Transcript #147

MuggleCast 147 Transcript

Show Intro

[Intro music begins]

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Laura: Wow. Do any restrictions apply?

Mason: Some restrictions apply. See site for details. Get your piece of the Internet at GoDaddy…

Laura: …dot com.

[Harry Potter theme plays]

Jim Dale: [as Professor McGonagall] This is Professor McGonagall welcoming you all to MuggleCast hoping you all enjoyed – Dobby! Dobby, come here! Here! Dobby! [as Dobby] Yes, I’d just like to say how very pleased I am to introduce MuggleCast to all of you! Thank you! Thank you!

[Show music begins]

Micah: Because Voldemort chose midnight by looking at his watch, this…

Ralph Fiennes as Voldemort: You have proved yourself useful these past few months.

Micah: What did you just say?

Ralph Fiennes as Voldemort: I confess myself disappointed.

Micah: Yeah. I bet you do. This is MuggleCast Episode 147, for June 1st, 2008.

[Show music continues]

Andrew: All right, after taking a week off, we are back! Woohoo!

Matt: And…

Laura: Woah.

Andrew: We’re going to start the show with an e-mail. It comes from Mike, 28, of Federal Way, Washington. He writes:

“Hi MuggleCast, I love your podcast and think you guys do a great job every week. I have an idea for an old segment that you can update for today’s modern MuggleCaster: Spy on Schoen. We want to know what Ben Schoen is up to and why he is not on the show. Just like in the old days when you would bug Spartz, I think you should bug Ben. Maybe he can give us a Butterbeer. Again, you guys are awesome. Laura is my favorite, but Matt is becoming a close second.” What?

Matt: What now, Laura? I’m coming up next to you.

Laura: Hey now!

[Andrew and Micah laugh]

Andrew: Matt just did a little dance too, while he said that. It was kind of creepy.

Micah: Well, I agree.

Laura: Wait, what’s this person’s name?

Micah: Mike?

Laura: Mike? Mike, I’m very disappointed in you, Mike.

Micah: Ooh. Why?

Laura: How can you even compare Matt – I mean – just…

Matt: You should – you can’t compare Matt, but you can compare Matt with someone else.

Andrew: So it’s a good thing that Ben is joining us again this week. Hey, Ben.

Ben: Hey, guys.

Laura: Oh wow.

Matt: Oh! There he is.

Ben: After a – yet another long hiatus – I know I keep doing this – I say that I’m on and then I never am on, I’m sorry. Broken promises, broken hearts. Blame me.

Andrew: Broken dreams.

Ben: But, yeah, it’s good to be back. It’s good to talk to you guys again. You know, see what’s up with this Harry Potter business.

Matt: A lot – a lot has gone on. No, a lot has gone on.

Andrew: Harry Potter is far from over. But any way, we got a great show today, so we’ll get right to it. I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Micah: I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Matt: And I’m Matthew B.

[Show music continues]

Andrew: We took a week off, and we’re back, and of course we have a lot of news to discuss. And Micah? You want to update us with what’s been going on in the news?

Micah: Sure…

[Everyone laughs]

Micah: Well, Ben, are you aware that we’ve completely changed the news? And I feel like you have to at least do an old version of how you used to make fun of me.

Ben: What? Oh yeah, you mean, [imitating Micah] “Thanks Andrew.”

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Was that it?

Micah: Yeah, that was it. Good job.

Ben: So – so is the biggest news item that Andrew moved to Southern California? ‘Cause that’s what I feel like is big news.

Andrew: Well, thanks, Ben, that’s really sweet of you.

Matt: That’s all he ever talks about, that’s why.

Micah: Well, he’s there now so he can stop talking about it, right?

Andrew, Ben and

Matt: Yeah.

Ben: Finally. [laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, it was very exciting, very exciting though. Micah…

Ben: So how’d the news change? How is it different now?

Andrew: Well, now Micah will just talk about – well, instead of just reading all the news at once, he will introduce each item and then we’ll discuss it.

Ben: Oh, I see.

Andrew: Yes.

Ben: So there’s no longer – so what happened to the old MuggleCast news studio? The one in New York?

Andrew: It’s still there, he’s just – he’s just – doesn’t record all at once from it.

Ben: Oh okay, just checking. [laughs]

Andrew: Well, anyways. Unfortunately, we have to start with some sad news, Micah?

Harry Potter Actor Killed

Micah: Yeah, very sad news. Last, I believe it was, Saturday, here the in the U.S., we got news that Rob Knox, who was set to play – or actually I believe – did record the part of Marcus Belby in Half-Blood Prince was fatally stabbed in a street fight in London. And this got a lot of press, both obviously in the U.K. and then here in the U.S. as well. And I see that you made the point here, Andrew, that a lot of the story headlines were misleading.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Yes, they were.

Micah: And I’m guessing that you’re saying that because it made it to seem as if the – I don’t know, what was the point of…

Andrew: Well, the headlines were “Young Potter Actor Stabbed to Death.”

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: And when you read that, it’s like, “Young Potter Actor,” young Harry Potter actor… [laughs] …Dan Radcliffe! It’s just – it’s, you know, very misleading.

Matt: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah, I mean obviously the role that he played doesn’t lessen the impact of this terrible incident, but you are definitely right. I remember when Micah actually linked the article to me and the top menu bar loaded before the rest of the page, I thought that something had happened to one of the main three.

Andrew: Yeah.

Matt: Yeah.

Laura: So it definitely was really tricky the way they publicized it.

Matt: Well, they did that on purpose, Laura.

Laura: Yeah.

Micah: Yeah.

Laura: I think they did too.

Ben: They did a good job of it.

Andrew: So, I mean, it still doesn’t take away from the fact this is very sad news obviously, and our thoughts are with his family.

Micah: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah, it’s terrible.

News: Sorcerer’s Stone Being Re-released

Andrew: But, in happier news, Sorcerer’s Stone is be rereleased.

Ben: Oh, wow.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: Oh wow, that was a great transition.

[Everyone laughs]

Micah: Is this an attempt to cash in? I mean, you rereleasing Sorcerer’s Stone, I understand it’s the tenth anniversary, but I mean, really? Do we really need another version of Sorcerer’s Stone? Is this just going to keep happening with all the other books? You know, okay, well, it’s ten years since Chamber of Secrets was released, ten years since Prisoner of Azkaban was released. I mean, do we really need to do this? Are we that far removed from Book 7 already that we have to start creating special versions of all these books?

Andrew: Well, I think there’s a good reason to recreate Sorcerer’s Stone, ’cause it was the first one, but yeah, that’s a good point. I don’t know if they would actually recreate all seven, ’cause that would like – is Mary Grandpre going to recreate all seven covers? That’d be cool, but…

Ben: I mean, I don’t see why not. Why not – why wouldn’t they milk it for all its worth?

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah, I think they will. Though, I have to say, I wasn’t overly impressed with the new cover art.

Matt: I wasn’t either, Laura.

Andrew: You didn’t? Oh, I love the – I loved the Sorcerer’s Stone cover art, this new one. Harry’s so cute! I’m sorry, but I have to say it. [laughs]

Ben: Oh man, oh my.

Matt: But it’s just not exactly a new scene that Mary Grandpre has drawn.

Andrew: Oh.

Matt: She’s drawn the same exact scene before.

Andrew: Matt actually pointed out – he linked me to it, and we’ll link everyone to it in the show notes but – yeah, Mary Grandpre already created – drew this scene, it’s just from a different angle. And like, Harry’s in the same exact pose and everything. It’s interesting.

Matt: Yeah, and he’s wearing different clothes too. It’s the same scene.

Andrew: The only difference is he’s wearing clothes, right?

Matt: Yeah.

Andrew: And a different angle. But…

Laura: Yeah.

Matt: I kind of wish that she…

Andrew: I thought that was worth noting.

Matt: …drew like a different kind of scene that she hasn’t done before.

Andrew: Yeah.

Matt: Maybe something new for the fans to kind of see a scene that they’ve never saw drawn before or something.

Laura: Well, the price on these books is very steep too. Didn’t I see that it was going to be something like $30?

Micah: Yeah.

Andrew: I don’t – thirty. Well, let’s see. What does it come with? It has a – does it have a special introduction by J.K. Rowling or something, I believe?

Micah: It’s going to be released on the 23rd, costs $30, and…

Andrew: September 23.

Micah: Yeah, September 23, sorry. I think you’re right, Andrew. I think there was something – exclusive bonus material from J.K. Rowling, so…

Andrew: There it is, yeah. I think this is exciting. I’m a really big fan of the cover. I think Harry looks really cute… [laughs] …I have to be honest. I don’t know. I’m looking forward to it. Is everyone going to buy it? $30?

Laura: No.

Andrew: No? Aww.

Matt: Aww.

Laura: I know, I’m such a decenter. I just can’t help it.

Matt: Well, I would probably buy it if they had like the whole series redrawn or something, but just for the one book that I already have like three copies of already?

Andrew: Yeah. Ben, will you buy it?

Ben: Probably – I mean – I really like – would like to know what the bonus material is that you’re talking about. I’m sure it’s something cool, but I don’t know if its worth $30. I mean…

Laura: Well, now I have a question. Do any of the profits…

Ben: I’m just saying, it’s the same book.

Laura: Do any of the profits go towards a charity, or anything?

Andrew: I don’t think that’s been said actually. I don’t think so.

Laura: Because then I would be inclined to buy it if I thought that there was a certain amount of the profits going to a good cause.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: But…

Andrew: Yeah.

Micah: It doesn’t say anything about that in the news release, but you never know. Somewhere down the line it might, but to me this seems more like a move by Scholastic than it is by J.K. Rowling. And usually when it’s by…

Andrew: Oh yeah.

Matt: Mhm.

Micah: …J.K. Rowling it’s for charity as opposed to the book company whose probably just looking to make some money off of it. You’re right, 30 bucks is a lot of money to pay for this, but I don’t think I’d be inclined to buy…

Andrew: Yeah. On the other – you do need to keep in mind though that J.K. Rowling is adding something to this book, so she can’t be completely against it. You know?

Micah: Well, but it’s also – it’s a hard cover edition, right? So, maybe 30 bucks isn’t that much.

Andrew: Yeah.

Matt: Right. And basically, I think it’s just sort of like a, you know, a little refresh from an old friend or something. Like from the first series of the books.

Andrew: What else is in the news, Micah?

News: Rowling’s Prequel

Micah: Well, speaking of J.K. Rowling, we learned that she is going to be, or has already written, a little bit of a prequel to the Harry Potter series that’s going to be auctioned off by WaterStones, and everybody got all excited because it’s – everyone thought – or at least when you told me about it, Andrew, I thought that she actually wrote another story, but in fact, it’s just an 800-word outline of something having to do with the Marauders. And I don’t know. Again, is this really that exciting? I mean are people jumping up and down about this?

Andrew: Yeah, I don’t know.

Ben: I mean at this point, I feel like – I feel like we’re just kind of searching for stuff to talk about in terms of news. It’s like searching for new news, you know?

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: I think Harry Potter fans get excited about trailers, get excited about everything. So, I’m sure a lot of people visiting the site, a lot of people listening to this definitely find this exciting.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Yeah, I’m personally excited about this.

Laura: Yeah, me too.

Andrew: It’s a new Harry Potter story. What’s 800 words? That’s like two pages. Right?

Micah: Well, they said it’s the front and back of a…

Andrew: Yeah…

Micah: Of a card, right? I mean…

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: It’s like A4 sized card. I think it’s a pretty standard paper. 800 words is a good amount if you’re typing that up. I mean we’ve all been there with the 800 word report, or the 1,000 word reports. Sometimes it can be a bit a stretch.

Matt: I think it’s definitely going to be worth a read anyway, since…

Andrew: Well, yeah, of course.

Matt: …J.K. Rowling has given the time to actually written a story…

Andrew: Yeah…

Matt: …from her series.

Ben: I mean, I think it’s a good move. I think it’s something that’s going to be interesting, but I really don’t how excited I’m going to be about it.

Andrew: Yeah. Well, it is a story of the Marauders, James and Sirius, I believe. So…

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Set three years before Harry’s birth. Right, Laura?

Laura: Yeah, that’s right.

Matt: Yeah, well, that would be kind of interesting to see. It’s probably something they were in school with together just too see a little more of James and Sirius’s relationship when they were younger.

Andrew: Mhm.

Micah: It’s all for charity, too. So…

Andrew: It’s all for – yeah, there you go. And J.K. Rowling said herself that she knew that writing something related to Harry Potter would sell the best, so, smart move by her.

Matt: Good girl.

Micah: Yeah, and they’re available…

Andrew: And she said…

Micah: …aren’t they?

Andrew: Yeah, you’re going to be able to buy them online. You can pre-order them now and it comes with Jo’s story and the stories of the twelve other authors all participating in the story card charity, sponsored by Waterstones.

Micah: So, will the money go to charity from the book purchases, as well? Or just from the auction of the actual…

Andrew: No, from the book purchase too.

Micah: Oh okay. So…

Andrew: Yeah. It’s going to the English Pen at Dyslexia Action charities. So, there you go.

Ben: Good for them.

Andrew: Ooh, yeah, good for them is right. How exciting must that have been? That’s going to sell like crazy. What else is going on?


Micah: You put this thing up here about SuperCon down in Florida this past week.

Andrew: SuperCon!

Micah: [laughs] So, a few of the Harry Potter actors were in attendance including Natalia Tena and Devon Murray, as well as a few others, and the big news out of SuperCon was that none of them have read Deathly Hallows.

[Andrew gasps]

Matt: Really? Wow.

Laura: Eh, is anyone really that shocked?

Andrew: Micah, I got to disagree with you. I don’t even think that’s the biggest news. The biggest news is that Hugh Mitchell has long wavy hair.

Micah: Oh.

Andrew: …and looks like a rock star now.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: He used to be innocent Colin Creevey and now…

Micah: I honestly – I didn’t read that story, I just kind of took it off of what you put here so I apologize.

Andrew: Well if – it’s Okay. If you look at the picture you’ll see Hugh Mitchell – he’s changed so much, it’s kind of crazy! [laughs]

Matt: He’s towering over everyone too.

Andrew: He’s really tall, yeah, you know. A few years does a lot to you.

Ben: Dan read the last book. I think it’s not the end of the world I think.

Andrew: No.

Ben: There do exist people who haven’t read Harry Potter.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: They missed out, obviously, they don’t know what they’re missing, but…

Andrew: Yeah. A lot of people in the comments have been saying, “Well, you know, you would expect them to have read the books that they’re going to be in.” I guess mostly Natalie Tena and Devon Murray. Hugh Mitchell is done with Potter it seems, although he does appear in the seventh book, so…

Matt: Yeah, well, he dies.

Andrew: Yeah, so, I don’t know! What else is going on, Micah?

Micah: It was pretty busy. I mean it’s only been busy because we’ve been…

Andrew and Micah: …gone for two weeks…

Micah: …here.

Andrew: Yeah.

News: John Hurt Returns to the Movies?

Micah: John Hurt, who played Ollivander in the first Harry Potter movie, he spoke with The Sun earlier this week and he said that, although nothing was going on for Half-Blood Prince that he might be spending some more time around the Harry Potter set for the next one.

Matt: Mhm!

Andrew: What a tease.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: But, yeah, that’s exciting, and Matt mentioned this a few weeks ago, I think we were talking about it on the show a few weeks ago that, wonder if John Hurt’s going to be back, and here’s a little thing from him.

Micah: Yeah, I thought that was really weird. You were – Matt was talking about it and then we got this article so I don’t know…

Andrew: Well, he listens to the podcast. I didn’t bring that up when we were talking about that?

Micah: Oh really?

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Oh! That explains a lot. Cool.

Andrew: No, yeah he has a MuggleCast t-shirt. He told me he’s wearing it for National MuggleCast T-Shirt Day, so..

Laura: Sweet.

Matt: Coming up on June 2.

Micah: Okay. Well…

[Everyone laughs]

Micah: That’s good, hopefully he takes a picture and sends it in.

Andrew: Yeah. [laughs]

Matt: Well, I’m really excited that he actually announced that he will be back, which just, you know, confirms that they’re going to have that big scene between Harry and Ollivander in Half-Blood

Laura: Oh yeah, that’s right.

Matt: Or in Deathly Hallows.

News: More Pictures

Micah: And then finally, you know I always love talking about this. This is my favorite news discussion topic.

[Andrew laughs]

Micah: Pictures!

[Andrew and Matt laugh]

Andrew: Yay!

[Laura laughs]

Micah: From Half Blood Prince. Does anybody care? I mean…

Andrew: Yeah, why not? Why wouldn’t you care?

Micah: I don’t care! I want to see a trailer. I don’t give a…

Ben: Oh come on, pictures used to be very exciting things. Back in the day. They’re just not what they used to be.

Micah: Yeah, back in the 1950s maybe.

[Andrew and Matt laugh]

Ben: Oh, good one! They were exciting – they were exciting…a year ago.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: The last film!

Laura: Well, the problem…

Ben: I still think they’re exciting. Pictures can be definitely be exciting.

Matt: Micah, I think you would be excited for this picture if they already had the teaser out. I think you’re just bitter because that they haven’t released it yet.

Ben: They’re keeping you in suspense.

Micah: I don’t think we’re getting it.

Matt: Oh, no. We’ll get it about a week before the movie’s released or something like that.

Andrew: Yeah, a teaser right before it comes out.

Matt: Yeah.

Andrew: No. Well, okay. Here’s my thing with these leaked pictures. I’ve talked about this before. I won’t spend more time on it again this week. But they’ve been coming out every Friday. For the past three weeks, there’s been a new leaked – small, leaked Half-Blood Prince photo and it’s just like, okay, stop, you know…

Laura: We’re not stupid.

Andrew: It’s kind of stupid.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Who else would be behind…? Okay, maybe there’s someone inside WB, you know, leaking these, and WB doesn’t know about it. But then wouldn’t WB ask us to take these pictures down? It just doesn’t make sense. But this new one that just came up on Friday is a nice picture of Snape, Draco and Filch all sitting, or all standing, in Slughorn’s party. And I think it’s a nice picture.

Matt: Mhm.

Laura: Yeah.

Micah: It’s a great picture.

Andrew: I’m going to tag him on Facebook. I like it. Sorry, Micah

Matt: It’s kind of boring, though. How come we’re getting all these pictures of where there’s really nothing really going on? There’s no action, they’re all just standing there.

Andrew: Those are locked away in a vault, where someone can’t actually leak the pictures.

Laura: Maybe that’s why we don’t have a trailer yet. Maybe something’s gone terribly wrong with all the action scenes. The CGI..

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: The special effects. Oh my God, Laura! That’s a great theory! The Special Effects department is like on strike or something.

Laura: Yeah. [laughs] That would be terrible.

Announcement: Podcast Alley

Andrew: [laughs] Okay. Well, that does it for news this week. Moving on to announcements, Matt was just checking Podcast Alley. And we’re number one this week, right?

Matt: We are still number one.

Matt: Wait, just let me check.

Laura: Woo!

Matt: I checked last night, but I didn’t check today.

Andrew: So thank you for voting for us and, you know, it is MuggleCast May. Well, actually it’s MuggleCast Mune. So make sure to get your vote in. Ben, what we’ve been doing is we encourage the listeners. We have to be number one on Podcast Alley each month that starts with M. So, you know, MuggleCast March, MuggleCast Mapril, MuggleCast Mune now.

Matt: No, it’s like M-June. M-June.

Andrew: M-June. So, thank you, everyone, for voting for us.

Micah: Yeah. This is also the time that the other podcasts like to get voters to go out and vote right before the month ends, so it looks like they were up top for the entire month. Did you notice they did that to us last month?

Andrew and Laura: Yeah.

Matt: But they won us by like five votes the last hour.

Announcement: June 2 is MuggleCast T-shirt Day

Andrew: Not cool. And also, MuggleCast T-shirt Day is June 2. That is Monday. So, make sure you wear your MuggleCast t-shirt. If you don’t have one, if you didn’t buy one when we were selling them, unfortunately we can’t sell them any more. But if you do have one, make sure you wear it. If you weren’t able to buy one, create your own. Take a picture of yourself wearing it, somewhere out in public, and send it on in to andrew at staff dot mugglenet dot com, and put “T-Shirt Day” in the subject, and then, in the subject line, and we’ll create a little gallery so everyone can see everyone showing their MuggleCast pride!

Micah: And we have to do that, right?

Matt: Well, you’ve got like five…

Andrew: Well, I hope you do.

Laura: We have to take the pictures?

Andrew: Of ourselves? Well, you know, have someone take a picture of you.

Laura: Well…

Matt: Unless you’re a loser and don’t have friends.

Laura: Well, yeah, but – but we already have pictures of ourselves in our shirts.

Andrew: [laughs] Okay, well…

Laura: Can’t we just be lazy and pull them off Facebook?

Andrew: Sure, Laura, yeah…

Matt: No! No, no, no.

[Laura and Micah laugh]

Andrew: Take a new picture. Make Matt happy.

Ben: All I wear is MuggleCast t-shirts, so…

Andrew: Me too. All you wear is MuggleNet t-shirts, Ben.

Ben: I’ve been wearing the “No City Is Safe” t-shirt every day.

Andrew: Really.

Ben: Seriously. I lived at Emerson’s house, you know? And…

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: …in the basement at Emerson’s there would be just, like, boxes filled with those t-shirts we left there over the summer. And so whenever I ran out of laundry I would just go down there and I’d grab a huge stack of t-shirts…

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: …and take it up to my room and I would just have a big pile of MuggleCast t-shirts in the corner.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: They’re so comfortable, though. I wish we could sell them because they’re so comfortable.

Matt: It’s very fashionable.

Ben: They’re definitely worth buying.

Andrew: Word has it that if you attend Portus, you’ll be treated to a new MuggleCast Portus t-shirt. Mhm….

Ben: MuggleCast what t-shirt?

Andrew: MuggleCast live at Portus.

Ben: Ooh!

Andrew: Yeah!

Ben: That’s nice!

Andrew: In the works now! Anyway, let’s move on to Muggle Mail this week.

Ben: No city is safe!

Andrew: No city is safe, correct. Well, this one may have it better. I was thinking for the Portus shirts it could say, “theories,” or, “every theory is bigger in Texas”, or “each theory is bigger in Texas,” something like that.

Laura: Oh yeah.

Matt: Mhm.

Andrew: I don’t know. We’ll talk about it later. Anyway, let’s move on to Muggle Mail this week. Laura, you want to take the first one?

MuggleCast 147 Transcript (continued)

Muggle Mail: Correction of a Correction

Laura: Sure! Our first Muggle Mail comes from Helen, 25, of Hinsdale, Illinois. She says:

“Hey, MuggleCasters! I love the show. I have a correction of a correction! Someone e-mailed in last week, I think her name was Danielle, about Trelawny and Malfoy in the Room of Requirement. She said that the reason everything went dark when Trelawny entered the room was because Malfoy didn’t want her there, and so the room threw her out. In fact, Malfoy used the Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder that he bought from the Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes to blind Trelawny and throw her out himself. He could still see because he had his Hand of Glory, which gives light only to the holder. He used the same tactic when the DA were stalking out of the room on Harry’s orders a little while later. Malfoy used the last of his Darkness Powder to blind them and lead the Death Eaters through and into the school.”

Andrew: So there you go. So when we had a rebuttal last week, or two weeks ago, that actually created a little more controversy…

Matt: Yeah.

Andrew: …and…

Ben: You know, it takes some real, real skill to catch a correction of a correction, you know?

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: It takes some real skill.

Andrew: It takes some real stupidity on our end to put in an e-mail that was incorrect. I’ll just blame it on me.

Laura: Yeah. Yeah who did that? Who did that? They should be fired!

Andrew: It was probably me.

Ben: Producer! Andrew the producer!

Andrew: [laughs] But one of us read it, it wasn’t…

Ben: Give him a break, he’s done like 150 of these, okay?

Andrew: Yeah!

Ben: Poor guy.

Andrew: Look at Ben, sticking up for me for once.

Muggle Mail: House Passwords

Micah: The next one comes from Molly S, 17, of Schenectady, New York. We have a lot of fans…

Ben: Wait, wait, wait, say that again.

Micah: Schenectady?

Ben: Okay, cool.

Micah: We have a lot…

[Laura laughs]

Micah: …of fans there don’t we?

Andrew: We do, apparently. Area code, or zip code 12345, right?

Micah: Correct. Yeah.

Andrew: That’s so cool. Anyway…

Micah: “In response to Chapter-by-Chapter in Episode 146 where you were talking about passwords to the various common rooms, the common rooms are not only password protected, but only the members of that House know the exact location. In “Chamber of Secrets” when Harry and Ron were looking to get into the Slytherin common room to interrogate Malfoy, they did not really know where the entrance was. Also, in ‘Deathly Hallows’ in Chapter 22, maybe 23, Fenrir Greyback asks the trio where the Slytherin common room is. He also says that most people they ask don’t know where it is located. The only reason that Harry has a much better idea of where all the common rooms are is that he can see where students of various Houses disappear on the Marauder’s Map. Another important thing is that all the guards of
the Houses, i.e. Fat Lady, can see who they’re letting in. They may not say
anything to random people that are not looking to enter the common room. Love the show, especially Chapter-by-Chapter, Molly.”

Matt: Aw, thanks, Molly.

Micah: So that was kind of a correction of a correction too, wasn’t it?

Andrew and Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: But it’s an addition to what we were talking about. I don’t – the locations – I mean – I have a hard time believing that so many like – I would think that the majority of students would know the locations of each of the Houses are. I mean you would over hear it at some point in your seven years of being there…

Ben: That’s like…

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: …going to college and not knowing where all the dorms is, I think.

Laura: Yeah…

Andrew: Right, right.

Laura: …exactly. And also, Harry knew so much about the Slytherin common room because he’d been there…

Matt: Mm, right.

Ben: He was a rebel.

Andrew: Yeah. Well, it’s interesting. I think the whole House thing is pretty interesting, in terms of security and all that, but next e-mail, Ben? Final one for today.

Muggle Mail: Recording Within a Cinema

Ben: Lizzy, age 15, from England has e-mailed us regarding recording in cinemas, and she writes:

“I was just listening to MuggleCast 146. I was completely horrified
to hear a listener challenge that would involve breaking the law as recording within cinemas is illegal…”

[Ben and Laura laugh]

Ben: “One of you mentioned this, but this was waved off. Please don’t do this again. It is a bad influence from a wonderful podcast. Lizzy.”

Matt: Aww.

Ben: You know what? Lizzy, I’d like to thank you. That’s actually why I came on this week, was because…

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: …I realize that Andrew is using the podcast for bad influence and…

[Andrew and Laura laughs]

Ben: …I decided I had to put a stop to it, so that’s why I’m back, and I’ll make sure that Andrew’s kept in line.

Andrew: Do you need to give me a butterbeer?

Ben: All out of butterbeer.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: All out of butterbeer.

Andrew: So, okay, about this, just real quick. We did this with Order of the Phoenix, and we didn’t get many complaints. We got a few complaints this time, and I just want to say that – do it if you want to. If you’re unsure, if you think you’ll get caught, we’re not responsible for anyone getting caught. We did it with Order of the Phoenix. There were no
issues or anything that went wrong. Not to say that it couldn’t go wrong with Half-Blood Prince

Ben: But, Andrew…

Andrew: It’s just a fun little thing.

Ben: But, Andrew. Andrew.

Andrew: You would get in trouble – hold on. You would get in trouble for recording the movie. Don’t record the movie you’re seeing the trailer with. It just – at the end of the trailer, record a quick five second thing.

Matt: You don’t even have to record the whole trailer.

Andrew: Yeah, and if you’re unsure, don’t do it. Please don’t do it.

Ben: The bottom line is it’s breaking the law.

Andrew: Mhm.

Ben: So…

Andrew: Thanks, Ben.

Ben: Like, I just really wouldn’t encourage it. I mean, unless you’re a real rebel. Unless you want to show that you really like MuggleCast. If you really like MuggleCast, you’d do it.

[Laura laughs]

Ben: But…

Andrew: Oh…

Ben: I’m just kidding.

Andrew: Geez.

Ben: I’m just kidding.

Andrew: Oh, geez.

[Matt laughs]

Ben: I’m sorry. I’m not funny.

Andrew: All right.

Ben: I quit.

Chapter-by-Chapter: Chapter 31, “The Battle of Hogwarts”

Andrew: Oh, don’t. Ben. All right, well, it’s time to move on to Chapter-by-Chapter this week. We’re going to be discussing Chapter 31, “The Battle of Hogwarts.” What an exciting chapter.

Laura: Yeah.

Ben: Which book is this? [laughs]

Andrew: It’s a long one.

[Laura and Matt laugh]

Laura: Well, the chapter opens as the entire school is being gathered in the Great Hall, and throughout the chapter, Harry is basically running around trying to figure out where the diadem of Rowena Ravenclaw is. During this chapter, Ron and Hermione have also gone missing and he really can’t decide where they’ve gone to, and in the meanwhile, the battle has begun and they only have until midnight to either decide on a battle plan or hand Harry over to Voldemort.

Ben: Oooh.

The Great Hall Scene

Laura: Ooooooh. [laughs] So, as was previously stated the entire school has been gathered into the Great Hall and Professor McGonagall essentially tells everybody that all underage students have to be evacuated, but if you are of age, you can stay and fight. And I thought this scene was kind of funny because it talked about how the entire Slytherin table left and that there were remnants of students left among the other three Houses, but she had to come and shoo away like half of the
underage students from Gryffindor because they wouldn’t leave…

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: …and I just thought that was really great, and I’m – I wonder how they’re going to handle that in the movie because, you know, sometimes they haven’t paid that much attention to the age restrictions in the films.

Andrew: Yeah, yeah.

Matt: Mhm.

Laura: So I wonder how many people will actually stay.

Andrew: This is also very telling of a Gryffindor too, and I mean I guess that’s the point that you were getting at.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: Just that so many Gryffindors would stay behind even though they were underage.

Matt: One of the Slytherin students asked Professor McGonagall where Snape
is, and Professor McGonagall replies that Snape has, for a common phrase, “done a bunk.”

Andrew: I didn’t even know what this meant.

Matt: Yeah, I didn’t know what this was either…

Laura: Yeah.

Matt: …so that’s why I looked it up, and it’s English slang for “leaving without permission.”

Laura: Oh, that’s good for looking that up.

Matt: Mhm. Well, see, I have the U.K. version though. Is that in the U.S. version too?

Micah: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah, it is.

Andrew: How does that even relate though? Like you – like a bunker? You’re like hiding in a bunker?

Ben: No, no, no. They just have weird phrases for things, I don’t know.

Andrew: Yeah, they are pretty weird over there. Sorry, Vince.

Laura: Yeah, ’cause we don’t have any weird phrases over here.

Tangent: Ben Doesn’t Like Andrew Saying “Cash”

Andrew: No, we – no, we don’t. Like “bucks.” Matt – Ben always used to be upset when I’d say “bucks” instead of like “dollars.”

Laura: Oh, really?

Andrew: Right, Ben?

Ben: No, that wasn’t why. No, that’s not even what it was at all. You said cash.

Andrew: What was it?

Ben: You said cash.

Matt: Who says cash?

Andrew: I say cash. People on the east coast. Civilized people say cash.

Ben: No, it wasn’t like that at all. You guys wouldn’t understand. You have to be around him to hear him say it.

Andrew: All right.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, whatever. I still say it.

Ben: It would like slither up your back the way you said it. Like make you…

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Oh brother!

Ben: Make you shake, I swear.

Andrew: What was I like speaking Parsteltongue? I just…

[Matt hisses]

Voldemort’s Reward

Andrew: [unintelligible]…cash. Anyway, so next what happens is they hear Voldemort. As Hagrid says later on, you could hear his voice all the way up from the cave he was hiding in, and he says – he issues this ultimatum for Harry Potter by midnight. He said if they do give Harry Potter to Voldemort, they will be rewarded. And did this mean rewarded with their lives or was Voldemort going to give them all like a souvenir from the event like “I survived Voldemort’s attacks on Hogwarts” shirt?

Laura: Actually, he was going to bake them all cookies, I think…

Matt: Aww.

Andrew: Aww, that’s so cute.

Laura: …and give them all gold stars. No, I think he was – I mean obviously I think he was lying.

Matt: Yeah. Basically, I mean, most of the students are going to be stopping and fighting – are mostly Half-bloods or Mud-bloods who aren’t really going to get any mercy from Voldemort anyway, and…

Andrew: But does Voldemort really think that kids would for the, you know, teasing them with a reward? Like, “Oh my God, a reward!”

Matt: Well, he’s threatening them with their lives right now. I don’t think kids or adults, they don’t think very straight sometimes when their lives are being threatened that forcefully.

Laura: And I also think Voldemort’s trying to threaten them in a very utilitarian way, just in saying, “if you give me this one person, you will all live. But if you don’t give him to me, you will all die.”

Ben: Would we believe him anyways, though?

Laura: No, they shouldn’t, but I can see why he would try to use that tactic.

Ben: I mean like bottom line is if he wants to kill them all, he’s probably going to kill them all. They have…

Matt: Yeah.

Ben: If they give away Harry, that’s their only hope.

Laura: Mhm.

Matt: He does. I don’t even think he cares if they give him up or not because he knows he’s just going to go in there and kick the crap out of everyone who’s inside.

Ben: But he didn’t!

Midnight Symbolism

Andrew: Also, Voldemort says “by midnight” and it reminded me of the very Cinderella-ish, you know, what was the thing? If you wear the thing by midnight then you turn into a pumpkin or a…

Micah: It was a frog.

Andrew: Oh, that’s it.

Matt: I’m sure the wicked step mother wouldn’t try and…

Andrew: Ben, you would know Cinderella.

Matt: …kill Cinderella.

Ben: Well, I took time to work on a personal project. It’s the Cinderella Podcast.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: Didn’t get very far. Sorry.

Andrew: So are there any other connections with the by midnight thing? I just thought that was sort of very symbolic.

Micah: I just think Voldemort looked at his watch, and he said, “Oh well…”

[Everyone laughs]

Micah: “I’m just going to give him thirty minutes. That’s it.”

[Andrew laughs]

Andrew: Is thirty minutes good? Yeah, I think so.

Matt: Okay, you got till midnight.

Andrew: I got to catch Late Night with Conan.

Laura: It is a very common literary device. I mean, midnight.

Matt: Well, midnight’s the end of that day.

Laura: Yeah.

Matt: It’s pretty much just saying that by midnight is the next day.

Ben: Yeah, by the stroke of midnight.

Laura: Well, also…

Andrew: I just thought Voldemort was too cool to issue an ultimatum, “by midnight.”

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: I think he’s cooler than that.

Ben: What was…

Andrew: Sorry, Laura, what were you thinking?

Ben: What would be cooler than that, by 7:30?

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Andrew: No. “Get him out of here ASAP” or “get him out here in fifteen minutes.” Instead it’s “by midnight.”

Ben: Well, see, no – but, see, the about Voldemort is he’s always done that. Like with Harry’s mom, he gave her a chance. He likes to bargain a little bit.

Andrew: Yeah, true. True, Ben.

Length of Battle

Laura: Yeah, well you know what’s interesting about this, is this gives you a scope as to how long this battle actually lasts, because it doesn’t end ’till morning.

Andrew: It’s not long.

Laura: And it starts at midnight, so you’re looking at six or seven hours… [laughs] …of combat.

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Which is…wow.

Andrew: Yeah, that’s a lot.

Change of View of Harry

Laura: Well, in the next point we’re talking about, you kind of see where the loyalties of most of the Slytherin House lie. In the previous chapter McGonagall actually told Slughorn that the Slytherin students were going to have to decide which side of this war they were on, and in this scene Pansy Parkinson stands up and points to Harry and says, “well, look, everyone, Harry’s there. Why don’t we give him up to Voldemort and be done with it?” And all three – Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff and Gryffindor – Houses stand and face toward Pansy and pull their wands out.

Micah: Yeah.

Laura: And I just thought this was a really great contrast to the way the majority of the school was portrayed as being against Harry in Order of the Phoenix just because next to no one believed that Voldemort had come back.

Andrew: Right.

Matt: Mhm.

Andrew: It is kind of hard to not believe him now too.

Matt: Yeah.

Laura: Yeah, it’s just interesting, because he used to be scorned a lot.

Andrew: Right.

Laura: People would make fun of him and that kind of thing, and he has really gained a lot of respect from his peers, so…

Andrew: Yeah.

Matt: He really has.

Laura: I think it’s a really transforming moment.

Andrew: That’s another way you feel good with the Harry Potter series too. Whenever these big turn-around moments occur…

Laura: Mhm.

Andrew: …it’s really feel good. You know, when Umbridge…

Matt: Yeah, this was very one of those uplifting moments that you got right before the big fight, like how many people that you didn’t expect come to your aide.

Too Much Movie Talk

Micah: Yeah, and you are not going to like me saying this…

Andrew: Uh-oh.

Micah: …but I think it’s going to be a cool movie scene.

[Andrew laughs]

Matt: Oh, thank you. I was afraid to say that, because Andrew’s right next to me.

Andrew: Well, for everyone who doesn’t know, after we recorded last week, I was like, “Guys, I feel like there’s a lot of movie talk in Chapter-by-Chapter. Maybe we shouldn’t – maybe we shouldn’t do that.” And they all attacked me. Like, “Oh, well, gee!”

Laura: [laughs] Well – and you know what? I have to kind of counter that and say it could also be a really cheesy scene, too.

Micah: Yeah, you’re right.

Laura: If they shoot it wrong…

Micah: It could be.

Laura: …they could really mess it up. [laughs] So I hope they don’t.

Andrew: I could just see Pansy saying her lines to get Harry into her – into him, and then it cuts to a shot of everyone facing the camera, all pointing their wands at the camera, and they’re really pointing at Pansy. That would be cool.

Matt: Well, it’s possible they may even cut that part right there – that scene, too.

Micah: Yeah.

Matt: But – but haven’t they – they casted an actual Pansy again, haven’t they? For the sixth book?

Andrew: Yeah, they did.

Matt: Well, and since David Yates is doing the next two-parter movie also, he may have her in mind to be in that scene.

Micah: And what an appropriate name for…

Andrew: Pansy? Yeah.

Micah: …this part of the book.

Laura: Yeah, that’s true. Ha.

Matt: What a little pansy.

[Laura laughs]

Micah: I have another word, but this is a G-rated show.

Andrew: Yeah, so it is.

Laura: Is it?

[Andrew laughs]

Laura: Hasn’t always been in the past.

Micah: Well, not for you, Laura.

Laura: I’ll take your word for it.

Micah: All your curses come through loud and clear.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: Hey, now! That’s not my fault. Blame the editor.

Andrew: That’s my fault. I take full responsibility.

Ben: I think Andrew actually messes up other people’s and does his own perfectly just so everyone else looks worse than him.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Yes, I do. I tweak every sentence to make sure it sounds perfect. I’m so well-spoken once I’m finished editing.

Matt: You fans have no idea how horrible his grammar is.

Laura: How terrible this is to listen to when we’re actually recording. It’s just horrible.

Andrew: Yeah, really, it takes me ten sent – minutes to get a word out.

[Andrew and Matt make stuttering noises]

[Laura laughs]

Students Battling Scene

Andrew: Anyway, let’s stay on topic here. The professors organize a battle plan in which the students will be split between the towers and the grounds to defend Hogwarts. And then as the battle begins, Harry’s looking desperately for the Horcrux, and this is another great movie scene. I mean, you can really – this is another one you can really picture in your head because all the kids are running around him. And I really hope – it’s a shame Mikey isn’t here because Mikey could really, you know, agree with me on this – I really hope they use a very shaky camera while following Harry to show the sort of – the craziness that is ensuing.

Laura: Yeah. Yeah, I think that would be really good. I just have this visual of how they’re going to, like, do these scenes. I just imagine one of those great pans across, you know, the Hogwarts grounds as people are running out of the castle and going into the towers, and…

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: …I think it’ll just be – it’ll just look fantastic. I can’t wait.

Andrew: Yeah, it will. So then what happens next?

Micah: I mean, was this a little weird though? I mean, Harry’s just standing there and then all of a sudden Professor McGonagall comes up to him and says, “Hey, aren’t you supposed to be looking for something?”

Matt: Yeah.

Laura: Well, he’d forgotten about it because he couldn’t find Ron and Hermione. They just disappeared.

Matt: He did get sidetracked and, you know, McGonagall came up behind him and was like, “Dude! Whatsup? You’re supposed to be looking for something.”

Andrew: Well, it was good to see this because it shows where Harry’s priorities are.

Laura: Yeah.

Harry Finally Gets Rid of his Hero Complex

Andrew: He hasn’t, like, completely thrown worry about Ron and Hermione out the window. He puts them first it seems.

Laura: Well, and it also goes to show that he’s finally realized he doesn’t have to be in this alone. Because for so long he just touted on about how, “Oh, Ron and Hermione can’t come with me. I have to do this alone.”

Ben: Yeah, the Hero Syndrome.

Laura: But in the book he actually – yeah. He was actually – he said something along the lines of he couldn’t even focus on trying to find what he needed because he couldn’t do it without Ron and Hermione.

Andrew: Yeah.

Matt: Yeah, that’s true.

Laura: So it’s another one of those good defining moments.

Andrew: Uh-huh.

Laura: And actually after this he realizes, you know, that Voldemort knew that Harry would pick up on the association between the Horcrux and Ravenclaw. So that’s why he had Amicus and – what was the other one’s name?

Andrew: Lect…

Laura: Alecto.

Andrew: Yeah. Alecto, yes.

The Gray Lady

Laura: That was why he had Amicus and Alecto guarding the Ravenclaw common room. So he runs into Nearless Headless Nick and he he asks him to help him find the Ravenclaw ghost. And when he sees her he notices that she does this weird thing where she sees him looking at her and she tries to escape. She floats through a wall. And he finally gets to her and asks her about the diadem, and he find out that she’s actually the daughter of Rowena Ravenclaw, which was very interesting.

Matt: Yes.

Laura: Especially considering the story behind it. Well, we also find out about her relationship with the Bloody Barron, which actually explains why he is bloody. Because, essentially, what happens is Helena Ravenclaw, which is the name of the Gray Lady, stole her mother’s diadem and went to Albania with it and hid it in the trunk of a tree. And when she was hiding there Rowena was on her death bed, and she sent the Bloody Barron, who had actually been in love with Helena, to come and find her. But when she refused to go with him, he stabbed her and killed her. And when he’d realized what he’d done he then killed himself.

Matt: How do you – I mean, how do you – how does that situation play out?

Laura: It’s an act of passion.

Matt: “Your mom wants you.” “No.” “Well, I’m going to kill you then.”

Laura: [laughs] Well, she basically said something along the lines of he couldn’t stand how free she was. Something along the lines of…

Matt: Oh.

Laura: …he was jealous of her independence. And he was jealous that he couldn’t tame it. So he killed her in an act of passion, and then once he came to his senses he then killed himself. So it was really interesting…

Micah: Yeah.

Laura: …I thought to hear about the stories behind a couple more of the Hogwart’s ghosts, just because we didn’t know about them and there was – there were some…

Andrew: Yeah, really.

Laura: …things about the ghosts that weren’t clarified, so…

Micah: Yeah.

Matt: Yeah.

Micah: What’s interesting is that all the way back in Episode 61, on our Halloween episode, we tried to figure out just what’s with the Bloody Barron and why is he so dot, dot, dot, bloody.

[Laura laughs]

Micah: And we also asked about the Gray Lady and, you know, so it’s kind of interesting that thinking that, oh, you know, a hundred episodes later we’re finally discussing their importance in the series, but I just thought I’d throw that in there.

Laura: Yeah.

Micah: So we were – we were thinking about it all the way back in 2006, but…

Andrew: Yeah. That was a good, very timely discussion, too, that Halloween ghost…

Laura: Oh, wow, that was a great show.

Micah: We discussed, or debated, whether Halloween is a morally vapid holiday, which encourages delinquency.

Laura: Oh yeah!

Andrew: Right, and Jamie complained about Halloween, that it’s a bad holiday for whatever reason.

Matt: He’s just jealous because he doesn’t celebrate.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: All right, so moving along, Harry then discovers that she had hidden the diadem in the trunk of a tree in Albania and makes the connection, realizing Voldemort had once hidden – had once hidden there. He then asks her if she told the story to another student, Tom Riddle. And of course she says yes, because he was very charming.

Laura: Yeah, and this is just – this chapter is full of so many defining moments in this book series, I’ve noticed. Just like – I know that, at least when I was reading the book for the first time, and she said, “I hid it in Albania,” I was just like, “Oh [bleep].”

Andrew: Right, right.

Laura: And you can bleep that. [laughs] But that was definitely my reaction, so…

Andrew: Yeah. It’s like, cripe, you’ve only got ’til midnight. Running out of time!

Laura: Yeah.

[Micah and Laura laugh]

Micah: This was just so…

Laura: Because…yeah. Go ahead, Micah.

MuggleCast 147 Transcript (continued)

Everything Works Out a Little Too Conveniently

Micah: No, I mean, this is just one of those chapters, and again I understand that you’ve got to get to the point and you’ve got to find the Horcrux and you’ve got to destroy it. But it all just goes back to, you know, this is similar to me to how they infiltrated the Ministry and just things were just a little bit unrealistic in a sense. This part of the chapter’s like oh, well he’s been at Hogwarts for six years, didn’t even know that the Gray Lady was the Ravenclaw House ghost, and then all of these things just start falling into place out of no where. It just seemed a little bit too easy for me.

Laura: Well, to be fair, though…

Matt: Well, how come nobody knew? I mean, do you think anyone, even the ghosts at Hogwarts, knew she was the daughter of Rowena Ravenclaw?

Micah: Well, he asked Nearly Headless Nick, who’s the Raven-ha – [laughs] – Ravenclaw House ghost…

[Laura and Micah laugh]

Micah: And he…

Matt: He’s the Gryffindor House ghost.

Micah: Right. But he was almost offended that Harry didn’t know that it was the Gray Lady.

Matt: Right.

Laura: Yeah.

Matt: No, I think – wasn’t he offended that he wanted to ask the Gray Lady and not him?

Laura: Yeah, I think that’s right. But, I mean, it wouldn’t really be that surprising, because you can’t assume that all of the ghosts are of the same vintage, if that makes any sense? Obviously, the Gray Lady and the Bloody Baron are, but if Nearly Headless Nick was born hundreds of years after the Gray Lady, who’s to say if he would know if she was the daughter of Rowena Ravenclaw?

Andrew: Right. Yeah, definitely.

Matt: I mean, as soon as you find out you kind of see like, oh, well, duh. I mean, it’s almost kind of obvious.

Laura: Well, in all fairness too, even though Harry didn’t really know the Gray Lady was the ghost of Ravenclaw, the fans did, or at least should have, because Jo did say that at one point, if I do recall correctly.

Andrew: Well, Micah, also – I mean, you said that it seemed also a little too convenient. I mean at this point it doesn’t surprise me that Harry can work this all out in his head. Because I know what you mean, there is a lot of Harry just working through all this. But it did all connect, I think.

Micah: Yeah, it…

Andrew: And I think the big clue was that Voldemort was telling – Voldemort – Voldemort had two of his Death Eaters waiting for Harry in Ravenclaw’s common room, so he knew Harry was on to something.

Micah: Yeah, but I’m just referring to the part where, you know, nobody had seen the diadem in living memory, and then all of a sudden Harry goes, “Oh, in living memory. I should go talk to a ghost.” And it’s kind of the same thing that happened when he sees the Gargoyle’s head on the floor, and all of a sudden it triggers the whole, you know, statue he saw in Xenophilius Lovegood’s house, and that triggers the thing that he saw in Half-Blood Prince when he was hiding the potion book. It was just – I don’t know. It was too coincidental.

Ben: Well, you know, Micah, you’re a sports fan, right?

Micah: I am a sports fan.

Ben: Did you watch the Lakers/Spurs last night?

Micah: I did.

Ben: You see how in the end how Kobe Bryant had that killer instinct and just went for it, you know?

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: You know, that makes a man a legend.

Micah: It does.

Ben: That’s what Harry Potter was doing.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: He had to figure everything out instantly, you know? It had to happen, it had to come to him, he’s Harry Potter. He had to come through in the clutch, otherwise he wouldn’t be Harry Potter.

Andrew: Right, yeah. And this is the Harry Potter series where everything has to be resolved at the end of the book, so…

Micah: All right, all right. I’m just trying to create some discussion.

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: No, no, no you brought up some very good points, Micah.

Ben: I’m sorry, Micah.

Andrew: And Ben brought up a very good point too.

Micah: No, it’s fine. Kobe’s a good player.

Andrew: You guys kiss and make up? We’re all good now? We can move on?

Micah: We’re good.

Andrew: So, we’ve been discussing all of this after realizing that Voldemort has picked up the diadem – had picked the diadem up while hiding in Albania. Harry remembers that Voldemort had attempted to get a teaching job at Hogwarts and that he must’ve brought the diadem back and hidden it in the castle then. Of course he knows, like we were saying, Harry’s making all these connections. And then, who does Harry run into?

Matt: Voldemort.

Andrew: No.

Laura: No, I think someone should do the voice.

Andrew: Oh, yes. Hagrid!

Ben: Oh.

Laura: I love how we’re just waiting for Ben to catch on.

Ben: [imitating Hagrid] Rubeus Hagrid!

Matt: [imitating Ben] What are we talking about?

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: I was about to do a Dumbledore, but I don’t think he ran into him.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: No, I don’t think so. Okay, so Harry runs into Hagrid. This is – okay, Micah, I can see this is a little convenient.

Micah: Well, it’s more like Hagrid rams into Harry.

Andrew: Yeah, no, but I mean, just the timing of it all. It’s a very nice coincidence. And also in the book, it’s – Hagrid is described as running, so I’m really looking forward to seeing him actually run, along with Fang and Harry. That should be a pretty funny sight.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: So then, of course, this is when Harry realizes “Oh, okay. It was the Room of Requirement! Voldemort’s too stupid to think that nobody else will be using it, that nobody else would discover it. Of course Harry did and so did many other people.

Micah: Well, this is the part that I was talking about before, not to go too crazy, but all these connections that he starts drawing once he saw the head of the statue of the gargoyle that was lying on the floor.

Andrew: Yeah. Oh, yeah, I understand what you’re saying, but at this point in the game, Harry’s in his seventh year. No, he’s not. Yeah, he is. He’s in his seventh year at Hogwarts and, Harry’s a smart guy. And maybe he works best under pressure, when he knows he has only so much time to figure everything out.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: You know, things just click with him.

Laura: Well, it’s kind of like, you know how there are some people, myself included, who write possibly the best papers they will ever write in their lives when they haven’t started them until midnight the day before they’re due?

Andrew: Right. Right.

Laura: So…

Andrew: Right. I personally – I work best under pressure.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: And I’ll just work non-stop until it’s done.

Micah: Well, it’s because we’re deadline-oriented, you know?

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Mhm.

Andrew: Yeah.

Integration of Past Books

Micah: The other thing I wanted to bring up, in this scene in particular, that I thought was kind of cool, was J.K. Rowling starting to tie different parts of the story together. For example, you know, he’s running down the hall and then he sees Neville with all the mandrakes from Chamber of Secrets, and then he runs past – or Sir Cadagon is following him throughout the halls and he played a big role in Prisoner of Azkaban. And then, all of a sudden, there’s Mrs. Norris swiping at a bunch of owls. So, I thought it was kind of cool how she was integrating all these random things that we have learned about throughout the course of the series.

Matt: It was a really nice little like reunion before everyone dies kind of thing.

[Lauren and Micah laugh]

Laura: One last hoorah. We all get together and tonight we dine in Hell.

[Everyone laughs]

Laura: And didn’t he also see Neville’s gran?

Micah: Yeah.

Laura: Didn’t she also pop up somewhere?

Andrew: Yeah! And she even said, “Okay, I’m going to go help out Neville.”

Matt: And we saw Aberforth. I mean, we saw everybody. I mean, everybody was there. Dumbledore was there, right?

If Dumbledore Were in the Battle…

Andrew: If Dumbledore was in this situation, if he was in the middle of the battle at Hogwarts, what do you think he would say to Harry?

Ben: Well, I mean, I think he’d have a very good word of advice for him, you know? I mean, that’s what Dumbledore does, you know?

Andrew: Yeah. No, but I mean, you know…

[Laura laughs]

Andrew: If we were to get an audio representation of it, you know what I mean? Sort of like an impersonation, I guess you could say.

Ben: [imitating Dumbledore] It is our choices, Harry, far more than our abilities, that determine what we truly are.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Yay.

Ben: You mean something like that?

Andrew: Something like that, yeah.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: I think you’re right. You’re right.

Ben: Give it up for Molly Weasley!

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: So what happens next, Micah?

Ron and Hermione Scene

Micah: So then Harry runs into Ron and Hermione, who have been in the Chamber of Secrets collecting Basilisk fangs to get rid of Horcruxes.

Andrew: Now, this is the thing – hold on, let me cut you off for a second – this is the thing got a lot of debate, and I remember we were talking about this on the summer tour, about Ron suddenly being able to speak Parsteltongue. And what was the explanation we came up with?

Matt: He remembered what Harry said.

Laura: He had heard what Harry said, yeah.

Matt: After five years, he remembered exactly what Harry said?

Laura: No, but didn’t he already speak Parsteltongue in the book too? In Book 7?

Micah: Yes, he did.

Laura: So, it could be that Ron actually remembered what Harry said…

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: …in the seventh book. And also, we learned that Ron is a good mimic because he also mimicked Wormtail when they were in Malfoy Manor.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Yeah, but I mean, come on.

Andrew: But I think it was just the thing about having the Parseltongue ability. Like, only those with the ability could truly speak it and truly get, say, the Chamber of Secrets to activate.

Matt: Well, also, what we’re finding out in this chapter, especially, is that there’s more than one way to kill a Horcrux, too.

Andrew: Yeah.

Matt: Not only can you get a sword, but you can use fire, you can use a Basilisk fang, you can use – I mean, it’s almost like there’s hundreds of ways to get rid of it.

Andrew: Yeah.

Micah: After they all establish they need to get to the Room of Requirement, what happens? Finally everybody can, you know, put down the gloves on either side of the fight about who was going to get together throughout seven books.

Laura: Dun dun dun dun!

Matt: Who was it?

Micah: Oh, it was Aberforth and his goat.

[Laura laughs]

Matt: Oh, right!

Micah: I’m looking forward to – no, I’m not even going to say anything because that’s…

Andrew: No, you are. You love goats. You love everything about them.

[Laura laughs]

Matt: This is going to be a great scene in the movie.

Andrew: Yeah.

[Matt and Micah laugh]

Andrew: It really is. It really is.

Laura: Yeah.

Encounter with Draco, Crabbe, and Goyle

Andrew: So, they’re searching – they’re in the Room of Requirement – they’re searching for the diadem and they run into Draco, Crabbe and Goyle and Harry goes, “Oh, great! Just when I’m about to make a breakthrough, I’m about to get rid of that Horcrux, the last Horcrux, or at least what I think is the last Horcrux…”

Matt: He doesn’t say that!

Andrew: No, he doesn’t, but this is what’s going through his head.

Matt: Oh.

Andrew: Suddenly, these three show up, and boy, are they out to kill. Avada Kedavra, curses are flying all over the place, Stunning Spells, fire.

Matt: From Crabbe and Goyle, no less.

Micah: Yeah.

Andrew: From Crabbe and Goyle.

Micah: Did this surprise you guys at all? I mean, Crabbe and Goyle firing these spells?

Matt: Well, you finally get to hear them talk.

Ben: Well, I guess they finally have come of age. You know?

Andrew: Yeah, not just that, but then also it’s either Crabbe or Goyle who says to Draco, “Who cares if we don’t bring him into Voldemort alive? You and your father are done for anyway.” So it’s like, they’re on Draco’s side, but they know he’s done for anyways, so why help Draco to the point of killing him?

Matt: Yeah, they were always loyal to Draco because of his family and everything, and now they know Draco’s nothing, they’re like, “who are you to tell us what to do now? You know we can kick your butt now, if we want.”

Laura: Yeah, and Crabbe also got kind of power hungry, because, you know, like he was saying he didn’t care if he killed Harry even though that wasn’t what Voldemort wanted. So…

Andrew: Right.

Micah: Yeah, which would have been real smart on his part. He would have…

Laura: Yeah.

Micah: …have ended up dying anyway.

Matt: Well, he’s not exactly the most intelligent character in the series, anyway, so…

Laura: Yeah, too stupid to live as we can see…

[Andrew and Matt laugh]

Laura: …you know? So anyhow, as they’re – as they’re duking it out in the Room of Requirement, Crabbe ends up casting a curse, which we later learned is called Fiend Fyre, and what’s interesting about this is it’s at first sort of a wall of fire that’s chasing after them and it’s eating away at the Room of Requirement, but then it breaks down and turns into this army of like – of fiery creatures like dragons and serpents, and chimeras, and their only means of escape is they find a pair of broomsticks, and Harry gets on one and Ron and Hermione get on the other. Now, one of my favorite moments from this chapter happens now, because as they’re flying away Harry sees Draco and Goyle and they’re about to be consumed by the flames, and as Harry dives down to try and save Draco, Ron yells, “If we die for them, I’ll kill you, Harry.”

Matt: Okay, it’s – it’s Fiend Fyre.

Laura: Fiend Fyre.

Matt: Or Fiend Fiery.

Laura: Okay.

Andrew: Yeah, so Laura got it. Yeah, and that’s an awesome – is Ron basically saying that if they – if they die trying to kill Crabbe and Goyle…

Matt: It’s kind of like a double-negative isn’t it?

Laura: Yeah. Oh, it is, but it’s funny because it’s essentially Ron saying, you know, “These guys have been on our backs for the last seven years…”

Andrew: Right.

Laura: “…they’ve never given us a break…”

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: “…and not only are they jerks, but they’re on Voldemort’s side and now you’re trying to save them. Stop being so freaking noble.”

Matt: Well, just a second ago they were trying to kill them. I mean, they’re the reason there’s fire around them, and now we’re going to save their butts?

Andrew and Laura: Yeah.

Micah: Well, it ends up paying huge dividends…

Laura: Yeah, it does.

Micah: …a couple of chapters from now.

Matt: Yeah.

Laura: Absolutely. So, essentially what happens is Harry grabs Draco, and Ron and Hermione take Goyle, but they end up not able to save Crabbe, so he perishes in the fire. And Ron was really blunt about it, too, because as soon as they escape, Draco was kind of sniveling and he was, you know, saying, “Crabbe, Crabbe? Where’s Crabbe?” and Ron was just like, “Crabbe’s dead.”

Andrew: Yeah.

Laura: Which is…

Matt: “He’s gone, dude.”

Laura: Yeah. [laughs] A little bit brutal.

A Song for Crabbe

Andrew: So should we play a song for Crabbe? Does any – does anyone have a song in mind for him? I mean, I don’t even think he deserves one, quite frankly.

Laura: He just doesn’t have much of a personality, you know?

Matt: “Burn, Baby, Burn”?

[Laura and Micah laugh]

Andrew: [sings] Burn, Baby, burn. Yeah, yeah, let’s do that!

[Burn, Baby, Burn begins to play]

Andrew: Well, there you go.

[Music fades away]

Micah: So, after they get out of the Room of Requirement… [laughs]… Harry sees that – was it the diadem that was actually bleeding, almost?

Matt: Yeah, it was bleeding…

Laura: Yeah.

Matt: …blood out of it and they’re wondering what was going on, and I think it was Hermione, wasn’t it, that found out that it was Fiend Fyre…

Laura: Yeah.

Matt: …that Crabbe conjured, and Fiend Fyre – Fiend Fyrey – I really don’t know how it’s pronounced, but…

Laura: I think it’s Fiend Fyre.

Matt: Yeah, Fiend Fyre is one of the known killers of Horcruxes or something that just happened to be a huge coincidence.

Fred Dies

Micah: Yeah, another one of those, but – so, now the diadem is destroyed and, again, we get back to the whole battle of Hogwarts. Harry realizes what’s going on around him, and then all of a sudden there’s this huge explosion after they had met up with Percy and Fred, and I don’t even know how to go into this, because this was one of the worst death scenes, I thought, in the entire book.

Andrew: Worse in a good way or worse in a bad way? [laughs]

Matt: Saddest.

Andrew: Oh, saddest?

Micah: Yeah, yeah.

Matt: It’s the most tragic.

Micah: Right. I mean, Hedwig exploding, that was funny, but…

[Andrew and Matt laugh]

Laura: Oh my God! That’s terrible!

Ben: You’re so mean, Micah.

Laura: You’re going to Hell.

Micah: [laughs] Going to Hell? Ooh…

Laura: Yes.

Andrew: Going to Hell for making of a fictional character dying. Okay.

Matt: An owl, too.

Laura: A fictional owl.

Andrew: A fictional owl. [laughs]

Matt: PETA is going to be calling you in, like, a couple hours.

Micah: Who is? PETA? [laughs]

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: All right so, Fred dies, and just skipping ahead to Chapter 32 real quick…

Matt: Well, what I thought was the most, kind of, creepiest of this whole death too, was that you can see Fred laughing. His dead face is him making his last laugh.

Andrew: Oh yeah, you could – what did it say? “His last laugh still etched upon his face.” So…

Matt: That has got to be kind of scary, seeing your brother or, yeah, your brother’s death and he’s just smiling up at you with this great excitement.

Ben: But at least he died happy though.

Laura: Yeah.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah.

Matt: Yeah, after he got crushed, but…

Andrew: Yeah.

Micah: At Percy’s joke, no less.

Andrew: So then Chapter 32, just real quick, first sentence in “The Elder Wand,” Chapter 32, it says, “The world had ended, so why had the battle not ceased? The castle had fallen silent in horror and every combatant laid down their arms.” I’m sorry, it is a sad death, but did it feel like the world had ended? Should it really have felt like the world had ended? I mean, so many people were dying already. I just…

Laura: Well…

Andrew: I don’t know.

Laura: …isn’t that just from Harry’s perspective? I mean…

Andrew: It is from Harry’s perspective, yeah, but…

Laura: Because the Weasleys have been fighting for him for so long and protecting him…

Micah: It was like losing his brother.

Laura: …so he feels responsible. Yeah.

Matt: Because Fred and George have always acted like his big brother, like the ones who – not necessarily like his best friend like Ron was, but more kind of like the guys who would always back you up whenever there was a problem or something. Harry did care for them because he gave them all of his galleons for the Goblet of Fire. So, you know, he had – he saw- he saw Fred and George as like two big brothers of his.

Ben: Yeah.

Matt: And Fred was always the fun one too. He was always the more sarcastic one of the two.

Andrew: So in tribute to Fred, we are going to play “Blinded by the Light”.

[“Blinded by the Light” begins playing]

Andrew: Awww, that’s so sweet.

Everyone: Awwwwwww

[song ends]

Andrew: That does conclude this week’s Chapter-by-Chapter, Chapter 31. Next week is 32, “The Elder Wand,” and of course it’s time for Quote Quiz.

Quote Quiz

Andrew: I’m in a temporary recording set-up right now, so I can’t play the sound effects, but I’ll just do it how I used to. So, I’ll do this.

Ben: Guys, he’s in a temporary recording set-up, just in case you didn’t know he’s moving to Southern California.

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: He’s successfully completed the move…

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: He hasn’t got he stuff set up yet, so – I’m not trying to make a big deal about it on the show or anything.

[Matt laughs]

Ben: It’s a temporary recording set-up.

Andrew: Anyway…

[Matt laughs]

Andrew: Anyway, it’s time for Quote Quiz! [echoes]

“Snape. Now. I need him. There is a service I require from him. Go.” [laughs]

Matt: Wow.

Andrew: That’s Quote Quiz this week.

Ben’s Top 10 List

Andrew: Ben, you were going to bring back an old segment you did awhile ago – you used to. It’s Ben’s Top 10 List. So Ben could only think up a few, so, Ben, you want to start with the ones you have and we’ll each take turns making up an excuse for you.

Ben: No, you guys do the first six then I’ll do the last four.

Andrew: So we’ll start with number ten?

Ben: Yeah, and you can’t use the one that you told me.

Andrew: All right, that’s fine. All right. Matt, number ten?

Matt: He hasn’t been on because he’s busy at Subway where you get $5 foot longs.

Andrew: Ooooh, good.

Ben: Oooh, good, that’s a very good one.

Andrew: Number nine: Ben has been spending time in Notre Dame studying very hard.

Ben: Yeah, Matt beats you.

Andrew: [laughs] It wasn’t a joke. It was very serious. I mean it’s the truth. Number eight, Laura?

Laura: [sighs] He doesn’t care.

Andrew: Oooooo……

Ben: Ooo…. That’s not true.

Laura: I’m just kidding, Ben. I’m just kidding, Ben.

Andrew: Number seven. Micah?

Micah: Because he was filling out adoption papers as the newest member of the Spartz family.

Andrew: Ooooh, snap!

Ben: Oh, no!

[Andrew laughs]

Ben: I’m not. Okay, I wasn’t adopted, really. I just kind of – I don’t know, Emerson and I are pals. We like to collaborate on ideas and such and so…

Andrew: [laughs] Ben, it’s okay to live with Emerson. I mean you don’t have to stick up for it. Number six, Matt?

Matt: Okay, number six, the reason why, is Ben is too busy taking photos of Miss Emma Watson.

Andrew: Number five reason Ben has been away from MuggleCast: he’s been trying to search for WiFi and been driving around Nebraska, but he hasn’t had much luck.

Ben: Yeah, I’ve been stuck up there, so. And the number four reason – oh yeah – I’ve switched book series. I’ve been busy reading Twilight.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: That was my idea, for the record.

Ben: Number three reason, according to Andrew, I’ve had personal issues. Yeah, whatever those are.

Andrew: [laughs] What?

Ben: The number two reason: I was being held hostage by the Pickle Pack vultures.

[Andrew and Matt laugh]

Laura: Oh gosh.

Ben: And the number one reason I’ve missed MuggleCast: I lost the battle against childhood obesity.

[Andrew laughs]

Matt: Awww.

Laura: Awww.

Ben: That’s so sad.

Matt: That’s tragic.

Ben: Just kidding. Just kidding.

Chicken Soup for the MuggleCast Soul

Andrew: All right, Ben, and for old times sakes, to wrap up the show today, do you – would you like to read the Chicken Soup for the MuggleCast Soul?

Ben: Well, you know – you know, Andrew, this has always been my favorite segment.

Andrew: Really?

Ben: Yes. Sierra F., age 15 of Southampton, Pennsylvania. And she writes:

“Hey guys. Last month I underwent ACL reconstruction surgery in my right knee. Everything went exactly as planned, but I was still in a lot of pain once the anesthesia wore off. For the week following the surgery it was hard for me, a fairly able-bodied person, to get used to not even being able to even walk to the bathroom on my own. At times it got to be fairly dehumanizing. During my recovery I didn’t go on the computer a lot, but I had saved a lot of episodes of MuggleCast to listen to during this time, and I’m glad I did. In total I missed about two to three weeks of school, which works out to a lot of boring days and several sleepless nights. Now, as I’m finishing up the work I missed, and studying for finals, I’ve come down with a horrible cold, making it very hard to talk, breathe and, by extension, sleep. But MuggleCast has helped me relax enough to sleep, even when I felt miserable. This last month has been pretty stressful with everything I have had to do to get caught up in school, and I just wanted to thank you all for helping me through my recovery and providing me with the perfect ninety minute break from the world around me. Pickles, Sierra.”

Matt: Aww.

Andrew: Aww, well, that was very sweet.

Ben: Aww, how sweet, you know?

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: It always makes me happy – it always warms my heart to hear that somebody, you know, can use us, you know, to help get them through, you know?

Andrew: Yeah.

Be: You know, some people need – everyone has their own way of escaping and if you really like Harry Potter, I see how a Harry Potter podcast could do that for you.

Matt: Yeah.

Andrew: Yep. That’s why we’ve kept this segment around for so long.

Contact Information

Andrew: Well I think that does wrap up the show for today. We’re going to remind everyone about our contact information. Laura, if someone wants to send us some parcel mail, including maybe some late birthday gifts for me, what’s the P.O. Box?

Laura: Oh, I don’t know about any birthday gifts, Andrew…

Andrew: Aw.

Laura: …but they can send all their parcel mail to P.O. Box 3151, Cumming, Georgia, 30028.

Andrew: Can I also just say thank you to everyone…

Ben: That’s iPods, Zunes, MP3 players…

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah…

Ben: … Xboxes, PlayStations, everything, we take it.

Andrew: Can I also just say thank you to everyone who left me some birthday messages this week on the voice-mail, and my e-mail, on Facebook, it was very nice seeing all those. So, thanks for that.

Ben: Oh, Andrew, did you get a birthday post on MuggleNet?

Andrew: No, I didn’t. Nope.

Ben: Oh my gosh.

Andrew: I did get one – I did get one on, thanks to Laura.

Ben: Aw, dude…

Laura: Aw…

Ben: Did I feel like an ass, because I remembered it was your birthday too, like I saw it on Facebook.

Andrew: It’s okay.

Ben: You wouldn’t forget about me; you should’ve messaged me.

Andrew: It’s okay. Well, all I have to say is that I may forget this year, for you…

Ben: Ooo…

Andrew: …for August. August comes around, I may be a little busy.

Ben: You know, Andrew, you know, Andrew, an eye for an eye just makes the whole world blind.

Andrew: [laughs] What?

Laura: Wow, we’ve got Gandhi on this podcast.

Andrew: Yeah, I know. Anyway, back to MuggleCast here. If you would like to call in a voicemail question, comment, or even a listener rebuttal, you can also use – you can always use the MuggleCast hotline. If you’re in the United States, you can dial 1-218-20-MAGIC. And a couple people from Canada wanted me to point out that you can use that number in Canada. It’s going to cost you a little bit, but there are no Canadian numbers on Skype, so you would have to dial that number.

Ben: [laughs] And it’s your parents’ bill anyways!

Andrew: There you go.

[Ben and Laura laugh]

Andrew: If you’re in the United Kingdom, you can dial 02081440677. And if you’re in Australia, you can dial 0280035668. You can also Skype the name MuggleCast, just remember, no matter how you call us, keep your message under sixty seconds and eliminate as much background noise as possible. You can also visit for a handy feedback form. To contact any one of us just use our first name at staff dot mugglenet dot com. And, as always, don’t forget the community outlets: the MySpace, Facebook, YouTube, Frappr, Last.FM, fanlisting, forums. Follow us on Twitter, Digg the show at and vote for us once a month at Podcast Alley.

Show Close

Now, also, I just wanted to a quick little plug. Matt, Laura, Elysa, and I have started up a new Twilight website, isn’t that right, Laura?

Laura: That is right! Well, the site is, and if you go there currently, we have summaries of each of the books, we have up-to-date news, an entire bio section on Stephenie Meyer, plus an area dedicated to the films, but, shortly, we’re looking to have great things like forums, fan fiction, and even a podcast.

[Show music begins playing]

Andrew: Yes.

Matt: Ooo…

Andrew: It’s going to be your ultimate source for Twilight information, just like MuggleNet is your ultimate source for Harry Potter.

Matt: It just seems like only yesterday, you know, we were bashing Twilight because we thought it was just a girl’s book series.

Andrew: Yeah, and now we’re running a website. No, this does not mean we hate Harry Potter, and we’re going to stop working on MuggleCast or MuggleNet. We’re going to be with it just as much as we’ve always been.

Matt: This is basically just an extra thing the four of us…

Laura: Ooo…

Matt: …want to do in our spare time also.

Laura: You know, I guess this is the time to tell you that I’m going to be handing in my two weeks’ notice.

Andrew: Don’t tell me you’re a TwiHard!

[Laura and Matt laugh]

Andrew: So visit today for all your Twilight information, and that will be one of just a couple plugs we make on the show about TwilightSource. So don’t start hating us just because we’re plugging our new website. So thank you, everyone, for listening. It’s been a great show. Ben, thanks for coming back on. Are we going to see you on again soon?

Ben: Yea. You should. I want to come back around. This is the first prerecorded episode I’ve done in a while.

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: I mean – I mean – No, we’re coming to you live.

[Everyone laughs]

Andrew: Yeah.

Ben: Yeah, but it’s good to be on. It’s good to be back, and next time I hope to be a little more – I hope there’s more interesting things to talk about. I mean, the show wasn’t boring by any means. I’m just saying. I want something spicy. I want a Dumbledore Gay revelation.

[Everyone laughs]

Ben: I want something I can really…

Andrew: Well, those are – those are once – every once in a while, and we just got to wait for them. But anyway, thank you, everyone, for listening this week. Once again, I’m Andrew Sims.

Ben: I’m Ben Schoen.

Laura: I’m Laura Thompson.

Micah: I’m Micah Tannenbaum.

Matt: And I’m Matthew Britton.

Andrew: Thank you, everyone, for listening. We’ll see you next week for Episode 148. Buh-bye.

Ben: Bye.

Laura: Bye!

Blooper 1

Ben: How about that new Miley Cyrus song that’s like, “The last time I freaked out…”

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Ben: “…I was looking down. St-st-st-stuttering, ask me what I’m thinking ’bout…”

Andrew: Ummm…

Ben: “…The next time we hang out, my heart won’t rest ’til then…”

Andrew and Ben: “Woah-oh-oh-oh. I – I can’t wait…”

Andrew: “To see you again!”

Laura: Wow. You guys really know your Miley Cyrus.

Matt: God, Andrew. You are so…

Ben: Andrew’s trying to upstage me. Did you guys see that?

Andrew: No. No. I just got into the moment. I got …

Ben: He’s mad because I got on him for being gullible earlier.

Andrew: [laughs] Yeah. Whatever. Okay. So. Song or not? Come on.

Blooper 2

Micah: They’re going to name their kid Laura.

[Andrew and Matt laugh]

Laura: Ew.

Matt: What if it’s a girl?

Laura: Please don’t.

Ben: You could name your kid Pickles.

Andrew: [laughs] Pickles. Yeah. That would be a cute name.

Matt: No. No. It wouldn’t.

Ben: Woah. It would not.

Andrew: Yes, it would.

Matt: It would not.

[Andrew and Laura laugh]

Laura: That would be terrible.

Ben: That would be a gross name. Who are you kidding? Who would name their kid Pickles?

Andrew: I would!

Laura: Well, you know, some people name their kids odd things like Apple, so I’m fairly convinced there there are parents out there who hate their children.

Ben: Yeah. Michael Jackson had a kid named Blanket.

[Micah laughs]

Andrew: Yeah, and Ka…

Ben: He’s like [impersonating Michael Jackson] “Come here, Blanket.”

Andrew: Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise named their kid Suri.

Matt: [impersonating Michael Jackson] “Aww, my beautiful Blanket.”

Andrew: That’s a nice name. Anyway…