Hmmm.

Jamie: Hmmm. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah, that sounds right. Someone else read the next one.


Listener Rebuttal: Petunia and the Invisibility Cloak


Andrew: This leads into our main discussion, which is why we have it in here. Sort of leads in. Evelyn, 41, of Woodstock, Canada, eh?, talks about – also talks about the Invisibility Cloak.

Regarding the Invisibility Cloak, I believe it is because of Petunia that Dumbledore has the Cloak. Petunia, although she loathed the wizarding world, did love her sister. Petunia went to Godric’s Hollow…

Now, this is her theory: Petunia went to Godric’s Hollow on that fateful night to try and convince her sister to leave James and the wizarding world behind. When Voldemort shows up, James, or perhaps Lily, covers Petunia with the Cloak, since she has no magical means to protect herself. Petunia watches in horror as first James, then Lily are killed. She also observes the curse which backfired on Voldemort and watches him flee, close to death. A short while later, Snape (who of course is one of the good guys) shows up to try to warn the Potters that they are in danger (having extracted this information from the traitor, Wormtail). Obviously he was too late, but Petunia recounts exactly what happened. Together, Snape and Petunia retell the dreadful tale to Dumbledore. It is because of Petunia’s eye-witness account of Snape trying to warn the Potters that Dumbledore trusts Snape. Dumbledore also took the invisibility cloak from Petunia and modified her memory so she has no recollection of these horrific events.”

Jamie: Can I just add that after this happened, Snape and Petunia lived happily ever after.

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: Until the end of time. And they’re still together.

[Andrew hums dramatically]

Jamie: That is very interesting though.

Kevin: Yeah it sounds pretty…

Andrew: Well, I thought…

Kevin: …possible.

Andrew: Yeah, I thought it was kind of cool.

Micah: It’s a good theory, but again it would go back to the fat that James or Lily had the Invisibility Cloak…

Jamie: Yeah, exactly.

Micah: …in their possession. And she clearly states…

Jamie: And also…

Micah: …that Dumbledore does. Unless she’s talking more generically. That’s – I think that she needs to be more specific. Because at the time of his death could be a generic…

Jamie: Yeah, and also…

Micah: …period of time. As oppose to the specific event – sorry.

Jamie: Also… Oh, no, its fine. Also, how much did Petunia care about Lily?

Andrew: Well, that’s the thing because this is where her whole theory stems from. Now, according to this rebuttal, she says that Petunia did love her sister.

Kevin: Yeah, I don’t…

Andrew: Now, I don’t know if that is fact…

Kevin: Yeah, I think it’s just an assumption.

Andrew: …because I don’t remember really that. This is just part of her theory. However, as a sister, you would think you would always have underlying love for her. About her sister.

Jamie: Yeah, I guess but, she didn’t talk very highly of her, you know, normally. So, I don’t know.

Andrew: Well, not now. But I mean, I talk trash on my sister every single day.

Jamie: You still lover her don’t you Andrew?

Ben: You still think she’s hot.

[Andrew sighs in annoyance]

Jamie: Yeah [laughs]

Andrew: No.

[Andrew and Micah laughs]

Andrew: No, I don’t. And I never did say that. so I don’t know what you’re talking about.

[Awkward pause].

Andrew: Oh, okay. “PS…I love your show and listen to it regularly. Today is my birthday and it would be a great birthday present to get a mention on air!!!! Although I already feel that this theory which just ‘fell into my head today’ is birthday present enough. Keep up the great work. It keeps all of us Harry Potter fans occupied while we not-so-patiently await Book Seven.”

So, Happy Birthday Evelyn of Canada.

Ben: [singing] Happy Birthday to you!


Main Discussion: Petunia Dursley


Andrew: And this does lead into our Main Discussion this week which is Petunia Dursley.

Jamie: But what about …

Andrew: A character…

Jamie: But what about Dumbledore’s will?

Andrew: I’m moving that because…

Jamie: That’s very funny though.

Andrew: …the rebuttal.

Jamie: Oh, right.

Andrew: What? The will? Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah, it’s quite funny.

Andrew: It’s clever.

Jamie: When are you reading it? You reading it later?

Andrew: After. After the discussion.

Jamie: Okay, cool.

Andrew: Character Discussion on Petunia Dursley; we haven’t done one of these in a while. Aunt Petunia: aged around her thirties or forties. Petunia is a tall and gaunt with blonde hair and an almost abnormally long neck. She has a long bony horse like fee with long teeth and large blue eyes. Petunia is nosey and likes to gossip. She has a shrill voice, and a brisk, snappish manner. She is an immaculate housekeeper and keeps her home (number four, Privet Drive) spotless. Petunia despises magic or abnormality in any form and likes to act as though the magical world does not exist. But there are some strange things going on with Petunia.

Jamie: There are.

Andrew: And that’s what we’re going to discuss today.

Micah: She sounds like quite a catch.

[Jamie and Andrew laughs]

Jamie: She does.

Andrew: Micah…

Jamie: I’d go on a date with her.

Andrew: …got a little thing for her?


Petunia The Squib


Micah: Yeah, All right. So, one of the biggest questions surrounding Aunt Petunia is, is she a Squib? And from JKR’s own website she said Aunt Petunia has never performed magic nor will she ever be able to do so. If Petunia…

Jamie: But she hasn’t said – sorry, sorry.

Micah: No, go ahead.

Jamie: I was going to say that she hasn’t specifically said that that she is a Squib though.

Ben: That she isn’t a Squib or she is.

Micah: That’s an interesting point.

Jamie: No, I mean, she has dodged the word basically…

Kevin: Yeah, she…

Jamie: On purpose it looks like. She says “she hasn’t ever performed magic nor will she be able to do so.”

Kevin: But a Squib can…

Jamie: That could be due to – that could be due to emotional trauma, you know, like when Tonks couldn’t transform herself after the death of Sirius. You know it could be that she’s never been able to perform magic because she hates the thought of being abnormal in her world, so she can’t, you know, bring herself to do it, and she won’t ever be able to do it because she won’t ever be able to get over the thought of being abnormal in her world. So, she could be completely magical but she just can’t do it.

Micah: But, I mean, that is almost the direct definition of a squib, if you look it up.

Jamie: No, no, no, no, I thought that a squib was somebody who was a non-magical person. So, with all their heart they could not perform magic.

Micah: Right, but, and JKR has specifically said she has never performed magic, nor will she ever be able to do so.

Jamie: No, but what I’m saying is that there is a difference between being magical and not being able to do magic and not actually, you know, having the requirements in yourself to do magic. Does that make sense, or not?

Kevin: I think it makes sense. I mean…

Ben: I don’t know.

Kevin: She can have, like, a magic background, but not be able to perform the actual magic.

Jamie: Exactly, exactly. You could have… It’s like this… It’s like… Okay, okay, this is a very weird…

Kevin: Analogy?

Jamie: Yeah, analogy, but say you have got roller skates on, okay? You are capable of roller skating, but you could be so scared of falling over that you could – you cannot do it and you won’t be able to do it because you can’t get over your fear. That’s different to somebody who doesn’t have roller skates on, so clearly could not ever roller skate because they don’t have the tools to roller skate.

Micah: Okay.

Jamie: Make of it what you will. Make of it what you will.

Micah: So, you’re saying it’s more of her own will that she’s not – never able to do it, as opposed to her…

Jamie: Yeah, precisely. But…

Andrew: But is she a witch or is she a Squib?

Jamie: I’m not saying that, but she could be magical though. JKR… That looks like she’s dodged the Squib issue, by saying that. You know she hasn’t actually said she is not a Squib, she’s saying that she hasn’t performed magic.

Micah: I think that if anything, it proves that she possibly could be a Squib. Doesn’t it?

Jamie: No, because it just says that she hasn’t performed magic and she won’t be able to perform magic, not that she does not have the ability to do magic.

Andrew: But that’s not the definition of Squib.

Jamie: No, I thought that a squib was a non-magical person. They cannot do…

Andrew: Born of Muggle or wizard parents.

Jamie: Yeah. Look at it like this, a wand does not perform spells. There’s something inside you that the wand acts as a catalyst for that causes the spell to come out, which is why you can do magic without a wand. If Petunia – sorry, if a Squib pointed a wand and learned all the spells in the world it wouldn’t matter because they don’t have that thing inside them that is put through the wand and turns into the spell, you know? It’s like that whereas – that’s a squib, whereas a person who just cannot do magic, perhaps due to emotional trauma, as I said, is somebody who does have that thing inside them, but is unable to channel it, for reasons of, I don’t know, you know? Emotion, morality, you know? Fear, something like that and that could be Petunia, instead of her being a Squib. I mean, I’m not saying she is like that, but it is a possibility, considering how Jo’s worded it.

Andrew: Yeah.

Micah: No, I understand what you’re saying and Andrew just brought up the next part of it is, if Petunia were a Squib it would mean that her family was magical, but we’re told in fact that Lily was Muggle-born.

Jamie: Wait, so…

Andrew: So, okay, so that answers the question.

Micah: Well if JKR is telling us the truth. Which she…

Andrew: Of course she is. Well, why would she lie to us?

Jamie: Because she hates us.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: [In a sad voice] She wouldn’t do that to me, would she?

Jamie: So wait, you’d be saying that if she’s a squib her entire family would be wizards and witches?

Micah: Well, one of them would have to be.

Andrew: Yeah.

Micah: One of her parents would have to be.

Jamie: Yes, you’re right. Oh yeah. I don’t know. Yes, that’s true. But Lily was Muggle-born, right? So…

Andrew: But that can’t be…

Jamie: So, she couldn’t be a Squib.

Andrew: Yeah. Right, right. So…

Jamie: My theory holds some weight. Maybe?


What Is So Surprising About Petunia?


Micah: So, if she’s not a squib and she’s not a witch, what information are we going to learn about her in Book 7 that’s so revealing, so surprising?

Kevin: She’s half a house-elf.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: It must be something that she knows.

Jamie: Of course it is.

Andrew: There must be some little factoid that she knows that she’ll have to tell Harry.

Ben: Well, she’s already – we’ve already seen that she has quite a bit of knowledge of the magical world that we didn’t know about, like with the Dementor and stuff. So…

Jamie: Oh yeah, precisely.

Ben: There’s more to Petunia than meets the eye. I think Jo said that actually.

Micah: She did, so to me that means there is more to her, as opposed to what she knows.

Jamie: Yeah, but she clearly does know something that, you know…

Ben: That’s – that we don’t know. [laughs]

Jamie: Yeah, exactly. Wow, that’s a big step we’ve taken there, isn’t it?

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: That is a big revelation, yeah.

Jamie: One small step for MuggleCast, one giant leap for Harry Potter fans.

Andrew: Well, that’s the thing. That is why we included that rebuttal this week because she’s suggesting that Petunia actually was at Godric’s Hollow and she saw all this going down, and might connect the cloak.

Jamie: [sings] Down, down in an earlier round, And Sugar, we’re going down swinging.

Ben: I don’t think that’s true.

Andrew: Then what do you think is true, Ben?

Ben: I don’t think that made sense. If Dumbledore was given the cloak before James’ death by James, why would Petunia have it after he died?

Jamie: Yeah, I don’t know about that. But, I don’t know.

Andrew: She sort of explained her theory, but nonetheless. All right, move along, Micah.

Ben: [sings] Move along.


Familial Love


Micah: All right, do you think that she has any type of feelings for Harry and did she love her sister? This kind of goes back to what we brought up before.

Andrew: Uhhh…

Ben: Harry/Petunia shippers.

[Awkward silence]

Jamie: Ugh. She clearly – I don’t think you can say that she is completely emotionless towards him. She’s got to feel something, and clearly when she says…

Kevin: I think she…

Andrew: Well, she sort of has to.

Ben: I think it’s a big facade because Vernon is around, you know?

Kevin: Yeah.

Jamie: Yeah, yeah.

Andrew: Right, yeah.

Jamie: In Book Five when she says, “The boy has to stay…”

Ben: Yeah.

Jamie: It’s clearly because of Dumbledore has told her about, but it just seems that there is something else there as well. She doesn’t want to turn him off into the streets like Vernon does. She hasn’t ever been the person who says, “Out, out, get out.” She’s always just been hiding behind her husband.

Andrew: I think the problem is that she can’t.

Jamie: Why? Because of the – yeah.

Andrew: Because of Dumbledore’s “remember my last”, and all that, and the Dursley house having some sort of magical, staying close to the bloodline, and all that. I just don’t think she can kick him out.

Jamie: Oh yeah, I think that’s probably right.

Andrew: And obviously, she had to convince Vernon somehow. There must have been more to it than just, “Vernon, he stays.”

Jamie: [laughs] Yeah.

Andrew: Isn’t that what she said in Order of the Phoenix?

Jamie: Yeah, she did, yeah.

Andrew: As for loving Lily, you have to have some sort of love for your sister.

[Jamie laughs]

Andrew: She’s family.

Kevin: She can be as mad as possible with her, but she still has to have some sort of emotion towards her sister.

Andrew: Grow up, Jamie.

Jamie: Oh yeah, oh yeah, definitely.


Petunia’s Magical Knowledge


Micah: Okay, so we’ve seen in the past books that she does have some knowledge of the magical world. Where does her knowledge of things such as Dementors and the severity of Voldemort and him coming back come from? Would she really have spent enough time around James and Lily to know about this stuff?

Kevin: Well, I was thinking that Lily was going to Hogwarts as well. So, she came home on the summers.

Ben: Well actually in Book Five we saw – Petunia said that she heard Lily say it to him, and him was Harry’s father. So, that’s how she found out about the Dementors. So, it’s likely that she could have acquired some more information simply by overhearing it.

Kevin: Yeah, exactly. I mean, Lily was home every summer, so you would assume that she would snoop a bit. You know?

Jamie: Yeah, she must have heard them, or picked up a book or something.

Andrew: Right. Yeah. She had to be curious. Of you hated… Yeah. If you hated this whole magical ability so much, you have to be curious as to learn more about it.

Jamie: Yeah. Didn’t George Washington say, “We’re always curious about the things we hate”?

Andrew: Probably.

[Kevin laughs]

Jamie: [laughs] I just made that up.

Andrew: I don’t think there’s anything else to add to that. [aside to self] Where does her knowledge of things such as Dementors and the severity of Voldemort’s return come from?

Jamie: No, no. I think that’s about it.

Micah: As far as Voldemort, I think she’s pretty aware of the fact that he killed her sister and James.

Jamie: Well, exactly. Yeah, she must have asked questions about that. She doesn’t just…

Micah: And not to mention, I’m sure, whatever was in Dumbledore’s letter…

Kevin: Yeah, and she had obvious contact with Dumbledore.


Petunia Seals The Magical Bond


Micah: …clearly. Okay, this is actually an interesting question. What does Jo mean by “never performing magic”? Clearly by providing her place of residence, she’s sealing the ancient magic that keeps Harry safe while he is under age. Is Jo being careful with her wording here, as she so often does?

Jamie: Haven’t we just discussed this?

Micah: Yeah, but I think…

Andrew: Yeah, we sort of did in the beginning.

Micah: The question goes more towards – she is in a way performing magic because she’s saying…

Jamie: Oh, well, we can get into a huge discussion here.

[Micah laughs]

Jamie: No, because I was thinking, do you think this ancient magic, if you look at it kind of like one of the prophecies, okay? In the prophecies, a prophecy will only come true if, well, most prophecies, or some prophecies will only come true if under certain conditions in the prophecy are made. For example, the prophecy in Order of the Phoenix only came true because Voldemort only heard half of it and then marked Harry as an equal, thereby creating his own enemy. Now, it could be that Lily seals the magic – this ancient magic, just because she provides him residence. So, it could be in this spell – in this sort of incantation – the way this works it could be that Dumbledore creates this spell and he says that whatever and that this protection is given on Harry if so-and-so provides him a thing of welcome. So, it’s just a condition that she has to meet. It doesn’t require any magic, because she’s just fulfilling the terms of something else. She isn’t doing anything action, she’s being passive.

Micah: So she’s just part of the equation, that’s what you’re saying. Kevin?

Jamie: Exactly, yeah, I’m trying to say that. That is a much better succinct summary than my waffling on [laughs] about it when I didn’t actually say anything.

[Micah laughs]

Jamie: So yeah, she’s just leading the ancient magical equation, but not performing any magic of her own, I think.


Petunia and Horcruxes


Andrew: I just keep thinking about, what could this big revelation be? Because we’ve sort of come to the conclusion that – and I just don’t understand how this will come into a big play in Book Seven. The only thing I can think of is that Aunt Petunia has something that’s going to help Harry discover the final Horcruxes, or final Horcrux.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: Maybe Petunia’s a Horcrux.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah.

Jamie: She could be.

Andrew: So, Micah, you brought up last week that Jo is always very careful about her words. What do you think about this, the “never performing magic” line?

Micah: Well, I think Jamie was right before. You can interpret it two different ways. It’s either she chooses never to perform the magic, because she’s afraid of it, or she just doesn’t have the actual ability to do it. And I agree with him when he said that she’s more just part of the equation as far as the ancient magic is concerned. She doesn’t have the ability…

Jamie: Thanks, Micah.

Micah: …I don’t think to perform it. Yeah, no problem. [laughs]

Jamie: Your check’s in the post.


Dudley’s Greatest Fear


Micah: No problem. Now, this is something interesting. It kind of relates to Petunia. We’ve yet to really find out about Dudley’s greatest fear. We’re told we’ll find out about it in the final book. What possibly could he fear, and how do you guys think it relates to Aunt Petunia?

Ben: I don’t know. I hate to say this, but he grew up in one of those perfect childhoods, where it almost seems like he was molested.

Kevin: Awww…

Ben: That’s the only thing I can think of.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: I mean, in all honesty. What else could there be? He had a perfect life.

Jamie: No, he didn’t though. Well, he didn’t – he thinks he did. But as Dumbledore said in Half-Blood Prince, “at least you haven’t inflicted the damage that you’ve done to Dudley on Harry.” That kind of stuff, you know? So, perhaps there’s something that they’ve done to do something to him that would turn into his greatest fear. But, Abraham Lincoln did say, I think it was him, we have nothing to fear but fear itself. And he did actually say that. Perhaps he…

Ben: That was FDR. Not Lincoln.

Jamie: Okay, okay. Well, okay…

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: Well, at least I… At least I knew it was a president.

Andrew: I would think that his biggest fear is magic, is Harry casting a spell on him.

Jamie: That can’t be his biggest fear.

Kevin: No. Do you think…

Micah: No, I think…

Andrew: Why couldn’t he?

Jamie: If he looked into the Mirror of…

Ben: It had to be something inflicted by his parents.

Kevin: Do you think it’s… Do you think it’s possible that – I mean, Dudley has always had a hate of Harry, right? So, he knows that Harry is different in some way.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: Where did he find this out? He probably found it out from Petunia. Is it possible that she told him something about Harry to make him hate/fear something about Harry, and that’s why he’s always been…

Jamie: But, he’s just scared of him…

Andrew: Well, I’m sure they…

Jamie: …isn’t he? I mean…

Andrew: Yeah, and they probably would’ve made something up, like, “He can kill you if you…”

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: I mean it’s true, but…

Jamie: Well, perhaps he’s scared of death, then.

Micah: Yeah.

Jamie: If he – if he gets scared whenever Harry points his wand in his face…

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: …it could be that he’s scared of being killed. Ben, I was trying not to laugh there, and you’ve just started it off. [in a disapproving tone] Gah, gah, gah. No, it could just be that Dudley is scared of death in general, and he thinks that because he doesn’t understand magic, whenever Harry points his wand in his face, he thinks he’s going to Avada Kedavra him and kill him.

Micah: What about his parents being in trouble? What about Petunia and Vernon possibly being attacked in some way?

Jamie: Well, I think he’s obviously extremely reliant on his parents, so that could be big as well.

Micah: Or, even along the lines of what Kevin was saying, possibly something that Petunia knows that maybe Dudley has an idea about getting out.

Kevin: Yeah, that’s…

Micah: And people finding out…

Jamie: Oh, yeah.

Micah: …about Harry.

Jamie: Oh, yeah, perhaps.


Petunia and Sirius


Micah: Okay, this question kind of relates to what we talked about before in terms of her knowing more than she lets on, but it’s Vernon who seems to be shocked at the end of Prisoner of Azkaban when Harry informs him that Sirius is his godfather, not Petunia.

Ben: Well, it’s likely that Petunia already knew, then.

Jamie: Yeah, although – yeah. I think she probably did, because she must have been around when he was born. You know? And went to a christening and everything.

Micah: Sort of following up, did Petunia know Sirius? There are a lot of people out there who think that they knew each other pretty well, and it’s possible they even spent time together given that Lily was her sister and that Sirius was so close with James. And I’m sure that there were times where they all got together. I mean…

Jamie: They must have talked. It isn’t…

Andrew: Who? Petunia included?

Jamie: Huh? Well…

Andrew: Petunia included, Micah?


Petunia As A Child


Micah: Well, this kind of relates to the last point, what… [stumbles] what did Petunia do as a child? I mean, did she just hide whenever Lily had friends over? Because her parents, from what we’re told…

Andrew: Well…

Micah: …seem to be very welcoming to the whole idea of Lily being a witch.

Jamie: Yes. Yeah, they were. But…

Andrew: Her friends – her friends from Hogwarts?

Jamie: Yeah.

Andrew: Because, well, when Petunia is explaining to Harry what happened to Lily in Book One, isn’t – doesn’t she say something like they…

Jamie: Came home…

Andrew: Oh, wait. No.

Jamie: She came home transfiguring frogs into stuff.

Andrew: No, I was going to say that she ran off to school and that was the last they saw of her, but actually she said, “They ran – Lily and that boy ran off and got married…”

Jamie: Oh, yeah. Okay, yeah.

Andrew: “…and she never saw her again.” Never mind. Never mind. [sighs] I just can’t picture… I don’t see why that would go… Petunia would keep her distance.

Jamie: What? Oh, yeah. No, she would, but you know, when, I assume – how old were James and Lily when they got married, do you think, and had Harry?

Ben: Probably early twenties?

Jamie: Okay, well she must have… She can’t have not talked with them then. I mean, as a child, she was probably scared, but she, I mean, I assume that she’d observed niceties at that age and go to their wedding and, you know, speak to them and stuff, so I’m sure she talked to Sirius.

Micah: And I can’t remember, I just started rereading Prisoner of Azkaban, but I think when it’s on the TV that Sirius Black has gotten free from prison, she reacts in a very odd way. So…

Jamie: Yeah.

Micah: …this all goes back to her knowing more than she lets on.

Jamie: Yeah.

Micah: It’s just a question of how does she get this information. Is it information that she had previously, or is she getting fed this information, somehow?

Andrew: She couldn’t have been getting – it couldn’t have been fed to her. She has no connections inside – inside Hogwarts, or any magical world.

Ben: Well, what about Arabella Figg? The neighbor that’s kept Harry…

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: …all these years. Well, actually, Petunia – no, but they… She said that Petunia and Vernon don’t know because they wouldn’t want her – him to spend time with her if they knew that he was going to be having a good time, so that wouldn’t make sense.

Jamie: I agree.

Andrew: I don’t know. I just… I just don’t think that she could have a source other than overhearing Lily and James.

Jamie: Yup. Yup, yup, yup, yup, yup.


Last Days At Privet Drive


Micah: But I guess just to wrap it up real quick, it’s not even on here, what do you guys think is going to happen to her? Or even all of them as a whole?

Andrew: [laughs] I keep saying this. I just think she’s going to reveal something about Harry.

Ben: Yeah, she will.

Kevin: That’s got to be it.

Jamie: Yeah, she is.

Kevin: I don’t see anything happening to her, like, physically.

Micah: You don’t think the house is going to be attacked?

Kevin: I doubt it. No, I don’t see that happening. Why would they attack that – a house that they know Harry isn’t at?

Jamie: Yeah, exactly. I mean, it would send a message…

Ben: Because…

Jamie: …it would cause them to tighten their security, and it wouldn’t actually solve anything at all. I just don’t…

Kevin: And the only… The only day they’d ever attack is the last day that the – I guess the enchantment…

Jamie: Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

Kevin: …is on, you know? Once he… But I don’t see Harry being there that day, so [laughs]

Jamie: No, yeah.

Kevin: …who cares?

Micah: But didn’t Dumbledore say in the conversation that he has to return?

Kevin: Well, he…

Andrew: Until he’s 17.

Jamie: Until he’s 17.

Kevin: Yeah.

Jamie: One more summer.

Kevin: See, that’s the thing.

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: But even then…

Ben: Even then, he’d only be there shortly.

Kevin: The day he turns 17 is the day he leaves, so…

Ben: Well, say he doesn’t have to go back because the protection doesn’t matter anymore.

Kevin: Exactly.

Jamie: Dumbledore said that when he knew… Well, actually, actually perhaps he did know that he was going to die then. You know, if he planned it all with Snape, perhaps he knew then that he was going to die, so he told Harry to come back. Actually, perhaps he told Harry to come back, knowing full well that Harry wouldn’t go back, and he’d search for the Horcruxes and everything. I don’t know.

Ben: I don’t know. I’m not quite sure why he would do that, but…

Jamie: It just seems that if he. If we assume by that point that he had arranged with Snape – assuming that Snape’s good, of course – if he’d arranged with Snape then that he was going to die by then, I don’t know why he’d tell Harry to go back to the Dursley’s for one more summer. Because, I mean, he’s going to have to find the Horcruxes at some point, which means he’s going to have to put himself in direct danger.

Kevin: He’s going to have to leave, yeah.

Jamie: Exactly. So, delaying it for one summer seems pointless.

Ben: Right, and I don’t understand why that last summer would matter anyways, because school gets out in June…

Jamie: I know why it is.

Ben: …and his birthday is July 31st. So…

Jamie: I know why that is.

Ben: …they only have two months, anyways.

Jamie: It’s so he can home school himself and teach himself more than…

[Everyone laughs]

Micah: Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: …he can learn in school.

Micah: But that’s an interesting point, Jamie, that if he was planning everything out, it makes perfect sense that he would go and remind Petunia because he wouldn’t be there to do it himself in the end. So, Petunia still has a big question mark on her, but I think that’s the conclusion we came to. [laughs]


Top 10 Things on Dumbledore’s Will


Andrew: Last week, I brought up to everyone, well, I asked everyone to send in what Dumbledore has on his will. Because, I mean, come on, the guy’s pretty – he’s pretty big. He’s got to have something drawn out for everyone, so we have some entries. I’m going to read one right now. It’s from John of PA. He lists them, the Top 10 Things on Dumbledore’s Will. [reads]:

10. Lemon drops to Severus Snape. God knows, he could be a little less sour;

9. Old boxes of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans to Umbridge, wishing her the same fate;

8. The Pensieve I leave to Professor McGonagall, so someone has some sort of an understanding of what was going through my head. I’d leave it to Hagrid, but you know how free he is to share information;

7. All my books, I leave to Madame Pince’s restricted section so no one will ever be able to read them;

6. I leave my best mead to Professor Trelawney, so she doesn’t have to reek strictly of sherry;

5. I leave my ear muffs to Hagrid to go along with his umbrella;

4. To Ronald Weasley, I leave the first ever printed Chocolate Frog Card with my picture on it. Now you have seven of them;

3. For Hermione Granger, I leave all my gizmos and gadgets. You’re the only person who could ever possibly work them, anyway;

2. To Harry Potter, I leave Gaunt’s ring, just because I have nothing else to leave; and

1. To Dobby, I bequeath all my woolly socks.

Signed, Albus P.W.B. Dumbledore

Andrew: [finishes reading] And thank you, once again, to John from Pennsylvania.


MuggleCast’s Dating Service


Andrew: Moving on, as many people know, we like to help people out here on the show. Isn’t that right, Mr. Lawrence?

Jamie: We do.

Andrew: And we got this e-mail the other day, and we have to read it. Jamie, go for it.

Jamie: Okay, I will. Yeah, I will, yeah. So, this week, we have an e-mail from Aaron Nicholson, 15, from Nottingham, England, and he would like to ask one of our biggest fans, Sarah Bannister – Sarah, are you out there?

Andrew: [in girlish voice] Yes!

Jamie: He wants to ask if you will go out with him.

Andrew: [in girlish voice again] Yes, I will! Yaaay!

Jamie: Yeah, so please call him and tell him, “Yes,” because, you know, we don’t like unhappy relationships on this show. So, tell him yes…

Andrew: No way. Not at all.

Jamie: …that you’ve been waiting for him to ask you for years and years and years…

[Andrew laughs]

Jamie: …and finally you can profess your undying love to him.

Andrew: Awww.

Jamie: And you can both jog into the sunset, holding hands, living happily ever after…

Ben: Yeah. [laughs]

Jamie: …while still listening to the show on your iPods, of course.

Andrew: Remember your roots.

Jamie: Because you can’t forget us, the people who brought you together. So…

Andrew: You’re right.

Jamie: Please, Sarah, say, “Yes.” Please, Sarah.


Jamie’s British Joke of the Day


Andrew: [laughs] Jamie, you’ve also got a British Joke of the Day for us?

Jamie: I don’t have one. Oh, wait.

Andrew: What?

Jamie: Yes, I do.

Andrew: Oh, good.

Jamie: Yes, I do. It isn’t really a joke, but…

Andrew: What?

Jamie: But before, I was trying to make a kettle, but I just couldn’t quite get a handle on it.

[Andrew and Micah laugh]


Voicemail – The Number Three


Andrew: Oh, that’s too bad. Let’s hit up the voice mails, and then we’ll get out of here. Here comes the first one, right now.

[Audio]: Hey, MuggleCasters! This is Nicole from Iowa City. I love the show, especially when Ben broadcasts [laughs] from weird places. I have a question for you guys: According to Dumbledore on page 426 of PoA, US edition, Trelawney has given two known prophecies. Both have concerned Voldemort, and that seems to be her area of specialty, so to speak. Throughout the books, Jo often uses three as a nice, round number, especially for magical events; for example, three Triwizard challenges, three times the Potters defied Voldemort, et cetera. Do you think it’s possible that Trelawney will give a third and final prophecy converting – concerning Voldemort and/or Harry? Just wanted to know what you guys thought. Bye!

Ben: I don’t think there’s going to be any more prophecies.

Jamie: Hmmm! Hmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm!

Ben: Oh I’m sorry, Jamie, but I don’t think there are going to be any more prophecies.

Jamie: Oh, Ben, you’re so negative!

Ben: I just don’t think there will be!

Kevin: Do you think there will be? Do you think we’ll actually see her in the seventh book a lot?

Jamie: Kill her hopes! Kill her hopes! Kill her hopes! Kill her dreams!

Ben: I don’t think there’s a need for another prophecy.

Jamie: Apart from Prophecy 2007.

Kevin: Wait, when Harry was talking to Dumbledore, he – Dumbledore said he’s known her to give how many prophecies correctly? Was it two?

Jamie: You call yourself a fan, Kevin? Well done.

Ben: Yeah. [Laughs] Jamie’s in a bad mood; don’t mind him, Kevin.

Jamie: What’s the name of that guy who – uh, who’s in the books again? [laughs] What’s his name? Was it Harry?

[Ben laughs]

Jamie: I think? Henry, that’s it!

Ben: Henry.

Kevin: Anyway, so doesn’t that – including Harry’s prophecy that she told Harry – doesn’t that make three?

Jamie: No. No, it’s one where she predicted that Peter Pettigrew would rise up again and join Voldemort and the original prophecy that she…

Kevin: Oh, okay.

Jamie: …that she did in front of Dumbledore.

Micah: You can’t just bring a prophecy out of nowhere at the beginning of the book, and expect it to be fulfilled by the end, and…

Kevin: Yeah, that’s true. That’s enough foreshadowing.

Micah: …I think we already have one prophecy left that needs to be fulfilled, so I don’t think there’s going to be another one.

Ben: Yeah, there’s too much going on for another prophecy.

Jamie: And also Book Seven is all about choice. You know, it’s stressed throughout the entire series, and now it’s going to be all about what Harry wants to do, what Voldemort wants to do, you know? They can’t just find one more and it changes everything, I think. I don’t know. It’s an interesting theory, though.


Harry’s Boggart


[Audio]: Hi, this is Andrew Evans from Miami, Florida. I was wondering: in the third book Harry’s Boggart was a Dementor, but since he can repel them now without trouble, I don’t think he would fear them anymore. So if he saw a Boggart now, what do you think he would see? Thanks. Bye.

Ben: I think he would see the death of his friends, you know?

Jamie: Yeah.

Kevin: Or Voldemort?

Jamie: Can you actually see those things?

Ben: With a Boggart he fears Voldemort dying? No, Voldemort’s not his worst fear.

Jamie: Exactly. He wouldn’t actually fear Voldemort, he’d fear what Voldemort, you know, could bring. It’s like…

Kevin: Could do, yeah, that’s true.

Jamie: Haven’t you always wondered? Do you honestly think…?

Kevin: Like the Mirror of Erised discussion.

Jamie: Yeah, but you know? Do you… It’s like I’ve always thought it was weird with Ron, the thing he fears absolutely the most is spiders. There has to be something he fears more, like, you know, emotional things, like being alone, or growing old and not having anyone to, you know?

Kevin: Ehhh… If you – if you have, like, a phobia, it’s some of the real most intense fear you can have.

Jamie: Oh okay, then.

Ben: I just think Ron seems a bit superficial, and that’s why his fear isn’t as deep.

Jamie: Well, there are other people as well. Who else? I mean, the moon is understandable for Lupin, but…

Micah: Yeah, but it’s possible it changes, though.

Kevin: There are people who are afraid of going on elevators. I mean, that’s their biggest fear; they can’t stand them. It’s just the physical and mental reaction they get to the situation.

Jamie: I guess so. I guess so. I just doubt that Harry’s would be Voldemort’s strength, you know?

Kevin: Yeah, that’s true. Yeah. I agree.

Jamie: But when Lupin says, after Harry says that he fears, you know, Dementors the most, he says that shows the thing you fear most is fear itself. Perhaps, you know, when he sees Dementors, he doesn’t actually – he doesn’t actually fear the thing attacking him, but he fears what they bring, so the memories that he has to relive.

Ben: So, maybe it still would be a Dementor.

Jamie: Yeah, I think it still would be. I don’t think he actually fears the thing, he fears what they can do. And…

Ben: Right, I just think… I think that it makes sense that the reason in Prisoner of Azkaban that Harry saw the Dementor wasn’t necessarily because he was freaked out by it when he saw it on the train.

Jamie: Yeah.

Ben: That may have had something to do with it, but it also has a deeper representation of him only fearing…

Jamie: Exactly.

Ben: Fear. Right.

Jamie: Concur.


Show Close


Andrew [Show Close with music in background]: That does do it for Episode 57 of MuggleCast. We are off to LA, but the week after that we will be back with Episode 58. Once again, I am Andrew Sims.

Ben: I am Ben Schoen.

Jamie: I’m Jamie Lawrence.

Kevin: I’m Kevin Steck.

Micah: And I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Andrew: We will see you in two weeks.

Told you it was bad.